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<DATE>2012-12-11</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>Colm MacCrossan</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
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<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed.</ITEM>
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<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="UM" ID="B03453">
<STC T="W">F930A</STC>
<STC T="C">R177055</STC>
<BIBNO T="oclc">49520887</BIBNO>
<VID>174130</VID>
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<TEXT LANG="eng">
<FRONT>
<DIV1 TYPE="title page">
<PB REF="1">
<PB REF="1">
<P>FRIEND|SHIP.</P>
</DIV1>
<DIV1 TYPE="dedication">
<PB REF="2">
<PB REF="2">
<HEAD>To the truly honourable M^r^s <HI>A.O.</HI></HEAD>
<OPENER><SALUTE>MADAM,</SALUTE></OPENER>
<P><HI>YOu have all the</HI> Right <HI>in the world to this</HI> Trifle; <HI>for 'twas fir&s;t penn'd by your</HI> Commands, <HI>&amp; is now by them made thus more legible: who&s;e</HI> Name <HI>then &s;hould it wear but yours, who&s;e only</HI> Patronage <HI>is enough to pro|tect it, could any thing that is yours want</HI> Protection?</P>
<P><HI>Nothing but your</HI> VVill <HI>to have it &s;o could have made me come &s;o near the</HI> Pre&s;&s;e <HI>as to make u&s;e of an</HI> iron pen: <HI>for I am certainly a&s;&s;ured it cannot bear a</HI> publick &s;crutiny; <HI>nor is there any thing here fitted to the</HI> Pallat <HI>of the</HI> Times, <HI>or that will</HI> reli&s;h <HI>a &s;evere Reader.</HI></P>
<P><HI>My Comfort is it has pa&s;t your</HI> Approbation, <HI>which is all it asked, and has received no advantage from the</HI> Pre&s;&s;e, <HI>but &s;ecurity from the errours of</HI> Tran&s;cribers, <HI>(if any could be found &s;o vain:) and this I had &s;ome</HI> Rea|&s;on <HI>to be &s;olicitous of, having given it &s;o many</HI> blemi&s;hes and imperfections, <HI>that nothing but one intire</HI> Blot <HI>could cure.</HI></P>
<P><HI>The few</HI> Copies <HI>I &s;uffered to wear this</HI> character, <HI>and
<PB REF="3">none of tho&s;e</HI> Voeniall, <HI>&s;ecures me from all but</HI> mercifull <HI>eyes; and if it were po&s;sible for me to hear it commended, would &s;ecure me from</HI> vain glory <HI>too.</HI></P>
<P><HI>I remember</HI> my Lord <HI>of</HI> Cherbery <HI>having &s;ent divers copies of a Book he printed to &s;everall</HI> eminent per&s;ons <HI>beyond Sea, and receiving thence as many</HI> gratulatory Complements, <HI>was told by our</HI> excellent Selden, <HI>if He would know what people thought of his</HI> Book, <HI>He &s;hould &s;uffer it to ly on the</HI> Stall, <HI>and be &s;old by the</HI> Stationer <HI>for eighteen pence or two &s;hillings apiece. Indeed every</HI> Book <HI>an</HI> Authour <HI>gives is a</HI> Bribe, <HI>and the</HI> Recei|vers Te&s;timony <HI>made thereby rather his</HI> Civility <HI>then his</HI> Judgement.</P>
<P><HI>'Tis an old ob&s;ervation, that tho&s;e</HI> Philo&s;ophers <HI>who wrote the mo&s;t &s;evere Tractates in</HI> contempt of glory, <HI>&s;till prefixed their names to tho&s;e</HI> Pieces, <HI>as loth to lo&s;e the</HI> glory <HI>of being &s;uch</HI> Contemners. <HI>You, who are the</HI> &s;eve|re&s;t Self-denyer <HI>in the world, have taught me another le&s;|&s;on, &amp; this very</HI> Dedication <HI>may &s;erve for a</HI> Te&s;timony <HI>of that</HI> virtue <HI>in</HI> you, <HI>and that de&s;ire of it in</HI> me. <HI>For upon what other &s;core can you bear with &s;o</HI> triviall, <HI>and (to you at least) &s;o u&s;ele&s;&s;e a Piece? Or upon what other ac|count could I wrap my</HI> Name <HI>in a</HI> Di&s;gui&s;e, <HI>and de|cline the publick</HI> Honour <HI>of being known &s;o</HI> devotedly yours?</P>
<P><HI>How beneficiall any thing in the&s;e following lines may
<PB REF="3">prove to others I cannot</HI> prophe&s;ie; <HI>to you I am &s;ure it is very</HI> unnece&s;&s;ary, <HI>who have already</HI> out-done, <HI>and</HI> out-liv'd <HI>all that hath been, or can be &s;aid of</HI> Friend|&s;hip.</P>
<P><HI>When I have &s;aid that, I need not mention your other</HI> Virtues: <HI>for in my</HI> Notion <HI>of</HI> Friend&s;hip <HI>they are in|cluded. I dare not &s;o much as</HI> name <HI>them here, lea&s;t you &s;hould think me (though You would be the onely Per&s;on of that opinion) a</HI> Flatterer, <HI>which I hate as much (if po&s;|&s;ible) as I do</HI> Hell, <HI>or love</HI> Heaven <HI>and the</HI> VVay <HI>thi|ther, which is an Endearment and &V;nion with</HI> Luca&s;ia, <HI>and the being con&s;tantly and eternally</HI></P>
<CLOSER><DATE>March 30. 1654.</DATE>
<SIGNED>Your mo&s;t devoted, faithfull <HI>Palaemon.</HI></SIGNED></CLOSER>
</DIV1>
</FRONT>
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="text">
<PB REF="4">
<PB N="1" REF="4">
<OPENER><SALUTE>D. Noble <HI>Luca&s;ia-Orinda.</HI></SALUTE></OPENER>
<P>TIs not without much <HI>regret</HI> as well as <HI>di&s;ad|vantage</HI> to my &s;elf, that I <HI>di&s;obey</HI> any of your <HI>Commands.</HI> But you ought not therefore to <HI>quarrel</HI> at my <HI>Di&s;obedience:</HI> for when you require things im|po&s;sible, as <HI>ingenious Di&s;cour&s;es</HI> from <HI>Men</HI> that <HI>have it not about them;</HI> you may be &s;o mercifull as to allow your &s;elf mi&s;taken in the <HI>merits</HI> of the Per&s;on who&s;e obedience you exact, and do him &s;o much right as to acknowledge and pre&s;erve the <HI>Empire</HI> you &s;till have, by di&s;tingui&s;hing between <HI>Impotency</HI> and <HI>In|fidelity.</HI></P>
<P>The a&s;&s;urance I have that you will not ea&s;ily <HI>con|found</HI> the&s;e <HI>two,</HI> had begot &s;ome hope in me that my &s;ilence on a &s;ubject you are &s;o ab&s;olutely <HI>Mi&s;tre&s;&s;e</HI> of, <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> &s;hould have a very candid <HI>Interpreta|tion:</HI> but &s;ince you <HI>thunder</HI> out <HI>Excommunications</HI> a|gain&s;t it, and in the onely Names I <HI>reverence</HI> to &s;uch a height as takes off all colour and thoughts of di&s;|pute, <HI>Luca&s;ia</HI> and <HI>Orinda;</HI> I am re&s;olved to give you
<PB N="2" REF="5">a <HI>Te&s;timony</HI> of my <HI>Ob&s;equiou&s;ne&s;&s;e,</HI> though in it I mu&s;t al&s;o of my <HI>Inability,</HI> which you might much more to my advantage perhaps, have <HI>concluded</HI> by my &s;aying nothing.</P>
<P>How to begin I know not; and if I find it as dif|ficult to end, I may po&s;sibly &s;well this into a <HI>bulk in|congruous</HI> for a <HI>letter,</HI> and I am &s;ure aforehand it will neither have <HI>Method</HI> nor <HI>Solidity</HI> enough to de&s;erve the appellation of a <HI>Treati&s;e,</HI> or <HI>Di&s;cour&s;e.</HI></P>
<P>Some order I would willingly ob&s;erve, without any confinement to &s;trict <HI>Philo&s;ophicall Definitions</HI> of, and inquiries into it, or <HI>Hi&s;toricall Deductions</HI> of its <HI>O|rigination, Ri&s;e,</HI> and <HI>Growth,</HI> enumerated in &s;everall <HI>Examples,</HI> whereof we have little left be&s;ides the <HI>Names.</HI></P>
<P>But however he that were happy enough in his <HI>Proficiency</HI> in &s;o <HI>ble&s;&s;ed</HI> a <HI>My&s;tery</HI> as <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> as to pen all it de&s;erved with all the <HI>accuratene&s;&s;e</HI> de&s;ireable, might (as farre as I yet under&s;tand) comprehend all under the&s;e three heads, The <HI>Nature</HI> of it, The <HI>Cau&s;es</HI> of it, and the <HI>Benefit</HI> and <HI>&V;&s;e</HI> of it. And the&s;e three I &s;hall touch at.</P>
<P>Fir&s;t, by the <HI>Nature</HI> of it I do not mean the <HI>Na|turall Cau&s;es</HI> of it, for that were to confound the <HI>fir&s;t member</HI> of my <HI>Divi&s;ion</HI> with the <HI>&s;econd.</HI> But by <HI>Na|ture</HI> here I mean <HI>Quality</HI> or <HI>Condition.</HI> And perhaps it
<PB N="3" REF="5">is not prepo&s;terous to &s;ee fir&s;t <HI>what</HI> kind of thing this <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is, before we ask <HI>whence</HI> it comes; for here|by tho&s;e who are not &s;atisfied with the <HI>value</HI> and qua|lity of it, may &s;pare further que&s;tions concerning it as <HI>u&s;ele&s;&s;e</HI> and <HI>impertinent.</HI></P>
<P>Some have been &s;o prodigall in their <HI>Encomiums</HI> and de&s;criptions of <HI>Love,</HI> that they have not been content to keep the other <HI>Pa&s;sions</HI> at a ju&s;t <HI>distance</HI> and <HI>&s;ubjection,</HI> but have quite <HI>&s;wallowed</HI> them up: and by making the <HI>objects</HI> of every <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> lovely in the <HI>eyes</HI> of that <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> whereby they are pur&s;ued, have taken away the proper name of that <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> and <HI>ana|bapti&s;ed</HI> it <HI>Love.</HI> And thus the <HI>Extreams</HI> of a <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> which hardly avoid being <HI>vitious</HI> where the <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> it &s;elf is <HI>virtuous,</HI> mu&s;t carry the plau&s;ible <HI>in&s;cription</HI> of <HI>Love,</HI> though <HI>Love</HI> it &s;elf be thereby brought in|to <HI>Dete&s;tation. Ambition</HI> is hence &s;tiled the <HI>Love</HI> of <HI>Honour,</HI> Covetou&s;ne&s;&s;e the <HI>Love</HI> of Money. But it is not the name of Love can excu&s;e, much le&s;&s;e <HI>trans|form Vice</HI> into Virtue; for <HI>Love</HI> it &s;elf is like the <HI>Pla|net Mercury,</HI> which hath no influence properly its own, but follows the <HI>predomination</HI> of tho&s;e other Planets with whom he is in <HI>Conjunction,</HI> and &s;o is good with the good, bad with the bad: and ju&s;t &s;o is <HI>Love,</HI> vitious or virtuous according to its objects.</P>
<P>But re&s;erving to every <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> its due <HI>Name,</HI> and
<PB N="4" REF="6">to <HI>Love</HI> its ju&s;t <HI>Superiority,</HI> I &s;hall believe I have done that and <HI>Friend&s;hip Right</HI> together, when I have &s;aid, <HI>Love is the Crown and Perfection of all our Pa&s;si|ons, Friend&s;hip of our Love.</HI> I bate not the highe&s;t pitch of Love, our <HI>Love</HI> to <HI>God,</HI> for <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> crowns that too: which I &s;hall not take much pains to prove, if <HI>Abrahams</HI> love of God and Gods of him be allowed of as high a degree as any others mentioned in <HI>Scripture;</HI> (and &s;urely 'tis no prodiga|lity to give &s;o much to the <HI>Father of the faithfull.</HI>) 'Tis more then once that <HI>Abraham</HI> is &s;tiled in Scripture <HI>the Friend of God.</HI>
<NOTE PLACE="marg">2 <HI>Chron.</HI> 20.7. <HI>I&s;a.</HI> 41.8. <HI>James</HI> 2.23.</NOTE> And we find one of the highe&s;t and con&s;tituent qualities and effects of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> expre&s;&s;ed clearly by <HI>God</HI> in the preambulatory chapter to <HI>Sodoms</HI> de&s;truction, to wit, <HI>Communication</HI> of &s;ecrets and coun&s;els; <HI>Shall I</HI> (&s;ayes God) <HI>hide from Abraham the thing I am about to do?</HI> What followes we know, a po&s;itive Declara|tion of the doom of <HI>Sodom,</HI> and a conce&s;sion of all tho&s;e <HI>Conditions</HI> and <HI>Qualifications</HI> for the rever&s;ing the Decree and pre&s;ervation of the place, <HI>Abraham</HI> could think fit to de&s;ire.</P>
<P>But to come out of the clouds, and de&s;cend to the proper &s;tage of Friend&s;hip, (and if you believe <HI>Guz|man,</HI> the onely true Friend) the <HI>Earth:</HI> I do not think the love of any <HI>Relation</HI> hath that Candour,
<PB N="5" REF="6">Vigour, Complacency, and eminent Perfection, which is in the <HI>love</HI> of <HI>Friends.</HI> And the rea&s;on here|of (to my pre&s;ent apprehen&s;ion) is, That in all other <HI>Relations,</HI> whether <HI>Naturall</HI> or <HI>Politick,</HI> our love is a <HI>Duty impo&s;ed;</HI> in this a Duty too, but freely cho&s;en at fir&s;t, and made &s;o by our &s;elves. Now regularly, what ever we are bound to by a Law, we look on as an <HI>incroachment</HI> upon and <HI>abridgement</HI> of our <HI>freedome,</HI> and be the thing never &s;o good we are ob|lig'd to, it alters not our conception of, and <HI>quarrel</HI> to the <HI>Obligation;</HI> and hence we qualifie our <HI>Obedience</HI> as much as we can, and think we have &s;haken off a yoke and piece of &s;ervitude, when we have found out a way to &s;lacken our dependance on tho&s;e <HI>Rela|tions:</HI> In this ca&s;e we are all like <HI>Princes,</HI> who take it very unkindly to have their <HI>Coun&s;ellours</HI> and <HI>Confi|dents</HI> appointed them by their <HI>Father;</HI> and therefore, as they u&s;ually do at their Fathers death, we count it the fir&s;t part of our <HI>Royalty</HI> to advance &s;ome new <HI>Fa|vourite,</HI> and the &s;tranger the better we think, becau&s;e it gives the clearer te&s;timony of our <HI>Ab&s;olutene&s;&s;e.</HI></P>
<P>Notwith&s;tanding all which, it is a great happine&s;s, and rather to be wi&s;hed then found, that the <HI>Relati|ons of Bloud</HI> (e&s;pecially the mo&s;t capable ones) might twine and grow up into tho&s;e of <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> that where Nature hath made &s;ome <HI>Ties,</HI> we may adde
<PB N="6" REF="7">others, and &s;o twi&s;t a <HI>Cord</HI> into a &s;trength not ea&s;ily broken. But to effect this there mu&s;t be an <HI>Allyance</HI> or corre&s;pondence of <HI>Souls</HI> and <HI>Humours,</HI> as well as <HI>bloud,</HI> and where they may be found, there is not a|ny con&s;anguinity in an equall degree (as between <HI>Brothers</HI> and <HI>Si&s;ters</HI>) which ought to hinder the <HI>&s;tricter union</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI> And though <HI>Diver&s;ity</HI> and (may be) <HI>Contrariety</HI> of Humour hinder &s;o happy a progre&s;sion; yet this mu&s;t not unravel the affection Nature knits 'twixt tho&s;e of &s;uch affinity. There is a va&s;t difference betwixt admi&s;sion of one into my deare&s;t thoughts, and exclu&s;ion of him from all: and before we have done with all the requi&s;ites towards making a <HI>Friend,</HI> we &s;hall certainly find it highly nece&s;&s;ary He be not without <HI>naturall affe|ction.</HI></P>
<P>It is hardly worth the while to enquire why it is &s;o rare to find a <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> contracted 'twixt <HI>Rela|tives.</HI> But the wonder, if it be one, is taken off, if we con&s;ider that their <HI>Souls</HI> are of as different <HI>makes</HI> as if their Per&s;ons had no Relation. For either the <HI>Fa|ther</HI> does not beget the <HI>Soul</HI> of the <HI>Child;</HI> or if he does, &s;ince no man differs more from another then the &s;ame man at &s;everall times does from him&s;elf, the <HI>next child</HI> may be of as contrary a frame of &s;pirit, as if he had been the <HI>i&s;&s;ue</HI> of a <HI>stranger.</HI></P>
<PB N="7" REF="7">
<P>Now in Relations which have not that equality, as <HI>Father</HI> and <HI>Son,</HI> and the like, or <HI>Politick</HI> Relati|ons, as <HI>King</HI> and <HI>Subject,</HI> the inequality and aw crea|ted thence quite de&s;troyes po&s;sibility of <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> and this incapacity of the greate&s;t happine&s;&s;e here, is the &s;harpe&s;t <HI>Thorn</HI> in a <HI>Kings Crown.</HI> Some one King may be there is of &s;o extraordinary a <HI>Genius,</HI> as by unvailing much of his Maje&s;ty, and de&s;cend|ing to appear in an addre&s;&s;e and conver&s;e more fami|liar &amp; obliging, may arrive at the felicity of <HI>Friend|&s;hip:</HI> but I mu&s;t not name him, le&s;t <HI>Hi&s;torians</HI> ex|plode the Narration (as fabulous) and <HI>Politicians Him.</HI></P>
<P>And 'tis &s;o certain that <HI>Superiority, whether Na|turall or acquired, forbids Friend&s;hip,</HI> that every place will give you examples of &s;tricter <HI>&V;nions</HI> 'twixt <HI>younger Brothers</HI> one with another, then any of them with the <HI>elder;</HI> e&s;pecially if the elder Brother hath a kind of <HI>adopted Paternity</HI> over the younger, and they depend wholly upon him.</P>
<P>If any <HI>Love</HI> may &s;tand in competition with that of <HI>Friends,</HI> it is the <HI>Conjugall;</HI> and that, if any where, where the <HI>Marriage</HI> was purely the choice and congruity of the Per&s;ons united, without the <HI>Bya&s;&s;e</HI> of other <HI>Intere&s;ts</HI> which u&s;ually bear a great &s;way in that Union.</P>
<PB N="8" REF="8">
<P>Now even here, unle&s;&s;e the <HI>Love</HI> proceed to a <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> it is &s;hort of what it might come to, and of that <HI>Pa&s;sion</HI> which the very <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> have towards others, if &s;o be they are really and indeed <HI>Friends</HI> to any. There be many can adore one as a <HI>Mi&s;tre&s;&s;e,</HI> affect her for a <HI>Wife,</HI> and yet believe her not &s;o pro|per for all the <HI>Relations</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> More that while &s;he is a <HI>Mistre&s;&s;e</HI> believe her fit for all tho&s;e offices, and find them&s;elves afterwards deceived.</P>
<P>But to bring <HI>Marriage</HI> and <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> into <HI>Compe|tition,</HI> allowing onely to <HI>Marriage</HI> the legal and or|dinary Union, I think it will be pa&s;t di&s;pute where the <HI>Tran&s;cendency</HI> lies, if we admit the mo&s;t unque|&s;tionable <HI>Gradation</HI> that can be any where de&s;ired. Take it as it lies in <HI>Deuteronomy,</HI> the 13. <HI>chapter,</HI> and a|bout the 6. or 7. <HI>ver&s;e:</HI> where <HI>God</HI> commanding <HI>en|ticers to Idolatry</HI> how near &s;oever to be put to death, thus reckons them up; <HI>If thy brother the Son of thy Mother, or thy own Son, or Daughter, if the Wife of thy bo&s;ome,</HI> nay if thy <HI>Friend, which is as thine own &s;oul,</HI> en|tice thee to Idolatry, &amp;c. thou &s;halt not &s;pare them. Higher then a <HI>Friend</HI> we cannot go. There be tho&s;e would &s;acrifice their other Relations for the pre&s;er|vation of this; but he that can be per&s;waded not to &s;pare this, needs little weaning from the re&s;t. It is not po&s;sible for me to go higher in evincing the ex|cellency
<PB N="9" REF="8">of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> in relation to all other <HI>Loves.</HI> Let us look a little nearer and more narrowly into its Nature and Qualities.</P>
<P>One I have already mentioned, its being <HI>Commu|nicative:</HI> and this keeps <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> in perpetuall <HI>Mo|tion</HI> and <HI>Action,</HI> and &s;o makes it more re&s;plendent. By this a private per&s;on is happier then his <HI>Prince,</HI> all his Actions and Coun&s;els being &s;ubjected to a more ingenuous and free debate, and the re&s;ult given more impartially, according to true <HI>Intere&s;t,</HI> not af|fections, and what is wor&s;e, <HI>para&s;iticall cockering</HI> of the <HI>humour.</HI></P>
<P>Then <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> hath an <HI>&V;niting quality,</HI> it makes two as it were <HI>One,</HI> but &s;o as the <HI>Communication</HI> is hereby increa&s;ed: for who can doubt di&s;clo&s;ing what troubles or perplexes him to one <HI>&s;o much him&s;elf?</HI> 'tis but appealing from my <HI>di&s;temper'd</HI> &s;elf, to my &s;elf <HI>compos'd;</HI> all the difference is for my advantage: and when my <HI>Pallat</HI> is down or my <HI>&s;ight vitiated</HI> by &s;ome ill-acquired <HI>Tincture,</HI> I have the advantage left of a <HI>Ta&s;t</HI> and <HI>Sight</HI> uncorrupted, which re&s;tores me to as perfect a Judgement as if I were in my own <HI>Nature</HI> infallible.</P>
<P>Thirdly, <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is <HI>Secret:</HI> its communicative|ne&s;&s;e extends no further then its Relation. And this is the very <HI>Prop</HI> and <HI>Support</HI> of all the comforts it is
<PB N="10" REF="9">capable of imparting by virtue of its other <HI>Qualities.</HI> 'Tis the <HI>Harbour</HI> in which the weather-beaten friend is &s;afe after all &s;torms. One cannot readily in&s;tance a greater <HI>incapacity</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> then a <HI>Spongy Na|ture;</HI> one ready to &s;uck in what &s;ecrets you plea&s;e, but as ready to give them up to the fir&s;t <HI>hand</HI> that calls for them. The Boy in <HI>Plutarch</HI> that having no where to hide a live <HI>Fox</HI> he had &s;tole, but next his skin, and being pur&s;ued for the crime, cho&s;e rather to have his <HI>Bowels</HI> gnaw'd out by it, then confe&s;&s;e the <HI>Theft,</HI> &s;hould teach us a greater <HI>constancy of Na|ture.</HI></P>
<P>He that <HI>betrayes</HI> the <HI>Secrets</HI> of his friend intru&s;ted to him is <HI>doubly guilty,</HI> and by adding <HI>Fraud</HI> to his Violence, and breach of the greate&s;t tru&s;t to his Robbery, has withall done execution upon him&s;elf too, and lives branded and infamous to that degree, that the <HI>Gallows,</HI> which his De&s;peration of &s;o much Mercy may in time make him find way to, &s;hall be thought a <HI>Pardon.</HI></P>
<P>La&s;tly, <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is <HI>virtuous;</HI> for indeed nothing that is not &s;o is or can be la&s;ting. Nor can one long retain a good opinion of <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> otherwi&s;e habited. <HI>It delights in nothing more then pre&s;erving tho&s;e in the paths of virtue who&s;e inclinations hearken to the wor&s;e.</HI> And that very con&s;ideration hath re&s;trained many
<PB N="11" REF="9">from cour&s;es which, but for the intere&s;t and pre&s;er|vation of their <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> they would have embra|ced to their <HI>Ruine.</HI></P>
<P>I deny not but there may be &s;ome kind of Union betwixt <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> of a <HI>Complexion</HI> very <HI>different</HI> from <HI>virtuous:</HI> but that is a <HI>Combination,</HI> not a <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> and though the <HI>Covenant</HI> be never &s;o <HI>Solemn, will be like an Almanack out of Date,</HI> as &s;oon as the precious <HI>Ends</HI> for which it was contracted are <HI>accompli&s;hed.</HI></P>
<P>When I have &s;aid <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is <HI>virtuous,</HI> I have given it its proper <HI>Title,</HI> but too <HI>comprehen&s;ive</HI> to be in&s;tanced in particularly in the &s;everall Exerci&s;es of its virtue. And much of that Nature will fall under con&s;ideration in de&s;cending to &s;peak of the <HI>Benefit</HI> and <HI>&V;&s;e</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> &s;omewhat, in inquiring into the <HI>Cau&s;es</HI> of it, which I now am come to.</P>
<P>The <HI>Cau&s;es</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> are either &s;uch as re&s;pect <HI>our de&s;ire</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> in <HI>generall,</HI> or more <HI>particular|ly</HI> our contracting it with this or that <HI>Per&s;on</HI> rather then another; which may as properly be called the <HI>Occa&s;ions</HI> of our <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI> The fir&s;t are <HI>&V;niver&s;al|ly Naturall,</HI> our common Nature and Principles of Humanity nece&s;&s;arily put us upon the <HI>acqui&s;ition</HI> of <HI>Friends.</HI> There is an <HI>innate de&s;ire</HI> in every man from the Principles of <HI>Self-pre&s;ervation,</HI> to make his <HI>party</HI> as &s;trong and con&s;iderable as he can, by ingaging
<PB N="12" REF="10">&s;ome other to the protection of that <HI>Self</HI> which is &s;o <HI>dear</HI> to him.</P>
<P>Again, <HI>Man</HI> being naturally a <HI>Sociable Creature,</HI> and a common outward formal <HI>Conver&s;e</HI> being very empty and un&s;atisfactory to a <HI>communicative Spirit,</HI> e&s;pecially as the world commonly goes, when <HI>Peo|ple</HI> watch like <HI>Wolves</HI> to make a <HI>Prey</HI> one of another; <HI>the Soul boils</HI> and grows impatient, till it find &s;ome|what where it may more <HI>freely</HI> and <HI>&s;afely</HI> dilate it &s;elf, and that cannot be any where but in the <HI>Bo&s;om</HI> of a <HI>Friend.</HI> The inhabitants of the <HI>Air</HI> and <HI>De&s;arts,</HI> Birds and wild Bea&s;ts are farre more innocent <HI>Au|ditours</HI> of our <HI>Complaints</HI> or <HI>Di&s;cour&s;es,</HI> then Man, un|le&s;&s;e <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> hath <HI>civilized</HI> him. And &s;ince our <HI>Pa&s;sions</HI> mu&s;t either have <HI>vent</HI> or they will <HI>bur&s;t us,</HI> 'tis not onely nece&s;&s;ary to &s;eek the onely proper re|lief, a <HI>Friend,</HI> but very advi&s;able till we find one, to put <HI>Demo&s;thenes</HI> practice for the cure of his &s;tam|mering afoot again, and like him <HI>Harangue</HI> it to the <HI>Woods.</HI></P>
<P>In a word, the mi&s;erable uncomfortable Solitude of being without a <HI>Friend,</HI> the incapacity of advi&s;ing our &s;elves or taking di&s;creet <HI>Coun&s;els,</HI> &s;ince <HI>He who teacheth him&s;elf hath alwayes a fool to his Ma&s;ter,</HI> the unrelievablene&s;&s;e of our <HI>bad condition,</HI> the unplea|&s;antne&s;&s;e of our <HI>be&s;t</HI> for want of a congratulating
<PB N="13" REF="10">partner, are powerfull <HI>incentives</HI> of this <HI>De&s;ire of Friend&s;hip</HI> in all Men.</P>
<P>But then particular <HI>Friend&s;hips,</HI> and with one ra|ther then another, are the <HI>re&s;ults</HI> of <HI>particular Na|tures</HI> and <HI>Fancies;</HI> &s;ometimes, which are guided by a prevalent <HI>Humour</HI> to con&s;ort with the <HI>Di&s;po&s;ition</HI> they choo&s;e; and other times perhaps are <HI>contracted</HI> not by particularity of choice, preferring the per&s;on cho&s;en to all others, but by &s;ome accidentall occa&s;i|onall circum&s;tance offering that <HI>Per&s;on</HI> to an <HI>endear|ment,</HI> which our Naturall De&s;ire and indeed <HI>Ne|ce&s;sitie</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> makes us eagerly embrace.</P>
<P>VVhat the <HI>Common Occa&s;ions</HI> or Cau&s;es of con|tracting Friend&s;hips are, may be u&s;efull for our in|quiry, e&s;pecially if we de&s;ire to pre&s;erve any of our concernes from too ha&s;ty and <HI>unadvi&s;ed contracts</HI> of that kind. This Caution is indeed as <HI>nece&s;&s;ary</HI> and as much to the advantage of tho&s;e committed to our Care, as the very &s;upervi&s;ing their <HI>Marriages:</HI> A Cro&s;&s;e and misfortune in the <HI>Election</HI> of a <HI>Friend</HI> as fatall as of a <HI>Wife.</HI> Therefore though <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> it &s;elf be <HI>virtuous,</HI> yet all <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> of all ages and <HI>Tem|pers</HI> are no fit di&s;po&s;ers of them&s;elves; no more then in <HI>Marriage, which is virtuous and honourable,</HI> but yet does not pre&s;erve all tho&s;e &s;uch who enter in|to it.</P>
<PB N="14" REF="11">
<P>The <HI>Con&s;titutions</HI> of Men are <HI>various:</HI> &s;ome of a &s;erene, free, tran&s;parent, open <HI>Genius</HI> from their <HI>Cra|dles,</HI> of a &s;oft tender affectionate <HI>Nature,</HI> and if they follow the guidance of their own thoughts before they come to a <HI>Maturity</HI> of <HI>Judgement,</HI> are ea&s;ily in&s;nared by tho&s;e of a more &s;ubtle and <HI>naturally di&s;|&s;embling temper,</HI> and &s;o may by &s;uch as &s;tudy onely their ownadvantage, by a few fair words and <HI>left|handed</HI> kindne&s;&s;es, in the <HI>dayes</HI> of their <HI>Credulity,</HI> be betrayed into an endearment, from which they ex|pect the <HI>Name</HI> of <HI>Friend,</HI> when more truely that of <HI>Stalking-hor&s;e</HI> fits better the u&s;e they are put to.</P>
<P>The <HI>Common Occa&s;ions</HI> of beginning <HI>Friend|&s;hips</HI> with particular Per&s;ons, are either <HI>a long ac|quaintance,</HI> begun e&s;pecially in the Age of greate&s;t <HI>tenderne&s;&s;e</HI> and <HI>fondne&s;&s;e,</HI> but lea&s;t <HI>judgement;</HI> or when we come to under&s;tanding, a <HI>&s;en&s;e of Gratitude</HI> where we are obliged highly upon <HI>&s;lender</HI> or no <HI>me|rit;</HI> at lea&s;t not particularly <HI>applyed</HI> to the per&s;on ob|liging. The <HI>Naturall</HI> and <HI>Congeniall Return of Love is Love,</HI> it will not be <HI>barter'd</HI> for any thing el&s;e, nor admit any other thing in <HI>Exchange for it:</HI> and though it brings all things with it, as <HI>he that gives him&s;elf will &s;urely deny nothing;</HI> yet it brings <HI>it &s;elf,</HI> which is <HI>better</HI> then all, and without which all the re&s;t is <HI>nothing.</HI></P>
<P>Now who&s;oever de&s;ires to grow into a <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI>
<PB N="15" REF="11">with a particular <HI>Per&s;on,</HI> whom his own ob&s;ervation (as farre as a &s;tranger can ob&s;erve) and a <HI>generall Fame</HI> hath recommended to his thoughts, will quick|ly be ingenious enough to find wayes of expre&s;sing the <HI>E&s;teem</HI> He hath, and <HI>Endearment</HI> He de&s;ires: and if the <HI>Re&s;entment</HI> be an&s;werable to <HI>Expectation,</HI> which it will be if there be any of that <HI>Common In|genuity</HI> which a truely noble and <HI>friendly Nature</HI> is alwayes furni&s;hed with, here is a fair foundation laid whereon to build a firm and la&s;ting <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI></P>
<P>But becau&s;e no <HI>Per&s;on</HI> credits <HI>Fame</HI> enough to take up <HI>Friend&s;hip on Tru&s;t</HI> from her, though he may receive thence great <HI>praevious inclinations,</HI> and &s;uch as may go very farre in blinding his <HI>Judgement</HI> when he hath greate&s;t <HI>&V;&s;e</HI> of it; we may con&s;ider that the fir&s;t ordinary <HI>de&s;ignation</HI> of the <HI>Per&s;on</HI> we af|fect, (where we have not been prepo&s;&s;e&s;&s;ed with a <HI>Traditionall Merit</HI> in him) is from the <HI>Eyes;</HI> and 'tis the <HI>Eye too</HI> that where we have tru&s;ted much to <HI>Re|port,</HI> gives the fir&s;t <HI>Te&s;timony</HI> of our <HI>a&s;&s;ent</HI> to its <HI>Ve|racity.</HI></P>
<P>Every <HI>Motion, Pa&s;sion, Affection,</HI> and <HI>Alteration</HI> of the <HI>Soul,</HI> is indeed fir&s;t perceptible in the <HI>Eye,</HI> the motions whereof are much nimbler then of any o|ther <HI>part;</HI> and I have known <HI>Blu&s;hes vi&s;ible</HI> in the <HI>Eyes</HI> of tho&s;e who&s;e <HI>Bloud</HI> hath come much &s;lower
<PB N="16" REF="12">into their <HI>Face,</HI> and onely time enough to te&s;tify that they were not deceived who read their <HI>Blu&s;hes</HI> in their <HI>Eyes before.</HI></P>
<P>Nor is the <HI>Eye</HI> merely <HI>Declaratory</HI> of our choice, but <HI>in&s;trumentall</HI> in it too. All men believe (or by their practice &s;eem to believe) that from the <HI>A&s;pect, Countenance, Meine, Aire,</HI> or <HI>Spiritous Re&s;ultance</HI> (ari&s;ing from the <HI>Compo&s;ure</HI> of the <HI>Face</HI>) call it which you plea&s;e, a <HI>&s;hrewd Judgement</HI> is to be made of the <HI>Nature</HI> and <HI>Conditions:</HI> And the <HI>Principles</HI> of this <HI>Philo&s;ophy</HI> are probably clear, if the <HI>Rules</HI> to reduce them into <HI>Practice</HI> were &s;o. But however, we all al|low our &s;elves &s;o well skill'd in this <HI>Phy&s;iognomy,</HI> that we venture to <HI>de&s;cant</HI> to our &s;elves upon the <HI>Conditi|ons</HI> of a whole <HI>Company,</HI> though merely <HI>Strangers</HI> to us, and &s;hall <HI>preferre</HI> &s;ome and <HI>condemn</HI> others, <HI>right</HI> or <HI>wrong,</HI> becau&s;e <HI>Our</HI> (may be deceiving) <HI>Sight</HI> hath imprinted <HI>Characters</HI> in us to their <HI>favour</HI> or <HI>pre|judice.</HI></P>
<P><HI>Two,</HI> though never &s;o e&s;tranged to us, can hardly contend either in <HI>Fight</HI> or <HI>Play,</HI> but that we &s;hall be <HI>factious</HI> in our wi&s;hes and fancies for the one rather then the other: and amid&s;t a throng of &s;uch we ne|ver &s;aw before, <HI>our Eye</HI> will fix on and mark out <HI>&s;ome one</HI> or other, as a more de&s;ireable <HI>Object</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> then all there be&s;ides.</P>
<PB N="17" REF="12">
<P>VVhen we have gone thus farre, we cannot be &s;o much wanting to our own <HI>&s;atisfaction</HI> as not to <HI>ex|periment</HI> by innocent arts and applications whether we are deceived in our <HI>Judgement</HI> of that <HI>Per&s;on:</HI> and if we are, the comfort is the <HI>Errour</HI> is not <HI>fatal;</HI> for no <HI>Reflections of unkindne&s;&s;e,</HI> or rather e&s;trange|ment from one for whom we have onely <HI>harboured</HI> an extraordinary <HI>good opinion,</HI> without a progre&s;&s;e to mutuall endearments, will proceed to <HI>Heart-break|ings</HI> and <HI>dyings for Love.</HI></P>
<P>The fir&s;t <HI>experimentall applications</HI> in order to this di&s;covery are, <HI>Ob&s;ervation</HI> of the <HI>Inclinations</HI> of &s;uch per&s;on, and <HI>practicall compliances</HI> with them as much as is po&s;sible, particular addre&s;&s;es of the <HI>Eyc</HI> and <HI>Di&s;|cour&s;e</HI> to that per&s;on, <HI>un&s;atisfactorine&s;&s;e</HI> in other com|pany where that may be had, and a greedy catching at Opportunities of doing <HI>Civilities</HI> of &s;uch a <HI>Nature</HI> as flow not from <HI>Principles</HI> of <HI>mere Civility;</HI> all which if received as meant, will not be long without very <HI>&s;en&s;ible Returns,</HI> &s;uch as our &s;elves could wi&s;h.</P>
<P>But if the <HI>Eye</HI> be <HI>tinctured</HI> with <HI>&s;elfi&s;hne&s;&s;e,</HI> and the&s;e <HI>common Organs</HI> of Election <HI>vitiated</HI> and indi&s;|po&s;ed by &s;ome &s;uch ill <HI>predominant</HI> humour, if either an extraordinary <HI>Moro&s;ity</HI> of <HI>Nature,</HI> want of <HI>Na|turall affection, Pride,</HI> and <HI>Self-conceitedne&s;se,</HI> or in a word any vitious and <HI>contrariant Habit</HI> to the <HI>Piety</HI>
<PB N="18" REF="13">and <HI>Innocency</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> makes our &s;ight perfect|ly u&s;ele&s;&s;e to the <HI>Settlement</HI> of our Judgement con|cerning the <HI>aptitude</HI> of any one to the <HI>Relation</HI> we are &s;peaking of, it is a very impertinent labour to de&s;igne other <HI>Rules for his guidance,</HI> &s;ince till tho&s;e impediments be remov'd and his <HI>Eye-&s;ight clear'd,</HI> he is incapable of being a <HI>Friend.</HI></P>
<P>Now &s;ince <HI>Nature</HI> as well as <HI>Manners</HI> hath &s;ome <HI>contradictions</HI> to <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> and tho&s;e not &s;o ea&s;ily removeable neither, (for, by the way, though all men do <HI>naturally appetite Friend&s;hip,</HI> they are not <HI>ca|pable</HI> of the perfection of it, and yet to &s;atisfie their naturall nece&s;sities of it, they mu&s;t have &s;ome|what like, or in&s;tead of it) we have the more <HI>Rea&s;on</HI> to proceed <HI>lei&s;urely</HI> and with deliberation our &s;elves in a thing of &s;o great concernment as the chu|&s;ing a <HI>Friend,</HI> and retard the Election of tho&s;e of a more tender age (within our verge) who are not yet arrived at <HI>Di&s;cretion</HI> to make <HI>Judgement</HI> of their own <HI>Nature,</HI> much le&s;&s;e of anothers.</P>
<P>And though we could po&s;sibly afford them &s;ome help in <HI>deciphering</HI> the <HI>Nature</HI> of their <HI>Compeeres,</HI> that being as legible, to a con&s;idering and <HI>that-way|intelligent Per&s;on,</HI> in a <HI>&s;mall Print,</HI> even <HI>Childhood,</HI> as a <HI>fairer Letter:</HI> Yet their <HI>Manners</HI> depending com|monly upon imbibed <HI>Principles,</HI> and alwayes upon
<PB N="19" REF="13"><HI>Cu&s;tome</HI> and <HI>Practice</HI> (whereby now and then they are &s;wayed again&s;t their Principles) it cannot be &s;afe to enter into &s;o &s;trict an <HI>&V;nion,</HI> which invovles them in the &s;ame cour&s;es, till they have given <HI>Evidences</HI> of a <HI>life</HI> &s;ea&s;oned with &s;o much <HI>Religion</HI> and <HI>Morality</HI> together as will not in probability mi&s;carry.</P>
<P>'Tis true, our <HI>Younger yeares</HI> are not capable of the <HI>Seriou&s;ne&s;&s;e</HI> and <HI>Solidities</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> but notwith|&s;tanding that they are very apt for the contracting <HI>Habituall Inclinations</HI> to the con&s;tant companions of our <HI>Conver&s;e,</HI> and tho&s;e not &s;o ea&s;ily <HI>eradicated</HI> after|wards, when there appears ju&s;t cau&s;e to wi&s;h they never had <HI>footing</HI> or <HI>Plantation.</HI></P>
<P>Some are &s;o <HI>&s;evere,</HI> they will not allow the <HI>Bonds</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> to be entred into before tho&s;e of <HI>Ma|trimony:</HI> for this being the <HI>Criticall change</HI> (or if you will, <HI>beginning</HI>) of <HI>our life,</HI> and the <HI>E&s;pou&s;all</HI> of new <HI>Intere&s;ts,</HI> perhaps they may be &s;uch as are <HI>prejudici|all</HI> to, or <HI>incon&s;i&s;tent</HI> with our former friend&s;hips; which will beget a &s;trange and bitter <HI>conflict</HI> in the <HI>Soul,</HI> wherein which <HI>Side</HI> &s;oever gets the better, the Man is <HI>mi&s;erable</HI> and <HI>unfortunate,</HI> and hath no cau&s;e to <HI>triumph</HI> for the <HI>Victory.</HI> For indeed in <HI>Civil warres of old, the Romans never allowed the Conquerour to ride in Triumph.</HI> Therefore the <HI>&s;everity</HI> is very &s;afe and u&s;efull, e&s;pecially if <HI>exerci&s;ed by one over him&s;elf:</HI> for
<PB N="20" REF="14">&s;o long he is free and happy, while his <HI>Pa&s;sions</HI> are in his <HI>own Subjection</HI> and Awe, and no bodies el&s;e.</P>
<P>But then He who is arrived at this <HI>Empire</HI> over him&s;elf, is not &s;o ea&s;ily engaged in <HI>Marriage oppo|&s;ite</HI> to and <HI>de&s;tructive</HI> of his <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> and hath <HI>Pru|dence</HI> enough to reconcile tho&s;e &s;eeming or (if reall) ill-grounded <HI>Oppo&s;itions.</HI> For it is the <HI>Di&s;ea&s;e</HI> and <HI>Corruption</HI> of our Natures that <HI>animates</HI> the&s;e <HI>contra|ry Intere&s;ts,</HI> and &s;eeks to give <HI>Feuds</HI> a greater <HI>duration</HI> then <HI>Amities.</HI> And yet we find this <HI>di&s;ea&s;e</HI> very <HI>catching.</HI></P>
<P>For very &s;eldome do we find <HI>Friendline&s;&s;e</HI> de&s;cend in a <HI>Bloud.</HI> The next generations and de&s;cents may, for the <HI>fre&s;hne&s;se</HI> of the <HI>Example,</HI> and <HI>Speech of Peo|ple,</HI> keep in rea&s;onable good <HI>Intelligence;</HI> but at the &s;e|cond or third <HI>de&s;cent</HI> they look upon them&s;elves like <HI>Co&s;in-Germans</HI> &s;o many times <HI>removed:</HI> and as they by a <HI>popular errour</HI> believe them&s;elves incapable of <HI>Intermarriage,</HI> which in a <HI>nearer Degree</HI> they hold <HI>lawfull;</HI> &s;o the&s;e <HI>are,</HI> or at lea&s;t commonly <HI>act</HI> in re|lation to the <HI>continuance</HI> of the old, or <HI>contracting</HI> of new <HI>Friend&s;hips.</HI></P>
<P>Nay, what is more <HI>unpardonable</HI> then all this, you &s;hall &s;ometimes &s;ee the <HI>&s;urviving Friend</HI> wholly un|concern'd in the <HI>Relations</HI> of him decea&s;ed, at lea&s;t <HI>too-too-forgetfull</HI> of the precious <HI>Reliques</HI> of his <HI>Friend.</HI>
<PB N="21" REF="14">But where that happens, it &s;hews clearly, if either of them did love really, <HI>who</HI> loved be&s;t; a <HI>Controver&s;ie</HI> (and the onely one) <HI>irreconcileable</HI> 'twixt the <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> them&s;elves while <HI>alive.</HI></P>
<P>And would we had no <HI>Examples</HI> of this kind in our own <HI>ob&s;ervation.</HI> But the &s;adde&s;t one I ever met in return of the <HI>Noble&s;t</HI> and deare&s;t <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> was that of <HI>David</HI> towards <HI>Mephibo&s;heth.</HI> A <HI>Pick-thank</HI> malicious <HI>Informer,</HI> upon no colour of truth, accu&s;es him to <HI>David:</HI> He, without further examination, gives this informer <HI>Ziba</HI> his <HI>E&s;tate;</HI> and afterwards, though convinced of the <HI>Innocency</HI> of <HI>Mephibo&s;heth,</HI> would notwith&s;tanding onely re&s;tore him <HI>half</HI> his E&s;tate. <HI>Have I not &s;aid it</HI> (&s;ayes David) <HI>Thou and</HI> Ziba <HI>divide the land? Yea</HI> (&s;ayes Mephibo&s;heth) <HI>Let him take it all, &s;eeing my Lord the King is returned in peace.</HI> Surely <HI>Jonathans &s;onne</HI> de&s;erved better u|&s;age from <HI>David,</HI> if but for <HI>Jonathans</HI> &s;ake: and I am per&s;waded, if the Scales had been turn'd, <HI>Jonathan</HI> would not have u&s;ed a &s;onne of <HI>Davids</HI> &s;o: and therefore I &s;hall never que&s;tion which of them two <HI>loved be&s;t;</HI> no more then I &s;hall who <HI>wept most</HI> at their la&s;t <HI>parting,</HI> &s;ave that the <HI>Scripture</HI> is <HI>po&s;itive</HI> in this, that <HI>David</HI> exceeded, and <HI>Rea&s;on</HI> evinces that <HI>Jonathan</HI> did &s;o in the clearne&s;&s;e of his <HI>Friend|&s;hip.</HI></P>
<PB N="22" REF="15">
<P>On the other &s;ide, if we once conceive our &s;elves injured, and thereupon entertain high <HI>Animo&s;ities,</HI> we will take &s;peciall care to <HI>entail</HI> them, and mo&s;t commonly do it with that advantage, that <HI>our Po|&s;terity</HI> will pre&s;erve this more <HI>precious part</HI> of their <HI>Inheritance</HI> to go in <HI>Succe&s;sion,</HI> though they leave nothing el&s;e of their <HI>e&s;tate;</HI> as if like <HI>Mordecay's,</HI> an <HI>affront</HI> (and that po&s;sibly of our own <HI>making</HI> or <HI>in|terpretation)</HI> were <HI>irreparable</HI> without the <HI>extingui&s;h|ment</HI> not of the <HI>Per&s;on</HI> alone whence the <HI>Fire</HI> fir&s;t kindled, but the very <HI>Eradication</HI> of his <HI>Name</HI> and <HI>Race: So much apter are we</HI> through the <HI>Depravation</HI> of <HI>Nature</HI> and <HI>Morality,</HI> rather to <HI>revenge ill turns,</HI> then <HI>acknowledge good ones.</HI></P>
<P>Eminent examples of the&s;e <HI>hereditary Feuds</HI> there be in all <HI>Nations,</HI> e&s;pecially <HI>Forreigne;</HI> but &s;o few of reall and &s;olid friend&s;hip, that it will be the le&s;&s;e <HI>won|der</HI> to find <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> that have &s;pent many yeares in <HI>Travell,</HI> and among&s;t &s;uch as live rather by <HI>Rules of Policy</HI> then <HI>Hone&s;ty,</HI> (though that be the be&s;t) and &s;uch are the <HI>major part,</HI> &s;eldome (if ever) contract more then <HI>&s;uperficiall</HI> and <HI>formall Friend&s;hips:</HI> un|le&s;&s;e it be with &s;ome continued partner of his <HI>Travels,</HI> whom the <HI>Circum&s;tances</HI> of mutuall kindne&s;&s;es and <HI>uniting dangers,</HI> have firmly endeared and knit toge|ther; or except it was entred into before his <HI>flying a|broad,</HI>
<PB N="23" REF="15">and kept <HI>alive</HI> there by a <HI>continued corre&s;pon|dence.</HI></P>
<P>The two u&s;uall <HI>Re&s;idences</HI> of tho&s;e who do not &s;o much <HI>ride abroad,</HI> as <HI>inhabit,</HI> are <HI>France</HI> and <HI>Italy:</HI> in one of which the reigning <HI>Humour</HI> is <HI>Levity,</HI> in the other <HI>Jealou&s;ie;</HI> either of which po&s;&s;e&s;sing a <HI>Soul</HI> makes it <HI>inhabitable</HI> by a clear and &s;ublime <HI>Friend|&s;hip.</HI></P>
<P>Now &s;ome <HI>Fathers</HI> are &s;o <HI>over-politick,</HI> that <HI>though</HI> they <HI>know</HI> this, or rather, <HI>becau&s;e</HI> they know this, commend tho&s;e they de&s;igne for the <HI>Support</HI> of their <HI>Name</HI> to be <HI>Principled</HI> there, and are very glad to &s;ee them <HI>&s;uck</HI> in and <HI>hug</HI> dark and <HI>pernicious Axiomes</HI> of <HI>Di&s;simulation,</HI> and <HI>&s;acrificing</HI> all to <HI>Intere&s;t.</HI> They plea&s;e them&s;elves &s;trangely to find their hopefull Po|&s;terity count a <HI>Good-natur'd Man and a Fool the &s;ame thing under various expre&s;ssion;</HI> to &s;ay of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> as of <HI>Plain-dealing,</HI> that <HI>it is a Jewell, but who u&s;es it &s;hall die a Beggar.</HI> A number there are of <HI>Maximes</HI> to this effect, which whether borrowed from <HI>Ma|chiavil</HI> or <HI>Ignatius</HI> is not much <HI>materiall:</HI> but let not <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> hear the wor&s;e for the&s;e <HI>clamours,</HI> e&s;pecial|ly &s;ince the &s;ame <HI>Per&s;ons,</HI> and upon the &s;ame <HI>&s;lender account</HI> &s;ay the &s;elf-&s;ame things of <HI>Religion.</HI></P>
<P>But as no body ever &s;poke again&s;t <HI>Religion</HI> but they that had none, and therefore endeavour to con|fute
<PB N="24" REF="16">it by <HI>Votes</HI> rather then <HI>Arguments;</HI> &s;o 'tis of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> too. But while men &s;peak again&s;t what they under&s;tand not, the greate&s;t <HI>Non-plus</HI> they can put their <HI>Auditours</HI> to is, to re&s;olve whether the&s;e Detractours have more <HI>Ignorance</HI> or <HI>Impudence.</HI></P>
<P>A good wit that had lei&s;ure enough, might with|out Force extend the <HI>Parallell</HI> 'twixt <HI>Religion</HI> and <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> very farre. Certainly there is a very near re&s;emblance betwixt them: They grow and thrive be&s;t in the &s;ame &s;oil: They have the &s;ame <HI>Enemies;</HI> the &s;ame <HI>weeds</HI> choke them.</P>
<P>We make a ju&s;t account that <HI>all Vice is destructive of Friend&s;hip,</HI> for the <HI>Progre&s;sion</HI> of <HI>Vice</HI> is infinite, and the Multiplication like that of <HI>Hydra's heads,</HI> or the <HI>Covetous mans de&s;ires,</HI> they have no bound nor <HI>Damm;</HI> and therefore if we could allow &s;ome one <HI>Vice compatible</HI> with this <HI>&s;acred Amity,</HI> yet ere long that <HI>Vice</HI> would have got <HI>company,</HI> that <HI>Devil</HI> &s;even more, and they wor&s;e then him&s;elf: For even the <HI>De|vil</HI> loves not to be alone; and therefore the old <HI>Adage</HI> which &s;ayes the <HI>Solitary Man</HI> that loves to be alone <HI>is either a God or a Devil,</HI> is not to be literally &s;train'd, for it was never meant farther then to &s;hew &s;uch Per&s;ons are <HI>extraordinary,</HI> either <HI>good,</HI> or <HI>bad.</HI> And &s;o by this <HI>Catenation</HI> of <HI>Vices, &s;ome</HI> one <HI>link</HI> of the chain would be found confe&s;&s;edly too heavy for <HI>Friend|&s;hip</HI> to bear.</P>
<PB N="25" REF="16">
<P>I do not &s;ay a <HI>Friend</HI> mu&s;t not <HI>&s;in,</HI> much le&s;&s;e can|not; that were to confe&s;&s;e there could be no <HI>Friend|&s;hip</HI> here on <HI>Earth,</HI> for I am &s;ure there cannot be any <HI>Condition</HI> of man <HI>exempt</HI> from <HI>&s;in.</HI> But there is a va&s;t difference 'twixt a <HI>Sin</HI> and a <HI>Vice,</HI> at lea&s;t I would be under&s;tood &s;o now. <HI>Every going le&s;&s;e then our Du|ty is a Sin:</HI> but by <HI>Vice</HI> I intend <HI>&s;ome cho&s;en approved darling Habit</HI> of <HI>doing wickedly,</HI> which we <HI>indulge</HI> to our &s;elves. And this, let it be of what kind you plea&s;e, quite <HI>incapacitates</HI> the <HI>&s;oul</HI> for <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> be|cau&s;e it hath &s;eated this <HI>Vice</HI> in a higher Place and a dearer affection, then it re&s;erves for the Friend; and con&s;equently on a nece&s;sity of parting with one of the two, would &s;hake hands with the <HI>Friend</HI> and re|tain the <HI>Vice.</HI></P>
<P>'Twere extreamly tedious to run over all the <HI>Vi|ces,</HI> and &s;hew how they were particularly <HI>exclu&s;ory</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> &s;ince their <HI>Priority</HI> in our affection (if there were no other) is <HI>evidence</HI> enough. But let us ca&s;t our eyes upon <HI>two</HI> or <HI>three</HI> of them that have the <HI>milde&s;t Names,</HI> &amp; either for their <HI>Cu&s;tomarine&s;s</HI> in mo&s;t places, or <HI>Connaturalne&s;&s;e</HI> with many <HI>Tempers,</HI> &s;eem to claim a little more <HI>connivence</HI> or Indulgence; and when we have found the&s;e upon Triall to have no <HI>Right</HI> at all to <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> we conclude &s;afely again&s;t all others which have onely the &s;ame or (it may be) more <HI>weak Title.</HI></P>
<PB N="26" REF="17">
<P>I will in&s;tance in <HI>Lu&s;t</HI> or <HI>Wantonne&s;&s;e, Drunken|ne&s;&s;e,</HI> and <HI>Covetou&s;ne&s;&s;e;</HI> which their <HI>favourers</HI> call <HI>A Trick of youth, Good-fellow&s;hip,</HI> and <HI>Thrift.</HI></P>
<P>For the fir&s;t; Did not the &s;atisfying of <HI>Curius</HI> his <HI>Lust</HI> co&s;t him the lives of his deare&s;t and <HI>Sacrament|ally-combined Partners,</HI> while his pro&s;titute <HI>Fulvia</HI> &s;ucks from him the <HI>deep Secret</HI> of <HI>Catilines</HI> con&s;pira|cy? And after &s;o &s;olemn a <HI>Con&s;ignation</HI> of <HI>Secrecy</HI> 'twixt the <HI>Con&s;piratours,</HI> can we believe he that would expo&s;e them, would if they had been the mo&s;t dear Friends have been more continent? Nay did not <HI>Samp&s;on</HI> betray that <HI>Secret</HI> to <HI>Dalilah</HI> (after he had rea&s;on enough to gue&s;&s;e for what end &s;he was &s;o inqui&s;itive) that co&s;t him his life? and can we imagine, He that could not continue his own friend, &s;hould have conquered and with&s;tood the &s;ame <HI>Temptations</HI> for the <HI>Pre&s;ervation</HI> of another? And to leave examples, hath not the <HI>Apocrypha, (Canonicall enough in this particular)</HI> given us a large <HI>Mu&s;ter-Roll</HI> of the <HI>Forces</HI> of <HI>Women?</HI></P>
<P>For <HI>Drunkenne&s;&s;e</HI> (give it as good words as they plea&s;e) is it not a confe&s;&s;ed betrayer of <HI>Secrets,</HI> and con&s;equently of <HI>Friend&s;hip?</HI> Did not <HI>Alexander</HI> in his drink &s;tab one of mo&s;t e&s;teem with him? Drunkenne&s;&s;e does the &s;ame thing every day, it kills the <HI>Friend</HI> though not the <HI>Man,</HI> de&s;troyes the <HI>rela|tion</HI>
<PB N="27" REF="17">though not the <HI>Per&s;on:</HI> in a word, <HI>an habituall drunkard though he was once my Friend, cannot be &s;o when he is drunk, becau&s;e he is no longer him&s;elf.</HI></P>
<P>Thirdly, the <HI>Covetous</HI> man that makes money his <HI>God,</HI> will <HI>Sacrifice</HI> his deare&s;t friend <HI>Religiou&s;ly</HI> to it. Tell him he hath dealt <HI>di&s;honourably</HI> with his <HI>Friend, Hang honour</HI> (&s;ayes he) <HI>Give me twelve pence.</HI> Tell him he hath ba&s;ely &s;old his <HI>Friend,</HI> he will reply, <HI>I got five hundred pound by it,</HI> and <HI>would I could &s;ell all the friends I have at that Rate.</HI> The&s;e pithy <HI>Sen|tences</HI> are too <HI>true</HI> and <HI>Moderne.</HI> But what <HI>Fruits of Friend&s;hipp can be expected from the Root of all Evil?</HI></P>
<P>That <HI>Religion</HI> then and <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> have the &s;ame <HI>Enemies</HI> I take for granted, from the pa&s;t <HI>in&s;tances</HI> and <HI>genuine Con&s;equences</HI> of them; and &s;o have they the &s;ame <HI>Friends</HI> and <HI>Intere&s;ts;</HI> They are like <HI>Hip|pocrates Twins,</HI> they live and die together. I need not &s;tretch the <HI>Parallell</HI> any farther; This is more then enough to ju&s;tifie <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> again&s;t the loude&s;t <HI>Ca|lumny,</HI> and take off part of the wonder (if it be one) to find &s;o loud clamouring again&s;t <HI>that</HI> and <HI>Reli|gion.</HI></P>
<P>But to give a clear account why the be&s;t things are u&s;ed &s;o ill, we are to <HI>con&s;ider,</HI> That the greate&s;t part of the <HI>World</HI> are <HI>Strangers</HI> to <HI>Piety</HI> (not to &s;ay
<PB N="28" REF="18"><HI>Enemies</HI>) and con&s;equently to <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI> He that is an <HI>underminer</HI> of the <HI>Foundation</HI> mu&s;t of nece&s;sity <HI>ruine</HI> the <HI>Super&s;tructure.</HI> Now <HI>Religion</HI> is the be&s;t <HI>Groundwork</HI> and <HI>Foundation</HI> imaginable, whereupon to build a dear and mo&s;t firm <HI>Friend&s;hip:</HI> for <HI>how is it po&s;sible He &s;hould not be admirable in the love and en|dearing of his friends, who hath learn'd of a Ma&s;ter that hath taught him to love his enemies?</HI></P>
<P>But this is not all: 'Tis not the <HI>Open enemies</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> and <HI>Religion</HI> that have brought them into <HI>Que&s;tion</HI> and <HI>Contempt,</HI> but the <HI>pretended Profe&s;&s;ours,</HI> through who&s;e &s;ides they are wounded. It hath been the <HI>ill Logick</HI> of many ages, and <HI>we</HI> have had <HI>&s;ad Examples</HI> of it in this <HI>Nation,</HI> to transferre the <HI>Crimes</HI> of <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> upon the <HI>function, place, office,</HI> and <HI>calling;</HI> from hence it is that all the <HI>Accu&s;ations</HI> again&s;t <HI>Bi|&s;hops</HI> and <HI>Kings</HI> are urged to the abolition of <HI>Epi&s;co|pacy</HI> and <HI>Monarchy.</HI> Now though this be a very <HI>ir|rationall</HI> way of <HI>argument,</HI> yet when made u&s;e of a|gain&s;t <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> and <HI>Religion</HI> it is farre more <HI>ab&s;urd:</HI> For tho&s;e men upon who&s;e account <HI>Epi&s;copacy</HI> and <HI>Monarchy</HI> are condemned, are really <HI>Bi&s;hops</HI> and <HI>Kings;</HI> but they through who&s;e default <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> and <HI>Religion</HI> are calumniated, are neither <HI>Religious</HI> nor <HI>Friends,</HI> but onely <HI>Hypocriticall Pretenders.</HI></P>
<P>At the beginning of our <HI>Combu&s;tions</HI> here, when
<PB N="29" REF="18">the main <HI>Argument</HI> of all companies was the <HI>Law|fulne&s;&s;e</HI> or <HI>&V;nlawfulne&s;&s;e</HI> of <HI>rai&s;ing Arms against the King,</HI> I happened to be in company where a <HI>Graecian Patriarch of Con&s;tantinople</HI> urged &s;everely (as being moved with indignation at the example of <HI>Subjects</HI> taking Arms again&s;t their <HI>King</HI>) the <HI>Apology</HI> of <HI>Bi|&s;hop Jewel</HI> for the <HI>Church of England,</HI> wherein in the <HI>Name</HI> of the <HI>Church</HI> he teaches other <HI>Doctrine,</HI> which notwith&s;tanding this <HI>Forreigner</HI> could by no means be per&s;waded to credit as a received profe&s;&s;ed <HI>Pro|te&s;tant Doctrine,</HI> again&s;t &s;uch a <HI>Cloud of witne&s;&s;es</HI> as were in <HI>Arms</HI> again&s;t it. The onely an&s;wer a <HI>Pro|te&s;tant Divine</HI> gave him was, <HI>Tho&s;e you talk of in Arms are none of our Church, we di&s;claim them.</HI> Truely the &s;elf-&s;ame an&s;wer we may ju&s;tly give concerning them who&s;e <HI>Scandalous Cour&s;es be&s;patter</HI> things &s;o <HI>Sa|cred</HI> as <HI>Religion</HI> and <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI></P>
<P>'Tis high time, as I take it, to put an end now to this tedious&mdash;<HI>what &s;hall I call it?</HI> I have &s;cribled much more then I promi&s;ed, intended, or thought po&s;sible for me. You are too ingenious to object my promi&s;e of treating of the <HI>Benefits</HI> and <HI>&V;&s;es</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> as an <HI>obliging argument</HI> for my protracti|on of this, which mu&s;t have more then tired you ere now: for you cannot but have collected all I can hint on that account, from what is already pa&s;t your
<PB N="30" REF="19">view. I would not willingly come to repetition of them, &s;ince it mu&s;t of nece&s;sity be <HI>irksome to you,</HI> who&s;e own <HI>ob&s;ervation</HI> hath collected more particu|lars of that kind then I have or can expre&s;&s;e. But yet upon the &s;ame &s;core all this might have been &s;pared. For you want no <HI>knowledge</HI> of what <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is, nor any <HI>allurements</HI> to it. If I were to recapitulate all the <HI>Motives</HI> proper for per&s;wa&s;ion of tho&s;e who yet un|der&s;tand not what this <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is, I &s;hould be <HI>Vo|luminous.</HI> But yet &s;ince the <HI>De&s;igne</HI> it &s;elf of court|ing men into a good opinion of <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is in it &s;elf &s;o <HI>Noble,</HI> and people have &s;o <HI>awkward Imaginations</HI> of it, that all the art of the mo&s;t powerfull Pen is lit|tle enough to winne their attention, and reconcile them to their own true <HI>Intere&s;t, for Friend&s;hip is &s;o, when it is rightly under&s;tood;</HI> I will offer &s;omewhat as a <HI>Motive</HI> to our embracing it: which &s;hall not be any painting or <HI>artificiall Dre&s;&s;e,</HI> but its own <HI>Native Beauty and Lustre;</HI> which will appear be&s;t in the in|quiry into its U&s;e and Benefit, that being the touch|&s;tone which makes it pa&s;&s;e for currant or not.</P>
<P>The <HI>Benefits, Advantages,</HI> and <HI>Comforts</HI> that flow from <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> are as many, nay more then flow from <HI>Life it &s;elf. Life</HI> is a burthen to many for want of a <HI>Friend;</HI> but a <HI>Friend</HI> was never, <HI>never can</HI> be a <HI>Burthen</HI> to any, and <HI>who thinks otherwi&s;e</HI> never <HI>knew what Friend&s;hip was.</HI></P>
<PB N="31" REF="19">
<P>I had almo&s;t &s;aid a Man never <HI>lives, truely lives,</HI> till he has a <HI>Friend;</HI> and if I had, tho&s;e who are <HI>Friends</HI> would believe me, &s;o improved a way of li|ving is that of <HI>Friend&s;hip;</HI> tho&s;e who are not will, when they come to be &s;o happy.</P>
<P>Friend&s;hip does the &s;ame thing to the whole Man that the <HI>Rationall Soul</HI> does to the imperfect <HI>Embryo:</HI> as that addes a higher and more &s;ublime life to what had onely <HI>Vegetation</HI> and <HI>Sen&s;e</HI> before, &s;o does this to that.</P>
<P>There is not any <HI>Condition</HI> of our <HI>life</HI> that either does not receive, or at lea&s;t is not capable of recei|ving a va&s;t <HI>Support</HI> and <HI>Comfort</HI> from <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI> The &s;adde&s;t condition imaginable, when thy <HI>Pati|ence</HI> as well as <HI>Strength</HI> fails thee, and thy <HI>Grief</HI> car|ries a weight with it able to &s;ink thee to the <HI>Centre</HI> of the <HI>Earth,</HI> and <HI>cru&s;h</HI> thee to <HI>Nothing,</HI> may be &s;up|ported by the <HI>a&s;si&s;tant Arm</HI> of a <HI>Friend.</HI> And the <HI>be&s;t Condition</HI> thou can&s;t fancy to thy &s;elf here, un|le&s;&s;e thou ha&s;t friends, <HI>falls</HI> and <HI>dies</HI> and <HI>peri&s;hes</HI> in a moment. For thy <HI>Gladne&s;&s;e,</HI> like the <HI>Shunamites oile,</HI> encrea&s;es &s;till and never &s;tops, while thou ha&s;t a <HI>Ve&s;|&s;el,</HI> a <HI>Friend,</HI> to poure it into. And is not this more then enough to recommend <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> to us, to find it capable of <HI>abating our Grief,</HI> and <HI>increa&s;ing our Joy?</HI></P>
<PB N="32" REF="20">
<P>Nor does the common <HI>Objection</HI> again&s;t <HI>Friends,</HI> of <HI>di&s;parity of Condition,</HI> invalidate this <HI>Benefit</HI> of <HI>Friend&s;hip:</HI> For that wealth and imaginary Honour wherein &s;o many <HI>pride</HI> them&s;elves, are tran&s;itory, and may peri&s;h; a <HI>Friend</HI> cannot, and therefore is farre the more con&s;iderable Trea&s;ury: Nay the ve|ry <HI>wealth</HI> and <HI>honour</HI> it &s;elf is hardly pre&s;erved with|out a <HI>Friend.</HI> Now he that after that <HI>Pomp</HI> which made him deem all <HI>Per&s;ons</HI> below his <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> &s;hall fall into a <HI>Condition</HI> of <HI>Poverty</HI> as eminent in its kind as his <HI>former Splendour,</HI> and the more <HI>pointed</HI> at for that <HI>Splendour;</HI> hath nothing left in <HI>Art</HI> or <HI>Na|ture</HI> to make his <HI>Condition tolerable,</HI> and becomes in|&s;ufferably <HI>Ridiculous.</HI> Even his being humbled will ten to one be without either the <HI>plea&s;ure</HI> or rewards of <HI>Humility;</HI> for it is rare if it prove &s;o to &s;uch <HI>Spirits,</HI> &s;o much difference is there 'twixt being <HI>humble</HI> and <HI>humbled, Humility</HI> and <HI>Humiliation.</HI></P>
<P>I remember <HI>Ae&s;op</HI> tells us of an <HI>A&s;se,</HI> that being overburthen'd with his <HI>Ma&s;ters Carriage,</HI> de&s;ired a <HI>Hor&s;e,</HI> his fellow-&s;ervant and led <HI>leer</HI> by him, to ea&s;e him by bearing a Part: but the <HI>Hor&s;e</HI> was too <HI>proud,</HI> and &s;o <HI>refu&s;ed.</HI> What follows? The <HI>A&s;&s;e dies</HI> un|der the <HI>Oppre&s;sion,</HI> and &s;o the <HI>whole load devolves</HI> to the <HI>Hor&s;es back. The Fable moralizes it &s;elf. Ma|ny prepare heavy and in&s;upportable burthens for them|&s;elves
<PB N="33" REF="20">by being Bruti&s;h, un&s;ociable, and uncommuni|cative.</HI></P>
<P>I but (&s;ayes my <HI>politick Objectour</HI>) is this your <HI>Rhetorick</HI> and art of per&s;wa&s;ion towards <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> to make men carry <HI>Burthens?</HI> This is not to make us <HI>Friends,</HI> but <HI>Porters.</HI> I an&s;wer, it is farre other|wi&s;e: For had the <HI>Hor&s;e</HI> been the <HI>A&s;&s;es friend,</HI> he had proved his <HI>own</HI> too, and by <HI>parting</HI> the <HI>load</HI> made it <HI>none;</HI> For <HI>Burthens, like Rivers, divided loo&s;e their Name.</HI></P>
<P><HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> is very farre from being <HI>oppre&s;sive</HI> in a|ny of its <HI>Offices;</HI> for that cannot be a <HI>Burthen</HI> which is neither <HI>thought</HI> &s;o nor <HI>felt &s;o:</HI> and were it po&s;sible for me to receive one from my <HI>Friend,</HI> his <HI>Caution</HI> to pre&s;erve me from it would make my <HI>own</HI> needle&s;&s;e. I have known very <HI>ingenious arts</HI> practi&s;ed by <HI>Friends</HI> in conferring (on one part) and declining (on the other) <HI>Civilities,</HI> which the receiving hand hath imagined <HI>oppre&s;sive</HI> to the giving: But that is rare. Yet where a <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> doth grow &s;o <HI>bound|le&s;&s;e</HI> that it &s;hall be thought to want <HI>limits,</HI> tho&s;e <HI>li|mits</HI> mu&s;t be of thy <HI>Friends &s;etting,</HI> not thy <HI>own.</HI></P>
<P>I could (to &s;ave my &s;elf more pains) very con|tentedly believe I have by this time (taking what's &s;cattered in the former Pages into con&s;ideration, to|gether
<PB N="34" REF="21">with this la&s;t &s;upply) given <HI>con&s;iderations</HI> enough to render <HI>Friend&s;hip de&s;ireable,</HI> without the addition of any more. But one more will nece&s;&s;a|rily fall into our <HI>Examination,</HI> by a &s;hort inquiry in|to what may fit us for <HI>Friend&s;hip,</HI> as friend&s;hip is fit for us (unle&s;&s;e the fault be ours) and that is <HI>Reli|gion,</HI> the having or wanting whereof is the <HI>main Hinge</HI> upon which our <HI>Friend&s;hip is turn'd.</HI></P>
<P>All <HI>Souls</HI> are <HI>Equall;</HI> and unle&s;&s;e they have taken up ill &amp; contrary Principles either from ill <HI>Education,</HI> or an <HI>unlucky Temper</HI> and compo&s;ition of their re&s;pe|ctive <HI>Bodies,</HI> who&s;e <HI>Temperament</HI> they follow, &s;o would our <HI>Di&s;po&s;itions</HI> be too all <HI>Equall</HI> and very like. But let the <HI>A&s;similation</HI> hold in as many <HI>par|ticulars</HI> as you can <HI>fancy,</HI> if they differ in <HI>Piety</HI> (not in degrees, but the whole) there is a <HI>di&s;similitude ir|reconcileable</HI> by <HI>Friend&s;hip.</HI></P>
<P>I am told in <HI>Architecture</HI> that <HI>Lime</HI> and <HI>Timber</HI> are &s;o un&s;ociable, that the <HI>Beams</HI> of that <HI>Hou&s;e</HI> which are laid in <HI>Morter</HI> will be by it <HI>corroded</HI> and <HI>burnt</HI> up, to the de&s;truction of the <HI>Fabrick,</HI> and the wor&s;e this morter is <HI>temper'd</HI> the &s;ooner. Now a <HI>Man</HI> without <HI>Piety</HI> and <HI>Religion</HI> is this <HI>untemper'd Morter,</HI> and will certainly eat out <HI>the heart of that Friend&s;hip</HI> you thought firmly built upon him.</P>
<PB N="35" REF="21">
<P>If you de&s;ire therefore to have a <HI>Friend,</HI> learn fir&s;t to be <HI>Religious.</HI> 'Tis not any <HI>fanta&s;ticall imagina|ry Greatne&s;&s;e</HI> and di&s;proportion of Condition can make the inferiour <HI>Per&s;on</HI> u&s;ele&s;&s;e as a <HI>Friend:</HI> You have heard of the <HI>Lion</HI> in the <HI>Fable</HI> that was deli|vered from the <HI>Net</HI> and <HI>Death</HI> by the little <HI>Mou&s;e;</HI> and no man differs &s;o much from another; or if you can think they may, yet you have heard of a <HI>Poore Woman, who by her wi&s;edome delivered a great City from as great a danger.</HI> 'Tis onely the <HI>want of Religion,</HI> which makes either us incapable of others Friend|&s;hips, or them of ours: For this <HI>flatuous tumorous hu|mour</HI> which makes us <HI>too bigge</HI> to be <HI>gra&s;p'd</HI> by a <HI>Friend,</HI> and all other <HI>contrariant tempers</HI> to <HI>Friend&s;hip</HI> will be <HI>mortified</HI> by <HI>Religion.</HI></P>
<P>I mu&s;t not go on here, le&s;t I &s;end a <HI>Homily</HI> in&s;tead of a <HI>Letter.</HI> All I &s;hall adde is this; Let us all labour to get this nece&s;&s;ary <HI>Foundation, Cement,</HI> and <HI>All</HI> of <HI>Religion,</HI> and then we are not onely <HI>Excu&s;eable</HI> if we want <HI>Friends,</HI> but have this <HI>Comfort</HI> and <HI>Suppletory</HI> and <HI>Cordiall</HI> left us, when tho&s;e whom we cho&s;e for friends have through their own <HI>Vanity</HI> and <HI>Impiety</HI> for&s;aken us, that <HI>God is,</HI> and while we be <HI>Religious,</HI> will be <HI>our Friend.</HI></P>
<P>To that <HI>Almighty Friend,</HI> I recommend you, who
<PB N="36" REF="22">have a <HI>Soul</HI> &s;o exactly built up for an <HI>Eternall</HI> and <HI>Glorious Friend&s;hip,</HI> that I cannot want any of the happine&s;&s;es I have de&s;cribed here, and wi&s;h you (though the wi&s;h be needle&s;&s;e) eternally Parta|ker of, while I have the <HI>honour and advantage</HI> of being</P>
<CLOSER><DATE><HI>Octob.</HI> 30. 1653.</DATE>
<SIGNED>Your Friend <HI>(all Epithetes are needle&s;se and go le&s;&s;e)</HI> PALAEMON.</SIGNED></CLOSER>
<PB REF="22">
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