| us that it is true. They tell the story (an amalgam as absorbing as | 1 |
| calzium chloereydes and hydrophobe sponges could make it) how | 2 |
| one happygogusty Ides-of-April morning (the anniversary, as it | 3 |
| fell out,of his first assumption of his mirthday suit and rights in | 4 |
| appurtenance to the confusioning of human races) ages and ages | 5 |
| after the alleged misdemeanour when the tried friend of all crea- | 6 |
| tion, tigerwood roadstaff to his stay, was billowing across the | 7 |
| wide expanse of our greatest park in his caoutchouc kepi and | 8 |
| great belt and hideinsacks and his blaufunx fustian and ironsides | 9 |
| jackboots and Bhagafat gaiters and his rubberised inverness, he | 10 |
| met a cad with a pipe. The latter, the luciferant not the oriuolate | 11 |
| (who, the odds are, is still berting dagabout in the same straw | 12 |
| bamer, carryin his overgoat under his schulder, sheepside out, so | 13 |
| as to look more like a coumfry gentleman and signing the pledge | 14 |
| as gaily as you please) hardily accosted him with: Guinness thaw | 15 |
| tool in jew me dinner ouzel fin? (a nice how-do-you-do in Pool- | 16 |
| black at the time as some of our olddaisers may still tremblingly | 17 |
| recall) to ask could he tell him how much a clock it was that the | 18 |
| clock struck had he any idea by cock's luck as his watch was | 19 |
| bradys. Hesitency was clearly to be evitated. Execration as cleverly | 20 |
| to be honnisoid. The Earwicker of that spurring instant, realising | 21 |
| on fundamental liberal principles the supreme importance, nexally | 22 |
| and noxally, of physical life (the nearest help relay being pingping | 23 |
| K. O. Sempatrick's Day and the fenian rising) and unwishful as | 24 |
| he felt of being hurled into eternity right then, plugged by a soft- | 25 |
| nosed bullet from the sap, halted, quick on the draw, and reply- | 26 |
| in that he was feelin tipstaff, cue, prodooced from his gunpocket | 27 |
| his Jurgensen's shrapnel waterbury, ours by communionism, his | 28 |
| by usucapture, but, on the same stroke, hearing above the skirl- | 29 |
| ing of harsh Mother East old Fox Goodman, the bellmaster, over | 30 |
| the wastes to south, at work upon the ten ton tonuant thunder- | 31 |
| ous tenor toller in the speckled church (Couhounin's call!) told | 32 |
| the inquiring kidder, by Jehova, it was twelve of em sidereal and | 33 |
| tankard time, adding, buttall, as he bended deeply with smoked | 34 |
| sardinish breath to give more pondus to the copperstick he pre- | 35 |
| sented (though this seems in some cumfusium with the chap- | 36 |