“Sounds like a riot,” I said. Gilbey and I, in the Weider coach, were nearing Playmate’s stable.
Possibly it was a neighborhood war. A lot of sturdy subject types, armed with knives and cudgels, were trying to adjust the larcenous attitudes of the biggest daytime mob of ratmen I’d ever seen. There were dozens of them. And things weren’t going their way. The street was littered with ratmen already down. The survivors were trying to retreat, burdened with booty. And just as Manvil and I arrived the Domains of Chaos spewed another ingredient into the cauldron.
At least twenty more ratmen appeared. They attacked the smash-and-grab guys with a ferocity I hadn’t seen since the islands. They were determined to leave bodies behind. And they got as good as they gave.
I leaned out the coach door and told our driver, “Just stay real still and try to think invisible thoughts till this blows over.”
“What’s happening?” Gilbey asked. There was no color left in his face. He didn’t get out on the town much.
“We seem to have strayed into the middle of a factional skirmish amongst members of the ratman underworld. What it was before it turned into that I won’t know until I get a chance to look around.” But I had a feeling it boded no good for me and my industrial schemes.
“Your life is never dull, is it?”
“A little dull wouldn’t hurt, some days. I’ve thought about calling my autobiography Trouble Follows Me. The problem with that is, the troubles in my life are usually waiting when I get there.”
The battle outside turned tricornered. Playmate’s sturdy subject type neighbors couldn’t tell one ratman from another. And most of them just plain welcomed a chance to whack on a thieving ratman anyway.
Whistles sounded in the distance. The Guards were gathering. I expected that, like the Watch before them, they would move in only after they were confident that they had nobody to deal with but people who couldn’t crawl away.
I slipped down out of the coach. “Better stay in here for now, Manvil.”
“No problem. I used up my adventurous side a long time ago.”
One thing that’s never in short supply around Playmate’s stable is the rough hemp twine his hay-and-straw man uses to bundle his products before he brings them into town. Playmate saves the twine and gives it back.
I gathered a load and started tying rats. Neighbors thought that was a marvelous idea and joined right in.
“Not that one,” I told one of the sturdy subjects. “The ones wearing the green armbands are the good guys. Sort of. We can fail to see them getting away if they’re able to go.”
That earned me some dark looks but no real arguments. Emotions were surprisingly cool, considering.
I tied fourteen ratmen personally before the Guard arrived. There were more still unbound. Almost all of the neighbors had started to carry Playmate’s possessions back into the stable. They ignored instructions not to disturb the evidence. Most of that, I noted, was stuff that had been looted from Kip’s workshop.
I returned to the Weider coach. “Come on. Let’s see if they left anything I can show you.”
To my delight, the three-wheel, my three-wheel, hadn’t been disturbed. “This’s the main thing I want to make. The biggest thing. Right here. Watch this.” I climbed aboard, zoomed around as best I could in the confined space. “I can see every rich family in town wanting one of these for a toy. Come on. Try it.”
As Gilbey was trying to get the hang of making the big front wheel turn in the correct direction I caught a sound from behind me and whirled, expecting an attack from some desperado ratman who’d been knocked down earlier or who’d gone into hiding when the tide had turned. What I found was a weak, cross-eyed Playmate trying to get up from where he’d been laid low by a blow to the head.
I gave him a hand up, which wasn’t the best thing to do for him in his condition. I supported him till he could get his backside planted on a bale of hay and his spine pressed against a post. “How bad does it look, Garrett?” I was checking the top of his head.
“You’re going to need a real surgeon. You’ve got a piece of scalp peeled back. The wound needs cleaning. You need a bunch of stitches. You’re going to be enjoying headaches for days. What did they want?”
“They never told me but they meant to haul off everything Kip ever made.”
“Didn’t I warn you?’
“Yes. You did. How’s Winger?”
“I don’t know. I haven’t seen her. She supposed to be here? I’ll look around. Manvil, would you keep an eye on my friend, here? You remember how to deal with a head injury? Don’t let him go to sleep.”
I found no sign of Winger anywhere. I went back to Playmate. “You sure Winger was still here?”
“I still have fresh blisters on my ears from the language she used when this started, Garrett. She was busting up ratmen like she was killing snakes or something. They won’t be good to her if they took her away.”
“You Garrett?”
I jumped. I hadn’t heard this guy come in. He was way shorter than me but plenty wide and all muscle. He had big, brushy eyebrows that met in the middle over mean-looking little blue eyes that, surely, concealed a bright mind. He was clad in businesslike apparel that managed to look shoddy even though it was relatively new. I knew what he was before I asked, “Who wants to know?”
“I do. Lucius Browling. Extraordinary Guard Services. Reporting straight to the director.” Lucius Browling didn’t offer to shake. Neither was he rude or confrontational.
“The director? What director?”
“Director Relway. Of the Emergency Committee for Royal Security.”
Good old Relway. Count on him to paint the outside of his house of righteous thugs with colorful, high-sounding monikers. Monikers that would change as fast as people figured out that each was a hollow mask for something more sinister, probably.
“In that case, Garrett just left. If you hurry you can catch him. He’s a little weasely-faced guy with a skinny black mustache . . . You know, all of you guys would get along with the world a lot better if you could just figure out what it means to have a sense of humor.”
“Quite possibly you have a point. The director occasionally mentions how much he values your opinion. Perhaps you can raise the matter personally once we get to the al-Khar.” He raised a hand to forestall my next question. “Colonel Block and the director both want to consult you concerning recent events. I’m just a messenger. Just one of a dozen EGS men in the field, hoping to run into you at one of your known haunts.”
Implications, implications. They knew I wasn’t at home . . .
There was no point fighting it. “I’ll be with you in a minute, then. Let me wrap up here.” I stepped over to Gilbey. Manvil had been smart enough to get off the three-wheel before any outsider could get a good idea of what he was doing. Right now he was just a civilian who happened to be hanging around. “Tell Max. Let me know what you guys think.” I turned. “Playmate. I want you to go see Drak Shevesh about your head. I’ve used him. He’s the best there is. And it won’t bother him that you’re human.”
I told Lucius Browling I was ready. He didn’t cheer. He didn’t say much, either. Which was just as well. I was a little preoccupied trying to spot the Goddamn Parrot and being worried about Winger.
I did tell Browling, “If your people have any real interest in what happened here you should round up a bounty hunter named Bic Gonlit. He had something to do with it somehow.”
I was getting piqued with Bic. He was as stubborn about sticking to his job as I could be.