<!DOCTYPE ETS PUBLIC "-//UMDLPS//DTD EEBOPROOF 2.0//EN">
<ETS>
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<REVDESCR>
<CHANGE>
<DATE>2007-10-04</DATE>
<RESPSTMT>
<NAME>Jason Colman</NAME>
<RESP>MURP</RESP>
</RESPSTMT>
<ITEM>Proofed and reviewed as part of batch B070811.apex.</ITEM>
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<EEBO>
<IDG S="marc" R="OX" ID="A89942">
<STC T="W">N561A</STC>
<BIBNO T="oclc">45097870</BIBNO>
<VID>171450</VID>
</IDG>
<TEXT LANG="eng">
<BODY>
<DIV1 TYPE="ballad">
<PB REF="1"><!-- PDF PAGE 16 -->
<HEAD>A New BALLAD Of an Amorous Coachman, Who was &s;o difficult in plea&s;ing his Love-&s;ick Fancy; that after his &s;everal Ad|dre&s;&s;es to the Female Sex, he was at la&s;t Married: which made him cry out,</HEAD>
<ARGUMENT>
<L><HI>Ala&s;s! my Humour is &s;o hard to plea&s;e,</HI></L>
<L><HI>That I find Love, not Love, but a Di&s;ea&s;e;</HI></L>
<L><HI>Yes a Di&s;ea&s;e that rages in my Heart,</HI></L>
<L><HI>And wounds my Amorous Soul in ev'ry part:</HI></L>
<L><HI>I love and loath and both within an hour,</HI></L>
<L><HI>So &s;oon my Loathing Loving do's devour.</HI></L>
</ARGUMENT>
<DIV2 TYPE="permission to print">
<P>This may be Printed, <HI>R. P.</HI></P>
</DIV2>
<DIV2 TYPE="body of ballad">
<OPENER>To the Tune of, <HI>There was a brisk La&s;s.</HI></OPENER>
<DIV3 TYPE="part">
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<P><FIGURE>
</FIGURE></P>
<LG>
<L>I Went to the Fair to pick out a Wife,</L>
<L>That might be a comfort to my &s;vveet Life:</L>
<L>On pretty black <HI>Nanny</HI> I ca&s;t a Sheeps eye,</L>
<L>And told her for Love, I believ'd I &s;hou'd dye;</L>
<L>I ki&s;t her a little and thought that her breath</L>
<L>Had poy&s;oned me &s;o that I looked for Death,</L>
<L>She <GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="apex" EXTENT="2 letters">ink as &s;he &s;tood, like Carrion I'le &s;wear</L>
<L>So I found that I'de got the wrong Sow by the Eat.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>To <HI>Jenney</HI> they wi&s;ht me, indeed &s;he was fair</L>
<L>But a pox on he Carrots, I lik'd not red hair,</L>
<L>Her skin I did lov<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="apex" EXTENT="1 letter">, but her hair I did hate,</L>
<L>I ne'r in my Life cou<GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="apex" EXTENT="1 letter">d love Carrot-pate:</L>
<L>She told me of combs <GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="apex" EXTENT="2 letters">alter the hue</L>
<L>But I'faith I thought the were like True blew;</L>
<L>And therefore in ha&s;t I had <GAP DESC="illegible" RESP="apex" EXTENT="1 word"> adieu,</L>
<L>And nimbly I tript to vvanton <HI>Sue.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Kind <HI>Sue</HI> quoth I, I'me come to Wooe,</L>
<L>Love perches methinks upon thy brow,</L>
<L>In troth cry'd &s;he, if thou meane&s;t to be mine</L>
<L>A pair of good Horns &s;hall perch on thine</L>
<L>This nettl'd me &s;o that I ran away,</L>
<L>True words &s;poke in je&s;t we often do &s;ay:</L>
<L>With head and with heart both brimful of pain</L>
<L>Away I did &s;camper to Mrs. <HI>Jane.</HI></L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>She &s;eem'd very coy, it pleas'd me the more,</L>
<L>I lik'd her much better than all before;</L>
<L>In the Room was a bed to work we went</L>
<L>And hardly ten minutes of time was &s;pent,</L>
<L>Before I perceiv'd her Iewel was lo&s;t,</L>
<L>And thus my fond hopes and purpo&s;e were cro&s;t:</L>
<L>I thought it high-time, the Coachman was fled</L>
<L>Perceiving the want of her Maiden head.</L>
</LG>
</DIV3>
<DIV3 N="2" TYPE="part">
<PB REF="1">
<HEAD>The Second Part,</HEAD>
<OPENER>to the &s;ame Tune.</OPENER>
<LG>
<L>Then <HI>Mary</HI> and I walkt cut to take Air,</L>
<L>She had a fine skin and delicate hair,</L>
<L>I thought my &s;elf ble&s;t by the Pow'rs above,</L>
<L>For troth I was &s;mitten and much in Love:</L>
<L>But &s;he was cro&s;s and as peevi&s;h a Whore,</L>
<L>As any old Iade can be at three&s;core;</L>
<L>She thwarted me &s;till in whatever I &s;aid,</L>
<L>And then I drove on to a na&s;ty Iade.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Her name was <HI>Rebecca,</HI> in holy-day Clothes</L>
<L>She was &s;mug, and far &s;weeter than Munday-Ro&s;e</L>
<L>When they were lock'd up &s;he-look'd as black</L>
<L>As the Mourning Suit on my Ma&s;ters back;</L>
<L>I fancy the Sow and Pigs &s;he trac'd,</L>
<L>For up to the knee her coat was lac'd,</L>
<L>Her Smock was as black as the Hood &s;he wdre,</L>
<L>I bad her be gone for a na&s;ty whore.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>To <HI>Deborah</HI> then in ha&s;t I ran,</L>
<L>Her skin was as &s;mooth as Feathers of Swan,</L>
<L>I told her I lov'd her, and canted with Zeal</L>
<L>And try'd by Religion her Pul&s;e to feel:</L>
<L>But &s;ay what I would, &s;he an&s;wer'd me nay,</L>
<L>Thought I, I &s;hall not be marry'd to day:</L>
<L>She &s;igh'd and &s;he whin'd when I askt her to marry</L>
<L>She often would cry, good Coachman tarry.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>Then I &s;neakt off, and to <HI>Dolly</HI> I went,</L>
<L>In whom I expected to find content:</L>
<L>But <HI>Dolly</HI> was damnable proud and high</L>
<L>To the Coach-box before me, &s;he needs would fly;</L>
<L>I took up my Whip and I gave her a lick</L>
<L>She &s;aid &s;he abhorr'd me for that trick:</L>
<L>And now the poor Coachman mu&s;t lye all alone,</L>
<L>For he's envy'd by &s;ome, and pittied by none.</L>
</LG>
<LG>
<L>But &s;tay, la&s;t of all his Fortunes to mend,</L>
<L>To <HI>Dorcas</HI> the Coach-man was wi&s;h'd by a Friend</L>
<L>Who &s;aid &s;he would make him amends for the lo&s;s</L>
<L>Of all his old Sweethearts, for &s;he was not cro&s;s;</L>
<L>So the Coachman was married he thought to con|tent,</L>
<L>But he ever &s;ince do's live to repent,</L>
<L>His Wife had &s;ome faults, which I'le tell you in brief</L>
<L>She was a Pick-pockit, a Whore &amp; a Thief.</L>
</LG>
</DIV3>
</DIV2>
</DIV1>
</BODY>
<BACK>
<DIV1 TYPE="colophon">
<P>Printed for <HI>P. Brooksby</HI> at the <HI>Golden Ball</HI> in <HI>Pye-corner.</HI></P>
</DIV1>
</BACK>
</TEXT>
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