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<DATE>2008-04-10</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>Elspeth Healey</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
</RESPSTMT>
<ITEM>Proofed text and corrected markup.</ITEM>
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<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="UM" ID="B06597">
<STC T="W">W2173B</STC>
<BIBNO T="umi">99887010</BIBNO>
<VID>181704</VID>
</IDG>
<TEXT>
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="poem">
<PB REF="1" MS="y">
<HEAD>Doctor COOPER at Work Upon <HI>DAUNCEY'S</HI> Bones: AND COOK licking his FINGERS After his <HI>Do&s;e</HI> and <HI>Pill.</HI></HEAD>
<LG>
<L>O For the <HI>Doctor's lines,</HI> or <HI>Cleveland's, Dauncey</HI></L>
<L>To tru&s;s thee in, how bravely would I haun&s;e thee,</L>
<L>Then like a Jack o' <HI>Lent</HI> the fir&s;t of <HI>March,</HI></L>
<L>In <HI>Cuerpo</HI> thou &s;hould'&s;t hang under &s;ome <HI>Arch,</HI></L>
<L>There to be play'd on by the wind, and noi&s;e</L>
<L>Of <HI>Fi&s;h-wives, Orange-wenches,</HI> and the <HI>Boyes.</HI></L>
<L>Was't not enough the brethren felt his whip</L>
<L>So &s;mart and keen, but he mu&s;t make thee skip</L>
<L>Thou Jackanapes? think'&s;t thou, thou piteous elf,</L>
<L>To draw his anger on thy &s;ingle &s;elf,</L>
<L>And re&s;cue &s;o a number? foul-mouth no,</L>
<L>You are beneath him, hee's more worth than &s;o.</L>
<L>Lord, what a holy thing is want of clothes.</L>
<L>How it keeps <HI>Balladers</HI> from drink and oaths!</L>
<L>When there's no more to pawn, an oath were vain,</L>
<L>Your words will go as far in <HI>Chart'r 'ou&s;e</HI> lane.</L>
<L>Thou &s;eem'&s;t boy to have taken his advice</L>
<L>And gone to &s;chool agen, and thou art wi&s;e</L>
<L>In doing &s;o, thou may'&s;t be of his &s;tables,</L>
<L>Th'art at the Dunghill now in <HI>AE&s;op's Fables.</HI></L>
<L>Your mine's Hell deep, we give a gue&s;&s;e what's in't,</L>
<L>Poets w'are &s;ure &s;end nothing to the mint.</L>
<L>W'are pleas'd to &s;ee you wince, y'ave a gauld hide,</L>
<L>Your own breath &s;tinks when 'tis to you apply'd.</L>
<L>If your own words refounded be accur&s;t,</L>
<L>Your meaning was not whol&s;ome at the fir&s;t.</L>
<L>Mark how this &s;aucy <HI>Ra&s;cal</HI> 'gins his prate,</L>
<L>As though the Doctour were an advocate</L>
<L>OF foul debauchery: when in no mans hearing</L>
<L>He ever &s;poke of drunkenne&s;&s;e or &s;wearing;</L>
<L>Nor thinks there can be &s;uch a &s;in in fa&s;hion</L>
<L>I'th Clergy, 'ts hatch'd in your Imagination:</L>
<L>There 'tis ye &s;landerous villains that ye frame</L>
<L>An odious abu&s;e, and then declame.</L>
<L>So I have &s;een a Coward draw his &s;word</L>
<L>Again&s;t a Po&s;t, and every blow a word;</L>
<L>Now if thou wer't a man, <HI>I</HI>'de have thee here,</L>
<L>And then again he cryes I'de have thee there.</L>
<L>Bring forth your <HI>&s;wearers,</HI> and your <HI>drunkards</HI> too,</L>
<L>Or on my word this Knight o'th po&s;t are you.</L>
<L>I a've a <HI>Phy&s;ician</HI> that without perhaps</L>
<L>Shall cure your mouth &s;ecure of <HI>after claps.</HI></L>
<L>Down o' your knees, thank God, and thank me too,</L>
<L>'Tis well, 'tis well, now <HI>Gallows</HI> claim thy due;</L>
<L>And when the Surgeons che&s;t has brought you &s;ir</L>
<L>Back from that tree, into their Theatre,</L>
<L>The Doctor for a Lecture &s;hall not &s;tick,</L>
<L>To &s;end your bones unto the Devil to pick.</L>
<L>You might have &s;een, had you been &s;o inclin'd,</L>
<L>(But as the &s;aying is, <HI>ha&s;ty Currs are blind</HI>)</L>
<L>The <HI>Doctor</HI> knew your <HI>A&s;&s;e's</HI> meaning &s;ir,</L>
<L>And needs not you for an Interpreter.</L>
<L>We like no coxeing friend, nor ever will,</L>
<L><HI>Joab</HI> and <HI>Judas</HI> both did ki&s;&s;e and kill.</L>
<L>Had <HI>Griffin</HI> bray'd again&s;t a man or two,</L>
<L>Or on a County where &s;uch things they do,</L>
<L>His Libel might have gone untax'd: but now</L>
<L>To write at randome thus, and to allow</L>
<L>A roving Kite with full &s;pread wings to fly</L>
<L>Over the Nation, carrying infamy</L>
<L>Thus undetermin'd; <HI>Dauncey</HI> 'tis too much,</L>
<L>Ill minds conclude the <HI>Clergy</HI> all are &s;uch.</L>
<L>This mi&s;chief he has done, and as we mention,</L>
<L>We had but's own word for his good intention.</L>
<L>This has your pious &s;oul done, that can't drink</L>
<L>Yon &s;ay, but &s;hall <HI>I</HI> tell you what <HI>I</HI> think?</L>
<L>What <HI>I</HI> have heard? <HI>Danncey</HI> I will take leave,</L>
<L>For all your <HI>affidavit,</HI> t'undeceive</L>
<L>My &s;illy Countrymen, who live in doubt</L>
<L>Some Mini&s;ter of worth &s;et this Cry out;</L>
<L>Who&s;e &s;pirit bleeds within him for the &s;in</L>
<L>That yet the people, and the Clergy's in.</L>
<L>But come chear up my hearts, 'tis no &s;uch matter,</L>
<L>This fellow in Divinity does but &s;matter,</L>
<L>Hangs on the <HI>Pre&s;&s;e,</HI> and as his learning's &s;mall,</L>
<L>His pay's ten groats a ballad, and &s;ome Ale:</L>
<L>Which not one Stationer alone does pay for</L>
<L>But all the Crowd, which he goes fir&s;t to &s;tay for;</L>
<L>The Common &s;punge, a fellow of no reck'ning,</L>
<L>Shall follow you to an Alehou&s;e but for beck'ning.</L>
<L>And be brought out agen perhaps. But How!</L>
<L>What do I &s;ee, <HI>Dauncey,</HI> the grizly brow</L>
<L>Of Goblin <HI>Truth,</HI> Fathers in <HI>Truth,</HI> the thing</L>
<L>Undid the Church, and cut the throat o'th King?</L>
<L>Choak us no more you R&mdash;with your minc'd meat,</L>
<L><HI>Fathers,</HI> feed's at di&s;cretion, we will eat,</L>
<L>I and give thanks too for your in&s;titution,</L>
<L>And call you fathers without diminution,</L>
<L>Con&s;ervers of Gods Oracles, bring the&s;e fellows</L>
<L>Truth to confe&s;&s;e, where they &s;hould do't to'th Gallows.</L>
<L>And mark it <HI>Dauncey,</HI> &s;ee how thou art catch'd,</L>
<L>As if thine own lye to betray th'ad&s;t watch'd;</L>
<L>When with compari&s;on thou would'&s;t up-cry</L>
<L>The faith of <HI>Griffin,</HI> As hath no reply.</L>
<L>But Mr. <HI>Dauncey,</HI> now y'ave &s;hew'd your lack</L>
<L>Of wit and art, let me again go back,</L>
<L>And view the &s;ubject of your declamation</L>
<L><HI>Not again&s;t things, but vices</HI> O this Nation.</L>
<L>Are vices nothing? and's all this ado</L>
<L>Made about nothing, by you Puppies two.</L>
<L>Now you begin to belch up your di&s;grace,</L>
<L>And &s;pit foul Language in the <HI>Doctor's</HI> face;</L>
<L>VVhat are you proud of, that you thus <HI>be-A&s;&s;e us,</HI></L>
<L>And knave us bluntly, is't Land in <HI>Parna&s;&s;us</HI>?</L>
<L>Who would not &s;wear you'r drunk? it is no ruth</L>
<L>To con&s;cience for a man to &s;wear the Truth.</L>
<L>Would'&s;t thou know what thou art? thou can&s;t not mi&s;s't,</L>
<L>In the fir&s;t Chapter of the <HI>Alchymi&s;t,</HI></L>
<L>Where <HI>Sub<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="UOM" EXTENT="1 letter">l, Doll,</HI> and <HI>Face</HI> do &s;eem to me</L>
<L>Rayling, to conjure for a name for thee.</L>
<L>There read thy &s;elf, th'are thine all, and if't be</L>
<L>Thy chance to &s;cape a &s;adder de&s;tiny,</L>
<L>VVhen with the <HI>Stationers</HI> thou ha&s;t &s;uck'd &s;o long</L>
<L>Scot-free of Ale, as t'other has, who&s;e tongue</L>
<L>Thou now defende&s;t, may&s;t thou by good prayers</L>
<L>Ri&s;e by degrees, from Link-boy, to the Players;</L>
<L>To be their book-keeper, and then grown bold,</L>
<L>Upon thy parts, when thou art blind and old,</L>
<L>Pre&s;ume to write a play in thy la&s;t age,</L>
<L>And have it ba&s;ely hi&s;s'd off o' the &s;tage,</L>
<L>For which thy heart mu&s;t break, if it break not</L>
<L>This minute, for thus having play'd the Sot.</L>
<L>We are ingenuous, and do not deride</L>
<L>Your poverty, you Knaves, no, but your pride;</L>
<L>And cannot choo&s;e but laugh, to &s;ee the Saints</L>
<L>Have drunken Athei&s;ts to defend their plaints.</L>
<L>So <HI>exit Dauncey.</HI> &mdash; Now comes <HI>Cook</HI> in fury,</L>
<L>Lick-&s;pit o'th Law: &s;peak &s;irrah to the Jury,</L>
<L>There you may find a dozen of the name</L>
<L>You give the Doctor, (Caterpillar of fame:)</L>
<L>Beat me this Buckram Rogue, <HI>Fal&s;taffe,</HI> to &s;even.</L>
<L>Nay if thou wilt, beat him into eleven,</L>
<L>And if they have no better manners then,</L>
<L>Send them to me, I'le beat them all agen.</L>
<L>Knaves that do nought but quirk upon his Calling,</L>
<L>And quit their cau&s;e; 'tis time the A&s;&s;e left bawling.</L>
</LG>
<Q><BIBL><HI>Martial.</HI> Ep.</BIBL> <HI>Dic tandem aliquid de tribus Capellis.</HI></Q>
</DIV1>
</BODY>
<BACK>
<DIV1 TYPE="postscript">
<LG>
<L>I Thought I'ad fini&s;h'd <HI>William</HI> now, but hark,</L>
<L>I'ave commendations to thee from the Clark,</L>
<L>Fogg in Rye dough, thou image of a Lawyer,</L>
<L>Fitter to make a Carman, or a Sawyer,</L>
<L>Much more then ord'nary appears in you.</L>
<L>Plead you for A&s;&s;es, and are A&s;&s;es too?</L>
<L>Mu&s;t Readers preach; has the Church no degrees,</L>
<L>Nor order? <HI>Scribes</HI> go take the Lawyers fees.</L>
<L>Hell's where confu&s;ion is, and rotten &s;peech,</L>
<L>The Lawyer took's own pill, and &s;poke at's breech.</L>
<L>The journey-pew &s;upplyes his need, as 'tis,</L>
<L>Pray, get your A&s;&s;e a pulpit to &s;erve his.</L>
<L>He will not be the fir&s;t A&s;&s;e that e're &s;poke</L>
<L>Out of one, and got by't a &s;uit and cloak.</L>
<L>I wi&s;h thy libel might have pleas'd where't came,</L>
<L>And that thou'd&s;t had a more au&s;picious name</L>
<L>At <HI>We&s;tmin&s;ter Hall</HI> Gate, hee'l &s;ee that looks,</L>
<L>VVhat's to be thought of di&s;affected <HI>Cooks.</HI></L>
<L>God ble&s;&s;e King <HI>Charles,</HI> &s;o that he ne'er agen</L>
<L>Be troubled with &s;uch <HI>Rogues,</HI> &s;peak Clark, Amen.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Now &s;troake the <HI>Doctor</HI>'s beard, ye Libel flingers;</L>
<L>And if ye foule your hands, <HI>Cooke</HI> lick your fingers.</L>
</LG>
<CLOSER><SIGNED>By <HI>Nat. Wildoe.</HI></SIGNED></CLOSER>
</DIV1>
<DIV1 TYPE="colophon">
<P><HI>LONDON,</HI> Printed for the Author, 1661.</P>
</DIV1>
</BACK>
</TEXT>
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