<!DOCTYPE ETS PUBLIC "-//UMDLPS//DTD EEBOPROOF 2.0//EN">
<ETS>
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<REVDESCR>
<CHANGE>
<DATE>2009-08-05</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>Mona Logarbo</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
</RESPSTMT>
<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch B081020.pdcc.</ITEM>
</CHANGE>
</REVDESCR>
</TEMPHEAD>
<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="UM" ID="B04537">
<STC T="W">N547</STC>
<BIBNO T="umi">99887243</BIBNO>
<VID>181953</VID>
</IDG>
<TEXT LANG="eng">
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="ballad">
<PB REF="1"><!-- PDF PAGE 7 -->
<HEAD>A New and True BALLAD of the Poet's Complaint:</HEAD>
<HEAD TYPE="sub">OR, A new Song to a new Tune, of a Young Wench living in <HI>Holbourn,</HI> with a full di&s;cription of the notab<GAP DESC="illegible" REASON="missing" EXTENT="1 letter">e Tricks put upon her by two Cornuted Suitors.</HEAD>
<ARGUMENT>
<L>Reader a&s;&s;ure thy &s;elf the thing is true,</L>
<L>And though it &s;eem full &s;trange 'tis very true;</L>
<L>I wi&s;h &s;uch Gyp&s;ies fitted all as &s;he,</L>
<L>Then would they learn much hone&s;ter to be.</L>
</ARGUMENT>
<OPENER>To a Plea&s;ant new Tune, called, <HI>I am Confirm'd, &amp;c.</HI></OPENER>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<DIV2 N="1" TYPE="part">
<LG>
<L>FAith i'm a Dog if I can gue&s;s</L>
<L>What &s;train will mo&s;t obliege the Pre&s;s:</L>
<L>'Mong&s;t twenty &s;everal things, 'tis well,</L>
<L>If one in all the &s;core will &s;ell:</L>
<L>One thing alas is thought too &s;tale,</L>
<L>Another is not fit for Sale;</L>
<L>Becau&s;e the Poets mode&s;t Rhimes,</L>
<L>Are not &s;o vicious as the Times.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>In &s;hort, one rea&s;on is, I gue&s;s,</L>
<L>They know the Poet's Moneyle&s;s;</L>
<L>And they re&s;olve to keep him &s;o,</L>
<L>By feeding him with Snap and Go:</L>
<L>Another rea&s;on may be this,</L>
<L>They'l keep him Poor as he can Pi&s;s,</L>
<L>In hopes that in a while he may</L>
<L>Be forc'd to give his pains away.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>But happen how it will, yet I</L>
<L>Once more re&s;olved am to try</L>
<L>Wither I can provide a Sallat</L>
<L>That will but plea&s;e your &s;queami&s;h Pallat:</L>
<L>The Sauce is Tart, Meat fre&s;h and new,</L>
<L>The Story no more &s;trange then true;</L>
<L>Then welcome all, fall to I pray,</L>
<L>Much Good may't do you, Sirs I &s;ay.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>In <HI>Holbourn</HI> late a Wench did dwell,</L>
<L>Known by the Name of Bouncing <HI>Nell;</HI></L>
<L>Who Courted was by Suitors two,</L>
<L>For you mu&s;t note one would not do:</L>
<L>She was a lu&s;ty &s;trapping Iade,</L>
<L>And one that pa&s;&s;ed for a Maid;</L>
<L>And her two Friends the Devil take her,</L>
<L>Were a brisk <HI>Taylor</HI> and a <HI>Baker.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Taylor after &s;ome di&s;pute,</L>
<L>Provides this La&s;s a hand&s;ome Suit;</L>
<L>Some &s;ay 'twas made of Taylor's Cabbidge</L>
<L>Yet it was too good for the Baggage</L>
<L>Nay, this &s;ame Slut her &s;elf did tell,</L>
<L>Her Sweet-heart brought it out of Hell;</L>
<L>A place beneath his Shop-board, where</L>
<L>He us'd to put ill-gotten Ware.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Baker loath to be behind,</L>
<L>Vnto his Dear prov'd not le&s;s kind;</L>
<L>And being pritty full of Money,</L>
<L>He bought a Ring to give his Honey:</L>
<L>Whereon as you mu&s;t under&s;tand,</L>
<L>VVere lovers two cla&s;pt hand in hand;</L>
<L>VVhich made her promi&s;e he alone,</L>
<L>Should &s;oon po&s;&s;e&s;s her as his own.</L>
</LG>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 N="2" TYPE="part">
<HEAD>The Second Part,</HEAD>
<OPENER>To the &s;ame Tune.</OPENER>
<LG>
<L>BVt the fal&s;e Gyp&s;ie meant not &s;o,</L>
<L>As by and by you well &s;hall know;</L>
<L>For three nights after this &s;he had,</L>
<L>Another proper lively Lad:</L>
<L>VVho took po&s;&s;e&s;&s;ion of the thing</L>
<L>Promis'd the Baker for his Ring;</L>
<L>VVhich when the Baker under&s;tood,</L>
<L>He vowed revenge by all that's good.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>He thereupon with &s;peed did go</L>
<L>Vnto the Taylor late his Foe;</L>
<L>And with a witty brisk contrival,</L>
<L>Tells the whole Story to his Rival:</L>
<L>At which he &s;wore he'd blow her down,</L>
<L>He would pull off the Gyp&s;ies Gown;</L>
<L>And the next time he did her meet,</L>
<L>VVould kick her up and down the &s;treet.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Baker &s;eeing him thus rage,</L>
<L>Speaks thus his fury to a&s;&s;wage;</L>
<L>VVe both are wrong'd alike, and I</L>
<L>VVill be revenged or will dye:</L>
<L>Let us work closely, then quoth he,</L>
<L>And make no noi&s;e, and you &s;hall &s;ee,</L>
<L>VVe'l play a prank &s;hall fit her well,</L>
<L>And make her wi&s;h her name not <HI>Nell.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Things thus concluded, they agree,</L>
<L>To make no noi&s;e of what they &s;ee;</L>
<L>They were &s;o true unto there tru&s;t,</L>
<L>That the poor Iade did not mi&s;tru&s;t.</L>
<L>They notice took of wh<GAP DESC="illegible" REASON="damage" EXTENT="2 letters"> was done,</L>
<L>But thought her &s;elf clear <GAP DESC="illegible" REASON="damage" EXTENT="1 letter">s the Sun:</L>
<L>But you &s;hall hear this &s;ubtle Shaver,</L>
<L>VVith a &s;lye trick did much be&s;lave her.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>They both went &s;treight and knockt at door,</L>
<L>As if they'd not been there before;</L>
<L>And tells her now his friend and he,</L>
<L>VVere then re&s;olved to agree:</L>
<L>And that a Supper was provided,</L>
<L>where this their ca&s;e &s;hould be decided,</L>
<L>Let her choo&s;e one, the other he,</L>
<L>Should not controul her liberty.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Away &s;he goes with the&s;e her friends,</L>
<L>VVithout mi&s;tru&s;ting of their ends;</L>
<L>They took a Coach and did convey</L>
<L>Their Lady quite another way:</L>
<L>And made the Coach-man &s;top a while,</L>
<L>Without the town near half a Mile:</L>
<L>And took her forth immediately,</L>
<L>And thus began their Roguery.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Baker cryes I under&s;tand,</L>
<L>Your Lady&s;hip hath late took Man,</L>
<L>And &s;ince you are &s;o hot 'tis meet,</L>
<L>Cold water &s;hould a&s;&s;wage your heat:</L>
<L>Of thy unfaithful Letcherous Tayle,</L>
<L>With that they both of them did trayle</L>
<L>Her to a little Pond there by,</L>
<L>And &s;ouz'd her very hand&s;omly.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Taylor being loath to be</L>
<L>Behind his friend in Courte&s;ie,</L>
<L>Lends her his helping hand, and tyes</L>
<L>Her head and face between her thighs:</L>
<L>And minding to go through &s;titch,</L>
<L>Sticks a light Candle in her Breech;</L>
<L>And in that po&s;ture leaves with jeers,</L>
<L>Her with her Coats about her ears.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>They thereupon took Coach, and pray</L>
<L>She'd make no more &s;uch Fools as they,</L>
<L>Le&s;t the next time &s;ome other Man,</L>
<L>Shew her a wor&s;e trick ten to one:</L>
<L>The Wench at la&s;t got loo&s;e, but how,</L>
<L>In truth good Reader I don't know:</L>
<L>So &s;ham'd &s;he was at what was done,</L>
<L>That home again &s;he never come.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Some &s;ay this Wenches Friends do dwell</L>
<L>Near <HI>Derby</HI> hard by <HI>Kel&s;ton-Well:</HI></L>
<L>And that &s;he is gone down to try,</L>
<L>To cure her Itching Letchery:</L>
<L>But others think the rea&s;on why,</L>
<L>She from her dwelling thus did flye,</L>
<L>VVas 'cau&s;e her &s;hame flew in her face,</L>
<L>She left the Town to &s;hun di&s;grace.</L>
</LG>
</DIV2>
</DIV1>
</BODY>
<BACK>
<DIV1 TYPE="colophon">
<P><HI>Printed for <HI>F. Coles, T. Vere, J. VVright,</HI> and <HI>J. Clarke.</HI></HI></P>
</DIV1>
</BACK>
</TEXT>
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