<!DOCTYPE ETS PUBLIC "-//UMDLPS//DTD EEBOPROOF 2.0//EN">
<ETS>
<TEMPHEAD>
<REVDESCR>
<CHANGE>
<DATE>2014-10-14</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>John Pas</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
</RESPSTMT>
<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch Z140410.apex.</ITEM>
</CHANGE>
</REVDESCR>
</TEMPHEAD>
<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="OX" ID="A87690">
<STC T="W">K324</STC>
<STC T="T">E446_21</STC>
<STC T="C">R202624</STC>
<BIBNO T="umi">99862849</BIBNO>
<VID>161785</VID>
</IDG>
<TEXT LANG="eng">
<FRONT>
<DIV1 TYPE="title page">
<PB REF="1" MS="y">
<P>THE KENTISH FAYRE&punc; OR, The Parliament &s;old to their be&s;t worth.</P>
<Q><LG>
<L>Good <HI>Oliver,</HI> lend me thy no&s;e</L>
<L>'Tis darke, all lights are out:</L>
<L>For now I meane to write in pro&s;e,</L>
<L>But guided, by thy &s;nout.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Black <HI>Tom</HI> already's at the <HI>Faire,</HI></L>
<L>And in his Coach is carried:</L>
<L>His men, mean-while blowne in the <HI>Ayre,</HI></L>
<L>And to the Friends, are married.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Some <HI>Citizens,</HI> they &s;ay will ride,</L>
<L>To buy Knacks for their <HI>Wives:</HI></L>
<L>Let <HI>Skippon,</HI> Skipp-on, as their Guid,</L>
<L>He may protect their lives.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>At <HI>Rochester,</HI> the Faire is held,</L>
<L>By all good tokens, know it:</L>
<L>A thou&s;and <HI>Saints,</HI> late, there were feld</L>
<L>As yet the Bridge, can &s;how it.</L>
</LG></Q>
<P>Printed at <HI>Roche&s;ter,</HI> and are to be &s;old, to all tho&s;e that dare buy them. 1648.</P>
</DIV1>
</FRONT>
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="play">
<PB N="2" REF="2">
<HEAD>THE KENTISH FAYRE: OR, THE PARLIAMENT SOLD TO THEIR WORTH.</HEAD>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>The Cryer.</SPEAKER>
<P>O yes, &ocirc; yes, &ocirc; yes; All manner of Per&s;ons.</P>
<LG>
<L>KNow our most gracious godly Parliament</L>
<L>Is &s;et to &s;ale at <HI>Roche&s;ter</HI> in <HI>Kent:</HI></L>
<L>All tho&s;e who have a mind to buy, repaire</L>
<L>Thither, and they may have their Choice of ware.</L>
<L>A Faire is kept there, there to &s;ale is &s;et</L>
<L>The Mi&s;chiefes did at fir&s;t, the Warre beget:</L>
<L>There you may Buy, pretended fal&s;e Religion,</L>
<L>Iealou&s;ies, feares, fal&s;e-hearted, and Mi&s;pri&s;ion.</L>
<L>The cur&s;ed Plot, to take off <HI>STRAFFORD</HI>'s head,</L>
<L>And to &s;end <HI>Canterbury</HI> to the Dead:</L>
<L>To drive the <HI>King</HI> away, to carry on</L>
<L>A mo&s;t unheard of vile Rebellion.</L>
<L>To Pri&s;on him, debarre him of his Wife:</L>
<L>And la&s;tly, to bereave him of his Life.</L>
<L>Here now the Rebels reigne is at an end,</L>
<L>You may by them, and what they did Intend.</L>
</LG>
</SP>
<STAGE>Two Knights in di&s;guize, or Sir <HI>Tho: Palmer,</HI> and Sir <HI>Tho: Peyton.</HI></STAGE>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>1. <HI>Ped:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>How doe I &s;how in this habit.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>2. <HI>Ped:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Like a perfect <HI>Canter,</HI> and with as &s;allow a Coun|tenance,
<PB N="3" REF="2"> as if thou had&s;t borne a Pack and laine in &s;traw this &s;eaven yeares.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>1. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>I like that well, thou art as perfectly Metamorpho|&s;ed as my &s;elfe; in the&s;e habits we may &s;ecurely travaile, we mu&s;t pa&s;&s;e through all hazards for our King, how &s;trong are the <HI>Kenti&s;h-men?</HI></P>
<P>Full &s;ixteene thou&s;and Sir, in Hor&s;e and Foot, they doe in|crea&s;e their numbers every day, the Apprentices of <HI>London</HI> flock unto them.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>2. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>If <HI>Kent</HI> that ne're was Conquer'd, now hold our &s;tifly for the King, and conquer Trea&s;on and Rebellion, the latter Conque&s;t will exceed their former Policie.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>1. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Eight of His Maje&s;ties Ships, have willingly &s;ub|mitted to their power, the re&s;t is thought wil come in &s;hortly; <HI>Rainsborough</HI> the Vice-Admirall is turn'd on &s;hore, his teares and prayers &s;aved his life, el&s;e they had ca&s;t him over-bord.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>2. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>To &s;ee when as Rebellion was at highe&s;t, and Trea|&s;on gra&s;pt a Scepter, how &s;oone the fickle Lady, turn'd her Wheele, now all things are rever&s;t, mi&s;eries now threaten the Rebels from all quarters; behold brave <HI>Poyer,</HI> the fir&s;t that &s;hewed him&s;elfe for his King and Country, now bravely de|fending <HI>Pembroke</HI> Ca&s;tle, having beaten <HI>Flemming,</HI> and <HI>Hor|ton,</HI> yea <HI>Oliver</HI> him&s;elfe, and now remaineth in a gallant po|&s;ture, with a &s;trong Army in the field; &s;ee where the hardy <HI>Scots</HI> are comming dancing a Martiall mea&s;ure, after their Drums and Bag-pipes; &s;ee where Sir <HI>Marmaduke Langdale</HI> in the North, having fortified <HI>Barwick,</HI> now is &s;cowring the Country, having an Army of 7000 Men, with whom joynes Sir <HI>Thomas Glemham,</HI> that able and incomparable Comman|der, who hath ceaz'd on <HI>Carlile,</HI> and fortified it for the King: See where the mo&s;t renowned men of <HI>Kent,</HI> are in huge Bo|dies joyn'd, have lately given the Arch-Rebell <HI>Fairfax</HI> a great overthrow neare <HI>Roche&s;ter,</HI> have kill'd a thou&s;and on the place, have taken divers, di&s;pier&s;ed his whole Army, him&s;elfe e&s;ca|ping hardly; <HI>E&s;&s;ex, Surrey,</HI> and <HI>Cornwall,</HI> now putting them|&s;elves into a Military po&s;ture. Ha, who are the&s;e, what Wo|men weare Armes.</P>
</SP>
<PB N="5" REF="3">
<STAGE>Mrs. <HI>Web&s;ter,</HI> and Mrs. <HI>Maine,</HI> with Pi&s;tols and Swords.</STAGE>
<STAGE>They Sing.<NOTE PLACE="marg">Mrs. <HI>Web|&s;ter</HI> and Mi|&s;tris <HI>Maine,</HI> two Women y^t are now in Armes in <HI><GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1+ letters">ent.</HI></NOTE></STAGE>
<FLOATEXT LANG="eng" TYPE="song">
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. Web.</SPEAKER>
<LG>
<L>MEn tardy growne, and deaf to good,</L>
<L>remi&s;&s;e in every thing:</L>
<L>Their owne great woes, not under&s;tood</L>
<L>them&s;elves &s;lav'd, and their King.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>'Tis time that Women armour weare,</L>
<L>and teach Men for to fight:</L>
<L>'Gain&s;t tho&s;e, who their de&s;truction &s;weare,</L>
<L>and &s;eeke it, day and night.</L>
</LG>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. Maine.</SPEAKER>
<LG>
<L>Wee two like <HI>Amazons</HI> of old,</L>
<L>who fought for wretched <HI>Troy:</HI></L>
<L>Have vow'd, to Kill all tho&s;e that would,</L>
<L>per&s;i&s;t us to anoy.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Come <HI>Fairfax,</HI> thee I long to Charge</L>
<L>at head of all thy Men:</L>
<L>And &s;end thee maimed in a Barge</L>
<L>to <HI>London</HI> back agen.</L>
</LG>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. Web.</SPEAKER>
<LG>
<L><HI>No<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1 letter"> Cromwell,</HI> though thou bath'&s;t in flames,</L>
<L>yet know thou Salamander:</L>
<L>That thou &s;halt tremble at our Names,</L>
<L>and wee &s;hall &s;end you yonder.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Come all yee <HI>Sectaries</HI> that dwell</L>
<L>within the cur&s;ed Citie:</L>
<L>And wee will &s;end you unto Hell,</L>
<L>unto the black Committee.</L>
</LG>
</SP>
</FLOATEXT>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>1. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Well met warlike Women, how many are there of your County, that walke in your equipage?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Web.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Many <HI>Pedlar,</HI> whither art thou Sirrah and thy fellow going.</P>
</SP>
<PB N="5" REF="3">
<SP>
<SPEAKER>2. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Going woman, why to the Faire.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Ma.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Who are you for.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>1. <HI>Ped.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>For our Cu&s;tomers.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Web.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>God and his Angels? Why this is Sir <HI>Tho: Pal|mer;</HI> pardon us good Sir, we did not know you.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Ma.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>And this is Sir <HI>Tho: Peyton</HI> mo&s;t noble Knights pardon our bold pre&s;umption, as you were <HI>Pedlars</HI> wee had power to taxe you, as you are <HI>Knights,</HI> we &s;erve you.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Thankes to you both <HI>Viraga's,</HI> what men of note have you now at the Faire, who lead the re&s;t a <HI>Cinque-pace,</HI> un|to the martiall murmur of the Drum.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Web.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Sir, we have the&s;e, Sir <HI>Robert Tracy,</HI> Sir <HI>Gamali|el Dudley,</HI> Sir <HI>Iohn Many,</HI> Sir <HI>Tho: Godfrey:</HI> Sir <HI>Iames Hales,</HI> Sir <HI>Wil: Many,</HI> Sir <HI>Iohn Dorell,</HI> Sir <HI>Richara Hardre&s;&s;e,</HI> Colonel <HI>Wa&s;hington,</HI> Col. <HI>Le'&s;trange,</HI> Col. <HI>Hacker,</HI> Col <HI>Culpepper,</HI> and many other E&s;quires and Gentlemen, of knowne valour and integrity.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pey:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>What new commodities doth this Faire afford, have yee any up&s;tart Gentlemen to &s;ell for Slaves, Parliament men to &s;ell for knaves, Committee-men to di&s;po&s;e of for the galleys, and Excize-men for the gallowes, have yee any Citi|zens that will make pimpes, and Common-Coun&s;ell-men that weare the Cuckolds armes.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Ma:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Sir, wee have the&s;e, and all their Implements, here's the rich Pedlare&s;&s;e Mrs. <HI>Fame,</HI> will afford you choice for your money.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Mrs. <HI>Fame.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>What doe you lack or buy Gent: any Votes, Orders, or Declarations, any Plots, Covenants, or Prote&s;tati|ons, will you buy an Ordinance of Indempnity, perchance one of you may be a Rebell or a Parliament man, will you plea&s;e to buy a new Ordinance for putting Malignants out of the Ci|ty of <HI>London,</HI> and the late lines of Communication; &s;ee what you want Gentlemen, &s;ee what you want.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Ha&s;t thou ere an up&s;tart Gentleman to &s;ell, one that hath formerly &s;at cro&s;&s;e-leg'd on a Shop-bord, hath been a Broom-man, or a Kennell-raker a Dray-man, or a Porter,
<PB N="6" REF="4"> and now doth rant it and imitateth the Gentile&s;t garb, and loves to Complement.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Sir, I have choice of tho&s;e, I have Col. <HI>Pride, Player.</HI> and others, but if you'l have a Prince and void of &s;hame, take this man for your u&s;e, his name is <HI>Bark-&s;tead,</HI> the proud Thim|ble-maker, who walkes the round each night at <HI>We&s;tmin&s;ter,</HI> a Fool in folio yet a mighty Talker, who&s;e Complements are tane from <HI>Martin Parker;</HI> yet fit him with a Whore that plea|&s;es him, and you &s;hall heare him wa&s;t his lungs in prai&s;e of her, untill he need &s;ome <HI>Aqua-vita,</HI> take this man on my cre|dit Sir.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Ha&s;t thou ere a Parliament man a knave, I have &s;ome u&s;e of one.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>I have a hundred Sir, why they abound Sir, I can afford you twenty at cheape rate, buy the&s;e halfe dozen of me they are tran&s;cendent knaves Sir ile a&s;&s;ure, or ne're buy of me more.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Where be they?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Here Sir, there's <HI>Harry Martin,</HI> there's <HI>Weaver</HI> (who pronounced openly to the re&s;t of his fellowes, That it was fit the King &s;hould be brought to his tryall, and hang'd, drawne and quartered, rather then Treated with, Hee being the only cau&s;e of all the Blood-&s;hed throughout the three <HI>Kingdomes,)</HI> I have &s;et a &s;peciall mark upon this man Sir, and it is a <HI>T,</HI> and an <HI>R;</HI> the third, is <HI>Scot;</HI> the fourth, <HI>Vane;</HI> the fifth, <HI>Mild|may;</HI> and the &s;ixt <HI>Manche&s;ter,</HI> the wild Boare who hath roo|ted up two famous Univer&s;ities, and deadly wounded Lear|ning and Learned men, there they be Sir.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>The&s;e Ile re&s;erve for Hawkes-meat, they will &s;ave me the charges of Buying, and my men the trouble of procuring Hor&s;es and Dogs-fle&s;h, ha&s;t thou ever a Capritious Committee-man, to di&s;po&s;e of to the Galleys.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>O many Sir, three that will fit you to a haire.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Let me &s;ee them, what are their names?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Here's <HI>Challoner</HI> the Athie&s;t, <HI>Corbet</HI> the Cuckold, and <HI>Fouke</HI> the Fool.</P>
</SP>
<PB N="7" REF="4">
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>The&s;e, the&s;e will &s;erve my turn excellently well, <HI>Challoner</HI> would make a good Devine among&s;t the <HI>Indians, Corbet</HI> I will &s;ell to the great <HI>Turke,</HI> hee may have u&s;e for him in his <HI>Seraglio,</HI> and <HI>Fouke</HI> I will re&s;erve for my &s;elfe, and will provide him a Coat and a Cap, hee &s;hall be my Ie&s;ter; ha&s;t thou ere an Excize-man to di&s;po&s;e to the gallowes, for an ex|ample to the re&s;t?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Yes Sir, here's <HI>Wilkins</HI> the Excize-man, I dare put him into your hands, for a Villaine worth hanging.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Bind his hands behind him, hee is ordained for death, and &s;hall bee hang'd on a Gibbet erected on purpo&s;e; ha&s;t thou ere a Citizen that would make a Pimpe, a clo&s;e and tru&s;ty Pimpe?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>O Sir yes, I have one will fit your turne ile warrant you, here's one Sir that was Pimpe to his owne Wife, for a yearly &s;tipend, his name is <HI>R. D.</HI> take him Sir upon my word, hee will hold the doore with any man of his inches a|bout <HI>London.</HI></P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Ha&s;t thou ere a Common-Coun&s;ell-man, that weares branchers, and can derive the Pedigree of Cuckolds from <HI>Adams</HI> time to this day, who weares his branch in try|umph, and takes a Pride to heare men prai&s;e his hornes?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Sir, I can fit you to a Cowes-thumb, would you have an Alderman, a Militia man, or a Common-Coun&s;ell man.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>I told thee before, a Common-Coun&s;ell man.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Here then Sir, take this man with the Gold-chaine, perhaps you have heard, how he defil'd his Breeches, but that's nothing Sir, he is well read in the Science of Cuckoldry.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Pal:</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>I like him well, what ha&s;t thou el&s;e worthy my money?</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Fame.</SPEAKER>
<P>Here's a mad Order Sir, lately put forth by the Re|bels, which &s;aith, that the Lives and Lands of the&s;e that keepe the <HI>Faire</HI> in <HI>Kent,</HI> &s;hall be lawfull prize to the Souldiery, and further commands, <HI>That no quarter bee given either to Man, Woman, or Child.</HI></P>
</SP>
<PB N="8" REF="5">
<SP>
<SPEAKER>Sir <HI>T. Peyton.</HI></SPEAKER>
<P>Sai&s;t thou &s;o <HI>Fame,</HI> their Order wee'l make good upon them&s;elves, and cru&s;h their &s;oules out with our y|ron hands, have they &s;at &s;eaven yeares to marre our Govern|ment, and would they now ceaze on our Lives and States; thinke they for to build high upon our ruines, know <HI>Fame,</HI> and eccho it throughout the world, <HI>Kent</HI> will bee loyall to their King, &s;hould all the Kingdome el&s;e prove wicked, al|though wee are not fearfull to find ayd, <HI>Surrey, E&s;&s;ex,</HI> and <HI>Cornwall,</HI> have promi&s;ed to come in, to our a&s;&s;i&s;tance.</P>
</SP>
<SP>
<LG>
<L>Then let the Rebels, and their <HI>Fairfax</HI> know,</L>
<L>That they mu&s;t fall, for Fate will have it &s;o:</L>
<L>Wee have begun to rout them, nor will cea&s;e,</L>
<L>Till with their cur&s;ed Liv<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="OXF" EXTENT="1+ letters">, wee buy our Peace.</L>
<L>Great <HI>CHARLES</HI> looke up, for now redemption comes,</L>
<L><HI>Peace</HI> &s;peaketh, in the language of our Drums,</L>
<L>By <HI>Blood</HI> they hold their power, by <HI>Blood</HI> mu&s;t wee</L>
<L>Re&s;tore our <HI>King,</HI> unto his Soveraigntie:</L>
<L>Our &s;elves unto our Rights, which wee have lo&s;t,</L>
<L>By tru&s;ting &s;eeming Friends, who hate us mo&s;t.</L>
<L>Sound Drums and Trumpets, let the Kingdome heare,</L>
<L>The Rebels mu&s;t not Reigne, another yeare.</L>
</LG>
</SP>
<TRAILER>FINIS.</TRAILER>
</DIV1>
</BODY>
</TEXT>
</EEBO>
</ETS>
