RICHARD PAUL RUSSO

WATCHING LEAR DREAM

AT NIGHT SAMUEL SAT beside his old friend Lear and watched him dream, Lear's
dreams manifested in the air above his prone and twisting figure, malformed
creatures and almost familiar people and half-living machines that threatened to
become fully substantial and take on strange and complicated lives of their own
in this world. Samuel, too, had once dreamed dreams like these.

But now he kept watch over his old friend. Kept watch over Lear's dreams. And
destroyed those dreams.

Samuel and Lear. They were the last of their kind.

Samuel acted as a gatekeeper, human Cerberus, guarding the natural world from
the supernatural. Doing so, he kept Lear alive. Watching over him, preventing
the old man's dreams from becoming primed realities loosed and wreaking havoc
upon the world, he held back the executioner's axe. As long as Samuel kept
Lear's dreams at bay, DivCom allowed Lear to live.

Lear had once been a DivCom hero. So, too, had Samuel, and the other
twenty-seven like them. They had dreamed into existence strange and powerful
creatures and superhuman beings, incredible living weapons and organic
star-jumping ships, and then, in full control of their creations, directed them
against the invading forces of an alien civilization that attacked them from
somewhere near the heart of the Milky Way. And they had triumphed.

But the others were all dead now, most of them killed during the conflict,
others by accident or old age; two by suicide. Only Samuel and Lear remained,
and they were no longer needed, the conflict years ended, no other foreseen.
They would have been useless even if needed -- Samuel had no more dreams, and
Lear had lost all control of his own. Neither was a hero anymore.

For years Samuel kept watch over Lear, fought Lear's dreams, and dispatched
every one. For years.

Until the day Lear dreamed Teresa back to life.

DivCom had settled the two of them on a sparsely inhabited world, almost
primitive, habitable but lacking exploitable resources. Set them up in a small
house several kilometers upstream from a village that straddled a swiftly
flowing river which poured over stones and crashed around boulders as it came
out of the dark and craggy mountains. Another hundred and fifty kilometers
further downstream, the river -- much wider and slower by that point -- emptied
into a vast inland sea. Neither Samuel nor Lear had ever seen the inland sea,
and Samuel was certain they never would. He and Lear would live out the rest of
their lives in this house, never going much farther than the village. They would
die here.

Three people stayed with them at the house, two men and a woman provided by
DivCom to cook and clean and garden and maintain the house, to accompany Samuel
and Lear on shopping trips into the village -- for food and supplies, books and
music, clothing and news capsules B and to go with them on those occasions when
Lear felt the need to spend an afternoon or evening or both in the local tavern
drinking himself into a stupor.

The day Lear dreamed Teresa back to life, Samuel was down by the river, dozing
in the shade of a dense tree. The summer air was still and hot, but in the
shade, so close to the river, it was cool. Samuel was half asleep, and he was
almost dreaming.

A normal dream, a human dream, one that would never manifest in the air above
him, never threaten to come to life. Fragmented and incoherent, the dream images
overlaid the thick and leafy branches above him: red and orange flames, a black
vehicle on fire in the snow .... And then he realized Lear was inside the
vehicle, screaming through the flames and the black smoke and Samuel knew Lear
would be burned alive...

The flames scattered, Lear's face dissolved, then coalesced into Carpentier
staring down at him.

"Wake up!" Carpentier was saying. A member of the DivCom contingent, he did most
of the cooking and cleaning a bit of gardening. Errand boy.

Samuel blinked, pushed at Carpentier's arm. "Go away," he said. He wanted his
dream back, even the awful dream of Lear burning alive. Any dream.

"It's Lear," Carpentier said. "He's dreaming."

"Now?"

"Now." Nodding his head. "He wanted to take a nap." A shrug. "He's an old man."

Then so am I, thought Samuel. Yet it was somehow more true of Lear.

"Hurry!" Carpentier insisted.

But there was no hurry. Samuel got slowly to his feet, brushed leaves from his
legs and arms. It was quite possible that Lear's dream creations would fade of
their own accord, but even if they didn't, they would need to manifest for
several hours before they became difficult to dispatch.

He followed Carpentier back to the house, his head swimming in the heat. Dust
puffed up at his feet, and the electric buzz of insect-like creatures oscillated
around him like a fan that provided no relief. Samuel walked slowly, eyes half
closed, vision bleached, ignoring Carpentier's urgings. He was so tired, of
everything.

When they reached the house, Carpentier remained outside with the others --
Arturo Langley and Rashida Gamel, both of whom pretended to be occupied with
outdoor chores. All three of DivCom's people were afraid of Lear's dreams.

Samuel climbed the creaking wooden steps and stood for a few moments in the
shade of the large covered porch, readying himself for what he would have to do
inside. The house was quiet, the air surrounding it still and just as quiet
except for the electric buzz and the hesitant sounds of the DivCom people moving
about. He didn't want to go in. He didn't want to do this anymore. But he opened
the door and stepped inside.

Inside the house wasn't much cooler, though he could feel the air moving about
him, blown by the small, whirring fans in every room. He walked through the
entry and down the hall, then stopped outside Lear's room and listened for
sounds of the old man's dreaming. Nothing, really --the whisper of sheets, a
faint huff of breath. Samuel entered.

He stopped, unable to move.

He had been prepared for almost anything but this.

Life-size, and almost life-like, she hovered in the air above the bed: Teresa.

Teresa had been Lear's wife. And Samuel had betrayed his old friend with her.
Together, Samuel and Teresa had both betrayed him.

She was not yet aware of him. It would be an hour or two, maybe longer, before
she became substantial enough. Samuel stood just inside Lear's door, watching
her. She was talking to someone inside the dream, Lear probably, and her smile
didn't seem a happy one; she looked as if she was about to cry.

She looked so young. No older than the day she had died, perhaps even younger,
while Lear and Samuel had of course aged. She was wearing loose tan pants and a
white short-sleeved shirt, leather sandals on feet still vague and blurred; long
sandy hair that shimmered around her face. Then she brought her hand up and
tugged at her hair in a gesture so painfully familiar it made Samuel's heart
ache.

He knew what he should do. He should dispatch her right now, before this all
went too far. And if he couldn't bring himself to do that, then he should wake
Lear, as dangerous as that could be for both of them, and hope his waking would
destroy her. But he did neither.

He left the room, carefully closing the door. As he came out of the house he
went over to Carpentier and Rashida; Arturo was off a ways, watching them.

"Stay out of the house," Samuel said. "This is going to be a difficult one."

Rashida opened her mouth, but Samuel cut her off before she could say a word.
"Everything will be fine," he said. "I'll be back in a little while, when I'm
prepared. Just stay out of the house."

Then he turned away from them and headed back toward the river.

He sat on the grassy riverbank, gazing into the swirling white and silver-blue
water. The rapids were strong here, but he didn't think they were unnavigable.
He wondered about a boat, a canoe, finding one somewhere nearby, maybe down in
the village. Then he could risk the river, the rocks and the whirlpools, the
heat and the insects and the DivCom people who would come after him once they
realized he had gone, once they realized what he had left behind. He could take
the boat all the way to the inland sea, and from there...

It wasn't Teresa. He knew that. A simulacrum, an imperfect, incomplete
doppelganger. It was only a thing, unliving and in a way unreal, at least for
now.

The last time he had seen Teresa she had been dying...and then dead. He and Lear
had both been with her, waiting for her last breath, the last beat of her heart.
She had died from a vicious bacterial infection, her pain and mind dulled by
analgesics and tropo-opiates. Suffusing her face, though, was an expression that
suggested to Samuel a real sense of peace -- she was already gone from this
world, and was content with that.

But now she was back.

TWO HOURS LATER he returned to the house. The DivCom contingent was still
outside, waiting for him. Carpentier approached, but Samuel glared at the man
until he backed away without a word.

Just outside Lear's room Samuel stopped and stared at his hands. They were
trembling. He felt the trembling all through his body.

He opened the door. Lear was still asleep. Teresa sat on the edge of the bed,
her gaze unfocused, but as Samuel entered the room she turned and looked at him,
eyes widening.

"Samuel?" Her voice was warped and distorted, as if she was speaking through
metallic water.

He didn't reply. Something about her silently snapped into focus, a
solidification, a sharpening of resolution, and she was completely there.

"Samuel?" she said again. This time her voice was almost normal, almost
Teresa's.

He still didn't reply. She stood and walked toward him, then reached out and
touched his arm with warm dry fingers, and he shivered inside, his chest
collapsing in on itself.

"Samuel," she said for the third time, but now there was no question.

Finally his volition returned, along with breath and pulse.

"Yes," he said.

She touched him again and he stepped back.

"Do you know who you are?" he asked.

"Yes, of course. I'm Teresa. Don't you know who you are, Samuel?" And she
smiled.

"Do you know what you are?"

Her smile faded, but she nodded. "I am one of Lear's dreams." She paused,
breathing deeply. "But I am still Teresa."

Samuel shook his head, so slowly it seemed the room was moving from side to
side. "No. You are only the Teresa that he imagines you are. Or were. Or the
Teresa he wanted you to be."

This time it was her turn to shake her head. "You're wrong, Samuel. I am
everything he knows about me, whether he liked it or not. He can't change his
own knowledge of me."

"It's not that simple. Besides, there were so many things about you that he
could never have known. That only you knew. Or I knew. Things that you can't
know about yourself because he never knew them."

"Then help me, Samuel. Help me to become me. Tell me the things that you know,
that Lear never knew."

He turned away from her. This was insane. He needed to bring her under control,
and dispatch her before it became too difficult. Except that it was already too
difficult.

"Samuel. What would you tell me about myself? What would you tell me that Lear
doesn't know?"

He was looking across Lear's sleeping body and out the small window, gazing at
the fruit trees behind the house. The reddish-orange fruit, in clusters of three
or four tiny spheres, was almost ripe. Another few days and the bitterness would
be gone and the fruit would be sweet, the thick juice cool and refreshing.

"You were his wife," Samuel said without looking at her. "He was your husband.
But I loved you too."

"He knows that, Samuel."

Yes, he thought, of course he does. But there was so much more. He turned back
to her. "But what he didn't know was that you loved me as well." He paused, his
stomach folding, clutching at itself. "And we betrayed him."

"He knows that, too," she said.

"He knows?"

Teresa nodded. "I know, and so he must know."

Samuel was too stunned to reply. He looked again at Lear, at the closed eyes and
open mouth. His old friend.

"Come," Samuel said. He turned and walked out of the room, and Teresa followed.

He led the way to his own room. It seemed so stark and empty to him now. He
hesitated for a few moments, then went to the small closet and opened the door.

"You'll have to stay in here until dark," he said. "They'll try to destroy you
if they find out you're still..." What word? "...alive," he finished.

"They might not be able to," she said. And there was something hard and defiant
in her voice.

"That's true," he replied. "But they'll try. And they'll kill me, and they'll
kill Lear."

She stared at him, as though trying to decide something. "All right," she said,
nodding. "And then what?"

"I don't know."

She let out a quiet but harsh laugh and shook her head, but didn't say anything
more. They made a place for her to sit in the closet, a nest of his clothing.
When she was settled in, he shut the closet door, then walked out of the house
and onto the front porch. The three DivCom people were waiting for him.

"It's done," he said.

"Something's wrong." Lear spoke quietly, almost hushed. He looked and sounded
confused.

"What?" Samuel asked.

Lear just shook his head. Somehow he looked even older this evening, old
and/rail and lost.

They were eating out on the front porch, the sky mottled with bits of dark
crimson, remnants of a sunset long gone. Samuel could see the flickering lights
of the village downslope in the distance, and he thought about the walk there in
the dark he'd never made before, the one he would have to make later this night.

"A dream I had," Lear finally said.

"What dream?" Breath catching.

Lear shook his head again. There was pain now in the pale blue eyes almost
hidden beneath furrowed gray brows. "I can't remember. It's... it's..." The old
man's mouth trembled and he blinked his eyes. "Gone," he eventually said, a
strange grieving in his voice.

No, Samuel thought. But there was nothing he could say.

They remained on the porch, drinking coffee as complete darkness fell and the
stars emerged bright and cool, both of the men lost and confused each in his own
private way.

He should have been watching Lear. Lear slept again, tossing fitfully in the hot
darkness of his room, more disturbed than usual. But no dreams formed in the air
above him, and Samuel returned to his own room.

Teresa was waiting/or him, the closet door already open, her eyes aglow in the
night. He motioned for silence, and/or her to follow him.

Carpentier and Arturo were sleeping, but Rashida was on watch, walking about
both inside the house and out. Samuel had her route worked out, and just as
Rashida was coming back inside he led Teresa out the back door and around the
side of the house, into the small grove of fruit trees. The scent of the fruit
hung delicately in the warm night air. The stars provided just enough light for
them to make out their footing, and they moved quickly through the trees.

Once they were out of the grove they worked their way across a stretch of rocky
ground to the road, which roughly followed the course of the river down to the
village.

"Where are you taking me?" Teresa asked.

"There's a village downstream," he told her. "We'll find a room for you, a place
to stay for a few days."

She didn't ask him any more questions, which surprised him, but he was grateful
for that. He didn't think he would have had any more answers.

They walked in silence, but her presence enveloped him, as if there was some
electrochemical quality to her that charged the air, penetrating his skin. And
maybe there was, because of what she was.

As they approached the village, the nearly silent whisper of a breeze and the
gurgling of water gave way to the sounds of humanity -- voices, faint music, the
rumble of motors and clink of glass, cracking, loud hissing -- and trees and
bushes were replaced by low, scattered buildings and vehicles and lights. A few
people were out on the streets walking or pedaling wheeled carts and cycles, and
occasionally a motorized vehicle went by, engine incredibly quiet.

The first place they tried, an inn, was full for the night, but further on was a
tavern where Lear liked to drink. Behind it, facing the river, were several
night rooms. Samuel and Teresa went through the crowded, music-filled tavern and
into the back office, where they talked to Marissa. There was a room available
on the second floor, and Samuel paid for five nights with local money.

The room was surprisingly quiet, and overlooked the river; the moving water
flashed up at them, scales of silver and amber and red. There was a floorbed, a
table and chairs, private bath, a balcony. Teresa sat on the end of the bed, but
when Samuel walked out onto the balcony, she got up and went with him.

He looked up at the night sky. Besides the stars there was only a tiny, distant
moon high in the east, hardly more than a small bright coin in the sky. The only
moon this world had. He'd been on worlds with large, almost brilliant moons
that, when they were full, lit the night almost like day. He missed that. He
missed the roar and the pressure of ships rising from a launch field taking him
into space. He missed the sight of a vast, densely populated city at night as he
descended over it, the combination of moving and stationary colored lights
giving the impression of a living organism pulsing in the dark. He missed so
much, but he especially missed the woman whose simulacrum stood beside him now.

She almost smelled like Teresa.

"Stay with me tonight, Samuel."

He turned to her, and her eyes were bright, almost glowing. Maybe they were
glowing, some strange effect that resulted from her creation. How could he stay
with her She wasn't really Teresa, she wasn't really human.

"Stay with me," she said again.

How could he not? Samuel put his arms around her, feeling his breath catch and
his heart hesitate, and pulled her tightly to him.

He slept lightly and fitfully, always at least partially aware of her presence
beside him, even as he slept. And for the first time in years he dreamed
intensely, dreams so vivid and overwhelming it seemed they would never end.

In the morning they ate breakfast at a small outdoor cafe on the river. Strong
hot coffee, fresh rolls and fresh fruit, thick pieces of sweet cheese. The river
was quieter in the early morning light, and comforting.

She wasn't Teresa. He knew that now even more than before. But she was close
enough. If this went on for long, the differences would become unimportant. No,
that wasn't right. The differences were already unimportant; eventually they
would cease to exist for him.

"What do we do now?" she asked. She was smiling, as if it didn't matter what he
answered. As if she already had something in mind.

"I don't know."

And now she laughed. There was something reckless about her. Teresa, too, had
been reckless; it was one of the things that had attracted him to her. If it had
been up to him to take the initiative, their affair would never have begun.

"I'd better get back," he told her. He handed her the rest of his local money.
"Get what you need, clothes, food, whatever. If you need more money, I'll get
it." It was easier to think about practical matters.

"When will you be back?" she asked.

"It won't be easy. Late afternoon, if I can."

She reached across the table, took his hand in hers, and gently rubbed his
fingers while looking directly at him. Those eyes, still glowing even in the
light of day. Samuel finally got up, reluctantly pulled his hand away, and left.

No one seemed to have noticed that he'd been gone all night. Rashida asked him
where he'd been, and when he said he'd gone into the village for breakfast, that
satisfied her.

Lear, apparently, had not dreamed anything new into existence during the night,
but he still seemed disturbed and confused. "Walk with me," he said to Samuel.

They walked through the grove of fruit trees, side by side in silence for a
while, two old friends with long lives between them. Samuel could already feel
the guilt beginning to settle into him, and he knew that, just as before, the
guilt would not stop him. Other things might, but not the guilt.

"I feel lost," Lear said. "Something's happened, and I don't know what it is. I
feel as if a piece has been carved out of me and devoured." He looked at Samuel
and smiled, shaking his head. "I know, I sound like a madman."

Samuel shrugged. He still didn't know what to say to his old friend. There was a
wooden bench under the largest of the fruit trees, and Lear led the way to it.
He dropped onto the bench with a heavy sigh, and Samuel sat beside him. Lear
tipped his head back and gazed up through the leaf- and fruit-filled branches,
gazed up at tiny windows of aquamarine sky.

"I miss her," Lear said.

"Who?

"Teresa. I still miss her after all these years." He lowered his gaze and looked
off in the direction of the river, though they couldn't see it from here. "I've
been thinking about her a lot."

Which was no surprise to Samuel. But he didn't say anything.

"Do you miss her?" Lear asked, turning to look at him.

Samuel wondered if guilt could appear on his face or in his eyes; would Lear
even recognize it if it did?

"Sometimes," he said.

Lear nodded. He continued to stare at Samuel, as though waiting for him to say
something, or perhaps trying to come to some decision. But Samuel said nothing,
and eventually Lear just shook his head and looked away.

"I want to be alone," Lear said.

Samuel got up, feeling somehow even guiltier than ever, and walked away, leaving
his old friend behind.

As he neared the village, Samuel had to fight the urge w break into a run. He
was a young man again, heart and mind battling each other, love and betrayal
rekindled, and somehow he didn't care that she wasn't really Teresa, that she
was an organic dream creation of the man he was betraying once again. And he
couldn't believe he was doing this.

When he arrived at the room, she wasn't there, and panic kicked in. He hurried
into the tavern, but she wasn't there, either. Frantic, he ran out into the
street, gaze jumping back and forth, whipping about in all directions, but there
was still no sign of her anywhere.

He leaned against a wall and closed his eyes, forced himself to calm down and
relax. She had to be somewhere nearby. The village wasn't that big, and she
could take care of herself, probably better than he could. He opened his eyes
and set off down the street, searching for her.

HE FOUND HER across the river at the village airfield. She was sitting in the
makeshift open air terminal, watching a small jumper plane preparing for
takeoff. He sat beside her, and she took his hand in hers; her skin was warm and
dry and her touch was almost electric.

"Let's go away," she said, not looking at him, still watching the plane. "We can
take a jumper to Aleron City and the space port, then we get a ship off this
world and start over again somewhere. Without Lear, without the DivCom people."
She turned to him, eyes sparkling with her smile. "Just the two of us, Samuel."

He started to ask her if she was serious, but he knew she was. So he just shook
his head, a strange fear growing inside him.

"I can't," he said. "They won't let me leave this place. They certainly won't
let me leave this world."

"We'll find a way." Spoken with absolute certainty.

"It's not that simple."

"It is," she said. "If you want it. We'll find a way."

"What about Lear? They'll kill him."

"No, they won't." But there wasn't the certainty in her voice this time, and she
looked away from him. "They'll figure out something else. Drugs, maybe, to keep
him from dreaming. Something like that."

Samuel shook his head.

"There's no other way," she said. "You have to realize that. How long will it be
before they discover what's happened? Before someone finds out about me?" She
turned back to him. "I love you, Samuel, and if you love me...."But she left it
unfinished.

He looked into her eyes, deep into those dark and shining eyes, and had no
answer for her.

He spent the days with Teresa, and the nights with Lear.

Leading two lives again, as he had so many years ago, and knowing that this time
it couldn't go on for very long before something disastrous occurred. But
knowing that didn't change a thing.

"Teresa is alive!" Lear staggered up the steps of the front porch, flushed and
out of breath. He held onto the railing for support and said, "She's alive."

Samuel didn't respond. Fear caught his breath. Could Lear really have seen her?

Still breathing hard, his gray hair wild about his head, Lear pushed away from
the railing and sat across the table from Samuel. Sweat rolled from his
forehead, but his eyes glittered with life and madness. He picked up Samuel's
iced drink, brought it to his mouth, and drained the entire glass. He set the
glass down, dug out some ice and pressed it against his face.

"She was in the village," he finally said. "I saw her."

"It couldn't be," Samuel said. "Someone who looked like Teresa, that's all.
Teresa's dead."

"No." Lear shook his head, adamant.

"We saw her die, remember? We were there."

"No," Lear said again. "I called out her name and she turned, and when she saw
me her face lit up and she said my name. She knew me." He paused, confusion
distorting his expression. "Then she suddenly seemed frightened, and she ran off
into the crowds. I tried to follow, but I lost her."

"You're imagining things, my old friend." Samuel leaned forward and looked
steadily into Lear's eyes. "We both lost her years ago." And immediately
regretted saying it, knowing it was exactly the wrong thing to say.

Lear's expression darkened. He stood slowly, gaze never leaving Samuel. "Still
the same," he said. "You can't stand it. You never had her to lose. She was
mine. She's alive, 'old friend.' And you won't have her this time, either."

He turned away and hobbled down the porch steps, back into the heat and the sun,
leaving Samuel alone and afraid.

"Why did you answer him?" Samuel asked.

They were sitting at the table inside her room, drinking coffee, watching and
listening to the afternoon thundershower that did little to ease the day's heat.

"It was an automatic response," she answered, not looking at him. "My name being
called out like that, I just reacted."

"No," he said. "You can't get away with that. He told me that you saw him, then
called out his name."

Her head came around fast and she glared at him with angry defiance. "He's my
husband."

"He's not.... "But then Samuel stopped. What was the point? It didn't matter
what he said to her, she would do and say and think as she wanted. And she
refused to believe that she wasn't as much Teresa as the real Teresa had been.
"He's old," Samuel said, "and his mind doesn't work right anymore, but he'll
figure it out."

"Figure what out?" she asked, still defiant, daring him to say it.

"What you are."

And then a smile appeared, joining the defiance. "And what am I, Samuel?" When
he didn't answer, she got up and went to him, took his hands in hers and pulled
him to his feet, then led him to the bed. "Who am I, Samuel?"

"Teresa," he whispered, and wrapped his arms around her, breathing deeply of her
scent which only intensified as he felt her lips on his neck and cheek, her
hands gripping his shoulder and back. "Teresa."

Samuel sat out on the balcony, gaze only vaguely focused on the water rushing
past below him, the swirl and spray almost hypnotic. Teresa was asleep in the
room, and he thought he could feel that electric buzz of her presence even out
here.

I'm losing control, he thought to himself. And then almost laughed aloud at the
absurdity. He'd never really had any control over what was happening now. Not
one bit since Lear had dreamed her back to life.

He looked into the room through the open doorway. Teresa, sprawled naked on top
of the bed, seemed perfectly at ease, unconcerned about a thing. She would leave
soon. With or without him, she would leave.

He returned his gaze to the river. The heat from the sun overhead baked all
energy from his limbs. Which was, he thought, as it should be. There was nothing
he could do but wait for it to happen.

He sat on the porch in the afternoon heat, a strip of sun on his bare ankles,
almost burning his skin. He was drinking iced coffee and reading, and he was
waiting for Lear to return from the village. He set the book down and gazed
along the path that led to the road, but there were no signs of Lear.

Rashida Gamel came out of the house and stood next to the table, looking down on
Samuel.

"I don't like this," she said.

"What?"

"Lear's excursions into the village. Something's going on, and I don't like it.
Especially since he always insists on going alone."

Samuel shook his head. "But you always send Carpentier or Arturo to follow him,
don't you? You know where he goes, what he does. He's not trying to 'escape,' is
he?"

"We don't know what he's doing. He seems to be searching for something. Or
someone."

"Ask him," Samuel suggested.

"I have. He doesn't answer."

Samuel smiled, though he was certain that would annoy her. "He's an old man," he
said. As if that would somehow explain it all.

Rashida frowned at him, but didn't say anything more. Something caught her
attention and she looked toward the road. Samuel followed her gaze and saw Lear
shuffling along the roadway, looking tired and dejected. Lear turned up the
path, dust kicking up from his feet, and walked toward them. When he reached the
porch he climbed the steps without once looking at Rashida or Samuel, then went
into the house.

Rashida remained on the porch until Arturo appeared on the road. As he came up
the path he looked at Rashida and shrugged, shaking his head. Then he, too,
climbed the porch steps and went inside.

"I don't like it," Rashida said once again. Then she turned and followed the
others into the house.

HALF AN HOUR later, Samuel was on the road to the village, and so preoccupied he
hardly noticed his surroundings. Rashida worried him. Her suspicions would
probably never be allayed, and he suspected it wouldn't be long before she had
Arturo or Carpentier following him as well. And Lear worried him, with his foul
moods and his own suspicions, his daily trips into the village searching for
Teresa. Samuel had warned her, but he didn't trust her to be careful. Right now
everything worried him, particularly since it seemed there was nothing he could
do about any of it.

Dark, heavy clouds scudded in overhead, bringing with them a damp and electric
feel to the air. There was a silent, generalized flash sheeting across the
clouds, then a few seconds later came a crash of thunder that rumbled quickly
away. A few seconds more, and the rain started.

He was on the outskirts of the village, and he broke into a halting trot,
hugging the few scattered buildings, stopping for a few moments whenever there
was complete shelter and catching his breath before plunging back into the rain.
He found it all strangely exhilarating.

He was soaking wet by the time he reached the tavern, where he finally slowed to
a walk as he went around back. As he climbed the stairs to the second floor, the
rain let up a little, became a drizzle washing across his face; he stopped
outside Teresa's door and, tilting his head back, opened his mouth to the water.

He was still standing like that when Teresa opened the door. She smiled. "Look
at you," she said. Then she took his arm and gently pulled him inside.

In the bathroom, he took off all his clothes and hung them in the shower, then
dried off with towels, wrapping one around his waist like a skirt. He looked at
himself in the mirror, suddenly dismayed. I'm an old man, too. The hair on his
chest was almost completely white, coarse and kinked; the outline of his ribcage
was distinct; and the skin under his neck was beginning to sag. Deep lines
fanned out from his eyes.

What did she see in him? He had no idea.

When he came out of the bathroom, Teresa had coffee ready, made in a small
steamer she'd bought. She handed a cup to him and said, "We need to talk."

An ache mushroomed in his chest, then dropped into his gut, but he nodded. They
went out onto the balcony, which was sheltered from the rain, and sat facing
each other. Samuel drank from his coffee, then set it under the chair.

"What is it?" he asked her.

Teresa shook her head. "The same thing, Samuel. We can't keep this going. Lear
coming into the village every day looking for me. You coming later, for just a
few hours, then going back to keep watch over his dreams. It's time, Samuel."

He didn't answer. He knew she was right, but he still didn't know what to do.
The choice was simple enough.

"I'm leaving," she said. "I have to, Samuel. I can't stay here any longer. Not
in this town, not on this world. This isn't the life I want, the life I need.
And I can't risk it any longer, that DivCom will find out about me. You said it
before, they'll try to destroy me if they know." She paused. "So I'm leaving. I
want you with me, Samuel. But if you choose to stay, I'll go without you."

He knew she wasn't bluffing, and he knew she was right to go. The risks were
growing every day, and there was little they could do about them.

"What are you going to do, Samuel?"

Thunder cracked and rumbled, but he hadn't seen the lightning. The rain
intensified again, becoming a darker, louder curtain between the balcony and the
river.

"I don't know," he finally said.

"You have to decide," she told him. "Today. Before you leave." She drank slowly
from her coffee, as though savoring it. "I won't be here tomorrow."

A simple choice. Go with Teresa, or stay with Lear.

What would DivCom do if he went? As long as they didn't know about Teresa, they
might just let him go. But what would they do to Lear?

Samuel looked out through the pouring rain at the river gone almost completely
gray, only hints of pale blue occasionally winking up at him from the water.

What did he owe Lear? What did he owe to this woman, this Teresa simulacrum who
only existed because of what he hadn't done? And what did he owe to himself?

The front door opened and Lear staggered into the room. His hair was wet and
wild about his head and his eyes were just as wild, shifting crazily from side
to side until he saw Teresa and Samuel out on the balcony. Samuel stared at Lear
through the open doorway as if the old man were an apparition, not quite
believing Lear had found them, and yet not quite surprised either.

Lear slowly crossed the room and stopped in the doorway, looking back and forth
between Teresa and Samuel. Teresa set her coffee at her feet and stood, gazing
steadily at Lear. Samuel remained seated -- not out of paralysis, but more out
of a strange inertia, as though all of this no longer had much to do with him.
This was between Lear and Teresa now.

"I knew you were alive," Lear said.

"Yes," Teresa replied. "I'm alive."

"All this time..." Lear shook his head as he spoke, and Samuel wondered what
Lear meant--did he really think Teresa had been alive all these years? "All this
time," Lear continued, "you were with him."

"Yes."

"Just like before."

"Yes."

Lear turned to Samuel. "I knew before," he said. "I knew, but I loved you almost
as much as I loved her, and so I said...nothing. I let it go on, even though it
was tearing me up inside. I let it go on because...because.... "He shook his
head again, then reared it backward, letting out a loud, chopped laugh. He
lowered his head and gazed out at the river. "Because I was a fool."

No one said anything for a long time. A faint flash washed across the gray-black
clouds, and it was several seconds before a quiet rumble reached them.

"Storm's moving on," Lear said. Then he looked at Teresa. "I won't be a fool
this time," he told her.

"You will always be a fool," Teresa said. And Samuel thought she was as mad as
Lear.

"No," Lear responded. "Not this time." Then he cocked his head, staring as if
he'd just noticed something about her for the first time.

Samuel grew suddenly afraid, and the fear shivered through him.

"I know what you are," Lear eventually said. He turned to Samuel. "You let her
live."

Samuel didn't reply. He tried to stand, but now found himself unable to move.
Everything was out of his control.

Turning back to Teresa, Lear said, "I won't let this happen again."

"You don't have any choice," she told him, that defiance in her voice, dating
him.

"This time you're wrong," he said.

And then Samuel knew what Lear was going to do. The fear notched up inside him
and he abruptly stood, knocking over his chair and kicking his coffee over the
edge of the balcony. But it was too late.

Teresa, too, seemed to realize what Lear was going to do, and she stepped back,
but there was nowhere for her to go.

Lear lunged and wrapped his arms around her. They crashed against the balcony
railing, and for a moment Samuel thought the two of them were going over, but
Lear managed to pull back from the railing while maintaining his hold on Teresa.
She struggled in his arms, twisting and squirming, but he was too strong. If
anything, Lear tightened his hold on her.

A glow appeared between Teresa and Lear, shimmering wherever their bodies made
contact. As Samuel stepped forward, sparks began to arc out from the glow with
tiny crackling sounds. He reached out to grab Lear, intending to pull him away
from her, but he was knocked backward by a tremendous jolt, like energy fields
explosively repelling each other.

He lost consciousness. Probably only for a few seconds. When he came to, he was
on his back, staring up at the overhang that sheltered the balcony from the
worst of the storm; scattered raindrops blew in across his face.

He raised his head and saw Teresa still struggling, still without success. The
glow intensified and the sparking increased. Lear held on, mouth open and teeth
bared, his eyes almost luminescent within the shimmering glow that now
surrounded the two of them.

Suddenly Teresa stopped struggling. She hung limply in Lear's arms, and turned
to Samuel. She had that expression on her face once again, the one from the
earlier time she was dying -- acceptance and peace, a readiness to leave this
world.

But Samuel wasn't ready for her to leave. He struggled to his feet and watched
in a shattering grief as she turned back to Lear and embraced him. She screamed
once, and burst into a cascading shower of sparks, like a human fireworks
display. Lear, too, screamed, and arms flailing he fell backward into the room.

Silence. Silence and smoke and the stench of burned flesh.

She was gone.

No, not silence. There was still the rain, spattering on the overhang, hissing
into the river.

Samuel looked over at the spot Where they had struggled, searching for signs of
her -- a piece of charred clothing, or a sandal, a ring, something...anything.
But there was nothing, and he thought he could feel his heart coming apart.

When he finally could move again, he stepped into the room and looked down at
Lear. The old man's flesh was singed in several places, but he had managed to
pull himself to his hands and knees. He looked up at Samuel for a moment, then
leaned back on his haunches, buried his face in his hands and began to sob.

Samuel walked past him without a word, went into the bathroom and put on his
cold, damp clothes. Then he came out, crossed the room without looking at Lear,
and stepped outside. The rain was lighter now, warm and misting, creating a
hushed quiet in the air. He pulled the door closed behind him, then started down
the stairs.

The canoe drifted near the middle of the river, the slow, wide current taking
him toward the inland sea. The sun was low in the western sky to his left, but
the day was still hot. Samuel held the wide-bladed oar across his knees and
watched the makeshift piers slip past him on his right as he continued to drift
downstream. There was a town here at the mouth of the river, but he wouldn't
stop; he needed to go farther.

Would he have gone with her? He still didn't know the answer to that question,
and suspected he never would, but he was content with that, and he didn't think
a lot about it anymore. He didn't think much about Lear, either, and what DivCom
might have done to him. The old man was either still alive, or he wasn't. It
didn't concern Samuel anymore.

The canoe bobbed in the water as the river met the gentle swells of the inland
sea. Directly ahead of him, as far as he could see, was a vast expanse of water,
tiny wavelets flashing golden orange and red reflections of the sun into his
eyes. Another world, another life, it seemed, was out there for him. There were,
he understood, small towns and villages scattered all along the shores of the
sea. One of them would be the right place for him, the right place to stop.

As he drifted past the spit of land that marked the boundary of river and sea,
he saw a few boats out in the water, others pulled up on the beach, and people
on shore, some apparently watching him. He dug his oar into the water and headed
east, away from the setting sun.