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<DATE>2011-09-02</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>Judith Siefring</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
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<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch Z110810.apex.</ITEM>
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<STC T="W">V111A</STC>
<BIBNO T="oclc">52529060</BIBNO>
<VID>179191</VID>
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<TEXT LANG="eng">
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="text">
<PB N="1" REF="1">
<HEAD><HI>Variety of NEWS for all Pallats, As Certainties, Probabilities,</HI> &amp;c.</HEAD>
<P>TO the fir&s;t, There is nothing of greater truth then the ble&s;|&s;ings that accompanies His <HI>Maje&s;ties</HI> happy Government, have already made His Subjects in <HI>Great Britain,</HI> forget their by-pa&s;t mi&s;eries: And what a harmony is twixt His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> and Parliament of <HI>England,</HI> you may perceive by this en|&s;uing extract from the Engli&s;h Intelligencer.</P>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<HEAD>We&s;tmin&s;ter.</HEAD>
<P>His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> was graciou&s;ly plea&s;ed to &s;end a Letter, dated the 22. in&s;tant to Sir <HI>Edward Turner,</HI> Speaker of the Hou&s;e of Com|mons, to be communicated to the Hou&s;e; wherein His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> having acquainted them of the great de&s;igne, He formerly told them He had to make His Progre&s;s this Summer, to vi&s;it <HI>Worce&s;ter</HI> and other places to pay God thanks for His miraculous deliverances, doth withall mind them of &s;ome Bills which He had told them were prepared for them for confirmation of what was enacted at their la&s;t meeting, more particularly the high value His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> had of the Act of Indempnity, for the di&s;patch of which, His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> a&s;&s;u|red them that could He have u&s;ed &s;tronger expre&s;&s;ions for the &s;pee|dy di&s;patch of it, He would have done it, and that He thought what He &s;aid, would have made an impre&s;&s;ion in all who profe&s;&s;e a de&s;ire to &s;erve H<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter">m, and that He expected every day it would be pre&s;ented for another A&s;&s;ent; His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> farther acquaints them, that He hath heard they have already prepared &s;ome good Bills (for which He heartily thanks them) ready for the Royal A&s;&s;ent, yet that He hath not a mind to pa&s;s them, till the Act of Indempnity be likewi&s;e pre|&s;ented: upon which, His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> &s;aith (if they take His word) mo&s;t of His quiet and good depends, and in which He is &s;ure His honour is concern'd. His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> therefore again conjures them, with all earne&s;tne&s;s po&s;&s;ible, to pa&s;s the Act in the &s;ame termes He hath al|ready
<PB N="2" REF="2"> pa&s;s'd it (to which His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> takes Him&s;elf obliged) and that they will at pre&s;ent lay a&s;ide all private bu&s;ine&s;s to betake them&s;elves to the Publick, that they may be ready to adjourn by the middle of the next moneth.</P>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<HEAD>Whitehall.</HEAD>
<P>His <HI>Maje&s;ty</HI> taking &s;peciall notice of the prudent managery of affairs by <HI>Don Franci&s;co de Mello, Comte de Ponte,</HI> Amba&s;&s;ador extraordinary from the King of <HI>Portugall,</HI> how by his con&s;tant care and faithfull applications he hath not onely &s;atisfied the de&s;ires of his own Ma&s;ter the King of <HI>Portugall,</HI> who, out of a long and natu|rall affection to the Engli&s;h, alwayes wi&s;ht for a nearer alliance with this Crown, but withall afforded &s;uch va&s;t advantages to the people of <HI>England,</HI> as could not be expected from any one Nation, be&s;ides that incomparable ble&s;&s;ing which the&s;e Kingdoms will enjoy, in that mo&s;t excellent Prince&s;&s;e, <HI>Donna Katharina,</HI> the Infanta of <HI>Portugall,</HI> that &s;uch faithfull and eminent &s;ervices for the mutuall benefit of his own and the&s;e Kingdomes, might not be pa&s;s'd by without &s;ome &s;ignal mark of His <HI>Maje&s;ties</HI> favour, was graciou&s;ly plea&s;ed Him&s;elf to give an invitation to the Amba&s;&s;ador to dine with His Royal Per&s;on at <HI>Whitehall</HI> on Thur&s;day the 27. in&s;tant. And that this Royall invitation might (ar farre as could) be an&s;wered with a fitting &s;olemnity on that day, the Right Honourable the Earle of <HI>Bedford,</HI> together with Sir <HI>Charles Cotterell</HI> Ma&s;ter of the Ceremonies to his <HI>Maje&s;ty,</HI> went with his <HI>Maje&s;ty's</HI> and his Royall Highne&s;s the Duke of <HI>York's</HI> Coaches, with &s;everal other Coaches belonging to the chiefe&s;t of the Nobility to the Amba&s;&s;adors hou&s;e, and thence conducted him with his whole Retinue to <HI>Whitehall:</HI> where being come, after the hearty &s;alutes of the whole Court, the Amba&s;&s;ador was placed at the &s;ame Table with His <HI>Maje&s;ty.</HI> While&s;t this high honour was given to the Amba&s;&s;ador, tho&s;e wor|thy Gentlemen of his Retinue were with all re&s;pect provided for, being treated at the Tables of <HI>James</HI> Duke of <HI>Ormond</HI> Lord Ste|ward, and <HI>Edward</HI> Earl of <HI>Manche&s;ter</HI> Lord Chamberlain of His <HI>Maje&s;tie's</HI> Hou&s;hold.</P>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<HEAD><HI>London, July,</HI> 2. 1661.</HEAD>
<P>Ye&s;terday the Hou&s;e of Commons heard witne&s;&s;e as to &s;uch of the late Kings Tryers who are dead, and voted that their E&s;tates &s;hould be forefeited to His <HI>Majesty.</HI> The Lord <HI>Moun&s;on,</HI> Sir <HI>Henry Mild|may,</HI>
<PB N="3" REF="2"> and Mr. <HI>Robert Wallop,</HI> were al&s;o brought before the Hou&s;e of Commons upon their knees: the fir&s;t confe&s;<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter">ed his fault with much regrate, and pleaded that he was drawn into &s;uch an horrid Act, for which he was very &s;orry, and acknowledged his &s;itting in the pre|tended High Court of Ju&s;tice. Sir <HI>Henry Mildmay</HI> was &s;orry for his mi&s;guiding: but &s;aid that he fell out with <HI>Cromwell</HI> about the pro&s;ecution again&s;t His late <HI>Maje&s;ty,</HI> that &s;ome Members of the Hou&s;e being going to Dinner, he was drawn to go into <HI>We&s;tmin&s;ter-Hall,</HI> and was a Spectator, but did not vote in the Court, though his being pre&s;ent, was proved. Mr. <HI>Wallop</HI> craved pardon of the the Hou&s;e, was &s;orry that he &s;hould be named in &s;uch a vile Com|mi&s;&s;ion, but was an old frail man, and did not remember that he &s;at in the pretended High Court: (it was al&s;o proved he was al&s;o pre|&s;ent, <HI>June</HI> 23. 1648.) Sir <HI>James Harrington</HI> appeared not, but it was proved that he &s;at in the High Court of Ju&s;tice upon the whole. The Hou&s;e of Commons re&s;olved, that the E&s;tates Reall and Per|&s;onall of the &s;aid four Per&s;ons, &s;hould be forefeited to His <HI>Ma|je&s;ty;</HI> that they &s;hould be drawn from the Tower to <HI>Tyburne</HI> upon Hurdles with Ropes about their necks, and thence to &s;everall Pri&s;ons to remain during life.</P>
<P>Since my la&s;t, we under&s;tand from <HI>Dunkirk,</HI> that the Countrey have paid in their contributions to that Garri&s;on, notwith&s;tanding the orders that were alledged to be given again&s;t it.</P>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<HEAD>Probabilities.</HEAD>
<P>It is twenty to one but the 75000. Florens, which the Religious Hollanders have advanced for reparation of the walls of <HI>Geneva</HI> (chance to mi&s;carry) if it be intru&s;ted to &s;uch Elders hands as were the contributions of the Prote&s;tants of <HI>Lucerna.</HI></P>
<P>It is probable, that the Pope may drink his <HI>Albano</HI> in &s;ecurity, &s;ince the League and Covenant, which our <HI>Levites</HI> told us &s;hould have brought the Vatican about his ears, made &s;o &s;olemn a halt over all <HI>England</HI> on the 29. of <HI>May</HI> la&s;t; and its mother, the National Co|venant, had the honour to be burnt at <HI>Mu&s;leburgh</HI> much about the &s;ame time, in the bo&s;ome of <HI>Be&s;&s;y Fouler,</HI> that renouned Fi&s;h|witch.</P>
<P>It is probable if <HI>Caledonius</HI> had writ in <HI>Anno</HI> 1649. the cuff of his Neck might have pa&s;&s;ed for Bran and his Buttocks for Bacon;
<PB N="4" REF="3"> for his head would been as tooth&s;ome to &s;ome, as the foreskin of a <HI>Phili&s;tin</HI> was to <HI>Saul.</HI></P>
<P>If it be true that is reported of an I&s;land, newly di&s;covered, fifty Leagues to the we&s;t of <HI>Ireland,</HI> and that the Inhabitants be of &s;o large a bulk as ten yards in length, and three of breadth; It &s;eems not to be that &s;o much mentioned enchanted I&s;land, &s;ometimes &s;een on the we&s;t I&s;les of <HI>Scotland,</HI> named in the Mapp, O <HI>Brazil,</HI> and by our Philo&s;ophers in the <HI>Hebrides, Rockcolle:</HI> But much more probable that it mu&s;t be &s;ome of the Benigne Planets, who wea|ried with the lyes and reproaches put upon it by the A&s;trologers of this World; and to confound their ob&s;ervations, the di&s;creet Pla|net hath joyned her &s;elf to that part of the Globe which is under the Protection of our Dread Soveraign. They report the Inhabi|tants are very wi&s;e and moral, and a knowledge much exceeding that of our <HI>Di&s;tingui&s;hers;</HI> and this is the rea&s;on why &s;ome thinks it rather a Colony, &s;ent from the Moon to in&s;truct our World of the true natural cau&s;es of all tho&s;e my&s;teries which rai&s;es &s;uch heat and contention among&s;t the Pedants in our Schools, &s;o it is hoped if we had once communication with them, the common an&s;wer of <HI>Oculia qualitas,</HI> &s;o much u&s;ed by our Philo&s;ophers in matters they do not under&s;tand, &s;hall be quite bani&s;hed.</P>
<P>If any one now in the Dogg dayes eat immoderately of the black tailed Pouts that are catched in the <HI>Cannongate,</HI> it is probable he may purcha&s;e a pair of everla&s;ting Breeches though po&s;&s;ibly the Fancies of them chance to prove expen&s;ive.</P>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<HEAD>A LETTER from the Prince of <HI>Tartar</HI>'s Secretary, to the City Recorder of <HI>Cockany.</HI></HEAD>
<OPENER><SALUTE>SIR,</SALUTE></OPENER>
<P>I <HI>Shall not at this time be &s;o large, as to give an account of all the adventures his Highne&s;s met with in traver&s;ing the Countrey, re&s;erving that for a large de&s;cription of it &s;elf: But I &s;hall tell you of an accident that had almo&s;t &s;plit my weak Noddle, if I had not been &s;trongly fortified with read Ale, Unions and Aquavitie, which I drunk at the</HI> Mure <HI>Ale-hou&s;e, with a reduced Major of</HI> Pryds <HI>Regiment, who is very well &s;a|tisfied to be Tap&s;ter of the place.</HI></P>
<PB N="5" REF="3">
<P><HI>It was, Sir, at</HI> Mid&s;ummers Eve, <HI>a night when the King of</HI> Fairy <HI>and Prince of the Aire, are accu&s;tomed to parad towards the skirts of</HI> Glentannarwood, <HI>a &s;ort of &s;piritual</HI> Groteske <HI>in a brown Suit and black Buttons, flat Shoes, a tipt</HI> Virginia <HI>skulcap, with an Antipi&s;copall Hat, and above 7000. Ladies and Women of all &s;tations and &s;izes; nay, even to the cour&s;er &s;ort of Chamber-maids and Spin&s;ters: As al&s;o, a con&s;iderable num|ber of Trad&s;-men and Shop-keepers; all with melancholy a&s;pects, in a &s;tragling di&s;orderly way they marched after him. By his retinue I judged him a Tinker, but he told me no, and that he was a Schoolma&s;ter of a Countrey Hamlet in</HI> Fife, <HI>his name was ingraven upon a Po&s;&s;et-cap in a great</HI> Golgatha; <HI>I asked if he intended for</HI> London <HI>or</HI> Edinburgh, <HI>to inherit the Benefi|ces of Par&s;on</HI> Pe<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter">ers <HI>and Mr.</HI> James Guthery, <HI>he an&s;wered no, his bu&s;ine&s;s was for</HI> America, <HI>to whom he was to addre&s;s him&s;elf to the King of</HI> Bantam, <HI>who is a</HI> Cadet <HI>of the Aethio|pian</HI> John, <HI>to whom he was to di&s;cover greater &s;ecrets of Po|licy&punc; then ever have been heretofore done by</HI> Plato, Matchiavell, <HI>or</HI> Bodin; <HI>for in re&s;pect of him they were but Pedees, for the matter of conquering and &s;ubduing of Nations: The pretext of R<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter">ligon &s;ayes he, is of &s;o Tiffany invention, that the people through it do &s;oon di&s;cover the barene&s;s of the Breech, that Armes again were too la&s;ting, and after once fitted, they were loath to part with them; but the cheape&s;t and &s;ecure&s;t way he affirmed, was by the mighty power of a</HI> Rogero infuriato &amp; implacabile, <HI>which he undert<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter">ok to prove both by Hi&s;tory and Tradition, was not</HI> Jupiter, <HI>&s;aid he, the &s;on of</HI> Saturne <HI>and King of</HI> Latium, <HI>not only a grand Conqueror, but reverenced for a god; and yet never no noi&s;e of his Warrs for topting the third part of the World, as Floods, Mountains, and Bea&s;ts, and that was</HI> Europa. <HI>How do you think that I being a Bumpkin Pe|dant came by all this trayn,</HI> Mafoy Mon&s;ieur a force de bien labourer, &amp;c. <HI>There's not one of the&s;e poor wretches you &s;ee
<PB N="6" REF="4"> here, but Ile undertake before I want the lea&s;t &s;atisfaction of my &s;en&s;es, but they will pawn the be&s;t of their moveables, nay even to their</HI> Crumbs of comfort, <HI>or Wedding &s;mocks; and the only rea&s;on as I told you,</HI> Je me fou d'eux &amp; de toute leur famile.</P>
<P><HI>This horrid Policy did highly a&s;toni&s;h me, yet when I con&s;i|dered the influence &s;uch Hypocritical impo&s;tures hath had up|on the weaker under&s;tandings, I thought it not &s;o &s;trange. I then demanded him which way he intended to tran&s;port his Tribe, he replyed &s;o &s;oon as I once get to the we&s;t Coa&s;t of</HI> Whigmeria, <HI>I &s;hall meet with &s;ouls &s;o precious and of &s;o great faith, as in two dayes time &s;hall waft us to our journeys end: I wi&s;hed him a good voyage, and told him, if he would obliedge this Countrey that he &s;hould leave none of his brethren behind; but in &s;tead of a reply, I found he and all was evani&s;hed, which made me con|clude, that this mu&s;t have been the Gho&s;t of &s;ome grand Seducer and his company, the &s;ouls of &s;uch that dyed in his belief. You may communicat this to &s;uch as can make the be&s;t u&s;e of it. In the mean time I am</HI></P>
<CLOSER><SIGNED>Your humble Servant, John Dow, Mackermoch.</SIGNED>
<POSTSCRIPT>
<HEAD>Po&s;t&s;cript.</HEAD>
<P><HI>Our Prince re&s;olves to &s;ojurne at</HI> Kincairn Oneil, <HI>partly to &s;ee the Solemnities at</HI> Bartel <HI>Fair, partly to recover a weakne&s;s in his back, occa&s;ioned by the Bailies Daughter of</HI> Bervy, <HI>as &s;he was &s;ucking out a Corne in his great toe: the la&s;t Letters he had from his royal Father &s;ignified as much, that he had taxed his Empire for</HI> 20000. Crat&s;zoniskys, <HI>which in our money comes to five Merks, for the charges of his return: In the mean time he hath Bills of credit from</HI> Buckhaven <HI>to all the North|coa&s;t to furni&s;h him with all &s;ort of Fi&s;h.</HI></P>
</POSTSCRIPT></CLOSER>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="part">
<PB N="7" REF="4">
<HEAD><HI>For my old Acquaintance,</HI> T. S.</HEAD>
<OPENER><SALUTE>SIR,</SALUTE></OPENER>
<P>SO long as you were taken up in collecting the Occurrences of the world, and expo&s;ing them to the publick, I thought it not good manners to di&s;turb you; but now that I have failed &s;o long, both in hearing from you, and receiving any of the&s;e little <HI>Memento's</HI> of you, I adventur'd this, to rid me of doubts. Is it po&s;&s;ible that you have quit the pen for the Witches prine? Are all your projects in &s;erving your Countrey come to exorci&s;me? Are your voluminous pains and &s;ingular contrivances regalled with Slate&punc; &s;tones? The fault certainly was yours, either that you had out-run your &s;elf and could &s;tart nothing new, or you have a&s;&s;umed too much liberty in, <HI>&amp;c.</HI> and &s;o received a check; or, as I have lately heard, your Cro&s;-langing the Countrey, in the <HI>Great Enqui|ry,</HI> doth totally take you up. Could you have &s;pared your pains, you might have found venerable ones at home, O! What a &s;weet thing is it to &s;uck the exhalations of &s;uch a Carbanado'd one? how welcome will the&s;e &s;ouls be to your World in the Moon, while they mount enwrapt in the&s;e &s;moaky &s;ulphureous vapours of the black rock, where they are pythagorically tran&s;mitted as a new colony. But I hope, <HI>Thom,</HI> if you be &s;o taken up in this enque&s;t that you are not &s;o wedded to it as you can not leave it, which I could heartily wi&s;h, or if it be otherwi&s;e that you cannot quite it <HI>brevi manu,</HI> enquire after others in the like &s;in, enough unfound out ones as yet: firk me the&s;e tran&s;gre&s;&s;ours who hath gold to choak you, digge in their Urnes, and rake not the calcined a&s;hes of that poor &s;imple deluded Sex: yet when I con&s;ider, I cannot blame you, for it is better to play at &s;mall game then &s;it out; and &s;ince you can|not acquire a fat Rebel, rather then altogether want, a lean witch will &s;till keep you in po&s;&s;e&s;&s;ion of your pretence, their &s;ins and puni&s;h|ment being equal. I &s;hall conclude with this, that you project how to &s;tay at home, for among all your Comrades none &s;hall be more de&s;ireous of it then</P>
<CLOSER><SIGNED>Your humble Servant. A. W.</SIGNED></CLOSER>
</DIV2>
<TRAILER>FINIS.</TRAILER>
<PB REF="5">
<PB REF="5">
</DIV1>
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