The Book of Good Manners

W. C. Green

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    A GUIDE TO POLITE USAGE
    FOR ALL SOCIAL FUNCTIONS
    THE BOOK OF GOOD MANNERS is a complete and authentic authority on every single phase of social usage as practiced in America. The author has compiled the matter in dictionary form in order to give the reader the desired information as briefly and clearly as possible, and with the least possible effort in searching through the pages.

    A

    ACCEPTING OR DECLINING INVITATIONS. See INVITATIONS,
           ACCEPTING OR DECLINING.

    ACCIDENTS. See STREET ETIQUETTE--MEN--ACCIDENTS.

    ADDRESS. The address of a person may be stamped
           on the stationery.

           If the address is stamped, it is not customary
           to stamp also the crest or monogram.

    ADDRESSING ENVELOPES.

      MEN. A man should be addressed as Mr. James
           J, Wilson, or James J. Wilson, Esq. Either
           the Mr. or the Esq. may be used, but not
           the two together.

           The title belonging to a man should be
           given. It is not customary to use Mr. or
           Esq. when Jr. or Sr. is used.

      WOMEN. A woman's name should always have
           the Miss or Mrs.

           A woman should never be given her husband's
           official title, as Mrs. Judge Wilson.

           If a woman has a title of her own, she
           should be addressed as Dr. Minnie Wilson,
           when the letter is a professional one. If
           a social letter, this should be Miss Minnie
           Wilson, or Mrs. Minnie Wilson.

    ADDRESSING PERSONS. Young girls should be spoken
           of as Minnie Wilson, and not as Miss Minnie,
           but are personally addressed as Miss Minnie.
           Only the greatest intimacy warrants a man
           in addressing a young girl as Minnie.

           Parents should introduce their daughter
           as My daughter Minnie, but should speak
           of them before servants as Miss Minnie.

           A married woman should be spoken of as
           Mrs. Agnes Wilson, and personally addressed
           as Mrs. Wilson.

    ADDRESSING AND SIGNING LETTERS. All answers to
           invitations should be addressed to the party
           issuing them.

           Letters to a woman who is a comparative
           stranger may begin My dear Mrs. Wilson,
           and to a closer acquaintance Dear Mrs.
           Wilson.

           Letters to a man who is a comparative
           stranger may begin My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and to a closer acquaintance Dear Mr.
           Wilson.

           For forms of addressing persons with titles,
           as Mayor, see under that title--as, Mayor,
           Governor.

           The letters may end, Sincerely yours, or
           Very truly yours, or I remain yours with
           kindest regards.

           The signature of a man should be John J.
           Wilson or J. Jones Wilson.

           An unmarried woman should sign social
           letters as Minnie Wilson, and a business letter
           as Miss Minnie Wilson. A married woman
           should sign a social letter as Agnes Wilson.
           In signing a business letter, a married woman
           may either sign her name Mrs. Agnes Wilson,
           or, preferably,

           Agnes Wilson
           (Mrs. John Wilson)

    AFTERNOON CALLS. These should be made between
           three and half-past five, and if possible on
           regular at home days.

           In making an afternoon call a man should
           wear the regulation afternoon dress.

      DRESS--MEN. Afternoon dress consists of a
           double-breasted frock coat of dark material,
           and waistcoat, either single or double-
           breasted, of same, or of some fancy material
           of late design. The trousers should be of
           light color, avoiding of course extremes in
           patterns.

           White or delicate color linen shirts should
           be worn, patent leather shoes, silk hat and
           undressed kid gloves of dark color.

           Afternoon dress is worn at weddings, afternoon
           teas, receptions, garden parties, luncheons,
           church funerals, and at all afternoon
           functions.

             See also EVENING DRESS--MEN. MORNING
             DRESS--MEN.

    AFTERNOON RECEPTIONS. See AFTERNOON TEAS.
      GIVEN BY BACHELORS, See BACHELORS' TEAS.

    AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL). These are very successful
           as a rule, due perhaps to their small expense
           and few exactions, and are given with
           many purposes: to introduce young women
           into society, to allow a hostess to entertain a
           number of her friends, to honor some woman
           of note, etc.

           A formal afternoon tea is one for which
           cards have been issued, naming set date.

           Awnings and carpet should be provided
           from curb to house. A man should be stationed
           at the curb to open carriage doors and
           call them when the guests leave, and another
           African Teas man should be in attendance at the
           front door to open it the moment a guest appears
           at the top step and to direct him to the dressing-room.

           A policeman should be detailed for the occasion
           to keep back the onlookers, and should
           receive a small fee for his services.

           At the door of the drawing-room a man
           should ask the name of each guest, which he
           announces as the latter enters. The hostess
           and those receiving with her should be just
           within the door to receive the guests.

      CARDS. Each guest should leave a card in the
           tray in the hall.

           A woman may leave the cards of the men
           of her family who have been unable to attend.

           Cards should be sent by mail or messenger
           by those invited but unable to be present, and
           should be timed so that they reach the house
           during the function.

           A husband and wife each send a card when
           the invitation is issued in the name of the
           hostess only, and two cards each when issued
           in the name of hostess and her daughter. If
           issued in the name of both husband and
           wife, a husband should send two and his wife
           should send one card.

      DAUGHTERS. The daughters who have passed
           the debutante age usually stand for an hour
           beside their mother to receive the guests,
           and afterward mingle with the guests to help
           to make the function a success.

      DEBUTANTE. When a tea is given in honor of
           a debutante, she stands beside the hostess
           (usually her mother), and each guest is introduced
           to her. Flowers should be liberally
           provided, and friends may contribute on such
           an occasion.

           The host and the men all wear the regulation
           afternoon dress.

           Women wear costumes appropriate to the
           afternoon, more elegant in proportion to the
           elaborateness of the function.

           Guests may suit their convenience in
           arriving, provided they do not come at the
           opening hour nor at the very end.

           After leaving their wraps in the dressing-
           rooms, guests enter the drawing-room, leaving
           their cards in the tray in the hall, and
           then giving their names to the man at the
           door, who announces them.

           On entering the room, the women precede
           the men.

           After greeting the hostess and being introduced
           to those receiving with her, the guests
           move into the middle of the room.

           Guests go the dining-room when they
           wish without greeting the hostess.

           It is not expected that guests at a large reception
           will stay all the afternoon. Twenty
           minutes is long enough. It is not necessary
           to bid the hostess good-bye when leaving.
           If guests take leave of host and hostess,
           they should shake hands.

           In the dining-room the men, assisted by
           the waiters, help the women.

           When the reception is a small formal one,
           the guests may stay a longer time, and usually
           it is better to take leave of the hostess,
           unless she is much occupied at the time.

      HOST. Except when a newly married couple
           give a house-warming or a reception, the host
           does not stand beside his wife, but spends
           the time in making introductions, and doing
           his best to make the function a success.

           When some married woman or woman
           guest of honor assists his wife to receive, he
           should at the proper moment escort her to
           the dining-room.

      HOSTESS. The hostess and those receiving with
           her should be just within the door, ready to
           receive each guest as announced.

           The hostess shakes hands with each guest,
           and introduces them to those receiving with
           her.

           Friends assisting a hostess to entertain are
           generally permitted to invite a few of their
           own friends, and their cards are sent with
           those of the hostess. A pretty feature is the
           presence of a number of young women here
           and there in the rooms to assist in receiving
           the guests. Music is always appropriate.

      HOURS. The hours are from 4 to 7 P.M.

      INTRODUCTIONS. The hostess should introduce
           her guests to those receiving with her.
             See also INTRODUCTION.

      INVITATIONS. Engraved invitations are sent a
           week or ten days in advance, by mail or messenger.

           They are usually issued in the name of the
           hostess only, though they may be issued in
           the name of both husband and wife.

           In place of the visiting-card, an "At
           Home" card may be used, or cards specially
           engraved for the purpose.

           When cards are sent to a married couple,
           the cards are addressed to both husband and
           wife.

           Invitations are sent in two envelopes-the
           inner one unsealed and bearing the name of
           the guest, and the outer one sealed, with, the
           street address.

      INVITATIONS, ANSWERING. It is not necessary
           to accept or decline these invitations, as the
           guest accepts by his presence. If unable to
           do so, he should send by mail or messenger
           a visiting-card, to reach the hostess during
           the ceremony.

           When the invitation has been issued in the
           name of the hostess only, a husband and wife
           each send a card, and if in the name of hostess
           and her daughter, each should send two
           cards. If the invitation has been issued in
           the name of the husband and wife, the wife
           should send one and a husband two cards.

           If the woman in the family is the only one
           present at the function, she can leave cards
           for the rest of the family.

      MEN. Both the host and men wear the regulation
           afternoon dress, consisting of the long
           frock coat with single or double-breasted
           waistcoat to match, or of some fancy cloth,
           and gray trousers. White linen, a light tie,
           a silk hat, gray gloves, and patent leather
           shoes complete the costume.

           The overcoat, hat, and cane are left in
           the dressing-room, and the guest removes one
           or both gloves as he pleases--remembering
           that he must offer his ungloved right hand
           to the hostess.

      SHAKING HANDS. Guests on being presented to
           the hostess should shake hands. If guest
           takes leave of hostess, they should shake
           hands. If the hostess is surrounded by
           guests, a pleasant nod of farewell is admissible.

      WOMEN. Women leave cards of their male relatives
           as well as their own, even though their
           names may be announced upon entering.
           Guests leave their cards in a receptacle provided
           for the purpose, or give them to the
           servant at the door.

           Women wear a costume appropriate for
           the afternoon, and keep their hats and
           gloves on.

    AFTERNOON TEAS (INFORMAL). An afternoon tea is a
           simple entertainment. Refreshments are
           generally served to the guests. An innovation
           lately introduced has become quite popular
           --namely, young women, invited for
           the purpose, wait upon the guests, bringing
           in one dainty at a time.

           An afternoon tea is called a formal afternoon
           tea when engraved cards have been
           issued, naming set date.

      CARDS. Guests should leave cards in the hall, or
           hand them to the servant. Women may
           leave the cards of the men of her family.
           Those unable to attend should send card the
           same afternoon by mail or messenger.

             See also AFTERNOON TEAS (Formal)-Cards.

      DRESS. Both men and women wear afternoon dress.

      GUESTS. All guests, both men and women, wear
           afternoon dress.

           Guests may suit their convenience in arriving
           or departing--provided they do not
           come at the opening hour, nor stay to the
           last moment.

           After the guests have left their wraps in
           the dressing-rooms, they leave their cards in
           the tray in the hall and enter the drawing-
           room, the women preceding the men.

           After greeting the hostess and being introduced
           to those assisting her, the guests quietly move
           away and mingle with the rest.

           Each guest goes to the dining-room when
           he pleases and leaves when he wishes. It is
           not necessary upon departure to shake hands
           with the hostess at a large reception, though
           it is better to do so at a small affair.

           It is not necessary for a guest to stay the
           entire evening; twenty minutes is sufficient.

      HOST. If present, he does not receive with his
           wife. It is not essential that he be present
           on such an occasion.

      HOSTESS. The hostess wears full dress. Daughters
           may assist, or young women may be asked to do so.

      HOURS. From four to seven.

      INVITATIONS. For an afternoon tea a visiting-
           card may be used with the hour and date
           written or engraved on it. They may be sent
           by mail or messenger.

           The invitation need not be acknowledged.

    AFTERNOON WEDDING RECEPTIONS are conducted the
           same as Wedding Receptions, which see.

    AGRICULTURE, SECRETARY OF--HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have sir,
           the honor to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain most sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of Agriculture.

    AISLE PROCESSION.
             See WEDDING PROCESSION.

    ANGLICAN CHURCH ARCHBISHOP.
             See ARCHBISHOP.

    ANGLICAN CHURCH BISHOP.
             See BISHOP.

    ANNIVERSARIES--WEDDING. These are as follows:

           First year...................Paper

           Fifth year.................Wooden

           Tenth year ..................Tin

           Twelfth year.............Leather

           Fifteenth year ..........Crystal

           Twentieth year.............China

           Twenty-fifth year.........Silver

           Thirtieth year ............Ivory

           Fortieth year.............Woolen

           Forty-fifth year............Silk

           Fiftieth year............ Golden

           Seventy-fifth year...... Diamond

           Less attention is now paid than formerly
           to all those before the silver wedding. For
           specific information, see SILVER WEDDING, TIN
           WEDDING, etc.

    ANNOUNCEMENT--ENGAGEMENT.
             See ENGAGEMENT PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT.

    ANNOUNCING GUESTS--BALLS. The hostess decides
           whether or not the guests are to be announced.
           At public balls it is customary.

    ANSWERING INVITATIONS.
             See under FUNCTIONS, as
             DINNERS, INVITATIONS, etc.

    APPLES should be pared, cut into small pieces, and
           eaten with finders or forks.

    ARCHBISHOP OF ANGLICAN CHURCH--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: My Lord Archbishop,
           may it please your Grace, and ends:
           I remain, My Lord Archbishop, your Grace's
           most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Lord
           Archbishop, and ends: I have the honor to remain,
           my dear Lord Archbishop.

           The address on the envelop is: The Most
           Reverend, His Grace the Archbishop of Kent.

    ARCHBISHOP OF ROMAN CATHOLIC CHURCH--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official or social letter begins:
           Most Reverend and Dear Sir, and ends: I
           have the honor to remain your humble servant.

           The address on the envelope is: The Most
           Reverend John J. Wilson, Archbishop of Kent.

    ARTICHOKES are eaten with the fingers, taking off leaf
           by leaf and dipping into the sauce. The
           solid portion is broken up and eaten with a
           fork.

    ASPARAGUS. The stalks may be taken between the
           finger and the thumb, if they are not too
           long, or the green end may be cut off and
           eaten with a fork, scraping off with the
           knife what is desired from the remaining
           part.

    AT HOMES.

      AFTERNOON AT HOMES. The days for receiving
           are engraved in the lower left hand
           corner of the card, with hours specified if one
           wishes.

           No changes should be made in these hours
           by the hostess unless for exceptional reasons,
           and she should always be present at the
           time set.

           Unless very intimate, the call should be
           made only on the specified days.

      BACHELORS. It is not customary for a bachelor
           to use "At Home" cards as a woman does,
           nor to invite his friends by writing a date
           and Music at four on his calling-cards in
           place of an invitation.

      DRESS. In the afternoon the caller should wear
           afternoon dress, and in the evening evening
           dress.

      ACKNOWLEDGING INVITATIONS. Invitations to
           an ordinary at home need no acknowledgment.

      INVITATIONS. Cards for an "At Home" are engraved
           with the hour for beginning the
           entertainment--as, Chocolate at 4.30 o'clock.
           The invitations to a formal "At Home"
           should be sent in two envelopes, but to an
           ordinary "At Home" in one envelope. For
           informal affairs the hour may be written on
           an ordinary "At Home" card.

    B

    BACHELORS' DINNERS. They follow the usual custom
           of formal dinners, and may be as elaborate as
           desired. Women may be invited. Such
           dinners are often given for men only.

    C


      CALLS. Women do not call upon a bachelor
           after attending a dinner given by him.

      CHAPERONE. If women are present, a married
           woman as chaperone is indispensable, and
           her husband must also be invited. The host
           should call upon the chaperone and personally
           request the favor.

           The chaperone is taken into dinner by the
           host, unless the latter takes in the woman in
           whose honor the dinner may be given. In
           the latter case, the chaperone is seated at the
           host's left. She gives the signal for the
           women to leave the dining-room.

           All guests should be introduced to the
           chaperone, and she should be called upon
           after a short time by the host.

      DRESS. All guests wear evening dress.

      HOST. The host should call upon the chaperone
           within a few days after the dinner.

           If men only are present, he either precedes
           or follows the guests into the dining-room,
           and if he has given the dinner in honor of
           some man, he has the latter seated at his
           right. His duties are the same as the host
           at dinners.

      INVITATIONS. These are usually given in brief
           notes, but may be engraved, and are similar
           to the regular invitations to dinners, and are
           treated accordingly.

      MEN. The men wear evening dress, and follow
           the same etiquette as at other dinners.

      WOMEN. The women wear evening dress, and
           follow the same etiquette as at all dinners,
           except that no calls are made by them afterward
           upon the host.

    BACHELOR'S FAREWELL DINNER. If the groom wishes,
           he may give a farewell dinner a few evenings
           before the wedding to his best man, ushers,
           and a few intimate friends. He sits at the
           head of the table and the best man opposite,
           and on this occasion he may give scarf-pins,
           link cuff-buttons--or neckties and gloves, if
           he wishes--to the best man and ushers.

    BACHELORS' LUNCHEONS. These are conducted like
           BACHELOR'S DINNERS, which see. The one difference
           is that, should the luncheon be given
           before 6 P.M., afternoon dress should be worn.

    BACHELORS' OPERA PARTIES. See THEATRE AND OPERA
           PARTIES GIVEN BY MEN.

    BACHELORS' SUPPERS. These are conducted the same
           as BACHELOR'S DINNERS, which see.

    BACHELORS' TEAS OR AFTERNOON RECEPTIONS.

      CHAPERONES. If women are present, a married
           chaperone is indispensable, who should be
           the first person invited by personal call.

           The chaperone at a small affair pours the
           tea, and at a large one she receives with the
           host, and each guest is presented to her.

           The host conducts the chaperone to her
           carriage, and also any other women who may
           have assisted her.

      DRESS. The hosts and guests wear afternoon
           dress.

      INVITATIONS. These maybe oral, brief notes, or,
           for a large affair, engraved, and should be
           sent from three days to a week in advance.

      HOST. The host should greet his guests at the
           door, shaking hands with each one, and introducing
           to the chaperone those not known
           to her.

           He introduces guests who are strangers to
           each other, bids them adieu, accompanies the
           women to the door, and escorts the chaperone
           to her carriage, and if she has come
           alone without one, may very properly escort
           her home.

           If at a large reception several women have
           helped him entertain, he should thank them
           and see them to their carriages.

           He will, of course, see that there is provided
           a dressing-room for women with a maid to
           wait upon them, and that the rooms are in
           good order, well furnished with flowers, and
           that the refreshments are attended to.
             See also INVITATIONS.

      MEN. Afternoon dress is worn.

      WOMEN. The invitations, engraved or oral,
           should be promptly acknowledged.

           Women wear dress customary at afternoon
           teas, and on their entrance should greet the
           host. Upon departing they take leave of him,
           though this is not necessary if the reception
           be a large one.

           If a young woman knows that a chaperone
           is present, she need not have her own chaperone
           accompany her.

           If the chaperone leaves early, she should do
           likewise.

    BACHELORS' THEATRE PARTY. See THEATRE AND OPERA
           PARTIES GIVEN BY MEN.

    BADGES--BALLS (PUBLIC). It is customary for men
           and women on the committees to wear on the
           left side of the breast ornamental badges,
           embroidered with the official position of the
           wearer.

    BAGGAGE. If a man is traveling with a woman, he
           should see to the checking and care of her
           baggage.
             See also TRAVELING.

      WEDDING TRIP. The best man should, some
           time before the wedding, see that the baggage
           of the bridal couple has been checked, and
           the checks given to the groom.
             See also BEST MAN.

    BALLS. A ball is an evening function, beginning at
           a late hour, devoted wholly to dancing. The
           costumes are more elaborate, the supper arrangements
           more extensive, and the floral
           decorations more lavish than at a dance.

      ACCEPTING INVITATION TO DANCE. While a
           young woman may accept or decline any invitation
           to dance, it is considered an act of discourtesy
           to refuse one man for a dance and
           to accept an invitation thereafter for the
           same dance from another.

      ANNOUNCING GUESTS. The hostess decides
           whether or not the guests are to be announced.
           At public balls it is customary.

      ANSWERING INVITATIONS. These should be answered
           immediately, and if declined, the
           ticket should be returned.

      ARRIVING AT. There is no set rule when guests
           should arrive.

           In the city, guests should arrive anywhere
           between eleven and twelve, and in the country,
           fifteen minutes after the hour set in the
           invitation.

      ASKING WOMEN TO DANCE. A man asks for
           the privilege of a dance either with the
           daughter of the hostess, with any guest of
           the latter, or with any young woman receiving
           with her.

           On being introduced to a woman, he may
           ask her for a dance, and should be punctual
           in keeping the engagement.

           It is her privilege to end the dance at any
           moment she wishes, after which he should
           conduct her to her chaperone or find a seat
           for her, after which he is at liberty to go
           elsewhere.

           If for any cause a man has to break his
           engagements to dance, he should personally
           explain the matter to every woman with
           whom he has an engagement and make a
           suitable apology.

    BALLS, ASSEMBLY. The etiquette at an assembly
           ball is much the same as at a private ball,
           the functions and duties of the hostess being
           filled by a committee of women selected for
           that purpose.

           On entering the room, the guests bow to
           the committee and pass on.

           It is not necessary to take leave of the
           committee.

      CARRIAGE. A man should provide a carriage
           in which to call for the woman he escorts
           and her chaperone.

      CHAPERONES. For a small ball given in a private
           house, the hostess need not invite the mothers
           of the young women, and the young women
           can properly attend, knowing that the hostess
           will act as a chaperone.

           But at a large ball it is necessary to invite
           the mother as well as the daughters, and
           the chaperone as well as the debutante under
           her care. The mother can send regrets for
           herself, and send her daughters in care of a
           maid. Or she can attend, and, after remaining
           a suitable time, she may entrust her
           daughter to the care of a chaperone who
           intends to remain the whole evening.

    BALLS FOR DEBUTANTE.

      DRESS. A debutante should dress in white or
           some extremely delicate color, and wear very
           little jewelry--some simple brooch or single
           piece of jewelry, or a slender chain of pearls.

      DUTIES OF DAUGHTERS. Except at her own
           debut, a daughter does not assist her mother
           in receiving. She should be ready, however,
           to see that young women have partners, and
           to speak, without introduction, to strangers.

      GUEST OF HONOR. If the ball is given in honor
           of some special person, he should be met on
           his arrival, introduced to the women of the
           reception committee, escorted to the seat prepared
           for him, and be looked after the entire
           evening.

           At the end of the ball he should be escorted
           to his carriage.

      DUTIES OF HOST. It is not necessary that a
           man receive with his wife. He should do all
           he can to help make the ball successful,
           especially if his name appears on the invitation.
           He should assist in finding partners
           for the women, taking the chaperones into
           supper, preventing the men from selfishly
           remaining in the dressing-room, and at the
           end escorting unattended women to their
           carriages.

           When a formal supper is served, he takes
           into supper the leading chaperone.

      DUTIES OF HOSTESS. As a ball is an entertainment
           for dancing, it is better to give two
           small balls where the guests are not crowded
           than one where they are. It is permissible
           for a hostess not having sufficient room to
           hire rooms in some place suitable for the
           purpose.

           In selecting guests, it is wise to have more
           men present than women.

           The hostess should see to it that the rooms
           are well ventilated and well lighted. An
           awning and a carpet from the street to the
           hall door should be provided.

           The hostess should stand near the door,
           prepared to receive the guests as they enter,
           shaking hands with each one, friend or
           stranger, and introducing any woman who
           may receive with her.

           A hostess herself should not dance until
           late in the evening, unless she knows that
           nearly all her guests have arrived.

           A wise hostess will personally see that the
           women are provided with partners, and that
           diffident young men are introduced.

           The hostess should see that the floor is
           suitable for dancing, that music is arranged,
           programs printed, that dressing-rooms, one
           for the men and one for the women, are arranged
           for with suitable attendants.

           The hostess should stand where the guests
           can take leave of her, and should shake
           hands with each when leaving.

      HOURS. In the city the hour for a ball to begin
           is from 10.30 to 11 P.M., but in the country
           the hour is earlier--from 9 to 9.30.

           A public ball begins promptly at the time
           mentioned in the announcement.

      INVITATIONS. These are issued from ten to
           twenty days before the ball, and should be
           answered immediately.

           For an impromptu dance, they may be
           issued within a few days of the affair.

           These invitations should be engraved. As
           a general rule, it is not now customary to put
           on them the letters R. S. V. P.

           But when an engraved invitation is posted,
           two envelopes are used, the inner one bearing
           the person's name only and unsealed, and
           the outer bearing both the name and address
           and sealed.

           If the ball has any peculiar feature, as a
           masquerade or costume, the invitation should
           have some words to that effect in the lower
           left hand corner--as, Costume of the XVIIth
           Century, Bal Masque, or Bal Poudre.

      INVITATIONS ASKED FOR STRANGERS. If a
           hostess receives a request from friends for
           invitations for friends of theirs, she can properly
           refuse all such requests, and no friend
           should feel aggrieved at a refusal for what
           she has no right to ask and which the hostess
           is under no obligation to give. If the
           hostess chooses to grant the request, well and
           good.

           She would naturally do so when the request
           is for a near relative, or the betrothed of the
           one making the request.

           A man should never ask for an invitation
           to a ball for another person, except for his
           fiancee or a near relative.

           A woman may ask for an invitation for her
           fiance, a brother, or a male friend of long
           standing, or for a visiting friend. She should
           take care that she does not ask it for some
           one known to the hostess and whom the latter
           does not desire to invite. No offense should be
           felt at a refusal save, possibly, in the case of a
           brother, sister, or fiance.

      INVITATIONS GIVEN BY A NEWCOMER. When a
           newcomer in a neighborhood desires to give
           a ball but has no visiting list, it is allowable
           for her to borrow the visiting list of
           some friend. The friend, however, arranges
           that in each envelope is placed a calling-card
           of her own, so that the invited ones may know
           that she is acting as sponsor for the newcomer.

      INVITATIONS ANSWERED. Every invitation
           should be answered as soon as possible, and
           in the third person if the invitation was in the
           third person. The answer should be sent to
           the party requesting the pleasure, even if
           many names are on the invitation.

           When a subscriber to a subscription ball
           invites a friend who is a non-subscriber, she
           encloses her card in the envelope, and the invited
           friend sends the answer to the subscriber
           sending the invitation.

      INTRODUCTIONS. When a man is introduced to a
           woman at a ball, he should ask her for a
           dance.

      MEN AT. Courtesy toward his hostess and consideration
           for his friends demands that a
           man who can dance should do so.

           To accept an invitation to a ball and then
           refuse to dance shows that a man is lacking
           in good breeding.

           A man finding few friends at a ball should
           ask some friend, or the hostess, to introduce
           him to some women whom he can invite to
           dance.

           It is an act of discourtesy for a man not to
           request a dance of a woman to whom he has
           been introduced.

           A man escorting a woman to a ball should
           agree where to meet her after they have each
           left their wraps at the dressing-rooms. It
           may be at the foot of the stairway or near
           the ball-room door.

           It is now no longer customary for the man
           and woman to enter arm in arm, but for the
           woman to precede the man, and together
           they greet the hostess. It is for the hostess
           to merely bow or to shake hands, and the
           guests follow her lead.

           A man should see that his companion's
           chaperone is comfortably seated, and then
           ask his companion for a couple of dances,
           and, with her permission, introduce other
           young men, who should ask her to dance.
           Such permission is not usually asked if the
           man is her fiance, a near relative, or an old
           friend.

           It is strictly the woman's prerogative to decide
           to retire, and no man should urge or
           hint to a woman to retire earlier than she
           wishes.

      MEN--CARRIAGE. A man asking a woman to
           accompany him to a ball should call in a carriage
           for her and her chaperone.

      MEN--DRESS. Men wear full evening dress in
           summer or winter, city and town.

           Gloves of white dressed kid should be worn
           at all balls.

      NEWCOMERS. See BALLS-INVITATIONS GIVEN BY
           NEWCOMERS.

      PATRONESSES. See PUBLIC BALLS--PATRONESSES.

      TIPPING SERVANTS. Only at public balls is it
           customary to give a tip to the men and
           women in charge of the cloak-room.

      SUPPER. Usually a buffet supper, being more
           easily handled and arranged for. Supper at
           tables requires many servants, much preparation,
           and great care.

      WOMEN AT. A mother should attend balls with
           her daughters, going and returning with
           them, and if she is not invited, they should
           decline the invitation. The father can act
           as escort if need be.

           After greeting the hostess and guests, the
           guests pay their respects to the head of the
           house if he is present.

           Taking leave of the hostess is unnecessary.

           It is no longer customary for a couple to
           enter arm in arm, but for the woman to precede
           the man. A mother, elder sister, or
           married woman takes the precedence over
           a daughter, younger sister, or unmarried
           woman.

           If not at once asked to dance, a young
           woman should take a seat by her chaperone.
           It is bad taste to refuse a dance with one
           man and then to dance that same dance with
           another.

           Both the hostess and the women wear their
           most elaborate costume for such an entertainment-
           decollete, short-sleeved, and a long train.

           For a less elaborate affair the costume
           may be plainer.

    BALLS, ASSEMBLY. See ASSEMBLY BALLS.

    BALLS, COSTUME. See COSTUME BALLS.

    BALLS, DEBUT. See DEBUT BALLS.

    BALLS, PUBLIC. See PUBLIC BALLS.

    BALLS, SUBSCRIPTION. See SUBSCRIPTION BALLS.

    BANANAS. The skin should be cut off with a knife,
           peeling from the top down, while holding in
           the hand. Small pieces should be cut or
           broken off, and taken in the fingers, or they
           may be cut up and eaten with a fork.

    BARON-HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           My Lord, and ends: I have the honor to be
           your Lordship's obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Baron Wilson.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lord Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, my dear Lord Wilson,
           very sincerely yours.

           The address is: To the Lord Wilson.

      DAUGHTER OF. See DAUGHTER OF BARON.

      WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF. See WIFE OF YOUNGER
           SON OF BARON.

    BARON, YOUNGER SON OF--How Addressed. An
           official letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have
           the honor to remain your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Mr. Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable John Wilson.

    BARONESS-HOW ADDRESSED, An official letter begins:
           Madam, and ends: I have the honor to remain
           your Ladyship's most obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable The Baroness Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Kent,
           and ends. Believe me dear Lady Kent, sincerely
           yours.

           The address is: To the Lady Kent.

    BARONET-HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           Sir, and ends: I have the honor to remain,
           sir, your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Sir John Wilson,
           or Dear Sir John, and ends: Believe me,
           dear Sir John, faithfully yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To Sir
           John Wilson, Bart.

      WIFE OF, See WIFE OF BARONET.

    BEST MAN. The best man is usually a bachelor, but
           may be a married man or a widower, and is
           selected by the groom. He fills an important
           position, requiring tact, administrative
           ability, and capacity to handle details. He
           acts as the groom's representative, confidential
           advisor, and business advisor.

           After his selection he should send a gift to
           the bride, and may, if he wish, send it to the
           groom-a custom not yet clearly established,
           and one not to be either encouraged or followed
           with safety.

           On the morning of the wedding-day he
           should have received both the ring and fee
           from the groom, and should personally see to
           the church and other details.

           He breakfasts with the groom, and together
           they drive to the church.

      CALLS. He should call on the bride's mother
           within two weeks after the ceremony, and
           also on the married couple upon their return
           from their wedding trip.

      CHURCH. He accompanies the groom into the
           chancel, and stands by his side till the bride
           appears, when he receives the groom's hat
           and gloves, and stands a little way behind
           him. When the clergyman bids the bride
           and groom join hands, he gives the ring to
           to the groom.

           At the conclusion of the ceremony, he
           gives the wedding fee to the clergyman, and
           hastily leaves the church to summon the
           groom's carriage and to return him his
           hat. He signs the register, if a witness is
           needed.

           It is a better arrangement to have the
           groom and the best man enter the church
           without their hats, and have the latter sent
           from the vestry to the church door, so that the
           groom may receive his when he leaves the
           church.

           Especially is this a good arrangement if
           the best man has to walk with the maid of
           honor down the aisle.

           After this, he hastens in his own carriage
           to the bride's home, to assist in meeting and
           introducing the guests at the reception or
           breakfast.

      DRESS. If the bride presents the best man with
           the boutonniere, he should go to her house
           on the wedding-day to have her put it in the
           lapel of his coat.

           He should dress as nearly as possible like the
           groom-wearing afternoon dress at an afternoon
           wedding, and at an evening wedding
           evening dress.

             See also GROOM-DRESS.

      EXPENSES. The best man is the guest of the
           groom, and in matters of expense this should
           be borne in mind.

      REPORTERS. If such is the wish of the family
           of the bride, the best man attends to the reporters,
           and furnishes them with the names
           of groom, bride, relatives, friends, description
           of gowns, and other details deemed
           suitable for publication.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The best man escorts
           the maid of honor, and they are usually
           seated at the bridal table.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. The best man stands
           with the married couple, and is introduced
           to the guests.

      WEDDING TRIP. He should arrange beforehand
           all details of the trip-as to tickets, parlor-car,
           flowers, baggage, etc. He alone knows the
           point of destination, and is in honor bound
           not to betray it, save in case of emergencies.
           He should see that the married couple
           leave the house without any trouble, and if
           the station is near, he should go in a separate
           carriage (provided by the groom) to personally
           attend to all details. He is the last
           one to see the married couple, and should return
           to the house to give their last message
           to the parents.

    BEST WISHES TO BRIDE. One should give best wishes
           to the bride and congratulations to the
           groom.

    BICYCLING. A man bicycling with a woman should
           extend to her all the courtesies practised
           when riding or driving with her, such as
           allowing her to set the pace, taking the lead
           on unfamiliar roads and in dangerous
           places, riding on the side nearest obstacles,
           etc.

      MEN--DRESS. A man should wear the regulation
           suit coat, waistcoat, and knickerbockers
           of gray or brown tweed, avoiding all
           eccentricities of personal taste.

    BIRTH (Announcement). If wishing to send congratulations
           after a birth, cards should be left in
           person or sent by a messenger. Cut flowers
           may be sent with the card.

    BISHOP OF THE ANGLICAN CHURCH--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: My Lord, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain your Lordship's
           most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My Dear Lord
           Bishop, and ends: I have the honor to remain,
           my Dear Lord Bishop, faithfully yours.

           The address on the envelope: To the Right
           Rev. The Lord Bishop of Kent.

    BISHOP (PROTESTANT)-HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Right Reverend and Dear Sir,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain your
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Bishop Wilson,
           and ends: I remain sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Reverend John J. Wilson, Bishop of,
           Montana.

    BISHOP (ROMAN CATHOLIC)--HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official or social letter begins. Right Reverend
           and Dear Sir, and ends: I have the honor
           to remain your humble servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Reverend John J. Wilson, Bishop of
           Ohio.

    BONNETS (THEATRE). A woman of any consideration
           should either wear no bonnet or remove it
           when the curtain rises.

           It would be in place for a man or a woman
           to politely request a woman whose bonnet
           obstructs the view to remove it, and, after
           it was done, to thank the woman for so
           doing.

    BOUQUETS (WEDDING). The bouquet carried by the
           bride is furnished by the groom, who should
           also provide bouquets for the bridesmaids.

    BOWING

      MEN, When leaving a woman at the door of
           her house, he bows and retires as the door
           is opened.

           When seeing a woman to her carriage, he
           should raise his hat on closing the door.

           On a railroad a man removes his hat in a
           parlor-car, but not in a day coach.

           In street-cars a man should raise his hat
           when giving his seat to a woman; also when
           rendering a service to a woman in public, in
           answering a question, or in apologizing to a
           woman.

           In elevators, when women are present,
           the hat should be removed.

           In hotel halls or corridors a man passing
           a woman should raise his hat.

           Men do not raise their hats to one another,
           save out of deference to an elderly person, a
           person of note, or a clergyman.

           In driving, if impossible to raise the hat,
           he should touch it with his whip.

           The hat is gracefully lifted from the head,
           brought to the level of the chest, and the
           body inclined forward, and then replaced in
           passing.

           It is the woman's privilege to bow first if
           it is a mere acquaintance. If, however, a
           woman bows, and the man fails to recognize
           her, he should bow in return.

           A man may bow first to a very intimate
           friend.

           Meeting a woman to whom he has been
           introduced at an entertainment, he should
           wait until she bows first.

           After bowing to a woman, the man may
           join her, and with her permission may walk
           a short distance with her.

           He should not stand in the street and converse
           with her any length of time. She may
           excuse herself and pass on. He should not
           feel affronted.

           If he meets a woman he does not know
           accompanied by a man he does know, both
           men bow.

           The man accompanying her should bow
           to every man or woman to whom she bows.

      WOMEN. A woman's bow should be dignified--
           a faint smile and a gentle inclination of the
           head.

           Women bow first to men when meeting in
           the street. A man may bow first if the
           acquaintance is intimate.

           When walking with a man, and they meet
           another unknown to her, but known to her
           escort, both men bow. If she meets a friend,
           man or woman, unknown to her escort, he
           bows.

           Unless an introduction has taken place at
           any function, no recognition is customary.
           It is the woman's privilege, however, to decide
           for herself whether she will recognize
           the guest or not.

           A man bowing and joining a woman on
           the street must ask permission to do so.
           She is at perfect liberty to gracefully decline.

           If a man stops to talk on the street, she
           may excuse herself and pass on. If she
           continues the conversation and he stands
           with his hat in his hand, she may request
           him to replace it. Such conversations should
           be brief.

    BREAD should be broken into small pieces, buttered,
           and transferred with the fingers to the mouth.
           The bread should be placed on the small
           plate provided for the purpose.

    BREAKFASTS. Breakfasts are generally given from
           ten to twelve in the morning. Very formal
           breakfasts are held at twelve o'clock.

      CALLS. A call need not be made after a simple
           breakfast, but obligatory after a formal one.

      DRESS. Street costumes are worn by men and
           women.

      GUESTS. Guests leave half an hour after the
           breakfast.

      HOURS. The hour is from 12 to 12.30.

      INVITATIONS. Cards are engraved and sent a
           week in advance for formal breakfasts, but
           for informal breakfasts they may be written.
           If given in honor of a special guest, the
           name is engraved on the card--as, TO MEET
           MR. WILSON.

      MEN. Men are usually invited, and they are
           often given for men. Men wear street costume.

           Guests should leave half an hour after
           breakfast. A call is not necessary after a
           simple breakfast, but obligatory after a formal
           one.

      MEN LEAVING CARDS. After a breakfast a man
           should leave a card for host and hostess,
           whether the invitation was accepted or not.
           Or it may be sent by mail or messenger, with
           an apology for so doing.

      WOMEN. Women wear street costume, including
           gloves, the latter being taken off at table.
           Women remove their coats and wraps, but
           not bonnets.

           Guests should leave half an hour after
           breakfast. A call is not necessary after a
           simple breakfast, but obligatory after a formal
           one.

      WEDDING. See WEDDING RECEPTIONS OR BREAKFASTS.

    BREAKING DINNER ENGAGEMENTS. When it is absolutely
           necessary to break an engagement made for
           a dinner, a letter should be sent as soon as
           possible to the hostess, either by special delivery
           or messenger, giving the reason and
           expressing regrets.

      BRIDE. The bride selects the church and the clergyman,
           and can, if she wishes, ask the latter
           personally or by note to perform the ceremony.
           She selects the music for the ceremony
           and the organist, names the wedding
           day, and selects the ushers and the bridesmaids.
           Of the bridesmaids, she may select
           one, some near friend, as the maid of honor,
           to act for her, as the best man does for the
           groom.

           She further designates one of the ushers to
           be master of ceremonies, and should instruct
           him minutely as to the details she desires
           carried out-how the wedding party shall enter
           the church, proceed up the aisle, etc.

           A few days before the wedding she gives a
           dinner to the bridesmaids and maid of honor,
           who take this opportunity to examine the
           trousseau. The ushers, best man, and groom
           may come after the dinner to attend the wedding
           rehearsal. These rehearsals should be
           gone through carefully, and if they can be
           held at the church so much the better. Each
           person should be instructed by note as to their
           duties, as this prevents confusion.

      CHURCH. On the wedding-day, after receiving
           the bridesmaids and maid of honor at her
           house, she goes to the church with her father
            (or nearest male relative), and leans upon his
           arm as they proceed up the aisle, following
           the bridesmaids, and carrying her bridal bouquet
            (or, if she wishes, a prayer-book).

           Arriving at the chancel, she leaves her
           father and steps forward to take the left arm
           of the groom, who advances from the chancel
           to meet her. They stand before the clergyman,
           and, if they wish, may kneel, and upon
           rising stand about a foot apart.

           At the words of the ceremony, "Who giveth
           this woman away?" or, "To be married to this
           man?" her father advances and places her
           right hand in that of the clergyman, who
           places it in the groom's right hand. After
           this her father retires to his seat in the pew
           with his family.

           When the plighting of the troth comes, the
           groom receives the ring from the best man
           and hands it to the bride, who gives it to the
           clergyman. He returns it to the groom, who
           then places it on the third finger of the bride's
           left hand. When plighting the troth, the
           bride gives her glove and bouquet to the maid
           of honor, or, what is better, the finger of the
           glove may be cut to allow the ring to be placed
           on without the glove being removed.

           The kiss at the altar is no longer in good
           form.

           At the end of the ceremony, after the clergyman
           has congratulated the married couple,
           the bride takes her husband's right arm and
           they lead the procession to the vestibule, where
           they receive the congratulations of near
           friends. Here the maid of honor and bridesmaids
           cloak and prepare the bride for the trip
           home in the groom's carriage.

      DRESS. The bride is veiled, and is dressed in
           white-full dress, day or evening. Gloves
           need not be worn in the church. The bridesmaids
           provide their own outfit, unless the
           bride asks them to dress in a style of her own
           selecting. In this case, she supplies them
           gowns, hats, gloves, and shoes, as she may
           wish.

      FAREWELL LUNCHEON. While a farewell luncheon
           given to the bridesmaids by the bride
           is not necessary, yet it is a pleasant way for a
           woman to entertain her female friends the
           last time in her father's house.

           On this occasion it is a good plan for the
           bride to give to the maid of honor and brides-maids
           her souvenirs, which, of course, should
           be alike, and of use at the wedding ceremony.

      GIFTS. The bride may give to the groom a ring
           as an engagement ring if she wishes. She
           should make suitable gifts to the bridesmaids
           as souvenirs of the occasion, and may also
           present them with flowers. If she presents
           boutonnieres to the best man and the ushers,
           they should appear at her house before the
           ceremony and have her place them in the
           lapel of their coats.

           She should acknowledge immediately the
           receipt of all wedding gifts.

      GLOVES. The bride need not wear gloves in the
           church.

      INVITATIONS. At a church wedding the bride
           usually provides the bridesmaids with extra
           invitations for their personal use.

      KISS. Only the parents of the bride and her
           most intimate relatives should kiss the bride.
           It is now no longer good form for all to do so.

      SEEING GROOM ON WEDDING-DAY. It is not
           customary for the bride to see the groom on
           the wedding-day till she meets him at the
           altar.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The bride and groom
           occupy the centre one of the small tables.

           At all wedding breakfasts it is customary
           for the guests to assemble in the drawing-room,
           and then to enter the breakfast-room
           together--the bride and groom leading the
           way.

           It is not usual to have the bridal cake at
           a wedding breakfast, but if such is the case,
           the bride makes the first cut, and the slices
           are given first to those at the bridal table.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. She should stand by her
           husband's side to receive the best wishes of all
           present. The guests are not announced, but
           are introduced by the ushers to the bride if
           not known to her.

           The bride should not leave her place to
           mingle with the guests until all have been
           introduced to her.

    BRIDE'S FAMILY. See FAMILY OF BRIDE.

    BRIDE'S FATHER. See FATHER OF BRIDE.

    BRIDE'S MOTHER. See MOTHER OF BRIDE.

    BRIDEGROOM. See GROOM.

    BRIDESMAIDS. The bridesmaids are selected by the
           bride, and number six, eight, or twelve--
           mostly eight. She usually gives them a
           dinner a few days before the wedding, at
           which she shows them the trousseau and discusses
           the details of the wedding.

           The ushers and the groom are invited to
           come after the dinner, and then the rehearsal
           takes place. The bridesmaids should be
           present at this and all other rehearsals, and
           if unable to be present at the wedding should
           give the bride ample notice, that a substitute
           may be secured.

      CALLS. They call upon the mother of the bride
           within a week or ten days after the ceremony,
           and upon the bride, in her own home, after
           her return from her wedding trip.

      CARRIAGES. A carriage provided by the family
           of the bride calls for the bridesmaid on the
           wedding-day, and takes her to the bride's
           house. Her carriage follows the bride's to the
           church, and, after the ceremony, takes her to
           the wedding breakfast or reception.

      CHURCH. They meet at the house of the bride,
           and there take their carriages to the church.
           While their carriages follow that of the bride,
           they alight first and receive her in the vestibule.
           They may carry bouquets supplied by
           the bride's family or the groom.

           In the procession tip the aisle they follow
           the ushers, walking two by two, and as the
           ushers approach the altar they divide--one-half
           to the right and one-half to the left. The
           bridesmaids do likewise, leaving space for
           the bridal party to pass.

           In the procession down the aisle they follow
           the best man and maid of honor to the
           vestibule, where, after giving their best wishes
           to the bride, and congratulations to the
           groom, they return to the bride's home to
           assist in entertaining the guests at the reception
           or breakfast.

      DANCING. At the wedding breakfast or reception
           dancing is sometimes indulged in.

      DINNER TO MARRIED COUPLE. The bridesmaids
           usually give a dinner to the married couple
           on the latter's return from their wedding trip.

      DRESS. They usually follow the wishes of the
           bride in the matter of dress. Should she
           desire any particular style of dress, entailing
           considerable expense, on account of novelty
           or oddity, she usually presents them the outfit,
           which it is permissible for them to accept.

           If the bride has no particular wish, they
           decide the matter among themselves, always
           bearing in mind that their style of dress and
           material must be subordinated to that of the
           bride, and that there could be no greater exhibition
           of lack of refinement and good taste
           than for any bridesmaid to make herself in
           any way more attractive than the bride.

      GIFTS. It is customary for them to send a wedding
           gift to the bride.

           They usually receive a pretty souvenir
           from the bride and a bouquet from the
           groom.

      INVITATIONS. At a large church wedding several
           invitations are usually given to the
           bridesmaids for their own personal use.

      REHEARSALS. They should be present at all
           rehearsals.

      WEDDING BREAKFASTS. They pair off with the
           ushers, and are usually seated at a table by
           themselves.

      WEDDING RECEPTIONS. They stand beside the
           married couple, and are introduced to the
           guests.

    BROTHER AT DEBUT. A brother, when his sister's
           debut takes the form of a supper or dinner,
           should take his sister (the debutante) into
           dinner or supper.

    BUTLER--TIPS. It is customary for a man leaving a
           house-party where he has been a guest to
           tip the butler who acted as a valet.

    CABINET ( U. S,), MEMBER OF--HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have,
           sir, the honor to remain your most obedient
           servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain
           most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of State.

    CAKE. is broken into pieces, the size of a mouthful,
           and then eaten with fingers or fork.

    CALLS. Unless close intimacy exists, calls should
           only be made on the specified days.

      ASKING MEN TO CALL ON WOMEN. A debutante
           should leave this matter to her mother
           or chaperone.

           A young woman, until she has had some
           experience in society, should be very careful
           in inviting men to call.

           She should not invite a man to call whom
           she has met for the first time. No man
           should be invited to call until she is assured
           of his social standing and character.

           In some parts of the country men first ask
           permission to call, and in other parts women
           first ask men to call.

      ASKING WOMEN TO CALL ON WOMEN. It is
           generally the custom for the married or elder
           woman to ask the unmarried or younger
           woman to call.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS
           --CALLS.

      BREAKFAST. See BREAKFASTS--CALLS.

      BEST MAN. See BEST MAN--CALLS

      BRIDESMAIDS. See BRIDESMAIDS--CALLS.

      CHAPERONES. See CHAPERONES--MEN CALLING.

      BUSINESS. A business man may call in street
           dress upon a woman before six o'clock.

           Social visits may be made in the same
           manner.

      DAYS AT HOME. Calls should only be made on
           the regular "At Home" days, and the
           hostess should always be present on that day.
           Very intimate friends may set aside this rule.

      DEBUTANTE. See DEBUTANTE--CALLS.

      DRESS. When making an afternoon call, a man
           would wear afternoon dress, and evening
           dress in making an evening call.

      HIGH TEA. See HIGH TEA--CALLS.

      HOURS. When no special day for receiving is
           indicated, calls may be made at any proper
           hour, according to the custom of the locality.
           Men of leisure may call at the fashionable
           hours from two till five in the afternoon, while
           business and professional men may call between
           eight and nine in the evening, as their
           obligations prevent them from observing the
           fashionable hours.

      LENGTH. A formal call may last from fifteen to
           thirty minutes. Old friends may stay longer.

      LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEON--CALLS.

      MEN. AFTER ENTERTAINMENTS. After an entertainment
           a man should call in person on
           host and hostess, whether the invitation was
           accepted or not. If a card is sent or mailed,
           it should be accompanied with an apology.

           To call on an acquaintance in an opera
           box does not relieve one of the duty of making
           a formal call in return for social favors.

           When calling on the hostess but not on
           the host, a man should leave a card for him.
           If the hostess be out, he should leave two
           cards.

           Married men can return their social obligations
           to women by personal calls, or the
           women of the family can leave the men's
           cards with their own.

           A call should be made the day following a
           luncheon or a breakfast; the same after a
           dinner, or at least within a week. A call
           should be made within a week after a ball.

           After a theatre party given by a man, he
           should call within three days on the woman
           he escorted, or leave his card, and should
           call within a week on the remainder of his
           guests.

      MEN CALLING ON MEN. At the beginning of
           the season it is usual to leave a card for each
           member of a family called on--one card for
           husband, wife, "misses," and guest, or rest
           of the family. Sometimes two cards answer
           the purpose.

           They may be sent by mail or messenger.

      MEN CALLING ON WOMEN. A man should call
           only on "At Home" days, especially when
           making the first call, unless specially invited.
           He should call at the hour appointed.

           When no special day for receiving is indicated,
           calls may be made at any proper hour,
           according to the custom of the locality. Men
           of leisure may call at the fashionable hours
           --from two till five o'clock.

           Business and professional men may call
           between eight and nine o'clock, as their obligations
           prevent them from observing the
           fashionable hours.

           A business man may call in street dress
           before six o'clock, and the same dress in the
           evening, if intimately acquainted.

           Informal calls may be made on Sunday
           after three o'clock by business and professional
           men, provided there are no religious or
           other scruples on the part of those receiving
           the calls.

           Evening or other than mere formal calls
           should not be made, save by special invitation.

           The first call should last not longer than
           ten or fifteen minutes. It is correct to ask
           for all the women of the family.

           At the first call he should give his card at
           the door. At following calls it is optional
           whether to give a card or merely the name,
           asking at the same time for the person one
           desires to see. When the servant's intelligence
           seems doubtful, or the name is an
           unusual one, it is safer to give a card.

           When a woman invites a man to call without
           specifying when, it is not considered as
           an invitation at all, but merely as a formal
           courtesy.

           It is bad form to solicit by innuendo or
           otherwise an invitation to call from a woman.
           It is her privilege to make the first move in
           such matters; otherwise she would be placed
           in an embarrassing position.

           When an invitation specifies the hour,
           every effort should be made to be punctual.
           It is impolite to be too early or too late.

           At a formal call, when others are present,
           a man should not be seated unless invited to
           do so. He should leave as others come in,
           and not remain longer than ten or fifteen
           minutes.

           A man having a card or letter of introduction
           to a young woman should present it in
           person to the chaperone. If she is out, he
           should mail it to her, and she should at once
           notify him whether he may call.

           If a caller is a stranger to the young
           woman's hostess, he should send his card to
           the latter and ask to see her.

           The chaperone may, if desirable, give a
           man permission to call upon the woman
           under her charge.

           A man should not call upon an unmarried
           woman until invited by her to do so. He
           may ask a married woman who has a family
           for permission to call.

      GLOVES. Gloves need not be removed at a formal
           or brief call.

      ENTERTAINMENTS. At entertainments a man
           should give his card to the servant at the
           door or leave it in the hall.

           A few appropriate words of greeting should
           be addressed to the hostess and host as soon
           after entering as possible.

           Personal introductions are not absolutely
           required at musicales, teas, "At Homes," etc.
           One may converse with those nearest, but
           this does not warrant future recognition.

           When light repasts are served, as teas, ices,
           etc, a man should put his napkin on his
           knee and hold the plate in his hand.

           He should depart with as little ceremony
           as possible--a bow and a smile, if host and
           hostess are engaged, are sufficient. He
           should not shake hands and try to speak unless
           it can be done without becoming conspicuous.

      MEN CALLING ON WOMEN--HAT. A man making
           a formal or brief call should carry his
           hat in his hand into the parlor.

      SHAKING HANDS. A man should not offer to
           shake hands first, as that is the privilege of
           the women.

      MEN--DRESS. In making ceremonious calls, men
           wear afternoon dress, and after six o'clock
           evening dress.

             See also AFTERNOON DRESS--MEN. EVENING
             DRESS--MEN.

      PALL-BEARERS. See PALL-BEARERS--CALLS.

      THEATRE. See THEATRE--CALLS.

      USHERS. See USHERS--CALLS.

      WEDDING INVITATIONS. Very intimate friends
           can call personally. Friends of the groom
           who have no acquaintance with the bride's
           family should send their cards to those inviting
           them.

           Those who do not receive wedding invitations,
           announcement, or "At Home" cards
           should not call on the married couple, but
           consider themselves as dropped from their
           circle of acquaintance.

      WOMEN RECEIVING AND INVITING MEN. The
           invitation to call should be extended by the
           woman, and if she does not specify the time,
           will naturally be considered as an act of
           courtesy, but not as an invitation.

           These invitations should be given with great
           care by young women. It is better to have
           the invitation extended by her mother or
           chaperone.

           A married woman may ask a man to call,
           especially if she have unmarried daughters.
           An afternoon tea is an appropriate time to
           specify. A man may ask a married woman
           who has a family for permission to call.

           At the beginning of a season, a man who
           desires the further acquaintance of a woman
           should leave his card in person for all the
           members of the family.

           A formal call, or the first call of the season,
           should, mot last longer than ten or fifteen
           minutes. It is proper for the man to inquire
           for all the women of the family.

           A man should call only on "At Home"
           days, unless especially invited to come at
           other times. The hostess should be home on
           all "At Home" days, unless sickness or
           other good cause prevents.

           In the absence of "At Home" days, or
           specified time, calls may be received at any
           proper hour, according to the locality of the
           place.

           When men make a formal call at other than
           specified time, the hostess may justly excuse
           herself. The caller would have no ground
           for offense.

           Intimate friends need not hold to formal
           hours for paying calls.

           Men of leisure should call only at fashionable
           hours--from two to five in the afternoon.

           Evening calls should not be made by other
           than business or professional men, unless the
           acquaintance be an intimate one, or unless
           they are specially invited.

           Business and professional men may call between
           eight and nine o'clock, as their obligations
           prevent them from observing the fashionable
           hours.

           Informal calls may be made on Sunday
           after three o'clock by business and professional
           men, provided there are no religious or other
           scruples on the part of those receiving the
           calls.

           A business man may call in street dress
           before six o'clock in the evening, or thereafter
           if intimacy warrants.

           Evening, or other than mere formal calls,
           should not be made, save by special invitation.

           A man should leave his card when calling.
           If his hostess is married, he should leave
           one also for the host. If she is out, he
           should leave two.

           When calling upon a young woman whose
           hostess is not known to the man, he should
           send his card to her.

           If the woman is seated when a man enters
           the room, she rises to greet him, and, if
           she wishes, shakes hands. It is her option
           to shake hands or not, and she should make
           the first advances. It is bad form for him
           to do so.

           During a formal call, when other guests
           are present, a man should remain standing
           and depart upon the entrance of others. If
           the hostess is seated at the time, she need not
           rise or shake hands, but merely bow.

           The hostess should not accompany a caller
           to the door of the parlor, but bow from her
           chair.

           Dropping in at a theatre or opera party
           does not relieve a man from making formal
           calls that may be due.

           A woman's escort to a theatre party should
           call upon her within a week. If she were
           his guest, he should do so within three days,
           or send his card, with an apology.

           Business calls are privileged, and can be
           made when convenient, although preferably
           by appointment.

      WOMEN RECEIVING--INTRODUCTIONS. At formal
           calls conversation should be general among
           the guests. Introductions are unnecessary.

      AFTERNOON. See AFTERNOON CALLS.

      COUNTRY. See COUNTRY CALLS.

      EVENING. See EVENING CALLS.

      FIRST. See FIRST CALLS.

      INVALID'S. See INVALID'S CALLS.

      SUNDAY. See SUNDAY CALLS.

    CANCELING DINNERS. When it becomes necessary for
           a hostess to cancel or postpone a dinner, she
           should send as soon as possible, either by
           special delivery or messenger, a letter to each
           guest who has accepted the invitation. The
           letter, written either in the first or third person,
           should state the reason and express
           regrets.

    CANCELING WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS-INVITATIONS RECALLED.

    CANES. A cane is the correct thing for a man when
           walking, except when engaged in business.
           It should be held a few inches below the
           knob, ferrule down, and should, like umbrellas,
           be carried vertically.

      CALLING. When making a formal or brief call
        the cane should be left in the hall.

    CARDINAL-HOW ADDRESSED. A letter, official or
           social, begins: Your Eminence, and ends: I
           have the honor to remain your humble servant.
           The address on the envelope is: His Eminence
           Cardinal Wilson.

    CARDS.

      DEBUT. See DEBUT CARDS.

      DEBUTANTS. See DEBUTANTE CARDS.

      INFANT. See INFANT'S CARDS.

      IN MEMORIAM. See IN MEMORIAM CARDS.

      MOURNING. See MOURNING CARDS.

    CARDS, VISITING.

      ADDRESSING. See ADDRESSING CARDS (VISITING).

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See CARDS (VISITING), LEAVING
           IN PERSON--AFTERNOON TEAS. CARDS (VISITING),
           MAIL OR MESSENGER-AFTERNOON TEAS.

      AT HOME. See AT HOME-CARDS.

      BIRTH (ANNOUNCEMENT). See CARDS (VISITING),
           LEAVING IN PERSON--BIRTH.

      CONDOLENCE. See CONDOLENCE--CARDS.

      DAUGHTER. See DAUGHTERS--CARDS (VISITING).

      GARDEN PARTIES. See GARDEN PARTIES--CARDS.

      HUSBAND AND WIFE. When the wife is calling,
           she can leave cards of the husband and
           sons if it is impossible for them to do so
           themselves.

           After an entertainment, cards of the family
           can be left for the host and hostess by either
           the wife or any of the daughters.
           See Also MR. AND MRS. CARD.

      LEAVING IN PERSON. When cards with a message
           of congratulation are left in person,
           nothing should be written on it.

      LEAVING IN PERSON--AFTERNOON TEAS.
           Women leave cards of their male relatives
           as well as their own, although their names
           may be announced upon entering the drawing-room.
           Guests leave their cards in a receptacle
           provided, or give them to the servant
           at the door.

      MEN. A bachelor should not use AT HOME
           cards as a woman does, nor to invite his
           friends by writing a date and MUSIC AT FOUR
           on his calling card in place of an invitation.

      MEN--LEAVING IN PERSON. When returning
           to town after a long absence, a man should
           leave cards having his address.

           When calling upon a young woman whose
           hostess is not known by the man, he should
           send his card to her.

           At the beginning of a season, a man should
           leave two cards for all those whose entertainments
           he is in the habit of attending, or on
           whom he pays social calls. These cards
           may also be mailed. If left in person, there
           should be one for each member of the family
           called upon, or only two cards. In the
           former there should be left one card for the
           host, one for the hostess, one for the
           "misses," and one for the rest of the family
           and their guest.

           Men of leisure should leave their own
           cards, while business men can have them
           left by the women of the family.

           The corner of the card should not be
           turned down.

           Cards are now left in the hall by the servant
           and the caller is announced. In business
           calls the card is taken to the person for
           whom the caller asked.

           When calling, a man should leave a card
           whether the hostess is at home or not.

           P. P. C. card's may be left in person or
           sent by mail upon departure from city, or
           on leaving winter or summer resort.

           When a man calls upon a young woman
           whom a hostess is entertaining, he should
           leave cards for both.

           When a man calls upon another man, if he
           is not at home, he should leave a card.

           When a man calls on the hostess but not
           the host he should leave a card for him.
           If the hostess is out, he should leave two
           cards--one for each.

      BREAKFASTS, LUNCHEONS, DINNERS. A man
           should leave a card the day after a breakfast,
           luncheon, or dinner for the host and hostess,
           whether the invitation was accepted or not.
           They may also be sent by mail or messenger,
           with an apology for so doing.

      BALLS, SUBSCRIPTION. Shortly after receiving
           an invitation to a subscription ball, a man
           should leave a card for the patroness inviting
           him.

      DEBUTANTE. When calling upon a debutante a
           man should leave cards for her mother,
           whether the entertainment was attended or
           not.

      ENTERTAINMENT BY MEN. After a man's formal
           entertainment for men, a man should leave a
           card within one week, whether the event was
           attended or not. It can be sent by mail or
           messenger.

      RECEPTION. When the host and hostess receive
           together, a man should leave one card for
           both, and if not present at the reception, he
           should send two cards.

      THEATRE. After a theatre party given by a
           man, he should call within three days on the
           woman he escorted or leave his card.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. After a wedding reception
           a man should leave a card for the host
           and hostess, and another for the bridal
           couple.

             If a man has been invited to the church
           but not to the wedding reception, he should
           leave a card for the bride's parents and the
           bridal couple, or should mail a card.

      SENDING BY MAIL, OR MESSENGER. After an
           entertainment a man should call in person on
           host and hostess, whether the invitation was
           accepted or not. If a card is mailed or sent,
           it should be accompanied with an apology.

             At the beginning of the season a man
           should leave cards for all those whose entertainments
           he is in the habit of attending, or
           on whom he pays social calls. These cards
           may also be mailed. If left in person, there
           should be one for each member of the household
           or only two cards.

           In the former case, there should be left one
           card for the host, one for the hostess, one for
           the "misses," and one for the rest of the
           family and the guest.

           If a man is unable to make a formal call
           upon a debutante and her mother at her
           debut, he should send his card by mail or
           messenger.

           A man may mail his card to a woman
           engaged to be married, if acquaintance
           warrants.

           Visitors to town should send cards to every
           one whom they desire to see. The address
           should be written on them.

      AFTERNOON TEA. If a man is unable to be
           present at an afternoon tea, he should send a
           card the same afternoon.

      BREAKFASTS, LUNCHEONS, DINNERS. A man
           should leave a card the day after a breakfast,
           luncheon, or dinner for the host and hostess,
           whether the invitation was accepted or not.
           They may be sent by mail or messenger with
           an apology for so doing.

      ENTERTAINMENT BY MEN. After a man's formal
           entertainment for men, a man should leave a
           card within one week, whether the event was
           attended or not. It can be sent by mail or
           messenger.

           P. P. C. cards may be sent by mail or messenger
            upon departure from city, or on leaving
             winter or summer resort.

      RECEPTION. When the host and hostess receive
           together, a man should leave one card for
           both, and, if not present at the reception, he
           should send two cards.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. If a man has been invited
            to the church but not the wedding
           reception, he should leave or mail a card to
           the bride's parents, and also to the bridal
           couple.

      STYLE. The full name should be used, and if
           too long, the initials only. The club address
           is put in the lower left-hand corner, and if
           not living at a club, the home address should
           be in lower right-hand corner. In the absence
           of a title, Mr. is always used on an
           engraved but not a written card.

           Cards should be engraved in plain letter,
           according to prevailing fashion.

           Facsimile cards engraved are no longer
           used.

           Written cards are in bad taste, but in case
           of necessity they may be used. The name
           should be written in full if not too long, and
           should be the autograph of the sender.

           Messages or writing should not appear on
           men's cards. If address is changed, new
           cards should be engraved. In an emergency
           only the new address may be written.

      MOURNING CARDS are the same size as visiting-
           cards, and a black border is used--the width
           to be regulated by the relationship of the
           deceased relative.

      MEN--STYLE, TITLES. Men having titles use
           them before their names--as, Reverend, Rev.,
           Mr., Dr., Army and Navy titles, and officers
           on retired list. L.L.D. and all professional
           titles are placed after the name. Political
           and judicial titles are always omitted.

           Physicians may use Dr. before or M.D.
           after the name. On cards intended for social
           use, office hours and other professional
           matter are ommitted.

      MR. AND MRS. See MR. AND MRS. CARDS.

      P. P. C. See P. P. C. CARDS.

      SENDING BY MAIL OR MESSENGER. If after
           accepting an invitation it is necessary to
           decline, a card should be sent the evening of
           the entertainment, with an explanatory note
           the day following.

           When an invitation has been received to
           an "At Home" debut, and one has not been
           able to attend, cards should be sent by mail
           or messenger, to arrive at the time of the
           ceremony.

           A card should be mailed to a man engaged
           to be married.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. The invitations to a formal
           afternoon tea are sent a week or ten days in
           advance by mail or messenger. No reply is
           necessary, but if unable to be present, a card
           should be sent the day of the entertainment.

           For an afternoon tea a visiting-card may
           be used, with the hour for the "tea" written
           or engraved over the date beneath the fixed
           day of that week. They may be sent by mail
           or messenger.

           Persons unable to attend should send cards
           the same afternoon.

      BIRTH (ANNOUNCEMENT). If wishing to congratulate
           after a birth, cards should be left in
           person or sent by a messenger. Cut flowers
           may be sent with the card.

      CONDOLENCE. After a death in the family of
           an acquaintance, a card with the word
           Condolence written on it should be left in person or
           by messenger. For very intimate acquaintances,
           cut flowers may be left in person or
           sent, together with a card or letter.

           When unable to leave in person a card
           with Condolence written on it, send it to intimate
           friends only with a note of apology. If
           out of town, it should be sent with a letter of
           condolence.

      TRAVELERS. A woman visiting a place for a
           length of time should mail to her friends a
           visiting-card which contains her temporary
           address.

           A man in similar situation should call upon
           his friends, and if he does not find them at
           home, should leave his card.

      WEDDING INVITATIONS. Those present at the
           ceremony should leave cards for those inviting
           them, and if this is not possible, they can
           be sent by mail or messenger.

           Those invited but not present should send
           cards.

      WIDOW. See WIDOWS--CARDS.

      WIFE. Only the wife of the oldest member of
           the oldest branch may use her husband's
           name without the initials.

      WOMEN. Mrs. or Miss should always be used
           before the names. The cards of single
           women are smaller than those of married
           women.

           The husband's name should be used in
           full, unless too long, when the initials are
           used. Only the wife of the oldest member
           of the oldest branch may use her husband's
           name without initials.

           Reception days should appear in the lower
           left-hand corner, limiting dates--as, Until
           Lent, or in January, may be either engraved
           or written.

           If a special function is allotted to any
           reception days--as, the entertaining of special
           guests--the hour of the reception day may be
           written above the day and the date beneath it.

      DAUGHTERS. See DAUGHTERS--CARDS.

      LEAVING IN PERSON--BIRTH, ANNOUNCEMENT OF.
           If wishing to send congratulations,
           after receipt of a birth announcement card,
           cards should be left in person or sent by a
           messenger; cut flowers may be sent with the
           card.

           Before the wedding cards are issued, an
           engaged woman should leave her card
           personally upon her friends without entering the
           house.

           When calling at the beginning of the season
           a woman should leave her own card,
           those of the men of the family, and two of
           her husband's.

           After formal invitations, a woman should
           leave her own card and those of the men of
           the family who were invited, whether they
           attended or not.

           When calling formally a woman should
           leave a card, whether the hostess is at home
           or not.

           When a woman calls upon a well-known
           friend, it is not necessary to send up a card.

           When making a call at a hotel or other
           public place, the name of the person called
           upon should be written in the upper left-
           hand corner of the card--as:

           For Mrs. Jane Wilson

           The corner of the card should not be
           turned down.

           P. P. C. cards may be left in person or
           sent by mail upon departure from city, or
           on leaving winter or summer resort.

           The corner of the card should not be
           turned down.

      RECEPTION. At receptions a woman should
           leave the cards in the hall or hand them to
           the servant.

           At a "coming-out reception" a woman
           should leave cards for the mother and
           daughter.

           A married man returns his social obligations
           to women by personal calls, or his wife
           can do it for him by leaving his card with
           her own.

      MOTHER AND DAUGHTER. After her debut the
           younger of the two daughters has no card of
           her own, as her full baptismal name appears
           on her mother's card beneath her name. A
           year after her first appearance she may have
           a card of her own.

           When a mother leaves her daughter's card,
           it is for the hostess only.

           If reception day appear on the mother's
           card, the daughters also receive on that date,
           as the daughters have no reception days of
           their own.

      MOTHER AND SON. When a mother is calling,
           she can leave cards of her son for the host
           and hostess if it is impossible for him to do so
           himself.

           A son entering society can have his cards
           left by his mother upon a host and hostess.
           Invitations to entertainments will follow.

      RETURNING TO TOWN. Cards of the entire
           family should be sent by mail to all
           acquaintances when returning after a
           prolonged absence.

           When using cards, if out of town, the
           place of a woman's permanent residence can
           be written on the card--thus: New York.
           Philadelphia.

      SENDING BY MAIL OR MESSENGER. A woman
           visiting a place for a length of time should
           mail to her friends her visiting-card
           containing her temporary address.

           P. P. C. cards may be sent by mail or
           messenger upon departure from city, or
           on leaving winter or summer resort.

           After a change of residence the cards of
           the entire family should be sent out as soon
           as possible.

           At the beginning of the season both married
           and single women should send their cards
           to all their acquaintances.

           Visitors to town should send cards to every
           one whom they desire to see, with the address
           written on the cards.

           For afternoon tea a visiting-card may be
           used. The hour for the tea is written or
           engraved over, and the date beneath the fixed
           day of the week. They may be sent by mail
           or messenger.

           The cards of a debutante may be sent by
           mail or messenger.

           Mourning cards should be sent to indicate
           temporary retirement from society. Later
           cards should be sent to indicate return to
           society.

      AFTERNOON TEA. If a woman is unable to be
           present at an afternoon tea she should send
           her card the same afternoon.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. When invitations have
           been received to the church but not to the
           wedding reception, cards should be sent to
           the bride's parents and to the bridal couple.

      WOMEN--STYLE, TITLES. Women having titles
           should use them before the name--as,
           Reverend or Rev. Mrs. Smith. Physicians use Dr.
           before or M.D. after the name. Office hours
           and other professional matters are omitted on
           cards for social use. Husband's titles should
           never be used. The home address is put in
           the lower right-hand and the club address in
           the lower left-hand corner.

           The card of the eldest daughter in society
           is simply Miss Wilson.

    CARDS OF ADMISSION TO CHURCH WEDDINGS. These
           cards are used at all public weddings held in
           churches, and when they are used no one
           should be admitted to the church without
           one. They are sent with the wedding invitations.

    CARRIAGES.

      BALLS. See BALLS-CARRIAGES.

      DANCES. See DANCES-CARRIAGES.

      FUNERALS. See FUNERALS-CARRIAGES.

      MEN. In a general way a man should provide a
           carriage when escorting a woman in evening
           dress to any function. If she does not wear
           evening dress, and they are going to an informal
           affair, it would be proper to take a
           street-car.

      SUPPERS. See SUPPER AND THEATRE PARTIES--MEN--CARRIAGES.

      THEATRES. See THEATRES AND OPERA PARTIES GIVEN BY MEN--CARRIAGES.

      WOMEN. A woman accepting, with her mother's
           or chaperone's consent, a man's invitation to
           the theatre may, with propriety, request him
           not to provide a carriage unless full dress on
           her part is requested.

    CATHOLIC PRIEST--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Reverend and Dear Sir, and ends: I
           have the honor to remain your humble servant.
             A social letter begins: Dear Father Wilson,
           and ends: I beg to remain faithfully yours,
             The address on the envelope is: The Reverend
           John J. Wilson. But if he holds the
           degree of D.D. (Doctor of Divinity), the
           address is: Reverend John J. Wilson, D.D.,
           or Reverend Dr. John J. Wilson.

    CELERY is eaten with the fingers.

    CHANGE OF RESIDENCE. WOMEN. After a change of
           residence, the cards of the entire family
           should be sent out as soon as possible.

    CHAPERONE. A chaperone takes precedence of her
           charge in entering drawing or dancing rooms
           and on ceremonious occasions. At an entertainment
           both enter together, and the chaperone
           should introduce her protege to the
           hostess and to others. The two should remain
           together during the evening. In a
           general way the chaperon takes under her
           charge the social welfare of her protege.

      BALLS. A mother should attend balls with her
           daughters, going and returning with them,
           and if she is not invited, it is in good taste
           for the daughters to decline the invitation.
           A father can act as escort, if need be, instead
           of the mother. A mother can delegate her
           powers to some one else when requested to
           act as a chaperone.

      MEN CALLING. A man should ask the chaperone's
           permission to call upon her protege,
           and once it is granted no further permission
           is necessary. The chaperone should be present
           while a debutante receives male callers
           the first year, and when the first call is made
           she should be present throughout the evening
           and should decide as to the necessity
           of her presence during subsequent visits.

      CARDS. A chaperone introducing and accompanying
           young women should leave her own
           card with that of her protege.

      DANCES. The chaperone should give her
           permission to a man who desires to dance,
           promenade, or go to supper with her charge,
           who should not converse with him at length
           save at the chaperon's side, and the chaperon
           should accompany both to supper. If without
           an escort, the young woman may accept
           the invitation of her last partner before
           supper is announced.

      INTRODUCTIONS. A man should never be introduced
           direct by card or letter to a young
           unmarried woman. If he desires to be
           introduced, the letter or card of introduction
           should be addressed to her chaperone or
           mother, who may then introduce him to the
           young woman if she deems it advisable.

           At an entertainment a chaperone may ask
           a young man if he wishes to be introduced
           to the one under her care.

      LETTERS OF INTRODUCTION. A man having a
           letter of introduction to a young woman
           should present it in person to the chaperone.
           If the latter is out when he calls, he should
           mail it to her, and she may then notify him
           when he may call, and should herself be
           present.

      SUPPER, TEA, DINNER. A young woman receiving an
           invitation to a man's supper, tea,
           or dinner may accept if she has the consent
           of her mother or chaperone, and is assured
           that a chaperone will be present.

      THEATRES. A chaperone's permission should be
           asked before a man's invitation to the theatre
           can be accepted. The chaperone can also
           accept, on behalf of her protege, invitations
           from men to theatre parties or suppers,
           if she too is invited.

           The chaperone should be present at mixed
           theatre parties--one for small, and two or
           more for larger parties and suppers. The
           chaperones may use their own carriage to
           call for the guests, and then meet the men at
           the places of entertainment. The chaperone
           should say when the entertainment shall
           close.

      UNABLE TO BE PRESENT. When a chaperone
           is unable to fulfill her duties, she may delegate
           them to another, provided it is agreeable
           to all concerned.

    CHEESE is first cut into small bits, then placed on
           pieces of bread or cracker, and lifted by the
           fingers to the mouth.

    CHINA WEDDING. This is the twentieth wedding anniversary,
           and is not usually celebrated; but
           if it is, the invitation may bear the words
           NO PRESENTS RECEIVED, and congratulations may
           be extended in accepting or declining the
           invitation. An entertainment is usually
           provided for. Any article of china is appropriate
           as a gift.

    CHOIR-BOYS AT WEDDINGS. These form a brilliant
           addition to a church wedding, and when
           employed they meet the bridal party in the
           vestibule, and precede them to the altar,
           singing a hymn or other appropriate selection.

    CHRISTENING.

      DRESS. The mother wears an elaborate reception
           gown to the church, with white gloves and
           a light hat or bonnet.

           If the ceremony is at the house, she can
           wear an elaborate tea-gown.

           The guests wear afternoon or evening
           dress, according whether the ceremony comes
           before or after 6 P.M.

      FLOWERS. A christening ceremony offers a good
           opportunity for the guests who desire to
           present flowers to the mother. This is not
           obligatory, however, and must remain a
           matter of personal taste.

      GIFTS. A christening ceremony offers a good
           opportunity for the invited guests, if they
           desire, to send a present to the baby.

           These should be sent a day or two before
           the ceremony, and if of silver should be
           marked with the child's name, initials, or
           monogram.

      GUESTS. The invitations should be promptly
           answered.

           At a church ceremony the guests, as they
           are few in number, assemble in the front
           pews.

           At a large house christening the affair is
           conducted somewhat like an afternoon reception.
           Wine is drunk to the child's health,
           and the guests take leave of the hostess.

      INVITATIONS are issued by the wife only to intimate
           friends, and should be promptly answered.

           If the christening is made a formal entertainment,
           to take place in the drawing-room,
           the invitations may be engraved.

      MEN. If the ceremony is in the afternoon they
           wear afternoon dress, but at an evening
           affair evening dress.

           At an afternoon ceremony in the summer
           it is allowable for the men to wear straw
           hats and light flannel suits.

           At a large house christening the affair
           should be conducted somewhat like a reception,
           and men on departing should take leave
           of the hostess.

      WOMEN dress as they would for an afternoon reception
           if the ceremony comes in the afternoon, and if it comes
           after breakfast or luncheon, as they would for a breakfast
           or luncheon.

           At a large house christening the affair
           should be conducted like a reception, and
           women should take leave of the hostess on
           their departure.

      CHURCH. A man usually follows the woman, who
           leads to the pew, and he enters after her,
           closing the door as he does so.

           He should find the places in the service
           book for her.

           This same courtesy he should extend to a
           woman who is a stranger to him.

    CLERGYMAN.

      CHRISTENING FEES. It is customary to send a
           fee to the officiating clergyman, unless he is
           a relative or a near friend.

      EVENING DRESS. Custom permits a clergyman
           to wear his clerical dress at all functions at
           which other men wear evening dress; or,
           if he wishes, he may also wear the regulation
           full dress. The wearing of either is a matter
           of taste.

      HOW ADDRESSED. All mail and correspondence
           should be addressed to Rev. Mr. Smith, but
           in conversation a clergyman should be addressed
           as Mr. Smith. If he has received the degree of D.D.
           (Doctor of Divinity)from some educational institution,
           then he is addressed as Dr. Smith, and his mail should
           be addressed as Rev. Dr. Smith.

      WEDDING CEREMONY. The officiating clergyman (minister or priest)
           is selected by the bride, who usually chooses
           her family minister, and the latter is then called
           upon by the groom with regard to the details. If a
           very intimate friend or relative of the groom is a
           clergyman, it is in good taste for the bride to ask
           him either to officiate or to assist.
             If from any cause--as, living outside the State--the
           clergyman is unable to legally perform the ceremony,
           a magistrate should be present to legalize the ceremony,
           and should receive a fee.

      CARRIAGE. A carriage should be provided by
           the groom to take the clergyman to the
           church, then to the reception, and thence to
           his house.

      FEE. A fee should be paid the clergyman by
           the groom through the best man, who should
           hand it to him immediately after the ceremony.
           If two or three clergymen are present
           and assist, the fee of the officiating clergyman
           is double that of the others. The clergyman
           should receive at least five dollars in gold,
           clean bills, or check, in a sealed envelope,
           or more, in proportion to the groom's financial
           condition and social position.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. The clergyman should
           always be invited to the reception.

    CLUB.

      ADDRESS. If residing at a club, a man's visiting-
           card should have his club's name in the lower
           right-hand corner; if not, the name should
           be put in lower left-hand corner.

      STATIONERY. This is always in good form for
           social correspondence by men.

    COACHING. See DRIVING.

    COACHMAN-TIPS. It is customary when a guest
           leaves a house party after a visit to give the
           coachman a tip.

    COLLEGE DEGREES. Custom, good taste, and the fitness
           of things forbid a college man having engraved,
           on his visiting-card, his college degrees--as,
           A.B., A.M., etc.

    COMMERCE, Secretary of--How Addressed. An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, sir,
           the honor to remain your most obedient servant.
             A social letter begins: My dear Mr, Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain most sincerely
           yours.
           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of Commerce.

    COMMITTEES-PUBLIC BALLS. Public balls are conducted
           like private ones, and the etiquette is the
           same for the guests. The difference in their
           management is that, in place of a hostess, her
           functions and duties are filled by committees
           selected by the organization giving the ball.

    CONCLUSION OF A LETTER. The standard conclusions of
           letters are: I remain sincerely yours, or; Believe
           me faithfully yours.

           For business correspondence the standard
           conclusions are: Yours truly, or; Very truly yours.

           For relatives and dear friends the standard
           forms are: Affectionately yours, or; Devotedly yours.

           One should avoid signing a letter with only initials,
           Christian name, surnames, or diminutives.

      MEN. In writing formally on business to a
           woman he knows slightly, a man could say:
           I am respectfully yours. When not on business
           he could write: I beg to remain yours to command.

           He should avoid a signature like: J. Jones
           Wilson, but write: James J. Wilson

      WOMEN. In social correspondence a married woman should
           sign: Minnie Wilson, and not: Mrs. John Wilson.
           If she wants to make known in a business letter
           the fact of her being married, and may not know
           if the person addressed knows the fact, she may write:
              Minnie Wilson
              (Mrs. John Wilson)
           An unmarried woman would sign her name as:
           Minnie Wilson, and if wishing not to be taken
           for a widow would sign: Miss Minnie Wilson.

    CONDOLENCE.

      CALLS. When death occurs in the family of a friend,
           one should call in person and make kindly
           inquiries for the family and leave a card,
           but should not ask to see those in trouble
           unless a very near and dear acquaintanceship warrants.

           For a very intimate acquaintance, cut flowers
           may be left in person or sent, together
           with a card, unless the request has been made
           to send none.

      CARDS. A visiting-card is used with the word
           CONDOLENCE written on it, and should be left
           in person if possible, but may be sent or
           mailed to intimate friends only if accompanied
           by a note of apology. If out of town, it
           should be sent by mail with letter of condolence.

           A MR. and MRS. card may be used at any
           time for condolence, except for intimate
           friends.

      LETTERS. Only the most intimate and dear
           friends should send letters of condolence, and
           they may send flowers with the note unless
           the request has been made to send none.

    CONGRATULATIONS.

      BIRTH, ANNOUNCEMENT OF. If wishing to
           send congratulations after a birth, cards
           should be left in person or sent by messenger.
           Cut flowers may be sent with the card.

      CARDS. A MR. and MRS. card can be used at any
           time for congratulations. If left in person,
           which is preferable, the card should be accompanied
           by a kindly message, and, if sent
           by mail or messenger' the word CONGRATULATIONS
           should be written on it. Business and professional
           men are not required to make personal calls, and
           so may send their cards. A Mr. and Mrs. card can
           be used for all but near friends.

           When a card is left in person, with a message
           of congratulations, nothing should be
           written thereon.

           A man may mail his card to a woman engaged
           to be married, if acquaintance warrants
           the action.

           Congratulations upon the birth of a child
           may be expressed by a man to its father by
           sending a card with the word Congratulations
           written on it, or by leaving it in
           person.

           A card should be mailed to a man engaged
           to be married.

      WEDDINGS. Congratulations may be sent with
             letter of acceptance or declination to a wedding
             to those sending the invitations. And
             if acquaintance with bride and groom warrant,
             a note of congratulations may be sent to
             them also.

             Guests in personal conversation with the
             latter give best wishes to the bride and
             congratulations to the groom.

      WEDDING ANNIVERSARIES. In accepting or
             declining invitations to wedding anniversaries,
             congratulations may be extended.

    CONVERSATION AT DINNERS. Aim at bright and general
           conversation, avoiding all personalities and
           any subject that all cannot join in. This
           is largely determined by the character of the
           company. The guests should accommodate
           themselves to their surroundings.

    COOKS-TIPS. It is customary for men who have
           been guests at a house party when they
           leave to remember the cook by sending her
           a tip.

    CORN ON THE COB is eaten with the fingers of one hand.
           A good plan is to cut off the kernels and eat
           them with the aid of a fork.

    CORNER OF CARD TURNED DOWN. This is no longer
           done by persons when calling and leaving
           cards.

    CORRESPONDENCE. How to address official and social
           letters. See under title of person addressed
           --as, ARCHBISHOP, etc.

    COSTUME BALLS.--INVITATIONS. Invitations are similar
           to invitations to balls, except that they have
           in place of DANCING in the lower left-hand
           corner. COSTUME OF THE XVIIIth CENTURY, BAL
           MASQUE, OR BAL POUDRE.

    COTILLIONS. Germans are less formal than balls.
           Supper precedes the dancing. Those who
           do not dance or enjoy it can leave before
           that time.

           The etiquette is the same as for balls.

      DRESS. The regulation evening dress is worn.

      HOSTESS. The rules governing a hostess when
           giving a ball are the same for a cotillion,
           with this addition--that there should be an
           even number of men and women, and, failing
           this, more men than women.

           It is for the hostess to choose the leader
           of the cotillion, and to him are entrusted all
           its details.

           At the conclusion of the cotillion the hostess
           stands at the door with the leader at
           her side, to receive the greetings and the compliments
           of the guests.

           See also BALLS--HOSTESS.

      INVITATIONS. The invitations are engraved, and the
           hour for beginning is placed in the lower
           left-hand corner, and are sent out two weeks
           in advance. They may be sent in one envelope.

           Such invitations should be promptly accepted
           or declined.

    COTILIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS. These are given by leading
           society women, who subscribe to a fund
           sufficient to pay all expenses of the
           entertainment. They are usually held in some
           fashionable resort where suitable
           accommodations can be had.

           Guests are shown to the cloak-room, where
           attendants check their wraps.

           After the supper, the German, or cotillion,
           begins. Those not dancing in this generally
           retire. When leaving, guests should take
           leave especially of the patroness inviting
           them.

      DRESS. Full dress is worn by all.

      INVITATIONS. The patronesses whose names appear
           on the back of the cards are the subscribers.
           They send out the invitations to
           their friends. A presentation card, to be
           shown at the door, is sent with the invitation.

      MEN. Men wear evening dress.

           The men wait upon their partners and
           themselves at the table, the waiters assisting,
           unless small tables are used, when the
           patronesses sit by themselves, and others form
           groups as they like. The guests are served
           by the waiters, as at a dinner.

           When retiring, guests should take leave
           especially of the patroness inviting them.

      PATRONESSES. The patronesses stand in line to
           receive the guests, bowing or shaking hands
           as they prefer.

           When supper is announced, the leading
           patroness leads the way with her escort, the
           others following. If small tables are used,
           the patronesses sit by themselves.

      WOMEN. Women wear full dress.

           When guests depart, they should take
           leave especially of the patroness inviting
           them.

    COUNTESS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           Madam, and ends: I have the honor to
           remain your Ladyship's most obedient servant.
           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable The Countess of Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Kent,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Kent,
           sincerely yours.

           The address is: To the Countess of Kent.

    COUNTRY CALLS. The usual rule in calling is for the
           residents to call first upon the temporary
           cottage people, and between these latter the
           early comers call first upon those coming
           later.

           In the city there is no necessity for
           neighbors to call upon each other.

    CRACKERS should be broken into small pieces and
           eaten with the fingers.

    CRESTS. If men and women wish, these may be
           stamped in the latest fashionable colors on
           their stationery. It is not customary to use
           a crest and a stamped address on the same
           paper.

           The present fashion in crests is that they
           should be of small size.

           It is not usual to stamp the crest on the
           flap of the envelope.

           If sealing-wax is used, some dull color
           should be chosen.

           A person should avoid all individual
           eccentricities and oddities in stamping, such
           as facsimile autographs, etc.

    CRYSTAL WEDDINGS. This anniversary comes after
           fifteen years of married life, and the
           invitations may bear the words: No presents
           received, and on their acceptance or declination,
           congratulations may be extended. An
           entertainment should be provided for. Any
           article of crystal or glass is appropriate as a
           gift.

    D

    DANCES.

      CARRIAGES. A man should secure his carriage-check
           when leaving his carriage. It is safer
           to take wraps and coats to the house in case
           of accidents.

           When taking a woman wearing evening
           dress to a ball or dance, a man should pro-
           vide a carriage.

      DEBUTANTE. See DANCES--WOMEN--DEBUTANTE.

      DRESS. Evening dress is worn by men and
           women.

      DINNER INVITATIONS. The hostess issues two
           sets of invitations--one for those invited to
           both dinner and dance, and one for those
           invited to the dance only.

           For the former, the hostess should use her
           usual engraved dinner cards, with the written
           words: Dancing at eleven, and for the latter
           her usual engraved At Home cards, with the
           written words: Dancing at eleven.

           A less formal way is to use, instead of
           the At Home card, a Mr. and Mrs. card,
           or Mrs. And Miss card, with the following
           written in the lower left-hand corner:
           Dancing at ten. March the second. R. S. V. P.

      INVITATIONS. These should be acknowledged
           by an acceptance, or declined, with a note of
           regret within one week.

      MEN. ASKING A WOMAN TO DANCE. A man
           asks for the privilege of a dance, either with
           the daughter of the hostess or with any guest
           of the latter or any young woman receiving
           with her.

           On being introduced to a woman, he may
           ask her for a dance, and he should be prompt
           in keeping his appointment.

           It is her privilege to end the dance, and,
           when it is ended, he should conduct her to
           her chaperone, or, failing that, he should find
           her a seat--after which he is at perfect liberty
           to go elsewhere.

           If for any cause a man has to break his
           engagements to dance, he should personally
           explain the matter to every woman with
           whom he has an engagement and make a
           suitable apology.

      DEBUTANTE. At a debutante's reception the
           first partner is selected by the mother, usually
           the nearest and dearest friend, who
           dances but once, and the others follow.

      INVITATIONS. Invitations to balls or assemblies
           should be answered immediately; if declined,
           the ticket should be returned. A man should
           call or leave cards a few days before the
           affair.

      SUPPER. At balls and assemblies where small
           tables are provided, a man should not sit
           alone with his partner, but make up a party
           in advance, and keep together.

           If a patroness asks a man to sit at her
           table, she should provide a partner for him.

           At supper the senior patroness leads the
           way, escorted by the man honored for the
           occasion.

           If one large table is provided, the men,
           assisted by the waiters, serve the women.
           When small tables are used the patronesses
           generally sit by themselves, and the
           guests group themselves to their own satisfaction.

      TRONESSES. Their duties are varied and
           responsible--among them, the subscription to
           the expenses of the entertainments.

           The patronesses should be divided into
           various committees to attend to special duties
           --as, music, caterers, supper arrangements,
           the ball-room, and all other details.

           While affairs of this kind could be left in
           the hands of those employed to carry out the
           details, it is better and safer for each committee
           to follow the various matters out to the
           smallest details.

           Those devising new features and surprises
           for such an occasion will give the most successful ball.

           The one most active and having the best
           business ability should take the lead.

           Lists should be compared, in order to avoid
           duplicate invitations.

           The tickets should be divided among the
           patronesses, who, in turn, distribute them
           among their friends.

           The patronesses should be at the ball-room
           in ample time before the arrival of the guests,
           to see that all is in readiness.

           They should stand together beside the entrance
           to welcome the guests. They should
           see, as far as possible, that the proper introductions
           are made, and that every one is enjoying
           the evening, their own pleasure coming last.

           If time permits, a hasty introduction to
           the patroness beside her may be made by a
           patroness, but it should not be done if there
           is the slightest possibility of blocking up the
           entrance.

           A nod of recognition here and there, or a
           shake of the hands with some particular
           friend, is all that is necessary. Prolonged
           conversation should be avoided.

           A patroness should not worry over the
           affair, or leave anything to be done at the last
           minute. If she has to worry, she should
           not show it, lest she interfere with the pleasure
           of others.

           They should be the last to leave as well as
           the first to arrive, to see that the affair closes
           brilliantly.

      SUPPER. The senior patroness leads the way
           to supper, escorted by the man honored for
           the occasion.

           If one large table is provided, the men,
           assisted by the waiters, serve the women.
           When small tables are used, the patronesses
           generally sit by themselves, and the guests
           group themselves to their own satisfaction.

           If a patroness asks a man to sit at her
           table, she should provide a partner for him,
           and in case of a previous engagement, he
           should notify her by mail.

      WOMEN. A woman should always keep any engagement made,
           if possible. If, for a good
           reason, it is desired to break one, she should
           do so in ample time to enable the man to
           secure a partner.

           It is bad form to refuse one partner for a
           dance and to accept another for the same
           dance afterward. After refusing to dance, a
           woman should lose that dance unless previously engaged.

           A woman may refuse to dance at a public
           entertainment.

           A young woman chaperoned should not accept a man's invitation,
           unless he first asks
           permission of her chaperone.

           It is not good taste to keep late hours at an
           informal dance.

           In round dances the man supports the
           woman with his right arm around the waist,
           taking care not to hold her too closely. Her
           right hand is extended, held by his left hand,
           and her left hand is on his arm or shoulder,
           her head erect.

           When tired, the woman should indicate a
           desire to stop dancing.

           When the dancing ends, the woman takes
           her partner's arm and strolls about a few minutes.
           He then conducts her to her seat by
           her chaperone, and, after a few remarks, excuses himself.

           When supper is announced, and the young
           woman and her chaperone are in conversation
           with the man who danced with her last, they
           should accept his offer as escort if they are
           not already provided with one.

           If a woman is without escort when supper
           is announced, she must rely upon attendants
           or members of the host's family.

           At balls and assemblies where small tables
           are provided for the supper, the woman should
           not sit alone at a table with her partner, but
           she should have others present also.

      DEBUTANTE. At a debutante's reception the
           first partner is selected by the mother, usually
           the nearest and dearest friend, who dances
           but once with her, and the others follow.

    DANCES (FORMAL).

      HOST. When supper is announced, the host
           leads the way with his partner, followed by
           hostess and escort, the rest following.

      HOSTESS. She should limit the number of guests
           to the capacity of the house.

           Invitations should include more men than
           women, for some men may not attend, and
           of those who do come, some may not
           dance.

           An awning and carpet should be spread
           from curb to steps. The man stationed at
           the curb should open carriage doors for
           arriving and departing guests, distribute carriage-
           checks, and tell the drivers at what
           hour to return.

           The servant opening the door directs the
           guests to their respective dressing-rooms.

           A small orchestra should be provided and
           concealed behind palms or flowers.

           In the absence of polished floors, carpets
           should be covered with linen crash, tightly
           and securely laid, in order to stand the strain
           of dancing.

           Friends may assist in taking care of the
           guests, making introductions, etc.

      SUPPER. Supper may be served at one large
           table or many small ones, as desired.

      DANCES (INFORMAL). Dances of this character lack all
           possible formality. The invitations may be
           written or verbal.

           Piano music is all that is required, played
           by one of the family or a professional.

           Refreshments of a suitable nature are provided.

           See also Chaperone. Dances.

    DANCING.

      INTRODUCTIONS. The man must be introduced
           to the woman, and should ask her for the
           pleasure of a dance.

      MEN. A man should greet the host as soon as
           possible after seeing the hostess.

           At any function where patronesses are
           present, a man should bow to the one inviting him,
           and give her a few words of greeting.

           At balls all men should dance, and those
           who do not, have no place there, though
           invited.

           If a man comes alone and has no partner,
           he should seek hostess or assistants, and request
           an introduction to women who dance.

           After a dance a man should take a short
           stroll about the room with his partner before
           returning to her chaperone. Before retiring
           he may converse with her in general terms,
           from which he should have refrained previously.

           A man escorting one or more women
           should see that they are cared for when supper
           is announced.

           A man in conversation with a woman when
           supper is announced, if she is not engaged,
           may offer to take her into supper. Her
           chaperone should be invited at the same
           time.

           Introductions should be made as much as
           possible before the dancing begins.

           If introduced to a young woman, and she
           is free of engagement for the next dance, the
           man should invite her to dance.

           Before asking a chaperoned woman to
           dance, the man should ask permission of her
           chaperone.

           A man should pay especial attention to the
           women of the house, and invite them to
           dance as early as possible.

           A man should seek out those women who,
           for some reason, are neglected by selfish
           men, especially unmarried women, and invite
           them to dance.

           Men should keep engagements a few minutes
           before each dance.

           If for some good reason it is desired to
           break an engagement, it should be done so
           as to leave ample time for the other to secure
           a partner for that dance.

           In round dances, the man supports the
           woman with right arm about her waist, taking
           care not to hold her too closely. His left
           hand holds her right one, both extended.

           The woman should indicate when she desires
           to stop dancing.

           All persons should be at a formal dance
           not later than half an hour after the hour set.

           A man should secure his carriage-check.
           It is safer to take wraps and coats to the
           house in case of accidents.

      GLOVES. Gloves should be worn at formal
           dances, and should be put on before entering
           the room.

      SHAKING HANDS. It is not customary to shake
           hands at formal dances.

      SMOKING. Smoking should not be allowed in
           the dressing-room, but a special room should
           be provided. Men who dance should not
           smoke until leaving the house.

      WOMEN. The time for the formal dance is indicated
           on the invitation, and all should be
           there not later than half an hour after the
           time set.

           At private dances the maid takes and calls
           for the young woman in the absence of a male
           escort.

           Young women should be chaperoned at all
           formal dances by their mother or others.

           Introductions should be made as much as
           possible before the dancing begins.

    DAUGHTERS.

      CARDS. The card of the eldest daughter in
           society is simply Miss Wilson, and upon her
           death or marriage the card of the next
           daughter becomes the same. Where there
           are unmarried aunts and cousins having the
           father's name, only the eldest daughter of
           the eldest man can use the form Miss Wilson.

           If two or more sisters enter society at
           about the same time, their names may appear
           on their mother's card as The Misses Wilson.

           The name of the younger daughter should
           appear in full on her mother's card--as, Miss
           Mary Jane Wilson.

           Until the younger daughter has formally,
           made her debut, she visits only intimate
           friends of the family. After her debut she
           has no card, and her full baptismal name
           appears on her mother's card, beneath her
           name, and not until a year or two after her
           first appearance does she have a card of her
           own.

           When a mother leaves her daughter's card,
           it is for the hostess only.

           If reception days appear on the mother's
           card, the daughters also receive on that day,
           as they have no reception date of their
           own.

           After an entertainment the cards of the
           family may be left for the host and hostess
           by the eldest daughter.

           The eldest daughter has her own circle of
           acquaintances, and can visit and receive independently
           of her mother.

    DUTIES AT BALLS. See BALLS--DUTIES OF
             DAUGHTERS.

    DAUGHTER OF BARON--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain, Madam, your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, I remain sincerely yours.

           The envelope addressed to the eldest
           daughter reads: To the Honorable Miss Wilson,
           but to a younger daughter: To the
           Honorable Minnie Wilson.

    DAUGHTER OF DUKE--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very
           faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

    DAUGHTERS OF EARL--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very
           faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lady Jane F.
           Wilson.

    DAUGHTER OF MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain your Ladyship's most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lady Jane F. Wilson.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Jane,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Jane, very
           faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lady Jane F.
           Wilson.

    DAUGHTER OF VISCOUNT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain, madam, your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Miss Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, Miss Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The envelope addressed to the eldest
           daughter would read: To the Honorable Miss
           Wilson, but to a younger daughter: To the
           Honorable Minnie Wilson.

    DAYS AT HOME. Only very intimate persons should
           call on any other days than those named on
           an At Home card.

    DAY OF WEDDING. The wedding-day is named by
           the bride, and her mother's approval is asked
           by the groom.

    DEATH IN THE FAMILY. Cards, writing-paper, and envelopes
           should be bordered in black. The
           announcement of the death may be printed
           or engraved, preferably the latter. Full
           name of deceased, together with date of
           birth and death, and residence, should be
           given.

           The frequenting of places of amusements,
           entertainments, or social functions should
           not be indulged in for at least a year if in
           mourning for near relatives.

      CONDOLENCE. After a death in the family of an
           acquaintance, a card with the word Condolence
           written on it should be left in person
           or by messenger. For very intimate acquaintances,
           cut flowers may be left in person
           or sent, together with a card or letter, unless
           request has been made not to do so.

    DEBUTANTE. A debutante should make her debut between
           the ages of seventeen and twenty, and
           should not appear at any public function before
           her debut. She should be thoroughly
           versed in the laws of good society. She
           should be extremely cautious at all times in
           her dealings with men. She should follow,
           without reserve, the advice of mother or
           chaperone. She should avoid forwardness,
           and be quiet in manner and in speech. Men
           acquaintances should be carefully chosen, and
           great care exercised in accepting invitations
           from them.

      AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL). When a tea is
           given in honor of a debutante, she stands beside
           the hostess (usually her mother), and
           each guest is introduced to her. Flowers
           should be liberally provided, and friends may
           contribute on such an occasion.

           A debutante should not make any
           formal visits alone the first year, and should
           not receive men visitors unless her chaperone
           is present. Should a man call during
           the first season, and neither her mother
           nor her chaperone be present, she should decline
           the visit. She may make and receive
           visitors alone the second season.

           When calling upon a debutante, men and
           women should leave cards for her and her
           mother.

      CARDS. A debutante should use her mother's
           card with her name engraved under her
           mother's, but after a season she uses her own
           card. Personal cards should not be used
           during the first season. If she is the eldest
           unmarried daughter, her name is engraved
           (as, Miss A--) beneath her mother's name,
           but if there are other sisters, with the initials
           (as, Miss A. A--).

           The cards of a debutante may be sent by
           mail or messenger.

      DANCES. A debutante always receives with her
           mother standing by her side. A good order
           is for the mother to stand nearest the door,
           the debutante next, and the father last.

           It is a good plan for the debutante to ask
           a few of her girl friends to stand beside her
           the first half hour.

           The mother should introduce guests to her
           daughter, who may introduce them to her
           friends.

           The debutante shakes hands with each one
           introduced to her. She dances every dance,
           and at the end stands beside her mother to
           receive the greetings of the guests.

           The girls standing up with the debutante
           after the first hour are free to dance and enjoy
           themselves as they please without standing
           in line again.

      MEN. Her mother should select in advance the
           man who is to have the pleasure of the first
           dance with the debutante at her debut. No
           man should dance more than once with the
           debutante. If well acquainted with the
           family, a man may send flowers to a debutante
           at the time of her first debut. A man
           should make a formal call on mother and
           daughter a day or two after her debut, and,
           if unable to do so, he should send a card.

      DEBUT. When her mother receives visits after
           her debut, the daughter is included, and
           should be present. The mother should keep
           a complete record of the visits made by entering
           the cards in a book kept for that purpose.

      FLOWERS. Friends should send flowers to a debutante
           at a formal tea given in her honor.

      MEN. When calling upon a debutante, a man
           should leave cards for her and her mother,
           whether the entertainment was attended or
           not.

             See also DEBUTS.

    DEBUTS. A debut may be made at a dinner,
           reception, or ball. The debutante's card
           should be enclosed with the invitation, reading:
           Miss Wilson; or, if a younger daughter,
           Miss Minnie Wilson. For an "At
           Home" debut, the least formal of all these
           entertainments, the name of the debutante is
           engraved below that of her mother.

           The mother and elder unmarried sisters
           prior to the debut should call formally upon
           those whom they wish to invite to the ceremony.
           Cards of the family are left, including
           those of father and brothers.

      BALLS--INVITATIONS. When a young woman is
           to be introduced into society by a ball given
           in her honor, the parents may use a Mr. and
           Mrs. calling card, with the words added in
           writing: Dancing at ten o'clock, with card of
           the debutante enclosed.

           Or the parents may use a specially engraved
           invitation.

      CARDS, LEAVING. At the entertainments at a
           debut, as at a supper, cards should be left for
           the mother and daughter, and if guests are
           unable to be present, they should send them
           the day of the entertainment.

      ENTERTAINMENTS. Debuts may be an "At
           Home," supper, or dinner, the latter being
           more formal, and only intimate friends being
           invited. When making her debut, the debutante
           should stand beside her mother in the
           drawing-room, near the door, and be introduced
           by her. On formal occasions the
           father stands with them. The debutante
           may receive flowers from intimate friends
           only.

      AT HOMES. These are the least formal.

      SUPPERS OR DINNERS. If the debut takes the
           form of a supper or dinner, the brother takes
           in the debutante, and the father the most
           distinguished woman; or, if there is no
           brother, he takes in the debutante himself,
           and she is seated at his left hand. The
           mother is escorted by the most distinguished
           man.

           Should dancing follow, the mother should
           select the first partner, who dances but once,
           when others are at liberty to follow.

      GUESTS. Guests should offer congratulations to
           a debutante at her debut in a few well-chosen
           words, and also to the parents. A few
           moments of conversation with her only is admissible.

      INVITATIONS. Invitations are engraved, and
           should be sent by mail or messenger two
           weeks in advance, addressed to Mr. and Mrs.
           A, or Mrs. B, or The Misses A. While the
           invitations to a family may be enclosed in
           one envelope and sent to the principal one
           of the family, the son of the family should
           receive a separate invitation. Men should
           receive separate invitations and acknowledge
           them, in person.

           Acknowledgment is mot necessary for an
           "At Home" debut occurring in the afternoon,
           but would be for a formal one in the
           evening, for which special engraved invitations
           had been sent.

           If invitations for an afternoon "At Home"
           reception are accepted, cards should be left
           for mother and daughter. And, if not attending,
           cards should be sent by mail or
           messenger.

    DIAMOND WEDDINGS. These occur after seventy-
           five years of married life, and naturally are
           of very rare occurrence. If they are celebrated,
           the invitation may bear the words:
           NO PRESENTS RECEIVED, and congratulations
           may be extended in accepting or declining
           the invitation. An entertainment should be
           provided for. Any article of diamonds or
           precious stones is appropriate as a gift.

    DINNERS. If the circle of acquaintances is large,
           a series of dinners is necessary during the
           season.

           Dinners should begin at an hour between
           seven-thirty and eight-thirty.

           The dining-room should be bright and
           attractive, well lighted, and artistically decorated
           with flowers.

           The success of a dinner lies in the selection
           of the guests, with regard to their
           congeniality to each other, and their conversational
           powers and varying attainments. It
           is better to have a few at a time, perhaps
           eight, as a larger number is unmanageable.

      CALLS. Guests should call soon after the dinner.

      DRESS. Full dress is worn by both men and
           women.

      GUESTS. When guests are not congenial, or have
           dislikes, they should not show it, but appear
           as if the contrary were the case.

           Guests should be prompt in arriving at the
           hour named.

           At the table it is in good taste to accept
           whatever is offered, eating it or not, as one
           desires. Wines should be accepted, even if
           one does not partake of them. And if a toast
           is offered, a guest should recognize the courtesy
           by raising his glass.

           Conversing across the table is permissible,
           provided the distance does not require the
           voice to be unduly raised.

           When coffee is served in the drawing-room,
           young women serve, and the men hand it to
           the guests.

           When the men re-enter the drawing-room
           after the coffee, the guests should retire,
           unless some further entertainment follows.
           This is usually about eleven o'clock. When
           leaving, a guest should thank the host and
           hostess, making some agreeable and appropriate
           remark suitable to the occasion.

      HOST. When dinner is announced, the host
           offers his left arm to the woman he escorts.
           She may be the special invited guest, or the
           most prominent guest present.

           The signal for all to rise is given by the
           hostess, who bows to the woman on the host's
           right. The men escort the women to the
           door or drawing-room, after which they return,
           and cigars and liquors are offered.

           The host wears full dress.

      GUEST LATE. The host should always come
           forward to shake hands with the late-comer,
           and help him to find his seat, and do all in
           his power to make his late-coming quickly
           overlooked.

      HOSTESS. The hostess receives her guest at the
           parlor entrance.

           At table the guests should remain standing
           until all have found their places, when the
           host and hostess seat themselves, after which
           the others follow. The men should assist the
           women they escort before taking their own
           seats.

           At an informal dinner a hostess should introduce
           a man to the woman he is to escort
           to dinner, informing him whether he is to sit
           on the right or left hand of the host.

           When the dinner is announced the host
           with his escort leads the way, followed by the
           guests, and the hostess and her escort come
           last.

      GUEST LATE. The hostess should always bow
           and shake hands with a guest arriving late,
           but does not rise unless the guest is a woman.

      HOURS. Dinners begin from 7 to 8 P.M., and
           usually last from one hour to an hour and a
           half.

      INTRODUCTIONS. If a man is not acquainted with
            the woman assigned to him, the hostess
            should introduce him to the woman.

      INVITATIONS. These should be acknowledged
           immediately by a letter of acceptance, or declining
           with regret.

           The invitations are given in the name of
           husband and wife, and should be sent out
           two or four weeks in advance. R. S. V. P.
           is not used, and they should be answered
           immediately.

           Invitations to a dinner in honor of a special
           guest are engraved, and state this fact. If
           for good reasons there is not sufficient time
           to engrave, an ordinary invitation may be
           used, and a visiting-card enclosed, upon which
           is written: To meet Miss Wilson.

           For ceremonious dinners, cards may be engraved,
           with place for guest's name left blank
           and filled in by hand.

           When frequent dinners are given, invitations
           may be engraved, with blanks to be
           filled with dates, etc.

           Written invitations are also proper to indicate
           an unceremonious dinner. Note sheets
           can be used.

      HUSBAND AND WIFE. Both the husband and
           wife should always be invited to a dinner.

           When a husband and wife are invited to
           dinner, and the former does not accept, the
           wife should decline, giving her reason. The
           hostess can then invite the wife only, who
           may accept.

      MEN. Full dress is necessary for all except informal
           dinners.

           The man at the door, after asking the
           guest's name, hands him an envelope, with
           his name upon it, enclosing a card with the
           name of the woman he is to escort to dinner;
           or these envelopes may be in the dressing-
           rooms, if preferred. It will also be designated
           at which side of the table (right or
           left) a man is to sit; or a diagram of the
           table, with the names of the guests, should
           be hung in each dressing-room. The guests
           pair off as indicated.

           As soon as possible a man should seek the
           woman assigned to him, and inform her that
           he will be pleased to act as her escort, disguising
           any personal preference he may have
           otherwise.

           He should offer his left arm when escorting
           her to dinner.

           When the dinner is announced, the host
           leads the way with the woman he escorts,
           and the rest follow. To avoid confusion, a
           man should remember on which side of the
           table he is to sit, his place being indicated by
           a dinner card.

           If unacquainted with the woman a man is
           to escort to dinner, he should seek an introduction
           from the hostess.

           When the women rise to leave, the men
           rise and remain standing until the women
           leave the dining-room, or they may accompany
           them to the drawing-room, and then
           return for coffee and cigars. They should
           not remain longer than half an hour.

      LEAVING CARDS. After a dinner a man should
           leave a card for host and hostess, whether
           the invitation was accepted or not; or it
           may be sent by mail or messenger, with an
           apology for so doing.

      PRECEDENCE. The host offers his right arm to
           the woman who is the guest, or the most distinguished
           woman, or the eldest, or the one
           invited for the first time. If the dinner is
           given in honor of a married couple, the host
           would take in the wife, and the husband
           would accompany the hostess, who comes
           last in the procession into the dining-room.

           It is a fixed rule that relatives, or husbands
           and wives, are never seated together.

           If possible, there should be an equal number
           of men and women, and if the latter outnumber
           the former, the hostess enters alone.

      SECOND HELPING. At formal dinner parties,
           luncheons, and breakfasts, second helpings
           are never offered by the host or hostess, and
           should not be asked for by the guests. This
           is only permissible at a small dinner party
           or at the daily family meal.

           Of course, this does not apply to a second
           glass of water for which the guest might ask,
           or for wine, for which the butler should keep
           a good lookout.

      TABLE ETIQUETTE. See TABLE ETIQUETTE.

      WOMEN. When wraps have been removed, and
           the woman leaves the dressing-room, the escort
           chosen by the hostess approaches and makes
           known the fact, accompanying her to the
           table. If the escort is not thoroughly agreeable
           to the woman, she should conceal the
           fact.

           At the conclusion of a dinner the hostess rises
           and the women follow, leaving their napkins
           unfolded. They retire to the drawing-room,
           while the men remain for coffee and cigars.
           If the men prefer, they may escort them to
           the drawing-room, where they bow and return.

      GLOVES. Women may remove their gloves at
           table, and it is not necessary to replace them.
           They should be laid in the lap. The hostess
           generally determines whether the women
           should resume their gloves or not by her own
           actions.

           Full dress is worn.

      GIVEN BY MEN--WOMEN. A young woman may
           accept a man's invitation, provided she has
           the consent of her mother or guardian, and
           is assured that there will be present a chaperone.

      GIVEN BY BACHELORS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS.

    DINNER DANCE.

      INVITATIONS. The hostess issues two sets of
           invitations--one for those invited to both the
           dinner and the dance, and one for those invited
           to the dance only.

           For the former she could use her usual
           engraved dinner cards with the words: Dancing
           at eleven, and for the latter her usual
           engraved At Home cards with the words:
           Dancing at eleven.

           A less formal way for the latter invitation
           is to use the Mr. and Mrs. card or Mrs. and
           Miss card, and to write on it in the lower left
           hand corner: Dancing at ten, February the
           tenth.

    DOCTOR--HOW ADDRESSED. A doctor or physician
           should be addressed as Dr. both by correspondence
           and in conversation.

           This title of Dr. must not be confounded
           with the honorary degree of Doctor of Divinity,
           conferred upon clergymen by educational
           institutions, and the degree of Doctor of
           Philosophy, conferred upon college professors
           after certain conditions of study have been
           complied with.

    DOWAGER DUCHESS. See DUCHESS, DOWAGER.

    DOWAGER MARCHIONESS. See MARCHIONESS, DOWAGER.

    DRESS.

      AFTERNOON. See AFTERNOON--DRESS.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS--DRESS.

      AT HOMES. See AT HOMES--DRESS.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS. See BACHELOR'S DINNERS--
           DRESS.

      BACHELORS' TEAS. See BACHELOR'S TEAS--DRESS.

      BALLS. See BALLS--DRESS.

      BREAKFASTS. See BREAKFASTS--DRESS.

      CHRISTENINGS. See CHRISTENING--DRESS.

      COTILLIONS. See COTILLIONS--DRESS.

      COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS. See COTILLIONS
           BY SUBSCRIPTIONS--DRESS.

      DANCES. See DANCES--DRESS.

      DINNERS. See DINNERS--DRESS.

      EVENING. See EVENING DRESS.

      GARDEN PARTIES. See GARDEN PARTIES--DRESS.

      HIGH TEAS. See HIGHT TEAS--DRESS.

      HOUSE PARTIES. See HOUSE PARTIES--DRESS.

      LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEONS--DRESS.

      MATINEES. See MATINEES--DRESS.

      MUSICALES. See MUSICALES--DRESS.

      THEATRES. See THEATRES--DRESS.

      WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS--DRESS.

    DRESS--MEN AND WOMEN. For particulars as to dress
           at different functions, see each entertainment
           --as, Balls, Dinners, At Homes, Theatres,
           Breakfasts, etc.

    DRESS--WOMEN.

      BRIDE. See BRIDE--DRESS.

      BRIDESMAIDS. See BRIDESMAIDS--DRESS.

      CALLS. See CALLS--WOMEN--DRESS.

      FUNERALS. See FUNERALS--WOMEN--DRESS.

      MAID OF HONOR. See MAIDOF HONOR--DRESS.

      MOURNING. See MOURNING--DRESS, WOMEN.

      DRESSING-ROOMS. At all entertainments,
           dressing-rooms should be provided for both
           the men and for the women, with suitable
           attendants, where all outer wraps, coats, over-
           shoes, etc., should be left.

    DRIVING

      MEN. When driving with a woman, a man should
           be careful that the carriage is well drawn up
           to the steps, and that she be given time in
           which to comfortably seat herself before he
           begins to drive.

           A man when driving with a woman should
           refrain from asking her permission to smoke,
           and, of course, would never do so without her
           permission.

           He should be careful to lift his hat as if he
           were on the street, and if this is not possible,
           to touch it with the whip in place of a bow.

           The host of a coaching party, if he is also
           the whip, would give the chaperone the seat
           on the box at the left of his, unless he wished
           that seat to be occupied by some special young
           woman. The person occupying this seat
           should always be helped by the host to climb
           to her place.

           It is customary when the coach is a high
           one to seat a woman between two men, and
           they would ascend and descend in the order
           in which they were seated.

           Even if the woman asks a man to drive with
           her, he should help her to her seat, and be
           ready to step down when a halt is made to
           assist her to alight.

           It is not customary when a woman has
           asked a man to drive with her for her to call
           for him at his club or home, but to meet him
           at her house.

      DRESS. The whip wears a gray suit with a gray
           high hat and gray gloves, with a white silk
           tie and white linen. But in summer this costume
           is often made lighter and more comfortable
           to suit the weather, and a straw hat
           or panama, with flannel trousers and dark
           serge sacque coat, would be in good taste.

           There are no hard and fast rules governing
           the dress of men when driving.

      WOMEN. The etiquette in general is the same
           for a woman as for a man.

           When a woman asks a man or a male relative
           to drive with her, she does not call for
           him, but meets him at her door. Even if a
           groom is present, he should help her to
           mount to her seat, and at the proper time
           descend before her and help her to alight.

    DUCHESS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           Madam, may it please Your Grace, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain your Grace's obedient
           servant.

           A social letter begins: My Dear Duchess of
           Kent, and ends: Believe me, dear Duchess,
           yours very truly.

           The address on the envelope is: To Her
           Grace, The Duchess of Kent.

    DUCHESS, DOWAGER--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: May it please YOUR Grace, and
           ends: I have the honor to remain your Graces's
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Duchess
           Of Kent, and ends: Believe me, dear Duchess,
           yours very truly.

           The address on the envelope is: To Her
           Grace, The Dowager Duchess of Kent, or, To
           Her Grace, Minnie, Duchess of Kent.

    DUKE--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           My Lord Duke, may it please your grace, and
           ends: I have the honor to be your grace's most
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Duke of
           Kent, and ends: believe me, dear Duke, your
           Grace's very faithfully.

           The address on the envelope is: To His
           Grace, The Duke of Kent.

      DAUGHTER OF. See Daughter of Duke.

      WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF. See Wife of
           Younger Son of Duke.

      YOUNGER SON OF. See Son (Younger) of Duke.

    E

    EARL--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           My Lord, and ends: I have the honor to be
           your lordship's obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable The Earl Of Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lord Kent,
           and ends: Believe me my dear Lord Kent,
           very sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Earl of Kent

      DAUGHTER OF. See Daughter of Earl.

      WIFE OF YOUNGER SON. See Wife of Younger
           Son of Earl.

      YOUNGER SON OF. See Son (Younger) of Earl.

    EGGS are usually broken into a glass and eaten with
           a spoon.

    ELEVATOR. Men should remove their hats when
           riding in an elevator with women, although
           it is held by some that an elevator is as much
           a public conveyance as a car, and this act of
           courtesy as unnecessary in the one place as
           in the other. Women enter and leave before
           men.

    ENGAGEMENT.

      MEN It is his duty to see the woman's parents
           or guardian, and to make known his
           intentions, and to tell them fully and frankly
           about himself, his family, his social position,
           and business prospects. He should court the
           fullest investigation, and take his own family
           into his confidence, but not mention it to
           others.

      PARENTS OF MAN. They should send their
           pleasant greetings and congratulations,
           accompanied with flowers, and if both families
           are old acquaintances, a present may be sent
           to the prospective bride.

      PARENTS OF WOMAN. The first step is to bring
           together both parents in social intercourse--
           as, by a dinner given by the man's or woman's
           family, when friends may be invited, by
           interchange of notes and congratulations, by
           any social visit, or by any function that good
           taste may dictate.

           If one family lives out of town, it may
           invite various members of the other family
           living in the city to make visits of some
           duration, as a week or more. These visits should
           be returned.

      PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT. This item of news is
           rarely published in the papers, but if it is,
           the expense is borne by the family of the
           woman. The public announcement is usually
           made at some social entertainment--as, a
           dinner, tea, or an "At Home," given by either
           family.

           At a formal dinner given by the family of
           the woman, the father takes out his daughter
           first and her fiance escorts her mother. At
           the proper time the father drinks his future
           son-in-law's health and announces the
           engagement. All rise, and congratulations
           follow.

           Notes may be written to intimate friends
           informing them of the happy event.

      WOMEN. A woman should at once confide in
           her parents, and trust to their future
           guidance and to their making a full investigation
           of the man, his social condition, and business
           prospects. They should not mention the
           matter to others.

           Immediately after the engagement, each of
           the two parties should be introduced to the
           family of the other party. Before the wedding-cards
           are issued the woman should leave her
           card personally at the homes of her friends,
           but without entering. After the wedding-cards
           are issued she should not appear at any
           social function, or make any personal visits,
           or be seen at any place of amusement.

           It is not wise for her to call at the place of
           business of her fiance, and if a meeting is
           necessary, it is better to make an appointment
           elsewhere.

      RING. The ring is given by the man immediately
           after the announcement of the engagement
           to the woman, who wears it on the third finger
           of her left hand. It should be a small and
           unostentatious one. Diamonds, rubies,
           moonstones, sapphires, and other precious stones
           may be used.

           He may ask the woman to aid him in the
           selection, but it is better for him to make the
           selection alone. The woman may give the
           man an engagement ring or a gift if she
           wishes.

    ENTERTAINMENTS--CALLS AFTER. See CALLS--MEN--AFTER
           ENTERTAINMENTS.

    ENVELOPES, ADDRESSING. See ADDRESSING ENVELOPES.

    ESQUIRE. Either ESQ. or MR. may be used in
           addressing a letter, but never the two at the
           same time.

    EVENING CALLS. When no special day for receiving
           is indicated, calls may be made at any proper
           hour, according to the custom of the locality.
           Men of leisure may call at the fashionable
           hours, from two till five o'clock in the
           afternoon, while business and professional men
           may call between eight and nine in the
           evening, as their obligations prevent them from
           observing the fashionable hours.

    EVENING DRESS.

      Men. Evening dress should be worn on all
           formal occasions, consisting of the swallow-
           tail coat of black material, made in the
           prevailing fashion, with waistcoat and trousers
           of the same material; or a white vest may
           be worn.

           The linen must be white. Studs or shirt-
           buttons may be worn, according to fashion.
           The collar should be high, and the cravat
           white. Low patent-leather shoes and white
           kid gloves complete the costume.

           Evening dress should be worn at all formal
           functions after six o'clock--as, balls, dinners,
           suppers, receptions, germans, formal
           stag parties, theatre, opera, and fashionable
           evening calls where women are present.

           The phrase, "evening dress," is now used
           in place of full dress.

           A Tuxedo should never be worn when
           women are present.

             See also TUXEDO. CLERGYMAN--EVENING
             DRESS.

      WEDDINGS, EVENING. Full evening dress is
           worn by the groom and ushers. Guests are
           likewise in evening dress.

      CLERGYMAN. Custom permits a clergyman to
           wear his clerical dress at all functions where
           other men wear evening dress, or he may
           wear evening dress.

    EVENING RECEPTIONS. The etiquette is the same as
           for an afternoon tea (formal), save that no
           cards are left by the guests, and that they
           wear evening dress.

             See AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL).

    F

    FACSIMILE CARDS, engraved, are no longer used.

    FAMILY OF BRIDE. The family, except the father,
           leave the house first, then the bridesmaids,
           the maid of honor with the mother, and last
           the bride with her father or nearest male
           relative. At church the family is seated by the
           ushers.

           At the conclusion of the ceremony they are
           the first to be escorted from their pew and to
           take their carriage for the wedding reception
           or breakfast.

    WEDDING BREAKFAST. The bride's father or
           her nearest male relative takes in the groom's
           mother, and the bride's mother, as hostess, is
           taken in by the groom's father.

    WEDDING RECEPTION. The parents of both
           bride and groom stand up with the married
           couple, and are introduced to the guests.

    FAMILY OF GROOM. At the church the family and
           relatives of the groom are seated on one side,
           while the family of the bride and her
           relatives are seated on the other.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The groom's mother is
           taken in by the bride's father, and the groom's
           father takes in the bride's mother, who,
           acting as hostess, comes last.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. The parents of both
           bride and groom stand up with the married
           couple, and are introduced to the guests.

    FAREWELL BACHELOR DINNER. See BACHELOR'S FAREWELL
           DINNERS.

    FAREWELL BRIDAL LUNCHEON. See BRIDE--FAREWELL
           LUNCHEON.

    FATHER OF BRIDE.

      DEBUTS. When the debut is a formal one, he
           stands beside his wife and daughter, and
           receives the congratulations of the guests. At
           a supper or dinner he escorts the most
           distinguished woman. If there is no brother to
           escort the debutante, he does so, and she is
           seated at his left hand.

      DINNER, ENGAGEMENT. At a formal dinner
           given by the family of the engaged woman
           the father takes out his daughter first and
           her fiance escorts her mother. At the proper
           time the father drinks to the health of his
           future son-in-law, and announces the
           engagement. All rise, and congratulations follow.

           He wears evening dress.

           The father of the bride, or her nearest
           male relative, drives to the church with her,
           and is there received by the ushers and
           bridesmaids, and escorts her in the
           procession up the aisle.

           After the procession has arrived at the
           chancel and the groom comes forward to
           take the bride's hand, he steps back a little
           way and waits for the clergyman's words:
           "Who giveth this woman away?" He
           then places the bride's right hand in that of
           the clergyman, and retires to his seat in the
           pew with his family.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. He takes in the mother
           of the groom, following the ushers and the
           maids of honor.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. He escorts the groom's
           mother, and receives with the married couple.

    FATHER OF GROOM. At a wedding breakfast he should
           take in the mother of the bride, and at a
           wedding reception he receives with the bride
           and groom.

           At a church wedding he is, of course, given
           a front seat among those reserved for the
           groom's family.

           He should wear afternoon dress for an
           afternoon wedding, and evening dress at an
           evening wedding.

    FEES.

      CHRISTENING. See CHRISTENING--FEES

      WEDDING. The wedding fee, preferably gold or
           clean bills in sealed envelope, is given by the
           best man to the officiating clergyman. Custom
           leaves the amount to the groom, who
           should give at least five dollars or more, in
           proportion to his income and social position.
           The clergyman usually gives the fee to his
           wife.

           A fee should also be paid to the sexton and
           the organist

    FIANCE, MOURNING FOR. In the event of the death
           of a woman's betrothed shortly before the
           date of the wedding, she may wear black for
           a short period or full mourning for a year.

    FINGER-BOWL. The fingers should be dipped in the
           water and gently rubbed together, and dried
           on the napkins.

    FIRST CALLS. Newcomers and brides are called upon
           first.

           After a country visit, the visitor should call
           first upon the hostess when the latter returns
           to town.

           Other things being equal, the younger or
           unmarried woman calls first upon the older
           or married woman.

           A woman returning to town before another
           one would make the first call.

           If one woman issues her AT HOME card
           before another, she should receive the first
           call.

    FISH should be eaten with a fork held in the right
           hand and a piece of bread held in the left hand.
           The bones should be removed from the
           mouth with the aid of a fork or with the
           fingers. If by the latter, great delicacy
           should be used.

    FLOWER GIRL. The flower girls--one or two, as may
           be the case--follow the maid of honor up the
           isle and strew flowers in the path of the
           bride, who follows after.

           In the procession down the isle they should
           follow the bride.

           Flower girls and pages are not used now
           as much as formerly.

    FLOWERS. Between friends, flowers may be sent as
           an expression of sympathy in either joy or
           sorrow.

      BIRTH, ANNOUNCEMENT OF. If wishing to send
           congratulations after a birth, cards should be
           left in person or sent by a messenger. Cut
           flowers may be sent with the card.

      BRIDE. If she wishes, a bride may present flowers
           to her bridesmaids, and also to the best
           man and ushers.

      CHRISTENING. A christening ceremony offers a
           good opportunity for the guests who desire
           to present flowers to the mother. This is
           not obligatory, however, and must remain a
           matter of personal taste.

      CONDOLENCE CALLS. When making a condolence
           call upon a very intimate friend, cut
           flowers may be left in person or sent,
           together with a card, unless request has been
           made to send none.

      DEBUTANTE. Friends should send flowers to a
           debutante at a formal tea given in her honor.

      ENGAGEMENT. Flowers should accompany the
           greetings from the parents of the man to the
           parents of the woman.

      FUNERALS. See FUNERALS--FLOWERS.

      GROOM. He pays for the bridal bouquet carried
           by the bride at the wedding ceremony, and, if
           he wishes, for the bouquets carried by the
           bridesmaids.

      MEN. If well acquainted with a debutante's
           family, a man may send her flowers at the
           time of her debut.

           After a slightly intimate acquaintance, a
           man can present flowers to a young
           unmarried woman as a token of sympathy either of
           joy or sorrow.

           It is not usual for a man to send flowers to
           a woman who is a mere acquaintance.

      BALLS. It is permissible for a man, if he wishes,
           to send flowers to a woman he is to escort to
           a ball.

      THEATRE OR OPERA. It is permissible, but not
           necessary, for a man to send flowers to the
           woman he is to take to the theatre or to the
           opera.

      WEDDING TRIP. The best man should arrange
           beforehand all the details of the trip--such as
           the tickets, parlor-car, flowers, baggage, etc.

      PALL-BEARERS. See PALL-BEARERS--FLOWERS.

    FORK AND KNIFE. See KNIFE AND FORK.

    FORMAL AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL).

    FORMAL DANCES. See DANCES (FORMAL).

    FRUIT. All raw fruit, except melons, berries, and
           grapefruit, are eaten with the fingers.
           Canned fruits are eaten with a spoon.

    FULL DRESS. This phrase is now no longer in good
           usage, and instead should be used the term:
           "Evening Dress," which SEE.

    FUNERALS. A member of the family, or very near
           relative, should take charge of the ceremony
           and direct the undertaker. A large funeral
           should be avoided, and the ceremony confined
           to the immediate family and nearest relatives,
           and, if possible, the service should be at the
           church.

           All the details of the funeral should be
           carefully considered and carried out, with the
           ceremony started at the hour set, and with
           all appearance of confusion avoided.

           It is not now customary to watch by the
           dead at night.

           Funerals should be private, and only those
           intimately interested should be invited.

      CARRIAGES. A carriage should always be
           provided to call for the clergyman and to take
           him from the church or cemetery back to his
           house. Carriages should also be provided to
           take the friends, mourners, and pall-bearers
           from the house to the church, and then to the
           cemetery and return. These are provided by
           the family.

      DRESS. See FUNERALS--MEN.

      EXPENSES. Though it is not customary for
           the clergyman in Protestant churches to
           expect or to receive fees for conducting funerals,
           yet it is in perfectly good taste to offer him a
           fee. In the Roman Catholic Church the rate
           of fees for funerals is fixed. There are,
           besides, fees for the sexton, the organist, and the
           singers.

      FLOWERS. The family, in publishing notice of
           funeral, may add: "Kindly omit flowers."
           However, in the absence of such a notice,
           at the public funerals of prominent persons
           elaborate designs may be sent. But at a
           private funeral, if flowers are sent, they
           should be choice and delicate.

           The custom is growing of having fewer
           flowers, and it is no longer in good taste to
           have a carriage in the procession carrying
           flowers and set pieces. A good use of the
           large set pieces is to send them afterward to
           the hospitals.

           If any flowers are laid upon the grave
           they should be those given by the nearest
           relatives.

      INVITATIONS. A church funeral can be attended
           by any one, friend or acquaintance, and no
           slight should be felt at the non-receipt of an
           invitation. Those attending should take
           especial pains to be in the church before the
           funeral procession arrives, and that they do
           nothing to distract from the solemnity of the
           occasion.

           Notice of death and date of funeral may be
           printed on heavy bordered cards, or on
           mourning paper, and sent to friends.
           Sometimes a notice is written and sent to most
           intimate friends.

      MEN--DRESS. A man should wear either a black
           frock coat or a black cutaway, with the
           necktie, gloves, and other parts of the dress as
           subdued as possible. Under no conditions
           should light ties or light-colored linen be
           worn.

      PALL-BEARERS. See PALL-BEARERS.

      PRECEDENCE. At a church funeral the parents,
           arm in arm, follow the body of their child,
           and the children come next in the order of
           their age.

           A widow, leaning on the arm of her eldest
           son, follows the body of her husband, and
           the other children come after.

           A widower, attended by his eldest daughter
           or son, follows the body of his wife, and the
           children come after.

           The elder children always precede the
           younger. The pall-bearers are seated at the
           left of the main isle, and the near relatives
           at the right.

      PUBLIC NOTICE. When the date of the funeral
           has been determined upon, notice should be
           published in the papers, giving date, place,
           and time of funeral--also date of birth and
           late place of residence of deceased. Such
           announcement may contain notice that
           the interment is private, and also the words:
           "Kindly omit flowers."

           A notice of death and date of funeral may
           be printed on heavy bordered cards or mourning
           paper, and sent to friends. Sometimes
           a notice is written and sent to most intimate
           friends.

      CHURCH. The pall-bearers and the nearest relatives
           meet at the house. At the appointed
           hour the procession leaves the house, the
           casket borne on the shoulders of the undertaker's
           assistants, followed by the pall-bearers,
           relatives, and friends.

           The same order is followed in the procession
           up the aisle, the relatives occupying
           the first pews on the right, the pall-bearers
           the first pews on the left, of the middle aisle.
           At the conclusion of the ceremony the friends
           wait until the family and pall-bearers have
           left, and then quietly retire.

      HOUSE. At a house funeral, some one representing
           the family should receive the people
           as they enter and direct them where to go,
           it being customary for the family and relatives
           to be in one room and the friends in
           another.

           Usually there are no pall-bearers; but if
           there are, their duties are the same as at a
           church funeral. The clergyman should stand
           near the casket, and if there are musicians
           they should be so stationed that, while they
           are not seen, they are easily heard. At the
           conclusion of the ceremony the friends depart,
           and thus allow the family and relatives
           to take the last leave of the deceased
           before they take the carriages for the cemetery.

           It is customary for the family to be in
           retirement at the hour of the funeral, and
           they are the first to enter the carriages.

           Those in charge of the house should, after
           the funeral party has left, arrange the
           apartments to make them as cheerful as possible,
           and also provide a substantial meal for
           the mourners on their return.

    G

    GARDEN PARTIES.

      CARDS. Guests leave their cards in the hall either
             when entering or leaving only at large garden
             parties.

      DRESS. It is customary for women to wear light
             afternoon dresses.

             Men wear summer business suits, yachting
             flannels, and straw hats, and even white duck
             trousers. Gloves are not worn.

             The regulation frock coat and high hat is
             not worn, save by men from the city or at
             some extremely fashionable affair.

      GUESTS. After leaving their outer garments in
           the dressing-rooms, the guests should pay
           their respects to the hostess, after which
           they are free to enjoy themselves as they
           please.

           The usual length of stay is about half an
           hour or the whole afternoon.

           While guests may arrive at their own convenient
           time, they would do well to remember
           that they have not the same freedom to come
           and go as at an afternoon reception.

           Guests should take leave of the hostess unless
           she is very much engaged.

      HOSTESS. The hostess wears afternoon dress,
           and usually one that is dainty and delicate--
           suitable for a summer afternoon.

           She receives on the lawn, shakes hands
           with each guest, and makes introductions
           when deemed essential.

           She may, if she so desires, receive with
           some member of her family.

      HOURS. These are from 3 to 7 P.M.

      INVITATIONS. These are issued in the name of
           the hostess, and may be engraved or written.
           Sometimes the hostess writes on her card:
           GARDEN PARTY, JULY 17, FROM 4 TO 7, or she
           may use an AT HOME card, and in the lower
           left-hand corner write: GARDEN PARTY. The
           engraved card usually indicates an elaborate
           affair.

           These invitations may be sent by mail or
           messenger.

           It is a good plan to add to the invitations
           some information regarding the trains, or to
           enclose a time-table.

           All such invitations should be promptly
           acknowledged or declined.

      MEN. Men wear summer business suits, white
           ducks, or yachting flannels, A tennis suit
           would be permissible.

           The regulation frock coat and high hat
           should be worn only by men from the city
           attending an affair in the country, or at some
           extremely fashionable affair.

           Men should greet the hostess both on their
           arrival and departure.

           Visiting-cards are left only at large garden
           parties.

      WOMEN. Women wear light, delicate, afternoon
           dresses.

           They should greet the hostess, both on their
           arrival and departure.

           Visiting-cards are left only at large and
           formal outdoor affairs.

    GERMANS. See COTILLIONS.

    GIFTS.

      AFTER HOUSE PARTY. While not necessary, a
           guest after a house party may send some
           trifle to the hostess as a token of pleasure
           and appreciation.

      BEST MAN. After the groom selects the best
           man, the latter should send a gift to the
           bride, and may, if he wish, send it to the
           groom, a custom not yet clearly established.

      CHRISTENING. A christening ceremony offers a
           good opportunity for the invited guests so
           wishing to send a gift to the baby. These
           should be sent a day or two before the
           ceremony, and, if of silver, should be suitably
           marked with the child's name, initials, or
           monogram.

      ENGAGEMENT. If both families of the engaged
           couple are old acquaintances, the parents of
           the man may send a gift along with their
           greetings and congratulations.

      WEDDING. See WEDDINGS--GIFTS.

    GIFTS BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN. Books, flowers,
           and other small articles of decoration are
           proper gifts to accept.

           Sending valuable gifts of jewelry, or any
           other article, depends largely upon the
           relationships of the parties, and should not be
           done unless the sender is sure of its
           acceptance. Such gifts should not be accepted
           from mere acquaintances or friends.

           It is bad form for a man to send expensive
           presents to a woman who may be compelled
           to return them.

    GLOVES.

      MEN. At the opera or theatre, if in full dress,
           gloves may be dispensed with, but they are
           worn with street dress. With formal evening
           dress, white kid gloves should be worn.

           For afternoon dress, gloves should be of
           undressed kid, gray, tan, or brown. When
           calling, the glove of the right hand should
           be removed upon entering the drawing-room.

           Gloves should not be worn at high teas.

      MEN--AFTERNOON DRESS. Undressed kid
           gloves of a dark color are worn.

      MEN-BALLS. Men should always wear gloves
           at all balls, in summer or winter, in town or
           city.

      MEN-CALLING ON WOMEN. Gloves need not
           be removed at a formal or brief call.

      MEN-DANCES. Gloves should be worn at formal
           dances, and should be put on before entering
           the room.

      MEN-HIGH TEA. Men do not wear gloves.

      MEN-MOURNING. Black or dark-colored gloves
           should be worn.

      MEN--SHAKING HANDS. At weddings, operas,
           or dances, and on all very formal occasions,
           men wear gloves. In shaking hands with
           women on these occasions gloves should not
           be removed.

           If a hostess wears gloves at any formal
           affair, a man wears his when he shakes hands
           with her.

           A man with hands gloved should never
           shake hands with a woman without an apology
           for so doing, unless she likewise wears gloves.
           A sudden meeting, etc., may make a hand-shaking
           in gloves unavoidable. Unless the
           other party is also gloved, a man should say:
           "Please excuse my glove."

      WOMEN. Gloves should always be worn on the
           street.

           At dinners, or formal teas, women should
           remove their gloves at the table and place
           them in their laps.

           At dinners and formal teas, when the
           women have retired to the drawing-room,
           they may resume their gloves or not, or
           follow the example of the hostess.

           At informal teas or "At Homes" the
           hostess need not wear gloves.

      BREAKFAST. Gloves should be removed at table.

      DINNER. Women may remove their gloves at
           table, and it is not necessary to replace
           them. They should be laid in the lap. The
           hostess generally determines by her own
           actions whether the women should resume
           gloves or not.

      MOURNING. Gloves may be of black kid, suede,
           or black silk. In the evening, black suede
           or glace, or white suede should be worn.
           White gloves with black stitching should not
           be worn in the evening.

      BRIDE. See BRIDE--GLOVES.

      GROOM. See GROOM--GLOVES.

      USHERS. See USHERS--GLOVES.

    GODFATHER. A man asked to be one of the sponsors
           at a christening ceremony should reply by a
           written note or by calling in person.

           He should call immediately on the parents
           and send flowers to the mother, and express
           himself as pleased at the compliment.

           He should send a present to the child,
           usually a piece of jewelry or some silver, and,
           if a wealthy relative, may deposit a sum of
           money to the child's credit, and present him
           with the bank-book.

           He should also send with his present one
           of his calling cards, on which is written some
           appropriate sentiment.

           It is his privilege, when the wine is about
           to be drunk after the ceremony, to first
           propose the health of the child and then the
           health of the mother.

           The duties of the godfather at the ceremony
           consist of assenting to the vows.

    GODMOTHER. A woman asked to be a sponsor at a
           christening should immediately accept or
           decline the invitation either by a written note
           or a call.

           She should also call on the parents and send
           flowers to the mother, and express pleasure
           at the compliment paid to her.

           It is always customary for the godmother
           to give the child a gift, such as a christening
           robe, a cradle, or some piece of silver. If
           the latter is sent, it should have the child's
           name on it. With the gift should be sent
           the sponsor's calling card, with some
           appropriate sentiment on it. It is customary to
           send the gift to the child itself.

    GOLDEN WEDDINGS. Fifty years after the wedding-day
           comes the Golden Wedding. The invitations
           may bear the words: NO PRESENTS
           RECEIVED, and congratulations may be extended
           in accepting or declining the invitation. An
           entertainment is usually provided for.

           The gifts are, appropriately, articles of
           gold, and this is a fitting occasion for giving
           fifty gold pieces of either, five, ten, or twenty
           dollar denomination. The invitations are
           appropriately engraved in gold, and the
           decorations golden in color.

    GOVERNOR OF A STATE--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have the honor,
           sir, to remain your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Governor
           Wilson, and ends: Believe me, most sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Governor
           John J. Wilson.

    GRAPES AND PLUMS should be eaten one by one, and
           the pits allowed to fall noiselessly into the
           half-closed hand and then transferred to the
           plate.

    GROOM. The groom selects his best man, usually
           an unmarried intimate friend, though a married
           man or widower is permissible. After
           consultation with the bride he calls upon the
           clergyman, the organist, the sexton, and invites
           the ushers.

           When he is informed by his bride of the
           day selected for the wedding, he should ask
           her mother to accept the day agreed upon.

           He may make what present he desires to
           the bride, and, if he also wishes, to the brides-
           maids. If any gifts are sent to the groom,
           they should bear his name or cipher.

           He should furnish the bride's family with
           a list of names of persons to whom he desires
           to have invitations sent, designating his
           preference for those to be asked to the wedding
           breakfast or reception.

      BEFORE CEREMONY. The day before the ceremony,
           or sooner, he gives into the safe-
           keeping of the best man the ring and the fee
           for the clergyman.

           He also sends or hands the marriage license
           (if one is needed) to the officiating
           clergyman before the ceremony.

      CHURCH, It is not customary for the groom to
           see his bride on the wedding-day till he
           meets her at the altar. The groom and the
           best man usually breakfast together on the
           wedding-day and arrive in ample time at the
           church.

           Upon the arrival of the bride in the
           vestibule, the clergyman enters the chancel,
           followed by the groom and the best man. The
           groom then steps forward, and stands at the
           left of the clergyman, facing the audience. It
           is a good plan for both the groom and best
           man to leave their hats in the vestry, but if
           the groom has not done so, he gives his hat
           and gloves to the best man on the approach
           of the bride, and advances to meet her. He
           gives her his left arm, and together they stand
           before the clergyman.

           At the proper moment he receives the ring
           from the best man and hands it to the bride.
           It is no longer in good form for him to kiss
           the bride after the ceremony, but after receiving
           the congratulations of the clergyman
           to give her his right arm, and together they
           lead the procession to the vestibule.

      CLERGYMAN. While the bride selects the officiating
           clergyman, it is the place of the groom
           to call upon him in regard to the details, and
           to pay him the fee.

           If the clergyman from any cause--as, living
           outside of the State--cannot legally perform
           the ceremony, a magistrate should be present
           to legalize the marriage, and should receive
           a fee.

      DRESS-EVENING WEDDING. He wears full
           evening dress.

      DRESS-MORNING OR AFTERNOON WEDDING.
           He wears afternoon dress, consisting of a
           double-breasted frock coat of dark material,
           waistcoat, single or double (preferably the
           latter), of same material, or more usually of
           some fancy material of late design. The
           trousers should be of light pattern, avoiding
           extremes. The linen should be white, and
           the tie white or light material, and the gloves
           of gray suede. These, with patent-leather
           shoes and a silk hat, complete the costume.

      EXPENSES. He pays for the license fee, the
           organist's fee, and a fee to the sexton.

           Nothing less than five dollars in gold,
           clean bills, or a check in a sealed envelope,
           or more, according to social position and
           financial income, should be the clergyman's
           fee. Should there be one or two additional
           clergymen, he pays a fee to each, the fee of
           the officiating clergyman being double that
           of the others.

           He pays for the carriages of the ushers,
           the one for himself and the best man, and
           the one which takes away the married couple
           on their wedding trip.

           He pays for the bouquet carried by the
           bride, and, if he wishes, for the bouquets
           carried by the bridesmaids. He also pays for
           the cuff-buttons or scarf-pins, and, if he
           wishes, for the gloves and neckties given
           to the ushers and the best man.

           He pays for the wedding-ring--a plain gold
           one, with initials of bride and groom and
           date of marriage engraved thereon. He may
           also present some souvenirs to the
           bridesmaids.

           He may give a farewell dinner a few
           evenings before the wedding to his best man,
           ushers, and a few intimate friends. He sits
           at the head of the table and the best man
           opposite, and on this occasion he may give
           the scarf-pins or cuff-buttons, also neckties
           and gloves, if he wishes, to the best man and
           ushers.

      FAREWELL DINNER. See BACHELOR'S FAREWELL
           DINNER.

      GLOVES. At a morning or afternoon wedding,
           the groom wears gray suede gloves.

           At an evening wedding he wears white kid
           gloves.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The bride and groom
           enter first, and are seated at the principal
           table.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. The groom and his bride
           stand side by side and receive the
           congratulations of all present. The guests serve
           them refreshments.

             See also BEST MAN. BRIDE. USHERS. All
           items under WEDDINGS.

    GROOM'S FAMILY. See FAMILY OF GROOM.

    GROOM'S FATHER. See FATHER OF GROOM.

    GROOM'S MOTHER. See MOTHER OF GROOM.

    GUESTS.

      GUEST OF HONOR AT BALLS, if the ball is given
           in honor of some special person, he should be
           met on his arrival, introduced to the women
           of the reception committee, escorted to the
           seat prepared for him, and be attended to the
           whole evening by the management of the ball.

           At the end of the ball, he should be escorted
           to his carriage.

      LATE AT DINNERS. When a guest arrives late
           he should make a short and suitable apology
           to the hostess, and then take his seat as
           quickly and as quietly as possible.

           The hostess shakes hands with the guest,
           but does not rise unless the guest is a woman.

           The host should in either case rise and
           meet the guest, and assist him in finding his
           seat, and endeavor, by making the conversation
           general, to distract attention from the
           event.

           For duties of guests, see other functions--
           as, BALLS--GUESTS, CHRISTENINGS--GUESTS, etc.

    H

    HAND-SHAKING--INTRODUCTIONS. Women and men on
           being introduced may shake hands, but it is
           not good form. A polite bow, a smile, and
           friendly recognition is more correct. If an
           advance is made by either party, it should be
           immediately accepted.

    HAT.

      MEN--CALLING. When making a formal or
           brief call, the hat should be carried in the
           hand into the parlor.

           In apologizing to a woman, opening a door,
           or rendering any service to a woman in public,
           or in answering a question, the hat should
           be raised.

           When seeing a woman to her carriage, he
           should raise his hat upon closing the
           carriage door. When attentions are offered by
           another man to a woman whom he is escorting,
           a man raises his hat in acknowledgment
           of the courtesy and thanks the party.

           In a street-car a man raises his hat when
           giving his seat to a woman.

           On the railroad a man removes his hat in
           the parlor-car, but not in the day coach.

           In an elevator a man should remove his
           hat in the presence of women.

           In hotels where corridors are reserved and
           used as places of meeting and recreation by
           the guests, no hats should be worn. Standing
           uncovered when talking to a woman on
           the street is generally embarrassing to her,
           and it is better to make a polite bow and
           replace it after a few seconds.

      MOURNING. A crape band around the hat should
           be worn--the width of the band being
           determined by the character of the bereavement.

    HIGH TEA. This is an elaborate entertainment,
           and an elaborate menu is generally served.

      CALLS. Calls should be made in person one week
           after the event.

      GUESTS. Guests wear evening dress, and should
           not remain more than half an hour.

      INVITATIONS. These are engraved, and the
           hour for the entertainment specified. They
           should be issued in the name of the hostess
           only, except in such cases when the entertainment
           is the occasion of a debut or another
           woman assists, in which event her
           name appears likewise.

           The invitations should be promptly accepted
           or declined.

      MEN. Full dress is worn, but men do not wear
           gloves.

      WOMEN. Full dress is worn.

    HOME WEDDINGS. Weddings at the homes of the
           brides vary much, according to the taste of
           the participants. The ushers, bridesmaids,
           best man, and maid of honor are generally
           dispensed with; but if present, their duties
           are the same as at a church wedding, with
           minor differences.

           The clergyman stands in a large room
           decorated with flowers, facing the audience,
           with the groom beside him. The bride enters
           on the arm of her father, followed by the
           bridesmaids and ushers, and the ceremony
           proceeds as at a church, with the usual
           congratulations to the groom and best wishes to
           the bride.

           Refreshments are served, either formal or
           informal. At an afternoon ceremony men
           wear the regulation afternoon dress, and if
           in the evening, the usual evening dress.

    HONEYMOON, See WEDDING TRIP.

    HONOR, SEAT OF. The seat of honor is at the right
           of the host.

    HOST.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS--HOST.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS--
           HOST.

      BACHELORS' TEAS. See BACHELORS' TEAS--HOST.

      BALLS. See BALLS--HOST.

      DANCES. See DANCES (FORMAL)--HOST.

      DINNERS. See DINNERS--HOST.

      MATINEES. See MATINEES--HOST.

      THEATRES. See THEATRE AND OPERA PARTIES
           GIVEN BY MEN.

    HOSTESS.

      INTRODUCTIONS. Introductions to the hostess at
           an "At Home" or reception by women
           assisting hostess, to those who have been invited
           to the entertainment by them, are not
           recognized thereafter unless by mutual consent.

           The hostess receiving in her own home
           should offer her hand to all to whom she is
           introduced.

           The hostess introduces her immediate family
           to all her guests. No formal permission
           is necessary.

           In the case of one woman desiring an introduction
           to another, the hostess should be
           asked to bring this about.

      INTRODUCTIONS BY CHAPERONES. At entertainments
           both the chaperone and her protege
           should enter together, and the chaperone
           should introduce her protege to the hostess.

      WOMEN CALLING UPON. When calling formally
           upon a hostess, a woman should leave a card,
           whether the hostess was at home or not.

           When a son enters society, his mother,
           when calling, can leave his cards for him, and
           invitations to entertainments will follow. If
           it is impossible for him to leave cards for himself
           she may continue to do so.

      WOMEN LEAVING CARDS ON. When a mother
           leaves her daughter's card, it is for the hostess
           only.

      HIGH TEAS. See HIGH TEAS--HOSTESS.

      HOUSE PARTIES. See HOUSE PARTIES--HOSTESS.

      LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEONS--HOSTESS.

      MATINEES. See MATINEES--HOSTESS.

      SHAKING HANDS. See SHAKING HANDS--HOST.

      WEDDINGS. See MOTHER OF BRIDE.

    HOURS.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS--HOURS.

      BREAKFASTS. See BREAKFASTS--HOURS.

      CALLS. See CALLS--HOURS.

      DINNERS. See DINNERS--HOURS.

      GARDEN PARTIES. See GARDEN PARTIES--HOURS.

      LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEONS--HOURS.

      MUSICALES. See MUSICALES--HOURS.

      RECEPTIONS. See RECEPTIONS--HOURS.

      WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS--HOURS.

    HOUSE FUNERALS. See FUNERALS--HOUSE.

    HOUSE PARTIES. These usually refer to a group of congenial
           persons, numbering from four to
           twenty-four, and visiting country homes,
           making a stay of a few days or a few weeks.

      DRESS. The length of the visit and the nature
           of the house party determines the extent of
           wardrobe necessary. A guest should carry
           at least three changes of suits--one for the
           morning, one suitable for afternoon entertainments,
           picnics, etc., and the regulation
           evening dress.

      GUEST. To be a welcome guest the visitor
           should accommodate himself as much as possible
           to the plans of his hostess and the ways
           of the home life.

           A visitor should avoid the common mistake
           of refusing to make a choice when a
           choice is offered.

           A guest should try to be congenial with
           the other guests, kind to the servants, and
           to be considerate of all others.

      EXPENSES. The hostess should furnish transportation
           for both guests and baggage to and
           from the station.

           Each guest should pay for all expenses incurred
           by him, and be especially careful, in
           the case of sickness or misfortune, that some
           items are not overlooked.

      LETTER AFTER DEPARTURE. If the visit has
           been more than two days, the guest should
           write a short letter to the hostess, telling
           of the pleasure the visit gave them and their
           safe journey home.

           A guest so desiring might send some trifle
           as a gift to the hostess.

      TIPPING SERVANTS. Unless a hostess positively
           requests her guests not to tip, a guest,
           when leaving at the end of a visit at a private
           house, should remember the servants.
           The average American, from lack of a definite
           standard, too often errs on the side of
           giving too much.

           Those giving personal service should be
           remembered, as well as those who render service--
           as, the coachman and outside servants.

      HOSTESS. While careful to provide entertainment
           for her guests, a hostess should be careful
           not to overentertain, and to allow each guest
           ample time in which to enjoy themselves
           any way they please. If an entertainment
           is planned for the afternoon, it is well to
           leave the mornings open, and VICE VERSA.

           The success of the hostess depends on her
           making the guests feel free from care and
           ENNUI.

      CARING POR THE SICK. In addition to the regular
           care of the guest's room and attention to
           his comfort and pleasure, a hostess should
           double her energies in case her guest is sick.

           She is not called upon to pay for the expenses
           of telegrams, doctor's bills, medicines,
           etc., contracted by the guest. If a
           guest departed without attending to these
           matters, the hostess would have to pay for
           them.

      GIVING FAREWELL, To VISITORS. A hostess
           should, in bidding farewell to her visitors,
           see that she does not overdo it.

           While it is not strictly necessary that a
           hostess should accompany a guest to the depot,
           yet many still follow this rule, especially in
           the case of an unmarried woman, and are
           careful to see to all the details of checking
           baggage, etc.

           In the case of a bachelor, such attention
           is not necessary.

           A hostess conveys at her own expense both
           the guest and baggage to and from the
           station.

      GREETING VISITORS. When an hour of arrival
           is specified in an invitation, the guest
           should be met at the station, especially an
           unmarried woman, by the hostess or host.
           In case of married couples or bachelors, a
           man servant may meet them.

           In all cases the hostess should arrange for
           the conveyance of both the guests and their
           luggage.

           A hostess accompanies a woman to the
           guest chamber, but sends a man servant
           with a bachelor to the latter's room.

      INVITATIONS. These should state definitely
           when a visit is to begin and to end. It is
           also a good plan to allude in the invitation
           to any special amusement or entertainment.

           These invitations should be answered
           promptly.

      MEN--DRESS. A man should carry with him
           one business suit, evening clothes, and one
           outing suit suitable for afternoon entertainments
           --as, picnics, tennis, etc. This is almost
           indispensable, and more depends upon the
           nature of the entertainments and the length
           of the visit.

      WOMEN--DRESS. A woman should take at least
           three changes of dress--one to travel in and
           wear in the morning, one for evening wear,
           and a third for afternoon picnics, outings,
           etc. The length of her visit and the nature of
           the entertainments and her individual taste
           determines how much she may increase this.

    HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES, MEMBER OF. An official
           letter begins: SIR, and ends: I HAVE, SIR, THE
           HONOR TO REMAIN YOUR MOST OBEDIENT SERVANT.

           A social letter begins: MY DEAR MR. WILSON
           and ends: I HAVE THE HONOR TO REMAIN MOST
           SINCERELY YOURS.

           The address on the envelope is: HON. JOHN
           F. WILSON.

    HUSBAND AND WIFE--CARDS, VISITING. See CARDS,
           VISITING-HUSBAND AND WIFE.

    I

    IN MEMORIAM CARDS. Printed or engraved notes, or
           special cards, can be used, and should be
           heavily bordered. Custom allows much diversity
           as to the contents of the card. Place
           and date of birth, residence, date of death,
           and any other information of interest to
           friends and relatives may be given.

    INFANT'S CARDS. The full name of the child should
           be engraved, with date of birth in lower
           left-hand corner, enclosed in envelope with
           mother's card, and sent by mail. Such cards
           are generally held together with white ribbon.

    INFORMAL AFTERNOON TEAS. These are the usual afternoon
           teas. By formal afternoon teas are
           meant those for which specially engraved
           cards have been issued, and at which all the
           arrangements are more elaborate.

             See AFTERNOON TEAS.

    INTERIOR, SECRETARY OF--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, sir, the
           honor to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain most
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary Of The Interior.

    INTRODUCTIONS. One should be careful in making introductions.
           It is easier to evade than to cause
           disagreeable complications. It is unpardonable
           to introduce one party to another after
           having been warned not to do so.

           Forgetting a person's name when about to
           introduce is awkward, and when it does
           occur, one should apologize and ask name.
           If a person fails to hear the name, it is proper
           to inform the one to whom you are introduced
           and to say: "Pardon me, but I failed to
           hear your name." In making introductions
           one should distinctly pronounce the names.

           Parents should not speak of or introduce
           their children as MISS ANNA, but simply
           MY DAUGHTER ANNA. Only before servants
           should they be spoken of as MISS ANNA.

           Persons of celebrity should have introductions
           made to them. Men should always be
           introduced to women, the younger to an
           elder person, and unmarried persons to the
           married. Persons at an entertainment are
           introduced to the guest of the occasion.

           Women and men on being introduced may
           shake hands, but it is not good form. A
           polite bow, a smile, and friendly recognition
           is more correct.

           Those invited to an entertainment are on
           equal footing; it is therefore not necessary
           to introduce one to another. Conversation
           may be held without this formality, though
           introductions may take place if desired.
           When an introduction occurs, future recognition
           is not warranted. For this reason
           great care should be exercised at entertainments
           that only those who are congenial to
           each other should be brought together.

           At small gatherings it is more kindly to
           introduce. When many are present, it is not
           customary to do so.

           Introductions should not take place in a
           church or on the steps.

           It is quite proper to introduce one group
           to another without formality at any outdoor
           function--athletic games, etc. Such introductions
           need not imply further acquaintance
           if undesirable.

      DANCING. The man must be introduced to the
           woman, and he should ask her for the privilege
           of a dance.

      ENTERTAINMENTS. Introductions are not absolutely
           required at musicales, teas, "At
           Homes," etc. One may converse with those
           nearest, but this does not warrant future
           recognition.

      MEN. Men are introduced to women and single
           men to married men.

           When introduced to a woman, a man
           should bow but not shake hands, and make
           some pleasant observations, and express
           pleasure at the introduction.

           When introduced to another man, the
           man should shake hands.

           Business introductions are immediate and
           personal, and are intended to bring men
           together without much formality. No formality
           is required in introducing one man to
           another on casual meeting.

           It is well to avoid exaggerated expressions,
           as: "Delighted to meet you," or
           "Glad to know you." A simple "How do
           you do" is better.

           A man introducing another to a woman
           should first ask her permission to do so.
           This gained, he introduces him with the
           remark: "Mr. Smith desires to be introduced
           to Miss Wilson."

           A woman's permission should first be obtained
           by the party introducing. Very often
           off-hand introductions take place; but it is
           better to be more formal and careful, as indicated.
           If she evades or declines, a man
           should accept it without any show of feeling,
           and make it as easy for her as possible.

           After an introduction at an entertainment,
           when a man meets the woman on the street,
           she should bow first if she desires to continue
           the acquaintance.

      CHAPERONE. A man should never be introduced
           direct by card or letter to a young unmarried
           woman. If he desires to be introduced, the
           letter or card of introduction should be addressed
           to her chaperone or mother, who may
           then introduce him to the young woman if
           she deems it advisable.

           At an entertainment a chaperone may ask
           a young man if he wishes to be introduced
           to the one under her care.

      FORMULA. A good formula for men is: "Mr.
           Brown, may I present Mr. Clark?"

           A man presenting a man friend to a woman
           should say: "Mr. Williams desires to be
           presented to Miss Wilson. Miss Wilson,
           allow me to introduce Mr. Williams. This is
           Mr. Williams, Miss Wilson."

           The formality is sometimes waved, and the
           forms, "This is Mr. So and So, Miss Jones,"
           "Mrs. Smith, Miss Jones," or "Allow me to
           present ----," are used when casual meetings
           occur.

      PARTY INTRODUCED. After receiving call of
           party to whom you have been introduced,
           the visit should be returned. If AT HOME
           card was left, the call should be made only
           on the days specified; if an ordinary card,
           call at any time within three to ten days.

           If the party introduced leaves town, he
           should send his card to his late host before
           leaving; upon his return, he should leave
           his card again.

      PARTY INTRODUCING BY CARD--WOMEN. A
           note of explanation may be sent by party who
           brings about the introduction to the party to
           whom the introduction is made, giving such
           explanations as may be deemed advisable.

           Two cards should be used--a person's own
           card and the card of the party being introduced,
           enclosed in envelope, and sent by
           mail or messenger. On the left corner over
           name of party introduced should be written:
                     INTRODUCING MR. WILSON

      PARTY INTRODUCING BY LETTER--WOMEN.
           Care should be exercised that the introduction
           is agreeable to all concerned.

      RECEPTIONS. The man should express desire
           for an introduction.

      WOMEN. Women calling and meeting others may
           be introduced to each other by the hostess.
           Upon such an occasion, when a meeting happens
           between women, conversation may take
           place between them without an introduction.
           It does not imply further acquaintance if not
           desired.

           Extreme etiquette demands that no two
           women of the same locality be introduced to
           each other without the consent of both parties.
           The object of this is that, although the parties
           may be agreeable to the hostess, they may
           be objectionable to each other.

           Women upon being introduced to each
           other may shake hands, but a slight inclination
           of the body, a smile, and an appropriate
           remark are more correct.

           When entering a room where others are
           assembled, introducing a guest to more than
           one person at a time is unadvisable.

           Men are introduced to women, single
           women to married women, and a young
           woman to an older one.

           No woman should allow a man to be introduced
           to her unless her permission has been
           first obtained. The exception would be in the
           case of a very elderly man, or a celebrity,
           when the honor would be conferred upon her.

           A married woman to whom a man is presented
           receives him with some pleasant remark.
           An unmarried one receives him with
           a pleasant smile and repeats his name.

           Personal introduction is done by a third
           party introducing two persons to each other,
           provided it is agreeable to all concerned. Introductions
           should be made with extreme
           care and caution, and not at all unless one is
           well acquainted with both parties.

           Outdoor Introductions--as, when meeting
           others, or at outdoor sports--need not be
           formal, but can be done haphazard. This
           does not imply further acquaintance if not
           desired.

      FORMULA. A woman should introduce her husband
           to acquaintances as "My husband,"
           and not "Mr."; to intimate friends as
           "Henry."

      HOSTESS. Introductions to the hostess at an
           "At Home," or reception by women assisting
           hostess, of those who have been invited to
           the entertainment by them, are not recognized
           thereafter unless by mutual consent.

           The hostess receiving in her own home
           should offer her hand to all to whom she is
           introduced.

           The hostess introduces her immediate family
           to all her guests. No formal permission
           is necessary.

           In the case of one woman desiring an introduction
           to another, the hostess should be
           asked to bring this about.

    INTRODUCTION, LETTERS OF. The introduction of one
           person to another by letter is as follows: The
           party introducing writes the name of the party
           he introduces upon his own card, and above
           his name the words: Introducing Mr. Wilson
           (his friend's name). It is then placed in an
           envelope and addressed to the person to whom
           the introduction is to be made. On the
           lower left-hand corner of the envelope, Introducing
           Mr. Wilson, is written, and given to
           the bearer unsealed.

           The party to whom a letter of introduction
           is given should send it by mail to the party
           they desire to be introduced to, enclosing
           their own card with address, and then await
           invitation to call.

           This is preferable to calling in person, as
           it may not be agreeable or desirable for the
           party to open and begin such an acquaintance.

           In business introduction, such formality
           may be set aside.

           If a letter of introduction is personally delivered,
           the party presenting it should also
           enclose card.

           If the party called upon is not at home,
           the letter or card should not be left, but sent
           by mail or messenger.

           The one giving another a letter of introduction
           may write to the friend explaining
           why it is done, who and what the party is.

           If a man sends a letter of introduction to
           a woman, she should acknowledge it, and, if
           she wishes, invite him to call.

      PARTY RECEIVING--WOMEN. The party receiving
             cards of introduction should call in person
             upon woman introduced; if unable to do
             so, a letter should be sent, stating reasons of
             inability to be present. A member of the
             family may make the call instead. It should
             be done within three days.

             If not agreeable to receive party for any
             reason, a card may be sent or left. No personal
             visit need be made.

    INVALID'S CALLS. A woman unable to call from sickness
           may have her calls made for her by her
           sister, or daughter, or some female relative.

    INVITATIONS. Care should be exercised in inviting
           new acquaintances to breakfast, luncheon, or
           dinner, unless there are some particular
           reasons why they will be especially agreeable
           to those invited.

           All invitations should be sent by mail.

           Verbal invitations should be avoided as
           much as possible, and if a verbal one is given,
           it should be followed immediately by one in
           writing.

      ACCEPTING OR DECLINING. Invitations to all
           entertainments, when answers are expected,
           should be acknowledged by a written letter
           of acceptance or regret. The answer should
           be sent to the person or committee issuing the
           invitation.

           Invitations to dinners, musicales, weddings,
           and breakfasts should be answered at
           once, and those to balls, dances, and receptions
           within one week.

           Invitations to ordinary "At Homes," teas,
           or weddings, which do not include invitations
           to the wedding breakfast or reception,
           need no acknowledgment.

           The invitations sent to a family--as,
           mother, or daughter, or several daughters--
           may be answered by one person for all. But
           invitations sent to the men of the family
           should be answered by each man.

           When it is found necessary to decline after
           accepting an invitation, a card should be sent
           the evening of the entertainment with an explanatory
           letter the day following.

      BALLS. Invitations to balls or assemblies should
           be answered immediately, and if declined the
           ticket should be returned.

      DANCING. While a woman may accept or decline
           any invitation to dance, it is considered a
           discourteous act to refuse one man and to accept
           thereafter from another an invitation to
           the same dance.

      WEDDINGS. Such invitations should be answered
           at once, except when the invitation does not
           include an invitation to the wedding reception
           or breakfast, in which case no answer is
           needed.

      ADDRESSING. When invitations are sent to a
           husband and wife and daughter, only one envelope
           is needed, the daughter's name appearing
           under her parents. Separate envelopes
           should be addressed to two daughters--as,
           Misses Wilson.

           Separate envelopes should be addressed to
           each son.

      MEN. If an invitation is sent to a man, he should
           answer it himself; but if sent to a man and
           wife, the latter may answer for both.

      TO CALL WITH CHAPERONE'S PERMISSION. If
           permission is asked, and if agreeable, a chaperone
           should invite a man to call upon her and
           her protege.

           Every effort should be made to call at the
           specified time.

      TO CALL ON WOMEN. If a woman invites a man
           to call without specifying the time, it is
           equivalent to no invitation at all.

      TO CALL ON WOMEN THROUGH LETTERS OF
           INTRODUCTION. If a man having a letter
           of introduction sends the same by mail to a
           woman, it should be acknowledged by a written
           invitation to call. If the person receiving
           the letter does not care to receive the party, a
           card is sent which ends the matter.

      R. S. V. P. The use of these letters--standing
           for "Repondez, s'il vous plait" (Answer, if you
           please)--is decreasing. All invitations bearing
           these letters should be answered at once.

           These may be used on invitations to ceremonious
           receptions, breakfasts, luncheons,
           dinners, and to meet a prominent person.

      WIFE. When a husband and wife are invited to
           a dinner, and the former does not accept,
           the wife should also decline and give her
           reasons. The hostess can then invite the
           wife only, who may accept.

      WOMEN. A young woman receiving an invitation
           to a man's supper, tea, or dinner, may
           accept, if she has the consent of her mother
           or chaperone, and is assured that a chaperone
           will be present.

      WOMEN--THEATRE. Women receiving an invitation
           from a man for the theatre should have
           the consent of mother or chaperone, and when
           they accept, may, with propriety, request
           their escort not to provide a carriage unless
           full dress on their part is requested.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS--INVITATIONS.
           AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL)--INVITATIONS.

      AT HOMES.
             See AT HOMES--INVITATIONS.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS.
             See BACHELORS' DINNERS--INVITATIONS.

      BACHELORS' TEAS.
             See BACHELORS' TEAS--INVITATIONS.

      BALLS.
             See BALLS--INVITATIONS.

      BREAKFASTS.
             See BREAKFASTS--INVITATIONS.

      BRIDE.
             See BRIDE--INVITATIONS.

      CHRISTENINGS.
             See CHRISTENINGS--INVITATIONS.

      COTILLIONS.
             See COTILLIONS--INVITATIONS.
             See COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS--INVITATIONS.

      MUSICALES.
             See MUSICALES--INVITATIONS.

      PALL-BEARERS.
             See PALL-BEARERS--INVITATIONS.

      PARTIES.
             See PARTIES--INVITATIONS.

      TELEPHONE.
             See TELEPHONE INVITATIONS.

      THEATRE.
             See THEATRE AND OPERA PARTIES
             GIVEN BY MEN--INVITATIONS.

      VERBAL.
             See VERBAL INVITATIONS.

    IVORY WEDDING. This is the thirtieth wedding anniversary,
           and is not usually celebrated. If,
           however, it is done, the invitations may bear
           the words: NO PRESENTS RECEIVED, and in accepting
           or declining the invitation congratulations
           may be extended. Any article of ivory is appropriate
           as a gift. An entertainment is usually
           provided.

    J

    JEWELRY--MEN. Jewelry, except the very plainest,
           should not be worn, and in general the less
           the better. A display of diamonds and fancy
           jewelry betrays the poor taste of the wearer.

           A man wearing the pins and badges of
           secret societies should see that they are small
           and unobtrusive, for in jewelry, as in all
           matters of dress, quality rather than quantity
           is to be desired.

    JR. When the son is named after the father, he
           adds Jr. to his name. Upon the death of the
           father he omits it. This abbreviation is
           sometimes added to a woman's name on her
           card when her husband has the same name as
           his father, and it is necessary to distinguish
           between the cards of the daughter-in-law
           and the mother-in-law.

           If the mother-in-law should become a
           widow and wish to retain the husband's
           baptismal name, she should add Sr., while
           her daughter would erase Jr.

           If both become widows, and wish to
           retain their husband's Christian names, the
           daughter-in-law should add Jr.

    JUSTICE OF THE UNITED STATES SUPREME COURT--HOW
           ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Sir,
           and ends: I have, sir, the honor to remain
           your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Justice Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Mr. Justice
           John J. Wilson.

    K

    KING OF ENGLAND--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Sir, may it please your Majesty, and
           ends: I have the honor to remain your Majesty's
           most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Sir, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain your Majesty's
           most obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To His
           Most Gracious Majesty, King Edward.

    KISS, WEDDING. The kiss in the wedding ceremony
           is being done away with, especially at church
           weddings. Only the bride's parents and her
           most intimate friends should kiss her, and
           for others to do so is no longer good form.

    KNIFE AND FORK. The knife is always held in the
           right hand, and is only used for cutting the
           food. The fork is used not only in eating
           fish, meat, vegetables, and made dishes, but
           also ices, frozen puddings, melons, salads,
           oysters, clams, lobsters, and terrapin.

           The knife should never be used to carry
           food to the mouth.

             See also SPOON.

    KNIGHT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           Sir, and ends: I have the honor to remain,
           sir, your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Sir John Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Sir John,
           faithfully yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To Sir
           John Wilson.

      WIFE OF. See Wife of Knight.

    L

    LAUNDRESS--TIPS. Guests at the end of a house
           party do not tip the laundress unless she has
           done special work for them.

    LEATHER WEDDING. This is the twelfth anniversary
           of the wedding-day, and is not usually observed.
           If, however, it is observed, the invitations
           may bear the words: No presents
           received, and congratulations may be extended
           in its acceptance or declination. Any
           article of leather would be an appropriate
           gift. An entertainment usually follows.

    LETTERS.

      ADDRESSING.
             See ADDRESSING AND SIGNING LETTERS,
             and also under title of person addressed
             --as, GOVERNOR, MAYOR, etc.

      WRITTEN AFTER HOUSE PARTIES. If the visit
           has been more than two days in length, a
           guest should write to the hostess a short
           letter, telling of his pleasant visit and safe
           journey home.

      CONCLUSION OF. See CONCLUSION OF A LETTER.

      OF CONDOLENCE. See CONDOLENCE, LETTERS OF.

      OF INTRODUCTION. See INTRODUCTION, LETTERS OF.

    LETTUCE leaves should not be cut, but folded up with
           a fork, and then lifted to the mouth. In the
           event of these being too large for this treatment,
           they should be broken into suitable
           pieces with the fork.

    LICENSE, MARRIAGE. A license, when required by
           State law, should be obtained by the groom
           and handed to the officiating clergyman the
           day before the ceremony. Usually a small fee
           is charged, and the details, when entered upon
           the clerk's records, are open to public inspection.
           The day need not be named, and until
           the marriage is solemnized the license has no
           binding effect.

    LUNCHEONS. Usually only women are invited to
           these entertainments. Oddities, such as pink,
           blue, and yellow luncheons, are not in good
           taste. They should be as simple as possible.

           Informal luncheons are the same as informal
           breakfasts. A more formal luncheon
           is proper when introducing a special guest.

           Small tables are used, and diagrams of their
           arrangement are placed in the dressing-room,
           designating the places of the guests.

      CALLS. Calls should be made a week after
           entertainment.

      WOMEN. Women dress in visiting toilettes and
           wear their bonnets, laying aside their wraps
           in the dressing-room. Gloves should be removed
           at table.

           After coffee, the guests should take their
           leave, making some gracious remark to the
           hostess.

           Calls should be made a week after the
           entertainment.

      GIVEN BY BACHELORS. See Bachelors' Luncheons.

      GUESTS. Only women, as a rule, attend luncheons.
           For further details, see LUNCHEONS--WOMEN.

      HOSTESS. Introductions take place in the parlor.
           At the appointed hour the hostess leads the
           way to the drawing-room, followed by the
           guests.

           The hostess and principal guest should sit
           at one of the centre-tables. Between the
           courses the hostess and two of the women
           seated with her rise and change seats with
           others. This may be done by others also if
           they desire. They take their napkins with
           them.

      HOURS. The hour is from 1 to 2 P.M.

      INTRODUCTIONS. Introductions take place in the
           parlor.

      INVITATIONS. Cards are engraved, and sent two
           weeks in advance.

      MEN--LEAVING CARDS. If men are invited, they
           should, after a luncheon, leave a card for host
           and hostess, whether the invitation was accepted
           or not; or it may be sent by mail or
           messenger, with an apology for so doing.

    M

    MAIDS--TIPS. It is customary for guests leaving
           after a visit at a private house to remember
           the maid who has taken care of the room
           by giving her a reasonable tip. A woman
           should give more for extra attention.

    MAID OF HONOR. This important person is selected
           by the bride, and acts for her in all details,
           being virtually mistress of ceremonies and filling
           a position requiring administrative ability
           and tact. She acts in the same capacity as
           the best man does for the groom.

           She is invited, of course, to the dinner
           given by the bride to the bridesmaids.

           She fulfils whatever duties the bride has
           been unable, from press of time, to attend to
           --as, making calls, etc.

      CHURCH. She goes to the church with one of
           the parents of the bride, and meets the bride
           and the bridesmaids in the vestibule. In the
           procession she follows behind the bridesmaids,
           and precedes the flower girl, if there
           is one--otherwise the bride. On their arrival
           at the altar she takes her place by the side of
           the bride, and is ready at the plighting of the
           troth to take the bride's glove and bouquet,
           and returns them to her at the end of the
           ceremony.

           After the congratulations of the clergyman,
           she parts the bridal veil, arranges the
           bride's train, and follows the bride down the
           aisle to the vestibule.

           Here, after giving her best wishes to the
           bride, she takes her carriage to the bride's
           house to take part in the reception or breakfast.

      DAY OF WEDDING. She should be at the house
           of the bride on the morning of the wedding-day
           to assist the bride's mother, to see that
           the trousseau is all ready and packed, that
           the bridesmaids are on time, and to attend
           to the many details liable to arise.

      DRESS. Her dress should be some delicate color
           other than white, so as not to detract from
           the bride, and should be subdued in comparison.
           It may be, and usually is, more
           elegant in quality than that of the bridesmaids.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The best man escorts the
           maid of honor, and they are usually seated
           at the bridal table.

      WEDDING RECEPTION. She stands next the
           bride to receive with her, and also retires
           with her to assist the latter in exchanging
           her wedding dress for the traveling-dress.

           It is her privilege to cast a slipper at the
           carriage which takes away the married
           couple, and her duty to prepare packages of
           rice, which are given to the guests to be
           thrown after the married couple as they
           leave the house.

    MAIL, INVITATIONS SENT BY. All invitations should be
           sent by mail and verbal ones avoided.

    MAIL OR MESSENGER, SENDING CARDS BY.
             See CARDS, VISITING--SENDING BY MAIL OR MESSENGER.

    MAN SERVANTS--TIPS. It is customary for a man,
           at the end of a house party, to give to the
           man servant who has acted as his valet a
           suitable tip.

    MARCHIONESS-HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor
           to remain your Ladyship's most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Most Noble the Marchioness of Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Kent,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Kent, very
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Marchioness of Kent.

    MARCHIONESS, DOWAGER--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Madam, and ends: I have
           the honor to remain your Ladyship's most
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Kent,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Kent, very
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope in both cases
           is: To the Dowager Marchioness of Kent, or
           To Mary, Marchioness of Kent.

    MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           My Lord Marquis, and ends: I have the
           honor to be your Lordship's obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Most Noble the Marquis of Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lord Kent
           and ends: Believe me, Lord Kent, very sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Marquis of Kent.

    MARQUIS.

      DAUGHTER OF. See DAUGHTER OF MARQUIS.

      WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF. See WIFE OF
           YOUNGER SON OF MARQUIS.

      YOUNGER SON OF. See SON (YOUNGER) OF MARQUIS.

    MARKING WEDDING PRESENTS. While it is not strictly
           necessary that wedding presents be marked,
           yet it is customary, and they should always
           be marked with the bride's maiden name, unless
           specially intended for the groom's individual
           use.

    MATINEES. Proper music should be provided.

           The refreshment-room should be within
           easy reach. Light dainties should be served
           occasionally to those not caring to go to the
           refreshment-room.

      DRESS. If after six o'clock, evening dress should
           be worn; otherwise, afternoon dress.

      HOST. The head of the house need not be present.

      HOSTESS. The hostess and those assisting her
           should not dance, unless all her guests are
           provided with partners or are otherwise
           entertained.

      INVITATIONS. These may be written or engraved,
           with Dancing and the hour for beginning in
           the lower left-hand corner. They should be
           sent two weeks in advance, and should be
           promptly answered.

      MEN. Gloves should be worn when dancing.
             See also BALLS. COTILLIONS. DANCES. DANCING.

    MAYOR OF A CITY--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Sir, or Your Honor, and ends: I
           have the honor, sir, to remain your obedient
           servant.

          A social letter begins: My dear Mayor
          Wilson, or, Dear Mr. Wilson, and ends:
          Believe me, most sincerely yours.

          The address on the envelope is: His Honor,
          the Mayor of Kent, John J. Wilson.

    MEN.

      ADDRESSING ENVELOPES. See ADDRESSING
           ENVELOPES--MEN.

      AFTERNOON DRESS. See AFTERNOON DRESS--MEN.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS--MEN.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS--MEN.

      BACHELORS' TEAS. See BACHELORS' TEAS--MEN.

      BALLS. See BALLS--MEN.

      BICYCLING. See BICYLING--MEN.

      BOWING. See BOWING--MEN.

      BREAKFASTS. See BREAKFASTS--MEN.

      CALLS. See CALLS--MEN.

      CARDS. See CARDS, VISITING--MEN.

      CHAPERONES. See CHAPERONES--MEN.

      CHRISTENINGS. See CHRISTENINGS--MEN.

      CONCLUSION OF LETTERS. See CONCLUSION OF A LETTER--MEN.

      COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS. See COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS--MEN.

      DANCES. See DANCES--MEN.

      DANCING. See DANCING--MEN.

      DEBUTANTE. See DEBUTANTE--MEN.

      DINNERS. See DINNERS--MEN.

      DRIVING. See DRIVING--MEN.

      DRESS. See DRESS--MEN.

      ENGAGEMENT. See ENGAGEMENT--MEN.

      EVENING DRESS. See EVENING DRESS--MEN.

      FLOWERS. See FLOWERS--MEN.

      FUNERALS. See FUNERALS--MEN.

      GARDEN PARTIES. See GARDEN PARTIES--MEN.

      GLOVES. See GLOVES--MEN.

      HIGH TEA. See HIGH TEA--MEN.

      HOUSE PARTIES. See HOUSE PARTIES--MEN.

      INTRODUCTIONS. See INTRODUCTIONS--MEN.

      INVITATIONS. See INVITATIONS--MEN.

      JEWELRY. See JEWELRY--MEN.

      LUNCHEONS. See LUNCHEONS--MEN.

      MORNING DRESS. See MORNING DRESS--MEN.

      MOURNING. See MOURNING--MEN.

      NEWCOMER, RESIDENTS' DUTY TO. See NEWCOMER,
              RESIDENTS' DUTY TO MEN.
      RIDING. See RIDING--MEN.

      SALUTATIONS. See SALUTATIONS--MEN.

      SHAKING HANDS. See SHAKING HANDS--MEN.

      STATIONERY. See STATIONERY--MEN.

      STREET-CARS. See STREET-CARS--MEN.

      STREET ETIQUETTE. See STREET ETIQUETTE--MEN.

      THEATRE PARTIES. See THEATRE PARTIES--MEN.

      TITLES. See TITLES--MEN.

      TRAVELING. See TRAVELING--MEN.

      WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS--MEN.

    MESSENGER, SENDING CARDS BY. See CARDS, VISITING--
             SENDING BY MAIL OR MESSENGER.

    MINISTER (PROTESTANT)-HOW ADDRESSED, An official
           letter begins: Reverend Dear Sir, and ends:
           I remain sincerely yours.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I beg to remain sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: The
           Reverend John J. Wilson. but if the clergyman
           holds the degree of D.D. (Doctor of
           Divinity), the address may be: The Reverend
           John J. Wilson, D.D., or Reverend Dr. John
           J. Wilson.

    MINISTER. See CLERGYMAN.

    MISS. This is the prefix both in conversation,
           correspondence, and on the visiting-card of the
           eldest daughter, the next daughter being
           known as Miss Annie Smith; but on the
           death or marriage of the eldest daughter, she
           becomes Miss Smith.

    MONOGRAMS. If men and women wish, these may
           be stamped in the latest colors on their
           stationery. When the address is stamped, it
           is not customary to stamp the monogram.

           The latest fashion in the style of monograms
           require that they should be the size of
           a ten-cent piece.

           All individual eccentricities of facsimiles
           of handwriting, etc., should be avoided.

           It is not customary to have the monogram
           on the flap of the envelope.

           If sealing-wax is used, it should be of some
           dull color.

    MORNING DRESS.
      MEN. Morning costume consists of a dark frock
           coat, with vest and light trousers. This can
           be worn at any entertainment occurring in
           the daytime--as, weddings, luncheons, receptions
           of all kinds, matinees, or ceremonious visits.

           Anything worn is admissible in morning
           dress, a business suit, cutaway, sack suit,
           hats or caps, and undressed kid gloves of a
           dark color.

           At out-of-town resorts, golf, wheeling, and
           yachting costumes suitable for outdoor sport
           may be worn in the morning.

           It is considered the correct thing for a man
           to tie his own tie instead of buying them
           ready made.

             See also AFTERNOON DRESS--MEN. EVENING
             DRESS--MEN.

    MOTHER. A mother should receive an invitation for
           any function to which her daughters are
           invited, and should go and return with them.

      DEBUTS. The mother and the elder unmarried
           daughter, prior to the debut, calls formally
           upon those who are to be invited. She
           stands at her daughter's side to receive the
           congratulations of the guests, and at a dance
           she selects the first partner to dance with the
           debutante, and at the dinner or supper is
           escorted by the most distinguished man.
             See also CHAPERONE.

    MOTHER OF BRIDE. At the wedding reception she is
           escorted by the father of the groom, and
           receives with the married couple.

           At the wedding breakfast she is escorted
           by the father of the groom.

    MOTHER OF GROOM. At the wedding reception she
           receives with the married couple.

           At the wedding breakfast she is taken in
           by the father of the bride, following after
           the ushers and the maids of honor.

    MOURNING. Those in mourning for parent, child,
           brother, or husband should not be seen at
           any public function or private entertainment
           before six months have passed.

      CARDS. These are the same size as visiting-cards.
           A black border is used, the width to be
           regulated by the relationship to the deceased
           relative.

           They should be sent to indicate temporary
           retirement from and re-entrance into society.

           Within a month after death in a family
           friends should leave cards. The persons
           receiving the same should acknowledge the
           remembrance and sympathy when they are
           ready to resume their social functions. This
           may be done by letter or card.

      MEN. Mourning cards are the same size as
           visiting-cards, and a black border is used, the
           width to be regulated by the relationship of
           deceased relative.

      WOMEN. Mourning cards should be sent, to
           indicate temporary retirement from society.
           Later cards should be sent, to indicate return
           to society.

      CHILDREN. Children under twelve need not be
           dressed in mourning, though they often are.
           Only the lightest material should be used.
           Girls of more advanced age do not wear veils,
           but crape may be worn in hat or dress,
           according to taste.

           For parent, brother, or sister, mourning is
           worn for about one year.

      MEN. Men wear mourning one year for loss of
           wife.

           A crape band should be worn around the
           hat, its width being determined by the
           nearness of the relative mourned for. It is
           usually removed after eight months.

           A widower wears mourning for one year,
           or, if he wishes, eighteen months, and for a
           brother, sister, parent, or a child, from six
           months to a year, as he desires. For the
           loss of other relatives, duration of mourning
           is generally regulated by the members of the
           family.

           The wearing of a black band on the coat
           sleeve in token of half-mourning is an
           English custom, and is somewhat practised in
           this country.

      STATIONERY-MEN. A widower uses a black
           border about one-third of an inch on his
           stationery, and this at intervals is diminished.

           All stamping should be done in black.

      WOMEN. A widow's stationery should be heavily
           bordered, and is continued as long as she
           is in deep mourning. This is gradually
           decreased, in accordance with her change of
           mourning.

           All embossing or stamping should be done
           in black.

      WEDDINGS. Mourning should never be worn at
           a wedding, but it should be laid aside
           temporarily, the wearer appearing in purple.

      WIDOWS. A widow should wear crape with a
           bonnet having a small border of white. The
           veil should be long, and worn over the face
           for three months, after which a shorter veil
           may be worn for a year, and then the face
           may be exposed. After six months white
           and lilac may be used, and colors resumed
           after two years.

      WOMEN. The mourning dress of a woman for
           parent, sister, brother, or child is the same
           as that worn by a widow, save the white
           bonnet ruche--the unmistakable mark of a
           widow.

           For parents and children, deepest mourning
           is worn at least one year, and then the
           change is gradually made by the addition of
           lighter material or half-mourning.

           For other members of the family--as, aunts,
           uncles, grandparents, cousins, etc.--black
           clothes should be worn, but not heavy
           mourning.

           Complimentary mourning is worn for three
           months; this does not necessitate crape and
           veil, but any black material can be used.

      WOMEN, FOR CHILDREN. For a child, mourning
           is usually worn for six months, thereafter
           substituting black and white.

      FOR BROTHER AND SISTER, ETC. Mourning for
           a brother or sister, step-parents, or grandparents
           is the same as for parents, but the
           time is shorter, generally about six months.
           For an aunt, uncle, or cousin the time is
           three months.

      FOR FIANCE. In the event of the death of a
           woman's betrothed shortly before the date of
           the wedding, she may wear black for a short
           period or full mourning for a year.

      FOR HUSBANDS. Mourning cards are sent out, to
           indicate that they are not making or receiving
           calls.

           Mourning is generally worn for two years,
           and sometimes much longer. Woolen
           material of the deepest black and crape
           should be worn during the first year.

           When out-of-doors a crape veil should be
           worn for a year, or at least three months,
           covering the face, or, if preferred, the veil
           may be thrown over the shoulder, and a
           small one of tulle, or other suitable material,
           edged with crape, worn over the face.

           A crape bonnet should be worn, and a very
           small white ruche may be added if desired.

           After the first year a gradual change to
           lighter mourning may be made by discarding
           the widow's cap and shortening the veil.
           Dull silks are used in place of crape,
           according to taste. In warm weather lighter
           materials can be worn--as, pique, nun's
           veiling, or white lawn.

           Black furs and sealskin may be worn.
           Precious stones, such as diamonds and pearls,
           may be used if mounted in black enamel.
           Gold jewelry should not be used. A woman
           should avoid all pretensions to excessive
           styles.

      FOR HUSBAND'S RELATIVES. A married woman
           wears mourning for her husband's immediate
           relatives.

      FOR PARENTS AND GRANDCHILDREN. Mourning
           for these persons is generally worn for one
           year. During the first six months, black
           material trimmed with crape is used, and also
           a deep veil, which is thrown over the back of
           the head and not worn over the face, as for a
           husband. After this period the mourning
           may be lightened, according to taste.

             See also DEATH IN THE FAMILY. FUNERALS.

    MR. AND MRS. CARDS ( VISITING). These cards are not
           generally used for ceremonious calls after the
           first series of return calls made by the
           bride.

           If the husband is unable, the first year
           after marriage, to make formal calls, his wife
           uses the Mr. and Mrs. cards, and such is
           accepted as a call from him. But after
           one year she should leave their separate
           cards.

           These are used on formal occasions-as,
           returning a first call, condolence, congratulations,
           or P. P. C.--when both the husband
           and wife are represented.

           When they are used the first year after
           marriage, they should have the address in
           right-hand corner and reception days in
           lower left-hand corner.

           The card should read:
           Mr. and Mrs. Thomas Wren Wilson

    MUSIC.

      WEDDINGS. The organist and the music are
           usually selected by the bride. Before her
           arrival, the organist plays some bright
           selection; but on her entering the church and
           passing up the aisle, he plays the wedding
           march.

      AFTBRNOON TEAS (FORMAL). Music is always
           appropriate on these occasions.

    MUSICALES.

      DRESS. The rule would be that at an afternoon
           affair afternoon dress would be worn, and
           evening dress at an evening affair.

      HOURS. For an afternoon musicale, the hours
           are usually from four to six. For an
           elaborate evening drawing-room concert, any hour
           may be selected.

      INVITATIONS. These are sent out two weeks
           before the event. If entertainment is in the
           evening, they should be issued by husband
           and wife. If given in honor of a prominent
           person at any hour whatever, the cards
           should be engraved, and in either case the
           word Music should appear in the lower left-
           hand corner.

           These should be acknowledged at once by
           a letter of acceptance or regret.

    N

    NAPKINS, when in use, are laid on the lap, and, when
           finished with, are not folded up unless one is a
           guest for a few days; on all other occasions
           they are left unfolded. A good plan is to
           follow the example of the hostess.

           When fruit is brought on, a small fruit
           napkin is placed across the knee or held in
           the right hand, with which to hold the fruit,
           and when it is no longer needed, it should
           be laid beside the plate.

    NAVY, SECRETARY OF--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, sir, the
           honor to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain
           most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of the Navy.

    NEW ACQUAINTANCES.

      WOMEN. New acquaintances should not be invited
           to entertainments unless agreeable to
           all concerned.

           An entertainment can be given to meet
           new acquaintances if there be some special
           reason for so doing.

           Elderly persons and professional people can
           send their cards to younger persons if they
           wish to continue acquaintance.

    NEWCOMERS.

      BALL INVITATIONS. It is allowable for a new-
           comer wishing to give a ball to borrow the
           visiting list of some friend; but she should
           enclose in each invitation a calling card of this
           friend, so that the invited ones may know
           that the friend is acting as a sponsor.

      DUTY OF. No effort should be made to obtain
           recognition of older residents.

           Visits from neighbors should be returned
           within a week. If from any reason a newcomer
           is unable to call, a note stating the
           reason should be sent.

           If visit of neighbor's male relative is desired,
           a woman may send him a written or
           verbal invitation; but if visit is not desired,
           no notice is taken of his card, in the event of
           one having been left.

      RESIDENTS' DUTY TO MEN. When calling, kinswoman
           leaves cards of all the male members
           of family who are in society. If these cards
           left by kinswoman are not followed by an
           invitation to call, it is presumed that the
           acquaintance is not desired. Men can not
           call upon women of the family of new resident,
           unless invited to do so by either verbal
           or written message.

      RESIDENTS' DUTY TO WOMEN. The newcomer
           receives the first call from the older resident,
           which should be made within a reasonable
           time. Women making the first call, leave
           their own card and those of the male members
           of the family.

           It is unnecessary to be introduced in the
           absence of letters of introduction. Visits
           should be of short duration.

    O

    OLIVES are eaten with the fingers.

    OPERA. See THEATRE.

    ORANGES, served in divided sections, sweetened, and
           the seeds removed, should be eaten with the
           fork. If served whole, cut into suitable
           portions. Remove seed and skin.

    ORGANIST AT WEDDINGS. The organist is selected by
           the bride, but the fee is paid by the groom.

    OVERCOAT--MEN CALLING ON WOMEN. When making a
           formal or brief call, the overcoat should be
           left in the hall.

    P

    P. P. C. CARDS (VISITING). These letters--standing
           for Pour prendre conge (To take leave)--are
           written in the lower left-hand corner of the
           visiting-card. These cards are used as a
           formal farewell to such friends and
           acquaintances whose friendship it is desired to
           continue.

           They may be left in person, or sent upon
           departure from city or winter or summer
           resort. They are rarely used in brief visits,
           and should only be used at the close of a
           season.

           Care should be exercised in sending them,
           as an oversight in so doing may cause the
           loss of good friends.

    PAGES AT WEDDINGS. At the wedding, if pages are
           present, they are usually dressed in satin
           court costumes, and carry the bride's train.

    PALL-BEARERS. It is not good taste to ask relatives to
           be pall-bearers. The usual number is six to
           eight elderly men for elderly person, and of
           young men for a young man. Six young
           women in white would be a suitable number
           to act as pall-bearers for a young woman.

           Pall-bearers should be asked either by note
           or by a representative of the head of the
           family of the deceased.

           The pall-bearers assemble at the house at
           the appointed hour, and there take the
           carriages reserved for them. They disperse
           after the church service.

           Except in the case of young women, carriages
           are not sent to bring pall-bearers to
           the house.

      CALLS. After accepting an invitation to act as a
           pall-bearer, a man should call at the house of
           the bereaved and leave his card.

           A few days after the funeral he should call
           again and leave his card. If he wishes, he
           may simply ask at the door after the women
           of the family.

      DRESS. The pall-bearers wear black frock coat,
           trousers, and waistcoat, a black silk hat with
           a mourning band, black shoes, and black kid
           gloves. The linen should be white

      FLOWERS. Unless there has been a request not
           to send flowers, a pall-bearer may do so after
           his first call.

           If he wishes, a few days after the funeral
           he may send flowers to the women of the
           family with his card, on which should be
           written: With the compliments of -----.

      INVITATIONS. The invitation should be promptly
           accepted or declined, and if accepted only
           illness or unavoidable absence from the city
           would excuse a man from attending.

    PAPER WEDDING. The first wedding anniversary is
           called the paper wedding, and is not usually
           celebrated. If, however, it is celebrated,
           the invitations may bear the words: No
           presents received. Congratulations should be
           extended in accepting or declining the
           invitations. Any article of paper would be an
           appropriate gift. An entertainment should
           follow.

    PARTIES. These are less formal than balls.

           They generally begin at nine or nine-thirty,
           with dancing at ten-thirty or eleven. The
           supper precedes the dancing. Those who do
           not take part in the dancing may leave
           before it begins.

      INVITATIONS. These are engraved, giving hour
           for beginning in lower left-hand corner, and
           should be sent two weeks in advance. One
           envelope only need be used. They should
           be answered promptly.

    PATRONESSES. It is customary for the management
           of any institution giving a public ball to
           formally invite six, eight, or more married
           women to act as patronesses, and for their
           names to appear on the invitations. If
           badges are worn, each patroness is sent one
           or given one at the ball-room.

           The patronesses, after being welcomed at
           the ball by the management committees, take
           their places, ready to receive the guests.

           The Committee of Arrangements should
           look after the patronesses, introduce
           distinguished guests to them, escort them to
           supper and finally to their carriages.

             See also COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS--
             PATRONESSES. DANCES.

    PEACHES should be quartered and the quarters peeled,
           then taken up by the fingers and eaten.

    PEAS are eaten with a fork.

    PLUMS AND GRAPES should be eaten one by one, and
           the pits allowed to fall noiselessly into the
           half-closed hand and then transferred to the
           plate.

    POSTAL CARDS. It is wise to restrict the use of
           postals to impersonal communications; but if
           they must be used, the message should be
           brief with an apology for its use. It is a
           good plan in addition to omit the usual My
           dear, and to sign with the initials only and
           the full surname.

    POSTPONING DINNERS See CANCELING DINNERS.

    POSTPONING WEDDINGS. See WEDDINGS--INVITATIONS
             RECALLED.

    PRECEDENCE.

      DINNERS. See DINNERS--PRECEDENCE.

      FUNERALS. See FUNERALS--PRECEDENCE.

      THEATRE. See THEATRE--PRECEDENCE.

    PRESENTS. See GIFTS.

    PRESIDENT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Sir, and ends: I have the honor to
           remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr.
           President, and ends: I have the honor to remain
           most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: President
           John Wilson.

    PRINCE, ROYAL--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Sir, may it please your Royal
           Highness, and ends: I have the honor to remain,
           sir, your Royal Highness' humble servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Sir, and
           ends: Your Royal Highness' most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To His
           Royal Highness, the Prince of Wales.

    PRINCESS, 'ROYAL-HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Madam, may it please your Royal
           Highness, and ends: Your Royal Highness'
           most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Madam, and
           ends: Your Royal Highness' most obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To Her
           Royal Highness, the Princess of Wales.

    PRIVATE WEDDINGS. These are attended only by
           intimate friends and members of the
           family, and vary but little from home weddings.

           If the family is in mourning the cards are
           issued with the name of bride and groom
           and new address, together with card having
           bride's maiden name, and the announcement
           cards are sent after the ceremony.

           Afternoon dress should be worn at an afternoon
           wedding, and evening dress at an evening
           wedding.

    PROPOSALS OF MARRIAGE. The time, manner, and details
           of proposals of marriage are appropriately
           left to the good taste and judgment
           of the groom. If the proposal is rejected,
           good taste, womanly refinement, and courteous
           consideration demand that it be kept
           an inviolate secret, and any such breach of
           confidence may be rightly deemed the act of
           a woman without taste or tact, and unworthy
           of respect.

           Proposals by women, while permissible,
           are not customary.

    PUBLIC BALLS, By public balls are meant county and
           charity balls, and balls given by social institutions
           where dancing is the main feature.
           These public balls differ from private ones in
           that all the duties of the hostess fall upon
           some committees.

           These committees would follow the same
           rules as laid down for a hostess--issuing
           engraved invitations from fourteen to seventeen
           days in advance, engaging a caterer,
           etc.

           The etiquette for a public ball is the same
           as for a private one, save that guests arrive
           and depart when they please without taking
           leave of those who receive, and men wishing
           introductions apply for them to the Floor or
           Reception Committee.

           At the cloak-rooms a small fee is paid to
           the attendant.

             SEE ALSO all entries under Balls.

      BADGES. It is customary for the men and women
           on the committees to wear on the left side of
           the breast ornamental and embroidered
           badges, with the official position designated
           on it.

      COMMITTEE. The committee at a public ball
           takes the place of the hostess, filling all her
           duties and offices.

      PATRONESSES. It is customary for the management
           formally to invite six, eight, or more
           married women to act as patronesses of the
           ball, and for their names to appear on the
           invitations. If badges are prepared for the
           patronesses, one is sent to each patroness or
           handed to her on the evening of the dance.

           The patronesses should be welcomed at
           the ball by the management, and they then
           take their position ready to receive the guests.

           The management should look after the
           patronesses, to see that they are taken into
           supper, to introduce prominent guests to
           them, and, finally, to escort the patronesses to
           their carriages.

    PUBLIC PLACES. SEE ALSO ELEVATORS. RESTAURANTS, STREET-CARS. STREET ETIQUETTE.

    R

    R. S. V. P. The use of these letters-standing
           for Repondez, s'il vous plait (Answer, if you
           please)-is decreasing. All invitations to
           which acceptances are expected should be
           answered at once. If preferred, however,
           the above abbreviations may be used on the
           following: invitations to ceremonious receptions,
           breakfasts, luncheons, dinners, and to
           meet a prominent person.

    RAILROAD-MEN. A man should remove his hat in a
           parlor-car, but not in a day coach.

    RECALLING WEDDING INVITATIONS. When from some
           good reason a wedding has to be canceled or
           postponed, the parents of the bride should
           send, as soon as possible, printed notices, giving
           reasons to all the guests.

    RECEPTIONS. Reception days are placed in the lower
           left-hand corner of visiting-cards-as, UNTIL
           LENT, or, In JANUARY-and may be either
           engraved or written.

           Daughters have no reception day of their
           own, but receive on their mother's reception
           day.

           The etiquette at receptions is the same as
           at afternoon teas.

             SEE ALSO AFTERNOON TEAS. AT HOMES.

      HOURS. Afternoon receptions are held from 4 to
           7 P.M.

           Evening receptions are held from 9 to
           11 P.M.

      INVITATIONS, ACCEPTING OR DECLINING. These
           should be acknowledged within a week, either
           by a letter accepting, or declining with regret.

      INTRODUCTIONS. The man should seek an introduction
           to any woman he wants to meet.

           The hostess makes what introductions she
           deems proper.

      DRESS. For an afternoon reception guests should
           wear afternoon dress, and for an evening reception
           evening dress.

      AFTERNOON, GIVEN BY BACHELORS. See BACHELORS' TEAS.

      EVENING. The etiquette is the same as for an
           afternoon tea (formal), save that no cards
           are left by the guests, and that the guests
           should wear evening dress.

             See also AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL).

      WEDDING. See WEDDING RECEPTIONS.

    REFRESHMENTS.

      WEDDING RECEPTIONS. The refreshments are
           placed on tables, and the guests help themselves
           or are helped by the bridesmaids.
           The groom and bride are waited upon by the
           guests.

    REGISTER, SIGNING OF. This is sometimes done by
           the bride and the groom. This takes place
           in the vestry, and the best man signs as chief
           witness and some of the guests as witnesses.

    REHEARSALS, WEDDING. Rehearsals should be held
           even for a quiet home wedding, and at a sufficiently
           early date to insure the presence of
           all who are to participate.

    REPORTERS AT WEDDINGS. If such is the wish of the
           family of the bride, the best man attends to
           the reporters, and furnishes them with the
           names of groom, bride, relatives, friends, description
           of gowns, and other suitable details.

    RESIDENCE, CHANGE OF--WOMEN. After a change of
           residence, the cards of the entire family should
           be sent out as soon as possible.

    RESTAURANTS. If at a table, and a woman bows, the
           man should rise and bow in return. If a
           man is one of a party sitting at a table, and a
           woman with her escort stops to pass greetings,
           he should rise and stand until they depart.

           One man introduced to another who is surrounded
           by male friends should rise to acknowledge
           the honor of the introduction.

           When a man is with a woman he should
           exercise great care in recognizing male acquaintances
           who may be in doubtful company.
           He should avoid being in such company
           himself when in such places.

           Smoking in restaurants is a general custom.
           The rules of the house govern this.

           All fees to the waiters should be paid by
           the one who pays the bills. If a woman is
           paying her own bill when with a man, it is
           in order for her to fee the waiter.

    RIBBONS AT CHURCH WEDDINGS. One way of
           distinguishing the pews reserved for the family,
           relatives, and dearest friends of both families
           is the placing of white ribbons at the dividing
           pews. Before the arrival of the bride,
           the ushers, in pairs, at the same time, untie
           these ribbons, and stretch them along the
           outside of these pews, and thus enclose the
           guests and bar further intrusion.

           If these ribbons are used, it is a good
           plan to enclose in the wedding invitation a
           card giving number of pew.

           The advantage of not using ribbons is the
           avoidance of any possible discrimination.

    RICE AT WEDDINGS. The throwing of rice is to be discouraged; but if it is to be done, the maid of honor should prepare packages of rice and hand them to the guests, who throw it after the bridal couple as they leave the house for their wedding trip.

    RIDING.

      MEN. When riding with a woman, a man should
           always assist her both to mount and to
           alight, even if a groom is present.

           It is customary for the woman to set the
           pace, and for the man, who always rides on
           her right, to accommodate himself to her--
           trotting, galloping, or walking his horse as
           she may do.

           He should always be ready to open all
           gates for her, and to do all things that will
           make the riding pleasant for her. If at a
           fox-hunt, this would mean that he must be
           ready to sacrifice much of his personal pleasure
           that she may enjoy herself.

      DRESS. There is a perfectly well-accepted
           dress for men who ride in the park, though
           it is open to elderly men to wear clothes less
           pronounced.

           The correct dress is full riding-breeches,
           close-fitting at the knee, leggings, a high-buttoned
           waistcoat, and a coat with the conventional
           short cutaway tails. The hat is an
           alpine or a derby, and the tie the regulation
           stock. These, with riding-gloves and a
           riding-crop, constitute the regular riding-dress
           for a young man.

           A man should always consult his tailor,
           that the dress in all its details may be strictly
           up to date.

      WOMEN--DRESS. There is a well-prescribed
           riding-dress for women as for men. The
           habit of dark material, with skirt falling just
           over the feet when in the saddle, and the
           close-fitting waist, with long or short tails,
           together with the white collar and black or
           white tie, constitute the regulation dress.
           The derby hat is smaller than formerly.
           Gloves of a dark color and a crop with a
           bone handle are always in place. Any
           jewelry, save that which is absolutely necessary,
           should be shunned.

           In summer it is permissible to modify this
           costume.

           As in the case of a man, a woman should
           consult a tailor of good practical experience,
           that her costume may be in the correct style.

    RING, ENGAGEMENT. See ENGAGEMENT RING.

    RING, WEDDING. See WEDDING RING.

    RISING FROM THE TABLE. The signal to leave the
           table is always given by the women, and the
           men rise to let the women pass. At a formal
           dinner the signal is given by the hostess.

    S

    SALT is best taken up with the tip of the knife.

    SALTED NUTS are eaten with the fingers.

    SEAT OF HONOR is at the right of the host.

    SECOND HELPING. At formal dinner parties, luncheons,
           and breakfasts, second helpings are
           never offered by the host or hostess, and
           should not be asked for by the guests. This
           is only permissible at a small dinner party
           or at the daily family meal.

           Of course, this does not apply to a second
           glass of water, for which the guest asks, or
           for wine. It is the duty of the waiter to see
           that the guest is constantly supplied.

    SECOND MARRIAGES. See WIDOWS--WEDDINGS.

    SECRETARY OF AGRICULTURE. See AGRICULTURE, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF COMMERCE. See COMMRCE, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF INTERIOR. SEE INTERIOR, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF NAVY. SEE NAVY, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF STATE. See STATE, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF TREASURY. See TREASURY, SECRETARY OF.

    SECRETARY OF WAR. SEE WAR, SECRETARY OF.

    SEEDS should be removed from the mouth with the
           aid of a fork, or dropped into the half-closed
           hand.

    SENATOR--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins:
           Sir, and ends: I have, sir, the honor to
           remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Senator
           Wilson, and ends: Believe me, most sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Senator
           John J. Wilson, or, To the Hon. John J.
           Wilson.

    SERVANTS-TIPPING. It is customary for guests leaving
           a house after a visit to tip the servants,
           unless positively requested by the hostess not
           to do so. The average tip would be one
           dollar, with more for extra attention.

    SHAKING HANDS.

      DANCES. It is not customary to shake hands at
           formal dances.

      HOST AND HOSTESS. The host and the hostess
           should shake hands with each guest as they
           arrive.

           If guest takes leave of host and hostess,
           they should shake hands. If they are sur-
           rounded by guests, a pleasant nod of farewell
           is admissible.

      MEN. At a wedding, the opera, or a dance, and
           all very formal occasions, gloves should not
           be removed when shaking hands.

           If the hostess wears gloves at any formal
           affair, a man wears his when he shakes hands
           with her. He should give a slight pressure
           only.

           A man with hands gloved should never
           shake hands with a woman without an apology
           for so doing, unless she likewise wears
           gloves. A sudden meeting, etc., may make
           a handshaking in gloves unavoidable. Unless
           the other party is gloved, a man should
           apologize.

           When men are introduced to men, they
           always shake hands. It is bad form to crush
           the hand when shaking it.

           When introduced to a woman, men should
           bow, but not offer to shake hands.

      CALLS. If the woman is seated when a man enters
           the room, she rises to greet him, and, if
           she wishes, shakes hands. She has the
           option to shake hands or not, and should
           make the first advances. It is bad form for
           him to do so.

      WOMEN. Upon introduction, a woman may
           shake hands with either men or women, but
           a slight inclination of the body, a pleasant
           smile, and an appropriate remark are more
           correct.

           A young girl, upon being introduced to an
           older woman, should await the action of the
           elder, who will shake hands if kindly disposed.

           If one person extends the hand, it should
           be accepted without the slightest hesitation,
           to avoid embarrassment.

    SIGNING LETTERS. See ADDRESSING AND SIGNING LETTERS.

    SILK WEDDINGS. This is the name of the forty-fifth
           wedding anniversary, and is now seldom observed.
           If it is, any article of silk would be
           appropriate as a gift, and congratulations
           may be extended in accepting or declining
           the invitations. The invitations may have
           the words: No presents received. An entertainment
           usually follows.

    SILVER WEDDINGS. After twenty-five years of married
           life, the silver wedding may be celebrated.
           On the invitations sent out may be
           engraved the words: No presents received.

           Congratulations may be extended in accepting
           or declining the invitation. Any article
           of silver is appropriate as a gift. An entertainment
           follows.

           At a silver wedding the invitations may be
           appropriately engraved in a silver-gray color,
           and the decorations are usually of the same
           color.

    SLIPPERS-THROWING AT WEDDINGS. The throwing of
           slippers after the bridal couple on their leaving
           the house for their wedding trip is in
           poor taste.

    SMOKING. At a dinner when the women rise, the
           men also rise and remain standing until the
           former leave the room, when cigars and coffee
           are served. Sometimes the men accompany
           the women to the drawing-room, bow, and
           then return to the dining-room for the coffee
           and cigars, where they remain about half an
           hour.

           Smoking in restaurants is a general custom,
           but the rules of the house govern it.
           Theatres provide rooms for it, hence it should
           be limited to them.

           There should be no smoking at afternoon
           entertainments, unless the men are requested
           to do so by the host and hostess.

           At balls a room for smoking is generally
           provided. Smoking is not in good taste if a
           man is going to dance, as the odor of tobacco
           clings to the clothing. There should be no
           smoking in the dressing-rooms.

           Smoking a pipe in the street is becoming
           more common. It is poor taste, however, on
           a fashionable street. At best, any smoking
           in the street is bad form.

           Expectorating on the pavement is a most
           reprehensible habit. If it must be done, a
           man should step to the curb and expectorate
           in the street.

      DANCES. Smoking should not be allowed in the
           dressing-room, but a special room should be
           provided. Men who dance should not smoke
           until leaving the house.

      IN PRESENCE OF WOMEN. Smoking in the
           street while walking with a woman should
           never be indulged in, although she seemingly
           is agreeable to it. If a man is smoking, and
           he stops to speak to a woman, he should
           throw away his cigar or cigarette.

           A man should not smoke in the presence
           of women unless bidden by them to do so.
           Few women care to say that it is disagreeable
           when asked, hence the better course is to
           await permission.

      WOMEN. If a woman has true regard for herself,
           she should not indulge in smoking; if she
           does, it should be in absolute privacy.

    SON.

      BALLS. A son should do all in his power to
           make the ball a success by finding partners
           for the women having none, seeing that the
           men are introduced to the women, and taking
           in to supper a woman without an escort.

      CARDS. When a mother is calling, she can leave
           cards of her son for the host and hostess if it
           is impossible for him to do so himself.

           A son entering society can have his cards
           left by his mother for a host and hostess.
           Invitations to entertainments will follow.

    SON (YOUNGER) OF DUKE-HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: My Lord, and ends: I have
           the honor to remain your Lordship's obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lord John J. Kent.

           A social letter begins: My dear Lord John
           J. Kent, and ends: Believe me, my dear Lord
           John, faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lord John J. Kent.

    SON (YOUNGER) OF EARL-HOW ADDRESSED, An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have the
           honor to remain your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Mr. Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable John Wilson.

    SON (YOUNGER) OF MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official letter begins: My Lord, and ends: I
           have the honor to remain your Lordship's obedient
           servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lord John J. Kent.

           A social letter begins: My dear Lord John
           J. Kent, and ends: Believe me, my dear Lord
           Kent, faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lord John J. Kent,

    SON (YOUNGER) OF VISCOUNT-HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have
           the honor to remain your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Mr. Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable John Wilson.

    SOUP should be taken from the side of the spoon
           without noise and without the plate being
           tipped. Men with mustaches are privileged
           in this respect, and may take the soup from
           the end of the spoon.

    SOUVENIRS.

      BRIDESMAIDS. These are given by the bride to
           her bridesmaids a few days before the wedding,
           and take the form of fans or jewelry of
           some kind that may be worn at the wedding.

           A good time to present them is when the
           bride gives a farewell dinner or luncheon to
           her bridesmaids.

           Failing this, they may be sent a few days
           before the wedding.

           The souvenirs should, of course, be all the
           same in value and in style.

      USHERS. The souvenirs given by the groom to
           the ushers usually take the form of scarf-pins
           or cuff-buttons. Sometimes the groom
           also gives the ushers neckties and gloves.

           A good time for their distribution is at the
           farewell bachelor dinner.

    SPONSORS. Only relatives and near friends should
           be asked to act as sponsors at a christening.
           Two women and one man are asked as sponsors
           for a girl, and one woman and two men
           for a boy, though one man and one woman
           are sufficient in either case.

           These may be invited by note or personal
           call to act as sponsors, and should answer by
           note or personal call.

           A few days before the ceremony the sponsor
           should send a christening gift addressed
           to the child, and the giver's card, with a
           suitable sentiment written on it, should be
           sent with the gift.

           A man may give some article of silver, and,
           if a wealthy relative, a bank-book for money
           deposited in the child's name.

           A woman may present the child with a
           garment, a carriage, a cradle, or some similar
           article.

           It is in good taste for the sponsors to call
           immediately on the parents, to send flowers
           to the mother, and to show that they are
           pleased with the compliment.

           The godfather at the ceremony assents to
           the vows, and later, at the drinking of the
           wine, should propose both the health of the
           child and that of its mother.

    SPOON. The spoon should never be in the cup while
           drinking, but should be left in the saucer.
           It is used in eating grapefruit, fruit salads,
           small and large fruit (when served with
           cream), puddings, jellies, porridges, preserves,
           and boiled eggs.

    SR, The letters SR. (abbreviation for Senior) are
           sometimes added to a woman's name on her
           card when her son has the same name as
           his father, and it is necessary to distinguish
           between the cards of the daughter-in-law and
           the mother-in-law.

           If both become widows, and yet wish to
           retain their husbands' Christian names, the
           daughter-in-law would add Jr. on her cards.

    STAG PARTIES. A party composed of men exclusively
           is sometimes so designated. They
           are usually informal in character, but may be
           as elaborate in detail as desired.

      DRESS. The Tuxedo coat and black tie is worn,
           unless at a formal stag party, when evening
           dress is appropriate.

    STATE, SECRETARY OF-HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, sir, the honor to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain most
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of State.

    STATIONERY.

      MEN. The variations from plainness and quietness
           in the use of stationery that are permitted
           women are denied to men. Their
           paper is never perfumed, and all fancy styles
           are in poor taste.

           For his social correspondence a man should
           use white or gray linen or bank-note unruled
           paper, folding once in the envelope.

           He may, of course, use for social correspondence
           his club stationery.

           Under no circumstances should he use his
           business stationery for social correspondence.

      WOMEN. Unruled plain white or gray paper,
           that folds once in the envelope, and black
           ink, are the standard materials for social correspondence.

           While it is permissible to use some of the
           latest fancy stationery, care should be taken
           that it is quiet in taste, and that all merely
           temporary variations are avoided.

           While it is better not to use perfumed
           paper, if any perfume is used it should be
           extremely delicate.

           Elderly women are apt to favor Irish linen
           or similar stationery.

    STRANGERS-INVITATIONS TO A BALL ASKED FOR BY FRIENDS.
      See BALLS-INVITATIONS ASKED FOR STRANGERS.

    STREET-CARS AND OTHER CONVEYANCES.

      MEN. The old custom of a man giving up his
           seat in a street-car to a woman is being gradually
           done away with. This is due largely
           to the fact that women are now so extensively
           engaged in commercial business that
           they are constant riders at the busy hours,
           end thus come into direct competition with
           men.

           A well-bred man, however, will show his
           manliness by giving any woman his seat and
           standing himself, as she is less fitted for such
           hardships and annoyances. A man should
           always give his seat to an elderly woman,
           one accompanied with children, or one apparently
           weak and sickly. In giving his seat
           to a woman, a man should politely bow and
           raise his hat.

           It is good form for a man to assist a woman
           getting on or off a car. If a man is accompanied
           by a woman when she leaves the car,
           he should help her off the car.

           A man should always be polite and courteous
           toward a conductor, as the latter's
           position is a hard and trying one.

           A man should never cross his legs or keep
           his feet extended in the passageway.

           If a man finds it necessary to crowd into a
           car already full, he should do so with consideration
           and politeness, and with an apology
           for pressing against any one. It is better to
           stand than to crowd yourself into a small
           space between those who are seated.

      EXPENSES. A man traveling with another man
           can pay the latter's fare if he wishes. But
           if he is accompanied by a woman he should
           pay her fare. If he is in the car, and other
           acquaintances, men or women, enter, they
           should pay their own fares.

      WOMEN. A woman should not look with a
           pained and injured air at the men passengers
           because no one of them has offered her a seat.
           The great influx of women into the commercial
           world, and their being thrown into direct
           competition with men, has largely done away
           with the fine old custom of men giving up
           their seats to women. The impoliteness of
           many women in accepting a seat as a matter
           of right and not of courtesy, and perhaps
           without a "Thank you," has helped largely
           to bring about the present state of affairs.
           No woman of ordinary good manners should
           fail to express her thanks for the courtesy
           proffered. If a woman is offered a seat she
           should accept it at once-without urging.

           A man may assist a woman in getting off
           a car. If a woman is accompanied by a man
           and she leaves the car, he should assist her
           to alight.

           A woman should wait till a car absolutely
           stops before she gets on or off, and she
           should face the front when leaving the car.

           If possible, a woman should have her car-fare
           handy or easy of access-preferably in
           her hand-before entering the car if it is
           crowded. A woman should avoid crowding
           into a small space between others, and it is
           better for her to stand than to occupy barely
           the edge of a seat. If it is absolutely necessary
           for her to enter a crowded car, she
           should do so with an apology to those whom
           she may crowd.

      CONDUCTOR. A conductor occupies a difficult
           and trying position, and will always appreciate
           any courtesy shown him by a woman.
           If a woman desires a transfer, she should let
           him know in ample time; if she wants any information
           from him, she should ask him when
           paying her fare, and should indicate her desire
           to leave the car at least a block ahead of
           her street. A woman should not trust to a
           conductor to remember her street, even if she
           has asked him, but should look out for the
           street herself.

      EXPENSES. If a woman is in a car and a man
           joins her, and the fare is not yet collected, she
           should pay her own fare. But if she is traveling
           with an escort she should not offer to
           pay her fare, as her escort pays the expenses.

    STREET ETIQUETTE.

      MEN. If a man is passed on the street without
           any recognition by an acquaintance, he should
           hesitate before accepting it as a direct cut, as
           it may have been an oversight. If it is repeated,
           he will know its full meaning.

           To pass a person whom one knows and to
           look straight at him without recognition is
           the rudest way of dropping an acquaintance.

           A man should avoid loud and boisterous
           behavior.

           If a man is compelled to force his way
           through a crowded street, he should do so
           courteously and with an apology to any one
           inconvenienced by his act.

           In walking three or four abreast, men
           should be careful not to obstruct the thoroughfare,
           but should quickly fall into single
           file when necessary.

           A man should greet his acquaintances on
           the street quietly and courteously, and if on
           a crowded street, should step out of the way
           of persons and be brief in his remarks.

           In all public places and conveyances a
           man should offer his seat to a woman, though
           he is not expected to do so when reserved
           seats can be obtained--as, in a theatre, at
           an opera, etc.

      ACCIDENTS. In case of accident or danger a man
           should protect the woman whom he escorts,
           and take her to a place of safety. If her
           clothing is torn, or she has met with some
           accident of which she is unaware, a man may,
           if he desires, politely raise his hat and call
           her attention to the fact. If by accident a
           man jostles a woman or steps upon her dress,
           he should raise his hat, bow, and apologize,
           whether he knows her or not.

      BOWING. A man should not bow to a woman
           until she has first recognized him, unless they
           are old acquaintances.

           A man should acknowledge the salutation
           of a woman on the street, even if he does not
           know her, as it saves her from embarrassment
           at her mistake.

           When bidding farewell to a woman after a
           conversation on the street, a man should bow
           and raise his hat.

           If a man offers his seat to a woman in a car
           or other conveyance, he should raise his hat
           and bow, while her escort acknowledges the
           courtesy by doing the same.

           When a man opens a door for a woman
           unknown to him, he should bow, while she
           enters in advance of him.

           A man should raise his hat and bow on all
           occasions when offering any courtesy to a
           woman, whether stranger or acquaintance.

           A man may bow to an elderly man or person
           of official position.

           A man may offer his services to a woman
           in crossing a crowded thoroughfare, and
           should raise his hat and bow when she is
           safely over, but should, make no comment
           unless she does so first. He may also offer
           her assistance in getting on or off a car, raising
           his hat and bowing without remark.

           If a man is accompanied by a woman and
           another man extends a courtesy to her, he
           should acknowledge it by bowing and giving
           a polite "Thank you."

           If when walking with a man a woman
           meets a male acquaintance who bows, her
           escort should raise his hat and bow, though
           the two men are strangers to each other. If
           the escort meets a man known to him, both
           men should raise their hats and bow.

      CANES AND UMBRELLAS. These should be carried
           vertically, never horizontally, thereby
           endangering other persons' eyes. Especially
           is this important when entering cars or going
           up long flights of steps-as, the stairs of the
           elevated railroad.

      CONVERSATION. A man who meets a woman,
           and desires to engage in conversation with
           her, should ask permission to accompany her.
           If this is granted, he may proceed a short
           distance, unless requested to go farther.

           When meeting a woman on the street and
           stopping to converse with her, a man should
           raise his hat and replace it, as it is not now
           in good form for a man to remain bareheaded
           until requested by the woman to replace his
           hat.

           A man should avoid stopping a woman on
           the street to engage her in conversation.

           Only an intimate acquaintance with a woman
           warrants a man joining her on the street. If
           it is not agreeable, it may be very embarrassing
           to her.

      SMOKING. A man should never smoke while
           walking with a woman on a street. Smoking
           on fashionable thoroughfares is bad form.

           A man should avoid expectorating upon a
           sidewalk, and, if it must be done, should
           walk to the curb and use the street for that
           purpose.

      WALKING. A man should not walk between two
           women, but at the side nearest the curb.

           When walking with a woman, a man
           should walk near the curb, unless passing
           an obstruction-as, a building in course of
           construction-when she should have the outer
           side to protect her from harm, or from coming
           in contact with disagreeable things.

           A man should offer his right arm to a
           woman, but this is rarely necessary in the
           daytime. It is essential, however, and
           proper for him to do so after dark.

      WOMEN. Conduct on the street should always
           be reserved. It is bad form to loudly laugh
           or to boldly glance at the passers-by, especially
           men.

           Women should never walk three or four
           abreast.

           Women may salute each other with a bow
           and a handshake, but a kiss in public is no
           longer in good form.

           During a promenade, where friends pass
           and repass, it is not necessary to exchange
           greetings to each other.

           A polite "Thank you," with a bow and a
           smile, should be the reward of any man extending
           a courtesy to a woman.

      BOWING. It is the woman's privilege to determine
           whom she will publicly recognize, and
           therefore she should bow first to all men
           whom she desires to favor. This formality
           is, however, unnecessary with intimate
           friends.

      UMBRELLAS. These should be carried vertically,
           and never horizontally under the arm.

      WALKING. If a woman is walking with a man,
           and another man stops to speak, it would be
           in exceeding bad taste to ask him to join her.

           A woman should take a man's right arm,
           but only after dark, unless for some special
           reason-as, weakness, etc.-it is necessary.

           If a woman is walking alone, and a man of
           her acquaintance stops and speaks, he may
           ask permission to accompany her farther,
           which, if agreeable, should be granted. She
           may stop for a few moments' chat, and shake
           hands if she wishes. If he stands before her
           with uncovered head, she should promptly
           ask him to replace his hat. She should not
           block the thoroughfare, and should take the
           initiative if he does not step to one side.
           If agreeable, an invitation may be extended
           to him to walk a short distance.

    SUBSCRIPTION BALLS.
      MEN. Shortly after receiving an invitation to a
           subscription ball, a man should leave a card
           for the patroness inviting him.

      INVITATIONS. In addition to the regular invitations,
           it is customary to guard against the
           admission of persons not really invited by
           the use of vouchers to be shown at the
           hall door, or some similar precaution is
           taken.

           When a subscriber sends an invitation and
           a voucher, he should send in the same
           envelope one of his calling cards.

    SUNDAY CALLS. Informal calls may be made on
           Sunday after three o'clock by business and
           professional men, provided there are no religious
           or other scruples on the part of those receiving
           the calls.

           Men should wear afternoon dress.

    SUPPERS GIVEN BY MEN--WOMEN. A young woman
           may accept a man's invitation, provided she
           has the consent of her mother or guardian,
           and is assured that a chaperone will be present.

    SUPPERS--MEN. Suppers are generally for men.
           The hours are from ten to eleven. A man can
           give such entertainments in bachelor apartments
           or restaurant, and if women are invited,
           chaperones should be present.

           The invitations may be given personally,
           written, or a visiting-card may be used,
           giving hour and date. If the supper is given in
           honor of a special guest, engraved cards or
           note sheets are used.

          Suppers may be of various kinds--such as
          Fish, Game, Wine, Champagne.

    SUPPERS AND THEATRE PARTIES.
      MEN. A man should not invite a young woman
           to a theatre party or supper without inviting
           her mother or a chaperone to accompany
           them. At large theatre parties or suppers,
           when there are ten or more guests, several
           chaperones should be invited. Any married
           or elderly unmarried woman can act as
           chaperone, care being taken that they are
           well-known and agreeable to all, as much of the
           pleasure of the evening depends upon them.
      CARRIAGES. A conveyance holding a large party
           can be sent to take invited guests to the
           entertainment. The chaperone should be
           called for first, and should be the last one to
           be left at home upon returning. The chaperones
           may use their own carriages and call
           for guests if they desire. If the chaperones
           call for the guests, the men can be met at the
           place of amusement. Conveyances should
           be provided for guests.

    SUPPERS GIVEN BY BACHELORS.
             See BACHELORS' SUPPERS.

    T

    TABLE ETIQUETTE. It is correct to take a little of all
           that is offered, though one may not care for it.
           Bend slightly over the plate when carrying
           the food to the mouth, resuming upright
           position afterward.

           When drinking from a cup or glass, raise it
           gracefully to the mouth and sip the contents.
           Do not empty the vessel at one draught.

           Guests should not amuse themselves by
           handling knife or fork, crumbling bread, or
           leaning their arms on the table. They should
           sit back in their chairs and assume an easy
           position.

           A guest at a dinner should not pass a plate
           or any article to another guest, or serve the
           viands, unless asked to do so by the hostess.

           Upon leaving the table, push the chair
           back far enough to be out of the way of others.

      ACCIDENTS. Accidents, or anything that may be
           amiss at the table, should be unobserved by a
           guest unless he is the cause of it. In that
           event some pleasant remark as to his awkwardness
           should be made and no more. The
           waiter should attend to the matter at once.

           If a fork or a spoon is dropped it should
           not be picked up by the guest, but another
           used, or ask the waiter to provide one.

      CONVERSATION. Aim at bright and general conversation,
           avoiding all personalities and any
           subject that all cannot join in. This is
           largely determined by the character of the
           company. The guests should accommodate
           themselves to their surroundings.

             See also FINGER-BOWL, KNIFE AND FORK,
             SECOND HELPING, SEEDS, SPOON, TOOTHPICKS,
             WINES, and names of individual fruits and
             foods--as, APPLES, BREAD, etc.

    TALKING--THEATRES. Conversation during the progress
           of the play or the opera should be
           avoided and confined to the intermissions.
           The theatregoer should avoid all noise, gestures,
           or actions that would annoy others.

           A man would be justified, when annoyed by
           a person talking loud near him, in asking
           him politely to speak lower.

    TEAS.

      Invitations. These need no acknowledgment.

      Given by bachelors.
             See BACHELORS' TEAS.

      Afternoon.
             See AFTERNOON TEAS.

      High.
             See HIGH TEA.

    TELEPHONE INVITATIONS. Telephone invitations should
           be sent only to those with whom the utmost
           intimacy exists, and who will pardon the
           informality.

    THEATRE. A young man may invite a young woman
           to the theatre or opera, even if he has but a
           slight acquaintance with her, but of course
           he should secure the permission of her parents
           or chaperone.

           It is correct for the young man to inquire
           if the young woman prefers a box, or, if not,
           he should state in what part of the house he
           proposes to secure seats. This will enable
           her to determine how to dress.

           If the young woman wears street toilette,
           her escort may take her in any public conveyance,
           but if she wears evening dress, he
           should provide a carriage.

           At the theatre he should precede the woman
           down the aisle to the seat or box; but if it is
           the latter, he should open the door and wait
           for her to pass.

           A man may use his judgment as to the aisle
           seat. If a better view can be had, or seemingly
           objectionable people are next the inside
           seat, it is perfectly proper to give the woman
           the aisle seat.

           A man should never leave his companion
           between the acts. The custom of both men
           and women going into the foyer at that time
           is a growing one, and is a relief to the
           audience.

           Refreshments at some fashionable place
           may follow after the entertainment.

           For a man to call on an acquaintance in an
           opera box does not relieve one of the duty of
           making a formal call in return for social
           favors.

      BONNET. A woman of any consideration will
           either wear no bonnet at all or remove it as
           soon as the curtain is raised.

           It would be in place for a man or woman
           whose view is hampered by a bonnet to politely
           ask the wearer to remove it, and when
           it is done, to thank her.

      MEN--LEAVING CARDS. After a theatre party
           given by a man, he should call within three
           days on the woman he escorted or leave his
           card.

      PRECEDENCE. In entering a theatre a man precedes
           the women of his party, but after he
           has handed his coupons to the ushers he
           gives the women precedence, and follows
           them to their seats.

      TALKING. Conversation during the progress of
           the play or the opera should be avoided, and
           confined to the intermissions.

           The theatregoer should avoid all noise,
           gestures, or actions tending to annoy others
           or to render himself conspicuous.

           A man would be justified, when annoyed
           by a person talking loud near him, in asking
           him politely to speak lower.

    THEATRE AND OPERA PARTIES.

      GIVEN BY MEN. A man giving a theatre or
           opera party should secure one or more
           chaperones if women are to be present.

      CALLS. The host should call upon his guests
           within three days or a week after the event.

      CARRIAGES. The host may, if he choose, send
           carriages or a stage to collect all the guests.
           This is a formal and agreeable way to begin
           the evening's pleasure. The chaperone
           should be called for first. A more informal
           way is quite popular. The invitations having
           been given and accepted, the host informs
           each of his guests as to the others, and leaves
           a ticket with each one. All then meet
           informally at the place of amusement. If a
           dinner is given before the entertainment,
           carriages are provided to convey the guests
           to the theatre.

      CHAPERONE. A chaperone should always be
           present if women are to be members of the
           party. And if a stage or carriage calls for
           the guests, it should call first for the
           chaperone.

           The chaperone who acts as hostess should
           decide the hour to close the festivities.

      DINNERS. If a dinner is given before the performance,
           it is generally given at six o'clock,
           the usual customs being followed. If preferred,
           the dinner may follow the performance,
           and may be given at any fashionable
           restaurant or hotel. If it is given before the
           play, at its termination the guests are conveyed
           in carriages or stage to the theatre at
           the expense of the host.

           After the entertainment it is a good plan
           for the party to return to the banqueting-room
           to partake of slight refreshments.

      DRESS. Men wear evening dress. Women wear
           full evening dress.

      INVITATIONS. He may invite his guests in person
           or by note. In either case he should secure
           the parents' permission to allow the
           young women to attend, and should be ready
           to supply all information regarding the men
           who will be present, and also the chaperones.

      MEN. The escorts should see the women home
           unless they are called for by the male members
           of their families, in which case they may
           be accompanied to their conveyances. If a
           young woman is called for by her maid in a
           carriage, her escort may take her home.

           Intimacy of the parties largely regulates
           the etiquette of such occasions. They can
           decide whether evening or street dress shall
           be worn, and seat themselves accordingly.
           A carriage should be provided.

           When entering an opera or theatre box for
           a short call, a man should stand and bow,
           making some pleasant remark to the chaperone.
           If there is an empty chair, he may sit
           and talk a few minutes and retire as others
           enter.

      WOMEN. Between the acts it is perfectly proper
           to go into the foyer with the escort, who
           should carry the woman's wraps and see that
           all her wants are attended to. Should she
           desire anything, she should call on him first.

           The hat or bonnet should be removed.

           In a box the women occupy the front row
           while the men sit or stand in the rear.

           A woman should avoid conspicuous
           manners, loud conversation, laughing, or acting
           in any way to attract attention.

      GIVEN BY WOMEN. This is a popular form of entertainment
           during the season. They are
           given by married women, and the guests are
           invited by note. A dinner is given at the
           house or at a restaurant before the departure
           for the opera or play. Refreshments
           may also be given after the entertainment at
           either the house or restaurant. At the dinner
           the same ceremonies are followed as to
           arrangements of guests and escorts as at any
           formal dinner.

    TOASTS--WEDDINGS. Toasts to the bride and groom
           are customary at the wedding breakfast or
           supper.

           If the groom gives a farewell bachelor dinner,
           he should propose a toast to the bride.

    THEATRE PARTIES. See also CHAPERONE-MEN.
     CHAPERONE-THEATRE.

    THIRD PERSON-USED IN CORRESPONDENCE. While it
           was formerly the correct usage to begin
           formal communications in the third person, it
           is now the custom to begin such letters: MY
           DEAR MRS SMITH, or MADAM.

           The third person would be used only in
           writing to a workman, a strange servant, or
           a business firm.

    TIN WEDDING. After ten years of marriage, occurs
           the tin wedding. The invitations sent out
           may have the words: NO PRESENTS RECEIVED.
           Congratulations may be extended in accepting
           or declining the invitation.

           Every conceivable device made of tin is
           appropriate as a gift, but, as these are limited,
           ingenuity may be displayed in getting up
           oddities. An entertainment may follow.

    TIPPING.
      At balls. It is not customary to tip the servants
           at a private ball, but at a public one
           it is usual to give a tip to the attendant at
           the cloak-room.

      At christenings. The father usually gives
           the nurse at a christening a sum of money,
           and the mother gives her some article of
           dress or piece of jewelry.

      At house; parties. See HOUSE PARTIES. GUESTS.
           TIPPING SERVANTS. Also under names of
           servants--as, COACHMAN.

    TITLES.
      MEN'S CARDS. Men having titles use them before
           their names--as, REVEREND, REV. MR.,
           REV. DR., Army and Navy titles, and
           officers on the retired list.

           LL.D. and all professional titles are placed
           after the name. Political and judicial titles
           are always omitted.

           Physicians may use DR. before or M.D.
           after their names. On cards intended for
           social use, office hours and other professional
           matters are omitted.

      WOMEN'S CARDS. The same principles govern
           the titles on women's cards, with the addition
           that women should never use titles of their
           husbands.

    TOOTHPICKS should not be used in public. If necessity
           requires it, raise the napkin over the
           mouth, with the hand behind it, using the
           toothpick as quickly as possible.

    TOWN, RETURNING TO-WOMEN. Cards of the entire
           family should be sent by mail to all acquaintances
           when returning after a prolonged
           absence.

           When using cards, if out of town, the
           place of a woman's permanent residence can
           be written on the card thus: NEW YORK.
           PHILADELPHIA.

    TRAVELERS' VISITING-CARDS. A woman visiting a place
           for a length of time should mail to her friends
           a visiting-card containing her temporary address.

           A man in a similar situation should call
           upon his friends, and if he does not find
           them at home should leave his card.

    TRAVELING.

      MEN WITH WOMEN. When traveling with a
           woman, a man should see to the checking
           and care of her baggage.

      MEN. As it is exceedingly trying and difficult
           for a woman to stand in a railroad train while
           it is in motion, it is the height of good manners
           for a man to offer her his seat and to
           insist on her taking it.

      EXPENSES. On a short boat or railroad trip a
           man should pay the expenses of a woman
           who accompanies him by his invitation. But
           on a long trip she should insist on paying
           her share, and he should accept her decision.
           Of course, he is at liberty, however, to pay
           all the expenses of slight entertainments-as,
           fruit, magazines, etc.

           He should see to the care of her baggage
           and all other details.

      PARLOR-CAR. When traveling a long distance
           accompanied by a woman, a man should secure
           seats in the parlor-car.

           While it is admissible to offer assistance to
           a woman traveling in a parlor-car without an
           escort, it should be done in the most polite
           and delicate manner, and be perfectly agreeable to her.

      WOMEN. If a woman arrives at a strange place,
           especially a large city, and no one meets her,
           she should ask the station porter to attend to
           her baggage and all such details, and, if
           traveling farther, to see to her ticket and to
           find for her the right train.

           If at the end of her journey she gives him
           the address she desires to go to and her trunk
           checks, he should procure a carriage for her.
           This saves her much worry and annoyance
           and needless risk.

           The same suggestions apply to steamboat
           travel.

      EXPENSES. If a woman is asked by a man to
           take a short boat or railroad trip, he should
           pay her fare and all other expenses. But if
           on a long trip--as, a summer outing--and she
           is escorted by a man, she should insist on
           paying her own fare and all expenses, allowing
           him, however, to pay the expenses of
           slight entertainment--as, fruit, magazines,
           etc.

      PARLOR-CAR. Her escort should attend to all
           details of traveling. If she is traveling
           alone, she should always ride in the parlor-car
           and have the porter attend to her wants.
           While it may be proper to accept in a parlor-car
           attentions from a man if he is accompanied
           by a woman, the greatest caution is
           required if he is alone; in fact, it is well to be
           on one's guard, when traveling alone, against
           the attentions of both men and women.

    TREASURY, SECRETARY OF--HOW ADDRESSED. An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, Sir, the
           honor to remain your most obedient servant

           A social letter begins: My Dear MR. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain
           most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary Of Treasury.

    TROUSSEAU, WEDDING. The bride exhibits the trousseau
           at a dinner given to the bridesmaids and
           maid of honor a few days before the wedding.

    TURNING DOWN CORNER OF VISITING-CARDS. This
           should not be done.

    TUXEDO. The Tuxedo coat and waistcoat are worn
           at all informal affairs when no women are
           present, such as small theatre parties (when
           not occupying a box), bowling and card
           parties, restaurants, and the like.

           It may be worn on the street in the
           evening with a low hat. A black tie should
           always be worn, and never, under any
           circumstances, a white one.
             See also EVENING DRESS--MEN.

    U

    UMBRELLAS.
      MEN CALLING ON WOMEN. When making a
           formal or brief call, the umbrella should be
           left in the hall.

      CARRYING. Umbrellas should be carried
           vertically, never horizontally, thereby endangering
           other persons' eyes. Especially is this
           important when entering cars or going up long
           flights of steps--as, at an elevated railroad
           station.

    USHERS. A sufficient number of ushers should be
           provided for to allow of two for each aisle.
           A good plan is to have one selected as the
           master of ceremonies, and for him to go to
           the church on the wedding-day in ample
           time to personally see that all the details
           have been carried out. They should be
           present at all rehearsals.

           The ushers are usually presented by the
           groom with some small trinket, such as a
           pin, as a souvenir of the occasion.

      CALLS. The ushers should call upon the married
           couple as soon as the latter have returned
           from their wedding trip.

      CHURCH. The ushers should arrive at the
           church before the guests.

           Each usher should have a list of all the
           intended guests for whom special places are set
           aside, and should check off the names of the
           guests as they arrive. He should know the
           various guests and where to place them; but
           if he does not know them personally, he
           should consult his list.

           The upper ends of the middle aisles of
           both sides are usually reserved for invited
           guests, and are distinguished from the rest
           of the church by having a white ribbon or a
           string of flowers stretched across the aisle.
           The immediate family and special guests
           occupy the front seats, the family and the
           guests of the bride taking the left side and
           those of the groom the right side of the
           aisle. Other guests should be given the best
           seats, according to their priority in arriving.

           It is in bad taste for an usher to reserve
           seats for his own friends as against the
           first-comers.

           In seating guests, the usher should give
           his left arm to a woman and escort her to
           her seat while her escort follows.

           Before the arrival of the bridal party the
           ushers take the ribbons at either end, and,
           walking the length of the aisle, close it
           against intrusion. Upon the arrival of the
           bride they form in pairs in the vestibule and
           lead the procession, followed by the bridesmaids,
           also in pairs. When they approach
           the altar they separate, one-half to the right
           and one-half to the left. The bridesmaids do
           likewise, and stand in front of the ushers.

           At the conclusion of the ceremony they
           follow last in the procession to the vestibule,
           where, after giving their best wishes to the
           bride and congratulations to the groom, they
           hasten as soon as possible to the bride's home
           to assist in introducing and meeting the
           guests at the reception or breakfast.

     DRESS. At a morning or afternoon wedding they
           wear black frock coats.

           At an evening wedding they wear full
           evening dress, also white kid gloves, which are
           not removed during the ceremony.
           Hats should be left in the vestibule.

      FLOWERS. If the boutonniers are given by the
           bride, they should go to her house to receive
           them and to have her place them in the lapels
           of their coats; or the boutonniers may be
           kept at the church in the care of the sexton.

      GLOVES. For morning or an afternoon wedding
           the gloves are gray. At an evening wedding
           the gloves are white kid. The gloves are
           not removed during the ceremony.

      JEWELRY. They wear the scarf-pins or cuff-
           buttons given to them by the groom.

      NECKTIES. At a morning or afternoon wedding
           the neckties are usually of some delicate color.
           At an evening wedding the neckties are
           white, as is customary with evening dress.

      WEDDING BREAKFAST. The ushers pair off with
           the bridesmaids, and are usually seated at a
           table assigned to them.

      WEDDING RECEPTIONS. The ushers, should
           introduce the guests to the groom and bride,
           calling the latter "Mr. and Mrs. A.," beginning
           with the relatives and friends, and continuing
           with the others till all have been introduced.
           In introducing the guests, the usher should
           offer his arm to the woman, and if not
           knowing her, should ask her her name, while her
           escort follows and is introduced at the same
           time. The bride may request the usher to
           introduce the guests to the parents.

    V

    VALET.

      TIPS. It is customary for a man leaving after a
           house party to give to the valet who has
           waited upon him at least one dollar and more,
           in proportion for added attention.

      WITH MASTER ON VISIT. As a general rule,
           few American men take their valets with
           them when they visit. But when such is the
           case, the valet would wait upon his master,
           and should give as little care to the household
           as possible.

    VEIL

      MOURNING. See Widow-Mourning.

      WEDDING. This should be white. While its
           length depends upon the wishes of the bride,
           the long veil is more in keeping with the
           traditions and customs of the ceremony.

           Verbal Invitations. All invitations should be sent
           by mail, and verbal invitations avoided if
           possible; if one is given, it should be
           followed by one in writing.

    VICE-PRESIDENT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Sir, and ends, I have, sir, the honor
           to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr.
           Wilson, and ends: I have the honor to remain
           most sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: The Vice-
           President, John J. Wilson.

    VISCOUNT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: My Lord, and ends: I have the honor
           to be your Lordship's obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: The
           Right Honorable Viscount Wilson.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lord
           Wilson, and ends: Believe me, my dear Lord
           Wilson, very sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Viscount Wilson.

    VISCOUNTESS--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor to
           remain your Ladyship's most obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope reads: To the
           Right Honorable, the Viscountess of Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Kent,
           and ends: Believe me, dear Lady Kent,
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope reads: To the
           Viscountess of Kent.

    VISCOUNT.

      DAUGHTER OF. See Daughter of Viscount.

      WIFE OF YOUNGER SON. See Wife of Younger
           Son of Viscount.

      YOUNGER SON OF. See Son (Younger) of Viscount.

    Visiting-cards. See Cards, Visiting.

    VISITORS TO TOWN--CARDS. Visitors to town should
           send cards to every one whom they desire to
           see, with the address written on the cards.

    VOUCHERS. These are safeguards against the
           admission of uninvited guests at a subscription
           ball, and take the form of cards to be shown
           at the door.

           When a person sends one of these vouchers
           and an invitation to a person, he should en-
           close one of his calling cards.

    "WALLFLOWERS." This is the name commonly
           applied to young women at a ball who do
           not dance because of lack of partners. It
           should be the aim of the hostess, with the
           aid of her sons and daughters, to find
           partners for such young women.

    W

    WAR, SECRETARY OF--HOW ADDRESSED, An official
           letter begins: Sir, and ends: I have, sir, the
           honor to remain your most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: My dear Mr. Wilson,
           and ends: I have the honor to remain most
           sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: Hon. John
           J. Wilson, Secretary of War.

    WEDDING.

      BREAKFAST. See Wedding Reception or Breakfast.

      CAKE. At the conclusion of the wedding break-
           fast the cake is placed before the bride, who
           first cuts a piece, and then it is passed to the
           others. More often it is put up in small
           white boxes and given to the guests, or
           the boxes containing the cake are placed on a
           table in the hallway, and the guests each
           take one on their departure.

      DAY. The wedding-day is named by the bride,
           and her mother's approval is asked by the
           groom.

           It is not customary for the bride to see the
           groom on the wedding-day till she meets him
           at the altar.

      KISS. The kiss in the ceremony is being done
           away with, especially at church weddings.
           Only the bride's parents and her most
           intimate friends should kiss her, and for others
           to do so is no longer good form.

      RECEPTIONS OR BREAKFASTS. The married
           couple, on arriving at the house of the bride,
           place themselves in a convenient location,
           and, assisted by the best man, maid of honor,
           and the parents of both parties, receive the
           invited guests. Congratulations are given
           to the groom and best wishes to the bride.

           A reception is more often given than a
           breakfast, as it allows more invitations and
           more freedom, and the refreshments are
           placed on the tables, so that the guests help
           themselves or are served by the bridesmaids.

           The guests wait upon the married couple.

           At a breakfast, when the congratulations
           are over, the breakfast is announced, and
           the married couple lead the way to the table
           reserved for them. Parents of both parties,
           the best man, and the maid of honor are
           usually placed at this table.

           Guests leave a card for the host and hostess
           and another for the married couple.

           Invitations are sent with the wedding
           invitations, but only to the nearest relatives and
           friends.

           They should be immediately acknowledged,
           either by letter of acceptance or declination
           with regret.

      TRIP. All details should be arranged before-
           hand by the best man, who knows the
           destination, and should keep it an inviolate
           secret, revealing it only in case of accident.

           It is becoming the fashion for the married
           couple to do away with the trip, and instead
           to begin their married life in their own home.

      VEIL. This should be white. While its length
           depends upon the wishes of the bride, the
           long veil is more in keeping with the
           traditions and customs of the wedding ceremony.

      WOMEN-CARDS. When invitations have been
           received to the church but not to the
           wedding reception, cards should be sent to the
           bride's parents and to the bridal couple.

    WEDDINGS.

      AISLE PROCESSION. See Weddings-Procession
                      Up the Aisle.

      ANNIVERSARIES. See Anniversaries-Wedding.

      ANNOUNCEMENTS. Announcement cards are sent
           the day after the wedding, and need not be
           acknowledged. They should be prepared
           beforehand and ready to be mailed. The
           expense is borne by the family of the bride.
           At a home or a private wedding, announcement
           cards can be sent to friends out of town.

      AT HOME. See Home Weddings.

      BEST MAN. See Best Man.

      BEST WISHES. Best wishes should be given to
           the bride and congratulations to the groom.

      BOUQUETS. The bouquet carried by the bride is
           furnished by the groom, who may also provide
           bouquets for the bridesmaids if he wishes.

      BRIDE. See Bride.

      BRIDESMAIDS. See Bridesmaids.

      CAKE. See Wedding Cake.

      CALLS. See Weddings-Invitations-Calls.

      CARDS OF ADMISSION TO CHURCH. These cards
           are used at all public weddings held in
           churches, and when used no one should be
           admitted to the church without one. They
           are sent with the wedding invitations.

           They are kept in stock by the stationer,
           and are not expensive.

      CARDS, VISITING, AFTER MARRIAGE. Mr. and
           Mrs. cards are used by the wife only within
           one year after the marriage, after which
           separate cards are in order. These Mr. and
           Mrs. cards are used in sending gifts,
           congratulations, condolence, and at ceremonious
           affairs, when both the husband and wife are
           represented.

      CARRIAGES. Carriages should be provided to
           take the bride and her family to the church
           and back to the house, and also the guests
           from the church to the receptions.

           The expense is borne by the family of the
           bride, save for the carriage used by the
           groom, which takes him and the best man to
           the church, and later takes the married
           couple to the house, and after the reception,
           to the station.

      CHOIR-BOYS. See CHOIR-BOYS AT WEDDINGS.

      CONGRATULATIONS. Congratulations may be
           sent with letter of acceptance or declination
           of an invitation to a wedding to those
           sending the invitations. And if acquaintance
           with bride and groom warrant, a note of
           congratulations may be sent to them also.

           Guests in personal conversation with the
           latter give best wishes to the bride and
           congratulations to the groom.

      CHURCH. See BEST MAN--CHURCH. BRIDE--CHURCH.
           BRIDESMAIDS--CHURCH. GROOM--CHURCH. USHERS-CHURCH.

      DANCES. It is not usual to have dances after the
           wedding.

      DEPARTURE OF MARRIED COUPLE. See WEDDINGS--MARRIED
           COUPLE.

      DRESS. See BEST MAN--DRESS. BRIDE--DRESS.
             GROOM-DRESS. WEDDINGS-GUESTS-DRESS,
             ETC.

      EXPENSES. All the expenses are borne by the
           bride's family, except the fees for the license,
           clergyman, organist, and sexton. The wedding-ring,
           the carriages for the groom, ushers,
           best man, and the carriage which takes away
           the married couple, are also paid for by the
           groom.

           He also furnishes souvenirs to the maid of
           honor and bridesmaids, best man and ushers,
           and all expenses of the wedding trip.

           If the groom gives a farewell bachelor dinner,
           he bears all expenses.

      FAREWELL BACHELOR DINNERS. See Groom-
          Farewell Dinner.

      FAREWELL BRIDAL LUNCHEON. See Bride--
          Farewell Luncheons.

      FEES. The wedding fee, preferably gold or
           clean bills in sealed envelope, is given by the
           best man to the officiating clergyman.
           Custom leaves the amount to the groom, who
           should give at least five dollars or more, in
           proportion to his income and social position.
           The clergyman usually gives the fee to his
           wife.

      FLOWER GIRLS. See Flower Girls.

      FLOWERS are in general use. The quantity and
           quality of floral decorations must depend
           upon the taste and the wealth of the parties
           concerned.

      BRIDE. The bride, if she desires, carries at the
           wedding ceremony a bouquet given by the
           groom. Flowers are sometimes dispensed
           with, and a Prayer-Book used.

      CHURCH. In addition to the palms in the chancel,
           a string of flowers or white ribbons is stretched
           across the middle aisle, to reserve this place
           for the immediate family and specially invited guests.

      USHERS. Boutonnieres, provided by the bride's
           family, should be given to the sexton by the
           florist on the wedding-day. They may be
           made of lilies of the valley, white roses, or
           the like.

           Sometimes the ushers call at the house of
           the bride to have her fix them in the lapel of
           their coats.

      GIFTS. The nearest members of each family
           should arrange among themselves what gifts
           to send, and thus avoid duplicates.
           Expensive presents are sent only by most intimate
           friends, and articles of utility by relatives or
           near friends. All gifts should be sent within
           two months of date of marriage, and should
           have thereon the woman's maiden name,
           initial cipher, or monogram, and should be
           acknowledged by the bride at the earliest
           moment, and not later than ten days after
           her marriage.

           It is not in good taste to make an ostentatious
           display of the gifts, and if they are exhibited,
           the cards of the donors should be removed,
           and only intimate friends invited.

           Those sending gifts should have the courtesy
           of an invitation to the wedding breakfast
           or reception.

           If any gifts are sent to the groom, they
           should bear his initial.

           A wedding invitation does not necessarily
           imply that a gift must be sent, as the sending
           of a gift is optional.

      GROOM. See Groom.

      GUESTS-BREAKFASTS OR RECEPTIONS. The
           invited guests leave the church for the bride's
           residence, and there are introduced by the
           ushers to the married couple and those standing
           up with them. If the guests are unknown to
           the ushers, they should give their names to
           one of them, who offers his left arm to the woman,
           while her escort follows and is introduced at the same time.

           At the breakfast, guests are usually assigned places,
           but, if not, may take any
           seat. Only the specially invited guests await
           the departure of the married couple, which
           ends the reception or breakfast.

           If boxes of wedding-cake are placed on a
           table, each guest takes one on his departure.

      GUESTS-CALLS. Invited guests should call at
           least within ten days and leave their cards.

      DRESS. Broadly speaking, at a morning or afternoon
           wedding the guest wears afternoon dress,
           and at an evening wedding evening dress.
           From the latter rule there are no deviations
           possible, but in the former there is
           greater latitude. Thus it would be possible
           for a man to wear a black cutaway coat at
           an afternoon wedding.

      MEN. If the wraps are not left in the carriage,
           they are removed in the vestibule and are
           carried on the arm into the pew. A man
           follows the woman, who is escorted to the
           pew by the usher. At the end of the ceremony
           the guests should not leave until the
           immediate family have passed out.

           Guests who are not invited to the breakfast
           or reception should not take offense, as
           the number present on such occasions is
           necessarily limited. These guests may seat
           themselves or are seated by the ushers, but
           not in the pews reserved for the family and
           specially invited guests.

      WOMEN. No one should be present at a wedding
           in mourning, and it should be laid aside temporarily
           even by the mother, who wears
           purple velvet or silk. Women on entering
           the church take the usher's left arm, and are
           escorted to the pew, while their escort follows
           behind.

           If they are immediate members of the
           family or are specially invited guests, they
           should give their names to the usher that he
           may seat them in the places reserved for
           them.

      HATS OF GROOM AND OF BEST MAN. To do
           away with the possibility of the best man
           having to take care of the hats of groom and
           best man during the wedding ceremony, it
           is a good plan for both groom and best man
           to leave them in the vestry, and to have them
           carried out to the front of the church, ready
           for them at the end of the ceremony.

      HOME See Home Weddings.

      HOST. See Father of Bride.

      HOSTESS. See Mother of Bride.

      HOURS. Any hour from nine in the morning to
           nine in the evening is appropriate.

           The morning hours are usually selected for
           quiet home affairs; twelve o'clock, or high
           noon, is still considered as the fashionable
           hour, while from three to six is the hour
           most convenient for all concerned.

           Evening weddings are not very convenient,
           chiefly because it is not as easy to handle the
           details as in the daytime.

      INVITATIONS. The woman's parents, guardians,
           or others give the wedding, send out the invitations,
           and bear all the expense of engraving and sending
           out the same. They are issued in the name of the
           one giving the wedding, and should be sent to
           near-by friends about twenty days in advance of
           the weddingday and earlier to out-of-town friends.
           With them are sent the invitation to the wedding
           breakfast or reception, and also the card of
           admission to the church.

           The groom should supply a list of names
           of such persons as he desires to have present,
           designating his preference for those to be
           present at the breakfast or reception.

           In addressing wedding invitations, two
           envelopes are used. The inner one, unsealed,
           bears the name only of the person addressed,
           and is enclosed in another envelope, sealed,
           bearing the address of the person invited.

           Parents should, of course, order these
           invitations of a fashionable dealer in stationery,
           that good taste may be observed.

           If the invitation contains an invitation to
           the breakfast or reception, it should be accepted
           or declined at once, and the answer
           sent to those issuing the invitation. If the
           invitation does not include a breakfast or
           reception invitation, no acknowledgment is
           necessary.

           Should the wedding, however, be at home,
           and the guests limited in number, an
           acknowledgment should be sent.

           If the invitations bear the letters R. S. V. P.
           an acknowledgment is necessary.

      BRIDESMAIDS. At a large church wedding several
           invitations are usually given to the
           bridesmaids for their own personal use.

      CALLS. Very intimate friends can call personally.
           Friends of the groom who have no
           acquaintance with the bride's family should
           send their cards to those inviting them.

           Those who do not receive with wedding
           invitations and announcements At Home
           cards should not call, but consider themselves
           dropped from the circle of acquaintances
           of the married couple.

      CARDS, LEAVING. If a person is invited to a
           wedding at a church, but not to the reception
           or breakfast, a card should be left or mailed
           both to the bride's parents and to the
           married couple.

           Those present at the ceremony should
           leave cards in person for those inviting them,
           and if this is not possible, they can send
           them by mail or messenger.

           Those invited but not present should send
           cards to those who invited them.

      RECALLED. When for some good reason a
           wedding has to be canceled or postponed,
           the parents of the bride should, as soon as
           possible, send printed notices, giving the
           reasons, to all the invited guests.

      JOURNEY. See Wedding Trip.

      MAID OF HONOR. See Maid of Honor.

      MARKING GIFTS. See Marking Wedding Gifts.

      MARRIED COUPLE. Immediately after the wedding
           breakfast or reception, the bride, with
           her maid of honor, retires to change her
           clothes for those suitable for travel. The
           groom, with his best man, does likewise, and
           waits for his wife at the foot of the stairs.

           As she comes down the stairs she lets fall
           her bridal bouquet among the bridesmaids,
           who strive to secure it, as its possession is
           deemed a lucky sign of being the next bride.

           As the couple pass out of the front door
           it is customary for the guests to throw after
           them, for luck, rice, rose leaves, flowers, old
           shoes, etc.

           The form to be used in signing the hotel
           register is: Mr. and Mrs. John K. Wilson.
           Good taste and a desire for personal comfort
           demand that their public acts and words
           be not of such a character as to attract attention.

             See also Wedding Trip.

      AT HOME. At the end of the wedding trip they
           proceed to their own home, and immediately
           send out their At Home cards, unless they
           have followed the better plan of enclosing
           them with their wedding cards.

           They are at perfect liberty to send them to
           whom they please, and thus to select their
           friends. At these "At Homes" light refreshment
           is served, and the married couple wear full
           evening dress.

           They are generally given a dinner by the
           bridesmaids, and are entertained by both
           families in appropriate ways.

      MEN-DRESS. At a morning or afternoon wedding
           the groom, best man, and ushers wear
           afternoon dress, but at an evening wedding
           they wear evening dress.

           For further details see Best Man--Dress.
           Groom--Dress. Ushers--Dress.

      MOURNING should not be worn at a wedding, but
           should be laid aside temporarily, the wearer
           appearing in purple.

      MUSIC. The organist and the music are usually
           selected by the bride. Before the arrival of
           the bride the organist plays some bright
           selection, but on her entering the church
           and passing up the aisle he plays the Wedding March.

      PAGES. See Pages.

      PRIVATE. See Private Wedding.

      PROCESSION UP THE AISLE. Many styles are
           adopted for the procession up the aisle. A
           good order is for the ushers to come first in
           pairs, then the bridesmaids, maid of honor,
           and last the bride on her father's arm. At
           the altar the ushers and bridesmaids open
           ranks to allow the bride to pass through.

           This order is usually reversed in the procession
           down the aisle.

      RECALLING INVITATIONS. See Wedding Invitations
          (Recalled).

      RECEPTIONS. See Wedding Receptions.

      REHEARSALS. Rehearsals should be held even
           for a quiet home wedding, and at a sufficiently
           early date to insure the presence of all who
           are to participate.

      REPORTERS. See Reporters--Weddings.

      RIBBONS. See Ribbons at Church Weddings.

      RICE. See Weddings--Throwing of Rice.

      RING. This may be dispensed with, save in the
           Roman Catholic and in the Episcopal Church
           service. It is usually of plain gold, with
           initials of bride and groom and date of marriage
           engraved therein.

           It is bought by the groom, who should give
           it to the best man to be kept till it is called
           for by the clergyman during the ceremony.
           It is worn on the third finger of the bride's
           left hand.

      SECOND MARRIAGES. See Widows--Weddings.

      SIGNING THE REGISTER. This is sometimes done
           by the bride and the groom, and takes place
           in the vestry, where the best man signs as
           chief witness and some of the guests as witnesses.

      SOUVENIRS. See Souvenirs.

      THROWING OF RICE. The throwing of rice is
           to be discouraged, but if it is to be done, the
           maid of honor should prepare packages of
           rice and hand them to the guests, who throw
           it after the bridal couple as they leave the
           house for their wedding trip.

      TOASTS. Toasts to the bride and groom are customary
           at the wedding breakfast.

           If the groom gives a farewell bachelor dinner,
           he should propose a toast to the bride.

      TROUSSEAU. See Trousseau.

      USHERS. See USHERS

      WHITE RIBBONS. See RIBBONS.

      WIDOWS. See WIDOWS--WEDDINGS.

      WOMEN--DRESS. Women wear afternoon or
           evening dress, as the occasion requires.
             See also WIDOWS. GUESTS.
           WEDDINGS--GUESTS. WEDDINGS--WIDOWS.

    WHITE RIBBONS AT WEDDINGS. See RIBBONS.

    WIDOWS.
      CARD. During the first year of mourning a
           widow has no cards, as she makes no formal
           visits. After the first year, cards with border
           of any desired depth are used.

           Either the husband's name or the widow's
           baptismal name may be used, but if in the
           immediate family the husband's name is
           duplicated, she should use her own name to
           avoid confusion. When her married son has
           his father's full name, the widow should add
           SR. to hers, as the son's wife is entitled to
           the name.

      MOURNING. A widow should wear crape with a
           bonnet having a small border of white. The
           veil should be long and worn over the face
           for three months, after which a shorter veil
           may be worn for a year, and then the face
           may be exposed. Six months later white
           and lilac may be used, and colors resumed
           after two years.

      STATIONERY, MOURNING. A widow's stationery
           should be heavily bordered, and is continued
           as long as she is in deep mourning. This is
           gradually decreased, in accordance with her
           change of mourning.

           All embossing or stamping should be done
           in black.

      WEDDINGS. Widows should avoid anything distinctively
           white, even in flowers--especially
           white orange blossoms and white veil,
           these two being distinctively indicative of
           the first wedding. If she wishes, she can
           have bridesmaids and ushers. Her wedding-cards
           should show her maiden name as part of her full name.

    WIDOWERS--STATIONERY, MOURNING. The width of
           black on his stationery should be reduced as
           the interval is diminished.

           All stamping should be in black.

    WIFE--CARDS. Only the wife of the oldest member
           of the oldest branch may use her husband's
           name without the initials.

    WIFE AND HUSBAND--CARDS, VISITING. When the wife
           is calling, she can leave cards of the husband
           and sons if it is impossible for them to do so
           themselves.

           After an entertainment cards of the family
           can be left for the host and hostess by either
           the wife or any of the daughters.

    WIFE OF BARONET--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor
           to remain your Ladyship's most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, Lady Wilson, sincerely
           yours,

           The address on the envelope is: To Lady
           Wilson.

    WIFE OF A KNIGHT--HOW ADDRESSED. An official letter
           begins: Madam, and ends: I have the honor
           to remain your Ladyship's most obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, Lady Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope reads: To
           Lady Wilson.

    WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF BARON--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: Madam, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain, madam, your
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mrs. Wilson,
           and ends: Sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable Mrs. Wilson.

    WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF DUKE--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: Madam, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain, your Ladyship's
           most obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable the Lady John Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady John
           Kent, and ends: Believe me, dear Lady John
           Kent, faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lady John Kent.

    WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF EARL--HOW ADDRESSED. An
           official letter begins: Madam, and ends: I
           have the honor to remain, madam, your obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mrs. Wilson,
           and ends: Believe me, Mrs. Wilson, sincerely
           yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable Mrs. Wilson.

    WIFE Of YOUNGER SON OF MARQUIS--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: Madam, and ends:
           I have the honor to remain your Ladyship's
           most obedient servant.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Right Honorable, The Lady John Kent.

           A social letter begins: Dear Lady John Kent, and ends:
           Believe me, dear Lady John Kent, faithfully yours.

           The address is: To the Lady John Kent.

    WIFE OF YOUNGER SON OF VISCOUNT--HOW ADDRESSED.
           An official letter begins: Madam, and ends:
           I have the honour to remain, madam, your
           obedient servant.

           A social letter begins: Dear Mrs. Wilson,
           and ends: Sincerely yours.

           The address on the envelope is: To the
           Honorable Mrs. Wilson.

    WINE. A guest not caring for wine should turn
           down his glass and leave it in that position,
           or a mere sign of dissent when it is offered
           is sufficient.

    WITNESSES AT WEDDINGS. If witnesses are needed,
           the best man selects them, and himself signs
           as the chief witness.

    WOODEN WEDDINGS. Five years after the marriage
           comes the wooden wedding. On the invitations
           sent out may be engraved, if desired,
           No presents received. Congratulations may
           be extended in accepting or declining these
           invitations.

           Those invited make suitable presents, and
           on this occasion any device made of wood is
           appropriate, including articles of utility--as,
           kitchen utensils, household ornaments, etc.

           An entertainment usually follows,

    WOOLEN WEDDINGS. This is the name of the fortieth
         wedding anniversary, and is seldom celebrated.
         The invitations may have the words:
         No presents received, and in accepting or
         declining the invitations, congratulations may
         be sent.

         An entertainment should be provided, and
         any article of woolen would be appropriate
         as a gift.

    WOMEN.
      BACHELOR'S DINNERS. Women do not call upon
           a bachelor after attending a dinner given by
           him.

      CONDUCT TOWARD MEN. Male acquaintances
           should be carefully chosen, and great care
           exercised in accepting invitations from them.

           When declining invitations from a man
           personally given, explanations are not
           necessary. If they are deemed desirable, they
           should be given as delicately as possible and
           without giving offence.

           It is well never to receive men alone, unless
           they are most intimate friends. Compromising
           positions are easily fallen into, and a woman
           should be constantly on her guard.

    WOMEN SERVANTS--TIPS. It is customary for guests
           at the end of a house-party visit to give tips
           to the maid for extra attention and taking
           care of the room, and also to the cook. The
           latter is usually tipped by the married men
           and bachelors.

      AFTERNOON DRESS. See AFTERNOON DRESS--WOMEN.

      AFTERNOON TEAS. See AFTERNOON TEAS (FORMAL)
            --WOMEN. AFTERNOON TEAS (INFORMAL)--WOMEN.

      BACHELORS' DINNERS. See BACHELORS' DINNERS--WOMEN.

      BACHELORS' TEAS. See BACHELORS' TEAS--WOMEN.

      BALLS. See BALLS--WOMEN.

      BOWING. See BOWING--WOMEN.

      BREAKFASTS. See BREAKFASTS--WOMEN.

      CALLS. See CALLS--WOMEN.

      CARDS. See CARDS (VISITING)--WOMEN.

      CHAPERONE. See CHAPERONE.

      CHRISTENINGS. See CHRISTENINGS--WOMEN.

      CONCLUSION OF LETTERS. See Conclusion of a
           Letter--Women.

      COTILLIONS BY SUBSCRIPTIONS. See Cotillions
           by Subscriptions--Women.

      DANCES. See Dances--Women.

      DANCING. See Dancing--Women.

      DINNERS. See Dinners--Women.

      DRESS. See Dress--Women.

      DRIVING. See Driving--Women.

      ENGAGEMENT. See Engagement--Women.

      EVENING DRESS. See Evening Dress--Women.

      FUNERALS. See Funerals--Women.

      GARDEN PARTIES. See Garden Parties--Women.

      GLOVES. See Gloves--Women.

      HIGH TEA. See High Tea--Women.

      HOUSE PARTIES. See House Parties--Women.

      INTRODUCTIONS. See Introductions--Women.

      INVITATIONS. See Invitations--Women.

      LETTERS. See fetters-Women.

      LUNCHEONS. See Luncheons--Women.

      MORNING DRESS. See Morning Dress--Women.

      MOURNING. See Mourning--Women.

      MOURNING CARDS. See Mourning Cards--
           Women.

      NEW ACQUAINTANCE. See New Acquaintances--
           Women.

      NEWCOMERS. See Newcomers--Residents' Duty
           to Women.

      RIDING. See Riding--Women.

      SALUTATIONS. See Salutations--Women.

      SHAKING HANDS. See Shaking Hands--Women.

      STATIONERY. See Stationery--Women.

      STREET-CARS. See Street-cars--Women.

      STREET ETIQUETTE. See Street Etiquette--
           Women.

      THEATRE PARTIES. See Theatre Parties--
           Women.

           TITLES. See Titles--Women.

           TRAVELING. See Traveling--Women.

           WEDDINGS. See Weddings--Women.

    WRITTEN CARDS are in bad taste, but in case of
           necessity may be used. The name should be
           written in full if not too long, and should
           be the autograph of the sender.

    Y

    YOUNGER SON. See Son (Younger).