When the guard came, Kati was instantly awake.
Her head ached and she felt as if she'd not slept at all, yet apparently she had, for she was on the cot, a light blanket over her. The guard came in with a tray of food and put it on the table when he saw she was awake. "Someone is coming for you," he said, then left the room and closed the door again.
She was ravenous. There was bread and cheese, a hot, grainy cereal with milk added to it, a small pot of tea. She wolfed it down greedily, drank all the tea, then relieved herself on the fancy toilet in the corner.
She waited on the cot only a few minutes before there was a soft knock on the door and it opened slightly. A small face peered around the edge of it. A woman. An old woman.
"Kati?"
She nodded, and the woman came in, and instantly there was a presence in Kati's mind. She is a Searcher, thought Kati, amazed.
You are surprised, I see. The woman was tiny, dressed in black. There was no bulge on her forehead, or prominent veins, yet the forehead was unusual, not flat but domed, extending to the temples.
It's possible for a woman to be a Searcher, Kati, but there have been few of us. I am Juimoshu. Some people would like to talk to you, and I will take you to them.
I have nothing to say to them.
The old woman walked forward, knelt before her, their eyes meeting. But you will. They are like us, Kati. You have much in common with them.
I am not a Searcher. I am Tumatsin, and I want to be with my people.
Juimoshu reached out to take Kati's hands and Kati balled them into fists in her lap. Juimoshu took them anyway, and her touch was warm, her eyes soft. Kati felt calmness, a sense of protection in those eyes.
You have a gift, Kati, and we want to find out about it. We want to know how you received it, for no other Tumatsin has received such a gift before. We think First Mother has blessed you.
"You mean the lady with the green eyes?" said Kati.
Juimoshu smiled, and squeezed Kati's hands. Her voice was husky, yet somehow melodic. "Yes, Kati, the lady who spoke to you from very far away. She is our ancestor and yours, too. She wants us to take care of you for Her. You've been in those clothes all night. Let's get you bathed, and then I'll find a nice robe for you to wear when we meet the people. Will you do that for me?"
She could detect no threat and nodded, even let the old woman take her hand to lead her out of the room and back to the barred gate. The short bow of the guard did not escape her, nor did the blankness of his mind. The woman leading her was someone he feared, a person with authority over him.
They climbed three flights of interior stairs to a hallway in white, and went in the first door there. The room was a marvel in porcelain, brightly lit. There was a row of fancy toilets, cubicles with transparent doors, and a huge, sunken tub, filled with steaming water. There was room for several people in that tub, and the water smelled like herbs. Juimoshu handed her a bar of soap, fragrant and smooth, not like the coarse soap of the Tumatsin, and said, "Bathe yourself, and I will wait outside."
Kati climbed into the tub, wearing only her pendants, and it was the most wonderful bath she'd ever had. The odors of herbs and flowers filled her, anxiety draining away with the heat. She rubbed the soap all over her body and into her hair, again and again, until finally Juimoshu called, "Hurry, now. Dry yourself with the towel by the tub and I will bring in your robe."
The towel was thick, and soft. Kati rubbed herself until her skin tingled, then held the towel in front of her as Juimoshu entered with a black robe and a pair of matching slippers.
How different you look. Lovely.
Kati put on the robe, felt Juimoshu's hands, then a brush, on her hair. The woman brushed her hair down slowly, gently, her tiny hands occasionally smoothing it. "We'll let it fall naturally, so it will dry faster," she murmured.
Kati felt relaxed, nearly sleepy from the heat of the bath, but it was not for long. Her anxiety grew as they climbed another flight of stairs to walk a long hallway surrounded by transparent material like clear ice with a view to the outside: clustered buildings to the right, to the left a panorama of the city sprawling below, down to the valley and the mountains beyond, and before them, a great, golden dome dazzling in the light of Tengri-Khan. They came out into another hallway in white, with closed, numbered doors on either side.
Kati's heart was pounding again. She felt a gentle squeeze on her hand. Juimoshu knocked softly on a door, opened it slightly. "I have Kati here," she said.
"Come, dear. These men are your friends."
They entered a room all in white except for a large, ebony table with matching chairs. The walls were barren of decorations, and light came from the ceiling. In one corner were a couch, a low, small ebony table before it, and two chairs. Two men had been sitting there and they stood as she entered. Both were Searchers, but now dressed in white, not their usual military garb. Older men, but not so old as Juimoshu, looking similar to each other, like brothers, one slightly larger. The smaller one she recognized as the man who had brought her back from the ordu.
Greetings, Kati. I am Mengyao, and the man beside me is Mengmoshu, my superior. Please sit here, and let us get to know you. Juimoshu will also join us.
Juimoshu led Kati to the couch, and sat down next to her, facing the men. Kati was enveloped by soft fabric, feeling small. She twisted her fingers together, and looked at Mengyao.
I know you from yesterday. Why am I here? My mother! You killed her! Kati's cheeks were suddenly flushed with anger.
The men stiffened, seeming startled.
Gently, child. We, the Moshuguang, tried to prevent that, but there was an error by the military people. Our Emperor sends his regrets to you for what happened, but we cannot undo it. We're sorry about your loss, and intend to devote ourselves to your care.
I WANT TO GO HOME! It was the other man who'd spoken to her, not Mengyao.
Both men blinked hard, and Kati felt Juimoshu flinch beside her.
"I think we will speak with words," said the man Mengmoshu. "It will be easier for all of us, and less painful."
"I want to go home," said Kati sorrowfully.
"I know. I know," said Mengmoshu, "but you are with us, now. You are with people like you."
"I'm not like you! The Searchers are evil! They go into people's minds, and steal their private thoughts. You are the Emperor's spies. Ma has told me this." Kati clenched her hands, and felt sudden hatred for these people who held her captive.
Kati felt Juimoshu's hand brush her cheek. "We are not evil, dear, but we do serve the Emperor in searching for lies people tell him. Tell me, Kati, did your mother know you could speak without words?"
"Yes, she knew, and it frightened her. She was always afraid for me after she found out."
She was careful of what she thought when I was near. Oh, you heard that!
Both men smiled.
"In time you will learn how to mask the things you wish hidden," said Mengmoshu. "Tell me, Kati, what am I thinking about?"
It was as clear as if he'd held up a painting for her to see: a waterfall splashing over smooth, moss-covered rocks into a little pool, and there were colorful fish swimming there. Kati told him what she saw, and he smiled, but his vision had triggered a torrent of memories that flashed through her in an instant: the waterfall at Festival, the Eye of Tengri, Ma on her horse, the sword in her hand.
All gone. All gone.
"I know the place of worship for the Tumatsin," said Mengmoshu, frowning. "I have been there, and felt the heat from what you call `The Eye.' Your memories will always be with you, Kati. At first they will be painful, but later you will see they relate to only a part of your life. Now you are moving on to something else. That woman was your mother?"
"Yes," said Kati, her voice cracking.
"You must always hold your mother dear in your heart, and honor her memory. She has made an exceptional child. How would you best remember her, Kati? Show me."
The quiet time, the moments before sleep, Ma leaning over her in dim light, stroking her cheek. Kati felt a tear run down her own cheek, and blinked, but the vision did not go away. She looked at Mengmoshu, and the vision was suddenly stronger. The vision was no longer only in her mind, but in his, and she was seeing it there.
"I miss her voice, her touch. She was my mother!" she sobbed, and the vision was gone. Mengmoshu scowled, shifted uneasily in his chair, and Mengyao glanced at him. His mind was now dark as a cave. Hiding something from her. Kati sobbed again, and felt Juimoshu's arm go around her shoulders. Mengmoshu seemed deep in thought, saying nothing. Mengyao glanced at him again, then at Juimoshu, raising an eyebrow.
"I will continue," said Juimoshu, "with a question for Kati." She hugged Kati gently, and spoke close to her ear.
"Have you ever seen the colors of people, dear, the kind of glow that surrounds them? I know that Tumatsin women can do this, and it's an ability we do not share with them."
Kati breathed deeply, calming herself, and wiped her face dry with one hand. Mengmoshu was still a darkness to her, his eyes focused at a point above her head without expression. Why had he suddenly become so quiet?
"I'm too young for that. Ma said I would see the life auras of people when I was ready to be a woman. She could do it, but I don't know what she saw. Ma could tell what people were feeling, though, and whether or not they were dangerous to us. She said it took practice."
"And how did she practice this?" asked Juimoshu.
Kati told them about her mother's shrine, her meditation with a flickering candle. Talking about Ma made her feel better. "I tried what Ma did, but it only put me to sleep," she said.
Even Mengmoshu smiled slightly. Kati's eyes hadn't moved from him. What are you hiding?
Mengyao suddenly leaned forward and said, "Kati, we'd like you to play a little candle game with us. It's important that you be relaxed when you play, and you might even learn something new about yourself. Would you like to try it?"
Kati shrugged her shoulders, but looked at him, away from the other man.
Mengyao got up, went to the big table, and returned with a stub of white candle, placing it on the table before her. He held out a metal tube, there was a click, and flame shot out of the tube, lighting the candle. He leaned over the table, looked closely at her, smiling.
"You see how steady the flame of the candle is because the air in this room isn't moving? See the tiny blue flame? So tiny. It's very hot there, and then there's yellow and orange. Watch the flame, Kati. Try to see the blue flame."
She saw only yellow and orange, but her eyes were now focused on the flame. Juimoshu's hand rubbed her shoulder gently, then rested warmly there.
"Watch the flame, Kati, and relax. Relax. Do you feel its heat?"
"No. It's too far away," Kati murmured.
"Then put out your hand, but not too close or too fast. We want the flame to be quiet. Sneak up to it, slowly."
Kati struggled briefly to escape the soft embrace of the couch, and sat on its edge, leaning forward so her fingers were a hand's length from the flame when Mengyao stopped her.
"Close enough. Now do you feel the heat?"
"No."
"Good. Now we will play the game, Kati. I want you to imagine that little points of light, like stars, are coming out of your fingertips. There are only a few at first, then many more, and the stars are making a bridge between your fingers and the flame, a little curved bridge that's reaching out to find the heat. Imagine it, Kati. See it in your mind, not your eyes. Reach for the flame without moving your hand."
Kati stared at the flame, relaxed again, and her eyes seemed to lose their focus. She still saw the flame, but her fingers were a blur. She tried to slowly shift focus to her fingers, but as she did so it seemed that a piece of the flame moved with her, a tiny, yellow tongue snaking out and fluttering there, seeking a direction. Come here, she thought, and the yellow tongue moved, growing longer. Suddenly there was an orange glow at the ends of her blurred fingers, and the yellow tongue moved with blinding speed, attaching itself there.
And Kati felt heat.
Surprised, she jerked her hand, and the yellow tongue snapped off, wavering wildly, but seeking her again, reattaching itself, and this time she held still. Warmth flowed into her fingers.
"Draw heat from the candle, Kati. Let it flow to your hand, and through your whole body, warming you all over. And look for the blue flame. Make it bigger. As you draw heat from the candle, the blue flame will grow."
And there was a blue flame now, a tiny thing the size of the candle's wick. Kati imagined heat flowing like liquid, issuing from the burning wax and pulling the blue flame with it. And it grew.
Her fingertips were now warm, and she could feel heat in her hand, moving slowly. But the blue flame grew rapidly, and with it the heat, and the heat was not moving fast enough beyond her fingers. Her fingertips were growing hotter and hotter, and she wanted to move her hand.
"It's hurting," she whispered. "It's burning me."
The candle flame wavered for an instant as her hand shook once, then again. Her arm was tired and her fingertips fiery hot. It was her imagination, the flame not touching her, and yet there was pain. She willed her hand to be still, but it wouldn't obey. She started to jerk it away—
And Mengyao grabbed her hand, putting her fingers briefly on his cheek, then pushing her hand back to her. "Place your fingertips on your lips, and see what you have done," he said quietly.
She did so, and her fingertips were hot! She placed them on her lips, her cheeks, and felt the heat drain into her. Very quickly, they were cool again. She looked up at Juimoshu, but the woman was looking at the men, smiling. Mengyao leaned back, grinning, but Mengmoshu had a stony look, his fingers steepled before his face.
"You have not imagined it, Kati," Mengyao said. "You feel the energy that came to you from the candle, crossing a space to reach your fingers. You did that, Kati. You did it with your mind."
"How?" she asked, rubbing her fingers together.
"Perhaps we'll discover that during your training," said Mengyao. "This will be your first exercise, Kati, to work with the candle each night before sleep. We do not want you hurt, so if it gets too hot, you should increase the distance between your fingers and the flame. We will work with you."
Finally, Mengmoshu spoke again. "All of us will work with you. Kati, you are a special child with great gifts from First Mother. We will discover those gifts, and develop them with you. First Mother has commanded this of us, and we obey Her will."
Kati felt sudden concern coming from this man, a keen interest in her welfare, yet he showed her no visions of thoughts he had. There was only a warm feeling that hadn't been there when she'd first met him only minutes ago. All three people seemed to genuinely care about her, yet they had taken her mother away in death, and brought her to this foreign place. She was suddenly confused.
"I think we've done enough for now," said Mengmoshu. "Juimoshu will take you to your quarters. You'll be living right here in the palace, Kati. Life will not be as harsh as it was in the mountains, and you will live like a child of nobility here."
"I cannot go outside?" Kati asked.
"Oh, yes. That will come, in time. A flower needs the light of Tengri-Khan. We will not let you wither."
Juimoshu put an arm around her. "There is a very nice lady who is anxious to meet you. I think you will like her, Kati, and she wants very much to take care of you. Her baby died, you see, and she is quite lonely. She has lost someone just like you have. Shall we go now?"
Everything was happening so fast. Kati nodded her head numbly, for it seemed all was decided for her. She stood up with Juimoshu, who again took her by the hand. They walked towards the door, and then Mengmoshu called out, "Wait a moment."
The man knelt before her, close, and looked straight into her eyes.
The three of us will be your teachers, but only in matters of the mind. There will be other teachers as well. We are all your friends, Kati, and in time you will have many friends here. Although we keep you here, do not think of yourself as a captive. The day will come when you will determine your own course of life. In the meantime, we will teach you, and if there is something you wish for, you only need to ask for it.
But I wish to go HOME! I want to be with Da and Baber!
I understand. In time, I will help you find them again. And when you're a woman, if you wish to live with the Tumatsin, it will be so. In the end, we are all one people. Remember that. All one people. But you are in the hands of First Mother now, and your destiny will be decided by Her. We are only servants, Kati. Believe in First Mother, who has spoken to you. Listen to Her carefully when she speaks to you again.
I will. Then I will ask her why my mother is dead. Kati met his gaze solidly and he blinked, but then he reached up and touched her cheek.
You can talk to me anytime you wish, child.
He stood up, made a motion with his hand, and Juimoshu led her away.
The feeling of great warmth had been there again. Suddenly, the man had affection for her, but why? He was the leader of the trio; she had sensed the other two pausing for his questions, deferring to him. That vision of Ma, in his head, not hers, something about it had changed his feelings, had made a connection between them. Again, she was confused.
Juimoshu led her to two brass doors at the end of the hallway and pressed something on the wall. A trooper was standing there, fully armed and armored, his gaze fixed straight ahead. The doors slid open, revealing a cubicle in brass and they stepped inside, the doors closing them in. Juimoshu took a piece of metal, poked it in one of several slots by the door and turned it with a click. Kati's stomach suddenly seemed to rise, and she gasped, involuntarily squeezing Juimoshu's hand. Just as quickly, her stomach settled again and the doors opened.
Two guards faced them, rifles across their chests, faces tense and alert. They nodded, Juimoshu pausing briefly before they stepped out into a hallway curving left and right along the arc of a great circle. The walls were painted in gold, the carpet thick, and red. They turned left, walking past painted portraits of men and women in regal dress, tapestries showing gardens and mountain scenes and villages that were surely not Tumatsin. There were no gerts, but white huts clustered around central squares with pools in their centers and fields of grain stretching to the far distance.
It seemed they walked far before coming to a huge door out of black wood, and Juimoshu knocked softly on it. The door was opened by a young woman wearing a yellow robe, hair rolled into buns on both sides of her face. Kati thought she was pretty. Was this the woman?
"We are expected," said Juimoshu.
"I know," said the woman. "She was too excited to sleep after you came back again last night. And this must be Kati." The woman gave Kati a beautiful smile, and beckoned for them to enter.
"This is Tanchun," said Juimoshu, "First-Servant of Lady Weimeng, with whom you'll be staying."
Tanchun bowed low, hands folded, a gesture that surprised Kati and made her feel uncomfortable. So she nodded her head, and managed a faint smile.
"This way," said Tanchun, and she walked gracefully ahead of them, as if floating.
The place was not one room, but many, and Kati had never dreamed of such beauty and luxury existing. The first room had a floor of black polished stone, a low table in its center surrounded by cushions, couches and chairs along three walls beneath mirrors with gilded frames. They walked left under an arch to a second room, walls painted yellow, three women sitting behind desks, working at machines with illuminated screens. They were filled with a script Kati had seen on wall hangings in her own ger, but could not yet read, for education of a Tumatsin girl began in her seventh year. Everywhere they walked, the floors were black stone.
There was a third room like the first, then one with a closed door, then another set of double doors, high and black. Tanchun went to those doors, and knocked three times.
"Enter!" said someone, quite loudly. Kati was feeling an excitement, and it was not her own, though she was nervous.
Tanchun opened the door. "They are here, Madam."
"Please bring them in!" said a woman.
Kati squeezed Juimoshu's hand hard, and gasped at the sight of the opulence before her: the red carpet, the colors of the wall hangings, the huge, golden, canopied bed on one side of a huge room with high ceiling. A woman stood up from behind a black table in the center of the room. Tall and slender, she wore a yellow robe that showed the curves in her body. She was not young, or old. Certainly older than Ma. Her hair showed no grey, and was in side buns like the style of her servant, but her face was not so round as Tanchun's. She had a beautiful smile, and stretched out her arms as she walked towards them.
"You have finally brought her, mother. It seems I've been waiting forever." She put her arms around Juimoshu, and hugged her fiercely.
Mother? This is your daughter?
Yes. She is a good woman, Kati, and she has lost a child. She wants to take care of you, and I want it, too. I want it for both of you.
The woman knelt before Kati, and grasped her hands.
"This is Kati," said Juimoshu.
"I am Weimeng," said the woman, her eyes moist and sparkling. Emotions poured from this woman: joy, love, sorrow, elation, a jumble of feelings that were overwhelming yet somehow comforting, so much so that Kati felt herself smiling.
"Oh, mother, she's beautiful! Has The Son of Heaven been consulted about this? Does he know?"
"I have spoken to him early this morning and he has given his approval," said Juimoshu.
"Then it's not a dream, and she is really here. My little girl is really here."
The joy of the woman was coming in waves, but there was something else. Something about a dead child—
"She is called Kati, daughter. That is her name," said Juimoshu.
"I know. I know. Kati, they say I can take care of you while you're here, and it's something I want badly. Would you stay with me, live with me here? I have a room just for you, a place for your privacy when you want it. I know you can be very happy here. Will you stay?"
What could she say? Everything seemed planned and decided for her. "If you wish it," she said.
"Oh, I do! I do! Weimeng embraced her tightly, Kati's arms at her sides, stiff at first, then relaxing. The woman's cheek was smooth against hers, and wet with tears. There was a sweet fragrance in her hair.
Weimeng released her and wiped the tears from her own cheek. "Come now. I will show you your room." She took Kati's hand, and they went to the closed door, Juimoshu following silently behind.
They went to the door near the entrance to Weimeng's suite, "This is your place," said Weimeng, and opened the door dramatically.
It was not one room, but three, and Kati was stunned by the sight. A room with plush, golden carpet, couch, three chairs and table, walls red, light from globes hanging from a brass chandelier, two mirrors with gilded frames making it seem even larger than it was. The mirrors were colorless, unlike the ones of polished brass she was used to. Through an arch there was a bedroom with drawers in plain walls, a porcelain receptacle and shelf with running water before a large mirror opposite a canopied bed shrouded in fine, gold net. Adjacent to it was a room in porcelain, with black stone flooring, glassed-in cubicle, with a fancy toilet and a huge, sunken tub. Colorful bottles sat on a shelf surrounding the tub, and the air was filled with sweet odors of herbs and other things she didn't recognize.
Kati looked at it all in a daze as Weimeng led her back excitedly to the first room. "Now, I will show you the best thing," she said, smiling.
In each room, one wall was curved outward, like the surface of a sphere. Weimeng pressed a button of metal on one wall, there was a buzzing sound and the light of Tengri-Khan flooded the room. The wall opened up like a mouth, and there was a clear panel there, like a piece of the city's tent. She looked outside, and saw the entire city sprawling below her, the tent still high above her position. She could see the valley and the great cliffs and the mountains far beyond. She could see the three peaks that were one.
"I have kept these rooms for guests, and you are the first to use them. Now these rooms are yours."
But Kati, clutching at the window sill, was lost in the sight of the mountains.
"Tanchun!" called Weimeng. "Have the fitters arrived?"
"Yes, Madam. Two are here, waiting," came a distant voice.
Tanchun arrived, Kati's leathers stacked neatly in her hands. "These have been washed, Madam," she said, and put the leathers in a drawer, opened a sliding panel on one wall as they followed her into the bedroom. Two women appeared at the archway, carrying heavy books and a metal case. They bowed deeply, and waited.
Juimoshu touched Kati's shoulder and the girl looked up at her. "Now is the time for me to leave," Juimoshu said gently. "We will give you some days to get used to your new surroundings, but then there is work for you to do. One of us will come for you. In the meantime, remember to practice each night with this, as we instructed." She gave Kati a small, fat candle, and the metal fire-tube, and showed her how to use the tube.
Then she left.
Weimeng was issuing a stream of orders to Tanchun and the other women, and everyone was hurrying. They took off Kati's robe, and the women measured every part of her body, writing things down, and then they showed her a thousand pictures of robes and suits, gowns and shoes, all manner of colorful clothing in the thick books they'd brought. Weimeng sat on the floor with Kati, arm around her, and pointed to the pictures.
"Do you like that?"
"It's pretty," said Kati.
Weimeng tapped the picture, and the women wrote something down.
Over and over again. So many clothes, all beautiful. The process seemed to go on forever, and when the women finally left they bowed deeply, broad smiles on their faces, seeming quite pleased with themselves. It suddenly occurred to Kati that everything she had liked in those pictures would soon be hers.
Tanchun served them lunch back in Weimeng's suite. There was bread and cheese, strips of meat mixed with vegetables and ropy starch that filled Kati to bursting. And they talked as they ate, about everything, including the sad things, but for the moment, at least, it was hard for Kati to be sad. The joy and feelings of love coming from Weimeng seemed to drown it all out.
But there was a point, when Kati talked about Ma, that she began to cry. She was surprised when Weimeng cried with her, tears flowing freely. The woman reached across the table, held Kati's hands in hers and said, "You cry for your mother, I cry for another, but now we have found each other, and neither of us need ever be lonely again."
And Kati knew it was true. Ma and Sushua were gone forever, but she was still alive, and Da and Baber were still out there, perhaps searching for her even now. Hadn't Mengmoshu said he would help her find them someday? Her presence was bringing joy to Weimeng, and that was a good thing. And there were things to learn about this place, things to learn about herself.
She remembered the emerald eyes of Mandughai, the voice in her head, saying, `There are things I would have you do when you're a woman.' Had Mandughai brought her to this place? Was there a purpose in all that had happened to her?
That night she was exhausted, and Weimeng had allowed her some private time before she would come to prepare her for sleep. Kati got out her candle, lit it, and stared at the steady flame for sometime, but it did not make her drowsy. She put out her hand and imagined the bridge of light. The yellow tongue of flame was instantly there. She felt its heat, but kept it constant by slowly drawing back her hand to an arm's length. The blue flame grew until the candle was hissing, dissolving before her eyes, and then she jerked her hand away. The candle had burned down to a stub in minutes.
The exercise was easy, and perhaps they would be able to find something more interesting for her to do.
Weimeng came to tuck her into bed, and Kati felt as if she were floating on a cloud. The woman's hand stroked her forehead as her eyes closed, and as she drifted off she heard a whisper close to her ear.
"Sleep well, my baby. My darling Mengnu. Mother is here."
Mengmoshu spent the entire afternoon and evening correlating all reported Tumatsin births over the past seven years. It was late when he found what he was looking for: a daughter Kati, born to Temujin and Toregene in the unnamed ordu near the three peaks, the ordu that had served as a Tumatsin reconnaissance outpost for several years. Born in the season of last frost—seven years ago. His apprehension grew as he searched further.
He found that Toregene shared the lineage of Manlee, the woman whose eyes could be green when she desired it, the woman who led the spiritual life of the Tumatsin.
Toregene. Her smiling face above a loved child. Her twisted face beneath a man who forced his seed into her.
And now a child, only seven, with the powers of a mature Searcher, and something far beyond that. A child now placed in his care.
He could not eat, and went to bed early.
He prayed for hours, perspiration pouring from him.
Finally, the matrix of light appeared, the pattern of sparkling stars that signified Her presence. And then the emerald eyes, without a face, opening up to gaze at him.
I feel your agony, Mengmoshu. Let it flow from you, for there is much to do.
First Mother, in my zeal to do your work, I violated your principles. I forced a woman, and now there is a child from it.
I do not condone your method, Mengmoshu, but you saved the woman's life and the child is something entirely new. She gives us hope for moving to the next step.
Then I am the father?
Of course. There can be no doubt of that. She is the child of your body, but she must not know this now. You must keep it from her, and that will be difficult. She already sees deeply, and I will begin work with her soon. I feel her even now. She is exciting, Mengmoshu. You have served me well.
I feel remorse, and guilt about her mother.
Then feel it, and let it pass. Love your child, and teach her all you can. I will do the rest. You are her father, Mengmoshu. Now you must act the part.
The eyes closed, the stars flickering, and then there was darkness again. Mengmoshu lay still for a moment, his mind raging. He willed calm, bringing himself to a state near sleep, then reached out to a place nearby.
Kati, are you there? Can you hear me?
There were no thoughts, only a vision of the mountains as seen from a window in the palace dome.
And there were no sorrowful cries that night.