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<DATE>2009-01-04</DATE>
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<NAME>Emma Leeson Huber</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
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<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch Z080713.pdcc.</ITEM>
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<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="OX" ID="B02251">
<STC T="W">C4886</STC>
<BIBNO T="umi">99887004</BIBNO>
<VID>181696</VID>
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<TEXT LANG="eng">
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<DIV1 TYPE="text">
<PB REF="1" MS="y"><!-- PDF PAGE 12 -->
<HEAD>THE COFFEE HOUSE OR NEWS-MONGERS HALL.</HEAD>
<ARGUMENT>
<L>In which is &s;hewn their &s;everal &s;orts of Pa&s;&s;ions, </L>
<L>Containing News from all our Neighbour <HI>Nations.</HI></L>
</ARGUMENT>
<HEAD>A POEM.</HEAD>
<LG>
<L>YOu that delight in Wit and Mirth,</L>
<L>And long to hear &s;uch News,</L>
<L>As comes from all Parts of the <HI>Earth,</HI></L>
<L><HI>Dutch, Danes,</HI> and <HI>Turks,</HI> and <HI>Jews,</HI></L>
<L>I'le &s;end yee to a Rendezvous,</L>
<L>Where it is &s;moaking new;</L>
<L>Go hear it at a <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e,</HI></L>
<L><HI>It cannot but be true.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>There Battles and Sea-Fights are Fought,</L>
<L>And bloody Plots di&s;play'd;</L>
<L>They know more Things then ere was thought,</L>
<L>Or ever was betray'd:</L>
<L>No Money in the Minting-hou&s;e</L>
<L>Is half &s;o Bright and New;</L>
<L>And coming from a <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e,</HI></L>
<L><HI>It cannot but be true.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Before the <HI>Navyes</HI> fall to Work.</L>
<L>They know who &s;hall be Winner,</L>
<L>They there can tell ye what the <HI>Turk</HI></L>
<L>La&s;t Sunday had to Dinner;</L>
<L>Who la&s;t did Cut <HI>de Ruyters</HI> Corns,</L>
<L>Among&s;t his jovial Crew;</L>
<L>Or who fir&s;t gave the <HI>Devil</HI> Horns,</L>
<L><HI>This &s;ounds as if' twere true.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>A <HI>Fi&s;herman</HI> did boldly tell,</L>
<L>And &s;trongly did avouch,</L>
<L>He Caught a Shoal of Mackarel,</L>
<L>That Parley'd all in <HI>Dutch,</HI></L>
<L>And cry'd out <HI>Yaw, Yaw, Yaw myn Heer;</HI></L>
<L>But as the Draught they drew,</L>
<L>They &s;tunk for fear, our Fleet being near,</L>
<L><HI>Which cannot but be true.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>There's nothing done in all the World,</L>
<L>From <HI>Monarch</HI> to the <HI>Mou&s;e,</HI></L>
<L>But every Day or Night 'tis hurld</L>
<L>Into the <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e.</HI></L>
<L>What <HI>Lillie</HI> or what <HI>Booker</HI> can</L>
<L>By Art, not bring about,</L>
<L>At <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e</HI> you'l find a Man,</L>
<L><HI>Can quickly find it out.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>They'l tell ye there, what Lady-ware,</L>
<L>Of late is grown too light;</L>
<L>What Wi&s;e-man &s;hall from Favour fall,</L>
<L>What Fool &s;hall be a Knight;</L>
<L>They'l tell ye when our fayling Trade,</L>
<L>Shall ri&s;e again, and Flori&s;h,</L>
<L>And when <HI>Jack Adams</HI> fir&s;t was made</L>
<L>Church-Warden of the Pari&s;h.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>They know who &s;hall in Times to come,</L>
<L>Be either made, or undone,</L>
<L>From great St. <HI>Peters-&s;treet</HI> in <HI>Rome,</HI></L>
<L>To <HI>Turnbul-&s;treet</HI> in <HI>London;</HI></L>
<L>And likewi&s;e tell, at <HI>Clerkenwell,</HI></L>
<L>What <HI>Whore</HI> hath greate&s;t Gain;</L>
<L>And in that place, what Brazen-face</L>
<L>Doth wear a Golden Chain.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>At Sea their Knowledge is &s;o much,</L>
<L>They know all Rocks and Shelves,</L>
<L>They know all Councils of the <HI>Dutch,</HI></L>
<L>More then they know them&s;elves;</L>
<L>Who 'tis &s;hall get the be&s;t at la&s;t,</L>
<L>They perfectly can &s;hew</L>
<L>At <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e,</HI> when they are plac'd,</L>
<L><HI>You'd &s;carce believe it true.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>They know all that is Good, or Hurt,</L>
<L>To Dam ye, or to Save ye;</L>
<L>There is the <HI>Colledge,</HI> and the <HI>Court,</HI></L>
<L>The <HI>Countrey, Camp,</HI> and <HI>Navie;</HI></L>
<L>So great a <HI>&V;niver&s;itie.</HI></L>
<L>I think there ne're was any;</L>
<L>In which you may a Schoolar be</L>
<L>For &s;pending of a Penny.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>A <HI>Merchants Prentice</HI> there &s;hall &s;how</L>
<L>You all and every thing,</L>
<L>What hath been done, and is to do,</L>
<L>'Twixt <HI>Holland</HI> and the <HI>King;</HI></L>
<L>What <HI>Articles</HI> of <HI>Peace</HI> will bee,</L>
<L>He can precizely &s;how;</L>
<L>What will be good for <HI>Them</HI> or <HI>Wee,</HI></L>
<L>He perfectly doth know.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Here Men do talk of every Thing,</L>
<L>With large and liberal Lungs,</L>
<L>Like Women at a Go&s;&s;iping,</L>
<L>With double tyre of Tongues;</L>
<L>They'l give a Broad-&s;ide pre&s;ently,</L>
<L>Soon as you are in view,</L>
<L>With Stories that, you'l wonder at,</L>
<L>Which they will &s;wear are true.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>The Drinking there of <HI>Chochalat,</HI></L>
<L>Can make a <HI>Fool</HI> a <HI>Sophie:</HI></L>
<L>'Tis thought the <HI>Turki&s;h Mahomet</HI></L>
<L>Was fir&s;t In&s;pir'd with <HI>Coffe,</HI></L>
<L>By which his Powers did Over-flow</L>
<L>The Land of <HI>Palestine:</HI></L>
<L>Then let us to, the <HI>Coffe-hou&s;e</HI> go,</L>
<L>'Tis Cheaper far then Wine.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>You &s;hall know there, what Fa&s;hions are;</L>
<L>How Perrywiggs are Curl'd;</L>
<L>And for a Penny you &s;hall heare,</L>
<L>All Novels in the World,</L>
<L>Both Old and Young, and Great and Small,</L>
<L>And Rich, and Poor, you'l &s;ee:</L>
<L>Therefore let's to the <HI>Coffe</HI> All,</L>
<L>Come All away with Mee.</L>
</LG>
</DIV1>
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<BACK>
<DIV1 TYPE="colophon">
<P><HI>London,</HI> Printed by <HI>E. Crowch,</HI> for <HI>T. Vere,</HI> at the Angel without <HI>New-gate&punc;</HI> 1672.</P>
</DIV1>
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