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<DATE>2008-11-05</DATE>
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<NAME>John Pas</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
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<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch B080916.pdcc.</ITEM>
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<IDG S="marc" R="UM" ID="B01388">
<STC T="W">a3354a</STC>
<BIBNO T="oclc">53298933</BIBNO>
<VID>179727</VID>
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<DIV1 TYPE="response">
<PB REF="1" MS="y"><!-- PDF PAGE 9 -->
<HEAD>AN ANSWER TO <HI>CLEMENS ALEXANDRINUS</HI>'s SERMON UPON <HI>Quis Dives Salvetur?</HI> What Rich Man can be Sav'd? Proving it ea&s;ie for a Camel to go through the Eye of a Needle.</HEAD>
<P><HI>Deliver'd at the Devil's Ar&s;e of Peak.</HI></P>
<P>WHEN we come to be <HI>laid up in the Sepulchres of our Fathers, the la&s;t Stage of our Throne of Mortality, the &s;ituation &s;eems to be &s;omewhat horrid: But upon review, the</HI> Ely&s;ian <HI>Vallies open with greater Amazement, and the rocky</HI> monumental <HI>Hills</HI> of Marble, <HI>that hang over in a more awful guard of it, &s;eem to be Art in|&s;ulting Nature. 'Tis not Parts, corrupted in the fine&s;t Head, on the Surface of which Straws and Feathers may Swim, while weightier Matters lie at the Bottom: 'Tis not Knowledge,</HI> de|fin'd by &s;ome to be a <HI>Bubble in the Water, a Meteor in the Air, or a Tumour and Spectacle:</HI> 'Tis not being of a <HI>Society</HI> for promoting <HI>Stocks, and Work-Hou&s;es, for erecting Parochial Libra|ries, or writing Parochial Antiquities, that can pre&s;erve us from having Gravel in our Mouths.</HI> Upon this deplorable Occa&s;ion, altho' my Writings have <HI>&s;unk into contempt and di&s;u&s;e,</HI> yet I &s;hall once again attempt a <HI>&s;erious and rational Di&s;cour&s;e,</HI> under the&s;e two <HI>Paradoxes,</HI> which <HI>my love of &s;ingularity make me fond to maintain.</HI> I &s;hall &s;hew, Fir&s;t, How a Good Rich Man may be never the Wor&s;e for living Odly? Secondly, I &s;hall explain the u&s;e of my <HI>Plank</HI> and <HI>Door</HI> in all Ca&s;es of de&s;perate Extremities.</P>
<P>As to the fir&s;t Point: A Good Rich Man <HI>may allow him&s;elf to climb up any Hill within his reach; to fatigue him&s;elf within Doors; to acquire Heat, and expel Moi&s;ture; to take a comfortable Breakfa&s;t, and then walk round his Lodgings; to have a Dinner provided for him about</HI> 12 <HI>a Clock; to have a Candle with ten or twelve Tobacco-pipes before him; then to &s;hut the Door and fall a Smoaking and Writing, and thinking how to dige&s;t what he had fed upon; to be jealous of being burnt for a Heretick, and afraid of the Bi&s;hop of</HI> Sarum; <HI>to run beyond Sea in a fright, and be driven back by the &s;ame: Not to endure Contradiction, or an empty Hou&s;e; in <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">his Sickne&s;s to ride upon a Feather-bed in a Coach; to bate any thoughts or di&s;cour&s;e of Death; to make him&s;elf a warm Coat the Winter before be dies;</HI> and if then he falls <HI>into a Pit, to catch hold of one of the Devil's cloven Feet, or of</HI> my <HI>Plank,</HI> which under the next Head, I &s;hall prove worth both of them.</P>
<P>Far be it from me to deny, that Gloves, Scarves, <HI>Funeral Sermons,</HI> and <HI>Memoirs,</HI> &amp;c. are proper to be us'd at the <HI>Ob&s;equies</HI> of the Dead, <HI>who too often affect Secrecy and Silence,</HI> as their Executors do a <HI>parcimonious narrowne&s;s of Mind.</HI> But the&s;e are things of an inferior Con&s;idera|tion to my <HI>Plank</HI> and <HI>Wicket.</HI> Some Philo&s;ophers <HI>have been glad to creep out of the World at any Hole;</HI> but I have a new <HI>Door of hope for them; provided they be Men of Parts and Figure,</HI> and will give Crape enough to <HI>con&s;ecrate their Memory</HI> with my <HI>Decorums.</HI> I have before in&s;inuated, that a good rich witty Man may do any thing but be damn'd. But I &s;ee &s;ome Peo|ple pricking up their Ears there. You Goodman <HI>Two &s;hoes,</HI> and you Gammer <HI>Two &s;hoes,</HI> and you <HI>Tom Trap,</HI> and you <HI>Dick Fro&s;t,</HI> and you Goody <HI>Gurton,</HI> that have lain in Straw ever &s;ince <HI>your Bed was taken away for Plunder in the Civil Wars,</HI> let me tell ye, you are <HI>poor &s;tupid Wretches;</HI> your <HI>duller Flame will be more ea&s;ily ex&s;tingui&s;h'd; you meaner &s;inful</HI> Scrubs <HI>are generally given over <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">o a reprobate Mind;</HI> your Barley Bread and Pea&s;e Pudding make you <HI>heavy</HI> and <HI>&s;tupid,</HI> and if <HI>you don't take care you will die as &s;tupidly as you liv'd.</HI> Therefore look to it, and begin to re|pent as &s;oon as you can; the &s;ooner the better for you, who are poor People. But Heav'n forbid <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">hat I &s;hou'd preach this Doctrine to you Mr. Alderman <HI>OCCASI,</HI> or to you Mr. <HI>ONALL</HI> the Re|order, to you the Wor&s;hipful Mr. Ju&s;tice <HI>Conform,</HI> or to you my honour'd Patrone&s;s, Lady <HI>Mity;</HI> you are Gentlefolks all, you are Per&s;ons of greate&s;t Wit, and Wealth, and Ability in this rich and <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">genious Corporation, whom I am glad to &s;ee at Church now and then, as your lei&s;ure will permit you. I be&s;eech you not to &s;urmi&s;e, that I mean the lea&s;t part of this to your Honours; <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">ll that I mean is this, <HI>Ordinary Abilities may be altogether &s;unk by a long vicious Cour&s;e of Life:</HI> But it is an undoubted Maxim, That <HI>Per&s;ons of di&s;tingui&s;h'd Sen&s;e and Judgment, by their nobler and brighter Parts, have an advantage of under&s;tanding the worth of their Souls, before they re&s;ign it:</HI> Therefore, Gentlefolks, I have re&s;erv'd for you an Expedient, call'd a Death-bed Repentance. After you have made <HI>Shipwreck</HI> of a good Con&s;cience, I have a <HI>Plank</HI> for you, upon which one <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">r two (I believe I can make room for you four Gentry) may e&s;eape. But do ye hear, you <HI><GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">eaner &s;inful Wretches,</HI> that don't &s;it upon <HI>Cu&s;hions,</HI> and are not A&s;leep, and have no Vote in <GAP DESC="illegible" EXTENT="1 letter">he Ve&s;try, it will be <HI>little Comfort</HI> for you in this <HI>Storm</HI> to <HI>expect the like Deliverance.</HI> Con&s;ider what has been &s;aid, and you will not ha&s;tily repent&mdash;of what you have heard.</P>
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