Joanne Harris is the author of three previous novels, Sleep, Pale Sister, The Evil Seed and Chocolat. Chocolat was shortlisted for the 1999 Whitbread Novel of the Year Award and is also published by Black Swan. Her latest novel, Five Quarters of the Orange, is now available from Doubleday. Joanne Harris lives in Barnsley, Yorkshire, with her husband and small daughter. Acclaim for Blackberry Wine: 'A lively and original talent' Sunday Times "Harris is at her best when detailing the sensual pleasures of taste and smell. As chocoholics stand advised to stock up on some of their favourite bars before biting into Chocoldt, so boozers everywhere should get a couple of bottles in before opening Blackberry Wine' Helen Falconer, Guardian 'Joanne Harris has the gift of conveying her delight in the sensuous pleasures of food, wine, scent and plants . . . [Blackberry Wine] has all the appeal of a velvety scented glass of vintage wine' Lizzie Buchan, Daily Mail "If Joanne Harris didn't exist, someone would have to invent her, she's such a welcome antidote to the modern preoccupation with the spare, pared down and non-fattening. Not for her the doubtful merits of an elegant and expensive sparkling water or an undressed rocket salad. In her previous novel, Chocolat, she invoked the scent and the flavour of rich, dark, sweet self-indulgence. In Blackberry Wine she celebrates the sensuous energy that can leap from a bottle after years of fermentation . . . Harris bombards the senses with the smells and tastes of times past . . . Harris's talent lies in her own grasp of the quality she ascribes to wine, "layman's alchemy, the magic of everyday things." She is fanciful and grounded at the same time - one moment shrouded in mystery, the next firmly planted in earth. Above all, she has wit' Jenni Murray, Sunday Express www.booksattransworld.co.uk 'Touching, funny and clever narrative . . . [Joanne Harris] is no one-hit wonder — in fact she is so terrific, she can write about anywhere, anything, anyone. And I hope she does so. Soon' Susannah Herbert, Daily Telegraph 'Enchanting' Woman's Journal 'An engrossing tale of mystery, self-discovery and romance ... A hugely enjoyable read' The Lady 'Blackberry Wine is going to appeal to all sorts of people' Angela Lambert, Literary Review 'Both novels [Chocolat and Blackberry Wine] display immense charm - an admirable lightness of touch and warmth of characterization which make for a delightful read' Michael Arditti, Independent 'Harris cleverly interweaves the two narratives and delves into the realms of magic without ever threatening to destroy its mystique' The Big Issue 'This gentle love story is shot through with intoxicating images and a bewitching hero' She AJso by Joanne Harris SLEEP, PALE SISTER THE EVIL SEED CHOCOLAT FIVE QUARTERS OF THE ORANGE BLACKBERRY WINE Joanne Harris BLACK SWAN BLACKBERRY WINE A BLACK SWAN BOOK : 0 552 99800 1 Originally published in Great Britain by Doubleday, a division of Transworld Publishers PRINTING HISTORY Doubleday edition published 2000 Black Swan edition published 2001 13579108642 Copyright © Joanne Harris 2000 'God's Garden' by Dorothy Frances Gurney reprinted courtesy of Burns and Oates Publishers. The right of Joanne Harris to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright Designs and Patents Act 1988. All the characters in this book are fictitious, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. Condition of Sale This book is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, re-sold, hired out or otherwise circulated in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published and without a similar condition including this condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser. Typeset in 11 on 13pt Melior by Hewer Text Ltd, Edinburgh. Black Swan Books are published by Transworld Publishers, 61-63 Uxbridge Road, London W5 5SA, a division of The Random House Group Ltd, in Australia by Random House Australia (Pty) Ltd, 20 Alfred Street, Milsons Point, Sydney, NSW 2061, Australia, in New Zealand by Random House New Zealand Ltd, 18 Poland Road, Glenfield, Auckland 10, New Zealand and in South Africa by Random House (Pty) Ltd, Endulini, 5a Jubilee Road, Parktown 2193, South Africa. Printed and bound in Great Britain by Clays Ltd, St Ives pie. To my grandfather, Edwin Short: gardener, winemaker and poet at heart. Acknowledgements Many thanks go to the following: Kevin and Anouchka for bearing with me, to G. J. Paul, and the Priory Old Boys' Club, to Francesca Liversidge for her inspired editing, to Jennifer Luithlen, to my splendid agent, Serafina Clarke, for showing me the ropes, but not giving me enough to hang myself with, and to Our Man in London, Christopher Fowler. To all my colleagues and pupils at Leeds Grammar School, goodbye, and good luck. I'll miss you. WINE TALKS. EVERYONE KNOWS THAT. LOOK AROUND YOU. ASK the oracle at the street corner; the uninvited guest at the wedding feast; the holy fool. It talks. It ventriloquizes. It has a million voices. It unleashes the tongue, teasing out secrets you never meant to tell, secrets you never even knew. It shouts, rants, whispers. It speaks of great things, splendid plans, tragic loves and terrible betrayals. It screams with laughter. It chuckles softly to itself. It weeps in front of its own reflection. It opens up summers long past and memories best forgotten. Every bottle a whiff of other times, other places; every one, from the commonest Liebfraumilch to the imperious 1945 Veuve Clicquot, a humble miracle. Everyday magic, Joe called it. The transformation of base matter into the stuff of dreams. Layman's alchemy. Take me, for instance. Fleurie, 1962. Last survivor of a crate of twelve, bottled and laid down the year Jay was born. 'A pert, garrulous wine, cheery and a little brash, with a pungent taste of blackcurrant,' said the label. Not really a wine for keeping, but he did. For nostalgia's sake. For a special occasion. A birthday, perhaps a wedding. But his birthdays passed without celebration; drinking Argentinian red and watching old Westerns. Five years ago he laid me out on a table set with silver candlesticks, but nothing came of it. In spite of that he and the girl stayed together. An army of bottles came with her - Dom Perignon, Sto- lichnaya vodka, Parfait Amour and Mouton-Cadet, Belgian beers in long-necked bottles, Noilly Prat vermouth and Fraise des Bois. They talk, too, nonsense mostly, metallic chatter, like guests mingling at a party. We refused to have anything to do with them. We were pushed to the back of the cellar, we three survivors, behind the gleaming ranks of these newcomers, and there we stayed for five years, forgotten. Chateau-Chalon '58, Sancerre '71 and myself. Chateau-Chalon, vexed at his relegation, pretends deafness and often refuses to speak at all. 'A mellow wine of great dignity and stature,' he quotes in his rare moments of expansiveness. He likes to remind us of his seniority, of the longevity of yellow Jura wines. He makes much of this, as he does of his honeyed bouquet and unique pedigree. The Sancerre has long since turned vinegary and speaks even less, occasionally sighing thinly over her vanished youth. And then, six weeks before this story begins, the others came. The strangers. The Specials. The interlopers who began it all, though they too seemed forgotten behind the bright new bottles. Six of them, each with its own small handwritten label and sealed in candle wax. Each bottle had a cord of a different colour knotted around its neck: raspberry red,.elderflower green, blackberry blue, rosehip yellow, damson black. The last bottle, tied with a brown cord, was no wine even I had ever heard of. 'Specials, 1975,' said the label, the writing faded to the colour of old tea. But inside was a hive of secrets. There was no escaping them; their whisperings, their catcalls, their laughter. We pretended indifference to their antics. These amateurs. Not a whiff of grape in any of them. They were inferiors, and we begrudged them their place among us. And yet there was an appealing impudence to these six freebooters, a hectic clash of flavours and images to send more sober vintages reeling. It was, of course, beneath our dignity to speak to them. But oh I longed to. Perhaps it was that plebeian undertaste of blackcurrant which linked us. 10 From the cellar you could hear everything that went on in the house. We marked events with the comings and goings of our more favoured colleagues: twelve beers Friday night and laughter in the hallway; the night before a single bottle of Californian red, so young you could almost smell the tannin; the previous week -- his birthday, as it happened -- a half-bottle of Moet, a demoiselle, that loneliest, most revealing of sizes, and the distant, nostalgic sound of gunfire and horses' hooves from upstairs. Jay Mackintosh was thirty- seven. Unremarkable but for his eyes, which were pinot noir indigo, he had the awkward, slightly dazed look of a man who has lost his way. Five years ago Kerry had found this appealing. By now she had lost her taste for it. There was something deeply annoying about his passivity and the core of stubbornness beneath. Precisely fourteen years ago Jay wrote a novel called Three Summers with Jackapple Joe. You'll know it, of course. It won the Prix Goncourt in France, translated into twenty languages. Three crates of vintage Veuve Clicquot celebrated its publication -- the '76, drunk too young to do it justice, but then Jay was always like that, rushing at life as if it might never run dry, as if what was bottled inside him would last for ever, success following success in a celebration without end. In those days there was no wine cellar. We stood on the mantelpiece above his typewriter, for luck, he said. When he'd completed the book he opened the last of my companions of '62 and drank it very slowly, turning the glass round and round in his hands when he'd finished. Then he came over to the mantelpiece. For a moment he stood there. Then he grinned and walked, rather unsteadily, back to his chair. 'Next time, sweetheart,' he promised. 'We'll leave it till next time.' You see, he talks to me, as one day I will talk to him. I'm his oldest friend. We understand each other. Our destinies are intertwined. Of course there was no next time. Television interviews, newspaper articles and reviews succeeded each other into silence. Hollywood made a film adaptation with Corey Feldman, set in the American Midwest. Nine years passed. Jay wrote part of a manuscript entitled Stout Cortez and sold eight short stories to Playboy magazine, which were later reprinted as a collection by Penguin Books. The literary world waited for Jay Mackintosh's new novel, eagerly at first, then restless, curious, then finally, fatally, indifferent. Of course he still wrote. Seven novels to date, with titles like The G-sus Gene or Psy-Wrens of Mars or A Date with d'Eath, all written under the pseudonym of Jonathan Wine- sap, nice earners which kept him in reasonable comfort for those fourteen years. He bought a computer, a Toshiba laptop, which he balanced on his knees like the TV dinners he made for himself on the nights - increasingly frequent now - that Kerry worked late. He wrote reviews, articles, short stories and newspaper columns. He lectured at writers' groups, held creative-writing seminars at the university. There were so many things to occupy him, he used to say, that he had scarcely any time to do any work of his own -- laughing without conviction at himself, the writer who never writes. Kerry looked at him, narrow-lipped, when he said this. Meet Kerry O'Neill - born Katherine Marsden - twenty-eight, cropped blond hair and startling green eyes, which Jay never suspected were coloured contact lenses. A journalist made good in television by way of Forum? a late-night talk show, where popular authors and B-list celebrities discussed contemporary social problems against a background of avant-garde jazz. Five years ago she might have smiled at his words. But then, five years ago there was no Forum.', Kerry was writing a travel column for the Independent and working on a book entitled Chocolate - a Feminist Outlook. The world was filled with possibilities. The book came out two years later, on a wave of media interest. Kerry was photogenic, marketable and mainstream. As a result she appeared on a number of lightweight chat shows. She was photographed for Marie CJaire, TatJer and Me.', but was quick to reassure herself 12 that it hadn't gone to her head. She had a house in Chelsea, a pied-o-terre in New York and was considering liposuction on her thighs. She had grown up. Moved on. But, for Jay, nothing had moved on. Five years ago he had seemed the embodiment of the temperamental artist, drinking half a bottle of Smirnoff a day, a doomed, damaged figure of romance. He had brought out her maternal instincts. She was going to redeem him, inspire him and, in return, he would write a wonderful book, a book which would illuminate lives and which would all be due to her. But none of that happened. Trashy sci-fi was what paid the rent; cheap paperbacks with lurid covers. The maturity, the puckish wisdom of that first work, had never been duplicated, or even attempted. And for all his brooding silences Jay had no temperament to speak of. He had never given in to an impulse. He never really showed anger, never lost control. His conversation was neither brilliantly intelligent nor intriguingly surly. Even his drinking - his one remaining excess -- seemed ridiculous now, like a man who insists upon wearing the outmoded fashions of his youth. He spent his time playing computer games, listening to old singles and watching old movies on video, locked in his adolescence like a record in a groove. Maybe she was mistaken, thought Kerry. He didn't want to grow up. He didn't want to be saved. The empty bottles told a different story. He drank, Jay told himself, for the same reason he wrote second-rate science fiction. Not to forget, but to remember, to open up the past and find himself there again, like the stone in a bitter fruit. He opened each bottle, began each story with the secret conviction that here was the magic draught that would restore him. But magic, like wine, needs the right conditions in order to work. Joe could have told him that. Otherwise the chemistry doesn't happen. The bouquet is spoiled. I suppose I expected it to begin with me. There would have been poetry in that. We are linked, after all, he and I. But this story begins with a different vintage. I don't really mind that. Better to be his last than his first. I'm not even the star of this story, but I was there before the Specials came, and I'll be there when they've all been drunk. I can afford to wait. Besides, aged Fleurie is an acquired taste, not to be rushed, and I'm not sure his palate would have been ready. 14 London, Spring 1999 IT WAS MARCH. MILD, EVEN FOR THE CELLAR. JAY HAD BEEN working upstairs - working in his way, with a bottle at his elbow and the television turned on low. Kerry was at a party -- the launch of a new award for female authors under twenty-five - and the house was silent. Jay used the typewriter for what he thought of as 'real' work, the laptop for his science fiction, so you could always tell what he was writing by the sound, or lack of it. It was ten before he came downstairs. He switched on the radio to an oldies station, and you could hear him moving about in the kitchen, his footsteps restless against the terracotta tiles. There was a drinks cabinet next to the fridge. He opened it, hesitated, closed it again. The fridge door opened, Kerry's taste dominated here, as everywhere. Wheat-grass juice, couscous salad, baby spinach leaves, yoghurts. What he really craved, Jay thought, was a huge bacon-and-fried-egg sandwich with ketchup and onion, and a mug of strong tea. The craving, he knew, had something to do with Joe and Pog Hill Lane. An association, that was all, which often came on when he was trying to write. But all that was finished. A phantom. He knew he wasn't really hungry. Instead he lit a cigarette, a forbidden luxury reserved for when Kerry was out of the house, and inhaled greedily. From the radio's scratchy speaker came the voice of Steve Harley singing 'Make me smile' - another song from that distant, inescapable summer of '75 - and for a moment he raised his voice to sing along - 'Come up and see me, make me smi-i-i-ile' forlornly in the echoing kitchen. Behind us in the dark cellar the strangers were restless. Perhaps it was the music, or perhaps something in the air of this mild spring evening seemed suddenly charged with possibility, for they were effervescent with activity, seething in their bottles, rattling against each other, jumping at shadows, bursting to talk, to open, to release their essence into the air. Perhaps this was why he came down, his steps heavy on the rough, unpolished stairs. Jay liked the cellar; it was cool, secret. He was always coming down there, just to touch the bottles, to run his fingers along the dust-furred walls. I always liked it when he came to the cellar. Like a barometer, I can sense his emotional temperature when he is close to me. To some extent I can even read his thoughts. As I said, there is a chemistry between us. It was dark in the cellar, the only illumination a dim light bulb hanging from the ceiling. Rows of bottles - most negligible, chosen by Kerry - in the racks on the wall; others in crates on the flagstones. Jay touched the bottles fleetingly as he passed, bringing his face very close, as if to catch the scent of those imprisoned summers. Two or three times he pulled out a bottle and turned it in his hands before replacing it in the rack. He moved aimlessly, without direction, liking the dampness of the cellar and the silence. Even the sound of the London traffic was stilled here, and for a moment he seemed tempted simply to lie down on the smooth, cool floor and go to sleep, perhaps for ever. No-one would look for him here. But instead he felt very wide awake, very alert, as if the silence had cleared his head. There was a charged atmosphere in spite of the stillness, like something waiting to happen. The new bottles were in a box at the back of the cellar. A 16 broken ladder had been laid across the top of it, and he moved this aside, dragging the box out with an effort across the flagstones. He lifted out a bottle at random and held it up to the light to decipher the label. Its contents looked inky-red, with a deep layer of sediment at the base. For a moment he imagined he saw something else inside there, a shape, but it was only sediment. Somewhere above him, in the kitchen, the nostalgia station was still tuned to 1975 - Christmas now, 'Bohemian Rhapsody', faint but audible through the floor - and he shivered. Back in the kitchen he examined the bottle with some curiosity — he had barely glanced at it since he brought it back six weeks before - the wax seal at the neck, the brown cord, the handwritten label - "Specials 1975' - the glass grimed with the dust of Joe's root cellar. He wondered why he had brought it back from the wreckage. Nostalgia maybe, though his feelings for Joe were still too mixed for that luxury. Anger, confusion, longing washed over him in hot-cold waves. Old man. Wish you were here. Inside the bottle something leaped and capered. The bottles in the cellar rattled and danced in reply. Sometimes it happens by accident. After years of waiting - for a correct planetary alignment, a chance meeting, a sudden inspiration - the right circumstances occasionally happen of their own accord, slyly, without fanfare, without warning. Jay thinks of it as destiny. Joe called it magic. But sometimes all it is is simple chemistry, something in the air, a single action to bring something which has long remained inert into sudden, inevitable change. Layman's alchemy, Joe called it. The magic of everyday things. Jay Mackintosh reached for a knife to cut the seal. HAD WITHSTOOD THE YEARS. HIS KNIFE SLICED IT OPEN AND THE irk was still intact beneath. For a moment the scent was i immediately pungent that all he could do was endure it, ieth clenched, as it worked its will on him. It smelt earthy ad a little sour, like the canal in midsummer, with a larpness which reminded him of the vegetable-cutter ad the gleeful tang of fresh-dug potatoes. For a second ie illusion was so strong that he was actually there in that anished place, with Joe leaning on his spade and the radio 'edged in a fork in a tree, playing 'Send in the Clowns' or 'm Not in Love'. A sudden overwhelming excitement took old of him and he poured a small quantity of the wine into glass, trying not to spill the liquid in his eagerness. It was usky-pink, like papaya juice, and it seemed to climb the ;des of the glass in a frenzy of anticipation, as if something iside it were alive and anxious to work its magic on his esh. He looked at it with mingled distrust and longing. A art of him wanted to drink it - had waited years for just lis moment - but all the same he hesitated. The liquid in ie glass was murky and flecked with flakes of brownish latter, like rust. He suddenly imagined himself drinking, Poking, writhing on the tiles in agony. The glass halted alfway to his mouth. He looked at the liquid again. The movement he thought e saw had ceased. The scent was faintly sweetish, med;inal, like cough mixture. Once again he wondered why he 18 had brought the bottle with him. There was no such thing as magic. It was something else Joe had made him believe; one more of the old fraud's trickeries. But there was something in the glass, his mind insisted. Something special. His concentration was such that he didn't hear Kerry come in behind him. 'Oh, so you're not working.' Her voice was clear, with just enough of an Irish accent to guard against accusations of having a privileged background. 'You know, if you were planning on getting pissed you could at least have come to the party with me. It would have been a wonderful opportunity for you to meet people.' She put special emphasis on the word wonderful, extending the first syllable to three times its natural length. Jay looked back at her, the wineglass still in his hand. His voice was mocking. 'Oh, you know. I'm always meeting wonderful people. All literary people are wonderful. What I really like is when one of your bright young things comes up to me at one of these wonderful parties and says, "Hey, didn't you used to be Jay somebody, the guy who wrote that wonderful book?"' Kerry crossed the room, her perspex heels tapping coolly against the tiles, and poured herself a glass of Stolichnaya. "Now you're being childish as well as antisocial. If you actually made the effort to write something serious once in a while, instead of wasting your talent on rubbish--' 'Wonderful.' Jay grinned and tipped the wineglass at her. In the cellar the remaining bottles rattled boisterously, as if in anticipation. Kerry stopped, listened. 'Did you hear something?' Jay shook his head, still grinning. She came closer, looked at the glass in his hand and the bottle still standing on the table. 'What is that stuff, anyway?' Her voice was as sharp and clear as her icicle heels. "Some kind of cocktail? It smells disgusting.' 'It's Joe's wine. One of the six.' He turned the bottle around to see the label. 'Jackapple, 1975. A wonderful vintage.' Beside us and around us the bottles were in gleeful ferment. We could hear them whispering, singing, calling, capering. Their laughter was infectious, reckless, a call to arms. Chateau-Chalon muttered stolid disapproval, but in that raucous, carnival atmosphere his voice sounded like envy. I found myself joining in, rattling in my crate like a common milk bottle, delirious with anticipation, with the knowledge that something was on the way. 'Ugh! God! Don't drink it. It's bound to be off.' Kerry gave a forced laugh. 'Besides, it's revolting. It's like necrophilia, or something. I can't imagine why you wanted to bring it home at all, in the circumstances.' 'I was planning to drink it, darling, not fuck it,' muttered Jay- 'What?' 'Nothing.' 'Please, darling. Pour it away. It's probably got all kinds of disgusting bacteria in it. Or worse. Antifreeze or something. You know what the old boy was like.' Her voice was cajoling. 'I'll get you a glass of Stolly instead, OK?' 'Kerry, stop talking like my mother.' 'Then stop behaving like a child. Why can't you just grow up, for God's sake?' It was a perpetual refrain. Stubbornly: 'The wine was Joe's. I don't expect you to understand.' She sighed, exasperated, and turned away. 'Oh, please yourself. You always do. The way you've fixated on that old bugger for all these years, anyone would think he was your father or something, instead of some dirty old git with an eye for little boys. Go on, be a mature adult and poison yourself. If you die they might even do a commemorative reprint of Jackapple Joe, and I could sell my story to the TLS-- But Jay was not listening. He lifted the glass to his face. 20 The scent hit him again, the dim cidery scent of Joe's house, with the incense burning and the tomato plants ripening in the kitchen window. For a moment he thought he heard something, a clatter and glitzy confusion of glass, like a chandelier falling onto a laid table. He took a mouthful. 'Cheers.' It tasted as dreadful as it did when he was a boy. There was no grape in this brew, simply a sweetish ferment of flavours, like a whiff of garbage. It smelt like the canal in summer and the derelict railway sidings. It had an acrid taste, like smoke and burning rubber, and yet it was evocative, catching at his throat and his memory, drawing out images he thought were lost for ever. He clenched his fists as the images assailed him, feeling suddenly lightheaded. 'Are you OK?' It was Kerry's voice, resonant, as if in a dream. She sounded irritated, though there was an anxious edge to her voice. 'Jay. I told you not to drink that stuff, are you all right?' He swallowed with an effort. 'I'm fine. Actually it's rather pleasant. Pert. Tart. Lovely body. Bit like you, Kes.' He broke off, coughing, but laughing at the same time. Kerry looked at him, unamused. 'I wish you wouldn't call me that. It isn't my name.' 'Neither is Kerry,' he pointed out maliciously. 'Oh well, if you're going to be vulgar I'm going to bed. Enjoy your vintage. Whatever turns you on.' The words were a challenge which Jay left unanswered, turning his back to the -door until she had gone. He was being selfish, he knew. But the wine had awakened something in him, something extraordinary, and he wanted to explore it further. He took another drink and found his palate was becoming accustomed to the wine's strange flavours. He could taste old fruit now, burnt to hard black sugar, he could smell the juice from the vegetable-cutter and hear Joe singing along to his old radio at the back of the allotment. Impatiently he drained the glass, tasting the 21 zesty heart of the wine, feeling his heart beating with renewed energy, pounding as if he had run a race. Below stairs the five remaining bottles rattled and shook in a frenzy of exuberance. Now his head felt clear, his stomach level. He tried for a moment to identify the sensation he felt and eventually recognized it as joy. 22 4 Pog Hill, Summer 1975 JACKAPPLE JOE. AS GOOD A NAME AS ANY. HE INTRODUCED HIMSELF as Joe Cox, with a slanted smile, as if to challenge disbelief, but even in those days it might have been anything, changing with the seasons and his changing address. 'We could be cousins, you and me,' he said on that first day, as Jay watched him in wary fascination from the top of the wall. The vegetable-cutter whirred and clattered, throwing out pieces of sour-sweet fruit or vegetable into the bucket at his feet. 'Cox and Mackintosh. Both apples, aren't we? That must make us nearly family, I reckon.' His accent was exotic, bewildering, and Jay stared at him without comprehension. Joe shook his head, grinning. 'Didn't know you was called after an apple, did you? It's a goodun, an American red apple. Plenty of taste. Got a young tree meself, back there.' He jerked his head towards the back of the house. 'But it's not taken that well. I reckon it needs a sight more time to get comfortable.' Jay continued to watch him with all the wary cynicism of his twelve years, alert for any sign of mockery. "You make it sound like they've got feelings.' Joe looked at him. 'Course they ave. Just like anythin else that grows.' 23 The boy watched the rotating blades of the vegetable- cutter in fascination. The funnel-shaped machine bucked and roared between Joe's hands, spitting out chunks of white and pink and blue and yellow flesh. 'What are you doing?' 'What's it look like?' The old man jerked his chin at a cardboard box lying by the wall which separated them. 'Pass us them jacks over there, will you?' 'Jacks?' A slight gesture of impatience towards the box: 'Jack- apples.' Jay glanced down. The drop was easy, five feet at the most, but the garden was enclosed, with only the scrub of waste ground and the railway line at his back, and his city upbringing had taught him wariness of strangers. Joe grinned. 'I'll not bite, lad,' he said mildly. Annoyed, Jay dropped down into the garden. The jackapples were long and red and oddly pointed at one end. One or two had been cut open as Joe dug them up, showing flesh which looked tropically pink in the sun. The boy staggered a little under the weight of the box. 'Watch your step,' called Joe. 'Don't drop em. They'll bruise.' 'But these are just potatoes.' 'Aye,' said Joe, without taking his eyes from the vegetable-cutter. 'I thought you said they were apples, or something.' 'Jacks. Spuds. Taters. Jackapples. Poms de tai'r.' 'Don't look like much to me,' said Jay. Joe shook his head and began to feed the roots into the vegetable-cutter. Their scent was sweetish, like papaya. 'I brought these home from South America after the war,' he said. 'Grew em from seed right here in my back garden. Took me five years just to get the soil right. If you want roasters, you grow King Edwards. If you want salads, it's your Charlottes or your Jerseys. If it's chippers you're after, then it's your Maris Piper. But these' - he reached down to 24 pick one up, rubbing the blackened ball of his thumb lovingly across the pinkish skin - 'Older than New York, so old it doesn't even have an English name. Seed more precious than powdered gold. These aren't just potatoes, lad. These are little nuggets of lost time, from when people still believed in magic and when half the world was still blank on the maps. You don't make chips from these.' He shook his head again, his eyes brimful of laughter under the thick grey brows. These are me Specials.' Jay watched him cautiously, unsure whether he was mad or simply making fun. 'So what are you making?' he asked at last. Joe tossed the last jackapple into the cutter and grinned. 'Wine, lad. Wine.' That was the summer of '75. Jay was nearly thirteen. Eyes narrow, mouth tight, face a white-knuckle fist closing over something too secret to be examined. Lately a resident of the Moorlands School in Leeds, now with eight weeks of holidays stretching strange and empty till the next term. He hated it here already. This place with its bleak and hazy skyline, its blue-black hills crawling with yellow loaders, its slums and pit houses and its people, with their sharp faces and flat Northern voices. It would be all right, his mother told him. He would like Kirby Monckton. He would enjoy the change. Everything would be sorted out. But Jay knew better. The gulf of his parents' divorce opened up beneath him, and he hated them, hated the place to which they had sent him, hated the gleaming new five-speed Raleigh bike delivered that- morning for his birthday bribery as contemptible as the message which accompanied it - 'With love from Mum and Dad' - so falsely normal, as if the world wasn't coming softly apart around him. His rage was cold, glassy, cutting him from the rest of the world so that sounds became muffled and people were walking trees. Rage was inside him, seething, waiting desperately for something to happen. They had never been a close family. Until that summer he had only seen his grandparents half a dozen times, at Christmases or birthdays, and they treated him with dutiful, distant affection. His grandmother was frail and elegant, like the china she loved and which adorned every available surface. His grandfather was bluff and soldierly and shot grouse without a licence on the nearby moors. Both deplored the trade unions, the rise of the working class, rock music, men with long hair and the admission of women into Oxford. Jay soon understood that if he washed his hands before meals and seemed to listen to everything they said he could enjoy unlimited freedom. That was how he met Joe. Kirby Monckton is a small Northern town similar to many others. Built on coal mining, it was in decline even then, with two of the four pits shut and the remaining two struggling. Where the pits have closed, the villages built to supply them with labour died, too, leaving rows of pit houses staggering towards dereliction, half of them empty, windows boarded up, gardens piled with refuse and weeds. The centre was little better - a row of shops, a few pubs, a mini-market, a police station with a grille across its window. To one side, the river, the railway, the old canal. To the other, a ridge of hills reaching towards the feet of the Pennines. This was Upper Kirby, where Jay's grandparents lived. Looking towards the hills, over fields and woodland, it is almost possible to imagine that there have never been any mines. This is the acceptable face of Kirby Monckton, where terraces are referred to as mews cottages. At its highest point you can see the town itself a few miles away, a smear of yellowish smoke across an uneven horizon, with pylons marching across the fields towards the slaty scar of the open-cast mine, but the hollow is relentlessly charming, shielded by the ridge. The houses are for the most part larger, more elaborate here. Deep Victorian terraces of mellow Yorkshire stone, with leaded panes and mock- Gothic doorways, and huge secluded gardens with fruit- trees en espah'er and smooth, well-tended lawns. 26 Jay was impervious to these charms. To his London- accustomed eyes Upper Kirby looked precarious, balanced on the stony edge of the moor. The spaces - the distances between buildings - dizzied him. The scarred mess of Lower Monckton and Nether Edge looked deserted in its smoke, like something during the war. He missed London's cinemas and theatres, the record shops, the galleries, the museums. He missed the people. He missed the familiar accents of London, the sound of traffic and the smells. He rode his bike for miles along the unfamiliar deserted roads, hating everything he saw. His grandparents never interfered. They approved of outdoor pastimes, never noticing that he returned home trembling and exhausted with rage every afternoon. The boy was always polite, always well groomed. He listened intelligently and with interest to what they said. He cultivated a boyish cheeriness. He was the cleanest-cut comic- book schoolboy hero imaginable, and he revelled sourly in his deception. Joe lived on Pog Hill Lane, one of a row of uneven terraces backing on to the railway half a mile from the station. Jay had already been there twice before, leaving his bike in a stand of bushes and climbing up the banking to reach the railway bridge. On the far side there were fields reaching down to the river, and beyond that lay the open-cast mine, the sound of its machinery a distant drone on the wind. For a couple of miles an old canal ran almost parallel to the railway, and there the stagnant air was green with flies and hot with the scent of ash-and greenery. A bridle path ran between the canal and the railway, overhung with tree branches. Nether Edge to the townspeople, it was almost always deserted. That was why it first attracted him. He bought a packet of cigarettes and a copy of the Eagle from the station newspaper stand and cycled down towards the canal. Then, leaving his bike safely concealed in the undergrowth, he walked along the canal path, pushing his way through great drifts of ripe willowherb and sending clouds of white seeds into the air. When he reached the old lock, he sat down on the stones and smoked as he watched the railway, occasionally counting the coal trucks as they passed, or making faces at the passenger trains as they clattered to their distant, envied destinations. He threw stones into the clotted canal. A few times he walked all the way to the river and made dams with turf and the accumulated garbage it had brought with it: car tyres, branches, railway sleepers and once a whole mattress with the springs poking out of the ticking. That was really how it began; the place got a hold on him somehow. Perhaps because it was a secret place, an old, forbidden place. Jay began to explore; there were mysterious raised concrete- and-metal cylinders, which Joe later identified as capped pitheads and which gave out strange resonant breathing sounds if you went close. A flooded mineshaft, an abandoned coal truck, the remains of a barge. It was an ugly, perhaps a dangerous place, but it was a place of great sadness, too, and it attracted him in a way he could neither combat nor understand. His parents would have been horrified at his going there, and that, too, contributed to its appeal. So he explored; here an ash pit filled with ancient shards of crockery, there a spill of exotic, discarded treasures -- bundles of comics and magazines, as yet unspoiled by rain; scrap metal; the hulk of a car, an old Ford Galaxie, a small elder tree growing out of its roof like a novelty aerial; a dead television. Living alongside a railway, Joe once told him, is like living on a beach; the tide brings new jetsam every day. At first he hated it. He couldn't imagine why he went there at all. He would set out with the intention of taking a quite different route and still find himself in Nether Edge, between the railway and the canal, the sound of distant machinery droning in his ears and the whitish summer sky pushing down the top of his head like a hot cap. A lonely, derelict place. But his, nevertheless. Throughout all that long, strange summer, his. Or so he assumed. 28 London, Spring 1999 HE WOKE UP LATE THE NEXT DAY TO FIND KERRY ALREADY GONE, leaving a short note, through which the disapproval showed like a watermark. He read it idly, without interest, and tried to remember what had happened the night before. J - Don't forget the reception at Spy's tonight it's very important for you to be there! Wear the Armani - K. His head ached, and he made strong coffee and listened to the radio as he drank it. He didn't remember a great deal - so much of his life seemed to be like this now, a blur of days without anything to define them from each other, like episodes of a soap he watched out of habit, even though none of the characters interested him. The day stretched out in front of him like an empty road in the desert. He had a tutorial that evening, but was already considering whether to miss it. It was all right; he'd missed tutorials before. It was almost expected of him now. Artistic temperament. He grinned briefly at the irony. The bottle of Joe's wine was standing where he had left it on the table. He was surprised to see it still over half full. Such a small quantity seemed too little to account for his pounding hangover and the dreams which finally chased him into sleep as dawn bled into the sky. The scent from the empty glass was faint but discernible, a sweetly medicinal scent, soothing. He poured a glassful. 'Hair of the dog,' he muttered. This morning it was only vaguely unpleasant, almost tasteless. A memory stirred at the back of his mind, but it was too distant to identify. The door rattled suddenly and he turned round, feeling obscurely guilty, as if caught out. But it was only the post, half pushed through the letter box and spilling onto the mat. Through the glass door a square of sunlight illuminated the top envelope, as if marking it for his special attention. Probably junk mail, he told himself. Nowadays he rarely ever received anything else. And yet, by a trick of the light, the envelope seemed to glow, giving the single word stencilled across it a new, brilliant significance: 'ESCAPE'. As if a door could be opened from the London dawn into another world, where every possibility remained to be played out. He stooped to pick up the bright rectangle, opened it. His first thought was that it was indeed junk mail. A cheaply produced brochure entitled HOLIDAY HIDEAWAYS, GREAT ESCAPES, blurry snapshots of farmhouses and gites interspersed with blocks of text. 'This charming cottage only five miles from Avignon ... This large converted farmhouse in its own grounds ... This sixteenth-century barn in the heart of the Dordogne...' The pictures were all the same: rustic cottages under Disney-coloured skies, women in headscarves and white coiffes, men in berets herding goats onto impossibly green mountainsides. He dropped the brochure onto the table with an odd sense of disappointment, feeling cheated, as if something as yet unknown had passed him by. Then he caught sight of the picture. The brochure had fallen open at the centre page, a double-page spread of a house which looked curiously familiar. A large square-built house, with pinkish, faded walls and a red-tiled roof. Beneath it, the words, 'Chateau Foudouin, Lot-et-Garonne.' Above it, in red, like a neon marker, 'FOR SALE'. The surprise at seeing it there, so unexpectedly, made his heart lurch. A sign, he told himself. Coming now, at this moment, it had to be. It had to be a sign. He looked at the picture for a long time. It was not exactly Joe's chtteau, he decided after some scrutiny. The lines of the building looked slightly different, the roof more sloping, the windows narrower and set deeper into the stone. And it was not in Bordeaux but in the next county altogether, a few miles from Agen, on a small offshoot of the river Garonne, the Tannes. Still, it was close. Very close. It couldn't be a coincidence. Below stairs the strangers had subsided into eerie, expectant silence. Not a whisper, not a rattle or a hiss escaped them. Jay looked at the picture intently. Above it the neon sign flashed relentlessly, enticingly. FOR SALE.. He reached for the bottle and poured himself another glass. 30 31 6 Pog Hill, July 1975 THAT SUMMER MOST OF lAY'S LIFE WENT ON UNDERCOVER, LIKE a secret war. On rainy days he sat in his room and read the Dondy or the/{ogle and listened to the radio with the volume turned right down, pretendin§ he was doing homework, or wrote b]isteringly intense short stories with titles like Flesh-Eating Warriors of the Forbidden City' or The Man who Chased the Lightning'. He was never short of money. On Sundays he earned twenty pee washing his grandfather's green Austin, the same for mowing the lawn. His parents' brief, infrequent letters were invariably accompanied by a postal order, and he spent this unaccustomed wealth with gleeful, gloating defiance. Comics, bubble gum, cigarettes if he could get them; anything which might have incurred the disapproval of his parents attracted him. He kept his treasures in a biscuit tin by the canal, telling his grandparents he put his money in the bank. Technically this was not a lie. A loose stone by the remains of the old lock, worked carefully free, left a space maybe fifteen inches square, into which the tin could be slotted. A square of turf, cut from the banking with a penknife, concealed the entrance. For the first fortnight of the holiday he went there almost every day, 32 basking on the flat stones of the jetty and smoking, reading, writing stories in one of an endless series of close-scripted notebooks, or playing his radio at full volume into the bright sooty air. His memories of that summer were illumined in sound: Pete Wingfield singing Eighteen with a Bullet', or Tammy Winette and 'D.I.V.O.R.C.E.'. He sang along much of the time, or played air guitar and pulled faces at an invisible audience. It was only later that he realized how reckless he had been. The dump was easily within earshot of the canal, and Zeth and his gang might have come upon him at any time during those two weeks. They might have found him snoozing on the bank or cornered in the ash pit - or worse, with the treasure box left carelessly open. Jay never considered that there might be other boys in his territory. Never imagined that this might already be someone's territory, someone tougher and older and altogether more streetwise than himself. He had never been in a fight. The Moorlands School discouraged such marks of poor breeding. His few London friends were distant and reserved, ballet-class and pony girls, army-cadet boys with perfect teeth. Jay never quite fitted in. His mother was an actress whose career had dead-ended in a TV sitcom called Oooh! Mother! about a widower caring for his three teenage children, lay's mother played the part of the interfering landlady, Mrs Dykes, and much of his adolescence was made hideous by people stopping them in the street and yelling her screen catchphrase, 'Oooh, am I interruptin' somethin'?' lay's father, the Bread' Baron who made his fortune with Trimble, a well-known slimmers' loaf, had never quite made enough money to make up for his lack of pedigree, hiding his insecurity behind a facade of bluff, cigar-smoking cheer. He, too, embarrassed lay, with his East-End vowels and shiny suits. Jay had always seen himself as a different species, as something hardier, nearer to the raw. He couldn't have been more wrong. There were three of them. Taller than lay and older 33 fourteen, maybe fifteen - with a peculiar swing to their walk as they strolled along the canal towpath, a cocky strut which marked the territory as their own. Instinctively Jay snapped off his radio and crouched in the shadows, resentful of the proprietary air with which they lolled on the jetty, one crouching to poke at something in the water with a stick, another popping a match against his ieans to light up a cigarette. He watched them warily from the shadow of a tree, hackles pricking. They looked dangerous, clannish in their jeans, zip-up boos and cut-off T-shirts, members of a tribe to which Jay could never belong. One of them - a tall, lanky boy - was carrying an air rifle, slung carelessly into the crook of his arm. His face was broad and angry with spots at the iawline. His eyes were ball-bearings. One of the others had his back half turned, so that Jay could see the roll of his paunch poking out from beneath his T-shirt, and the broad band of his underpants above his low-slung jeans. The underpants had little aeroplanes on them, and for some reason that made Jay want to laugh, silently at first into his curled fist, then with a high, helpless squawk of mirth. Aeroplanes turned round at once, his face slack with surprise. For a second the two boys faced each other. Then he shot out his hand and grabbed Jay by the shirt. 'What the fuck thar doin ere?' The other two were watching with hostile curiosity. The third boy - a spidery youth with extravagant sideburns took a step forwards and poked Jay hard in the chest with an extended knuckle. 'Asr thee a question, dinty?' Their language sounded alien, almost incomprehensible, a cartoonish babble of vowels, and Jay found himself smiling again, close to laughter, unable to help himself. 'Atha deaf as well as daft?' demanded Sideburns. 'I'm sorry,' said Jay, trying to pull free. 'You just came out of nowhere. I didn't mean to scare you.' The three looked at him with even greater intensity. Their eyes looked the same non-colour as the sky, a peculiar shifting grey. The tall boy stroked the butt of his rifle in a suggestive gesture. His expression was curious, almost amused. Jay noticed he had tattooed letters on the back of his hand, one letter pricked out across each of his knuckles to form a name or nickname: ZETH. This was no professional job, he understood. The boy had written it himself, using a compass and a bottle of ink. Jay had a sudden, startling vision of him doing it, with a dogged grimace of satisfaction, one sunny afternoon at the back of a maths or English class, with the teacher pretending not to see, even though Zeth wasn't bothering to hide. It was easier that way, the teacher thought. Safer. 'Scare us?' The bright ball-bearing eyes rolled in counterfeit humour. Sideburns sniggered. 'Astha gotta fag, mate?' Zeth's voice was still light, but Jay noticed Aeroplanes had not yet released his shirt. 'A cigarette?' He began to fumble in his pocket, clumsy with the need to get away, and pulled out a packet of Player's. 'Sure. Have one.' Zeth took two and passed the packet to Sideburns, then to Aeroplanes. 'Hey, keep the packet,' said Jay, beginning to feel lightheaded. 'Matches?' He pulled the box from his jeans and held it out. 'Keep them, too.' Aeroplanes winked as he lit up, a somehow greasy, appraising look. The other two drew a little closer. 'Astha got any spice, anall?' asked Zeth pleasantly. Aeroplanes began to finger nimbly through Jay's pockets. It was already too late to struggle. A minute earlier and he might have had the advantage of surprise, might have been able to duck between them towards the jetty and up onto the railway. Now it was too late. They had scented fear. Eager hands searched Jay's pockets with greedy, delicate fingers. Chewing gum, a couple of wrapped sweets, coins, all the contents of his pockets rolled into their cupped hands. 'Hey, get off there! Those things are mine!' But his voice was trembling. He tried to tell himself that it didn't matter, that he could let them have the stuff- most of it was worthless, anyway - but that didn't stop the bleak, hateful feeling of helplessness, of shame. Then Zeth picked up the radio. 'Nice,' he commented. For a moment Jay had forgotten all about it; lying in the long grass under the shade of the trees it was almost invisible. A trick of the light, maybe, a freak reflection on the chrome, or just plain bad luck, but Zeth saw it, bent and picked it up. 'That's mine,' said Jay, almost inaudibly, his mouth filled with needles. Zeth looked at him and grinned. 'Mine,' Jay whispered. 'Course it is, mate,' said Zeth amicably and held it out. Their eyes met above the radio. Jay put out his hand, almost pleadingly. Zeth withdrew the radio, just a little, then drop-kicked it with incredible speed and accuracy over their heads in a wide, gleaming arc into the air. For a second it gleamed there, like a miniature spaceship, then it crashed on the stone lip of the jetty and smattered into a hundred plastic and chrome fragments. 'And it's a goo-aal!' shrieked Sideburns, beginning to dance and caper amongst the wreckage. Aeroplanes chuckled sweatily. But Zeth just looked at Jay with the same curious expression, one hand resting on the butt of his air rifle, his eyes cool and oddly sympathetic, as if to say, What now, mate? What now? What now? Jay could feel his eyes getting hotter and hotter, as if the tears gathering there were made of molten lead, and he struggled to stop them from spilling over onto his cheeks. He glanced at the pieces of the radio twinkling on the stones and tried to tell himself it didn't matter. It was just an old radio, nothing worth getting beaten up for, but the rage inside him wouldn't listen. He took a step towards the lock, then turned back, without even thinking, and swung as hard as he could towards Zeth's patient, amused face. Aeroplanes and Sideburns were on Jay at once, punching and kicking, but not before he had launched a good solid kick into the pit of Zeth's stomach, which connected as his first awkward punch had not. Zeth gave a wheezing scream and curled up on the ground. Aeroplanes tried to grab Jay again, but he was slippery with sweat and managed to duck under the other boy's arm. Skidding on the remains of his broken radio he made for the path, dodged Sideburns, slid down the banking and across the bridle path towards the railway bridge. Someone was shouting after him, but distance and the thick local dialect made the words indistinguishable, though the threat was clear. When he reached the top of the banking, Jay kissed his middle finger at the three distant figures, dug his bike out of the undergrowth where he had hidden it, and in a minute was riding back towards Monckton. His nose was bleeding and his hands were torn from his dive through the bushes, but he was singing inside with triumph. Even his dismay over the loss of the radio was temporarily forgotten. Perhaps it was that wild, almost magical feeling that drew him to Joe's house that day. He told himself later that it was simply chance, that there was nothing in his mind at all but the desire to ride into the wind, but he thought later that it might have been some kind of crazy predestination which pulled him there, a kind of call. He felt it, too, a wordless voice of exceptional clarity and tone, and for a moment he saw the street sign - Poc HILL LANE -- light up briefly in the glow of the reddening sun, as if somehow marked for his attention, so that instead of cycling past the narrow mouth of the street, as he had done so many times before, he stopped and wheeled his bike slowly back to stare over the brick wall, where an old man was cutting jackapples to make wine. ture, touching it, folding and unfolding the thin paper. He wanted to show other people. He wanted to be there now, to take possession, even though the paperwork was only half completed. His bank, his accountant, his solicitors could deal with the formalities. The signing of the papers was merely an afterthought. The essentials were already in motion. A few phone calls and it could all be arranged. A flight to Paris. A train to Marseilles. By tomorrow he could be there. London, March 1999 THE AGENT MUST HAVE SCENTED HIS EAGERNESS. THERE WAS already a bid on the house, he said. A little below the asking price. The contracts had already been drawn up. But if Jay was interested there were other properties available. The information, true or false, made Jay reckless. It had to be this house, he insisted. This house. Now. In cash, if they liked. A discreet phone call. Then another. Rapid French into the mouthpiece. Someone brought coffee and Italian pastries from across the road as they waited. Jay suggested another price, somewhat higher than the existing offer. He heard the voice on the other end of the line rise by half an octave. He toasted them in caf -latte. It was so easy, buying a house. A few hours' wait, a little paperwork and it was his. He reread the short paragraph under the picture, trying to translate the words into stone and mortar. Chateau Foudouin. It looked unreal, a postcard from the past. He tried to imagine standing outside the door, touching the pink stone, looking over the vineyard towards the lake. Joe's dream, he told himself dimly, their dream fulfilled at last. It had to be fate. It had to be. And now he was fourteen again, gloating over his pic 8 Pog Hill, July 1975 JOE'S HOUSE WAS A DARK, CROOKED TERRACE, LIKE MANY OF the houses which lined the railway. The front gave directly on to the street, with only a low wall and a window box between the front door and the pavement. The back was all crowded little yards hung with washing, a shanty town of homemade rabbit hutches, hen houses and pigeon lofts. This side looked over the railway, a steep banking sheared away to form a cutting through which the trains passed. The road went over a bridge at that point, and from the back of Joe's garden you could see the red light of the railway signal, like a beacon in the distance. You could see Nether Edge, too, and the dim grey flanks of the slag heap beyond the fields. Staggering unevenly down the steep little lane, those few houses overlooked the whole of Jay's territory. Someone was singing in a nearby garden, an old lady by the sound of it, in a sweetly quavering voice. Somebody else was hammering wood, a comforting, primitive sound. 'D'you want a drink?' Joe nodded easily in the direction of the house. 'You look as if you wouldn't turn one down.' Jay glanced towards the house, suddenly aware of his torn jeans and the dried blood on his nose and upper lip. His mouth was dry. 'OK.' It was cool inside the house. Jay followed the old man through to the kitchen, a large bare room with clean wooden floorboards and a large pine table, scarred with the marks of many knives. There were no curtains at the window, but the entire window ledge was filled with leggy green plants, which formed a lush screen for the sunlight. The plants had a pleasant, earthy smell which filled the room. 'These are me toms,' remarked Joe, opening the larder, and Jay saw that there were indeed tomatoes growing amongst the warm leaves - small yellow ones, large misshapen red ones, or striped orange and green ones, like croaker marbles. There were more plants in pots on the floor, lining the walls and growing against the doorpost. To the side of the room a number of wooden crates contained fruit and vegetables, all arranged individually to avoid bruising. 'Nice plants,' he said, not really meaning it. Joe shot him a satirical look. 'You've got to talk to em if you want em to grow. And tickle em,' he added, indicating a long cane propped up against the bare wall. There was a rabbit's tail tied to its extremity. 'This is me ticklin stick, see? Very ticklish, toms.' Jay looked at him blankly. 'Looks like you ran into some trouble back there,' said Joe, opening a door at the far side of the room to reveal a big larder. 'Bin in a fight, or summat.' Guardedly Jay told him. When he got to the part where Zeth broke the radio he felt his voice jump into a higher register, sounding childish and close to tears. He stopped, flushing furiously. Joe didn't seem to notice. He reached into the larder, picking out a bottle of dark-red liquid and a couple of glasses. 'You get some of this down yet,' said Joe, pouring some out. It smelt fruity but unfamiliar, yeasty, like beer, but with a deceptive sweetness. Jay looked at it with suspicion. 'Is it wine?' he asked doubtfully. 40 41 Joe nodded. 'Blackbry,' he said, drinking his with obvious relish. 'I don't think I'm supposed to--' began Jay, but Joe pushed the glass at him with an impatient gesture. 'Try it, lad,' he urged. 'Put some art in yew He tried it. Joe clapped him on the back until he stopped coughing, carefully removing the precious glass from the boy's hand before he spilled it. 'It's disgusting!' managed Jay between coughing jags. It certainly tasted like no wine he had ever tasted before. He was no stranger to wine - his parents often gave him wine with meals, and he had developed quite a fondness for some of the sweeter German whites, but this was a completely new experience. It tasted like earth and swamp water and fruit gone sour with age. Tannin furred his tongue. His throat burned. His eyes watered. Joe looked rather hurt. Then he laughed. 'Bit strong for yet, is it?' Jay nodded, still coughing. 'Aye, I shoulda known,' said Joe cheerily, turning back to the pantry. 'Takes a bit o gettin used to, I reckon. But it's got art,' he added fondly, replacing the bottle with care on the shelf. 'And that's what matters.' He turned round, this time with a bottle of Ben Shaw's Yellow Lemonade in one hand. 'Reckon this'll do yer better for now,' he said, pouring a glassful. 'And as for the other stuff, you'll grow into it soon enough.' He returned the wine bottle to the larder, hesitated, turned. 'I think I might be able to give you somethin for that other problem, if you'd like, though,' he said. 'Come with me.' Jay was not sure what he expected the old man to give him. Kung-fu lessons, perhaps, or a bazooka left over from some war, grenades, a Zulu spear from his travels, a special invincible drop kick learned from a master in Tibet, guaranteed never to fail. Instead Joe led him to the side of the house, where a small red flannel bag dangled from a nail protruding from the stone. He unhooked the bag, sniffed briefly at the contents and handed it over. 'Take it,' he urged. 'It'll last a while yet. I'll make some fresh for us later.' Jay stared at him. 'What is it?' he said at last. 'Just carry it with you,' said Joe. 'In yet pocket, if you like, or on a bitta string. You'll see. It'll help.' 'What's in it?' He was staring now, as if the old man were crazy. His suspicions, allayed for a moment, flared anew. 'Oh, this an that. Sandalwood. Lavender. Bit o High John the Conqueror. Trick I learned off of a lady in Haiti, years back. Works every time.' That was it, decided Jay. The old boy was definitely crazy. Harmless - he hoped - but crazy. He glanced uneasily at the blind expanse of garden at his back and wondered if he could make it to the wall in time if the old man turned violent. Joe just smiled. 'Try it,' he urged. 'Just carry it in yer pocket. Happen you'll even forget it's there.' Jay decided to humour him. 'OK. What's it supposed to do, then?' Joe smiled again. 'Praps nothin,' he said. 'Well, how will I know if it's worked?' insisted Jay. 'You'll know,' said Joe easily. 'Next time you go down Nether Edge.' 'There's no way I'm going down there again,' said Jay sharply. 'Not with those boys--' 'You goin to leave yet treasure chest for em to find, then?' He had a point. Jay had almost forgotten about the treasure box, still hidden in its secret place beneath the loose stone. His sudden dismay almost overshadowed the certainty that he had never mentioned the treasure box to Joe. 'Used to go down there when I were a lad,' said the old man blandly. 'There were a loose stone at the corner of the lock. Still there, is it?' Jay stared at him. 'How did you know?' he whispered. 'Know what?' asked Joe, with exaggerated innocence. 'What's tha mean? I'm only a miner's lad. I don't know owt.' Jay didn't go back to the canal that day. He was too confused by everything, his mind racing with fights and broken radios and Haitian witchcraft and Joe's bright, laughing eyes. Instead, he took his bike and rode slowly past the railway bridge three or four times, heart pounding, trying to find the courage to climb the banking. Eventually he rode home, depressed and dissatisfied, all his triumph evaporated. He imagined Zeth and his friends going through his treasures, rocking with dirty laughter, scattering comics and books, stuffing sweets and chocolate bars into their mouths, pocketing the money. Worse still, there were his notebooks in there, the stories and poems he'd written. Finally he rode home, jaw aching with rage, watched Saturday Night at the Movies and went to bed to a late, unsatisfying sleep, through which he ran ceaselessly from an unseen enemy while Joe's laughter rang in his ears. The next day he decided to stay at home. The red flannel bag sat on his bedside table like a mute challenge. Jay ignored it and tried to read, but all his best comics were still in the treasure box. The absence of the radio filled the air with a hostile silence. Outside the sun shone and there was just enough breeze to stop the air from scorching. It was going to be the most beautiful day of the summer. He arrived at the railway bridge in a kind of daze. He hadn't meant to go there; even as he pedalled towards town something inside him knew he was going to turn round, take a different route, leave the canal to Zeth and his gang-their territory now. Perhaps he would go to Joe's house - he hadn't asked him to come back, but he hadn't asked him to keep away, either, as if Jay's presence was a matter of indifference to him - or maybe drop by at the newsagent's and buy some smokes. Either way, he certainly wasn't going to go back to the canal. As he hid his bike in the familiar stand of willowherb, as he climbed the banking, he repeated it to himself. Only an idiot would risk that again. Joe's red flannel bag was in his jeans pocket. He could feel it, a soft ball no bigger than a rolled-up hanky. He wondered how a bag full of herbs was supposed to help him. He had opened it the previous night, laying the contents out on his bedside table. A few pieces of stick, some brownish powder and some bits of green-grey aromatic stuff filled the bag. A part of him had expected shrunken heads. It was a joke, Jay told himself fiercely. Just an old man having his fun. And yet the stubborn part of him, which wanted desperately to believe, just wouldn't leave the thing alone. What if there was magic in the bag, after all? Jay imagined himself holding out the charm, incanting a magical spell in a ringing voice, Zeth and his mates cowering ... The bag pressed comfortingly against his hip like a steadying hand. With a lurch of the heart, he began to make his way down the banking towards the canal. He probably wouldn't meet anyone, anyway. Wrong again. He crept along the bridle path, keeping to the shade of the trees, his sneakers silent against the baked yellow earth. He was shaking with adrenalin, ready to run at the slightest sound. A lird flapped noisily out of its reed bed as he passed and he froze, certain that an alarm had been given for miles around. Nothing. Jay was almost at the lock now, he could see the place in the banking where the treasure box was hidden. Pieces of broken plastic still littered the stones. He knelt down, removed the piece of turf which concealed the stone and began to work it out. He'd been imagining them for so long that for a second he was sure the sounds were in his head. But now he could see their dim shapes coming over from the ash-pit side of the canal, shielded by bushes. There was no time to run. Half a minute at most before they broke cover. The bridle path was wide open from here, too far from the railway bridge to be sure. In seconds he would be an open target. He realized there was only one place to hide. The canal itself. It was mostly dry, except in patches, choked with reeds and litter and a hundred years' worth of silt. The little jetty stood about four feet above it, and he might be hidden, at least for a while. Of course, as soon as they stepped out onto the jetty, or joined the path, or bent down to examine something on the surface of the greasy water . . . But there was no time to think of that now. Jay slid down from his kneeling position into the canal, pushing the treasure box back into place as he did so. For a moment he felt his feet slide into the mud without resistance, then he touched bottom, ankle-deep in the slime. It slid into his sneakers and oozed between his toes. Ignoring it, he crouched low, reeds tickling his face, determined to present as small a target as possible. Instinctively he looked for weapons: stones, cans, things to throw. If they saw him, surprise would be his only advantage. He'd forgotten about Joe's charm in his ieans pocket. It got pulled out somehow as he crouched in the mud, and he picked it up automatically, feeling suddenly scornful at himself. How on earth could he have believed that a bag of leaves and sticks could protect him? Why had he wanted to believe it? They were close now; ten feet away, he guessed. He could hear the sounds of their boots. Someone threw a bottle or a jar hard against the stones; it exploded, and he flinched as glass showered his head and shoulders. The decision to hide beneath their feet seemed ridiculous now; suicidal. All they had to do was look down and he was at their mercy. He should have run, he told himself bitterly, run when he had the chance. The footsteps came closer. Nine feet. Eight. Seven. Jay flattened his cheek against the wall's dank stones, trying to be the wall. Joe's charm was moist with sweat. Six feet. Five feet. Four. Voices - Sideburns' and Aeroplanes' - sounding agonizingly close. 'Tha dun't reckon he'll be back, then?' 'Will he heckers, like. He's a fuckin' dead man if he does.' That's me, thought Jay dreamily. They're talking about me. Three feet. Two feet. Zeth's voice, almost indifferent in its cool menace: 'I can wait.' Two feet. One. A shadow fell over him, pinning him to the ground. Jay felt his hackles rising. They were looking down, looking over the canal, and he didn't dare raise his head, though the need to know was like a terrible itch, like nettle-rash of the mind. He could feel their eyes on the nape of his neck, hear the sound of Zeth's smoker's-corner breathing. In a moment he wouldn't be able to bear it. He'd have to look up, have to look-- A stone plapped into a greasy puddle not two feet away. Jay could see it from the corner of his eye. Another stone. Plap. They had to be teasing him, he thought desperately. They had seen him and they were prolonging the moment, stifling mean laughter, silently picking up stones and missiles to throw. Or maybe Zeth had lifted his air rifle, his eyes pensive . . . But none of that happened. Just as he was about to look up, Jay heard the sound of their boots moving away. Another stone hit the mud and skidded towards him, making him flinch. Then their voices, already receding lazily towards the ash pit, someone saying something about looking for bottles for target practice. He waited, oddly reluctant to move. It was a ruse, he said to himself, a trick to make him break cover, there was no way they could have missed him. But the voices continued to recede, beyond the jetty, growing fainter as they took the overgrown path back towards the ash pit. The distant crack of the rifle. Laughter from behind the trees. It was impossible. They had to have seen him. But somehow . .. Carefully Jay pulled out the treasure box. The charm was black with the sweat from his hands. It worked, he told himself in astonishment. It was impossible, but it worked. 9 London, March 1999 'EVEN THE DULLEST AND COLDEST OF CHARACTERS', HE TOLD HIS evening students, 'may be humanized by giving him someone to love. A child, a lover, even, at a pinch, a dog.' Unless you're writing sci-fi, he thought, with a sudden grin, in which case you just give them yellow eyes. He perched on his desk, next to his bulging duffel bag, resisting the urge to touch it, to open it. The students looked at him with awed expressions. Some took notes. 'Even' writing laboriously, straining so as not to miss a single word- 'even... at pinch ... dog'. He taught them on Kerry's insistence, vaguely disliking their ambition, their slavish obedience to the rules. There were fifteen of them, dressed almost uniformly in black; earnest young men and intense young women, with cropped haircuts and eyebrow rings and clipped, public-school vowels. One of the women - so like Kerry as she was five years ago that they might have been sisters - was reading aloud a short story she had written, an exercise in characterization about a black single mother in a flat in Sheffield. Jay touched the Escape brochure in his pocket and tried to listen, but the girl's voice was no more than a drone, a slightly unpleasant, waspish buzz of interference. 48 From time to time he nodded, as if he were interested. He still felt slightly drunk. Since last night the world seemed to have shifted slightly, moving closer into focus. As if something he had been staring at for years without seeing it had suddenly come clear. The girl's voice droned on. She scowled as she read and kicked one foot complusively against the table leg. Jay stifled a yawn. She was so intense, he told himself. Intense and rather disgusting in her self-absorption, like an adolescent looking for blackheads. She used the word 'fuck' in every sentence, probably an attempt at authenticity. He felt the urge to laugh. She pronounced it 'fark'. He knew he wasn't drunk. He had finished the bottle hours ago - even then he had barely felt dizzy. After that day's business he had decided not to attend the tutorial, but went after all, suddenly appalled at the thought of going back to the house, to face the silent disapproval of Kerry's things. Killing time, he told himself silently. Killing time. Joe's wine really should have worn off, but still he felt oddly exhilarated. As if the normal running of things had been suspended for a day, like an unexpected holiday. Perhaps it came of thinking so much about Joe. The memories kept coming, too many to kep track, as if the bottle contained not wine, but time, uncoiling smokily, like a genie from the sour dregs, making him different, making him ... what? Crazy? Sane? He could not concentrate. The oldies station, permanently tuned to summers past, iangled aimlessly at the back of his mind. He might be thirteen again, head filled with visions and fantasies. Thirteen and in school, with the smells of summer coming through the window and Pog Hill Lane just around the corner and the thick tick of the clock counting time to the end of term. But he was the teacher now, he realized. The teacher going crazy with impatience for the end of school. The pupils wanted desperately to be there, drinking in every meaningless word. He was, after all, Jay Mackintosh, the 49 man who wrote Three Summers with ]ackapple Joe. The writer who never wrote. A teacher with nothing to teach. The thought made him laugh aloud. It must be something in the air, he thought. A whiff of happy gas, a scent of the outlands. The droning girl stopped reading - or maybe she had finished - and stared at him in hurt accusation. She looked so like Kerry that he couldn't help laughing again. 'I bought a house today,' he said suddenly. They stared at him without reaction. One young man in a Byron shirt wrote it down: 'Bought . . . house today'. Jay pulled out the brochure from his pocket and looked at it again. It was crumpled and grimy from so much handling, but at the sight of the picture his heart leaped. 'Not a house exactly,' he corrected himself. 'A chatto.' He laughed again. 'That's what Joe used to call it. His chatto in Bordo.' He opened the brochure and read it aloud. The students listened obediently. Byron Shirt made notes. Chateau Foudouin, Lot-et-Garonne. LansquenetsousTannes. This authentic eighteenth-century chateau in the heart of France's most popular wine-growing region includes vineyard, orchard, lake and extensive informal grounds, plus garage block, working distillery, five bedrooms, reception and living room, original oak-roof beaming. Suitable for conversion. 'Of course, it was a bit more than five thousand quid. Prices have gone up since nineteen seventy-five.' For a moment Jay wondered how many of those students were even born in 1975. They stared at him in silence, trying to understand. 'Excuse me, Dr Mackintosh.' It was the girl, still standing, now looking slightly belligerent. 'Can you explain what this has to do with my assignment?' Jay laughed again. Suddenly everything seemed amusing to him, unreal. He felt capable of doing anything, saying anything. Normality had been suspended. He told himself that this was what drunkenness was supposed to feel like. For all these years he had been doing it wrong. 'Of course.' He smiled at her. 'This' - holding up the leaflet so that everyone could see it -'This is the most original and evocative piece of creative writing I've seen from anyone since the beginning of the term.' Silence. Even Byron Shirt forgot his notes to gape at him. Jay beamed at the class, looking for a reaction. All were carefully expressionless. 'Why are you here?' he demanded suddenly. 'What are you expecting to get from these lessons?' He tried not to laugh at their appalled faces, at their polite blankness. He felt younger than any of them, a delinquent pupil addressing a roomful of stuffy, pedantic teachers. 'You're young. You're imaginative. Why the hell are you all writing about black single mothers and Glaswegian dope addicts and gratuitously using the word "fark"?' 'Well, sir, you set the assignment.' He had not won over the belligerent girl. She glared at him, clutching the despised assignment in her thih hand. 'Stuff the assignment!' he shouted merrily. 'You don't write because someone sets assignments! You write because you need to write, or because you hope someone will listen, or because writing will mend something broken inside you, or bring something back to life--' To emphasize his words he slapped at the heavy duffel bag standing on his desk, and it gave out the unmistakable sound of bottles clinking together. Some of the students looked at each other. Jay turned back to the class, feeling almost delirious. 'Where's the magic, that's what I want to know?' he asked. 'Where are the magic carpets and Haitian voodoo and lone gunslingers and naked ladies tied to railway lines? Where are the Indian trackers and the four-armed goddesses and the pirates and the giant apes? Where are the fucking space aliens?' There was a long silence. The students stared. The girl clutched her assignment so hard that the pages crumpled in her fist. Her face was white. 'You're pissed, aren't you?' Her voice was trembling with rage and disgust. 'That's why you're doing this to me. You've got to be pissed.' Jay laughed again. 'To paraphrase someone or other - Churchill it might have been - I may be pissed, but you'll still be ugly in the morning.' 'Fuck you!' she flung at him, pronouncing it properly this time, and stalked towards the door. 'Fuck you and your tutorial! I'm going to see the head of faculty about this!' For a second there was silence in her wake. Then the whisperings began. The room was awash with them. For a moment Jay was not sure whether these were real sounds or in his own head. The duffel bag clinked and clattered, rattled and rolled. The sound, imaginary or not, was overwhelming. Then Byron Shirt stood up and began to clap. A couple of the other students looked at him cautiously, then joined in. Several others joined them. Soon half the class was standing up, and most were clapping. They were still clapping as Jay picked up his duffel bag and turned towards the door, opened it, and left, closing it very gently behind him. The applause began to tail off, a number of voices murmuring confusion. From inside the duffel bag came the sound of bottles clinking together. Beside me, their work done, the Specials whispered their secrets. 10 Pog Hill, July 1975 HE WENT TO SEE JOE MANY MORE TIMES AFTER THAT, THOUGH HE never really got to like his wine. Joe showed no surprise when he arrived, but simply went to fetch the lemonade bottle, as if he had been expecting him. Nor did he ask about the charm. Jay asked him about it a few times, with the scepticism of one who secretly longs to be convinced, but the old man was evasive. 'Magic,' he said, wirking to prove it was a joke. 'Learned it off of a lady in Puerto Cruz.' 'I thought you said Haiti,' interrupted Jay. Joe shrugged. 'Same difference,' he said blandly. 'Worked, didn't it?' Jay had to admit that it worked. But it was just herbs, wasn't it? Herbs and bits of stick tied into a piece of cloth. And yet it had made him . .. Joe grinned. 'Nah, lad. Not invisible.' He pushed the bill of his cap up from his eyes. 'What then?' Joe looked at him. 'Some plants have properties, don't they?' he said. Jay nodded. 'Aspirin. Digitalis. Quinine. What woulda been called magic in the old days.' 'Medicines.' 'If you like. But a few hundred years ago there were no difference between magic and medicine. People just knew things. Believed things. Like chewin cloves to cure toothache, or pennyroyal for a sore throat, or rowan twigs to keep away evil spirits.' He glanced at the boy, as if to check for any sign of mockery. 'Properties,' he repeated. 'You can learn a lot if you travel enough, an you keep an open mind.' Jay was never certain later whether Joe was a true believer or whether his casual acceptance of magic was part of an elaborate plan to baffle him. Certainly the old man liked a joke. Jay's total ignorance of anything to do with gardening amused him, and for weeks he had the boy believing that a harmless stand of lemongrass was really a spaghetti tree - showing him the pale soft shoots of 'spaghetti' between the papery leaves - or that giant hogweeds could pull out their roots and walk, like triffids, or that you really could catch mice with valerian. Jay was gullible, and Joe delighted in finding new ways to catch him out. But in some things he was genuine. Maybe he had finally come to believe in his own fiction, after years of persuading others. His life was dominated by small rituals and superstitions, many taken from the battered copy of Culpeper's Herbal he kept by his bedside. He tickled tomatoes to make them grow. He played the radio constantly, claiming that the plants grew stronger with music. They preferred Radio I - he claimed leeks grew up to two inches bigger after Ed Stewart's Junior Choice - and Joe would be there, singing along to 'Disco Queen' or 'Stand By Your Man' as he worked, his old-crooner's voice rising solemnly above the redcurrant bushes as he picked and pruned. He always planted when there was a new moon and picked when the moon was full. He had a lunar chart in his greenhouse, each day marked in a dozen different inks: brown for potatoes, yellow for parsnips, orange for carrots. Watering, too, was done to an astrological schedule, as was the pruning and positioning of trees. And the funny thing was that the garden thrived on this eccentric treatment, growing strong, luxuriant rows of cabbages and turnips, carrots which were sweet and succulent and mysteriously free of slugs, trees whose branches fairly touched the ground under the weight of apples, pears, plums, cherries. Brightly coloured Oriental-looking signs Sellotaped to tree branches supposedly kept the birds from eating the fruit. Astrological symbols, painstakingly set into the gravel path and constructed from pieces of broken pottery and coloured glass, lined the garden beds. With Joe, Chinese medicine rubbed shoulders companionably with English folklore, chemistry with mysticism. For all Jay knew he may have believed it. Certainly, Jay believed him. At thirteen anything is possible. Everyday magic, that was what Joe called it. Layman's alchemy. No fuss, no fireworks. Just a mixture of herbs and roots, gathered under favourable planetary conditions. A muttered incantation, a sketched air symbol learned from gypsies on his travels. Perhaps Jay would not have accepted anything less prosaic. But in spite of his beliefs - maybe even because of them - there was something deeply restful about Joe, an inner calm which encircled him and which filled the boy with curiosity and a kind of envy. He seemed so tranquil, alone in his little house, surrounded by plants, and yet he had a remarkable sense of wonder and a gleeful fascination with the world. He was almost without education, having left school at twelve to go down the mines, but he was an endless source of information, anecdotes and folklore. As the summer passed, Jay found himself going to see Joe more and more often. He never asked questions, but allowed Jay to talk to him as he worked in his garden or his unofficial allotment on the railway bank, occasionally nodding to show that he'd heard, that he was listening. They snacked on slabs of fruit cake and thick bacon and egg sandwiches - no Trimble loaves for Joe - and drank mugs of strong, sweet tea. From time to time Jay brought cigarettes and sweets or magazines, and Joe accepted these gifts without especial gratitude and without surprise, as he did the boy's presence. As his shyness abated Jay even read him some of his stories, to which he listened in solemn and, he thought, appreciative silence. When Jay didn't want to talk he would tell the boy about himself, about his work in the mines and how he went to France during the war and was stationed in Dieppe for six months before a grenade blew two fingers off his hand - wiggling the reduced limb like an agile starfish then how, being unfit for service, it was the mines again for six years before he took off for America on a freighter. 'Cause you don't get to see much of the world from underground, lad, and I allus wanted to see what else there was. Have you done much travellin?' Jay told him he had been to Florida twice with his parents, to the south of France, to Tenerife and the Algarve for holidays. Joe dismissed these with a sniff. 'I mean proper travellin, lad. Not all that tourist-brochure rubbish, but the real thing. The Pont-Neuf in the early morning, when there's no-one up but the tramps coming out from under the bridges and out of the Metro, and the sun shinin on the water. New York. Central Park in spring. Rome. Ascension Island. Crossin the Italian alps by donkey. The vegetable caique from Crete. Himalayas on foot. Eatin rice off leaves in the Temple of Ganesh. Caught in a squall off the coast of New Guinea. Spring in Moscow and a whole winter of dogshit comin out under the meltin snow.' His eyes were gleaming. 'I've seen all of those things, lad,' he said softly. 'And more besides. I promised mesself I'd see everything.' Jay believed him. He had his maps on the walls, carefully annotated in his crabby handwriting and marked with coloured pins to show the places he had been. He told stories of brothels in Tokyo and shrines in Thailand, birds of paradise and banyan trees and standing stones at the end of the world. In the big converted spice cupboard next to his bed there were millions of seeds, painstakingly wrapped in squares of newspaper and labelled in his small careful script: tuberosa rubra maritima, tuberosa panax odarata, thousands and thousands of potatoes in their small compartments and, with them, carrots, squash, tomatoes, artichokes, leeks - over 300 species of onion alone sages, thymes, sweet bergamots and a bewildering treasure store of medicinal herbs and vegetables collected on his travels, every one named and packaged and ready for planting. Some of these plants were already extinct in the wild, Joe said, their properties forgotten by everyone but a handful of experts. Of the millions of varieties of fruit and vegetables once grown, only a few dozen were still commonly used. 'It's your intensive farming does it,' he would say, leaning on his spade for long enough to take a mouthful of tea from his mug. 'Too much specialization kills off variety. Sides, people don't want variety. They want everythin to look the same. Round red tomatoes, and never mind there's a long yeller un that'd taste a mile better if they gave it a try. Red uns look better on shelves.' He waved an arm vaguely over the allotment, indicating the neat rows of vegetables rising up the railway em[3ankment, the home-made cold frames in the derelict signal box, the fruit trees pegged out against the wall. 'There's things growin here that you wouldn't find anywhere else in the whole of England,' he said in a low voice, 'and there's seeds in that chest of mine that you might not find anywhere else in the whole world.' Jay listened to him in awe. He'd never been interested in plants before. He could hardly tell the difference between a Granny Smith and a Red Delicious. He knew potatoes, of course, but Joe's talk of blue jackapples and pink fir apples was beyond any experience of his. The thought that there were secrets, that arcane, forgotten things might be growing right there on the railway embankment with only an old man as their custodian fired Jay with an enthusiasm he had never imagined. Part of it was Joe, of course. His stories. His memories. The energy of the man himself. He began to see in Joe something he had never seen in anyone else. A vocation. A sense of purpose. 'Why did you come back, Joe?' he asked him one day. 'After all that travelling, why come back here?' Joe peered out gravely from under the bill of his miner's cap. 'It's part of me plan, lad,' he said. 'I'll not be here for ever. Some day I'll be off again. Some day soon.' 'Where?' 'I'll show you.' He reached into his workshirt and pulled out a battered leather wallet. Opening it, he unfolded a photograph clipped from a colour magazine, taking great care not to tear the whitened creases. It was a picture of a house. 'What's that?' Jay squinted at the picture. It looked ordinary enough, a big house built of faded pinkish stone, a long strip of land in front, with some kind of vegetation growing in ordered rows. Joe smoothed out the paper. 'That's me chatto, lad,' he said. 'In Bordo, it is, in France. Me chatto with the vineyard and me hundred-year-old orchard with peaches and almonds and apples and pears.' His eyes gleamed. 'When I've got me brass together I'll buy it - five grand would do it - and I'll make the best bloody wine in the south. Chatto Cox, 1975. How's that sound?' Jay watched him doubtfully. 'Sun shines all year round down in Bordo,' said Joe cheerily. 'Oranges in January. Peaches like cricket balls. Olives. Kiwi fruit. Almonds. Melons. And space. Miles and miles of orchards and vineyards, land cheap as dirt. Soil like fruit cake. Pretty girls treadin out the grapes with their bare feet. Paradise.' 'Five thousand pounds is a lot of money,' said Jay doubtfully. Joe tapped the side of his nose with his forefinger. 'I'll get there,' he said mysteriously. 'You want somethin badly enough, you allus get there in the end.' 'But you don't even speak French.' Joe's only response was a stream of sudden, incomprehensible gibberish, like no language Jay had ever heard before. 'Joe, I do French at school,' he told him. 'That's not anything like--' Joe looked at him indulgently. 'It's dialect, lad,' he said. 'Learned it off of a band of gypsies in Marseilles. Believe me, I'll fit right in there.' He folded the picture carefully away again and replaced it in his wallet. Jay gaped at him in awe, utterly convinced. 'You'll see what I mean one day, lad,' he said. 'Jus you wait.' 'Can I come with you?' Jay asked. 'Will you take me with you?' Joe considered it seriously, head to one side. 'I might, lad, if you want to come. I might anall.' 'Promise?' 'All right.' He grinned. 'It's a promise. Cox and Mackintosh, best bloody winemakers in Bordo. That do yer?' They toasted his dreams in warm Blackberry '73. 11 London, Spring 1999 BY THE TIME JAY ARRIVED AT SPY'S IT WAS TEN O'CLOCK AND THE party was well under way. Another of Kerry's literary launches, he thought ruefully. Bored journalists and cheap champagne and eager young things dancing attendance on blas older things like himself. Kerry never tired of these occasions, dropping names like confetti - Germaine and Will and Ewan - flitting from one prestigious guest to the other with the zeal of a high priestess. Jay had only just realized how much he hated it. Stopping at the house only long enough to pick up a few things, he saw the red light on the answerphone blinking furiously, but did not play the message. The bottles in his duffel bag were absolutely still. Now he was the one in ferment, jittering and rocking, exhilarated one moment, close to tears the next, rummaging through his possessions like a thief, afraid that if he stopped still for even a second he would lose his momentum and collapse listlessly back into his old life again. He turned on the radio and it was the oldies station again, playing Rod Stewart and 'Sailing', one of Joe's favourites - allus reminds me of them times I were on me travels, lad - and he listened as he stuffed clothes into the bag on top of the silent bottles. Amazing how little he could not bear to leave behind. His typewriter. The unfinished manuscript of Stout Cortez. Some favourite books. The radio itself. And, of course, Joe's Specials. Another impulse, he told himself. The wine was valueless, almost undrinkable. And yet he could not shake the feeling that there was something in those bottles he needed. Something he could not do without. Spy's was like so many other London clubs. The names change, the dcor changes, but the places stay the same: sleek and loud and soulless. By midnight most of the guests would have abandoned any pretentions to intellectualism that they might have had, instead settling down to the serious business of getting drunk, making advances to each other, or insulting their rivals. Getting out of the taxi with his duffel bag slung across his shoulder and his single case in his hand, Jay realized that he had forgotten his invitation. After some altercation with the doorman, however, he managed to get a message to Kerry, who emerged a few minutes later wearing her Ghost dress and steeliest smile. 'It's all right,' she flung at the doorman. 'He's just useless, that's all.' Her green eyes flicked at Jay, taking in the jeans, the raincoat, the duffel bag. 'I see you didn't wear the Armani,' she said. The euphoria was finally gone, leaving only a kind of dim hangover in its wake, but Jay was surprised to find his resolve unchanged. Touching the duffel bag seemed to help somehow, and he did $o, as if to test its reality. Under the canvas the bottles clinked quietly together. 'I've bought a house,' said Jay, holding out the crumpled brochure. 'Look. It's Joe's chteau, Kerry. I bought it this morning. I recognized it.' Beneath that flat green stare he felt absurdly childish. Why had he expected her to understand? He barely understood his impulse himself. 'It's called Chfiteau Foudouin,' he said. She looked at him. 'You bought a house.' He nodded. 'Just like that, you bought it?' she asked in disbelief. 'You bought it today?' He nodded again. There were so many things he wanted to say. It was destiny, he would have told her, it was the magic he had searched for twenty years to recapture. He wanted to explain about the brochure and the square of sunlight and how the picture had leaped out at him from the page. He wanted to explain about the sudden certainty of it, the feeling that it was the house which chose him, and not the other way around. 'You can't have bought a house.' Kerry was still struggling with the idea. 'God, Jay, you dither for hours over buying a shirt.' 'This was different. It was like ...' He struggled to articulate what it had been like. It was an uncanny sensation, that overriding feeling of must-have. He hadn't felt this way since his teens. The knowledge that life could not be complete without this one infinitely desirable, magical, totemic object - a pair of X-ray spectacles, a set of Hell's Angels transfers, a cinema ticket, the latest band's latest single - the certainty that possession of it would change everything, its presence in the pocket to be checked, tested, retested. It wasn't an adult feeling. It was more primitive, more visceral than that. With a jolt of surprise, he realized he had not really wanted anything for twenty years. 'It was like ... being back at Pog Hill again,' he said, knowing she wouldn't understand. 'It was as if the last twenty years hadn't happened.' Kerry looked blank. 'I can't believe you impulse-bought a house,' she said. 'A car, yes. A motorbike, OK. It's the kind of thing you would do, come to think of it. Big toys to play with. But a house?' She shook her head, mystified. 'What are you going to do with it?' 'Live in it,' said Jay simply. 'Work in it.' 'But it's in France somewhere.' Irritation sharpened her voice. 'Jay, I can't afford to spend weeks in France. I'm due to start the new series next month. I've got too many commitments. I mean, is it even close to an airport?' She broke off, her eyes moving again to the duffel bag, taking in, as if for the first time, the suitcase, the travelling clothes. There was a crease between her arched brows. 'Look, Kerry--' Kerry lifted a hand imperiously. 'Go home,' she said. 'We can't discuss this here. Go home, Jay, relax, and we'll talk it all through when I get back. OK?' She sounded cautious now, as if she were addressing an excitable maniac. Jay shook his head. 'I'm not going back,' he said. 'I need to get away for a while. I wanted to say goodbye.' Even now Kerry showed no surprise. Irritation, yes. Almost anger. But she remained untroubled, secure in her convictions. 'You're pissed again, Jay,' she said. 'You haven't thought any of this through. You come to me with this crazy idea about a second home, and when I'm not instantly taken by it--' 'It isn't going to be a second home.' The tone of his voice surprised both of them. For a moment he sourided almost harsh. 'And what the fuck is that supposed to mean?' Her voice was low and dangerous. 'It means you're not listening to me. I don't think you've ever actually listened to me.' He paused. 'You're always telling me to grow up, to think for myself, to let go. But you're happy to keep me a permanent lodger in your house, to keep me dependent on you for everything. I don't have anything of my own. Contacts, friends - they're all yours, not mine. You even choose my clothes. I've got money, Kerry, I've got my books, I'm not exactly starving in a garret any more.' Kerry sounded amused, almost indulgent. 'So this is what it's all about? A little declaration of independence?' She fluttered a kiss against his cheek. 'OK. I understand you don't want to go to the party, and I'm sorry I didn't realize that this morning, OK?' She put her hand on his shoulder and smiled. The patented Kerry O'Neill smile. 'Please. Listen. Just this once.' Was this what Joe had felt, he wondered. So much easier to leave without a word, to escape the recriminations, the tears, the disbelief. To escape the guilt. But somehow he just couldn't do that to Kerry. She didn't love him any more, he knew that. If she ever had. All the same, he couldn't do it. Perhaps because he knew how it felt. 'Try to understand. This place -' His gesture included the club the neon-lit street, the low sky, the whole of London, heaving, dark and menacing below it. 'I don't belong here any more. I can't think straight when I'm here. I spend all my time waiting for something to happen, some kind of sign--' 'Oh, for Christ's sake, grow up!' She was suddenly furious, her voice rising like an angry bird's. 'Is this your excuse? Some kind of idiotic angst? If you spent less time mooning on about that old bastard Joe Cox and looked around you for a change, if only you took charge instead of talking about signs and omens--' 'But I am,' he interrupted her. 'I am taking charge. I'm doing what you've always told me to do.' 'Not by running away to France!' The note in her voice was almost panic now. 'Not just like that! You owe me. You wouldn't have lasted two minutes without me. I've introduced you to people, used my contacts for you. You were nothing but a one-book wonder, a has-been, a fucking fake--' ]ay looked at her dispassionately for a moment. Strange, he thought remotely, how quickly gamine could shift to plain meanness. Her red mouth was thin, vicious. Her eyes were crescents. Anger, familiar and liberating, wrapped around him like a cloak, and he laughed. 'Can the bullshit,' he told her. 'It always was a mutual convenience. You liked to drop my name at parties, didn't you? I was an accessory. It did you good to be seen with me. It's just like people who read poetry on the tube. People saw you with me and assumed you were a real intellectual, instead of a media wannabe without a single original thought in her head.' She stared at him, astonished and enraged. Her eyes were wide. 'What?' 'Goodbye.' He turned to go. 'Jay!' She snatched at him as he turned, slapping smartly against the duffel bag with the flat of her hand. Inside, the bottles whispered and snickered. 'How dare you turn your back on me?' she hissed. 'You were happy enough to use my contacts when it suited you. How dare you turn round and tell me you're leaving, without even giving me a proper explanation? If it's personal space you want, then say that. Go to your French chfiteau, if that's what you want, go wallow in atmosphere, if that's going to help.' She looked at him suddenly. 'Is that it? Is it another book?' She sounded hungry now, her anger sharpening into excitement. 'If that's what it is you have to tell me, Jay. You owe me that. AftEr all this time . . .' Jay looked at her. It would be so easy to say yes, he told himself. To give her something she would understand, maybe forgive. 'I don't know,' he said at last. 'I don't think so.' A taxi went by then and Jay flagged it down, throwing his luggage onto the back seat and jumping in with it. Kerry gave a cry of frustration and slapped the window of the taxi as if it were his face. 'Go on then! Run away! Hide! You're just like him, you know: a quitter! That's all you know how to do! Jay! lay!' As the taxi pulled smoothly away from the kerb Jay grinned and settled back against his duffel bag. Its contents made small contented clicking sounds all the way to the airport. 12 Pog Hill, Summer 1975 SUMMER STEERED ITS COURSE AND JAY CAME MORE OFTEN TO Pog Hill Lane. Joe seemed pleased to see him when he came by, but never commented when he did not, and the boy spent days lurking by the canal or by the railway, watching over his uncertain territory, ever on the lookout for Zeth and his two friends. His hideout at the lock was no longer secure, so he moved the treasure box from its place in the bank and cast about for a safer place. At last he found one in the derelict car on the dumping ground, taping it to the underside of the rotten fuel tank. Jay liked that old car. He spent hours lounging in its one remaining seat, smelling the musty scent of ancient leather, hidden from sight by the rampant greenery. Once or twice he heard the voices of Zeth and his mates close by, but crouching in the low belly of the car -- Joe's charm held tightly in his hand - he was safe from any but the closest investigation. He watched and listened, intoxicated with the delight of spying on his enemies. At such times he believed in the charm implicitly. He realized, as summer drew inevitably to its close, that he had grown fond of Kirby Monckton. In spite of his resistance he had found something here that he never had elsewhere. July and August sailed by like cool white 66 schooners. He went to Pog Hill Lane almost every day. Sometimes he and Joe were alone, but too often there were visitors, neighbours, friends, though Joe seemed to have no family. Jay was sometimes jealous of their time together, resentful of time given to other people, but Joe always welcomed everyone, giving out boxes of fruit from his allotment, bunches of carrots, sacks of potatoes, a bottle of blackberry wine to one, a recipe for tooth powder to another. He dealt in philtres, teas, sachets. People came openly for fruit and vegetables but stayed in secret, talking to Joe in low voices, sometimes leaving with a little packet of tissue paper or a scrap of flannel tucked into hands and pockets. He never asked for payment. Sometimes people gave him things in exchange: a loaf or two, a homemade pie, cigarettes. Jay wondered where he got his money, and where the -£5,000 to pay for his dream chateau would come from. But when he mentioned such things the old man just laughed. As September loomed closer, every day seemed to gain a special, poignant significance, a mythical quality. Jay walked the canal side in a haze of nostalgia. He took notes of the things Joe said to him in their long conversations over the redcurrant bushes and replayed them in his mind as he lay in bed. He cycled for hours over deserted, now-familiar roads and breathed the sooty warm air. He climbed Upper Kirby Hill and looked out over the purple-black expanse of the Pennines and wished he could stay for ever. Joe himself seemed untouched. He remained the same as ever, picking his fruit and laying it out in crates, making jam from windfalls, pointing out wild herbs and picking them when the moon was full, collecting bilberries from the moors and blackberries from the railway banking, preparing chutney from his tomatoes, piccalilli from his cauli- flowers, lavender bags for sleeplessness, wintergreen for rapid healing, hot peppers and rosemary in oil and pickled onions for the winter. And, of course, there was the wine. Throughout all that summer Jay smelt wine brewing, fer- 67 menting, ageing. All kinds of wine: beetroot, peapod, raspberry, elderflower, rosehip, jackapple, plum, parsnip, ginger, blackberry. The house was a distillery, with pans of fruit boiling on the stove, demijohns of wine waiting on the kitchen floor to be decanted into bottles, muslins for straining the fruit drying on the washing line, sieves, buckets, bottles, funnels, laid out in neat rows ready for use. He kept the still in his cellar. It was a big copper piece, like a giant kettle, old but burnished and cared for. He used it to make his 'spirits', the raw, eyewatering clear alcohol he used to preserve the summer fruit which sat in gleaming rows on shelves in the cellar. Potato vodka, he called it, jackapple juice. Seventy per cent proof. In it he placed equal quantities of fruit and sugar to make his liqueurs. Cherries, plums, redcurrants, bilberries. The fruit stained the liquor purple and red and black in the dim cellar light. Each jar carefully labelled and dated. More than one man could ever hope to eat. Not that Joe minded; in any case, he gave away much of what he made. Apart from his wine and a few licks of strawberry jam with his morning toast, Jay never saw him touch any of those extravagant preserves and spirits. Jay supposed the old man must have sold some of these wares during the winter, though he never saw him do it. Most of the time he just gave things away. Jay went back to school in September. The Moorlands School was as he remembered it, smelling of dust and disinfectant and polish and the bland, inescapable scent of ancient cooking. His parents' divorce went through smoothly enough, after many tearful phone calls from his mother and postal orders from the Bread Baron. Surprisingly, he felt nothing. During the summer his rage had sloughed away into indifference. Anger seemed childish to him somehow. He wrote to Joe every month or so, though the old man never wrote back as regularly. He was not much of a writer, he said, and contented himself with a card at Christmas and a couple of lines near the end of term. His 68 silence did not trouble Jay. It was enough to know that he was there. In the summer Jay went back to Kirby Monckton. Part of this was on his own insistence, but he could tell his parents were secretly relieved. His mother was filming in Ireland at the time, and the Bread Baron was spending the summer on his yacht, in the company, rumour had it, of a young fashion model called Candide. Jay escaped to Pog Hill Lane without a second glance. 13 Paris, March 1999 JAY SPENT THE NIGHT AT THE AIRPORT. HE EVEN SLEPT A LITTLE on one of Charles de Gaulle's contoured orange chairs, though he was still too jumpy to relax. His energy seemed inexhaustible, a ball of electricity punching against his ribs. His senses felt eerily enhanced. Smells - cleaning fluid, sweat, cigarette smoke, perfume, early morning coffee - rolled at him in waves. At five o'clock he abandoned the idea of sleep and went to the cafeteria, where he bought an espresso, a couple of croissants and a sugar fix of Poulain chocolate. The first Corail to Marseilles was at six ten. From there, a slower train would take him to Agen, where he could get a taxi to ... where was it? The map attached to the brochure was only a sketchy diagram, but he hoped to find clearer directions when he reached Agen. Besides, there was something pleasing about this journey, this blurring of speed to a place which was nothing yet but a cross on a map. As if by drinking Joe's wine he could suddenly become Joe, marking his passage by scratching signs on a map, changing his identity to suit his whim. And at the same time he felt lighter, freed of the hurt and anger he had carried for so long, such useless ballast, for so many years. 70 Travel far enough, Joe used to say, and all rules are suspended. Now Jay began to understand what he meant. Truth, loyalty, identity. The things which bind us to the places and faces of home no longer applied. He could be anyone. Going anywhere. At airports, railway stations, bus stations, anything is possible. No-one asks questions. People reach a state of near-invisibility. He was just another passenger here, one of thousands. No-one would recognize him. No- one had even heard of him. He managed to sleep for a few hours on the train, and dreamed - a dream of astonishing vividness - of himself running along the canal bank at Nether Edge, trying vainly to catch up with a departing coal train. With exceptional clarity he could see the somehow prehistoric metal of the train's undercarriage. He could smell coal dust and old grease from the trucks' axles. And on the last truck he could see Joe, sitting on top of the coal in his orange miner's overalls and a British Railways engineer's cap, waving goodbye with a bottle of home-brewed wine in one hand and a map of the world in the other, calling in a voice made tinny by distance words Jay could not quite hear. He awoke, needing a drink, twenty miles from Marseilles, with the countryside a long bright blur at the window. He went to the minibar for a vodka and tonic and drank it slowly, then lit a cigarette. It still felt like a forbidden pleasure - guilt laced with exhilaration, like playing truant from school. He pulled the brochure out of his pocket once more. Decidedly crumpled now, the cheap paper beginning to tear at the folds. For a moment he almost expected to feel differently, to find that the sense of must-have was gone. But it was still there. In the duffel bag at his side the Specials lolled and gurgled with the train's movement, and inside the sediment of past summers stirred like crimson slurry. He felt as if the train would never reach Marseilles. Pog Hill, Summer 1976 HE WAS WAITING ON THE ALLOTMENT. tTHE RADIO WAS PLAYING, tied with a piece of string to the branch of a tree, and Jay could hear him singing along - Thin Lizzy and 'The Boys Are Back In Town' -- in his extravagant music-hall voice. He had his back turned, leaning over a patch of loganberries with secateurs in one hand, and he greeted Jay without turning round, casually, as if he had never been away. Jay's first thought was that he'd aged; the hair beneath the greasy cap was thinner, and he could see the sharp, vulnerable ridge of his spine through his old T-shirt, but when the old man turned round he could see it was the same Joe, jay-blue eyes above a smile more suited to a fourteen-year-old than a man of sixty-five. He was wearing one of his red flannel sachets around his neck. Looking more carefully around the allotment Jay saw that a similar charm adorned every tree, every bush, even the corners of the greenhouse and the home-made cold frame. Small seedlings protected under jars and bisected lemonade bottles each bore a twist of red thread or a sign crayoned in the same colour. It might have been another of Joe's elaborate jokes, like the earwig traps or the sherbert plant or sending him to the garden centre for a long weight, but this time there was a dogged, sombre look to the old mai amusement, like that of a man under siege. Jay asked h about the charms, expecting the usual joke or wink, h Joe's expression remained serious. 'Protection, lad,' he said quietly. 'Protection.' It took the boy a long time to realize quite how serious was. Summer wound on like a dusty road. Jay called by P Hill Lane almost every day, and when he felt in need solitude he went over to Nether Edge and the can Nothing much had changed. New glories on the dun abandoned fridges, ragbags, a clock with a cracked cash a cardboard box of tattered paperback books. The railwc too, delivered riches: papers, magazines, broken recon crockery, cans, returnable glass. Every morning he comb the rails, picking up what looked interesting or valuab and he shared his finds with Joe back at the house. Wi Joe, nothing was wasted. Old newspapers went into t compost. Pieces of carpet kept the weeds down in t vegetable patch. Plastic bags covered the branches of I fruit trees and protected them from the birds. He demo strated how to make cloches for young seedlings from t round end of a plastic lemonade bottle, and potato-plante from discarded car tyres. They spent a whole afternoi dragging an abandoned box freezer up the railway bankil to make a cold frame. Scrap metal and old clothes we piled into cardboard boxes and sold to the rag-and-bo: man. Empty paint tins and plastic buckets were convert into plant pots. In return, he taught Jay more about t, garden. Slowly the boy learned to tell lavender fro rosemary from hyssop from sage. He learned to taste si - a pinch between the finger and thumb slipped under t. tongue, like a man testing fine tobacco - to determine i acidity. He learned how to calm a headache with crushi lavender, or a stomach ache with peppermint. He learned make skullcap tea and camomile to aid sleep. He learni to plant marigolds in the potato patch to discourage par 73 sites, and to pick nettles from the top to make ale, and to fork the sign against the evil eye if ever a magpie flew past. There were times, of course, when the old man couldn't resist a little joke. Like giving him daffodil bulbs to fry instead of onions, or planting ripe strawberries in the border to see if they'd grow. But most of the time he was serious, or so Jay thought, finding real pleasure in his new role as a teacher. Perhaps he knew it was coming to an end, even then, though Jay never suspected it, but it was that year that he was happiest, sitting in the allotment with the radio playing, or sorting through boxes of junk, or holding the vegetable-cutter for Joe as they selected fruit for the next batch of wine. They discussed the merits of 'Good Vibrations' (Jay's choice) versus 'Brand New Combine Harvester' (Joe's). He felt safe, protected, as if all this were a little pocket of eternity which could never be lost, never fail. But something was changing. Perhaps it was in Joe: a new restlessness, the wary look he had, the diminishing number of visitors - sometimes only one or two in a whole week - or the new, eerie quiet in Pog Hill Lane. No more hammering, no singing in the yards, less washing hanging out to dry on clothes lines, rabbit hutches and pigeon lofts abandoned and derelict. Often Joe would walk to the outer edge of his allotment and look over the railway in silence. There were fewer trains, too, a couple of passenger trains a day on the fast line, the rest shunters and coal trucks ambling slowly north to the yard. The rails, so shiny and bright last year, were beginning to show rust. 'Looks like they're plannin to close the line,' Joe remarked on one of these occasions. "Goin to knock down Kirby Central next month.' Kirby Central was the main signal box down by the station. 'Pog Hill, anall, if I'm not mistaken.' 'But that's your greenhouse,' protested Jay. Since he had known Joe, the old man had used the derelict signal box fifty yards from his back garden as an unofficial greenhouse, and it was filled with delicate plants, tomatoes, two peach trees, a couple of vines branching out into the eaves, escaping onto the white roof in a spill of broad, bright leaves. Joe shrugged. 'They usually knock em flat first off,' he remarked. 'I've bin lucky so far." His eyes moved to the red charm bags nailed to the back wall and he reached out to pinch one between finger and thumb. Thing is, we've bin careful,' he continued. 'Not drawn attention to usselves. But if they shut that line, there'll be men taking up the track all down Pog Hill and towards Nether Edge. They might be here for months. And this here, it's private property. Belongs to British Railways. You an me, lad, we're trespassers.' Jay followed his gaze across the railway cutting, taking in, as if for the first time, the breadth of the allotment, the neat straight rows of vegetables, the cold frames, the hundreds of plastic planters, dozens of fruit trees, thick stands of raspberries, blackcurrants, rhubarb. Funny, he'd never thought of it as trespassing before. 'Oh. D'you think they'd want to take it back?' Joe didn't look at him. Of course they would take it back. He could see that in the old man's profile, in the calculating look on his face - how long to replant? How long to rebuild? Not because they wanted it, but because it was theirs to take, their territory, wasteland or not, theirs. Jay had a sudden, vivid memory of Zeth and his mates as Zeth booted the radio into the air. There would be the same expressions on their faces as they pulled up the railway, broke up the greenhouse, tore up plants and bushes, bulldozed through the sweet drifts of lavender and the half-ripened pears, unearthed potatoes and carrots and parsnips and all the arcane exotica of a lifetime's collection. Jay felt a sudden brimming rage for the old man, and his fists clenched painfully against the bricks. 'They can't do that!' he said fiercely. Joe shrugged. Of course they could. Now Jay understood 75 the significance of the charm bags hanging on every surface, every protruding nail, every tree, everything he wanted to save. It couldn't make him invisible, but it might . . . might what? Keep the bulldozers away? Impossible. Joe said nothing. His eyes were bright and serene. For a second he looked like the old gunslinger in a hundred Westerns, strapping on his guns for a final showdown. For a second everything - anything - seemed possible. Whatever might have happened later, he believed in it then. 76 Marseilles, March 1999 THE TRAIN REACHED MARSEILLES AROUND NOON. IT WAS WARM but cloudy, and Jay carried his coat over his arm as he moved through the aimless crowds. He bought a couple of sandwiches at a stand by the platform, but was still too nervous, too energized to eat. The train to Agen was almost an hour late, and slow; almost as long as the journey from Paris. Energy drained away into exhaustion. He slept uncomfortably as they nudged from one small station to another, feeling hot and thirsty and slightly hungover. He kept needing to take out the leaflet again, just to be sure he wasn't imagining it all. He tried to get the radio to work, but all he could get was white noise. It was late afternoon when he finally reached Agen. He was beginning to feel more alert again, more aware of his surroundings. He could see fields and farms from the carriage, orchards and ploughed chocolate-coloured earth. Everything looked very green. Many of the trees were already in flower, unusually early for March, he thought, though his only experience of gardening was with Joe, a thousand miles further north. He took a taxi to the estate agent's - the address was on the leaflet - hoping to get permission to view the house, but the place was already shut. Damn! In the excitement of his escape Jay had never considered what he would do if this happened. Find a hotel in Agen? Not without seeing his house. His house. The thought lifted the hairs on his forearms. Tomorrow was Sunday. Chances were that the agency would be closed again. He would have to wait until Monday morning. He stood, hesitating in front of the locked door as the taxi driver behind him grew impatient. How far exactly was LansquenetsousTannes? Surely there would be something, even something basic like a Campanile or an Ibis or, failing that, a chambre d'hote where he could stay? It was half-past five. He would have time to see the house, even if it was only from the outside, before the light failed. The urge was too strong. Turning back to the bored taxi driver with unaccustomed decisiveness Jay showed him the map. "Vous pouvez m'y conduire tout de suite?' The man considered for a moment, with the air of slow reflection typical of that part of the country. Jay pulled out a clip of banknotes from the pocket of his jeans and showed them to him. The driver shrugged incuriously and jerked his head towards the cab again. Jay noticed he didn't offer to help with the luggage. The drive took half an hour. Jay dozed again in the leather-and-tobacco scented rear of the cab, whilst the driver smoked Gauloises and grunted to himself in satisfaction as he blared without indicating through files of motorway traffic, then sped down narrow small lanes, honking his horn imperiously at corners, occasionally sending flurries of chickens squawking into the air. Jay was beginning to feel hungry and in need of a drink. He had assumed he would find a place to eat when they reached Lansquenet. But now, looking at the dirt lane down which the taxi jolted and revved, he was beginning to have serious doubts. He tapped the driver on the shoulder. 'C'est encore Join?' 78 H The driver shrugged, pointing ahead, and slowed the car po a rumbling halt. 'Ld.' Sure enough, there it was, just behind a little copse of es. The red slanting light of a modest sunset lit the tiled of and the whitewashed walls with almost eerie bright- ss. Jay could see the gleam of water somewhere to the Ie, and the orchard - green in the photograph - was now roth of pale blossoms. It was beautiful. He paid the driver » much of his remaining French money and pulled his ie out onto the road. i'Attendez-moi ici. Je reviens tout de suite.' |;The driver made a vague gesture, which he took to be reement, and, leaving him to wait by the deserted roadie, Jay began to walk quickly towards the trees. As he iched the copse he found he could see more clearly down vards the house and across the vineyard. The photo- aph in the brochure was deceptive, showing little of the ale of the property. Being a city boy Jay had no idea of the reage, but it looked huge, bordered on one side by road id river, and on the other by a long hedge, which reached yond the back of the house on to more fields. On the far ie of the river he could see another farmhouse, small and (w-roofed, and beyond that the village - a church spire, a »ad winding up from the river, houses. The path to the house led past the vineyard - already green and leggy with growth among drifts of weeds - and past an abandoned vegetable plot, where last year's asparagus, artichokes and cabbages reared hairy heads above the dandelions. It took about ten minutes to reach the house. As he came closer Jay noticed that, like the vineyard and the vegetable plot, it was in need of some repair. The pinkish paint was peeling away in places, revealing cracked grey plaster beneath. Tiles from the roof had fallen and smashed onto the overgrown path. The ground-floor windows were shuttered or boarded up, and some of the upstairs glass was broken, showing toothy gaps in the pale facing. The front 79 door was nailed shut. The whole impression was of a building which had been derelict for years. And yet the vegetable plot showed signs of recent, or fairly recent, attention. Jay walked around the building once, noting the extent of the damage, and told himself that most of it looked superficial, the work of neglect and the elements. Inside might be different. He found a place where a broken shutter had come away from the plaster, leaving a gap large enough to look through, and put his face to the hole. It was dark inside, and he could hear a distant sound of water dripping. Suddenly something moved inside the building. Rats, he thought at first. Then it moved again, softly, stealthily, scraping across the floor with a sound like metal-capped boots on cellar concrete. Definitely not rats, then. He called out - absurdly, in English - 'Hey!' The sound stopped. Squinting through the gap in the shutter Jay thought he could see something move, a dim shadow just in his line of vision, something which might almost have been a figure in a big coat with a cap pulled down over the eyes. 'Joe? Joe?' It was crazy. Of course it wasn't Joe. It was just that he'd been thinking of him so much in the past few days that he had begun to imagine him everywhere. It was natural, he supposed. When he looked again the figure - if there ever was a figure - had gone. The house was silent. Jay knew a fleeting moment of disappointment, of something almost like grief, which he dared not analyse too closely in case it should reveal itself to be something even crazier, a conviction, perhaps, that Joe could have actually been there, waiting. Old Joe, with his cap and miner's boots and his baggy overcoat against the cold, waiting in the deserted house, living off the land. Jay's mind crept remorselessly to the recently abandoned vegetable plot - there must have been someone to plant those seeds - with a mad kind of logic. Someone had been there. 80 He looked at his watch and was startled to see that he had been at the house for almost twenty minutes. He had asked the taxi driver to wait at the roadside, and he didn't want to spend the night in Lansquenet. From what he had seen of the place it was unlikely that he would be able to find a decent place to stay, and he was beginning to feel very hungry. He broke into a run as he passed the orchard, goosegrass clinging to the laces of his boots as he passed, and he was sweating when at last he rounded the curve out of the copse and back onto the track. There was no sign of the taxi. Jay swore. His case and duffel bag were lined up incongruously by the roadside. The driver, tired of waiting for the crazy Englishman, had gone. Like it or not, he was staying. Pog Hill, Summer 1976 KIRBY CENTRAL WENT IN LATE AUGUST. JAY WAS THERE WHEN they closed it, hiding in a tall clump of seedy willowherb, and when they had gone - taking with them the levers, light signals and anything which might otherwise be stolen - he crept up the steps and peered in through the window. Train registers and route diagrams had been left in the box, though the lever frame gaped emptily, and it looked strangely inhabited, as if the signalman had just stepped out and might return at any moment. Jay reckoned there was plenty of usable glass left, if Joe and he came to fetch it. 'Don't bother, lad,' Joe said when he reported this. "I'll already have me hands full this autumn.' Jay needed no explanation for his words. Since the beginning of August Joe had become more and more concerned about the fate of his allotment. He rarely spoke about it openly, but he would sometimes stop working and gaze at his trees, as if measuring the time they had left. Sometimes he lingered to touch the smooth bark of an apple or a plum tree and spoke - to Jay, to himself - in a low voice. He always referred to them by name, as if they were people. 'Mirabelle. Doin well, int she? That's a French plum, a yeller gage, a goodun for jam or wine or just for eatin. She likes it here on the bank, it's nicely drained and sunny.' He paused. 'Too late to move fold girl, though,' he said regretfully. 'She'd never survive. Yer sink yer roots deep, thinkin yer goin to stay for ever, and this is what happens. The buggers.' It was the closest he had come in weeks to mentioning the allotment problem. 'Tryin to knock down Pog Hill Lane now, anall.' Joe's voice was louder now, and Jay realized that this was the first time he had ever seen him close to anger. 'Pog Hill Lane, that's bin standin for a hundred year-a-more, that were built when there were still a pit down Nether Edge, and navvies workin down at canal side.' Jay stared at him. 'Knock down Pog Hill Lane?' he asked. 'You mean the houses?' Joe nodded. 'Got a letter int post tother day,' he told him shortly. 'Buggers reckon we're not safe any more. Goin to condemn em all. All t'row.' His face was grim in its amusement. 'Condemned. After all this time. Thirty-nine years I've bin here, since Nether Edge and Upper Kirby shut down. Bought me own pit house offat council anall. Didn't trust em, even then--' He broke off, holding up his reduced left hand in a mocking three-fingered salute. 'How much more do they want, eh? I left me fingers down that pit. I near as buggery left me life. You'd think that'd be worth somethin. You'd think they'd remember summat like that!' Jay gaped at him. This was a Joe he had never seen before. Awe, and a kind of fear, kept him silent. Then Joe stopped as abruptly as he had begun, bending solicitously over a newly grafted branch to examine the healing joint. 'I thought it was during the war,' said Jay at last. 'What?' Gaudy red cotton joined the new graft to the branch. On it Joe had smeared some kind of resin, which gave out a pungent sappy scent. He nodded to himself, as if satisfied with the tree's progress. 83 'You told me you'd lost your fingers in Dieppe,' insisted Jay. 'During the war." 'Aye. Well.' Joe was unembarrassed. 'It were a kind of war down there any road. Lost em when I were sixteen crushed between two trucks back in 1931. Wouldn't take me in the Army after that, so I signed up as a Bevan boy. We had three cave-ins that year. Seven men trapped underground when a tunnel collapsed. Not even grown men, some of em - boys my age and younger; you could go underground at fourteen on a man's wage. Worked double shifts for a week tryin to get em out. We could hear em behind the cave-in, yellin and cryin, but every time we tried to get to em another bit of the tunnel came down on us. We were workin in darkness because of the gas, knee-deep in slurry. We were soaked an half suffocated, an we all knew the roof could fall in again any minute, but we never stopped tryin. Not till at last the bosses came and closed down the shaft altogether.' He looked at Jay with unexpected vehemence, his eyes dark with ancient rage. 'So don't go tellin me I never went to war, lad,' he snapped. 'I know as much about war - what war means - as any o them lads in France.' Jay stared at him, unsure of what to say. Joe looked off into the middle distance, hearing the cries and pleading of young men long dead from the quiet scar of Nether Edge. Jay shivered. 'So what will you do now?' Joe looked at him closely, as if checking for any sign of condemnation. Then he relaxed and gave his old rueful smile, at the same time digging in his pocket to produce a grubby packet of Jelly Babies. He chose one for himself, then held out the packet to Jay. 'I'll do what I've allus done, lad,' he declared. 'I'll bloody well fight for what's mine. I'll not let em get away with it. Pog Hill's mine, an I'll not be moved onto some poxy estate by them or anyone.' He bit off the head of his Jelly Baby with relish and chose another from the packet. 84 "But what can you do?' protested Jay. "There'll be eviction orders. They'll cut off your gas and electricity. Can't you--' Joe looked at him. 'There's allus somethin you can do, lad,' he said softly. "I reckon maybe it's time to find out what really works. Time to bring out sandbags and batten down hatches. Time to fatten up t'black cockerel, like they do in Haiti.' He winked hugely, as if to share a mysterious joke. Jay glanced around at the allotment. He looked at the charms nailed to the wall and tied onto the tree branches, the signs laid out in broken glass on the ground and chalked onto flower pots and he felt a sudden, terrible hopelessness. It all looked so fragile, so touchingly doomed. He saw the houses then, those blackened, mean little terraces, with their crooked pointing and outside toilets and windows sheeted over with plastic. Washing hanging on a single line five or six houses down. A couple of kids playing in the gutter in front. And Joe - sweet old crazy Joe, with his dreams and his travels and his chotto and his millions of seeds and his cellar full of bottles - preparing himself for a war he could never hope to win, armed only with everyday magic and a few quarts of home-brewed wine. 'Don't take on, lad,' urged Joe. 'We'll be reight, you'll see. There's more than one trick up me sleeve, as them buggers from council'll find out.' But his words sounded hollow. For all his talk it was really just bravado. There was nothing he could do. Of course Jay pretended, for his sake, to believe him. He gathered herbs on the railway embankment. He sewed dried leaves into red sachets. He repeated strange words and made ritual gestures in imitation of his. They had to seal the perimeter, as Joe called it, twice a day. This involved walking around the property -- up the railway embankment and round the allotment, past Pog Hill box, which Joe counted as his, then into Pog Hill Lane and through the ginnel which linked Joe's house to his neigh hour's, past the front door and back over the wall to the other side - carrying a red candle and burning bay leaves steeped in scented oil while they solemnly incanted a string of incomprehensible phrases, which Joe claimed were Latin. From what Joe said, this ritual was supposed to shield the house and its grounds from unwanted influences, deliver protection and affirm his ownership of the territory, and as the holidays came to an end it increased daily in length and complexity, growing from a three-minute dash around the garden to a solemn procession lasting fifteen minutes or more. In other circumstances Jay might have enjoyed these daily ceremonies, but whereas last year there had been an element of mockery in everything Joe said, now the old man had less time for jokes. Jay guessed that behind this screen of unconcern his anxiety was growing. He spoke increasingly about his travels, recounted past adventures and planned future expeditions, announced his immediate decision to leave Pog Hill Lane for his chateau in France, then in the same breath swore he'd never leave his old home unless they carried him out feet first. He worked frantically in the garden. Autumn came early that year and there was fruit to be harvested; jams, wine, preserves, pickles to be made; potatoes and turnips to be dug and stored, as well as the increasing demands of Joe's magical barrier, which now took thirty minutes to complete and involved much gesticulating and scattering of powders, as well as preparation of scented oils and herbal mixtures. There was a haunted look to Joe now, a stretched look to his features, a glittery brightness in his eyes, which came of sleeplessness - or drink. For he was drinking far more now than he had ever done, not just wine or nettle beer but spirits, too, the potato vodka from the pot-still in the cellar, last year's liqueurs from his downstairs store. Jay wondered whether, at this pace, Joe would survive the winter at all. 'I'll be reight,' Joe told him when he voiced his concern. 'It just needs a bit more work, that's all. Come winter I'll be reight again, I promise.' He stood up, hands in the small of his back, and stretched. 'That's better.' He grinned then, and for a moment he was almost the old Joe, eyes brimming with laughter under his greasy pit cap. 'I've looked after mesself for a few years before you came along, lad. It'd take a sight more than a few council monkeys to get the better of me.' And he immediately launched into a long, absurd story from his travelling days about a man trying to sell cheap trinkets to a tribe of Amazonian Indians. 'And the chief of the tribe - Chief Mungawomba, his name were - handed back the stuff and said - I'd been teachin him English in me free time - "Tha can keep thi beads, mate, but I'd be really grateful if tha could fix me toaster." ' They both laughed, and for a time the unease was forgotten, or at least dismissed. Jay wanted to believe Pog Hill was safe. On some days he looked at the arcane jumble of the allotment and the back garden and he almost did believe it. Joe seemed so sure, so permanent. Surely he would be there for ever. Lansquenet, March 1999 HE STOOD BESIDE THE ROADSIDE FOR A MOMENT, DISMAYED AND disoriented. By then it was almost dark; the sky had reached that luminous shade of deep blue which just precedes full night, and the horizon beyond the house was striated with pale lemon and green and pink. The beauty of it - his property, he told himself again, with that breathless, unreal feeling inside - left him feeling a little shaken. In spite of his predicament he could not shrug off a sensation of excitement, as if this, too, were somehow meant to happen. No-one - no-one, he told himself - knew where he was. The wine bottles rattled against each other as he picked up the duffel bag from the side of the road. A scent - of summer, of wild spinach or shale dust and stagnant water rose briefly from the damp ground. Something fluttering from the branch of a flowering hawthorn tree caught his eye and he picked at it automatically, bringing it closer towards him. It was a piece of red flannel. In the bag the bottles began to rattle and froth. Their voices rose in a whispering, crackling, sighing, chuckling of hidden consonants and secret vowels. Jay felt a sudden breeze tug at his clothing, a murmur of something, a throbbing deep in the soft air, like a heart. 'Home is where the heart is.' One of Joe's favourite sayings. 'Where the art is.' Jay looked back at the road. It was not really so late. Not too late, in any case, to find somewhere to stay the night and to buy a meal. The village - a few lights now, winking over the river, the distant sound of music from across the fields -- must be less than half an hour's walk away. He could leave his case here, safely hidden in the roadside bushes, and take only his bag. For some reason - inside the bottles joltered and chuckled - he felt reluctant to leave the duffel bag. But the house drew him. Ridiculous, he told himself. He had already seen that the house was uninhabitable, at least for the moment. Looked uninhabitable, he amended, recalling Pog Hill Lane, the derelict gardens and boarded-up windows and the secret, gleeful life behind. What if, maybe, just behind the door . . . Funny how his mind kept returning to that thought. There was no logic in it and yet it was slyly persuasive. That abandoned vegetable patch, the scrap of red flannel, that feeling, that certainty, that there really was someone inside the house. Inside the duffel bag the carnival had begun again. Catcalls, laughter, distant fanfare. It sounded like coming home. Even I could feel it -- I, grown in vineyards far from here, in Burgundy, where the air is brighter and the earth richer, kinder. It was the sound of home fires and doors opening and the smell of bread baking and clean sheets and warm, friendly unwashed bodies. Jay felt it, too, but assumed it came from the house; almost without thinking he took another step towards the darkened building. It would not hurt to have another look, he told himself. Just to be sure. 89 18 Pog Hill, Summer 1977 SEPTEMBER CAME. JAY WENT BACK TO SCHOOL WITH A SENSE OF finality, a feeling that something at Pog Hill had changed. If it had, then Joe's short, infrequent letters gave no sign. There was a card at Christmas - two lines, carefully inscribed with the round printing of the barely literate - then another at Easter. The terms crawled to an end as usual. Jay's fifteenth birthday came and went - a cricket bat from his father and Candide, theatre tickets from his mother. After that came exams; dorm parties; secrets told and promises broken; a couple of hot-weather fights; a school play, A Midsummer Night's Dream, with all the parts played by boys, as in Shakespeare's time. Jay played Puck, much to the chagrin of the Bread Baron, but all the time he was thinking of Joe and Pog Hill, and as the end of the summer term approached, he grew jumpy and irritable and impatient. This year his mother had decided to join him in Kirby Monckton for a few weeks, ostensibly to spend more time with her son, but in reality to escape the media attention following her most recent amorous break-up. Jay wasn't looking forward to being the focus of her sudden maternal interest, and said so clearly enough to provoke an outburst of outraged histrionics. He was in disgrace before the holidays had even started. 90 They arrived in late June, by taxi, in the rain. Jay's mother was doing her Mater DoJorosa act, and he was trying to listen to the radio as she passed between long, soulful silences and girlish exclamations on seeing forgotten landmarks. "Jay, darling, look! That little church - isn't it just the sweetest?' He put it down to her being in so many sitcoms, but maybe she had always talked like that. Jay turned the radio up a fraction. The Eagles were playing 'Hotel California'. She gave him one of her pained looks and thinned her mouth. Jay ignored her. The rain came down non-stop for the first week of the holiday. Jay stayed in the house and watched it and listened to the radio, trying to tell himself it couldn't last for ever. The sky was white and portentous. Looking up into the clouds, the falling raindrops looked like soot. His grandparents fussed over both of them, treating his mother like the little girl she had been, cooking all her favourite meals. For five days they lived on apple pie, ice cream, fried fish and scollops. On the sixth day Jay took his bike down to Pog Hill, in spite of the weather, but Joe's door was locked and there was no answer to his knocking. Jay left his bike by the back wall and climbed over into the garden, hoping to look in through the windows. The windows were boarded up. Panic washed over him. He hammered on one of the sealed windows with his fist. 'Hey, Joe? Joe?' There was no answer. He hammered again, calling Joe's name. A piece of red flannel, bleached by the elements, was nailed to the window frame, but it looked old, finished, last year's magic. Behind the house a screen of tall weeds hemlock and wormwood and rosebay willowherb - hid the abandoned allotment. Jay sat down on the wall, regardless of the rain which glued his T-shirt to his skin and dripped from his hair into his eyes. He felt completely numb. How could Joe have gone, he asked himself stupidly. Why hadn't he said something? Written a note, even? How could Joe have gone without him? "Don't take on, lad,' called a voice behind him. 'It's not as bad as it looks.' Jay whipped round so fast he almost fell off the wall. Joe was standing some twenty feet behind him, almost hidden from sight behind the tall weeds. He was wearing a yellow sou'wester on top of his pit cap. He had a spade in one hand. 'Joe?' The old man grinned. 'Aye. What d'you think, then?' Jay was beyond words. 'It's me permanent solution,' explained Joe, looking pleased. 'They've cut off me lectrics, but I've wired mesself up to bypass the meter, so I can still use em. I've bin diggin a well round back so I can do waterin. Come over and tell me what you think.' As always, Joe behaved as if no time had passed, as if Jay had never been away. He parted the weeds which separated them and motioned the boy to follow him through. Beyond, the allotment was as ordered as it had always been, with lemonade bottles sheltering small plants, old windows arranged to make cold frames, and tyres stacked up for potato-planters. From a distance the whole thing might just have been the accumulated detritus of years, but come a little closer and everything was there, just as before. On the railway banking, fruit trees - some shielded with sheets of plastic — dripped rain. It was the best camouflage job Jay had ever seen. 'It's amazing,' he said at last. 'I really thought you'd gone.' Joe looked pleased. 'You're not the only one that thinks that, lad,' he said mysteriously. 'Look down there.' Jay looked down into the cutting. The signal box which had been Joe's greenhouse was still standing, though in a state of dereliction; vines grew out of the punctured roof and tumbled down the peeling sides. The lines had been taken up and the sleepers dug out - all but the fifty-yard stretch between the box and Joe's house, as if overlooked by some accident. Between the rust-red tracks weeds were sprouting. "Come next year no-one'll even remember there were a railway down Pog Hill. Praps people'll let us alone then.' Jay nodded slowly, still speechless with amazement and relief. 'Perhaps they will.' 93 Lansquenet, March 1999 THE AIR SMELT OF NIGHTFALL, BITTER-SMOKY, LIKE LAPSANG TEA, mild enough to sleep outside. The vineyard on the left was filled with noises: birds, frogs, insects. Jay could still see the path at his feet, faintly silvered with the last of the sunset, but the sun had left the face of the house and it was lightless, almost forbidding. He began to wonder whether he should have postponed his visit till the morning. The thought of the long walk to the village dissuaded him. He was wearing boots, which had seemed like a good enough idea when he left London, but which now, after so many hours of travelling, had grown tight and uncomfortable. If he could only get into the house - from what he'd seen of security that wouldn't be difficult - he could sleep there and make his way to the village in daylight. It wasn't as if he were trespassing, really. After all, the house was nearly his. He reached the vegetable patch. Something on the side of the house - a shutter, perhaps - was flapping rhythmically against the plaster, making a nagging, mournful sound. On the far side of the building shadows moved under the trees, creating the illusion of a man standing there, a bent figure in cap and overcoat. Something whipped across his path with a snapping noise — a prickly artichoke stem, still topped with last year's flower, now desiccated almost to nothing. Beyond it, the overgrown remnants of the vegetable patch swayed briskly in the freshening wind. Halfway across the abandoned garden something fluttered, as if snagged on a stiff piece of briar. A scrap of cloth. From where Jay was standing he could see nothing more, but he knew immediately what it was. Flannel. Red. Dropping his bag by the side of the path he strode into the drift of weeds which had been the vegetable garden, pushing aside the long stems as he passed. It was a sign. It had to be. Just as he stepped forward to take hold of the piece of flannel something crunched briefly under his left foot and gave way with an angry clatter of metal, punching through the soft leather of his boot and into his ankle. Jay's feet gave way, tipping him backwards into the greenery, and the pain, bad enough at first, bloomed sickeningly. Swearing, he grabbed at the object in the dim light, and his fingers encountered something jagged and metallic attached to his foot. A trap, he thought, bewildered. Some sort of trap. It hurt to think straight, and for precious seconds Jay yanked mindlessly at the object as it bit deeper through his boot. His fingers felt slick on the metal, and he realized he was bleeding. He began to panic. With an effort he forced himself to stop moving. If it was a trap, then it would have to be forced open. Paranoid to imagine someone had set it deliberately. It must have been someone trying to catch rabbits, perhaps, or foxes, or something. For a moment anger dulled the pain. The irresponsibility, the criminal carelessness of placing animal traps so close to someone's house — to his house. Jay fumbled with the trap. It felt ancient, primitive. It was a clam-shell design, fixed into the ground by a metal peg. There was a catch at the side. Jay cursed and struggled with the mechanism, feeling the teeth of the trap crunching deeper into his ankle with 95 every move he made. Finally he managed the catch, but it took several tries to push open the metal jaws, and when he finally got it clear he pulled himself back, awkwardly, and tried to assess the damage. His foot had already swollen tight against the leather, so that the boot would be difficult or impossible to remove in the normal way. Trying not to think about the types of bacteria which might even now be working their way into him, he pushed himself upright and managed to hop clumsily back to the path, where he sat down on the stones to try to remove his boot. It took him nearly ten minutes. By the time he had finished he was sweating. It was too dark to see very much, but even so he could tell it would be some time before he dared to try walking. 96 Pog Hill, Summer 1977 IDE'S NEW DEFENCES WERE NOT THE ONLY CHANGE AT POG HILL that year. Nether Edge had visitors. Jay still went to the Edge every couple of days, attracted by its promise of gentle dereliction, of things left to rot in peace. Even at the peak of that summer he never abandoned his favourite haunts; he still visited the canal side and the ash pit and the dump, partly to look for useful things for Joe and partly because the place still fascinated him. It must have attracted the gypsies, too, because one day there they were, a shabby foursome of caravans, squared together like pioneers' wagons against the enemy. The caravans were grey and rusting, axles sagging under the weight of accumulated baggage, doors hanging by a string, windows whitening with age. The people were equally disappointing. Six adults and as many children, clad in jeans or overalls or cheap bright market-stall nylons, they gave off an air of distant grubbiness, a visual extension of the smells which floated from their camp, the permanent odour of frying grease and dirty laundry and petrol and garbage. Jay had never seen gypsies before. This drab, prosaic group was not what his reading had prepared him to expect. He had imagined horse-drawn wagons with out landishly decorated sides, dark-haired dangerous girls with daggers in their belts, blind crones with the gift of far seeing. Certainly Joe's experiences with gypsies seemed to confirm this, and as Jay watched the caravans from his vantage point above the lock he felt annoyed at their intrusion. These seemed to be ordinary people, and until Joe confirmed their exotic lineage Jay was inclined to think they were nothing but tourists, campers from the south walking the moors. 'No, lad,' Joe said as he pointed out the distant camp, a pale string of smoke rising from a tin chimney into the sky of Nether Edge. 'They're not trippers. They're gypsies all right. Mebbe not proper Romanies, but gyppos, you might call em. Travellers. Like I was once.' He squinted curiously through cigarette smoke at the camp. 'Reckon they'll stay the winter,' he said. 'Move on when spring comes. No-one'll bother em downt Edge. No-one ever goes there any more.' Not strictly true, of course. Jay considered Nether Edge his territory, and for a few days he watched the gypsies with all the resentment he had felt against Zeth and his gang that first year. He rarely saw much movement from the caravans, though sometimes there was washing strung out on nearby trees. A dog tethered to the nearest of the vehicles yapped shrilly and intermittently. Once or twice he saw a woman carry water in large canisters to her vehicle. The water came from a kind of spigot, set into the square of concrete by the dirt track. There was a similar dispenser on the other side of the camp. 'Set it up years back,' explained Joe. 'Gypsy camp, with water an lectricity laid on. There's a pay meter down there that they use, an a septic tank. Even rubbish gets collected once a week. You'd think more people'd use it, but they don't. Funny folk, gypsies.' The last time Joe remembered gypsies on the waste ground was about ten years previously. 'Romanies, they were,' he said. 'You don't get many proper Romanies nowadays. Used to buy their fruit and 98 'from me. There wasn't many that'd sell to em in them . Said they were no better than beggars.' He grinned. I, I'm not sayin everythin they did was dead-straight st, but you've got to get by when you're on the road. ' worked a way to beat the meter. It took fifty pences, Well, they used water and lectricity all summer, but i they'd gone and council came round to empty the r, all there was at bottom was a pool of water. They r did find out how they'd done it. Lock hadn't been hed. Nothin seemed to have bin interfered with at all.' y looked at Joe with interest. ? how did they do it?' he enquired curiously. e grinned again and tapped the side of his nose. Ichemy,' he whispered, to Jay's annoyance, and would ao more on the subject. e's tales had renewed his interest in the gypsies. Jay ihed the camp for several days after that, but saw no nice of secret goings-on. Eventually he abandoned his But post at the lock to hunt more interesting game, :hing for comics and magazines from the dump, comb- he railway for its everyday leavings. He worked out a I way of getting free coal for Joe's kitchen stove. There t two coal trains a day, rumbling slowly along the line i'Kirby Main. Twenty-four trucks on each, with a man »g on the last one to make sure no-one tried to climb the wagons. There had been accidents in the past, Joe ; kids who'd dared each other to jump onto the trains. bey might look slow,' he said darkly, "but every one of t trucks is a forty-tonner. Never try to get up on one, y never did. Instead he found a better way, and Joe's 6 lived on it all through that summer into autumn, a they finally closed down the line altogether. Fery day, twice a day, just before the arrival of the train, would line up a row of old tin cans on the side of the ray bridge. He arranged them in pyramids, like coco- at a shy, for maximum appeal. The bored workman on the last truck could never resist the challenge they presented. Every time the train passed by he would lob chunks of coal at the cans, trying to knock them off the bridge, and Jay could always count on at least half-a-dozen good-sized pieces of coal each time. He stored these in an empty three- gallon paint tin, hidden in the bushes, and every few days, when this was full, he delivered the coal to Joe's house. It was on one of these occasions, when he was fooling about by the railway bridge, that he heard the sound of gunfire from Nether Edge and froze, the coalbox dropping from his hand. Zeth was back. 100 Lansquenet, March 1999 ULLED A HANDKERCHIEF OUT OF HIS DUFFEL BAG AND USED sstaunch the blood, beginning to feel cold now and ElQg he'd brought his Burberry. He also took out one of B|»ndwiches he had bought at the station earlier that |and forced himself to eat. It tasted foul, but the |ess receded a little and he thought he felt a little Iter. It was almost night. A sliver of moon was rising, (Bough to cast shadows, and in spite of the pain in his Ike looked around curiously. He glanced at his watch, ||t expecting to see the luminous dial of the Seiko he &r Christmas when he was fourteen, the one Zeth broke Og that last, most dreadful week of August. But the X was not luminous. Trop tacky, mon cher. Kerry iys went for class. t^he shadows at the corner of the building something |li. He called out, 'Hey!' hoisting himself up onto his feteg and limping towards the house. 'Hey! Please! Wait! |yone there?' paething smacked against the side of the building |sthe same flat sound he heard before. A shutter, ftps. He thought he saw it outlined against the |te-black sky, flapping loosely in the breeze. He shivered. No-one there after all. If only he could get into the house, out of the cold. The window was about three feet from the ground. There was a deep ledge inside, half blocked with debris, but he found that he could clear enough space to push through. The air smelt of paint. He moved carefully, feeling for broken glass, swinging his leg over the ledge and into the room, pulling the duffel bag in behind him. His eyes had become accustomed to the dark and he could see that the room was mostly clear, except for a table and a chair in the centre and a pile of something - sacks, maybe - in one corner. Using the chair for support, Jay moved over to the pile and found a sleeping bag and a pillow rolled snugly against the wall, along with a cardboard box which contained paint tins and a bundle of wax candles. Candles? What the hell . . . ? He reached into his jeans pocket for a lighter. It was only a cheap Bic, and almost out of fuel, but he managed to strike a flame. The candles were dry. The wick spluttered, then flared. The room was mellowly illumined. That's something, I suppose.' He could sleep here. The room was sheltered. There were blankets and bedclothes and the remains of that lunchtime's sandwiches. For a moment the pain in his foot was forgotten, and he grinned at the thought that this was home. It deserved a celebration. Rummaging through the duffel bag, he pulled out one of Joe's bottles, and cut open the seal and the green cord with the tip of his penknife. The clear scent of elderflower filled the air. He drank a little, tasting that familiar, cloying flavour, like fruit left to rot in the dark. Definitely a vintage year, he told himself, and despite everything he began to laugh shakily. He drank a little more. In spite of the taste the wine was warming, musky; he sat down on the rolled- up bedding, took another mouthful and began to feel a little better. He reached into his bag again and took out the radio. He 102 turned it on, half expecting the white noise he had heard on the train all the way from Marseilles, but surprisingly the signal was clear. Not the oldies station, of course, but some kind of local French radio, a low warble of music, something he didn't recognize. Jay laughed again, feeling suddenly lightheaded. Inside the duffel bag the four remaining Specials began their chorus again, a ferment of yahoos and catcalls and war cries, redoubling in frenzy until the pitch was wild, feverish, a vulgar champagne of sounds and impressions and voices and memories, all shaken into a delirious cocktail of triumph. It pulled me along, dragging me with it, so that, for a moment, I was no longer myself - Fleurie, a respectable vintage with just a hint of blackcurrant - but a cauldron of spices, frothing and seething and going to the head in a wild flush of heat. Something was getting ready to happen. I knew it. Then, suddenly, silence. Jay looked around curiously. For a moment he shivered, as if a sudden breeze had touched him, a breeze from other places. The paint on the wall was fresh, he noticed; beside the box containing paint cans was a tray of paintbrushes, washed and neatly aligned. The brushes were not yet dry. The breeze was sharper now, smelling of smoke and the | circus, hot sugar and apples and midsummer's eve. The I radio crackled softly. "Well, lad,' said a voice from the shadows. "You took yer time.' Jay turned round so fast that he almost overbalanced. 'Steady on,' said Joe kindly. Joe?' He had not changed. He was wearing his old cap, a Thin Lizzy T-shirt, his work trousers and pit boots. In one hand he held two wineglasses. In front of him, on the table, stood the bottle of Elderflower '76. "I allus said you'd get used to it one day,' he remarked |j with satisfaction. 'Elderflower champagne. Gotta bittova kick, though, annit?' 'Joe?' l flare of joy went through him, so strong that it made bottles shake. It all made sense now, he thought riously; it was all coming together. The signs, the nories - all for this - all finally making sense. 'hen the realization slammed him back, like awakening n a dream in which everything seems on the brink of ig explained, but falls away into fragments with the ,t. of course it wasn't possible. Joe must be over eighty rs old by now. That is, if he was alive at all. Joe left, he I himself fiercely, like a thief in the night, leaving king behind but questions. iy looked at the old man in the candlelight, his bright s and the laugh-wrinkles beneath them, and for the first s he noticed that everything about him was somehow [ed - even the toes of his pit boots - with an eerie glow, nostalgia. fou're not real, are you?' he said. ie shrugged. A/hat's real?' he asked carelessly. 'No such thing, lad.' leal, as in the sense of really here.' ie watched him patiently, like a teacher with a slow >il. Jay's voice rose almost angrily. leal, as in corporeally present. As in not a figment of my ided wine-soaked imagination, or an early symptom of id-poisoning or an out-of-body experience while the real sits in a white room somewhere wearing one of those ts with no arms.' ie looked at him mildly. >o, you grew up to be a writer, then,' he remarked. 'Allus I you were a clever lad. Write any gooduns, did yer? ack in biro, and engineer's boots. From his hiding place ibove the canal Jay could not tell if he was alone or not. ^s he watched, Zeth raised his rifle and took aim at omething just beyond the towpath. Some ducks which iad been sitting by the water sprayed upwards, their rangs going like clapperboards. Zeth yelled and fired gain. The ducks went crazy. Jay stayed where he was. F Zeth wanted to shoot ducks, he thought, that was his 'usiness. He wasn't going to interfere. But as he watched e began to have his doubts. Zeth seemed to be firing not t the canal, but somewhere beyond. Past the trees and iwards the river, though the terrain there was far too pen for birds. Rabbits, maybe, thought Jay, though with ie noise he was making, surely any animal would have Iready fled. He narrowed his eyes against the lowering un, trying to make out what Zeth was doing. The bigger oy fired again, twice, and reloaded. Jay realized he was 110 standing in almost exactly the same place he himself usually hid to watch . . . The gypsies. Zeth must have been firing at the washing line strung between the nearest two caravans, for one end already trailed limply into the grass, like a bird's broken wing, flapping half-heartedly in the wind. The dog, tethered in its usual place, set up a strident barking. Jay thought he caught sight of something moving at the window of one of the caravans, a curtain pulled aside briefly and a face, pale, blurry, eyes wide in anger or dismay before the curtain was yanked back in place. There was no further movement ; from the caravans, and Zeth laughed again and began to Preload. Now Jay could hear what he was shouting. I 'Gypp-o-oh! Gypp-o-oh?' ,x Well, Jay told himself, there was nothing he could do. llEven Zeth wouldn't be crazy enough to actually hurt any- |;6ne. Firing at a washing line, that was his style. Trying to Sfrighten people. Making a fair job of it, too, he imagined. He |sthought of himself that first summer, crouching under the |lock,, and felt heat creep into his face. 1:; Dammit, there was nothing he could do. |.;' The gypsies were safe enough in their caravan. They'd psyait it out until Zeth got tired or ran out of ammunition. He P»ad to go home sometime. Besides, it was only an air rifle. l^you couldn't do any real damage with an air rifle. Not ^really. Even if you hit a person. , I mean, what was he supposed to do, anyway? ; Jay turned to go and let out a yelp of surprise. There was a 'girl crouching in the bushes not five feet behind him. He had ; been so absorbed watching Zeth that he hadn't heard her ^approach. She looked about twelve. Under a bramble of red 1 curls her face was small and blotchy, as if her freckles had kbeen stretched out of shape in an attempt to save on skin. She i Was wearing jeans and a white T-shirt so large that the sleeves ;' flapped around her thin arms. In one hand she was carrying a '; grubby red bandanna, which looked to be filled with stones. The girl was on her feet as quickly and silently as an Apache. Jay barely had time to react to her presence before she sent a stone whizzing through the air with incredible speed and accuracy to strike against his kneecap with an audible, agonizing crack. He gave another yell and fell over, clutching at his knee. The girl looked at him, a second stone ready in her hand. 'Hey,' protested Jay. 'Sorry,' said the girl, without putting down the stone. Jay rolled up the leg of his jeans to inspect the injured knee. A bruise was already rising. He glared at the girl, who returned his gaze with a flat, unrepentant look. "You shouldn't have turned round like that,' said the girl. "You took me by surprise.' 'Took you . . . I' Jay struggled for speech. The girl shrugged. 'I thought you was with him,' she said, jerking her small chin fiercely in the direction of the lock. 'Using our caravan and poor old Toffee as target practice.' Jay rolled back his trouser leg. 'Him! He's no friend of mine,' he said indignantly. "He's crazy.' 'Oh. OK.' The girl returned the stone to the bandanna. Another two rifle shots sounded, followed by Zeth's ululating war cry, 'Gypp-o-ohf The girl peered down warily through the bushes, then lifted a branch and prepared to slide underneath and down the banking. 'Hey, wait a minute.' 'What?' The girl barely glanced back. In the shadow of the bush her eyes were golden, like an owl's. 'What are you doing?' 'What do you think?' 'But I told you already.' Jay's anger at her unprovoked attack had been replaced by alarm. 'He's crazy. You don't want to have anything to do with him. He'll get tired soon enough. He'll leave you alone when that happens.' 112 The girl stared at him with undisguised contempt. 'Spect that's what you'd do?' she demanded. Well . . . yes.' She made a sound which might have been amusement or scorn, and passed effortlessly under the branch, steadying herself with her free hand as she slid down the banking, braking with her heels when she reached the scree. Jay could see where she was heading. Fifty yards down the slope there was a cutaway, which opened out right over the lock. Red shale and loose stones smattered the banking ; where the hill had been opened. A screen of thin bushes provided cover. A tricky place to reach -- if approached fast Or carelessly you could ride the scree right off the edge onto filhe stones below - but it would provide her with a good ^place to launch her attack. If that was what she was planning. It was hard to believe that she was. Jay peered fadown the banking again and caught sight of her, much tlurther down now, barely visible in the undergrowth ex^cept for her hair. Let her do it if she wanted, he told himself. tit wasn't as if he hadn't warned her. f'' jn" None of this really had anything to do with him. 'jy It was none of his business. & Sighing, he picked up the coalbox with its three-day load |and began to scramble down the rocky path behind the girl. jft He took the other path to the ash pit, shielded from view finest of the way by bushes. In any case, he thought, Zeth ^wasn't looking. He was too busy shooting and yelling. Easy '; enough, then, to get across the open expanse of the ash pit ; and under the concealed lip beyond. It wasn't as good a ^Aiding place as the girl's, but it would have to do, and with 'two of them against one even Zeth might have to concede defeat. If it was two against one. Jay tried not to think about ;: any friends Zeth might have in the area, maybe just within ^shouting distance. | He put down the can of coal chunks and settled himself close to the edge of the ash pit. Zeth sounded very close now; Jay could hear his breathing and the snicking sound f his rifle as he broke it to reload. Glancing swiftly over the dge of the ash pit he could see him, too, the back of his ead and a slice of profile, his neck glaring with acne, his ag of greasy hair. Above the lock there was no sign of the iri, and he wondered, in sudden anxiety, whether she had ane. Then he saw a flicker of something red above the Jtting and a stone zipped out of the bushes, hitting Zeth a the arm. Jay knew a moment's amazement at the accu- icy of the girl's aim before Zeth swung round with a roar ? pain and surprise. Another stone hit him in the solar lexus, and as he whipped round towards the cutting Jay irew two chunks of coal at his back. One hit, the other issed, but Jay felt a hot rush of exhilaration as he ducked iwn again. 'Kill you, you fucker!' Zeth's voice sounded both very ose and horrifyingly adult, a teenage troll in disguise. hen the girl fired again, hitting him on the ankle, missing ice, then scoring a direct hit on the side of his head, aking a sound like a pool cue potting the ball. 'You leave us alone, then!' yelled the girl from her eyrie )ove the lock. 'Bloody well leave us alone, you bastard!' Now Zeth had seen her. Jay saw him move a little closer the cutting, his rifle in his hand. He could see what Zeth as doing. He would try to move under the overhang and it of sight, reload, then jump out firing. He'd be firing ind, but all the same. Jay looked over the edge of the ash t and took aim. He hit Zeth between the shoulder blades hard as he could. 'Get lost!' he shouted deliriously, firing another coal unk over the lip of the pit. 'Go pick on someone else!' But it had been a mistake to show himself so openly. Jay w Zeth's eyes widen in recognition. 'Well, well, well.' Zeth had changed after all. He'd broad- ed out, his shoulders fulfilling the promise of his height. • looked fully adult to Jay now, fully grown and ferocious. ' smiled and began to move closer to the ash pit, rifle 'elled. He kept under the overhang now, so that the girl 114 could not target him. He was grinning. Jay threw another two pieces of coal, but his aim was off target and Zeth kept on coming. 'Get away!' 'Or what?' Zeth was close enough to see clearly into the ash pit now, with one eye on the overhang which shielded him. His grin looked like a bone sickle. He levelled his rifle with a quizzical, almost a gentle smile. 'Or what, eh? Or what?' Desperately Jay lobbed the remaining chunks of coal ' at him, but his aim was gone. They bounced off the bigger ; boy's shoulders like bullets off a tank. Jay looked into the 5; barrel of Zeth's rifle. It was only an air rifle, his mind I repeated, only an air rifle, only a poxy pellet gun. It's not as I' if it were a Colt or a Luger or anything, and anyway, he | wouldn't dare shoot. ; Zeth's finger tightened on the trigger. There was a click. At this range the gun didn't look poxy at all. It looked deadly. Suddenly there was a sound from behind him and a flurry of small rocks slid from the cutaway, scattering down onto his head and shoulders. Zeth must have stepped ^ out of the shelter of the overhang, Jay realized, into The | Girl's sights again. Funny, that leap into proper-noun Istatus. He moved back towards the edge of the pit, never | taking his eyes off Zeth. His assumption that it was The ^ Girl throwing stones from her bandanna had to be wrong: . these were not isolated flung stones, but dozens -- make that hundreds - of pebbles, shards, gravel chunks, small rocks and the occasional larger one falling down the banking in a cloud of ochre dust. Something had dislodged a part of the overhang and scree was shooting off the edge in a gathering rockslide. Above the scar he could see something moving - an oversized T-shirt, no longer very white, topped by a carroty tangle of hair. She was on her hands and knees on the banking, rabbit-kicking at the scree for all she was worth, dislodging chunks of rock and soil and dust, which fragmented onto the stones below, pelting Zeth with earth and stones and acrid orange powder. Behind the sound of falling rubble Jay could just hear her thin, fierce voice screaming triumphantly, 'Eat shit, you bastard.'' Zeth was taken completely off-balance by the attack. Dropping his rifle, his first instinct was to take shelter under the cutaway, but although the overhang protected him from thrown missiles it did nothing against the rock- fall, and he stumbled, choking, right into the thick of the falling scree. He swore, holding his arms protectively above his head, as chunks of rock suddenly came down on top of him. One piece the size of a housebrick caught him on the bony part of his elbow, and at that Zeth abruptly lost all interest in the fight. Coughing, choking and blinded by dust, clasping his injured arm to his stomach, he stumbled out from under the overhang. There came a triumphant war cry from above, followed by another avalanche of small rocks, but the battle was already won. Zeth flung a single murderous glance over his shoulder and fled. He ran up the side path until he reached the top, and only then did he stop to howl his defiance. Thar fuckin dead, atha listenin?' His voice rolled off the stones at the canal side. 'If I ever see thee again, tha fuckin dead!' The Girl gave a mocking yell from the trees. Zeth fled. 116 Lansquenet, March 1999 AWOKE TO A SPILL OF SUNSHINE ON HIS FACE. THERE WAS A Binge yellowish quality to the light, something strained 1 winey, unlike dawn's clear pallor, but he was amazed an, looking at his watch, he realized he had slept more in fourteen hours. He recalled being feverish, even deluQal, that night, and he anxiously inspected his injured k for signs of infection, but none were apparent. The Idling had subsided as he slept, and though there was Ute gaudy bruising, as well as an ugly cut, on his ankle, fe seemed to be less damage than he remembered. The ig sleep must have done him good. 8e managed to replace his boot. With it on his foot was e, but not as much as he had feared. After eating his Raining sandwich -- very stale now, but he was ravenous -- Ipicked up his things and made his way slowly back »ards the road; He left his bag and case in the bushes and tan the long walk into the village. It took almost an hour, 8l many rest stops, to reach the main street, and he had Bity of time to look at the scenery. Lansquenet is a tiny See; a single main street and a few side roads, a square with ^w shops - a chemist's, a baker's, a butcher's, a florist's - a arch between two rows of linden trees, then a long road down to the river, a cafe and some derelict houses staggering along the ragged banks towards the fields. He came up from the river, having found a place to cross where the water ran shallow over some stones, and so he came to the cafe first. A bright red-and-white awning shielded a small window, and a couple of metal tables were set out on the pavement. A sign above the door read Cafe des Marauds. Jay went in and ordered a blonde. The proprietaire behind the bar looked at him curiously, and he realized how he must look to her: unwashed and unshaven, wearing a grubby T-shirt and smelling of cheap wine. He gave her a smile, but she stared back at him doubtfully. 'My name is Jay Mackintosh,' he explained to her. "I'm English.' 'Ah, English.' The woman smiled and nodded, as if that explained everything. Her face was round and pink and shiny, like a doll's. Jay took a long drink of his beer. 'Josephine,' said the proprietaire. 'Are you ... a tourist?' She sounded as if the prospect amused her. He shook his head. 'Not exactly. I had a few problems getting here last night. I ... got lost. I had to sleep rough.' He explained briefly. Josephine looked at him with wary sympathy. Clearly she couldn't imagine getting lost in such a small, familiar place as Lansquenet. 'Do you have rooms? For the night?' She shook her head. 'Is there a hotel, then? Or a chambre d'hote?' Again that look of amusement. Jay began to understand that tourists were not in plentiful supply. Oh well. It would have to be Agen. 'Could I use your telephone, then? For a taxi?' 'Taxi?' She laughed aloud at that. 'A taxi, on a Sunday night?' Jay pointed out that it was barely six o'clock, but Josephine shook her head and laughed again. All the taxis would be on their way home, she explained. No-one would come this far for a pick-up. Village boys often made hoax 118 alls, she explained with a smile. Taxis, takeaway pizzas . . They thought it was funny. ''Oh.' There was the house, of course. His house. He had ilready slept there one night, and with the sleeping bag and he candles he could surely manage another. He could buy eod from the cafe. He would be able to collect wood and Ight a fire in the grate. There were clothes in his suitcase. a the morning he would change and go to Agen to sign the yapers and collect the keys. I, 'There was a woman, back there where I slept. Madame ||Api. I think she thought I was trespassing.' glJosephine gave him a quick look. 1?I suppose she did. But if the house is yours now--' |;S thought she was the caretaker. She was standing ard.' Jay grinned. 'To tell the truth, she wasn't very ndly.' osephine shook her head. flo. I don't suppose she was.' ||Do you know her?' ^ot really.' Aention of Marise d'Api seemed to have made Josephine ry. The doubtful look was back on her face, and she was thing at a spot on the countertop with a preoccupied air. Bit least I know she's real now,' remarked Jay cheerfully. ^ttidnight last night I thought I'd seen a ghost. I suppose e comes out in the daytime?' psephine nodded silently, still rubbing the countertop. & was puzzled at her reticence, but was too hungry to vsue the matter. IpThe bar menu was not extensive, but the plat du your - a ?rous omelette with salad and fried potatoes - was i. He bought a packet of Gauloises and a spare lighter, i Josephine gave him a cheese baguette wrapped in xed paper to take back with him, along with three ties of beer and a bag of apples. He left while it was I light, carrying his purchases in a plastic carrier, and Bde good time. He brought the rest of his luggage from its hiding place by the roadside into the house. He was feeling tired by now, and his abused ankle was beginning to protest, but he dragged the case to the house before he allowed himself to rest. The sun was gone now, the sky still pale but beginning to darken, and he gathered some wood from the pile at the back of the house and stacked it in the gaping fireplace. The wood looked freshly cut and had been stored beneath a tarpaper cover to keep it from the rain. Another mystery. He supposed Marise might have cut the wood, but could not see why she might have done so. Certainly she hardly seemed the neighbourly type. He found the empty bottle of elderflower wine in a bin at the back of the house. He didn't remember putting it there, but in the state he'd been in last night he couldn't be expected to recall everything. He hadn't been thinking rationally, he told himself. The hallucination of Joe, so real he had almost believed it at the time, was proof enough of his state of mind. The single cigarette butt he discovered in the room where he'd spent the night looked old. It might have been there for ten years. He shredded it and threw it to the wind and closed the shutters from the inside. He lit some candles, then made a fire in the grate, using old newspapers he had found in a box upstairs and the wood from the back of the house. Several times the paper flared furiously, then went out, but finally the split logs caught. Jay fed the fire carefully, with a slight feeling of surprise at the pleasure it gave him. There was something primitive in this simple act, something which reminded him of the Westerns he'd liked so much as a boy. He opened his case and put his typewriter on the table next to the bottles of wine, pleased with the effect. He almost felt he might be able to write something tonight, something new. No science fiction tonight. Jonathan Wine- sap was on vacation. Tonight he would see what Jay Mackintosh could do. He sat at the typewriter. It was a clumsy thing, Spring120 actioned, hard on the fingers. He'd kept it out of affectation at first, though it was years since he had used it regularly. Now the keys felt good beneath his hands and he typed a few lines experimentally across the ribbon. It sounded good, too. But without paper . . . The unfinished manuscript of Stout Cortez was in an envelope at the bottom of his case. He took it out, and reversed the first page as he slipped it into the slot. The machine in front of him felt like a car, a tank, a rocket. Around him the room buzzed and fizzled like dark champagne. Beneath his fingers the typewriter keys jumped and snapped. He lost track of time. Of everything. Pog Hill, Summer 1977 THE GIRL'S NAME WAS GILLY. JAY SAW HER QUITE OFTEN AFTER that, down at Nether Edge, and they sometimes played together by the canal, collecting rubbish and treasures and picking wild spinach or dandelions for the family pot. They weren't really gypsies, Gilly told him scornfully, but travellers, people who couldn't stay in one place for long and who despised the capitalist property market. Her mother, Maggie, had lived in a tepee in Wales until Gilly was born, then had decided it was time for a more stable environment for the child. Hence the trailer, an old fish van, renovated and refurbished to accommodate two people and a dog. Gilly had no father. Maggie didn't like men, she explained, because they were the instigators of the JudaeoChristian patriarchal society, hell-bent on the subjugation of women. This kind of talk always made Jay a little nervous, and he was always careful to be especially polite to Maggie in case she ever decided he was the enemy, but although she sometimes sighed over his gender, in the same way that one might over a handicapped infant, she never held it against him. Gilly got on with Joe immediately. Jay introduced them the week after the rock fight, and knew a tiny stab of jealousy at their rapport. Joe knew many of the region's itinerants, and had already begun to trade with Maggie, swapping vegetables and preserves for the afghans she knitted from thrift-shop bargains, with which Joe used to cover his tender perennials - this said with a chuckle which made Maggie squawk with laughter - on cold nights. She knew a great deal about plants, and both she and Gilly accepted Joe's talismans and perimeter-protection rituals with perfect serenity, as if such things were quite natural to them. As Joe worked in the allotment, Jay and Gilly would help him with his other tasks and he would talk to them or sing along to the radio as they collected seeds in jars or sewed charms into red flannel bags or fetched old pallets from the railway bank in which to store that season's ripening fruit. It was as if Gilly's presence had mellowed Joe somehow. There was something different in the way he spoke to her, something which excluded Jay, not unkindly, but palpably nevertheless. Perhaps because she, too, was a traveller. Perhaps simply because she was a girl. Not that Gilly conformed in any way to Jay's expectations. She was fiercely independent, always taking the lead, in spite of his seniority, physically reckless, cheerily foul- mouthed to a degree which secretly shocked his conservative upbringing, filled with bizarre beliefs and ideologies culled from her mother's diverse store. Space aliens, feminist politics, alternative religions, pendulum power, numerology, environmental issues, all had their place in Maggie's philosophy, and Gilly, in her turn, accepted them all. From her Jay learned about the ozone layer and bread- cakes mysteriously shaped like Jesus, or what she called the New Killer Threat, or shamanism, or saving the whales. In turn she was the ideal audience for his stories. They spent days together, sometimes helping Joe, but often simply loafing around by the canal, talking or exploring. They saw Zeth once more after the rock fight, some distance away by the dump, and were careful to avoid him. Surprisingly enough, Gilly wasn't in the least afraid of 123 him, but Jay was. He hadn't forgotten what Zeth had shouted the day they routed him from the lock, and he would have been perfectly happy never to set eyes on him again. Obviously, he was never going to be that lucky. 124 Lansquenet, March 1999 'WAS EARLY THE FOLLOWING MORNING WHEN HE GOT INTO AGEN. s learned from Josephine that there were only two buses a y, and after a quick coffee and a couple of croissants at iCafe des Marauds he left, eager to collect his paperwork i the agency. It took longer than Jay had expected. Legal pletion had taken place the previous day, but electricity gas had not yet been restored, and the agency was fetant to hand over keys without all the documentation England. Plus, the woman at the agency told him, ' were additional complications. His offer on the farm Itaken place at a time when another offer was under lideration - had, in fact, been accepted by the owner, Ough nothing had yet been made official. Jay's offer - Brior to this earlier one by about £5,000 - had effecty scratched this previous arrangement, but the person Ifhom the farm had been promised had called earlier that 'ning, making trouble, making threats. l.'You see, Monsieur Mackintosh,' said the agent apoloirtically. 'These small communities -- a promise of land -- iey don't understand that a casual word cannot be said to |B legally binding.' Jay nodded sympathetically. 'Besides,' Iwitinued the agent, 'the vendor, who lives in Toulouse, is a Polished and restored, he told himself, they would be beautiful, exactly the type of furniture Kerry sighed over in elegant Kensington antiques shops. Other things had been stored in boxes in corners all over the house -- tableware in an attic, tools and gardening equipment at the back of a woodshed, a whole case of linen, miraculously unspoiled, under a box of broken crockery. He pulled out stiff, starched sheets, yellowed at the creases, each one embroidered with an elaborate medallion, in which the initials D. F. twined above a garland of roses - some woman's trousseau from a hundred, two hundred, years back. There were other treasures too: sandalwood boxes of handkerchiefs; copper saucepans dulled with verdigris, an old radio from before the war, he guessed, its casing cracked to reveal valves as big as doorknobs. Best of all was a huge old spice chest of rough black oak, some of its drawers still labelled in faded brown ink - CanneJJe, Poivre Rouge, Lavande, Menthe Verte - the long-empty compartments still fragrant with the scents of those spices, some dusted with a residue which coloured his fingertips with cinnamon, ginger, paprika and turmeric. It was a lovely thing, fascinating. It deserved better than this empty, half-derelict house. Jay promised himself that when he could he would have it brought downstairs and cleaned. Joe would have loved it. Night fell: reluctantly Jay abandoned his exploration of the house. Before retiring to his camp bed he inspected his ankle again, surprised and pleased at the speed of his recovery. He barely needed the arnica cream he had bought from the chemist's. The room was warm, the fire's embers casting hot reflections onto the whitewashed walls. It was still early - no later than eight - but his fatigue had begun to catch up with him, and he lay on his camp bed, watching the fire and thinking over the next day's plans. Behind the closed shutters he could hear the wind in the orchard, but there was nothing sinister about the sound tonight. Instead it sounded eerily familiar - the wind, the sound of distant water, the night creatures calling and bickering, and, 128 beyond that, the church clock carrying distantly across the marshes. A sudden surge of nostalgia came over him -- for Gilly, for Joe, for Nether Edge and that last day on the railway below Pog Hill Lane, for all the things he never wrote about in JackappJe Joe because they were too mired in disillusion to put into words. He gave a sleepy, sour croak of laughter. JackappJe Joe never even came close to what really happened. It was a fabrication, a dream of what things should have been like, a naive re-enactment of those magical, terrible summers. It gave a meaning to what had remained meaningless. In his book, Joe was the bluff, friendly old man who steered him towards adulthood. Jay was the generic apple-pie boy, rosily, artfully ingenuous. His childhood was gilded, his adolescence charmed. Forgotten, all those times when the old man bored him, troubled him, filled him with rage. Forgotten, the times Jay was sure he was crazy. His disappearance, his betrayal, his lies; papered over, tempered with nostalgia. No wonder everyone loved that book. It was the very triumph of deceit, of whimsy over reality, the childhood we all secretly believe we had, but which none of us ever did. JackappJe Joe was the book Joe himself might have written. The worst kind of lie - half true, but lying in what really matters. Lying in the heart. Tha should ave gone back, tha knows,' said Joe matter- of-factly. He was sitting on the table next to the typewriter, a mug of tea in one hand. He'd swapped the Thin Lizzy T- shirt for one from Pink Floyd's Animals tour. 'She waited for you, and you never came. She deserved better than that, lad. Even at fifteen, you should have known that.' Jay stared at him. He looked very real. He touched his forehead with the back of his hand, but the skin was cool. 'Joe.' He knew what it was, of course. All that thinking about Joe, his subconscious desire to find him there, his reenactment of Joe's greatest fantasy. 'You never did find out where they went, did you?' "No, I never did.' It was ridiculous, talking to a fantasy, ut there was something oddly comforting in it, too. Joe eemed to listen, head cocked slightly to one side, the mug eld loosely between his fingers. 'You were the one left me. After everything you promised. bu left me. You never even said goodbye.' Even though it ras a dream, Jay could feel anger crackling in his voice. You're one to tell me I should have gone back.' Joe shrugged, unruffled. 'People move on,' he said calmly. eople go to find themselves, or lose themselves, whatever. ick your own clee-shay. Anyroad, isn't that what you're oing now? Runnin away?' "I don't know what I'm doing now,' said Jay. That Kerry, anall.' Joe continued, as if he hadn't heard. 'She 'ere another. You just never know when you've hit lucky.' He ruined. 'Did you know she wears green contact lenses?' 'What?' 'Contact lenses. Her eyes are really blue. All this time and 3U never knew.' 'This is ridiculous,' Jay muttered. 'Anyway, you're not /en here.' 'Here? Here?' Joe turned towards him, pushing his cap ack from his face in the characteristic gesture Jay rememered. He was grinning, the way he always did when he 'as about to say something outrageous. 'Who's to say 'here here is, anyroad? Who's to say you're here?' Jay closed his eyes. The old man's after-image danced riefly on his retina like a moth at a window. 'I always hated it when you talked like that,' said Jay. 'Like what?' 'All that Grasshopper mystical stuff.' Joe chuckled. 'Philosophy of the Orient, lad. Learned it off of monks in ibet, that time when I were on the road.' 'You were never on the road,' Jay said. 'Nowhere further ian the Ml, anyhow.' He fell asleep to the sound of Joe's laughter. 130 Poe Hill, Summer 1977 )E WAS IN SPLENDID FORM FOR THE FIRST PART OF THAT SUMMER. Ie seemed more youthful than Jay had ever seen him, filled rith ideas and projects. He worked on his allotment most iays, though with more caution than of old, and they took heir tea breaks in the kitchen, surrounded by tomato plants. iilly came over every couple of days, and they would go down prto the railway cutting and collect treasures in the usual way, irhich they would then bring up the banking to Joe's house. rThey had moved away from Monckton Town in May, Hlly explained, when a group of local kids had begun ftusing trouble at their previous camp. 'Bastards,' she said casually, dragging on the cigarette tley were sharing and passing it back to Jay. 'First it was .ame-calling. Big fucking deal. Then they kept banging on tie doors at night, then it was stones at the windows, then [reworks under the van. Then they poisoned our old dog, nd Maggie said enough was enough.' Gilly had started at the local comprehensive that year. 'he got on with most people, she said, but with these kids it /as different. She was casual enough about the problem, ut Jay guessed it must have got pretty bad for Maggie to love the trailer so far away. 'The worst of them - the ringleader - is a girl called Glenda,' she told him. 'She's in the year above me at school. I fought her a couple of times. No-one else dares do anything to her because of her brother.' Jay looked at her. 'You know him,' said Gilly, taking another drag on the cigarette. 'That big bastard with the tattoos.' 'Zeth.' 'Aye. At least he's left school now. I don't see him much, except down by the Edge sometimes, shooting birds.' She gave a shrug. 'I don't go there often,' she added with a touch of defensiveness. 'Not really often, anyway. I don't like to.' Nether Edge was theirs now, Jay gathered. A gang of six or seven, aged twelve to fifteen and led by Zeth's sister. At weekends they would go into the town and dare each other to shoplift small items from the newsagent's - usually sweets and cigarettes - then down to the Edge to hang out or let off fireworks. Passers-by tended to avoid them, fearing abuse or harassment. Even the usual dog-walkers avoided the place now. The news left Jay feeling strangely bereft. After the rock fight he had remained wary of the Edge, always carrying Joe's talisman in his pocket, always on the lookout for trouble. He avoided the canal, the ash pit and the lock, which seemed too risky now. He wasn't going to run into Zeth if he could help it. But Gilly wasn't afraid. Not of Zeth, or of Glenda. Her caution was for him, not for herself. Jay felt a surge of indignation. 'Well, I'm not going to stay away,' he said hotly. "I'm not afraid of a bunch of little girls. Are you?' 'Of course not!' Her denial confirmed his suspicions. Jay felt a sudden impulse to prove to her that he could hold his own as well as she could - ever since the rock fight in the ash pit he had felt that, when it came to natural aggression, she had him at a disadvantage. 'We could go tomorrow,' he suggested. 'Go to the ash pit and dig up some bottles.' 132 Gilly grinned. In the sunlight her hair glowed almost as brightly as the end of the cigarette. There was a pink stripe of sunburn over her nose. Jay felt a wave of some emotion he could not recognize wash over him, so strong that he felt slightly sick. As if something had shifted inside him, tuning into a frequency hitherto unknown and unguessed at. He felt a sudden, incomprehensible urge to touch her hair. Gilly looked at him derisively. 'You sure you're up for it?' she asked. 'You're not chicken, are you, Jay?' She pumped her arms and squawked, 'Bwrakka-bwraaak! Not even a teeny-tiny bit?' The feeling, that moment of mysterious revelation, had passed. Gilly flicked her cigarette butt into the bushes, still grinning. Jay grabbed at her and mussed her hair to hide his confusion, until she screamed and kicked him in the shin. Normality - at least what passed for normal between them - was resumed. That night he slept badly, lying awake in the dark thinking of Gilly's hair - that wonderful, gaudy shade between maple leaf and carrot - and the red shale of the scree above the ash pit, and Zeth's voice whispering I can wait and You're dead in his ears, until at last he had to get up and take out Joe's old red flannel talisman from its usual place in his satchel. He gripped it - worn and shiny with three years of handling - in the palm of his hand, and immediately felt better. Scared? Of course he wasn't. He had magic on his side. 27 Lansquenet, March 1999 I'VE BECOME FOND OF JAY. WE HAVE MATURED TOGETHER, HE and I, and in many ways we are very similar. We are complex in ways which are not immediately apparent to the casual observer. The uneducated palate finds in us a brashness, a garrulousness which belies the deeper feelings. Forgive me if I become pretentious with age, but that is what solitude does to wine, and travel and rough handling have not improved me. Some things are not meant to be bottled for too long. With Jay, of course, it was something else. With Jay it was anger. He did not remember a time when he was not angry at someone. His parents. His school. Himself. And most of all, there was Joe. Joe, who vanished thai day without warning or reason, leaving only a packet of seeds, like something out of a mad fairy tale. A bad vintage, that anger. Bad for the spirit, mine and his. The Specials sensed it, loo. On The table, the four remaining bottles waited in subdued, ominous silence, their bellies filled with dark fire. When he awoke in the morning Joe was still there. Sitting at the table with his mug of tea, elbows propped on the wood, his cap at an angle, his little half-moon reading glasses perched on the end of his nose. Dusty sunlight came through a knot-hole in the shutters and gilded one shoulder into almost-invisibility. He was made of the same airy fabric which filled his bottles; I could see right through him where the light hit him full-on, though he looked solid enough to Jay, sitting bolt upright from one dream into another. 'Morning,' said the old man. "I see what this is,' whispered Jay hoarsely. 'I'm going crazy.' Joe grinned. 'You allus were a bit daft,' he said. 'Fancy throwin them seeds out over the railway. You were supposed to keep em. Use em. If you ad of done, like you were meant to, then none of this would ever ave appened.' 'What do you mean?' Joe ignored the question. 'You know, there's still a good old crop of tuberosa rosifea growin under that railway bridge. Probly the only place in the world with such a good crop. You ought to go and see it some time. Make yerself some wine.' 'What do you mean, use them? They were only seeds.' 'Only seeds?' Joe shook his head in exasperation. 'Only seeds, after everything I taught you? Them jackapples were Specials, I telled you. I even wrote it on the packet.' 'I didn't see anything special about them,' Jay told him, pulling on his jeans. 'You never? I tell you, lad, I put a couple of them ro.sifRas in every single bottle of wine I ever made. Every bottle I ever made, since I brought em back from South America. Took me five years just to get the soil right. I tell you-"' 'Don't bother.' Jay's voice was harsh. 'You never went to South America. I'd be surprised if you ever even made it out of South Yorkshire.' Joe laughed and brought out a packet of Player's from his coat pocket. 'Mebbe not, lad,' he admitted, lighting one. 'But I saw it all the same. Saw all of them places I felled you about.' 'Course you did.' Joe shook his head sorrowfully. 'Astral travel, lad. Astral bloody travel, how the bloody else d'you think I'd be able to do it if I was underground half me bloody life?' He sounded almost angry. Jay eyed the cigarette in his hand with longing. It smelt like burning paper and Bonfire Night. "I don't believe in astral travel.' Then how'd you bloody think I got here?' Bonfire Night, licorice, frying grease, smoke and Abba singing The Name of the Game' at Number One all that month. Himself sitting in the empty dorm smoking - not out of pleasure but just because it was against the rules. Not a letter. Not a card. Not even a forwarding address. 'You're not here. I don't want to have this conversation.' Joe shrugged. 'You allus were a stubborn beggar. Allus askin for explanations. Never happy just to take things as they were. Allus wantin' to know how it worked.' Silence. Jay began to lace his boots. 'Remember them Romanies that beat the meter at Nether Edge that time?' Jay looked up for a moment. 'Yes, I remember.' 'D'you ever figure out how they did it?' Jay shook his head slowly. 'Alchemy, you said.' Joe grinned. 'Layman's alchemy.' He lit a Player's, looking smug. 'Made emselves some moulds shaped like fifty pences, see? Made em out of ice. Lad fromt council thought them fifties had melted into thin air.' He laughed hugely. 'He were right anall, wan't he?' Nether Edge, Summer 1977 JAY WALKED TO THE EDGE, JOE'S TALISMAN TUCKED SNUGLY INTO his pocket. The sun was veiled, as it was for most of that summer, but the sky was hot and pale, bleeding the air of oxygen and the countryside of colour. Fields, trees, flowers all looked to be varying shades of grainy grey, like the screen on Maggie's black-and-white portable. Above Nether Edge a small bright blur hung in the sky like a beacon. A warning, perhaps. Gilly was wearing cut-off jeans and a striped T-shirt. Her hair was tied back with a piece of red ribbon. She was eating a sherbert fountain, and her tongue was black with the licorice. 'I wasn't sure you'd make it,' she said. Jay thought of the talisman in his pocket and shrugged. They were safe, he told himself. Safe. Protected. Unseen. It had worked dozens of times before. •Why shouldn't I?' Gilly shrugged. 'They've got some kind of a den over there,' she said, jerking her head towards the canal. 'A tree house, I think, where they keep their stuff. I've seen them going there a couple of times. I dare you to go in.' It's only a poxy den, Jay. Dare you.' Her eyes gleamed slyly, that cat's-eye marble green reflecting the colourless sky. She finished the sherbert fountain and lobbed the packet into the canal, keeping the licorice stub in her mouth, like a cigar butt. 'Unlesh you're yeller,' she said, doing a passable Lee Marvin. OK.' They found the den close to the lock. It wasn't a tree house, but a small shack built from assorted dump-rubbish: corrugated cardboard, sheets of tarpaper and fibreglass. It had windows of plastic sheeting and a door taken from somebody's old shed. It looked deserted. 'Go on, then,' said Gilly. "I'll keep watch.' Jay hesitated for a moment. Gilly grinned brashly; her face looked stretched into one giant freckle. He felt suddenly dizzy at the sight of her. 'Ah, get on with it, will you?' she urged. Touching the talisman in his pocket, Jay walked resolutely towards the den. It was bigger than it had looked from the path and, despite its eccentric construction, it was solid. The door was padlocked, a heavy industrial lock which might have come from someone's coal cellar. Try the window,' said Gilly from behind him. Jay whipped round. 'I thought you were keeping watch!' Gilly shrugged. 'Ah, there's nobody here,' she said. 'Go on, try the window.' The window was just big enough to crawl through. Gilly pulled back the plastic sheeting and Jay squeezed inside. It was dark, and there was a smell of sour earth and cigarette smoke. A pile of blankets lay on the floor above a couple of 138 crates. A box of clippings. A dog-eared poster cut from a girls' magazine was stapled to one wall. Gilly put her head through the window. 'Find anything good?' she enquired pertly. Jay shook his head. He was beginning to feel uncomfortable in there, imagining himself trapped in the den as Zeth and his friends rounded the corner. 'Look in the crates,' suggested Gilly. 'That's where they keep their stuff. Magazines and cigarettes, stuff they've lifted.' Jay pushed over one of the crates. Assorted rubbish spilled out across the floor. Make-up, empty lemonade bottles, comics. A battered transistor radio, sweets in a glass jar. A paper bag filled with fireworks, bangers and jumping-jacks and Black Cats in their waxy casings. Two dozen Bic lighters. Four unopened packets of Player's. 'Take something,' said Gilly. 'Take something. It's all nicked anyway.' Jay picked up a shoebox of clippings. Rather half-heartedly he scattered them across the earth floor of the den. Then he did the same with the magazines. 'Take the cigs,' urged Gilly. 'And the lighters. We'll give them to Joe.' Jay looked at her uneasily, but the thought of her contempt was more than he could take. He pocketed cigarettes and lighters, then, at Gilly's insistence, the sweets and the fireworks. Fired by her enthusiasm he tore down the poster from the wall, stamped the records, stomped the jars. Remembering how Zeth had smashed his radio, he took the transistor as well, telling himself they owed it to him. He spilled cosmetics, crunched lipsticks underfoot, threw a tin of face powder against the wall. Gilly watched, laughing wildly. 'I wish we could see their faces,' she gasped. 'If only we could!' 'Well, we can't,' Jay reminded her, climbing quickly out of the den. 'Come on, before they get back.' He took her hand and began to pull her after him up the path to the ash pit, their stomachs suddenly filled with butterflies at the thought of what they'd done; The sensation was not altogether unpleasant, and suddenly they were both laughing like drunks, clinging to each other as they stumbled up the path. 'If only I could see Glenda's face,' spluttered Gilly. 'Next time we'll have to bring a camera or something, so we can have a permanent record.' 'Next time?' The thought killed the laughter. 'Well, of course.' She spoke as if it were the most natural thing in the world. 'We've won the first skirmish. We can't just leave it now.' He supposed he should have told her, This is where it ends, Gilly. It's too dangerous. But it was the danger which attracted her, and he was too intoxicated by her admiration to plead caution. That look in her eyes. 'What are you staring at me for?' she demanded belligerently. 'I'm not staring at you.' 'Yes, you are.' Jay grinned. 'I'm staring at the great -- big -- earwig that just landed in your hair from that bush,' he told her. 'Bastard.'' screamed Gilly, shaking her head. 'Wait a minute! It's just there,' he said, slyly knuckle- rubbing the top of her head. Gilly kicked him hard on the ankle. Again normality was restored. For a while. 140 Lansquenet, March 1999 THE NEXT THING JAY DID IN LANSQUENET WAS TO FIND A builder's yard. The house needed extensive repairs, and although he could probably manage some of the work himself, most of it would have to be done by professionals. Jay was lucky to find them to hand. He imagined it would cost a great deal more to have them come over from Agen. The yard was large and sprawling. Wood had been stacked in towers at the back. Window frames and doors propped up the walls. The main warehouse was a converted farm, low- roofed, with a sign above the door which read, clairmont MEUNUISERIEPANNEAUX-CONSTRUCTION. Unfinished furniture, fencing, concrete blocks, tiles and slates were piled messily by the door. The builder's name was Georges Clairmont. He was a short, squat man, with a mournful moustache and a white shirt, greyed with perspiration. He spoke with the thick accent of the region, but slowly, reflectively, and this gave Jay time to understand his words. Somehow everyone here knew about him already. He supposed Josephine had spread word. Clairmont's labourers - four men in paint-spattered overalls and caps turned down against the sun - watched with wary curiosity as Jay passed. He caught the word Angh'she in a rapid mutter of patois. Work - money - was limited in the village. Everyone wanted a share in Chateau Foudouin's renovation. Clairmont flapped his hand in annoyance as four pairs of eyes followed them into the woodyard. 'Back to work, hell, back to work!' Jay caught the eye of one of the labourers - a man with red hair tied back with a bandanna - and grinned. The redhead grinned back, one hand across his face to hide his expression from Clairmont. Jay followed the manager into the building. The room was large and cool, like a hangar. A small table near the door served as a desk, with papers, files and a telephone-fax machine. Next to the telephone was a bottle of wine and two small glasses. Clairmont poured out two shots and handed one to Jay. Thanks.' The wine was red-black and rich. It was good, and he said so. 'It should be,' said Clairmont. 'It was made on your land. The old proprietor, Foudouin, was well known here once. A good winemaker. Good grapes. Good land.' He sipped his wine appreciatively. 'I suppose you'll have to send someone out to see the house,' Jay told him. Clairmont shrugged. 'I know the house. Went to see it again last month. Even drew up some estimates.' He saw Jay's surprise and grinned. 'She's been working on it since December,' he said. 'Painting this, plastering that. She was so sure of her agreement with the old man.' 'Marise d'Api?' 'Who else, hell? But he'd already made a deal with his nephew. A steady income - a hundred thousand francs a year until his death -- in exchange for the house and the farm. He was too old to work. Too stubborn to leave the place. No-one else wanted it but her. There's no money in farming nowadays, and as for the house itself, hellI' Clair- 142 Bourgeois. Number four. My wife is longing to meet our new celebrity. It would make her very happy to meet you.' His grin, part humble, part acquisitive, was oddly infectious. Take dinner with us. Try my wife's gesiers farcis. Caro knows everything there is to know in the village. Get to know Lansquenet.' IAY EXPECTED A SIMPLE MEAL. POT LUCK WITH THE BUILDER AND HIS wife, who would be small and drab, in an apron and headscarf, or sweet-faced and rosy, like Josephine at the cafe, with bright bird's eyes. They would perhaps be shy at first, speaking little, the wife pouring soup into earthenware bowls, blushing with pleasure at his compliments. There would be home-made terrines and red wine and olives and pimentoes in their spiced oils. Later they would tell their neighbours that the new Englishman was un mec sympathique, pas du tout pretentieux, and he would be quickly accepted as a member of the community. The reality was quite different. The door was opened by a plump, elegant lady, twin- setted and stillettoed in powder-blue, who exclaimed as she saw him. Her husband, looking more mournful than ever in a dark suit and tie, waved to him over his wife's shoulder. From inside Jay could hear music and voices, and glimpse an interior of such relentless chintziness that he blinked. In his black jeans and T-shirt, under a simple black jacket, he felt uncomfortably underdressed. There were three other guests as well as Jay. Caroline Clairmont introduced them as she distributed drinks - 'our friends Toinette and Lucien Merle, and Jessica Mornay, who owns a fashion shop in Agen,' -- simultaneously pressing one cheek against Jay's and a champagne cocktail into his free hand. 'We've been so looking forward to meeting you, Monsieur Mackintosh, or may I call you Jay?' He began to nod, but was swept away into an armchair. 'And, of course, you must call me Caro. It's so wonderful to have someone new in the village — someone with culture — I do think culture is so important, don't you?' 'Oh yes,' breathed Jessica Mornay, clutching at his arm with red nails too long to be anything but false. 'I mean, Lansquenet is wonderfully unspoilt, but sometimes an educated person simply longs for something more. You must tell us about yourself. You're a writer, Georges tells us?' Jay disengaged his arm and resigned himself to the inevitable. He answered innumerable questions. Was he married? No? But there was someone, surely? Jessica flashed her teeth and drew closer. To distract her he feigned interest in banalities. The Merles, small and dapper in matching cashmere, were from the north. He was a wine- buyer, working for a firm of German importers. Toinette was in some kind of local journalism. Jessica was a pillar of the village drama group — 'her Antigone was exquisite' — and did Jay write for the theatre? He outlined Jackopple Joe, which everyone had heard of but no-one had read, and provoked excited squeals from Caro when he revealed that he had begun a new book. Caro's cooking, like her house, was ornate; he did justice to the souffle au champagne and the voJ-au-vents, the gesiers farcis and the boeuf en croute — secretly regretting the home-made terrine and olives of his fantasy. He gently discouraged the ever more eager advances of Jessica Mor- nay. He was moderately witty, anecdotal. He accepted many undeserved compliments on his franpais superbe. After dinner he developed a headache, which he attempted, without success, to dull with alcohol. He found it difficult to concentrate on the ever-increasing rapidity of their French. Whole segments of conversation passed by like clouds. Fortunately his hostess was garrulous - and self- centred - enough to take his silence for rapt attention. By the time the meal was over it was almost midnight. Over coffee and petits fours the headache subsided and Jay was able to grasp the thread of the conversation once more. 145 Clairmont, his tie pulled away from the collar, his face mottled and sweaty: 'Well, all I can say is it's high time something happened to put Lansquenet on the map, hell? We've got as much going for us as Le Pinot down the road, if we could only get everybody organized.' Caro nodded agreement. Jay could understand her French better than her husband's, whose accent had thickened as his wineglass emptied. She was sitting opposite him on the arm of a chair, legs crossed and cigarette in hand. 'I'm sure that now Jay has joined our little community' she bared her teeth through the smoke - 'things will begin to progress. The tone changes. People begin to develop. God knows I've worked hard enough - for the church, for the theatre group, for the literary society. I'm sure Jay would agree to address our little writers' group one day soon?' He bared his own teeth noncommittally. "Of course you would!' Caro beamed as if Jay had answered aloud. 'You're exactly what a village like Lansquenet needs most: a breath of fresh air. You wouldn't want people to think we were keeping you all to ourseJves, would you?' She laughed, and Jessica exclaimed hungrily. The Merles nudged each other in glee. Jay had the strangest feeling that the lavish dinner had been peripheral, that in spite of the champagne cocktails and iced Sauternes and foie gras he was the real main course. 'But why Lansquenet?' It was Jessica, leaning forwards, her long blue eyes half shut against a sheet of cigarette smoke. 'Surely you would have been happier in a bigger place. Agen, maybe, or further south towards Toulouse?' Jay shook his head. 'I'm tired of cities,' he said. 'I bought this place on impulse.' 'Ah,' exclaimed Caro rapturously. 'Artistic temperament!' 'Because I wanted somewhere quiet, away from the city.' Clairmont shook his head. 'Hell, it's quiet enough,' he said. 'Too quiet for us. Property prices rock-bottom, while in Le Pinot, only forty kilometres away--' His wife explained rapidly that Le Pinot was a village on the Garonne, much beloved by foreign tourists. 'Georges does a lot of work there, don't you, Georges? He put in a swimming pool for that lovely English couple, and he helped renovate that old house by the church. If only we could generate the same kind of interest in our village.' Tourists. Swimming pools. Gift shops. Burger bars. Jay's lack of enthusiasm must have shown in his face, because Caro nudged him archly. 'I can see that our Monsieur Mackintosh is a romantic, Jessica! He loves the quaint little roads and the vineyards and the lonely farmhouses. So very English!' Jay smiled and nodded and agreed that his eccentricity was tout d fait angJais. 'But a community like ours, hell, it needs to grow.' Clairmont was drunk and earnest. 'We need investment. Money. There's no money left in farming. Our farmers make barely enough to keep alive as it is. The work is all in the cities. The young move away. Only the old people and the riff-raff stay. The itinerants, the pieds-noirs. That's what people don't want to understand. We have to progress or die, hell. Progress or die.' Caro nodded. 'But there are too many people here who can't see the way ahead,' she frowned. 'They refuse to sell their land for development, even when it's clear they can't win. When the plans were suggested to build the new Intermarche up the road they protested for so long that the Intermarche went to Le Pinot instead. Le Pinot was just like Lansquenet twenty years ago. Now look at it.' Le Pinot was the local success story. A village of 300 souls put itself on the map thanks to an enterprising couple from Paris who bought and refurbished a number of old properties to sell as holiday homes. Thanks to a strong pound, and several excellent contacts in London, these were sold or rented to wealthy English tourists, and little by little a tradition was established. The villagers soon saw the potential in this. Business expanded to serve the new 147 tourist trade. Several new cafes opened, soon followed by a couple of bed and breakfasts. Then came a scattering of speciality shops selling luxury goods to the summer trade, a restaurant with a Michelin star, and a small but luxurious hotel with a gym and a swimming pool. Local history was dredged for items of interest, and the wholly unremarkable church was revealed, by a combination of folklore and wishful thinking, to be a site of historical significance. A television adaptation of Clochemerle was filmed there, and after that there was no end to the new developments. An Intermarche within easy distance. A riding club. A whole row of holiday chalets along the river. And now, as if that wasn't enough, there were plans for an Aquadome and health spa only five kilometres away, which would bring trade all the way from Agen and beyond. Caro seemed to take Le Pinot's success as a personal insult. 'It could just as easily have been Lansquenet,' she complained, taking a petit four. 'Our village is at least as good as theirs. Our church is genuine fourteenth century. We have the ruins of a Roman aqueduct down in Les Marauds. It could have been us. Instead, the only visitors we get are the summer farmhands and the gypsies down the river.' She bit petulantly at her petit four. Jessica nodded. 'It's the people here,' she told me. 'They don't have any ambition. They think they can live exactly as their grandfathers did.' Le Pinot, Jay understood, had been so successful that the production of its local vintage, after which the village was named, had ceased altogether. 'Your neighbour is one of those people.' Caro's mouth thinned beneath the pink lipstick. 'Works half the land between here and Les Marauds, and still barely makes enough from winemaking to keep body and soul together. Lives holed up all year round in that old house of hers, with never a word to anyone. And that poor child holed up with her . . .' 148 the story itself, about the three women's faces drawn close in identical expressions of vulpine enjoyment, eyes squinched down, mouths lipsticked wide over white, well-tended teeth. It was an old story - not even an original story -- and yet it drew him. The feeling -- that sense of being yanked forwards by an invisible hand in his gut - was not entirely unpleasant. 'Go on,' he said. 'She was always at him.' Jessica took over the narrative. 'Even when they were first married. He was such an easygoing, sweet man. A big man, but I'll swear he was frightened of her. He let her get away with anything. And when the baby was born she just got worse. Never a smile. Never made friends with anyone. And the rows with Mireille! I'm sure you could hear them right across the village.' 'That's what drove him to it in the end: the rows.' 'Poor Tony.' 'She found him in the barn - what was left of him. His head half blown away by the shot. She put the baby in the crib and rode off to the village on her moped, cool as you like, to fetch help. And at the funeral, when everyone was mourning' ~ Caro shook her head - 'cold as ice. Not a word or a tear. Wouldn't pay for anything more than the plainest, cheapest funeral. And when Mireille offered to pay for something better - Lord! The fight that caused!' Mireille, Jay understood, was Marise's mother-in-law. Almost six years later, Mireille, who was seventy-one and suffered from chronic arthritis, had never spoken to her granddaughter, or even seen her except from a distance. Marise reverted to her maiden name after her husband's death. She apparently hated everyone in the village so much that she employed only itinerant labour -- and that on the condition that they ate and slept at the farm for the duration of their employment. Inevitably, there were rumours. 'I don't suppose you'll see much of her, anyway,' finished Toinette. 'She doesn't talk to anyone. She even rides over to La Percherie to buy her weekly shopping. I imagine she'll leave you well alone.' Jay walked home, despite offers from Jessica and Caro to drive him back. It was almost two, and the night was fresh and quiet. His head felt peculiarly light, and although there was no moon there was a skyful of stars. As he skirted the main square and moved downhill towards Les Marauds he became aware, with some surprise, of how dark it really was. The last street lamp stood in front of the Cafe des Marauds, and at the bottom of the hill, the river, the marshes, the little derelict houses teetering haphazardly into the water dipped into shadow so deep that it was almost blindness. But by the time he reached the river his eyes had adapted to the night. He crossed in the shallows, listening to the hisssh of the water against the banks. He found the path across the fields and followed it to the road, where a long avenue of trees stood black against the purple sky. He could hear sounds all around him: night creatures, a distant owl, mostly the sounds of wind and foliage, from which vision distracts us. The cool air had cleared his head of smoke and alcohol and he felt alert and awake, able to walk all night. As he walked, he found himself going over the last part of the evening's conversation with increasing persistence. There was something about that story, ugly as it was, which attracted him. It was primitive. Visceral. The woman living alone with her secrets; the man dead in the barn; the dark triangle of mother, grandmother, daughter . . . And all around this sweet, harsh land, these vines, orchards, rivers, these whitewashed houses, widows in black headscarves, men in overalls and drooping, nicotine-stained moustaches. The smell of thyme was pungent in the air. It grew wild by the roadside. Thyme improves the memory, Joe used to say. He used to make a syrup out of it, keeping it in a bottle in the pantry. Two tablespoonsful every morning before breakfast. The clear greenish liquid smelt exactly like the 151 night air over Lansquenet, crisp and earthy and nostalgic, like a summer day's weeding in the herb garden, with the radio on. Suddenly Jay wanted to be home. His fingers itched. He wanted to feel the typewriter keys under them, to hear the clack-clacking of the old machine in the starry silence. More than anything he wanted to catch that story. HE FOUND JOE WAITING FOR HIM, STRETCHED OUT ON THE CAMP bed, hands laced behind his head. He had left his boots by the foot of the bed, but he was wearing his old pit- helmet, cocked at a jaunty angle on his head. A yellow sticker on the front read, 'People will always need coal.' Jay felt no surprise at seeing him. His anger had gone, and instead he felt a kind of comfort, almost as if he was expecting to see him -- the ghostly apparition becoming familiar as he began to anticipate it, becoming . . . Everyday magic. He sat down at the typewriter. The story had him in its hold now and he typed rapidly, his fingers jabbing at the keys. He typed solidly for more than two hours, feeding sheet after sheet of Stout Cortez into the machine, translating it, reversing it with his own layman's alchemy. Words pranced across the page almost too fast for him to keep pace. From time to time he paused, vaguely conscious of Joe's presence on the bed beside him, though the old man said nothing while he worked. At one point he smelt smoke. Joe had lit a cigarette. At about five in the morning he made coffee in the kitchen, and when he returned to his typewriter he noticed, with a curious feeling of disappointment, that the old man had gone. She never missed. She could break a jar at fifty feet without even trying. Of course there were a few narrow escapes. Once they almost cornered Jay near the place where he hid his bike, close to the railway bridge. It was getting dark and Gilly had already gone home, but he'd found a stash of last year's coal -- maybe as much as a couple of sacksful -- in a patch of weeds, and he wanted to shift it before anyone else came across it by accident. He was too busy bagging coal chunks for Joe to notice the four girls coming out from the other side of the railway, and Glenda was almost on him before he knew it. Glenda was Jay's age, but big for a girl. Zeth's narrow features were overlaid with a meatiness which squeezed her eyes into crescents and her mouth into a pouty bud. Her slabby cheeks were already raddled with acne. It was the first time he had seen her so close, and her resemblance to her brother was almost paralysing. Her friends eyed him warily, fanning out behind Glenda, as if to cut off his escape. The bike was ten feet away, hidden in the long grass. Jay began to edge towards it. 'Iz on iz own today,' remarked one of the other girls, a skinny blonde with a cigarette butt clamped between her teeth. 'Wheer's tha girlfriend?' Jay moved closer to the bike. Glenda moved with him, skidding down the shingle of the banking towards the road. Pieces of gravel shot out from under her sneakers. She was wearing a cut-off T-shirt and her arms were red with sunburn. With those big, fishwife's arms she looked troublingly adult, as if she had been born that way. Jay feigned indifference. He would have liked to say something clever, something biting, but the words which would have come so easily in a story refused to co-operate. Instead, he scrambled down the bank to where he had hidden his bike and pulled it out of the long grass onto the road. Glenda gave a crow of rage and began to slide towards him, paddling the shingle with large, spatulate hands. Dust flew. 154 Lansquenet, March 1999 DURING THE WEEK THAT FOLLOWED JAY WROTE EVERY NIGHT. On Friday the electricity was finally restored, but by then he'd become accustomed to working by the light of the oil lamp. It was friendlier somehow, more atmospheric. The pages of his manuscript formed a tight wedge on the table top. He had almost a hundred now. On Monday Clairmont arrived with four workmen to make a start on the repairs to the house. They began with the roof, which was missing a great number of tiles. The plumbing, too, needed attention. In Agen he managed to find a car-hire company and rented a five-year-old green Citroen to carry his purchases and speed up his visits to Lansquenet. He also bought three reams of typing paper and some typewriter ribbons. He worked after dark, when Clairmont and his men had gone home, and the stack of typed pages mounted steadily. He did not reread the new pages. Fear, perhaps, that the block which had afflicted him for so many years might still be waiting. But somehow he didn't think so. Part of it was this place. Its air. The feeling of familiarity in spite of the fact that he was a stranger here. Its closeness to the past. As if Pog Hill Lane had been rebuilt here amongst the orchards and vines. On fine mornings he walked into Lansquenet to buy bread. His ankle had healed quickly and completely, leaving only the faintest of scars, and he began to enjoy the walk and to recognize some of the faces he saw along the way. Josephine told him their names, and sometimes more. As the owner of the village's only cafe, she was in an excellent position to know everything that happened. The dry-looking old man in the blue beret was Narcisse, a market gardener who supplied the local grocer and the florist. In spite of his reserve, there was wry, hidden humour in his face. Jay knew from Josephine that he was a friend of the gypsies who came downriver every summer, trading with them and offering them seasonal work in his fields. For years he and a succession of local cures battled over his tolerance of the gypsies, but Narcisse was stubborn, and the gypsies stayed. The redhaired man from Clairmont's yard was Michel Roux, from Marseilles, a traveller from the river, who stopped for a fortnight five years ago and never left. The woman with the red scarf was Denise Poitou, the baker's wife. The wan-looking fat woman in black, her eyes shaded from the sun by a wide- brimmed hat, was Mireille Faizande, Marise's mother-in- law. Jay tried to catch her eye as she passed the cafe terrasse, but she did not seem to see him. There were stories behind all of these faces. Josephine, leaning over the counter with her cup of coffee in one hand, appeared more than willing to tell them. Her early shyness of him had vanished, and she greeted him with pleasure. Sometimes, when there were not too many customers, they talked. Jay knew very few of the people she mentioned. But this did not seem to discourage Josephine. 'Do you mean I never told you about old Albert? Or his daughter?' She sounded amazed at his ignorance. 'They used to live next door to the bakery. Well, what used to be the bakery, before it became the chocoioterie. Opposite the florist's.' At first Jay simply allowed her to talk. He paid little attention, letting names, anecdotes, descriptions wash 157 past him as he sipped his coffee and watched the people go by. 'Didn't I ever tell you about Arnauld and the truffle pig? Or the time Armande dressed up as the Immaculate Conception and laid in wait for him in the churchyard? Listen . . .' There were many stories of her best friend, Vianne, who left some years ago, and of people long dead, whose names meant nothing to him. But Josephine was persistent. Perhaps she, too, was lonely. The morning habitues of the cafe were a silent lot for the most part, many of them old men. Perhaps she welcomed a younger audience. Little by little the ongoing soap opera of Lansquenet-sous-Tannes drew him in. Jay was aware he was still an oddity here. Some people stared at him in frank curiosity. Some smiled. Most were reserved, politely dour, a nod in greeting and a sidelong glance as he walked past. Most days he called at the Cafe des Marauds for a blonde or a cafe-cassis on the way back from Poitou's. The walled terrasse was small, no more than a wide piece of pavement on the narrow road, but it was a good place to sit and watch as the village came to life. Just off the main square, it was a vantage point from which everything was visible: the long hill leading down towards the marshes; the screen of trees'above the Rue des Francs Bourgeois; the church tower whose carillon rang out across the fields at seven every morning; the square, pink schoolhouse at the road's fork. At the bottom of the hill the Tannes was hazed and dimly gleaming, the fields beyond barely visible. The early sunlight was very bright, almost crude in comparison, cutting out the white fronts of the houses against their brown shadow. On the river a boat was moored, close to the huddle of derelict houses which overhung the river on their precarious wooden stilts. From the boat's chimney he could see a scrawl of smoke and smell frying fish. Between seven and eight o'clock several people, mostly women, passed by carrying loaves or paper sants from Poitou's bakery. At eight the bells Jay always recognized the churchgoers. The^ solemn reluctance to their good spring coats| shoes, their hats and berets, which defin Clairmont was always there with her hus ward in his tight shoes, she elegant in a scarves. She always greeted Jay as she p< extravagant wave and a cry of, 'How's t husband nodded briefly and hurried by, hu While Mass was in progress, a number of o themselves with tired defiance on the terra des Marauds to drink cafe-creme and play among themselves. Jay recognized Narcisi gardener, always in the same place by tl was a tattered seed catalogue in his coat pc read in silence, a cup of coffee at his elbo\ Josephine bought pains au chocolat and t. ways took two, his big brown hands oddly lifted the pastry to his mouth. He rarely sp( himself with a brief nod in the directiol customers before settling in his usual place. the schoolchildren began to pass, incong anoraks and fleeces, a procession of logos scarlet, yellow, turquoise, lime-green. They with open curiosity. Some of them laughed a] cheery derision, 'Rosbif! Rosbif as they da were about twenty children of primary-scho quenet, divided into two classes; the older 01 the school bus into Agen, its windows curious noses and thick with finger-graffiti During the day Clairmont had been owe pairs to the house. Already the ground floo and the roof was almost completed, thougl Georges was disappointed at his lack of a mont dreamed of conservatories and ind pools, Jacuzzis and piazzas and landscaped 159 he was philosophical enough when Jay told him that he had no ambition to live in a St Tropez villa. 'Bof, ce que vous aimez, a ce que ;e comprends, c'est ]e rustique,' he told Jay with a shrug. Already there was a speculative look in his eyes. Jay understood that if he didn't take a hard line with the man he would almost certainly be deluged with unwanted objects - broken crockery, milking stools, bad reproduction furniture, walking sticks, cracked tiles, chopping boards and ancient farming utensils; all the unloved and abandoned detritus of loft and cellar, granted reprieve from the bonfire by the call of Ie rustique -- which he would then be expected to buy. He should have withered him on the spot. But there was something rather touching about the man, something both humble and absurdly hopeful in the ratty black eyes gleaming above the drooping moustache, which made it impossible. Sighing, Jay resigned himself to the inevitable. On Thursday he caught sight of Marise for the first time since their initial, brief meeting. He was coming home after his morning walk, a loaf tucked under his arm. At the point at which his field backed onto hers there was a blackthorn hedge, along which a path ran parallel to the boundary. The hedge was young, three or four years at the most, the new March growth barely sufficient to form a screen. Behind it he could see the broken line where the old hedge had been, an uneven row of stumps and tussocks imperfectly hidden by a new furrow. Mentally Jay calculated the distance. Clairmont had been right. She had moved the boundary by about fifty feet. Probably when the old man first fell ill. He looked more closely through the hedge, faintly curious. The contrast between her side and his was striking. On the Foudouin side the vines were sprawling and untrimmed, their new growth barely showing, except for a few hard brown buds on the ends of the tendrils. Hers had been cut back hard, twelve inches from the ground, in readiness for the summer. There were no weeds on Marise's side of the hedge; the furrows neat I! and clean-edged, a path running along each row wide enough to allow easy passage for the tractor. On Jay's side the rows had run into each other, the uncut vines clinging lasciviously to one another across the paths. Gleeful spikes of ragwort, mint and arnica poked through the tangle. Looking back towards Marise's land, he found that he could just see the gable-end of her farm at the edge of the field, screened from full view by a stand of poplars. There were fruit trees there, too - the white of apple blossom against bare branches - and what might be a vegetable garden. A woodpile, a tractor, something else which could only be the barn. She must have heard the shot from the house. She had put the baby in the crib. Gone out. Taken her time. The image was so vivid that Jay could almost see her doing it: pulling on her boots over thick socks, the oversized jacket around her shoulders - it was winter - the frosty soil crunching under her feet. Her face was impassive, as it had been when they met that first morning. The image haunted him. In this guise Marise had already walked more than once across the pages of his new book; he felt as if he knew her, and yet they had barely spoken. But there was something in her which drew him, an irresistible air of secrecy. He wasn't sure why she made him think of Joe. That coat, perhaps, or the man's cap jammed too far over her eyes, that confusing half-familiar silhouette just glimpsed behind an angle of brick. Certainly there was no resemblance to Joe in her features. Joe could never have had that bleak, empty face. Half turning to go, Jay caught sight of something - a figure moving quickly along the other side of the hedge a few hundred yards from where he was standing. Shielded by the thin screen of bushes, he saw her before she caught sight of him. It was a warm morning and she had shed her bulky outer clothes in favour of jeans and a striped fish- erman's jumper. The change of clothing made her boyishly slender. Her red hair had been cut off inexpertly at jaw level - Jay guessed she'd probably done it herself. In that unguarded moment her face was vivid, eager. For a moment Jay barely recognized her. 161 Then her eyes flicked towards him, and it was as if a blind had been slammed down, so fast that he was left wondering if he had only imagined her before. 'Madame--' For a second she halted, looked at him with a blankness which was almost insolent. Her eyes were green, a curiously light verdigris colour. In his book he'd coloured them black. Jay smiled and reached out his hand over the hedge in greeting. 'Madame d'Api. I'm sorry if I startled you. I'm--' But before he could say anything else she had gone, turning sharply into the rows of vines without a backward glance, moving smoothly and quickly down the path towards the farmhouse. 'Madame d'Api!' he called after her. 'Madame!' She must have heard, and yet she ignored his call. He watched her for a few minutes more as she moved further and further away, then, shrugging, turned towards the house. He told himself that his disappointment was absurd. There was no reason why she should want to talk to him. He was allowing his imagination too much freedom. In the bland light of day she was nothing like the slate-eyed heroine of his story. He resolved not to think of her again. When Jay got home, Clairmont was waiting for him with a truckload of junk. He winked as Jay turned into the drive, pushing his blue beret back from his eyes. 'Hold, Monsieur Jay,' he called from the cab of his truck. 'I've found you some things for your new house!' Jay sighed. His instincts had been right. Every few weeks he would be badgered to take off Clairmont's hands a quantity of overpriced brocante masquerading as country chic. From what he could see of the truck's contents broken chairs, sweeping brushes, half-stripped doors, a really hideous papier-mache dragon head left over from some carnival or other - his suspicions hardly began to cover the dreadful reality. 'Well, I don't know,' he began. Clairmont grinned. 'You'll see. You'll love this,' he announced, jumping down from his cab. As he did, Jay saw he was carrying a bottle of wine. 'Something to put you in the mood, hell? Then we can talk business.' There was no escaping the man's persistence. Jay wanted a bath and silence. Instead there would be an hour's haggling in the kitchen, wine he didn't want to drink, then the problem of how to dispose of Clairmont's objets d'art without hurting his feelings. He resigned himself. 'To business,' said Clairmont, pouring two glasses of wine. 'Mine and yours.' He grinned. 'I'm going into antiques, hell ? There's good money in antiques in Le Pinot and Montauban. Buy cheap now, clean up when the tourists come.' Jay tried the wine, which was good. 'You could build twenty holiday chalets on that vineyard of yours,' continued Clairmont cheerily. 'Or a hotel. How'd you like the idea of your own hotel, hell?' Jay shook his head. 'I like it the way it is,' he said. Clairmont sighed. 'You and 'La Paienne d'Api,' he sighed. 'Got no vision, either of you. That land's worth a fortune in the right hands. Crazy, to keep it as it is when just a few chalets could--' Jay struggled with the word and his accent. 'La Paienne? The godless woman?' he translated hesitantly. Clairmont jerked his head in the direction of the other farm. 'Marise as was. We used to call her La Parisienne. But the other suits her better, hell? Never goes to church. Never had the baby christened. Never talks. Never smiles. Hangs on to that land out of sheer stubborn spite, when anyone else . . .' He shrugged. 'Bof. It's none of my business, hell? But I'd keep the doors locked if I were you, Monsieur Jay. She's 163 crazy. She's had her eye on that land for years. She'd do you an injury if she could.' Jay frowned, remembering the fox traps around the house. "Nearly broke Mireille's nose once,' continued Clairmont. 'Just because she went near the little girl. Never came into the village again after that. Goes into La Percherie on her motorbike. Seen her going into Agen, too.' 'Who looks after the daughter?' enquired Jay. Clairmont shrugged. 'No-one. I expect she just leaves her.' 'I'm surprised the social services haven't--' 'Bof. In Lansquenet? They'd have to come all the way over from Agen or Montauban, maybe even Toulouse. Who'd bother? Mireille tried. More than once. But she's clever. Put them off the scent. Mireille would have adopted the child if she'd been allowed. She's got the money. The family would have stood by her. But at her age, and with a deaf child on top of that, I suppose they thought--' Jay stared at him. 'A deaf child?' Clairmont looked surprised. 'Oh yes. Didn't you know? Ever since she was tiny. She's supposed to know how to look after her.' He shook his head. 'That's what keeps her here, hell? That's why she can't go back to Paris.' 'Why?' asked Jay curiously. 'Money,' said Clairmont shortly, draining his glass. 'But the farm must be worth something.' 'Oh, it is,' said Clairmont. 'But she doesn't own it. Why do you think she was so anxious to get the Foudouin place? It's on a lease. She'll be out the day it expires - unless she can get it renewed. And there isn't much chance of that after what's happened.' 'Why? Who owns the lease?' Clairmont drained his glass and licked his lips with satisfaction. 164 'Pierre-Emile Foudouin. The man who sold you your house. Mireille's great-nephew.' They went out onto the drive then, to inspect Clairmont's offerings. They were as bad as he had feared. But Jay's mind was on other things. He offered Clairmont 500 francs for the whole truckload: the builder's eyes widened briefly, but he was quickly persuaded. Winking slyly: 'An eye for a good bargain, hell?' The note disappeared into his rusty palm like a card trick. "And don't worry, hell. I can find you plenty more!' He drove off, his exhaust blatting out pink dust from the drive. Jay was left to sort out the wreckage. Even then Joe's training held good: Jay still found it hard to throw away what might conceivably be useful. Even as he determined to use the entire truckload for firewood he found himself looking speculatively over this and that. A glass-panelled door, cracked down the middle, might make a reasonable cold frame. The jars, each turned upside down on a small seedling, would give good protection from late frost. Little by little the oddments Clairmont had brought began to spread themselves around the garden and the field. He even found a place for the carnival head. He carried it carefully to the boundary between his and Marise's vineyard and set it on top of a fence post, facing towards her farm. Through the dragon's open mouth a long crepe tongue lolled redly, and its yellow eyes gleamed. Sympathetic magic, Joe would have called it, like putting gargoyles onto a church roof. Jay wondered what La Pai'enne would make of it. Pog Hill, Summer 1977 JAY'S MEMORIES OF THAT LATE SUMMER WERE BLURRY IN A WAY the previous ones were not. Several factors were to blame - the pale and troubling sky, for one thing, which made him squint and gave him headaches. Joe seemed a little distant, and Gilly's presence meant they did not have the long discussions they'd had the year before. And Gilly herself ... it seemed that as July turned into August Gilly was always at the back of his mind. Jay found himself dwelling upon her more and more. His pleasure at her company was coloured by insecurity, jealousy and other feelings he found it difficult to identify. He was in a state of perpetual confusion. He was often close to anger, without knowing why. He argued constantly with his mother, who seemed to get more deeply under his skin that summer than ever before - everything got under his skin that year - he felt raw, as if every nerve were constantly exposed. He bought the Sex Pistols' 'Pretty Vacant' and played it in his room at full volume, to the horror of his grandparents. He dreamed of piercing his ears. Gilly and he went to the Edge and warred with Glenda's gang and filled bags with useful rubbish and took them over to Joe's. Sometimes they helped Joe in the allotment, and occasionally he would talk to them about his travels and his time in Africa with the Masai, or his journeys through the Andes. But to Jay it seemed perfunctory, an afterthought, as if Joe's mind were already on something else. The perimeter ritual, too, seemed abbreviated, a minute or two at most, with a stick of incense and a sachet of sprinkler. It did not occur to him to question it then, but afterwards he realized. Joe knew. Even then he had already made the decision. One day he took Jay into his back room and showed him the seed chest again. It had been over a year since he had last done so, pointing out the thousands of seeds packaged and wrapped and labelled for planting, and in the semidarkness - the windows were still boarded up - the chest looked dusty, abandoned, the paper packages crisp with age, the labels faded. 'It dun't look like owt, does it?' said Joe, drawing his finger through the dust on the top of the chest. Jay shook his head. The room smelt airless and damp, like a place where tomatoes have been grown. Joe grinned a little sadly. "Never believe it, lad. Every one of them seeds is a goodun. You could plant em right now an they'd go up champion. Like rockets. Every one of em.' He put his hand on the boy's shoulder. "Just you remember, it's not what things look like that matters. It's what's inside. The art of it.' But Jay wasn't really listening. He never really listened that summer -- too preoccupied by his own thoughts, too sure that what he had would be there for ever. He took this wistful little aside of Joe's as just another adult homily; nodding vaguely, feeling hot and bored and choked in the airless dark, wanting to get away. Later it occurred to him that perhaps Joe had been saying goodbye. 167 Lansquenet, March 1999 JOE WAS WAITING WHEN HE REACHED THE HOUSE, LOOKING critically out of the window at the abandoned vegetable plot. 'You want to do something with that, lad,' he told Jay as he opened the door. 'Else it'll be no good this summer. You want to get it dug over and weeded while you've still got time. And them apple trees, anall. You want to check em for mistletoe. Bloody kill em if you let it.' During the past week Jay had almost become used to the old man's sudden appearances. He had even begun, in a strange way, to look forward to them, telling himself they were harmless, finding ingenious post-Jungian reasons to explain their persistence. The old Jay -theJayof'75- would have relished this. But that Jay believed in everything. He wanted to believe. Astral projection, space aliens, spells, rituals, magic. Strange phenomena were that Jay's daily business. That Jay believed - trusted. This Jay knew better. And still he continued to see the old man, regardless of belief. A part of it was loneliness, he told himself. Another was the book - that stranger growing from the manuscript of Stout Cortez. The process of writing is a little like madness, a kind of possession not altogether benign. Back in the days ofJackappJe Joe he talked to himself all the time, striding back and forth in his little Soho bedsit, with a glass in one hand, talking, arguing fiercely with himself, with Joe, with Gilly, with Zeth and Glenda, almost expecting to see them there as he looked up from the typewriter, his eyes grainy with exhaustion, his head pounding, the radio playing full blast. For a whole summer he was a little insane. But this book would be different. Easier, in a way. The characters were all around him. They marched effortlessly across the pages: Clairmont the builder, Josephine the cafe owner, Michel from Marseilles, with the red hair and the easy smile. Caro in a Hermes headscarf. Marise. Joe. Marise. There was no real plot. Instead there were a multitude of anecdotes, loosely knitted together -- some remembered from Joe and relocated to Lansquenet, some recalled by Josephine over the counter of the Cafe des Marauds, some put together from scraps. He liked to think he had caught something of the air, of the light of the place. Perhaps some of Josephine's bright, untrained narrative style. Her gossip was never tainted by malice. Her anecdotes were always warm, often amusing. He began to look forward to his visits, enough to feel a dim sense of disappointment on the days Josephine was too busy to talk. He found himself going to the cafe every day, even when he had no other excuse to be in the village. He made mental notes. When he had been in the village for a little under three weeks, he went into Agen and sent the first 150 pages of the unfilled manuscript to Nick Horneli, his agent in London. Nick handled Jonathan Winesap, as well as the royalties for Jackapple Joe. Jay had always liked him, a wryly humorous man who was in the habit of sending little cuttings from newspapers and magazines in the hope of generating new inspiration. He sent no contact address, but a posterestante address in Agen, and waited for a reply. To his disappointment, he found that Josephine would not speak to him about Marise. In the same way, there were people she rarely mentioned: the Clairmonts, Mireille Fai- 169 zande, the Merles. Herself. Whenever he tried to encourage her to talk about these people, she would find work to do in the kitchen. He felt more and more strongly that there were things - secret things - she was reluctant to discuss. 'What about my neighbour? Does she ever come to the cafe?' Josephine picked up a cloth and began to polish the gleaming surface of the bar. "I don't see her. I don't know her very well.' 'I've heard she doesn't get on with people from the village.' A shrug. 'Bof.' 'Caro Clairmont seems to know a lot about her.' Again the shrug. 'Caro makes it her business to know everything.' 'I'm curious.' Flatly: 'I'm sorry. I have to go.' 'I'm sure you must have heard something--' She faced him for a second, her cheeks flushing. Her arms were folded tightly against her body, the thumbs digging into her ribs in a defensive gesture. 'Monsieur Jay. Some people like to pry into other people's business. God knows, there was enough gossip about me once. Some people think they can judge.' He was taken aback by her sudden fierceness. Suddenly she was someone else, her face tight and narrow. It occurred to him that she might be afraid. LATER THAT NIGHT, BACK AT THE HOUSE, HE WENT OVER THEIR conversation. Joe was sitting in his usual spot on the bed, hands laced behind his neck. The radio was playing light music. The typewriter keys felt cold and dead under his fingertips. The bright thread of his narrative had finally run out. 'It's no good.' He sighed and poured coffee into his half- empty cup. 'I'm not getting anywhere.' Joe watched him lazily, his cap over his eyes. T can't write this book. I'm blocked. It doesn't make sense. It isn't going anywhere.' 170 The story, so clear in his mind a few nights before, had receded into almost nothing. His head was swimming with wakefulness. 'You should get to know her,' advised Joe. 'Forget listening to other people's talk and make up your own mind. That or kick it into touch altogether.' Jay made an impatient gesture. 'How can I do that? She obviously doesn't want to have anything to do with me. Or anyone else, for that matter.' Joe shrugged. 'Please yourself. You never did learn how to put yourself put much, did yer?' > That isn't true! I tried--' : 'You could live next door to each other for ten years and Beither of you'd make the first move.' | This is different.' Ill 'I reckon.' |» Joe got up and wandered to the radio. He fiddled with the dial for a moment before finding a clear signal. Somehow fine had the knack of locating the oldies station wherever he Happened to be. Rod Stewart was singing Tonight's the |ighf. |? 'You could try, though.' >^ "Maybe I don't want to try.' t'i 'Happen you don't.' I' Joe's voice was growing fainter, his outline fading, so that Jay could see the newly whitewashed wall behind him. At the same time the radio crackled harshly, the signal breaking up. A burr of white noise replaced the music. ' 'Joe?' The old man's voice was almost too faint to hear. 'I'll sithee, then.' ? It's what he always used to say as a sign of disapproval, or when signalling the end of a discussion. Joe?' But Joe had already gone. 171 Pog Hill, Summer 1977 IT REALLY STARTED WITH ELVIS. MID-AUGUST, THAT WAS, AND Jay's mother grieved with a vehemence which was almost genuine. Perhaps because they were the same age, he and she. Jay felt it, too, even though he'd never been an especial fan. That overcast sense of doom, the feeling that things were coming apart at the centre, unravelling like a ball of string. There was death in the air that August, a dark edge to the sky, an unidentifiable taste. There were more wasps that summer than he ever remembered before - long, curly, brown wasps which seemed to scent the end coming and turned spiteful early. Jay was stung twelve times - once in the mouth as he swigged a bottle of Coke, lucky not to be taken to Casualty - and together Gilly and he burned seven nests. Gilly and Jay started a crusade against the wasps that summer. On hot, moist afternoons, when the insects were sleepy and more docile, the two of them went wasp- ing. They would find the nests, stuff the hole with shredded newspaper and firelighters and flame the whole thing. As the fire took and smoke poured into the nest the wasps would come flying out, some buzzing and burning like German aircraft in old black-and-white war movies, darkening the air and sighing, an eerie, chill sound, as they spread, bewildered and enraged, over the war zone. Gilly and Jay lay quiet in a hollow near by, far enough away from the danger spot, but as close as they dared, watching. Needless to say, this tactic was Gilly's idea. She would squat, eyes wide and bright, as close as she could. No wasp ever stung her. She seemed as immune to them as a honey badger to bees, and as naturally lethal. Jay was secretly terrified, crouching in the hollows with his head down and pounding with black exhilaration, but the fear was addictive and they sought it time and again, clinging to each other and laughing in terror and excitement. Once, urged by Gilly, Jay put two Black Cat bangers into a nest under a dry-stone wall and lit the fuses. The nest blew apart, but smokelessly, scattering stunned and angry wasps everywhere. One managed to get into the T-shirt he was wearing and stung him again and again. It felt like being shot, and Jay screamed and rolled on the ground. But the wasp was indestructible, twitching and stinging even as he crushed it beneath his frantic body. They killed it at last by tearing off the shirt and dousing it in lighter fluid. Later Jay counted nine separate stings. Autumn loomed close, smelling of fire. 173 35 Lansquenet, April 1999 HE SAW HER AGAIN THE NEXT DAY. AS APRIL RIPENED TOWARDS May the vines had grown taller, and Jay occasionally saw her at work amongst the plants, dusting with fungicides, inspecting the shoots, the soil. She would not speak to him. She seemed enclosed in a capsule of isolation, profile turned towards the earth. He saw her in a succession of overalls, bulky jumpers, men's shirts, jeans, boots, her bright hair pulled back severely under her beret. Difficult to make out her shape beneath them. Even her hands were cartoonish in overlarge gloves. Jay tried to talk to her several times with no success. Once he called at her farm, but there was no answer to his knock, though he was sure he could hear someone behind the door. 'I'd have nothing to do with her,' said Caro Clairmont when he mentioned the incident. 'She never talks to anyone in the village. She knows what we all think of her.' They were on the terrasse of the Cafe des Marauds. Caro had taken to joining him there after church while her husband collected cakes from Poitou's. In spite of her exaggerated friendliness, there was something unpleasant about Caro which Jay could not quite analyse. Perhaps her willingness to speak ill of others. When Caro was there 174 Josephine kept her distance and Narcisse scrutinized his seed catalogue with studied indifference. But she remained one of the few people from the village who seemed happy to answer questions. And she knew all the gossip. 'You should talk to Mireille,' she advised, sugaring her coffee extravagantly. 'One of my dearest friends. Another generation, of course. The things she's had to bear from that woman. You can't imagine.' She blotted her lipstick carefully on a napkin before taking the first sip. 'I'll have to introduce you one day,' she said. As it happened, no introduction was necessary. Mireille Faizande sought him out herself a few days later, taking him completely by surprise. It was warm. Jay had begun work on his vegetable garden some days earlier, and now that the major repairs to the house were completed, he was spending a few hours a day in the garden. He hoped somehow that physical exertion might give him the insight he needed to finish his book. The radio was hanging from a nail sticking out of the side of the house, and the oldies station was playing. He had brought out a couple of bottles of beer from the kitchen, which he had left in a bucket of water to cool. Stripped to the waist, with an old straw hat he had found in the house to keep the sun from his eyes, he hadn't anticipated visitors. He was hacking at a stubborn root when he noticed her standing there. She must have been waiting for him to look up. 'Oh, I'm sorry.' Jay straightened up, surprised. 'I didn't see you.' She was a large shapeless woman, who should have looked motherly but did not. Huge breasts rolling, hips like boulders, she looked curiously solid, the comfortable wadding of fat petrified into something harder than flesh. Beneath the brim of her straw hat her mouth turned downwards, as if in perpetual grief. 'It's a long way out,' she said. 'I'd forgotten how long.' Her local accent was very pronounced, and for a moment Jay barely understood what she was saying. Behind him the radio was playing "Here Comes the Sun', and he could see Joe's shadow just behind her, the light gleaming off the bald patch at his crown. 'Madame Faizande--' 'Let's not be formal, please. Call me Mireille. I'm not disturbing you, hell?' 'No. Of course not. I was just about to call it a day, anyhow.' "Oh." Her eyes flicked briefly over the half-finished vegetable patch. 'I didn't realize you were a gardener.' Jay laughed. 'I'm not. Just an enthusiastic amateur.' 'You're not planning on maintaining the vineyard, hell?' Her voice was sharp. He shook his head. 'I'm afraid that's probably beyond me.' 'Selling it, then?' 'I don't think so.' Mireille nodded. 'Hell, I thought you might have come to some agreement,' she said. 'With her.' The words were almost toneless. Against the dark fabric of her skirt her arthritic hands twisted and moved. 'With your daughter-in-law?' Mireille nodded. 'She's always had her eye on this land,' she said. 'It's higher above the marshes than her place. It's better drained. It never floods in winter or dries up in summer. It's good land.' Jay looked at her uncertainly. 'I know there was a ... misunderstanding,' he said carefully. 'I know Marise expected . . . perhaps if she spoke to me we could arrange--' 'I will top any price she offers you for the land,' said Mireille abruptly. 'It's bad enough that she has my son's farm, hell, without having my father's land, too. My father's farm,' she repeated in a louder voice, 'which should have 176 been my son's, where he should have raised his children. If it hadn't been for her.' Jay switched the radio off and reached for his shirt. 'I'm sorry,' he said. 'I didn't realize there was a family connection.' Mireille's eyes went almost tenderly to the facade of the house. 'Don't apologize,' she said. 'It looks better now than it has in years. New paintwork, new windows, new shutters. After my mother died my father let it all go to ruin. Everything but the land. The wine. And when my poor Tony--' She broke off abruptly, her hands twisting. 'She wouldn't live in the family house, hell, no. Madame wanted ' her own house, down by the river. Tony converted one of | the barns for her. Madame wanted her flower garden, her patio, her sewing room. Every time it seemed as if the house was finished, Madame would think of something else. As if she was stalling for time. And then, at last, he brought her home.' Mireille's face twisted. 'Home to me.' | 'She's not from Lansquenet?' That would explain the I physical differences. The light eyes, small features, exotic | colouring and her accented but accurate English. ^, 'She is from Paris.' Mireille's tone conveyed all her I mistrust and resentment of the capital. 'Tony met her there , on holiday. He was nineteen.' She must not have been more than a few years older, thought Jay. Twenty-three, maybe twenty-four. Why had she married him? This farmer's boy from the country? Mireille must have read the question in his face. 'He looked older than that, Monsieur Jay. And he was handsome, hell oui. Too much for his own good. An only son. He could have had the farm, the land, everything. His father never refused him a thing. Any girl from the village would have thought herself lucky. But my Tony wanted better. Deserved better.' She broke off with a shake of the head. 'Enough, hell. I didn't come here to talk about Tony. I wanted to know if you were planning to sell the land.' 'I'm not,' he told her. 'I like owning the land, even if I don't have any serious plans for the vineyard. For a start, I enjoy the privacy.' Mireille seemed satisfied. 'You would tell me if you changed your mind, hell?' 'Of course. Look, you must be hot.' Now that she was here Jay didn't want her to go without knowing more about Tony and Marise. 'I have some wine in the cellar. Perhaps you'd like to take a glass with me?' Mireille looked at him for a moment and nodded. 'Perhaps a small glass,' she said. 'If only to be back in my father's house again.' 'I hope you'll approve,' said Jay, leading her through the doorway. THERE WAS NOTHING OF WHICH TO DISAPPROVE. JAY HAD LEFT the house much as it was, substituting modern plumbing for the ancient waterworks, but keeping the porcelain sinks, the woodstove, the pine cupboards, the scarred old kitchen table as they were. He liked the feeling of age in these things, the way each mark and scar told a story. He liked the worn-shiny flagstones on the floor, which he swept but did not attempt to cover with rugs, and though he oiled and cleaned the wood, he made no attempt to sand away the damage of years. Mireille looked at everything with a critical eye. 'Well?' asked Jay, smiling. 'Hell,' replied Mireille. 'It could have been worse. I expected plastic cupboards and a dishwasher.' 'I'll get the wine.' The cellar was dark. The new electrics had not yet been fitted, and the only lighting was a dim bulb on the end of a bitten flex. Jay reached for a bottle from the short rack by the stairs. There were only five bottles left in the rack. In his haste 178 to offer hospitality he had forgotten this; a bottle of sweet Sauternes was the last, finished the previous night as he typed far into the early hours. But his mind was on other things. He was thinking about Marise and Tony, and of how he could ask Mireille for the conclusion of her tale. His fingers tightened around my neck for a moment, then moved on. He must have forgotten about the Specials. He was certain there was another bottle of Sauternes in there somewhere, maybe an extra he had overlooked. Beside me the Specials moved imperceptibly, shifting, snugging, rubbing up against each other like sleeping cats, purring. The bottle next to me - its label read "Rosehip '74' - began to rattle. A rich golden scent of hot sugar and ^syrup reached his nostrils. Inside the bottle I could hear ; soft laughter. Jay could not hear it, of course. All the same -shis hand stopped on the bottle's neck. I could hear it 1'beneath his fingers, whispering, cajoling, shifting its shape ;;and turning its label slyly downwards as it released that Secret scent. Sauternes, it whispered seductively, lovely |yellow Sauternes from the other side of the river. Wine po loosen an old woman's tongue, wine to cool a dry throat, ?f ine mellow oaaaoil the way down. Jay picked up the bottle ith a small sound of satisfaction. ^ 'I knew I had one left.' 1^ The label was smeared, and in the dimness he did not try "to read it. He carried it up the stairs and into the kitchen, Opened, poured. A tiny chuckle emerged from the bottle's throat as the wine filled the glass. 179 36 'MY FATHER USED TO MAKE THE BEST WINE IN THE REGION,' SAID Mireille. 'When he died his brother Emile took over the land. After that it should have been Tony's.' 'I know. I'm sorry.' She shrugged. 'At least when he died it passed back to the male line,' she said. "I would have hated to think it went to her, hell?' Jay smiled, embarrassed. There seemed to be something in her which went far beyond grief. Her eyes were flaming with it. Her face was stone. He tried to imagine what it must be like to lose an only son. 'I'm surprised she stayed,' he told her. 'Afterwards.' Mireille gave a short laugh. 'Of course she stayed,' she said harshly. 'You don't know her, hell? Stayed out of sheer spite and stubbornness. Knew it was only a matter of time till my uncle died, then she'd have the estate to herself, just as she'd always wanted. But he knew what he was doing, hell. Kept her hanging on, the old dog. Made her think she could have it cheap.' She laughed again. 'But why should she want it? Why not leave the farm and move back to Paris?' Mireille shrugged. 'Who knows, hell? Maybe to spite me.' She sipped curiously at her wine. 'What is this?' 180 "Sauternes. Oh. Damn!' Jay couldn't understand how he had mistaken it. The smudgy handwritten label. The yellow cord tied round the neck. Rosehip, '74. "Oh damn. I'm sorry. I must have picked up the wrong bottle.' He tried his own glass. The taste was incredibly sweet, the texture syrupy and flecked with particles of sediment. He turned to Mireille in dismay. 'I'll open another. I do apologize. I never meant to give you this. I don't know how I could have mistaken the bottles--' 'It's quite all right.' Mireille held on to her glass. 'I like it. It reminds me of something. I'm not sure what. A medicine Tony had as a child, perhaps.' She drank again, and he \ caught the honeyed scent of the wine from her glass. i 'Please, modome. I really--' I Firmly: 'I like it.' ; Behind her, through the window, he could still see Joe jiunder the apple trees, the sun bright on his orange overalls. sJJoe waved as he saw him watching and gave him the thumbs |up. Jay corked the bottle of rosehip wine again and took lanother mouthful from his glass, reluctant somehow to gthrow it away. It still tasted terrible, but the scent was ^pungent and wonderful - waxy red berries bursting with seeds, splitting their sides with juice into the pan by the bucketful and Joe in his kitchen with the radio playing full volume - 'Kung Fu Fighting' at Number One all that month pausing occasionally to demonstrate some specious atemi learned on his travels through the Orient, and the October sunlight dazzling through the cracked panes . . . It seemed to have a similar effect on Mireille, though her palate was clearly more receptive to the wine's peculiar flavour. She took the drink in small, curious sips, each time pausing to savour the taste. Dreamily: 'Hell, it tastes like . . . rosewater. No, roses. Red roses.' 181 So he was not the only one to experience the special effect of Joe's home-brewed wine. Jay watched the old woman closely as she finished the glass, anxiously scanning her expression for possible ill effects. There were none. On the contrary, her face seemed to lose some of its habitual fixed look, and she smiled. 'Hell, fancy that. Roses. I had my own rose garden once, you know. Down there by the apple orchard. Don't know what happened to it. Everything went to ruin when my father died. Red roses, they were, with a scent, hellI I left when I married Hugues, but I used to go there and pick my roses every Sunday while they were in bloom. Then Hugues and my father died in the same year - but that was the year my Tony was born. A terrible year. But for my dear Tony. The best summer for roses I ever remember. The house was filled with them. Right to the eaves. Hell, but this is strong wine. Makes me feel quite dizzy.' Jay looked at her, concerned. 'I'll drive you home. You mustn't walk back all that way. Not in this sun.' Mireille shook her head. 'I want to walk. I'm not so old that I'm afraid of a few kilometres of road. Besides' - she jerked her head in the direction of the other farm - 'I like to see my son's house across the river. If I'm lucky I might catch sight of his daughter. From a distance.' Of course. Jay had almost forgotten there was a child. Certainly he had never seen her, either in the fields or on the way to school. 'My little Rosa. Seven years old. Haven't been close to her since my son died. Not once.' Her mouth was beginning to regain its customary sour tuck. Against her skirt her big misshapen hands moved furiously. "She knows what that's done to me. She knows. I'd have done anything for my son's child. I could have bought back the farm, hell, I could have given them money -- God knows I've no-one else to give it to.' She struggled to stand up, using her hands on the table top to hoist her bulk upwards. 'But she knows that for that she'd have to let me see the child,' continued Mireille. 'I'd find out what's happening. If they knew how she treated my Rosa; if I could only prove what she's doing--' 'Please.' Jay steadied her with a hand under her elbow. 'Don't upset yourself. I'm sure Marise looks after Rosa as well as she can.' Mireille snapped him a contemptuous look. 'What do you know about it, hell? Were you there? Were you perhaps hiding behind the barn door when my son died?' Her voice was brittle. Her arm felt like hot brick beneath his fingers. 'I'm sorry. I was only--' Mireille shook her head effortfully. 'No, it is I who should apologize. The sun and the strong wine, hell? It makes my tongue run wild. And when I think of her my blood boils - hellI ' She smiled suddenly, and Jay caught an unexpected glimpse of the charm and intelligence beneath the rough exterior. 'Forget what I said, Monsieur Jay. And let me invite you next time. Anyone can point you to my house.' Her tone allowed no refusal. 'I'd be pleased to. You can't imagine how happy I am to find someone who can bear my dreadful French.' Mireille looked at him closely for a second, then smiled. 'You may be a foreigner, but you have the heart of a Frenchman. My father's house is in good hands.' Jay watched her go, picking her way stiffly along the overgrown path towards the boundary, until she finally vanished behind the screen of trees at the end of the orchard. He wondered whether her roses still grew there. He poured his glass of wine back into the bottle and stoppered it once more. He washed the glasses and put away the gardening tools in the shed. It was only then that he realized. After days of inactivity, struggling to put together the fugitive pieces of his unfinished novel, he could see it again, bright as ever, like a lost coin shining in the dust. He ran for the typewriter. 183 I RECKON YOU COULD START EM AGAIN IF YOU WANTED,' SAID ]OE, eyeing the tangled rose hedge. 'It's been a while since they were cut back, and some of em have run to wild, but you could do it, with a bit of work.' Joe always pretended indifference to flowers. He preferred fruit trees, herbs and vegetables, things to be picked and harvested, stored, dried, pickled, bottled, pulped, made into wine. But there were always flowers in his garden all the same. Planted as if on an afterthought: dahlias, poppies, lavender, hollyhocks. Roses twined amongst the tomatoes. Sweet peas amongst the beanpoles. Part of it was camouflage, of course. Part of it a lure for bees. But the truth was that Joe liked flowers and was reluctant even to pull weeds. Jay would not have seen the rose garden if he had not known where to look. The wall against which the roses had once been trained had been partly knocked down, leaving an irregular section of brick about fifteen feet long. Greenery had shot up it, almost reaching the top, creating a dense thicket in which he hardly recognized the roses. With the secateurs he clipped a few briars free and revealed a single large red rose almost touching the ground. 'Old rose,' remarked Joe, peering closer. 'Best kind for cookin. You should try makin some rose-petal jam. Champion.' Jay made with the secateurs again, pulling the clinging tendrils away from the bush. He could see more rosebuds now, tight and green away from the sun. The scent from the open flower was light and earthy. He had been writing half the night. Mireille had brought enough of the story for ten pages, and it fitted easily with the rest, as if it needed only this to carry on. Without this central tale his book was no more than a collection of anecdotes, but with Marise's story to bind them together it might become a rich, absorbing novel. If only he knew where it was leading. In London he used to go to the gym to think. Here he made for the garden. Garden work clears the mind. He remem- 184 bered those summers at Pog Hill Lane, cutting and pruning under Joe's careful supervision, mixing resin for graftings, preparing herbs for the sachets with Joe's big old mortar. It felt right to do that here, too - red ribbons on the fruit trees to frighten the birds, sachets of pungent herbs for parasites. They'll need feeding, anall,' remarked Joe, leaning over the roses. 'You want to get some of that rosehip wine onto the roots. Do em no end of good. Then you'll want summat for them aphids.' Sure enough the plants were infested, the stems sticky with insect life. Jay grinned at the persistence of Joe's guiding presence. i; 'Perhaps I'll just use a chemical spray this year,' he Suggested. t "You bloody won't, though,' exclaimed Joe. 'Buggerin |teverything up with chemicals. That's not what you came there for, is it?' I" 'So what did I come here for?' I Joe made a disgusted sound. ^ 'Tha knows nowt,' he said. I 'Enough not to be caught out again,' Jay told him. 'You jtod your magic bags. Your talismans. Your travels in the JDrient. You really had me going, didn't you? You must have |(»een splitting yourself laughing all the time.' | Joe looked at him sternly over his half-moon glasses. I- "I never laughed,' he said. 'An if you'd had any sense to ilook further than the end o' yer nose—' 'Really?' Jay was getting annoyed now, tugging at the loose brambles around the rose bed with unnecessary violence. 'Then what did you leave for? Without even saying goodbye? Why did I have to come back to Pog Hill and find the house empty?' 'Oh, back to that again, are we?' Joe settled against the apple tree and lit a Player's. The radio lying in the long grass began to play 'I Feel Love', that August's Number One. 'Cut that out,' Jay told him crossly. 185 Joe shrugged. The radio whined briefly and went off. 'If only you'd planted them rosifeas, like I meant you to,' said Joe. 'I needed a bit more than a few poxy seeds,' retorted Jay. 'You allus was hard work.' Joe flipped his cigarette butt neatly over the hedge. 'I couldn't tell you I was going because I didn't know mesself. I needed to get on the move again, breathe a bit of sea air, see a bit of road. And besides, I thought I'd left you provided for. I felled yer, if only you'd planted them seeds. If only you'd had some faith.' Jay had had enough. He turned to face him. For a hallucination Joe was very real, even down to the grime under his fingernails. For some reason that enraged him all the more. "I never asked you to come!' He was shouting. He felt fifteen again, alone in Joe's cellar, with broken bottles and jars all around. 'I never asked for your help! I never wanted you here! Why are you here, anyway? Why don't you just leave me alone!' Joe waited patiently for him to finish. 'Ave you done?' he said when Jay fell silent. 'Ave you bloody done?' Jay began to cut away at the rose bushes again, not looking at him. 'Get lost, Joe,' he said, almost inaudibly. 'I bloody might, anall,' said Joe. 'Think I've not got better things to be doing? Better places to travel to? Think I've got allt time int bloody world, do yer?' His accent was thickening, as it always did on the rare occasions Jay saw him annoyed. Jay turned his back. 'Roighl,.' There was a heavy finality in the word, which made him want to turn back, but he did not. 'Please thyssen. I'll sithee.' Jay forced himself to work at the bushes for several minutes. He could hear nothing behind him but the singing of birds and the shiush of The freshening wind across the fields. Joe had gone. And this lime. Jay wasn't sure whether he ever would see him again. 37 GOING INTO AGEN THE NEXT MORNING, JAY FOUND A NOTE FROM his agent. In it Nick sounded plaintive and excited, the words underscored heavily to emphasize their importance. 'Get in touch with me. It's urgent.' Jay phoned him from Josephine's cafe. There was no phone at the farm, and he had no plans to install one. Nick sounded very faint, like a distant radio station. In the foreground Jay could hear cafe sounds, the chinking of glasses, the shuffle of draughts pieces, laughter, raised voices. "Jay! Jay, I'm so glad to hear you. It's going crazy here. The new book's great. I've sent it to half a dozen publishers already. It's--' 'It isn't finished,' Jay pointed out. That doesn't matter. It's going to be terrific. Obviously the foreign climate is doing you good. Now what I urgently need is a--' 'Wait.' Jay was beginning to feel disorientated. 'I'm not ready.' Nick must have heard something in his voice, because he slowed down then. 'Hey, take it easy. No-one's going to pressure you. No-one even knows where you are.' 'That's fine by me,' Jay told him. 'I need some more lime on my own. I'm happy here, pottering around the garden, thinking about my book.' He could hear Nick's mind clicking over the possibilities. 'OK. If that's what you want, I'll keep people away. I'll slow 187 things down. What do I tell Kerry? She's been on the phone to me every other day, demanding to know what--' 'You definitely don't tell Kerry,' Jay told him urgently. 'She's the last person I want over here.' 'Oho,' said Nick. 'What do you mean?' 'Been doing a bit of cherchez la femme, have you?' He sounded amused. 'Checking out the talent?' 'No.' 'You sure?' 'Positive.' It was true, he thought. He had hardly thought about Marise in weeks. Besides, the woman who first strode out across the pages of his book was a far cry from the recluse across the fields. It was her story he was interested in. At Nick's insistence, he gave him Josephine's number in case he needed to pass on an urgent message. Again, Nick asked when he would be able to see the rest of the manuscript. Jay couldn't tell him. He didn't even want to think about it. He already felt uncomfortable that Nick had shown it unfinished without his permission, even though he was only doing his job. He put down the phone to find that Josephine had already brought over a fresh pot of coffee to his table. Roux and Poitou were sitting there with Popotte, the postwoman. Jay knew a moment's complete disorientation. London had never seemed so far away before. He came home as usual, across the fields. It had rained during the night and the path was slippery, the hedges dripping. He skirted the road and followed the river to the border of Marise's land, enjoying the silence and the rain- heavy trees. There was no sign of Marise in the vineyard. Jay could see a small blur of smoke above the chimney of the other farm, but that was the only movement. Even the birds were silent. He was planning to cross the river at its narrowest, shallowest point, where Marise's land joined his. On either side there was a swell of banking topped by trees; a screen of fruit trees on her side and a messy tangle of hawthorn and elder on his. He noticed, as he passed, that the red ribbons he had tied to the branches had gone blown away by the wind again, most likely. He would have to find a better way of securing them. The river flattened and shallowed out at that point, and when it rained the water spread out, making islands of the clumps of reeds and digging the red soil of the riverbank to make extravagant shapes, which the sun baked hard as clay. There were stepping stones at this crossing place, worn shiny by the river and the passage of many feet, though only he passed here now. At least, so he thought. But when he reached the crossing place there was a girl squatting precariously by the riverbank, poking a stick at the silent water. At her side a small brown goat stared placidly. The movement he made alerted the child, and she stiffened. Eyes as bright and curious as the goat's fixed on him. For a moment they stared at each other, she frozen to the spot, eyes wide; Jay transfixed with an overwhelming sense of deJ'd vu. It was Gilly. She was wearing an orange pullover and green trousers rolled up to her knees. Her discarded shoes lay a short distance away in the grass. To her side lay a red rucksack, its mouth gaping. The necklace of knotted red ribbons around her neck solved the mystery of what had been happening to Jay's talismans. Looking at her more closely he could see now that she wasn't Gilly after all. The curly hair was more chestnut than red, and she was young, surely no more than eight or nine, but all the same, the resemblance was more than striking. She had the same vivid, freckled face, wide mouth, suspicious green eyes. She had the same way of looking, the same knee cocked out at an angle. Not Gilly, no, but so like her that it caught at the heart. Jay understood that this must be Rosa. 189 She fixed him with a long unsmiling stare, then grabbed for her shoes and fled. The goat shied nervously and danced across towards Jay, stopping briefly to chew at the straps of the abandoned rucksack. The girl moved as quickly as the goat, using her hands to pull herself up the slippery banking towards the fence. 'Wait!' Jay called after her. She ignored him. Quick as a weasel she was up the banking, only turning then to poke out her tongue at him in mute challenge. 'Wait!' Jay held out his hands to show her he meant no harm. 'It's all right. Don't run away.' The girl stared at him, whether in curiosity or hostility he couldn't tell, her head slightly to one side, as if in concentration. There was no way of knowing whether she had understood. 'Hello, Rosa,' said Jay. The child just stared. 'I'm Jay. I live over there.' He pointed to the farm, just visible behind the trees. She was not looking directly at him, he noticed, but at something slightly to the left and down from where he was standing. Her posture was tense, ready to pounce. Jay felt in his pocket for something to give her - a sweet, perhaps, or a biscuit - but all he could find was his lighter. It was a Bic, made of cheap coloured plastic, and it shone in the sun. 'You can have this, if you like,' he suggested, holding it out across the water. The child did not react. Maybe she couldn't lip-read, he told himself. On his side of the riverbank the goat bleated and butted gently against his legs. Rosa glanced at him, then at the goat, with a mixture of scorn and anxiety. He noticed her eyes kept moving back to the discarded rucksack, abandoned by the side of the river. He bent down and picked it up. The goat transferred its interest from Jay's legs to the sleeve of his shirt with unnerving rapidity. He held out the rucksack. 'Is this yours?' On the far bank the girl took a step forwards. 'It's all right.' }ay spoke slowly, in case she coul^ read, and smiled. 'Look. I'll bring it over.' He made stepping stones, holding the heavy rucksack in hi The goat watched him with a cynical expression. Ha as he was with the rucksack his approach was cluij looked up to smile at the girl, lost his footing on slippery stone, skidded and almost fell. The goat, was following him curiously across the stones, nudg unexpectedly, and Jay took a blind step forwarc landed squarely in the swollen river. Rosa and the goat watched in silence. Both seeme grinning. 'Damn.' Jay tried wading back to the bank. The: more current than he had expected, and he moved enly across the river stones, his boots skidding in th The rucksack seemed to be the only dry thing on his ] Rosa grinned again. The expression transformed her. It was a cu: sunny, sudden grin, her teeth very white in her d face. She laughed almost soundlessly, stamping he feet on the grass in a pantomime of mirth. Then she ^ again, picking up her shoes and clambering up the towards the orchard. The goat followed her, ni affectionately at a dangling shoelace. As they n the top, Rosa turned and waved, though whetht was a gesture of defiance or affection Jay could no When she had gone he realized he still had her rue On opening it he found inside a number of items child could treasure: a jar of snails, some pieces of river stones, string and a number of the red tali; carefully tied together with their ribbons to form a garland. Jay replaced all the treasures inside the ba; he hung the rucksack up on a gatepost close to the he the same place he had hung the dragon's head a fo earlier. He was sure Rosa would find it. 191 I HAVEN'T SEEN HER FOR MONTHS,' SAID JOSEPHINE LATER IN THE cafe. 'Marise doesn't send her to school any more. It's a pity. A little girl like that needs friends.' Jay nodded. 'She used to go to the village playgroup,' remembered Josephine. 'She must have been three, maybe a little younger. She could still talk a little then, but I don't think she could hear anything.' 'Oh?' Jay was curious. 'I thought she was born deaf.' Josephine shook her head. 'No. It was some kind of infection. It was the year Tony died. A bad winter. The river flooded again, and half of Marise's fields were underwater for three months. Plus there was that business with the police . . .' Jay looked at her enquiringly. 'Oh yes. Ever since Tony died Mireille has been trying to pin the blame on Marise. There'd been some kind of a quarrel, she said. Tony would never have killed himself. She tried to make out there was another man, or something, that together they'd conspired to murder Tony.' She shook her head, frowning. 'Mireille was half out of her mind,' she said. 'I think she would have said anything. Of course, it never came to that. The police came round, asked some questions, went away. I think they had the measure of Mireille by then. But she spent the next three or four years writing letters, campaigning, petitioning. Someone came round once or twice, that's all. But nothing came of it. She's been spreading rumours that Marise keeps the child locked up in a back room, or something.' 'I don't think that's true.' The vivid, dappled child Jay had seen gave no impression of having ever been shut up in a back room. Josephine shrugged. 'No, I don't think so either,' she said. 'But by that time the damage was done. Gangs of people gathering at the gate of the farm and across the river. Do- gooders, for the most part, harmless enough, but Marise wasn't to know that, holed up in her house, with torches burning outside and people letting off firecrackers and throwing stones at the shutters.' She shook her the time things settled down it was too late,' she e 'She was already convinced everyone was against then when Rosa disappeared . . .' Josephine poured a measure of cognac into hei suppose she thought we were all in it. You can't h in a village, and everybody knew that Mireille 1 staying with her. The child was three then, ar thought they must have made it up between them s and Rosa was there for a visit. Of course, Caro ( knew otherwise, and so did a few others, Joline E was her best friend at the time, and Cussonnet tl But the rest of us ... well, no-one asked. People that after what had happened perhaps they ough their own business. And no-one really knew N course.' 'She doesn't make it easy,' observed Jay. 'Rosa was missing for about three days. Mir tried taking her out of the house once. The first i didn't last long. You could hear her screaming rij to Les Marauds. Whatever else was wrong with had a good pair of lungs. Nothing would make her not sweets, or presents, or fussing, or shouting. tried - Caro, Joline, Toinette - but still the child stop screaming. Finally Mireille got worried and ( doctor. They put their heads together and took specialist in Agen. It just wasn't normal for a chilc to scream all the time. They thought she was distu] perhaps she'd been mistreated in some way.' She Then Marise came to pick up Rosa from the playg] found that the doctor and Mireille had taken hei instead. I've never seen anyone so angry. She folloi on her moped, but all she could find out was tha had taken Rosa to some kind of hospital. For tests, I don't know what they were trying to prove.' She shrugged again. 'If she'd been anyone else i have counted on help from the village,' she said. 'B' 193 -- never says a word unless she has to, never smiles -- I suppose people just minded their own business. That's all it was really; there was no malice in it. She wanted to be left alone, and that's what people did. Not that anyone really knew where Mireille had taken Rosa - except maybe Caro Clairmont. Oh, we heard all kinds of stories. But that was afterwards. How Marise stamped into Cussonnet's surgery with a shotgun and marched him out to the car. To hear people talking you'd think half of Lansquenet saw that. It's always the same, hellI All I can say is, I wasn't there. And though Rosa was back at home before the end of that week, we never saw her in the village again - not in the school, or even at the firework display on the fourteenth of July, or the chocolate festival at Easter.' Josephine drained her coffee abruptly and wiped her hands on her apron. 'So that was that,' she concluded with an air of finality. That was the last we saw of Marise and Rosa. I see them from time to time - perhaps once a month or so - on the road to Agen or walking to Narcisse's nursery, or in the field across the river. But that's all. She hasn't forgiven the village for what happened after Tony's death, or for taking sides, or for turning a blind eye when Rosa disappeared. You can't tell her it was nothing to do with you; she won't believe it.' Jay nodded. It was underslandable. 'It must be a lonely life for them,' he said. Thinking of Maggie and Gilly, of the way they always managed to make friends wherever they went, trading and fixing and doing odd jobs to make ends meet, always on the move, fielding insults and prejudice with the same cheery defiance. How different was this dour, suspicious woman from Joe's friends of Nether Edge. And yet the child looked so very like Gilly. He checked for the rucksack on his way back to the farm, but, as he expected, il had already been removed. Only the dragon's hi'rid remained, still lolling its long crepe tongue, now embellished with ;i garland of fluttering red ribbons, which sat jauntily on the thick green mane. Coming closer, |ay noticed that the stump of a clay pipe had been carefully positioned between the dragon's teeth, from which a dandelion clock protruded. And as he passed, hiding a grin, he was almost sure he saw something move in the hedge next to him, a brief flash of orange under the new green, and heard the impudent bleating of a goat in the distance. 195 LATER, OVER HIS FAVOURITE GRAND CREME IN THE CAFE DES Marauds, he was listening with half an ear to Josephine as she told him the story of the village's first chocolate festival and the resistance with which it had been met by the church. The coffee was good, sprinkled with shavings of dark chocolate and with a cinnamon biscuit by the side of the cup. Narcisse was sitting opposite with his usual seed catalogue and a cofe-cassis. In the III afternoons the place was busier, but Jay noticed that the clientele still consisted mainly of old men, playing chess or cards and talking in their low rapid patois. In the evening it would be full of workers back from the fields and the farms. He wondered where the young people went at night. 'Not many young people stay here,' Josephine explained. There isn't the work, unless you want to go into farming. And most of the farms have been divided so often between all the family's sons that there isn't much of a livelihood left for anyone.' 'Always the sons,' said Jay. 'Never the daughters.' 'There aren't many women who'd want to run a farm in Lansquenet,' said Josephine, shrugging. 'And some of the growers and distributors don't like the idea of working for a woman.' Jay gave a short laugh. Josephine looked at him. 'You don't believe that?' He shook his head. 'It's hard for me to understand,' he explained. 'In London--' 'This isn't London.' Josephine seemed amused. 'People hold close to their traditions here. The church. The family. The land. That's why so many of the young people leave. They want what they read about in their magazines. They want the cities, cars, clubs, shops. But there are always some who stay. And some who come back.' She poured another cafe-creme and smiled. 'There was a time when I would have given anything to get out of Lansquenet,' she said. 'Once I even set off. Packed my bags and left home.' 'What happened?' 'I stopped on the way for a cup of hot chocolate.' She laughed. "And then I realized I couldn't leave. I'd never really wanted to in the first place.' She paused to pick up some empty glasses from a nearby table. 'When you've lived here long enough you'll understand. After a time, people find it hard to leave a place like Lansquenet. It isn't just a village. The houses aren't just places to live. Everything belongs to everybody. Everyone belongs to everyone else. Even a single person can make a difference.' He nodded. It was what had first attracted him to Pog Hill Lane. The comings and goings. The conversations over the wall. The exchange of recipes, of baskets of fruit and bottles of wine. The constant presence of other people. While Joe was still there Pog Hill Lane stayed alive. Everything died with his departure. Suddenly he envied Josephine her life, her friends, her view over Les Marauds. Her memories. 'What about me?' he wondered. 'Will I make a difference?' 'Of course.' He hadn't realized he had spoken aloud. 'Everyone knows about you, Jay. Everyone asks me about you. It takes a little time for someone to be accepted here. People need to know if you're going to stay. They don't 197 want to give themselves to someone who won't stay. And some of them are afraid.' 'Of what?' 'Change. It may seem ridiculous to you, but most of us like the village the way it is. We don't want to be like Montauban or Le Pinot. We don't want tourists passing through, buying up the houses at high prices and leaving the place dead in the winter. Tourists are like a plague of wasps. They get everywhere. They eat everything. They'd clean us out in a year. There'd be nothing of us left but guest houses and games arcades. Lansquenet - the real Lansquenet -- would disappear.' She shook her head. 'People are watching you, Jay. They see you so friendly with Caro and Georges Clairmont, and they think perhaps you and they . . .' She hesitated. Then they see Mireille Faizande going to visit you, and they think how perhaps you might be planning to buy the other farm, next year, when the lease expires.' 'Marise's farm? Why should I want to do that?' he asked, curious. 'Whoever owns it controls all the land down to the river. The fast road to Toulouse is only a few kilometres away. Easy enough to develop. To build. It's happened before, in other places.' 'Not here. Not me.' Jay looked at her evenly. 'I'm here to write, that's all. To finish my book. That's all I'm interested in.' Josephine nodded, satisfied. 'I know. But you were asking so many questions about her. I thought perhaps--' 'No!' Narcisse shot him a curious glance from behind his seed catalogue. Lowering his voice quickly: 'Look. I'm a writer. I'm interested in what goes on. I like stories. That's all.' Josephine poured another coffee and sprinkled hazelnut sugar on the froth. 198 'It's the truth,' insisted Jay. 'I'm not here to make any changes. I like the place the way it is.' Josephine looked at him for a moment, then nodded, seemingly satisfied. 'All right, Monsieur Jay,' she said, smiling. 'I'll tell them you're OK.' They toasted her decision in hazelnut coffee. 199 SINCE THAT TIME AT THE STREAM JAY HAD SEEN ROSA ONLY from a distance. A few times he thought he had caught her watching from behind the hedge, and once he was sure he heard quiet footfalls from behind an angle of the house, and, of course, he had seen her leavings. The modifications to the dragon head, for instance. The little garlands of flowers and leaves and feathers left on gateposts and fences to replace the red ribbons she had stolen. Once or twice a drawing — a house, a garden, stick-children playing under improbably purple trees — tacked to a stump, the paper already curling and fading in the sunlight. There was no way of telling whether these things were offerings, toys or some way of taunting him. She was as elusive as her mother, but as curious as her goat, and their meeting must have convinced her that Jay was harmless. Once, he saw them together. Marise was working behind the hedge. For a time Jay was able to see her face. Again he realized how far this woman differed from the heroine of his book. He had time to notice the fine arch of her brows, the thin but graceful line of her mouth, the sharp angle of cheekbone, barely grazed with colour by the sun. Given the right circumstances she could be beautiful. Not round and pretty-plump like Popotte, or brown and sensual like the young girls of the village. No, hers was a grave, pale, northern beauty, small-featured beneath the blunt red hair. Something moved behind her. She sprang to her feet, whipping round as she did, and in that instant he had time to glimpse another change. She was quicker than a cat, turning defensively - not towards him, but away though even her speed didn't hide that look ... of what? Fear? It lasted less than a second. Rosa leaped at her, crowing, arms outstretched, face split in a wide, delighted grin. Another twist. Jay had imagined the child intimidated, perhaps hiding amongst the vines as he hid from Zeth in the old Nether Edge days, but that look held nothing but adoration. He watched as she climbed Marise like a tree, legs wrapped around her mother's waist, arms locked around her neck. For a moment Marise held her and he saw their profiles close together. Rosa's hands moved softly, close to her mother's face, signing in the language of the deaf. Marise snubbed Rosa's nose gently against hers. Her face was illuminated more sweetly than he could ever have imagined. Suddenly he felt ashamed at having believed, or half believed, Mireille's suggestion that Marise might be mistreating the child. Their love was something which coloured the air between them like sunlight. The interchange between them was completely, perfectly silent. Marise put Rosa down and signed to her. Jay had never watched anyone signing before, and he was struck by the grace and animation of the movements, of the facial expressions. Rosa signed back, insistently. His feeling of intrusion increased. The gestures were too quick for him to guess at the subject of the conversation. They were in their circle of privacy. Their conversation was the most intimate thing Jay had ever witnessed. Marise laughed silently, like her daughter. The expression illuminated her like sunlight through glass. Rosa rubbed her stomach as she laughed and stamped her feet. They held each other as they communicated, as if every part of the body were a part of their talk, as if, instead of losing a sense, they had gained something more. Since then he thought about them both more often. It had gone far beyond his curiosity for her story and into some thing he could not define. Josephine teased him about it. Narcisse refrained entirely from comment, but there was a knowing look in his eye when Jay talked about her. He did so too often. He could not stop himself. Mireille Faizande was the only person he knew who would talk about her interminably. Jay had been to see her several times, but could not bring himself to mention the intimate scene he witnessed between mother and daughter. When he tried to hint at a warmer relationship between them than she had portrayed, Mireille turned on him in scorn. 'What do you know about it?' she snapped. 'How can you possibly know what she's like?' Her eyes went to the fresh vase of roses by the table. There was a framed photograph beside it, showing a laughing boy sitting on a motorbike. Tony. 'She doesn't want her,' she said in a lower voice. 'Just as she didn't want my son.' Her eyes were hard. 'She took my son as she takes everything. To spoil. To play with. That's what my Rosa is to her now. Something to play with, to discard when she's had enough.' Her hands worked. "It's her fault if the child's deaf,' she said. 'Tony was perfect. It couldn't have come from his side of the family. She's vicious. She spoils everything she touches.' She glanced again at the photograph by the side of the vase. 'She'd been deceiving him all the time, you know. There was another man all along. A man from the hospital.' Jay remembered someone saying something about a hospital. A nerve clinic in Paris. 'Was she ill?' he enquired. Mireille made a scornful sound. '111? That's what Tony said. Said she needed protecting. My Tony was a rock to her, young as he was. Hell, he was strong, clear. He imagined everyone was as clear and honest as he was.' She glanced again at the roses. 'You've been busy,' she commented without warmth. 'You've brought my poor rose bushes back from the dead.' The phrase hung between them like sm( 'I tried to feel sorry for her,' said Mirei sake. But even then it wasn't easy. She'd , house, wouldn't talk to anyone, not even to f< no reason, rages. Terrible rages, screaming things. Sometimes she'd hurt herself with anything which came to hand. We had to h which could be dangerous.' 'How long were they married?' She shrugged. 'Less than a year. He cq longer. He was twenty-one when he died.' I Her hands moved again, clenching and ui| 'I can't stop thinking about it,' she said fine about both of them. He must have followed hospital. Settled somewhere close, where the Hell , I can't stop thinking that during all that ^ was married to Tony, when she was carrying bitch was laughing at him. Both of them lai boy.' She glared at me. 'You think about tha you go talking about things you don't und think about what that did to my boy.' 'I'm sorry. If you'd prefer not to talk about Mireille snorted. 'It's other people who'd fl talk about it,' she said sourly. 'Prefer not to th hell , prefer to think it's only crazy old Mird Mireille who's never been the same since hei himself. So much easier to mind your own bus her get on with her life, and never mind that s) son and ruined him just because she could, h^ she's stolen my Rosa.' Her voice cracked, whethe or grief he could not tell. Then her face smool became almost smug with satisfaction. 'But I'll show her,' she went on. 'Come next' when she needs a roof over her head. When the out. She'll have to come to me then if she wants to hell ? And she does want to stay.' Her face was sly c 'Why should she?' It seemed that whomever r zna came back to this. 'Why should she want to stay here? She has no friends. There's no-one for her here. If she wants to get away from Lansquenet, how can anyone stop her?' Mireille laughed. 'Let her want,' she said shortly. 'She needs me. She knows why.' Mireille refused to explain her final statement, and when Jay visited her again he found her guarded and uncommunicative. He understood that one of them had overstepped the mark with the other, and he tried to be more cautious in future, wooing her with roses. She accepted the gifts cheerfully enough, but made no further move to confide in him. He had to be content with what information he had already gleaned. What fascinated him most about Marise was the conflicting views of her in the village. Everyone had an opinion, though no-one, except Mireille, seemed any more informed than the others. To Caro Clairmont she was a miserly recluse. To Mireille, a faithless wife who had deliberately taken advantage of a young man's innocence. To Josephine, a brave woman raising a child alone. To Narcisse, a shrewd businesswoman with a right to privacy. Roux, who had worked her vendanges every year when he was travelling on the river, remembered her as a quiet, polite woman who carried her baby in a sling on her back, even when she was working in the fields, who brought him a cooler of beer when it was hot, who paid cash. 'Some people are suspicious of us, hell,' he said with a grin. 'Travellers on the river, always on the move. They imagine all kinds of things. They lock up their valuables. They watch their daughters. Or they try too hard. They smile too often. They slap you on the back and call you mon pote. She wasn't like that. She always called me monsieur. She didn't say much. It was business between us, man to man.' He shrugged and drained his can of Stella. Everyone he spoke to had their own image of her. Popotte remembered a morning just after the funeral, when Marise turned up outside Mireille's house with a suitcase and the baby in a carrier. Popotte was delivering letters and arrived at the house just as Marise was knocking at the door. 'Mireille opened it and fairly dragged Marise inside,' she recalled. The baby was asleep in the carrier, but the movement woke her and she started to scream. Mireille grabbed the letters from my hand and slammed the door behind them, but I could hear their voices, even through the door, and the baby screaming and screaming.' She shook her head. 'I think Marise was planning to leave that morning — she looked all ready and packed to go — but Mireille talked her out of it somehow. I know that after that she hardly came into the village at all. Perhaps she was afraid of what people were saying.' The rumours began soon after. Everyone had a story. She had an uncanny ability to arouse curiosity, hostility, envy, rage. Lucien Merle believed that her refusal to give up the uncultivated marshland by the river had blocked his plans for redevelopment. 'We could have made something of that land,' he repeated bitterly. "There's no future in farming any more. The future's in tourism.' He took a long drink of his diaboJo-menthe and shook his head. 'Look at Le Pinot. One man was all it took to ij begin the change. One man with vision.' He sighed. 'I bet that man's a millionnaire by now,' he said mournfully. Jay tried to sift through what he had heard. In some ways he felt he had gained insights into the mystery of Marise d'Api, but in others he was as ignorant as he had been from the start. None of the reports quite tallied with what he had seen. Marise had too many faces, her substance slipping away like smoke whenever he thought he had captured it. And no-one had yet mentioned what he saw in her that day, that fierce look of love for her child. And that moment of fear, the look of a wild animal which will do anything, including kill, to protect itself and its young. Fear? What could there be for her to fear in Lansquenet? He wished he knew. 205 Pog Hill, Summer 1977 IT WAS AUGUST WHEN EVERYTHING SOURED FOR GOOD. THE TIME of the wasps' nests, the den at Nether Edge, Elvis. Then the Bread Baron wrote to say that he and Candide were getting married, and for a while the papers were full of them both, snapped getting into a limo on the beachfront at Cannes, at a movie premiere, at a club in the Bahamas, on his yacht. Jay's mother gathered these articles with a collector's zeal and read and reread them, insatiably relishing Candide's hair, Candide's dresses. His grandparents took this badly, mothering his mother even more than before, and treating Jay with cool indifference, as if his father's genes were a time bomb inside him which might at any moment explode. The grey weather grew hotter, mulchy and dull. There was often rain, but it was warm and unrefreshing. Joe worked cheerlessly in his allotment; the fruit was spoiled that year, rotting on the branches and green from lack of sunlight. 'Might as well not bother, lad,' he would mutter, fingering the blackened stem of a pear or apple. 'Might as well just bloody jack it in this year.' Gilly's mother did well enough out of it, though; she'd somehow got hold of a whole truckload of those transpar- ent bell-shaped umbrellas which were so popular then and was selling them at a mighty profit in the market. Gilly reckoned they could live until December on the takings. The thought merely accentuated Jay's sense' of doom. It was only days to the end of August, and the return to school was barely a week away. Gilly would move on in the autumn - Maggie was talking about moving south to a commune she'd heard of near Abingdon, and there was no certainty she would ever come back. Jay felt prickly inside, fey one moment and the next blackly paranoid, saying the opposite of what he meant, reading mockery in everything |fcthat was said to him. He quarrelled repeatedly with Gilly ? about nothing. They made up, cautiously and incompletely, ^circling each other like wary animals, their intimacy ^broken. A sense of doom coloured everything. t On the last day of August he went to Joe's house alone, |j;|aut the old man seemed distant, preoccupied. Although it triwas raining, he did not invite Jay in, but stood with him by |t;the door in an oddly formal manner. Jay noticed that he had H?tpiled up a number of old crates by the back wall, and his §:sodding childish.' sSIt was true, he thought, he was being childish, and to l^ar it from her enraged him. That she should accept their Isparation with such ease, such indifference. Something lawned blackly inside Jay's head, yawned and grimaced. ^Fuck it, then,' he said. 'I'm off.' Feeling slightly dizzy he turned and walked off up the ranking towards the canal towpath, sure she'd call him >ack. Ten paces. Twelve. He reached the towpath, not aoking back, knowing she was watching. He passed the rees, where she couldn't see him, and turned, but Gilly was ;till sitting where she'd been before, not watching, not ollowing, just looking down into the water, hair over her Lansquenet, May 1999 I^HAD NOT SEEN JOE SINCE THE DAY AFTER MIREILLE'S VISIT, Iffirst Jay felt relieved by his absence, then as days passed tigrew uneasy. He tried to will the old man to appear, but life-remained stubbornly absent, as if his appearances were ®t a matter of Jay's choosing. His leaving left a strangeness |hind, a bereavement. At any moment Jay expected him to |:there, in the garden, looking over the vegetable patch; in |e kitchen, lifting the lid of a pan to find out what was poking. He was aware of Joe's absence as he sat at his Ipewriter, of the Joe-shaped hole in the centre of things, of |e fact that, try as he might, he could not seem to get the adio to pick up the oldies station which Joe found with Bch everyday ease. Worse, his new book had no life Without Joe. He no longer felt like writing. He wanted a link, but drunkenness merely accentuated his feeling of fss. He told himself that this was ridiculous. He could not uss what was never there in the first place. But still he Ould not shake off the feeling of something terribly lost, yribly wrong. If only you'd had some faith. That was really the problem, wasn't it? Faith. The old Jay would have had no hesitation. He believed everything. Somehow he knew he had to get back to the old Jay, to finish what they had left unfinished, Joe and he, in the summer of '77. If only he knew how. He would do anything, he promised himself. Anything at all. Finally, he brought out the last of Joe's rosehip wine. The bottle was dusty from its time in the cellar, the cord at its neck straw-coloured with age. Its contents were silent, waiting. Feeling self-conscious, but at the same time oddly •excited, Jay poured a glassful and raised it to his lips. 'I'm sorry, old man. Friends, OK?' He waited for Joe to come. He waited until dark. In the cellar, laughter. 212 42 JOSEPHINE MUST HAVE SPREAD THE WORD ABOUT HIM AT LAST. JAY Hound people becoming more friendly. Many of them teeeted him as he passed, and Poitou in the bakery, who l(r&d spoken to him only with a shopkeeper's politeness S|ifore, now asked about his book and gave him advice on ||h.atto buy. llsS'The pain aux noix is good today. Monsieur Jay. Try it |tth goat's cheese and a few olives. Leave the olives and the sEfiese on a sunny window-ledge for an hour before you eat lem to release the flavours.' He kissed his fingertips. Jihat's something you won't find in London.' IteiE'oitou 'had been a baker in Lansquenet for twenty-five ^e^rs. He had rheumatism in his fingers, but claimed that ^feitdling the dough kept them supple. Jay promised to ||aake him a grain pack which would help - another trick ||t;Joe's. Strange, how easily it all came back. With Poitou's Hlpproval came more introductions - Guillaume the ex- §S|Ehoolteacher, Darien who taught the infants' class, RoJSStoilphe the minibus driver who took the children to school |ahd brought them home every day, Nenette who was a tturse in the nearby old people's home, Briancon who kept ^Bees at the other side of Les Marauds - as if they were merely waiting for the all-clear to indulge their curiosity. Now they were all questions. What did Jay do in London? Was he married? No, but surely someone, hell? No? Astonishment. Now suspicions had been allayed they were in213 satiably curious, broaching the most personal of topics with the same innocent interest. What was his last book? How much exactly did an English writer earn? Had he been on television? And America? Had he seen America? Sighs of rapture over the reply. This information would be eagerly disseminated across the village over cups of coffee and bottles of blonde, whispered in shops, passed from mouth to mouth and elaborated upon each time in the telling. Gossip was currency in Lansquenet. More questions followed, robbed of offence by their ingenuousness. And I? Am I in your book? And I? And I? At first Jay hesitated. People don't always respond well to the idea that they have been observed, their features borrowed, their mannerisms copied. Some expect payment. Others are insulted by the portrayal. But here it was different. Suddenly everyone had a story to tell. You can put it in your book, they told him. Some even wrote them down - on scraps of notepaper, wrapping paper, once on the back of a packet of seeds. Many of these people, especially the older ones, rarely picked up a book themselves. Some, like Narcisse, had difficulty reading at all. But still the respect for books was immense. Joe was the same, his miner's background having taught him from an early age that reading was a waste of time, hiding his National Geographies under the bed, but secretly delighted by the stories Jay read to him, nodding his head as he listened, unsmiling. And though Jay never saw him read more than CuJpeper's Herbal and the odd magazine, he would occasionally come out with a quote or a literary reference which could only have come from extensive, if secret, study. Joe liked poetry in the same way he liked flowers, hiding his affection almost shamefacedly beneath a semblance of disinterest. But his garden betrayed him. Pansies stared up from the edges of cold frames. Wild roses intertwined with runner beans. Lansquenet was like Joe in this. There was a thick vein of romance running through its practicality. Jay found that almost overnight he had become someone new to cherish, to shake heads over in 214 ^bewilderment - the English writer, dingue mais sympa, ^hehf - someone who provoked laughter and awe in equal ? doses. Lansquenet's holy fool. For the moment he could do ;hao wrong. There were no more cries of Rosbif! from the ^schoolchildren. And the presents. He was overwhelmed ^ With presents. A jar of comb honey from Briancon, with an ^anecdote about his younger sister and how she once tried to Ilitprepare a rabbit - 'after over an hour in the kitchen she j|ij|ung it out of the doorway shouting, "Take it back! I can't ||piick the damn thing!" ' and a note: 'You can use it in your ^Ook.' A cake from Popotte, carried carefully in her postbag fcith the letters and balanced in her bicycle basket for the l^lurney. An unexpected gift of seed potatoes from Narcisse, 1th mumbled instructions to plant them by the sunny side Istbe house. Any offer of payment would have caused Hence. Jay tried to repay this stream of small kindnesses llybuying drinks in the Cafe des Marauds, but found he ||| .bought fewer rounds than anyone else. |i|||t*s all .right,' explained Josephine when he mentioned Hfc to her. 'It's how people are here. They need a little time |get used to you. Then . . .' She grinned. Jay was carrying a Ispping bag filled with gifts which people left for him t;der Josephine's bar - cakes, biscuits, bottles of wine, a tsjiion-cover from Denise Poitou, a terrine from Toinette BBrnaiild. She looked at the basket and her grin widened. 'I ynk we can say you've been accepted, don't you?' llThere was one exception to this new-found welcome. ll.rise d'Api remained as remote as ever. It was three leeks since he had last tried to speak to her. He had seen |iif since, but only from a distance, twice in the tractor and ||§|ace on foot, always at work in the field. Of the daughter, lathing. Jay told himself that his feeling of disappointment H^as absurd. From what he had heard Marise was hardly IgllQing to be affected by what happened in the village. Ip: "'He wrote back to Nick with another fifty pages of the l^ew manuscript. Since then progress had been slower. Part |iof this was to do with the garden. There was a great deal of I11 I'- . 215 work to be done there, and now that summer was in sight the weeds had begun to take over. Joe was right. He would need to sort it out while it was still possible. There were plenty of plants there worth saving, if he could only clear the mess. There was a square of herbs about twenty feet across, with the remains of a tiny thyme hedge around it. Three rows each of potatoes, turnips, globe artichokes, carrots and what might be celeriac. Jay seeded marigolds between the rows of potatoes to eliminate beetles, and lemon balm around the carrots for the slugs. But he needed to consider the winter's vegetables and the summer's salads. He went to Narcisse's nursery for seeds and seedlings: sprouting broccoli for September, rocket and frisee for July and August. In the cold frame he had made from Clairmont's doors he had already seeded some baby vegetables - Little Gem lettuces and fingerling carrots and parsnips -- which might be ready in a month or so. Joe was right, the land here was good. The soil was a rich russet, at the same time moist and lighter than across the river. There were fewer stones, too. The ones he found he slung onto what would become his rockery. He had almost finished restoring the rose garden. Pinned into place against the old wall the roses had begun to swell and bud; a cascade of half-opened flowers dripping against the pinkish brick to release their winey scent. They were almost free of aphids now. Joe's old recipe - lavender, lemon balm and cloves stitched into red flannel sachets and tied onto the stems just above the soil -- had worked its usual magic. Every Sunday or so he would pick a bunch of the most open blooms and take them to Mireille Faizande's house in the Place Saint-Antoine after the service. Jay was not expected to attend Mass. En tout cas, tous Jes Anglais sont paiens. The term was used with affection. Not so with La Pai'enne across the river. Even the old men on the cafe's terrasse viewed her with suspicion. Perhaps because she was a woman alone. When Jay asked outright, he found he was politely stonewalled. Mireille looked at the roses for 216 : a long time. Lifting them to her face, she breathed the scent. Her arthritic hands, oddly delicate in comparison with her bulky body, touched the petals gently. 'Thank you.' She gave a formal little nod. "My lovely roses. I'll put them into water. Come in, and I'll make some tea.' Her house was clean and airy, with the whitewashed , walls and stone floors of the region, but its simplicity was ^deceptive. An Aubusson rug hung on one wall, and there ,iwas a grandfather clock in the corner of the living room Iwhich Kerry would have sold her soul for. Mireille saw him Hooking. "That belonged to my grandmother,' she said. 'It Used to be in my nursery when I was a child. I remember Stening to the chimes when I lay awake in bed. It plays a tfferent carillon for the hour, the half and the quarter. Bay loved it.' Her mouth tightened, and she turned away larrange the roses in a bowl. 'Tony's daughter would have Bfd it.' |The tea was weak, like flower water. She served it in iisStt must have been her best Limoges, with silver tongs |fcthe sugar and lemon. |Tm sure she would. If only her mother were a little less selusive.' tNBreille looked at him. Derisively. 'Reclusive? Heh/ She's i^isocial, Monsieur Jay. Hates everyone. Her family more ISai anyone else.' She sipped her tea. 'I would have helped |r if she'd let me. I wanted to bring them both to live with e. Give the child what she needs most. A proper home. A mily. But she--' She put down the cup. Jay noticed that |||ie never called Marise by name. 'She insists on maintain- S||aig the terms of the lease. She insists she will stay until lllBiext July, when it expires. Refuses to come to the village. IgRefuses to talk to me or to my nephew, who offers to help |Aer. And afterwards, hell? She plans to buy the land from jpPierre-Emile. tWhy? She wants to be independent, she says. i^She doesn't want to owe us anything.' Mireille's face was a ftclenched fist. 'Owe us! She owes me everything. I gave her 'I'' ^ fc 217 a home. I gave her my son! There's nothing left of him now but the child. And even there she's managed to take her from us. Only she can talk to her, with that sign language she uses. She'll never know about her father and how he died. She's even fixed that. Even if I could--' The old woman broke off abruptly. 'Never mind, hellI' she said with an effort. 'She'll come round eventually. She'll have to come round. She can't hold out for ever. Not when I--' Again she broke off, her teeth snapping together with a small brittle sound. "I don't see why she should be so hostile,' said Jay at last. The village is such a friendly place. Look how friendly everyone's been to me. If she gave people a chance I'm sure they'd welcome her. It can't be easy, living on her own. You'd think she'd be pleased to know people were concerned--' 'You don't understand.' Mireille's voice was contemptuous. 'She knows what sort of welcome she'd get if she ever showed her face here. That's why she stays away. Ever since he brought her here from Paris it's been the same. She never fitted in. Never even tried. Everyone knows what she did, hell. I've made sure of that.' Her black eyes narrowed in triumph. 'Everybody knows how she murdered my son.' 218 43 WELL, SHE EXAGGERATES, YOU KNOW,' SAID CLAIRMONT peaceably. They were in the Cafe des Marauds, which was filling up rapidly with its after-work crowd, he in his ;i oil-stained overalls and blue beret, a group of his workers, Roux amongst them, gathered around a table behind him. The comfortable .reek of Gauloises and coffee filled the air. ^Someone behind them was discussing a recent football (natch. Josephine was busy microwaving pizza slices. 'Hell, Jose, un croque, to veux bien?' On the counter stood a bowl of boiled eggs and a dish of t/salt. Clairmont took one and began to peel it carefully. 'I I mean, everyone knows she didn't actually kill him. But | there are plenty of other ways than pulling the trigger, hell?' | 'Driven him to it, you mean?' | Clairmont nodded. 'He was an easy-going lad. Thought |she was perfect. Did everything for her, even after they | were married. Wouldn't hear a word spoken against her. ;.- Said she was highly strung and delicate. Well, maybe she was, hell?' He helped himself to salt from the dish. The way he was with her, you'd have thought she was glass. She'd just come out of one of those hospitals, he said. Something wrong with her nerves.' Clairmont laughed. 'Nerves, hellI Wasn't anything wrong with her nerves. But anyone dared say anything about her--' He shrugged. 'Killed himself trying to please her, poor Tony. Worked himself half to death for her, then shot himself when she 219 tried to leave him.' He bit into his egg with melancholy gusto. 'Oh yes, she was going to leave,' he added, seeing Jay's surprise. 'Had her bags all packed and ready. Mireille saw them. There'd been some row,' he explained, finishing the egg and gesturing to Josephine for a second blonde. "There was always some kind of a row going on in that place. But this time it really looked as if she was going to go through with it. Mireille--' "What is it?' Josephine was carrying a tray of microwaved pizzas, and looked flushed and tired. Two Stellas, Jose.' Josephine handed him the bottles, which he opened using the bottle-opener fixed into the bar. She gave him a narrow look before moving on with the pizzas. 'Well anyway, that was that,' finished Clairmont, pouring the beers. 'They made out it was an accident, hell, as you would. But everyone knows that crazy wife of his was behind it.' He grinned. 'The funny thing was that she didn't get a penny from his will. She's at the mercy of the family. It was a seven-year lease -- they can't do anything about that -- but when it runs out, hellI' He shrugged expressively. 'Then she'll be gone, and good riddance to her.' "Unless she buys the farm herself,' said Jay. 'Mireille said she might try.' Clairmont's face darkened for a moment. 'I'd bid against her myself if I could afford it,' he declared, draining his glass. 'That's good building land. I could build a dozen holiday chalets on that old vineyard. Pierre-Emile's an idiot if he lets it go to her.' He shook his head. 'All we need is a bit of luck and land prices in Lansquenet could rocket. Look at Le Pinot. That land could make a fortune if you developed it properly. But you'd never see her doing that. Wouldn't even give up the marshland by the river when they were thinking about widening the road. Blocked the plan out of sheer meanness.' He shook his head. 'But things are on the up now, hell?' His good humour was already restored, his grin oddly at variance with his mournful moustache. 'In a year, maybe two, we could make Le Pinot look like a Marseilles bidonville. Now that things are beginning to change.' Once again he gave his humble, eager grin. 'All it takes is one person to make a difference, Monsieur Jay. Isn't that right?' He tapped the rim of his glass against Jay's and winked. •Sante.'' 221 44 FUNNY, HOW EASILY IT ALL CAME BACK. FOUR WEEKS NOW since his last sighting of Joe and still he felt as if the old man might reappear at any moment. The red flannel sachets were in place in the vegetable garden and at the corners of the house. The trees at the land's boundary were similarly adorned, though the wind kept stripping them off. Marigolds, propagated in the home-made cold frame, were beginning to open their bright petals amongst Narcisse's seed potatoes. Poitou baked a special couronne loaf in thanks for his grain pack, which, he claimed, had given him more relief than any drug. Of course, Jay knew he would have said that anyway. Now his garden had the best collection of herbs in the village. The lavender was still green, but already more pungent than Joe's had ever been, and there was thyme and cologne mint and lemon balm and rosemary and great drifts of basil. He gave a whole basket of these to Popotte when she came by with the mail, and another to Rodolphe. Joe often gave out little charms - goodwill charms, he called them - to visitors, and Jay began to do the same: tiny bunches of lavender or mint or pineapple sage, tied with ribbons of different colours -- red for protection, white for luck, blue for healing. Funny how it all came back. People assumed this was another English custom, the general explanation for all his eccentricities. Some took to wearing these little posies pinned to their coats and jackets - though 222 it was May it was still too cool for the locals to wear their summer clothing, though Jay had long since turned to shorts and T-shirts for everyday wear. Strangely enough Jay found the return to Joe's familiar customs rather comforting. When he was a boy Joe's perimeter rituals, his incense, sachets, pig-Latin incantations and sprinklings of herbs too often irritated him. He found them embarrassing, like someone singing too fervently in school assembly. To his adolescent self, much of Joe's everyday magic seemed rather too commonplace, too natural, like cookery or gardening, stripped of its mysteries. Serious though he was about his workings, there was a cheery practicality to all of it, which made Jay's romantic soul rebel. He would have preferred solemn invocations, black robes and midnight ? ritual. That he might have believed. Reared on comic books ;, and trash fiction, that at least would have rung true. Now |"that it was too late, Jay found he had rediscovered the peace | of working with the soil. Everyday magic, Joe used to call it. t Layman's alchemy. Now he understood what the old man |\n»eant. But in spite of all this Joe stayed away. Jay prepared fcthe land for his return like a well-raked seedbed. He [Iplanted and weeded according to the lunar cycle, as Joe Spyould have done. He did everything right. He tried to have |faith. I?' He told himself that Joe was never there at all, that it was |to his imagination. But perversely, now Joe was gone he ^needed to believe it was otherwise. Joe was really there, a Impart of him insisted. Really there, and he had blown it with ' his anger and disbelief. If only he could make him come back, Jay promised himself, things would be different. There were so many things left unfinished. He felt a helpless rage at himself. He'd had a second chance, and stupidly he'd blown it. He worked in the garden every day until dusk. He was sure Joe would come. That he could make him come. 223 45 PERHAPS AS A RESULT OF DWELLING SO CONSTANTLY ON THE past, Jay found himself spending more and more time by the river, where the cutaway dropped sharply into the water. There he found a wasps' nest in the ground, under the hedge close by, and he watched it with relentless fascination, recalling that summer in 1977, and how he was stung, and Gilly's laughter at the den at Nether Edge. He lay on his stomach and watched the wasps shuttling in and out of the hole in the ground and imagined he could hear them moving just under the surface. Above them the sky was white and troubling. The remaining Specials were as silent, as troubling as the sky. Even their whispering was suspended. It was as he lay beside the riverbank that Rosa found him. His eyes were open, but he did not seem to be looking at anything. The radio, swinging from a branch overhanging the water, was playing Elvis Presley. At his side stood an opened bottle of wine. Its label, too far away for her to read it, said "Raspberry '75'. There was a red cord knotted around the neck of the bottle, which caught her eye. As she watched, the Englishman reached for the bottle and drank from it. He made a face, as if the taste were unpleasant, but from across the river she caught the scent of what he was drinking - a sudden bright flare of ripe scarlet, wild berries gathered in secret. She studied him for a moment from the other side of the river. In spite of what 224 maman told her, he looked harmless. And this was the man who tied the funny little red bags on the trees. She wondered why. At first her taking them was a defiant gesture, erasing him as much as possible from her place, but she had come to like them, their dangling shapes like small red fruit on the shaken branches. She no longer minded sharing her secret place with him. Rosa shifted her position to squat more comfortably in the long weeds on the far side of the river. She considered crossing, but the stepping stones had submerged in recent showers, and she was wary of jumping to the far bank. At her side the curious brown goat nuzzled restlessly at her sleeve. She pushed the goat away with a flapping motion of her hand. Later, CJopette, later. ' She wondered whether the Englishman knew about the ; wasps' nest. He was, after all, less than a metre from its ; opening. I Jay lifted the bottle again. It was over half empty, and lalready he felt dizzy, almost drunk. It was in part the sky | which gave him this impression, the raindrops zigzagging l4own onto his upturned face like flakes of soot. The sky |went on for ever. IS From the bottle the scent intensified, became something |which bubbled and seethed. It was a gleeful scent, a breath |i@f high summer, of overripe fruit dripping freely from the I'branches, heated from below by the sun reflecting from I the chalky stones of the railbed. This memory was not |entirely pleasant. Perhaps because of the sky he also I'-associated it with his last summer at Pog Hill, the disas- ' trous confrontation with Zeth and the wasps' nests, Gilly watching in fascination and himself crouching close by. Gilly was always the one who enjoyed wasping. Without her he would never have ventured near a wasps' nest at all. The thought somehow disturbed him. This wine should have brought back 1975, he told himself aggrievedly. That's when it was made. A bright year, full of promise and discovery. 'Sailing' playing on the radio. That's what happened before, with the other bottles. But his time machine 225 was two years out, bringing him here instead, sending Joe even further away. He poured the rest of the wine onto the ground and closed his eyes. A red chuckle from the bottom of the bottle. Jay opened his eyes again, uneasy, certain that someone was watching him. The dregs were almost black in this dull daylight, black and syrupy, like treacle, and from where he was lying there almost seemed to be movement around the neck of the bottle, as if something were trying to escape. He sat up and looked a little closer. Inside the bottle, several wasps were gathered, attracted by the scent of sugar. Two crawled stickily on the neck. Another had flown right into the belly of the bottle to investigate the residue at the bottom. Jay shivered. Wasps sometimes hide in bottles and drinks cans. He knew from that summer. A sting inside the mouth is both painful and dangerous. The wasp crawled thickly against the glass. Its wings were clotted with syrup. He thought he could hear the insect inside the bottle, buzzing in a growing frenzy, but perhaps that was the wine itself calling, its hot bright scent distressing the air, rising like a column of red smoke, a signal, perhaps, or a warning. Suddenly his closeness to the wasps' nest appalled him. He realized he could hear the insects beneath him under the soil's thin crust. He sat up, meaning to move away, but a recklessness seized him, and instead of retreating he moved a little closer. If Gilfy was here . . . Nostalgia was upon him again before he could stop it. It dragged at him like a caught bramble. Perhaps it was the scent from the bottle, from the spilled wine on the ground making him feel this way, this trapped summer scent, intoxicating, overwhelming. The radio near by gave a quick crackle of static and began to play 'I Feel Love'. Jay shivered. This was ridiculous, he told himself. He had nothing to prove. It was twenty years since he last fired a wasps' nest. It seemed a reckless, lethal thing to do now, the kind of 226 thing only a child would do, oblivious of the risks. Besides . . . A voice - from the bottle, he thought, though it might still be the wine talking - cajoling, a little scornful. It sounded something like Gilly's voice, something like Joe's. It was impatient, amused beneath the irritation. If Gilly was here you wouldn't be so chicken. Something moved in the long grass on the other side of the river. For a second he thought he saw her, a blur of russet which might be her hair, something else which might be a stripy T-shirt or pullover. 'Rosa?' No response. She stared out at him from the long grass, her green eyes bright with curiosity. He could see her now he knew where to look. From a short distance away, he could hear the sound of a goat bleating. Rosa seemed to look at him with encouragement, almost with expectation. Beneath him he could hear the wasps |i;buzzing, a strangely yeasty sound, as if something below | Ijrthe earth were fermenting wildly. The sound, coupled with j I^Rosa's expectant look, was too much for him. He felt a burst t^of exhilaration, something which stripped the years away 1'^.and made him fourteen again, invulnerable. | 'Watch this,' he said, and began to move closer to the 1 nest. 1 Rosa watched him intently. He moved awkwardly, A inching towards the hole in the bank. He moved with his head down, as if this would fool the wasps into thinking him invisible. A couple of wasps settled momentarily on his back. She watched as he pulled his handkerchief out of his pocket. There was a lighter in one hand, the same lighter he had offered Rosa that day by the stream. Carefully, he opened the lighter and doused the handkerchief in the fluid. Holding the object at arm's length, he moved closer to the nest. There was a larger hole under the banking, a hole which might once have housed rats. Around it, a complex of mud honeycomb. A moment's hesitation, 227 choosing his spot, then he pushed the handkerchief right into the nest, leaving a tag-end of fabric dangling down like a fuse. As she watched, he looked at her and grinned. Banzai. He must have been drunk. That was the only explanation he could think of later, but it didn't feel like being drunk at the time. At the time it felt right. Good. Exciting. Amazing how quickly these things came back. He only had to flip the Bic once. The flame caught instantly, flaring with sudden, incredible fierceness. There must have been plenty of oxygen down the hole. Good. Briefly Jay wished he had brought some firecrackers. For a second or two there was no response from the wasps, then half a dozen came flying out like hot cinders. Jay felt a surge of euphoria and jumped to his feet, ready to run. That was the first mistake. Gilly always taught him to keep low, to find a hiding place from the start and to crouch low, under a root or behind a tree stump, as the enraged wasps came flying out. This time Jay was too busy watching Rosa. The wasps came out in a dreadful surge, and he ran for the bushes. Second mistake. Never run. The movement attracts them, excites them. The best thing is to lie flat on the ground, covering the face. But he panicked. He could smell burning lighter fluid and a vicious stink like burnt carpet. Something stung him on the arm and he slapped at it. Several wasps stung him then, maddeningly, through his T-shirt and on his hands and arms, zinging by his ears like bullets, darkening the air, and Jay lost what cool he had. He swore and slapped at his skin. Another wasp stung him just under the left eye, driving a brilliant lance of pain into his face, and he stepped out blindly, right over the edge of the cutaway and into the water. If the river had been shallower he might have broken his neck. As it was his fall saved him. He hit the water face-first, sank, screamed, swallowed river water, surfaced, sank again, made for the far banking and found himself a minute later several yards downriver, his T-shirt nubby with drowned wasps. 228 Under the nest, the fire he had lit was already out. Jay regurgitated river water. He coughed and swore shakily. Fourteen had never seemed so far away. From her distant island in time he thought he could hear Gilly laughing. The water was shallow on that side of the river, and he waded out onto the bank and flopped on all fours into the grass. His arms and hands were already swelling from the dozens of stings, and one eye was puffed shut like a boxer's. He felt like a week-old corpse. Gradually he became aware of Rosa watching from her vantage point upstream. She had wisely moved back to avoid the angry wasps, but he could see her, perched on the .top rung of the gatepost beside the dragon's head. She '[ looked curious but unconcerned. Beside her the goat |