This Etext is for private use only. No republication for profit in print or other media may be made without the express consent of the Copyright Holder. The Copyright Holder is especially concerned about performance rights in any media on stage, cinema, or television, or audio or any other media, including readings for which an entrance fee or the like is charge. Permissions should be addressed to: Frank Morlock, 6006 Greenbelt Rd, #312, Greenbelt, MD 20770, USA or frankmorlock@msn.com. Other works by this author may be found at http://www.cadytech.com/dumas/personnage.asp?key=130
Etext by Dagny
Characters: Pinnie Hyacinth Robinson Mr. Vetch Mr. Poupin Madame Poupin Captain Sholto Millicent Henning Paul Muniment Rosy Muniment The Princess Casamassima The Prince Lady Aurora Madame Grandoni Seven women, six men.
Milly
Well, you'll have to guess my name before I tell you. Won't you
let me in? I don't want to order anything, I only came to inquire
after your 'ealth. Now, tell me, how's old Hyacinth? I should like so
much to see him.
Pinnie
Old Hyacinth?
Milly
Perhaps you call him Mr. Robinson today—you always wanted him to
hold himself so high. But to his face I'll call him the way I always
did, you wait and see.
Pinnie
Bless my soul, you must be that awful little 'Enning girl!
Milly (indignant)
Well! I'm glad you finally recognized me. I suppose I was awful.
(brightly) But, I ain't so bad now, hey? I has a call to make in these
parts, and it came into my 'ead to look you up. I don't forget old
friends.
Pinnie
You've improved as I couldn't have believed.
Milly
Well—you haven't changed. You were always calling me something
'orrid.
Pinnie
I daresay it doesn't matter to you now, does it?
Milly
Oh, I'm all right now.
Pinnie
You were a pretty child— I never said contrary to that. But I had
no idea you'd turn out like this. You're too tall for a woman.
Milly
Well, I enjoy beautiful 'ealth. Everyone thinks I'm at least
twenty- two.
Pinnie
But how did you get so splendid?
Milly
Laws! Just luck. I got work as a shop girl in a fashionable store
and now they use me as a model. We have to be beautifully dressed— I
love to look nice.
Pinnie
And how are your parents?
Milly
Gone to 'Ell, I'm afraid. They drifted off years ago, and I'm on
my own.
Pinnie (suspiciously)
You haven't come here to see me.
Milly
I'm glad to see you. I told you I came to ask after my sweetheart.
Wot's become of him?
Pinnie
He's an apprentice bookbinder.
Milly
In bookbinding? Laws! Do you mean he works? Well, I always knew he
would have something to do with books. But, I didn't think he would
ever follow a trade.
Pinnie
A trade? Mr. Robinson considers it one of the fine arts.
Milly
Very likely it's good work. Better than this, no doubt.
Pinnie (crossly)
I haven't so much work as I used to have, if that's what you mean.
My eyes aren't so good and neither is my health these days.
Milly
You need some new ideas about fashion. You need someone to help
you. I can see you're using the same old styles as ever.
Pinnie
I've had helpers in the past. None of them turned out any good.
Milly
Maybe I can get you some business—you always did excellent
sewing— but, you ain't got no sense of fashion. I'll bring the
patterns.
Pinnie (some sense of Pinnie's poverty can be gained from
the fact that she would like to reject such help out of hand but
swallows her pride and says quietly)
That would be very kind.
Milly
Mind you give my love to Hyacinth. I don't care if you know that
the only reason I stopped was in hope of seeing him again. There's no
shame in wanting to see my childhood sweetheart. Do give him my best
love, and tell him I hope he'll come and see me. I can see you won't
tell him anything. What are you afraid of? I won't hurt your precious
Hyacinth. I'll leave my card for him all the same. (extracting a
visiting card from her purse)
Pinnie (amazed at the little Henning girl's social standing
without being in any way delighted by it)
My word!
Millie What do you think I want to do with him? I could swallow him in one bite.
Pinnie
You needn't think I shall put myself out to keep him in the dark.
I shall certainly tell him you've been here, and exactly how you
strike me.
Milly
Of course, you'll say something nasty like you used to when I was
a child. You used to let me 'ave it then, you know.
Pinnie
Ah, well, you're very different now, when I think what you've come
from.
Milly
What I've come from? Just because you're stuck in this slum, don't
expect me to stay 'ere! You've had to stay in it yourself, so you
might speak civilly of it! And pray, what have you come from yourself,
and what has he come from? The mysterious Mr. Hyacinth Robinson, whose
father was 'Lord Fredrick and whose mother was—
Pinnie (jumping up)
I've nothing to tell you. Leave my shop!
(Hyacinth Robinson, a finely built, young man of about twenty
enters unseen by Pinnie, but visible to Millicent.)
Milly
Gracious, Hyacinth Robinson—is that you?
(Pinnie turns around, then immediately, crestfallen, goes to her
sewing desk.)
Hyacinth
Were you talking about me just now?
Milly
When I asked where you 'ad come from? (innocently) That was
because we heard you in the 'all. I suppose you've come from your
work.
Hyacinth
You used to live in the Place—you were the girl that always
wanted to kiss me. Didn't she live in Lomax Place, Pinnie?
Milly
Do you know what you look like—you look for all the world like a
plastered up Frenchman! Don't he look like a funny little Frenchie,
Mrs. Pysnet?
Hyacinth
Have you come back to live in the Place?
Milly
Heaven forbid, that I should ever do that! I must live near the
establishment in which I am employed.
Hyacinth
And what establishment is that now? Is it the Cock and Bull, or
the Elephant and Castle?
Milly
A pub? Well, you haven't got the manners of a Frenchie.
Pinnie (under her breath)
Whorehouse more likely!
Milly
I don't care what a man looks like so long as he knows a lot.
That's the look I like.
Pinnie
Miss 'Enning wouldn't live in Lomax Place for the world. She
thinks it too low.
Hyacinth
So it is, it's a beastly hole.
Milly
Right you are!
Hyacinth
Don't you think I know something?
Milly
You? Oh, I don't care a straw what you know!
Pinnie
I think you had better shut the door.
Hyacinth
Did you come here on purpose to see us?
Milly
I thought I'd just give it a look. I had an engagement not far
off. But I wouldn't have believed anyone who said I'd find you just
where I left you.
Pinnie (sourly)
We needed you to look after us!
Hyacinth
Oh, you're such a success.
Milly
None of your rattling impudence. I'm as good a girl as there is in
London. If you were to offer to see me home, I'd tell you I don't
knock about that way with gentlemen.
Hyacinth
I'll go with you as far as you like.
Milly
Well—all right—but it's only because I knew you as a baby.
Hyacinth
Pinnie, let's have some tea.
(Pinnie, mortified, obeys and goes out to get the tea.)
Milly
What a way to treat your mother. Oh—I forgot she ain't your
mother. How stupid I am! I keep forgetting.
Hyacinth
My mother died many years ago; she was an invalid. But Pinnie has
been very good to me.
Milly
My mother's dead, too. She died very suddenly. I daresay you
remember her in the Place. But I've had no Pinnie.
Hyacinth
You look as if you can take care of yourself.
Milly
Well, I'm very healthy. What became of Mr. Vetch? We used to say
that if Miss Pysnet was your mama, Mr. Vetch was your papa. We used to
call him Miss Pysnet's young man.
Hyacinth
He's her young man still. He's our best friend. He lives by his
fiddle—as he used to. In fact, he got me the place I'm now in.
Milly
I should have thought he would get you a place at his theatre.
Hyacinth
At his theatre? But, I'd be no use in the theatre. I don't play
any instrument.
Milly
I don't mean in the orchestra, you baby. You'd look ver nice in a
fancy costume. Is Miss Pysnet some relation? What gave her any rights
over you?
Hyacinth (uneasily)
Miss Pysnet's an old friend of the family. My mother was very fond
of her and she was fond of my mother. Mr. Vetch has changed his
lodgings: he moved out of Seventeen three years ago. He couldn't stand
the other people in the house. There was a man who played the
accordion.
Milly (reproachfully)
He might have put you into something better than a bookbinder's.
Hyacinth
He wasn't obliged to put me into anything. After all, he's not
even a relation of Pinnie's. And he has trouble enough supporting
himself. I think he never married Pinnie—assuming he could persuade
her—because he has no money.
(Pinnie returns with the teapot and servings. After placing
everything on the table, she stalks out.)
Milly
Friendly, ain't she?
Hyacinth
She's very protective of me. She's always afraid I'll marry
beneath me.
Milly
All the same, I didn't expect to find you in a bookbinder's.
Hyacinth
Where would you have looked to find me? Pity you couldn't have
told me in advance, I'd have endeavoured to meet your expectations.
Milly
Do you know what they used to say in the Place? They say your
father was a Lord. A real English Lord.
Hyacinth
Very likely. That's the kind of gossip they spread in that
precious hole.
Milly
Well, perhaps he was.
Hyacinth
He might have been Prime Minister for all the good it has done me.
Milly
Fancy, your talking as if you didn't know!
Hyacinth (politely, but savagely)
Finish your tea. Don't mind how I talk.
Milly
Well, you 'ave got a temper. I should've thought you'd be a clerk
to a lawyer, or at a bank.
Hyacinth
Do they select them for their tempers?
Milly
You know what I mean. You used to be so clever. I never thought
you'd follow a trade.
Hyacinth
I'm not clever enough to live on air.
Milly
You might be, really, for all the tea you drink! Why didn't you go
in for some profession?
Hyacinth (bitterly)
How was I to go in? Who the devil was to help me?
Milly
Haven't you got an connection?
Hyacinth
Are you trying to trick me into boasting of my aristocratic
connections? Sorry, I don't have any.
Milly
Well, I'm sorry you're only a journeyman.
Hyacinth
So am I! But the art of bookbinding is an exquisite art, I'll say
that. Even if it doesn't pay well.
Milly
So Pinnie told me! Have you got some samples? I'd like to look at
some.
Hyacinth (condescendingly)
You wouldn't know how good they are.
Milly (irritated)
That's just the way you used to talk to me years ago in the Place.
Hyacinth
I don't care about that. I hate all that time.
Milly
If you come to that, so do I! You always used to have your nose in
a book. I never thought you'd work with your hands.
Hyacinth
Depend upon it, I won't do it an hour longer than I have to.
Milly
What will you do then?
Hyacinth
You'll see someday. I had to do something. I couldn't go on living
off Pinnie. I took what I could get. Thank God I help her a little
now.
Milly
You talk like a reg'lar gentleman.
Hyacinth
I'm not. I'm just an obscure little beggar born of a French woman
to a supposed English Lord—living in a squalid little corner of
London. And so, I'm a bookbinder.
Milly
I didn't think I could ever fancy anyone in that line.
Hyacinth
Allow me to see you out.
Milly
I should be delighted. (aside) A reg'lar gentleman.
(Exit Milly and Hyacinth out the street door. After a moment, enter
Mr. Vetch with Poupin, Madame Poupin, and Paul Muniment.)
Vetch
Pinnie was good enough to let us meet here.
(They close the shutters. Poupin coughs terribly, and is helped by
his wife.)
Vetch
Are you all right, my dear Poupin?
Poupin
I'm suffering extremely, but we must all suffer so long as the
social question is so abominably, iniquitously neglected.
Madame
Ah yes, the politicians never think of the poor. There are times
when I ask myself ho long it will go on.
Poupin (passionately)
It will go on till the measure of their infamy is full. Till the
day of justice! Till the day the disinherited shake the globe!
Madame
Oh, we always see things continue; we never see them change.
Poupin
We may not see it, but They will see it.
Paul
What do you mean, shake the globe?
Poupin
I mean that force will make the bourgeoisie go down to their
cellars and hide—behind their barrels of wine and their heaps of
gold.
(Hyacinth quietly reenters; he is expected and the discussion
continues without interruption. Someone says "You're late.")
Madame
And, in this country, I hope in their coal bins. La, la, we shall
find them even there.
Poupin
Eighty-nine was an irresistible force.
Paul
Yes, I know, I know you fought them. But everything is yet to be
tried.
Poupin
Oh, the trial will be on a grand scale. Soyez tranquille.
Madame (indicating Hyacinth and Paul)
You ought to present these gentlemen.
Poupin
Monsieur Hyacinth is a gifted child—a child in whom I take a
tender interest—a child who has an account to settle. Oh, a thumping
big one! Isn't that so, mon petit?
Hyacinth
Oh, I only want them to leave me alone.
Poupin
He's very young.
Madame
He's the person we have seen in this country that we like the
best.
Paul
Perhaps he's French.
Hyacinth
Oh, I'm nothing.
Madame
Do you mean to say you're not as good as anyone else in this
world? I should like to see—!
Paul
We all have an account to settle, don't you know?
Madame
It is a shame not to take Monsieur Hyacinth in.
Poupin
All in good time, all in good time. Monsieur Hyacinth knows that I
count on him, whether I make him an intern today or tomorrow.
Hyacinth
What do you mean "intern"?
Poupin
Do not trifle with state secrets. You are too young.
Madame
One is never too young to do one's bit.
Paul
Can you keep a secret?
Hyacinth
Is it a plot? A conspiracy?
Poupin
He asks as if he were asking for plum pudding. It's terribly
serious, my child.
Paul
It's a group of workers to which he (indicating Poupin) and I, and
a good many others belong. (Poupin scowls) There's no harm in telling
him that.
Madame
I advise you not to tell it to Miz Pinnie; she's quite in the old
ideas.
Vetch
I quite agree. Pinnie thinks we are merely having a social
gathering.
Hyacinth
If you've got some plan, something to which one can give one's
self,— I think you might tell me.
Poupin
It's an accident you haven't met Paul here before.
Madame
How could they have met, when Mr. Paul never comes? He doesn't
spoil us!
Paul (seriously)
Well, you see, I have my little sister at home to take care of.
This afternoon, luckily, a lady came to sit with her.
Madame
A lady—a real lady?
Paul
Oh yes, every inch a lady.
Madame
Why do you permit them to thrust themselves in on you, simply
because you have the misfortune to be poor? It seems to be the custom
in this country—but it wouldn't suit me, or any other person from
France at all. I should like to see one of ces dames, one of the real
ones, coming to sit with me.
Paul
Oh, you're not a cripple. You've got the use of your legs, whereas
Rosy—
Madame
Yes, and my tongue!
Paul
This lady looks after several others in our tenement—and reads to
my sister.
Madame
It would enrage me! You are too patient, you English.
Paul
We need patience. We shall never do anything without that.
Poupin
You're perfectly right about that. You cannot say it too often. It
will be a tremendous job. Only the strong will prevail.
Paul (to Hyacinth)
Madame says we ought to know each other—
Hyacinth
Will you tell me all about your plot?
Paul (warily)
It's not a plot. I don't care much for plots. It's just taking a
stand on two or three points.
Poupin
A stand, that's what we must make—a stand! (he begins coughing
terribly)
Madame
Between us, we've thrown him into a fever. We'd better go.
Paul (to Hyacinth as the Poupins prepare to leave with Vetch)
My mane is Paul Muniment.
Hyacinth
And what's your trade?
Paul
I work for a firm of wholesale chemists at Lambeth.
Hyacinth
And where do you live?
Paul
On the far side of London. The south actually.
Hyacinth
Are you going home now?
Paul
Yes, I'm going to toddle.
Hyacinth
And may I toddle with you?
Paul
If you like, but you won't learn about any plots. Still coming?
Hyacinth
Yes.
Paul
Come along. You can meet my sister,—her name's Rosy. You've never
met anyone like her.
BLACKOUT
Paul (from outside)
Hallo, have you gone to roost?
Rosy
Oh dear, no: we're sitting in the dark. Lady Aurora's so kind.
She's still here.
(Lady Aurora lights a lamp. Rosy is revealed in bed.)
Paul (entering with Hyacinth)
Well now, that's beautiful. You'll have a party then, for I've
brought someone else. We're poor, you know, but honest, and not afraid
of showing up. We can manage a candle.
Aurora
Oh, I brought some candles; we could have a light if you wished.
Paul
Rosy, girl, I've brought you a visitor. This young man has walked
all the way from Lisson Grove to make your acquaintance. (to Hyacinth)
You mustn't mind her being in bed—she's always in bed. Just the way a
slippery little trout's in the water.
Rosy
Dear me, if I didn't receive company because I was in bed, there
wouldn't be much use, would there, Lady Aurora?
Aurora
Oh, mercy, no; it seems quite the natural place! And it's such a
lovely bed, such a comfortable bed.
Rosy
Indeed it is, when your Ladyship makes it up.
Paul (to Lady Aurora)
You haven't been dong that again?
Aurora
Who would if I didn't? It only takes a minute if someone knows
how.
Paul
I can do it well enough.
Aurora
Oh, I've no doubt whatever.
Paul
This is Mr. Hyacinth Robinson. That won't tell you much, but
you'll like him; he's all right. I was introduced by the Poupins.
Rosy
Your name, like mine, represents a flower. Mine is Rose Muniment,
and her Ladyship is Aurora Lanhish. That means the morning or the
dawn; it's the most beautiful of all, don't you think? Isn't it right
she should be called dawn when she brings light wherever she goes? The
Poupins are the charming foreigners I've told you about. (this last to
Lady Aurora)
Aurora
Oh, it's so pleasant knowing a few foreigners. They're often so
fresh.
Paul
Mr. Robinson's a sort of foreigner—and he's definitely fresh.
Speaks French very well.
Aurora
Oh, there are so many good books in French.
Hyacinth
Rather a torment when you have no way of getting at them.
Aurora
Well, I have a good deal of my own, and I should be glad to give
you some.
Hyacinth, Well, thank you very much.
Rosy
Isn't that just like her ladyship—wanting to make up to people
for being less lucky than herself. She'd take the shoes off her feet
for anyone that might take a fancy to them.
Aurora
I'll stop coming to see you, if you're going to take me up like
this for everything. It's the least I can do—to give what I have.
Rosy
Lady Aurora is ashamed of being rich. She's a tremendous
socialist. Worse even than Paul.
Hyacinth
I wonder if she's worse than me?
Paul
Hullo, I didn't know you were so advanced. Have we been
entertaining an angel unawares?
Hyacinth
You didn't know I was so advanced? Why, I thought that was the
principal thing about me.
Paul
I thought the principal thing about you was that you knew French.
Aurora
I should like so very much to know—it would be interesting—how
far exactly you do go?
Hyacinth
I think I go about as far as anybody. I think I see my way to
conclusions from which even the Poupins would shrink. Poupin, at any
rate—I'm not so sure about his wife.
Aurora
I should like so much to know her.
Paul
The principal conclusion Mr. Robinson sees his way to is that your
father ought to have his head chopped off and carried on a pike.
Aurora
Ah, yes. The French Revolution.
Hyacinth
I don't know anything about your father.
Rosy
Didn't you ever hear of Lord Inglefield?
Aurora
He's one of the best.
Paul
Very likely, but he's a landlord with a park of five thousand
acres all to himself, while we're bundled together in a sort of
kennel.
Rosy
I've told you often enough that I don't go along with you at all.
Paul
Everything points to great changes in the country, but if once our
Rosy's against them—how can we be sure?
Rosy
Her Ladyship may think I'm as good as her—but she can't make me
believe it.
Aurora
I think you're much better than I—and I know very few people as
good as you. Apropos of revolution—if there were to be
a—disturbance—I believe the upper classes would behave quite
differently. I don't think they'd all go abroad.
Hyacinth
Go abroad?
Aurora
I mean they'd stay and resist. They'd fight very hard.
Rosy
I'm sure they'd win, too.
Aurora
They'd struggle until they were beaten.
Hyacinth
And you think they'd be beaten in the end?
Aurora
Oh, yes. But I hope it won't come to that.
Paul
I infer you all talk it over amongst yourselves—to settle the
line you'll take.
Rosy
But I detect something in her tone which I think is a great
mistake. If her Ladyship thinks to be let off easily for the
concession she's made in advance—she can save herself the trouble.
The people won't be bit wiser. They won't know or care. So don't waste
your time or good nature. When you're up so high as that you've got to
stay there. The best thing you can do is hold up your head! I can
promise your Ladyship I would.
Paul
Rosy's right, my Lady. It's no use trying to buy yourself off. You
can't do enough. Eat your pudding while you have it—you may not have
it long.
Aurora
You're the most delightful people. I wish everyone could know you.
But I must really be going.
Rosy
Paul will see you as far as you like.
Aurora
Well, you may see me down stairs.
Rosy
You must call a cab.
Aurora
Oh, I don't go in cabs. I walk.
Paul
Well, you may go on top of a bus if you like. You can't help being
superb.
Aurora
Superb? Oh, mercy!
Paul (following Lady Aurora out)
Wait for me a little.
(Exit Aurora, followed by Paul.)
Rosy (to Hyacinth)
She lives in Belgrave Square; she had ever so many brothers and
sisters; one of her sisters is married to Lord Warmington— She's
dedicated her life to the poor. And she's so natural. She's not the
least it condescending.
Hyacinth
No, she's not. (pause) You and your brother strike me as being
very curious people.
Rosy
Really! If you had known my father and mother—
Hyacinth
Were they curious, too?
Rosy
Rather. They came from the mines. My father was working in a pit
when he was a child of ten. He never had a day's schooling in his
life, but he invented a machine. My father was as black as the coal he
worked. But he was intelligent, my mother, too. But, what's the use of
brains if you haven't got a backbone? He invented a new kind of beam
fixing device—whatever that is. And he sold it for fifteen pounds. No
royalties! Nothing. He used to get drunk. He fell into a gravel pit.
That's the reason my brother won't touch a drop. My mother kept us
decent somehow. She was terribly handsome. And it was from her we got
our education. She did it somehow. Then she was taken by typhoid. Our
parents had good brains to give us.
Hyacinth
Are you very fond of your brother?
Rosy
If you ever quarrel with him, you'll see whose side I shall take.
Hyacinth
Before that, I'll take care to make you like me.
Rosy
I already do. But, see how fast I'll fling you over.
Hyacinth
Then, why are you so opposed to his ideas?
Rosy
He'll get over them.
Hyacinth
Never! I've only known him for a day—but I can tell!
Rosy
Is that the way you're going to make me like you—by contradicting
me so?
Hyacinth
You don't believe in human equality?
Rosy
I haven't the least objection to seeing the people improved—but I
don't want to see the aristocracy lowered even an inch.
Hyacinth
Positively feudal. You ought to know my aunt Pinnie. She's another
idolater of the aristocracy.
Rosy
Oh, you're making me like you very fast! And pray, who's your aunt
Pinnie?
Hyacinth
She's a dressmaker. I'll bring her someday. Don't you want a
better place to live in?
Rosy
A better place than this? How could there be a better place than
this? If you think I'm not perfectly content, you're very much
mistaken.
Hyacinth
Don't you sometimes make your brother very cross?
Rosy
Cross? Never with me.
Hyacinth
Isn't he deep in——
Rosy
Deep in what?
Hyacinth
Doesn't he belong to important things?
Rosy
You must ask him. I don't know.
(Paul reenters.)
Rosy (to Paul)
You must have crossed the Channel with her Ladyship. I wonder
which of you enjoyed the walk most?
Paul
She's a handy old girl, and has a goodish stride.
Rosy
I think she's in love with you.
Paul
Really, my dear, for an admirer of the aristocracy, you allow
yourself a license.
Hyacinth
Perhaps she is—why not?
Paul
She's daft enough for anything.
Hyacinth
But, is she only playing, or is she in earnest?
Paul (changing the subject)
How are you two getting on?
Rosy (ironically)
Oh, he's made himself most agreeable.
Hyacinth
She won't tell me about your revolutionary clubs.
Paul
You mustn't ask her that sort of thing.
Hyacinth
What can I do if you won't tell me anything definite yourself?
Rosy
It will be definite enough when you get hanged for it.
Paul
Why do you want to poke your head into ugly black holes?
Hyacinth
Don't you belong to the party of action?
Paul
Where did you pick up that catchword? In the newspapers? Is that
the party you want to belong to?
Hyacinth
Yes. Show me the thing.
Paul
What thing do you mean, infatuated, deluded youth?
Rosy
Well, you do go places you had far better keep out of. I wonder,
sometimes, when they are going to make a search for your papers.
Paul
The day they find my papers, my dear, will be the day you get up
and dance.
Hyacinth
What did you ask me to come here for?
Paul
To see if you'd be afraid.
Hyacinth
Try me.
Rosy
I'm sure if you introduce him to some of your low, wicked friends,
he'll be delighted.
Hyacinth
Just the sort I want to know.
Paul
Meet me sometime.
Hyacinth
Where?
Paul
Oh, I'll tell you when we get away from her.
BLACKOUT
Pinnie
There's only one thing I want to know. Does she expect you to
marry her, dearest?
Hyacinth
Does who expect me?
Pinnie
Of course you know who I mean. The one that came after you from
the other end of London—and picked you right up. Aren't there plenty
of low fellows in that vulgar part where she lives—without her
ravaging over here? Why can't she stick to her own beat, I should like
to know? Just promise me this, my precious child—if you get into any
sort of mess with that piece, you'll immediately confide it to your
poor old Pinnie.
Hyacinth
My poor old Pinnie sometimes makes my quite sick. What sort of
mess do you expect me to get into?
Pinnie
Suppose she pretends you promised to marry her?
Hyacinth
You don't know what you're talking about. She doesn't want to
marry anyone.
Pinnie (unconvinced)
Then, what does she want?
Hyacinth
Oh, my protection.
Pinnie
Protection! Stuff. And pray, who's to protect you?
Hyacinth
In any event, it isn't from Milly that any harm will come to me.
Pinnie
I can't think why you like her.
Hyacinth
You're a good person and yet you're ready——
Pinnie
Well, what am I ready to do? I'm not ready to see you gobbled up
before my eyes.
Hyacinth
You needn't be afraid of her dragging me to the altar.
Pinnie
Doesn't she think you're good enough for a 'Enning?
Hyacinth
You just don't understand. One of these days, she'll marry a very
rich, very respectable alderman.
Pinnie
That creature?
Hyacinth
Or a banker, or a bishop. She doesn't want to end her career—she
wants to begin it.
Pinnie
Well, I wish she'd leave you alone.
Hyacinth
What are you afraid of? Look, we'd better clear this up, once and
for all. Are you afraid of my marrying a shop girl?
Pinnie (horrified)
Oh, you wouldn't, would you?
Hyacinth
The kind of girl who'd look at me is the kind of girl I'd never
look at.
Pinnie
I'm sure a Princess might look at you, and be none the worse.
Hyacinth
Well, it's always nice to have your support.
Pinnie
You must be aware how lacking she is. Doesn't she bore you?
Hyacinth
She does—to extinction.
Pinnie
Then why do you spend every evening with her?
Hyacinth
What else should I do? Go to a gin palace?
Pinnie
Oh well, if you see her as she is, I don't care what you do, but
try not to get her pregnant!
(Hyacinth is stunned. Enter Mr. Vetch.)
Vetch
Hallo, Pinnie.
Pinnie
Oh, Mr. Vetch, please talk some sense into him. I cannot.
(Exit Pinnie.)
Hyacinth
I haven't seen you in a long time.
Vetch
What's bothering Pinnie?
Hyacinth
I want to take a young lady to the theatre.
Vetch
I'm afraid you'll find your young lady expensive.
Hyacinth
I find everything expensive.
Vetch
Especially, I suppose, your secret societies?
Hyacinth
What do you mean by that?
Vetch
Why, you told me a while back you were about to join a few.
Hyacinth
A few? How many do you suppose? Do you think if I'd been serious,
I'd tell?
Vetch
Oh dear, oh dear. (as to Milly) You want to take her to my place,
I suppose?
Hyacinth
She won't go there. She wants to see something in the Strand. The
Pear of Paraguay. I don't wish to pay anything if I can avoid it. I'm
sorry to say I haven't a penny. But it occurred to me you might be
able to get me a seat as a favor.
Vetch
Do you want a box?
Hyacinth
Something more modest.
Vetch
Why not a box?
Hyacinth
Because I haven't the clothes people wear in that sort of place.
Vetch
Your young lady has the clothes?
Hyacinth
She has everything.
Vetch
Where does she get 'em?
Hyacinth
Oh, she's a model in a high fashion shop.
Vetch (pulling out some tobacco)
Won't you have a pipe? What will she do with you?
Hyacinth
What do you mean?
Vetch
Your big amazon—Miss Henning. I know all about her from Pinnie.
Hyacinth
Then, you know my terrible fate.
Vetch
But it doesn't matter much.
Hyacinth
I don't know what you're talking about.
Vetch
Well now—the other thing. You're very deep into that.
Hyacinth
Did Pinnie tell you all about that?
Vetch
No, our friend Poupin had told me a good deal. Besides, I see it.
Hyacinth
How do you see it, pray?
Vetch
Anyone can tell to look at you, you've taken a blood oath to some
cutthroat crew.
Hyacinth
You won't get me the tickets, then?
Vetch
My dear boy, I offer you a box.
Hyacinth
It has nothing to do with—
Vetch
Is it a more deadly secret?
Hyacinth
I thought you pretended to be a radical?
Vetch
Well—so I do—of the old fashioned constitutional sort. I'm not
an exterminator.
Hyacinth
We don't know what we may be when the time comes.
Vetch
Is the time coming, then, my dear young friend?
Hyacinth
I don't think I can give you any more of a warning than that.
Vetch
It's very kind of you to do so much, I'm sure. Meanwhile, in the
little time that is left, you wish to crowd in all possible enjoyment
with the young ladies—a very natural inclination. Do you see many
foreigners?
Hyacinth
Yes. A good many.
Vetch
And what do you think of them?
Hyacinth
I rather like the English best.
Vetch
Paul Muniment, for example?
Hyacinth
What do you know about him?
Vetch
I see him at the Poupins. I know you and he are thick as thieves.
Hyacinth
He'll distinguish himself very much someday.
Vetch
Very likely, very likely. And what will he do with you?
Hyacinth
Try to get me two good places in the second balcony.
Vetch (uneasily)
You had better put in all the fun you can, you know.
BLACKOUT
Milly
Who is that man watching you?
Hyacinth
Watching me? You more likely.
Milly
Of course, he's noticed me. But you're the one he wants to get
hold of.
Hyacinth
To get hold of?
Milly
Yes, you ninny, don't hang back. He may make your fortune.
Hyacinth
Well, if you'd like to meet him, I'll go and take a walk in the
Strand.
Milly (after Sholto has smiled at Hyacinth) Now, do you say it's only me he's after?
Hyacinth
I'm only the pretext.
Milly
Well, if he knows us, he might give us some sign—and if he
doesn't, he might leave us alone. Is he one of your grand relations?
Well, I can stare as well as him. Is he one of those Lords your aunt
Pinnie was talking about at the Place? No, he's too young to be your
grandfather.
Hyacinth
I have no idea whether he was one of that lot.
Milly
You might at least tell me his name, so that I shall know what to
call him if he comes round to speak to us.
Hyacinth
He won't do that.
Milly
He couldn't grin more if he was your own brother. He may want to
make my acquaintance—after all, he wouldn't be the first.
Hyacinth
I don't know that I'm at liberty to disclose his name. I met him
at a place he may not like to have it known he goes.
Milly
Do you go to places that people are ashamed of? One of your filthy
political clubs, no doubt. My Lord! He is coming——
Sholto (coming over, beaming at Hyacinth)
My dear fellow, I really had to come round to speak to you. The
trouble is I'm with a pair of ladies, and one of them has a great
desire to make your acquaintance.
Hyacinth
To make my acquaintance?
Milly
Is that so?
Sholto
She has a tremendous desire to meet someone who looks at the whole
business from your standpoint, don't you see? And in her position she
scarcely has a chance. She's really the most remarkable woman in
Europe.
Milly
That's all very well, but who's to look after me?
Sholto
My dear young lady, can you think I've been unmindful of that?
Milly (somewhat shocked)
I'm much obliged to you! Mr. Robinson, is it your intention to
leave me? Who is the lady?
Sholto
The Princess Casamassima.
Milly
Laws! And what's she want with him?
Sholto
To discuss the lower orders.
Milly (infuriated)
And does she think we belong to them? (to Hyacinth) I don't care
if you go. I should like to know about this Princess.
Sholto
Oh, I'll tell you all about her.
(Sholto escorts them off. After a slight pause, followed by a
slight dimming of the lights. Hyacinth returns with the Princess
Casamassima and Madame Grandoni, a very old lady of impeccable
manners.)
Princess
I like to know all sorts of people.
Hyacinth
I shouldn't think you'd have any difficulty in that.
Princess
Everyone isn't so obliging as you.
Grandoni
She makes everyone do everything.
Princess
Her name is Madame Grandoni.
Grandoni
But I'm not Italian—any more than she is. She's an American, I'm
actually a German. Nobody with an Italian name is Italian these days.
That is a very charming person you were with.
Princess
Yes, she's very charming. We take a great interest in the things
you care for. We take a great interest in the people.
Grandoni
Speak for yourself. I take none. I don't understand the people and
I know nothing about them. I always respect decent people of any
class, but I don't pretend any passion for the ignorant
masses—because I don't have such a passion.
Princess
She lives with me; she's everything to me. She's the best woman in
the world. But she has a disturbing habit of speaking her mind. What
do you think of Captain Sholto?
Hyacinth
I hardly know him.
Princess
Isn't he a very curious type?
Hyacinth
Possibly. I can't make him out.
Princess
Neither can I. He's what they call a cosmopolitan. He told me he's
had some interesting talks with you about the social question. That's
why I asked him to introduce me.
Hyacinth
He managed to slip off with Milly very neatly.
Princess
Do you ever admit women?
Hyacinth
I'm afraid I don't understand?
Princess
Into your meetings. I should like so much to be present. Why not?
Hyacinth
I haven't seen any ladies.— You know I'm not sure he should go
about reporting our meetings.
Princess
I see. Perhaps you think he's a police spy or agent provocateur?
Hyacinth
No. Spies are more discreet. But, after all, he's heard very
little.
Princess
You mean he hasn't really been behind the scenes? But you needn't
have the least fear of Captain Sholto. He's incapable of betraying
anyone. Actually, he's gone into this sort of thing merely to please
me. You see, for a woman it's so difficult. So, I commissioned the
Captain, ha, ha. What I wanted him to do was to make friends with the
leading spirit.
Hyacinth
Surely, Captain Sholto doesn't take me for a leading spirit?
Princess
He said you were very original.
Hyacinth (laughing ironically)
I'm one of thousands in my class—there's nothing original about
me at all. I am a mere particle in the grey immensity of the people.
Princess
Much more than that, I think.
Hyacinth
I have a friend who's remarkable.
Princess
Who's your friend?
Grandoni
Ah, Christina, Christina!
Hyacinth
A young man who lives in Camberwell.
Princess
Can you bring him to see me?
Hyacinth
I don't know if he would come. He might think you a little too
avid for his company.
Princess
That makes me want to see him all the more. But you'll come
yourself?
Hyacinth
You want me to come and see you? An unexpected honor.
Grandoni
Go and see her—go and see her once or twice. She'll treat you
like an angel.
Princess
You must think I'm very strange.
Hyacinth
Oh, no. I know another lady who does this sort of thing.
Princess
I wish I could make you trust me— I see you don't. You'd find I
go pretty far—
Grandoni
She goes too far.
Princess
I'm not just some rich bitch amusing myself. I'm concerned—I'm
convinced people of my class are living in a fool's paradise.
Grandoni
She wants to be part of the revolution—to guide it, to enlighten
it.
Hyacinth
I'm sure she could manage it perfectly.
Princess
I've no such pretensions. Please don't laugh at me. What can be
more absurd than for a woman with a title and great wealth to throw in
her lot with the masses? You've a right to demand that I give all that
up.
Hyacinth
—But—
Princess
That I give all that up before you believe me. Well, I'm ready!
That's the least difficulty. I'm here to learn, not to teach.
Hyacinth
I'm not asking you to give anything up. Why give it up? It might
come in handy.
Princess
What's your occupation?
Hyacinth
I'm a bookbinder.
Princess
And your mysterious friend?
Hyacinth
A chemist
Princess (as if seeing visions of a bomb maker)
Ah! And what do you call home?
Hyacinth
Lomax Place in the north of London.
Princess
No—I don't think I've heard of it.
Hyacinth
It isn't much. I live with a dressmaker.
Princess
Do you mean——?
Grandoni
Is she your wife?
Hyacinth
No, no. She brought me up.
Princess
And your family?
Hyacinth
I have no family.
Princess
None at all?
Hyacinth (emphatically)
None at all!
Princess (seeing his annoyance)
Perhaps that's best.— Do you think anything will occur soon?
Hyacinth
Pardon?
Princess
That there'll be a great crisis— That you'll make yourselves
felt?
Grandoni
Please don't do anything for another hour or two. I want to enjoy
the play.
Princess
You cannot answer, of course. But remember what I just said. I'll
give up everything—everything.
(Sholto returns with Milly. The conversation continues for a few
minutes in mime.)
Sholto
My dear fellow, you were born under a lucky star.
Hyacinth
I never suspected it!
Sholto
Why, what in the world to you want? You have the faculty, the
precious faculty to inspire women with an interest—but an interest!
Don't be afraid, you'll go far.
(The conversation lapses back into mime. Sholto leads off the
Princess and Grandoni.)
Milly
She's a tidy lot, your Princess, by what I can learn.
Hyacinth
What do you know about her?
Milly
What that fellow told me.
Hyacinth
And, what was that?
Milly
Well, she's a bad 'un as ever was. Her own husband had to turn her
out of the house.
Hyacinth
I could care less about that.
Milly
Don't you? Well, in that case, I do!
BLACKOUT
Hyacinth
She wants to see you; she asked me to bring you. She was very
serious.
Paul
To bring me—bring me where? You talk as if I were a sample from
your shop or a little dog you had for sale.
Hyacinth
Well, you're a friend of mine. That's enough for her.
Paul
You mean, I suppose, that it ought to be enough for me that she's
a friend of yours?
Hyacinth
Certainly. I vouch for her.
Paul
Are you sure she isn't making game of you?
Hyacinth
I don't think so. What good would it do her?
Paul
That, I don't know. But she's one of them—and they're capable of
anything.
Hyacinth
Be realistic. They're not all evil. People can't help it because
they're born rich.
Paul
Undoubtedly, she's an idle, perhaps a profligate female.
Hyacinth
If you'd seen her, you wouldn't talk that way.
Paul
God forbid, I should see her then, if she's so charming. I don't
need to be corrupted.
Hyacinth
And you think I'm in danger?
Paul (good-naturedly)
No—you're immune. You're already such a little mass of
corruption.
Hyacinth
Leave off fooling. There are unselfish people—
Paul
I'm not in the least surprised that the aristocracy is curious to
know what we're up to, and wants very much to look into it.
Hyacinth
Are you afraid I'll blab secrets to her?
Paul
What secrets could you tell her, my pretty lad?
Hyacinth (upset)
You don't trust me—you never have.
Paul
We will someday. Don't be afraid. And when we do, you'll be very
disappointed.— Now tell me about this fellow Sholto—I haven't
actually met him, though I've seen him at one of our meetings.
Hyacinth
Captain Sholto isn't the same sort as the Princess. Quite
different.
Paul
Different, of course. She's a handsome woman, and he's an ugly
man. But, neither of them will save us or spoil us. Their curiosity is
natural, but I've other things to do than to show them around,—or to
be shown around by them. You can tell her Serene Highness that I'm
much obliged.
Hyacinth
You show Lady Aurora around—what's the difference? If it's right
for her to take an interest, why isn't it right for the Princess?
Paul
All I know of Lady Aurora is that she comes to sit with my sister.
If the Princess will do as much, I'll see what I can do. But apart
from that, I shall never take a grain of interest in her feelings for
the masses.
Hyacinth
Do you think she can hurt me?
Paul
Yes, very likely. But you must hit her back, and really give it to
her. That's your line, you know. I'm an ugly brute, but you're one of
those taking little beggars that the women like.— Only, you know, if
she really hurt you, she'd have to deal with me.
Hyacinth
That's very kind of you to say, Paul.
Paul
We are friends, you know, for whatever that's worth. (going
upstairs) Now, I've got to get Rosy ready before Lady Aurora comes or
she'll be doing everything for her, and Rosy won't have that.
(Exit Paul. After a moment, enter Lady Aurora from the street door.)
Aurora
You never came to get the books!
Hyacinth
I didn't know we had an understanding I would.
Aurora
I've picked them out.
Hyacinth
That's awfully kind of you.
Aurora
Rosy will tell you where I live. She never forgets anything.
Hyacinth
She's a wonderful little witch. She terrifies me.
Aurora
Which do you think is the cleverer? Rosy or her brother?
Hyacinth
Oh, Paul will be Prime minister of England someday.
Aurora (pleased)
Do you believe that? I'm so glad.
Hyacinth
Why? You spend most of your time among the poor—and I'm sure you
carry blessings with you— But for what? Wretched company we must be.
Aurora
I like it very much—you don't understand.
Hyacinth
Precisely. I don't understand. How can you surround yourself with
squalor and disgusting company?
Aurora
Oh, I wish I could make you understand—
Hyacinth
Perhaps I do understand! Charity exists in your nature as a kind
of passion.
Aurora
Yes, yes, it is a kind of passion. Whatever it is, it's my life.
It's all I care for. When I was fifteen, I wanted to sell all I had to
give to the poor. And ever since—I've wanted with all my heart to do
something. It seemed as if my heart would break if I couldn't!
Hyacinth
I suppose you're very religious?
Aurora
I don't know. One has one's ideas. I think a great many clergymen
do good, but there are others I don't like at all. I don't like
society, and I don't think you would either if you saw much of it. At
least the kind there is in London. But I've got out of it. I like
Camberwell better. I'm a proper lunatic, you see. Well, I must go see
Rosy.
(Aurora exits to Rosy's room.)
Hyacinth
I'll be in presently.
(There is a knock at the street door. Hyacinth goes to it and
admits Madame Grandoni.)
Hyacinth
Madame Grandoni! What are you doing here?
Grandoni
I have come to see you. I went to your milliner's and she told me
you were here.
Hyacinth
I'm honored. But, why have you come?
Grandoni
My dear young man, may I take the liberty of asking your age?
Hyacinth
Certainly; I'm twenty-four.
Grandoni
And, I hope you're industrious—and—what do they call it in
England— steady?
Hyacinth
I don't think I'm very wild.
Grandoni
I don't know how one speaks in this country to young men like you.
You are evidently intelligent and clever—and if you're disappointed,
it will be a pity.
Hyacinth
Why should I be disappointed?
Grandoni
I dare say you expected great things from the Princess— You have
been to her house. A mansion— You must tell me if I upset you. I'm
very old fashioned.—I speak my mind.
Hyacinth
But, what is on it? I'm not easily upset. I only went to see her
because she was kind enough to send for me.
Grandoni
You're not like the young men I have in mind. All the more reason.
I came to warn you a little and I don't know how. If you were an
Italian it would be different.
Hyacinth
How so? What do you want to warn me of?
Grandoni
Well—only to advise you a little. Don't give up anything.
Hyacinth (laughing)
What do I have to give up?
Grandoni
Don't give up yourself. There are things better even than being
liked by a Princess, even a beautiful Princess. Hold fast to them.
Hyacinth
I think I understand you.
Grandoni
Before you go any farther, please think a little whether you are
right.
Hyacinth
I'm not sure—
Grandoni
There are many people, these days, who think it useful to throw
bombs into innocent crowds, and assassinate their own rulers—
Hyacinth
If I were to limit myself only to those means you approve of—?
Grandoni (very emphatically)
I don't approve of any means! I wish you well, young man. She
wants you to come again. you will, I see that. Don't say I didn't warn
you.
(Exit Madame Grandoni.)
Hyacinth
I—I'll remember.
(After a moment, Paul comes in.)
Paul
Rosy is making it pretty hot for me in there. So, I thought I'd
escape.
(A knock at the street door. Paul goes and admits Poupin.)
Poupin
Forty thousand men are unemployed.
Paul
They say it's a bad year.
Poupin
They say that on purpose—to convey the impression that there are
such things as good years. The good years are yet to come.
Paul
Hoffendahl's in London.
Poupin
Hoffendahl! That surprises me.— Are you sure?
Paul
Quite sure.
Poupin
You have seen him?
Paul
Yes.
Hyacinth
What has he done?
Poupin
He's spent twelve years in a Prussian prison.
Hyacinth
What of that?
Paul
A man's foremost duty is not to get collared. If you want to prove
you're capable, that's the way.
Poupin
Someone always gets caught.
Paul (to Hyacinth)
If they succeed in catching you, do as Hoffendahl has done. Suffer
silently without betraying your friends. But, if they don't—make it
your supreme duty—make it your religion to lie close—to keep
yourself for another go.
Poupin
That's fearfully English.
Paul
No doubt, no doubt. You shall never share my fate—if I have a
fate, and I can prevent your sharing it.
Hyacinth
What I want to know is, what's this Hoffendahl going to do for us?
Paul
That I don't know yet.
Poupin
What we need is a compact body in marching order.
Paul
I quite agree that the present state of things is infamous and
hellish.
Hyacinth
I'm ready for anything.
Paul
Upon my life, I believe you're game. Would you like to see
him—the real thing?
Hyacinth
The real thing?
Paul
A real revolutionary. You've never seen it, you only think you
have.
Hyacinth
Why haven't you shown me before?
Poupin
You weren't ready.
BLACKOUT
Prince (upset)
Never?
Grandoni
Surely, you know your wife as well as I do?
Prince
How can one know a woman like that? I hoped she'd see me five
little minutes.
Grandoni
For what purpose?
Prince
To rest my eyes on her beautiful face.
Grandoni
Did you come to England for that?
Prince
For what else should I have come? She is killing me inch by inch.
Grandoni
She'd be much more likely to kill you if you were living with her.
Prince
She hasn't killed you.
Grandoni
Oh, me? I'm past killing. I'm hard as stone. Our troubles don't
kill us—it's we who must kill them. I've buried not a few.
Prince (uninterested in her philosophy)
How does she look today?
Grandoni
As always. Like an angel.— I'm very sorry for you, Prince.
Prince
I wanted to see myself how she's living.
Grandoni
That's very natural.
Prince
I've been hearing things, lots of things.
Grandoni
Lots of rubbish, no doubt.
Prince
She spends a great deal of money.
Grandoni
Indeed, she does. She thinks she's a model of thrift. If there's a
virtue she prides herself on, it's her economy.
Prince
I wonder if she knows that I spend almost nothing at all? I'd
rather live on bread and water than that she should fail to make a
great appearance.
Grandoni
Her appearance is all that you could wish.
Prince
Why does this dreary country please her?
Grandoni
It's the common people.
Prince
That's what I've been hearing. Who was that man I met before?
Grandoni
The Princess's bookbinder.
Prince
Her bookbinder? You mean one of her lovers!
Grandoni
Prince, how can you ever dream she'll live with you again?
Prince
Why does she have him in her drawing room? Where were his books?
His bindings?
Grandoni
I told you—she's making a study of the people. The young man you
saw is a study—or part of it.
Prince
The more I know, the less I understand. Is it your idea that she's
quite crazy? I don't care if she is.
Grandoni
We are all quite crazy, I think. But the Princess no more than the
rest of us. She must try everything. At present she's trying
democracy.
Prince
And what do people say?
Grandoni
Oh, a lady can do anything in this country.
Prince
There are things it's better to conceal.
Grandoni
I may as well give you the key to your wife's conduct: she's
ashamed of having married you.
Prince
Ashamed! Ashamed to be a Princess of the House of Casamassima?
Grandoni
She considers that as the darkest hour of her life, she sold
herself to you for a title and a fortune. No matter that she wanted it
at the time. She will spend the rest of her life doing penance for
that sin.
Prince
I know she pretends to have been forced.— Well, if not the
bookbinder, what about this English Captain?
Grandoni
This English Captain?
Prince
Godfred Gerald Sholto.
Grandoni
He's the last one you need worry about. He doesn't count the least
bit.
Prince (dumbfounded)
Why doesn't he count?
Grandoni
Some people don't, you know. He knows better than to even think he
does.
Grandoni
Why not, when she receives him always—lets him go wherever she
goes?
Grandoni
He's a convenience—he works without wages.
Prince
Isn't he in love with her?
Grandoni
Of course. But he has no more hope than you do.
Prince
Ah, poor fellow.
Grandoni
He accepts the situation better than you do.
Prince
Because he is allowed to see her.
Grandoni
But she takes no notice of him.
Prince
I will go. But tell her I may come back.
Grandoni
It's utterly useless.
(The Prince bows to her very courteously and goes out. Grandoni
walks around uneasily, then sinks into a chair. Enter Hyacinth with
some books.)
Hyacinth
I'm afraid the books are very dusty.
Grandoni
The Princess will probably see you in a few hours.
Hyacinth
I really hope so.
Grandoni
People sometimes come and leave without seeing her. It all depends
on her mood.
Hyacinth
Even after she has sent for them?
Grandoni
Who can tell whether she has sent for them or not?
Hyacinth
But, she sent for me.
Grandoni
Oh yes, she sent for you, poor young man. Sholto has come like
that more than once, and gone away no better off.
Hyacinth
Captain Sholto?
Grandoni
She is a capriciossa.
Hyacinth
I don't understand the way you speak of her. You seem her friend,
yet you say things that are not very favorable to her.
Grandoni
I say much worse to her than I ever permit myself to say to you.
I'm rude, but I'm not treacherous. At any rate, you are here.
Hyacinth
Decidedly, I am here.
Grandoni
And, how long shall you stay? Pardon me if I ask. That's part of
my rudeness.
Hyacinth
Till tomorrow morning. I must be at my work by noon.
Grandoni
That will do very well. You remember I told you to remain
faithful?
Hyacinth
That was very good advice. But, I think you exaggerate my danger.
Grandoni
Impossible, I think. You're one of those types that ladies like. I
can be sure of that, I like you myself. At my age, a hundred and
twenty!— Be happy, make yourself comfortable; but go home tomorrow!
Perhaps I shall go tomorrow.
Hyacinth
I have to work. That's reason enough for me.
Grandoni
Do you admire everything here? Does it give you pleasure?
Hyacinth
So much! I cannot tell you how much!
Grandoni
Poor boy.
(Enter the Princess.)
Princess (addressing herself immediately to Hyacinth)
Is it true that you've never seen a park or any of the beauties of
nature?
Hyacinth
Perfectly true.
Princess
I'm so glad, I'm so glad. I've never been able to show anything
new to anyone, especially to a fine, sensitive mind.— This place is
tumbling to pieces. I don't want you to think I'm sunk in luxury and
throw money away. Never! Never!
Hyacinth
You live according to your means. I would live like this is I
could.
Princess
Would you? But, you must learn for yourself what it really is
before we blow it up. You and I are the barbarians, you know.
Hyacinth
You certainly don't look that part.
Princess
Oh, I am whether I look it or not.
Hyacinth
The aristocracy isn't all that bad.
Princess
If we believe in the coming democracy—why not try to put its
spirit in our lives? I try to do it in my relations with you—but you
hang ridiculously back. You're really not a bit democratic.
Hyacinth
I've been cautioned against you.
Princess
I can very easily understand that.— I've given no proofs as yet.
Who was it that warned you against me?
Hyacinth
A friend of mine in London—Paul Muniment.
Princess
Paul Muniment?
Hyacinth
I mentioned him to you the first time we met. He's awfully wise.
Princess
What does he know about me?
Hyacinth
Nothing except what I've told him.
Princess
Well, you mustn't have given me a very good character.— I like
his name, perhaps I should like him.
Hyacinth
You'd like him much better than you do me.
Princess
How do you know how much I like you or how little?— Never mind
that, I like you a good deal. Now tell me what's going on among your
friends. Is anything going to be done?— You think I'm a police spy,
don't you?
Hyacinth
The idea never occurred to me.
Princess
It should—if you're going to be a conspirator.
Hyacinth
If you were in with the police, you wouldn't waste your time with
me.
Princess
If would be my first care to make you think that. So much the
better if you've no troublesome suspicions.
Hyacinth
There isn't much to tell. I've taken an oath to sacrifice myself,
that's all.
Princess
To what?
Hyacinth
To whatever is asked. I gave my life away.
Princess
Be so good as to explain what you're talking about?
Hyacinth
I really do trust you, but I'll give you no names. There's no
special reason to go into details. They wanted an obliging man— Well,
the place was vacant, and I offered my services.
Princess (abstractedly)
I suppose you're right, we must pay for all we do. (after a
moment) I think I know the person into whose power you've placed
yourself.
Hyacinth
Possibly, but I doubt it.
Princess
You don't think I've gone that far? Why not?
Hyacinth
If you've gone that far, you've gone very far indeed.
Princess
Does he, by any chance, want an obliging young woman?
Hyacinth
I don't think he cares much for women.
Princess (lightly)
You've very nearly betrayed him to me. Have a care.
Hyacinth
I've seen the holy of holies. People go about thinking
everything's fine and all's well with the world. But, there's an
immense underground. The upper classes know nothing about it. A vast
trap is being prepared.
Princess
And so you've put your head in a noose. (pause) YOUR MAN'S
DIEDRICH HOFFENDAHL!
Hyacinth
—Well, you really have gone further than I thought.
Princess
So! You've taken a vow of blind obedience.
Hyacinth
Yes.
Princess
To kill if necessary?
Hyacinth
Yes.
Princess
It's very serious, isn't it? Very serious, indeed.
Hyacinth
The serious part is yet to come. For now, I simply wait.
Princess
Perhaps nothing will happen.
Hyacinth
That would be very disappointing. But I have decided to live each
day, each hour—as if it might be my last.
Princess
There will probably be a great many good days left.
Hyacinth
The more the better. Only, I no longer care for the things you
care for.
Princess
What are you talking about? We both believe in the same thing.
Hyacinth
Do we? From the moment I pledged my life to the people, I ceased
to give a damn about them!
Princess
You not longer care for the revolution?
Hyacinth
Not a damn!
Princess
You're very remarkable. You're splendid.
Hyacinth
I'd like to be.
Princess
Yes—I see that. You want to be one of them. Fancy the strange,
the bitter fate: to be a perfect gentleman in gesture and feeling, and
yet to look at the good things of life only through the glass of a
pastry cook's window.
Hyacinth
Every class has its humble pleasures.
Princess
So your act is purely disinterested?
Hyacinth
I think it is correct to describe it that way.
Princess
That's wonderful, really. Only no one will believe it, you know.
Hyacinth
That doesn't matter to me. I'm glad YOU know. You're the only one
I've spoken to.
Princess
I'm flattered. You must trust me a good deal.
Hyacinth
I told you I do.
Princess (suddenly)
I am going to introduce you to Lady Marchmont! Will you let me?
Hyacinth
Yes, of course, but—
Princess
Then come along. She's going to be here now.
Hyacinth
But, who is—
Princess
You'll see.
(Exit Princess and Hyacinth. After a moment Grandoni stirs in her
chair where she has been dozing. Sholto enters.)
Grandoni
I'm glad to see you! What good wind has brought you here?
Sholto
Didn't you know I was coming?
Grandoni
I know nothing of the affairs of this house. I've given them up at
last. I remain in my room, mostly. From the moment you come in it's a
little better. But, it's very bad.
Sholto
What's bad?
Grandoni
Perhaps you'll be able to tell me where Christina is heading? I've
always been faithful to her. I've always been loyal. But today, I've
lost my patience.
Sholto
I'm not sure what you're talking about, but if I understand you—I
think it's magnificent.
Grandoni
You're worse than she is: you delight in all her antics because
you're cynical. It passes all bounds. The scandal's too great.
Sholto
Dear Madame Grandoni, you cannot make it worse and you cannot make
it better. Actually, no scandal can possibly attach itself to our
friend.
Grandoni
What do you mean, when a lady has a bookbinder come live with her?
Sholto
It all depends who the lady is, and what she is.
Grandoni
She had better take care of one thing first—that she shall not
have been separated from her husband—with a hundred stories!
Sholto
The Princess can carry off even that.
Grandoni
Who's to know he's her bookbinder? It's the last thing you'd take
him for.
Sholto
She has chosen him carefully.
Grandoni
Carefully!
Sholto
It was I who chose him, dear lady.
Grandoni
It was a fine turn you did him, poor young man.
Sholto
Certainly, he'll be sacrificed. But haven't I been sacrificed?
Grandoni
I hope he bears it as well as you! It's too bad to spoil him for
his station in life. How can he ever go back?
Sholto
Too bad! He's an abominable little conspirator with I don't know
what bloody ideas. He gets what he deserves.
Grandoni
And, what does Christina deserve?
Sholto
Oh, lots of punishment. But it won't be the loss of reputation.
She's too distinguished.
Grandoni
Why not?
Sholto
Because she has no regard for public opinion. Because she can do
without it, it will never be taken from her.
Grandoni
At least you make another person in the house. So long as you are
here, I won't go off.
Sholto
Depend upon it, I shall hang on tight, till I am turned off.
Grandoni
How can you stand it?
Sholto
I want to watch what becomes of the little beggar.
Grandoni
He's much too good for his fate. You're horrible.
Sholto
And pray, wasn't I too good for mine?
Grandoni (dryly)
By no means!
(Hyacinth enters and Grandoni retires to her chair.)
Sholto
Good morning, my dear fellow, I thought I should find you here.
Hyacinth
Who told you I was here?
Sholto
Why, I knew the Princess was capable of asking you, so—when I
learned you were out of town, I concluded you must be here.
Hyacinth
I see. You're sure Millicent didn't tell you?
Sholto
Have you still got your back up a little?
Hyacinth
Not at all.
Sholto
You have no reason at all to be jealous.
Hyacinth
No.
Sholto
Just because you met her in the street after you met me in the
same neighborhood is no reason to think she was coming to meet me.
Hyacinth
I agree perfectly.
(Pause.)
Sholto
How are you coming on? With the Princess, I mean.
Hyacinth
Very well, thank you.
Sholto
You understand my interest in you: I'm your sponsor. I put you
forward.
Hyacinth
There are a great many things in the world I don't understand—but
the thing I understand least is your interest in me. If I were you, I
wouldn't give a damn for the sort of person I happen to be!
Sholto
That proves how different my nature is from yours! But, I don't
believe it, my dear boy, you're too generous for that.— It's very
grand, her having brought you down here. I wanted to see it with my
own eyes.
Hyacinth
Hardly surprising, considering I was put forward by you.
Sholto
It doesn't make any difference to her. It never signifies a lot to
her what I may think. Look here, one good turn deserves another—get
her to—put me forward, will you?
Hyacinth
I don't understand you. Surely you don't mean with Millicent?
Sholto (laughing amiably)
It isn't possible you're jealous? I don't mean Miss Henning.— The
courage of it, the insolence of it, there isn't another woman in
England who could carry it off.
Hyacinth
That's nothing. Just now she introduced me to Lady Marchmont.
Sholto
God, did she dare do that? I'd have given ten pounds just to see
it. There's no one like her. Did you enjoy meeting the wife of our
noble prime minister?
Hyacinth
Too much. Such excesses are dangerous. Well, I shall ask the
Princess to keep you.
Sholto
Lucky little beggar, with your fireside talks! Where does she sit
now in the evening? Never mind! I told you she's the cleverest woman
in Europe. But there are some mysteries you can't see into unless you
have a heart. Our Princess isn't troubled by that sort of thing. My
only motive is to watch her, adore her, to see her lead her life, and
act out her extraordinary nature. The rest's mere gabble.
Hyacinth
You don’t' care for the social question, then?
Sholto
I only took it up because she did. My dear Robinson, for me
there's only one thing in life: to look at that woman when I can. Get
her to keep me here.
Hyacinth
I'll use what influence I have, but—
Sholto
It would be an act of common humanity.
Hyacinth
You took up the social question because she did? But why did she
take it up?
Sholto
You'll have to worm that out of her yourself.
Hyacinth
Do you mean the way she treats you proves she has no heart? What
you said just now—
Sholto
I mean the way she treats you!
Hyacinth
You think I'm heading for a fall?
Sholto
Don't say I didn't warn you. The day I saw she was turning her
attention to the rising democracy, I began to collect little
democrats. That's how I collected you.
BLACKOUT
Vetch
Dear Mr. Robinson, I'm so sorry for you. I wanted to write, but I
promised Pinnie I wouldn't. It wouldn't have killed her if she had
been like you or me. The doctor says she was impoverished—so weak and
low she had nothing to go on.
Hyacinth
I don't know what to say to you. I can never blame you when you're
so kind, but I wish to God I had known. Don't you think you might have
written me a word?
Vetch
No responsibility in my life has ever distressed me more. There
were obvious reasons for calling you back, but Pinnie insisted that
you must finish your visit. It was very difficult.
Hyacinth
I can imagine nothing more simple. When your nearest and dearest
are dying, you're usually sent for.
Vetch
My dear boy, this case was exceptional. Your visit to the Princess
Casamassima had an aura of importance.
Hyacinth
It's not important at all.
Vetch
Pinnie made a tremendous point of your not being disturbed. If she
had been dying in a corner like a starved cat, she would have faced
her fate alone, rather than cut short your visit by a single hour.
Hyacinth
She spun her ideas—she always did,—out of nothing.
Vetch
She had made up her mind that you had formed a connection by means
of which someday, by some means, you will eventually come into your
own. — We had to leave her that idea.
Hyacinth
Yes, of course. I'm glad I furnished Pinnie such entertaining
ideas.
Vetch
Is she really a Princess?
Hyacinth (absently)
What? Yes, of course.
Vetch
If I can help you in any way, you must lean on me.
Hyacinth
That's just what I was going to say to you.
Vetch
Have you been making love to this Princess?
Hyacinth
It's not that way.
Vetch
Has she been making love to you then?
Hyacinth
If you saw her, you wouldn't think that—
Vetch
How shall I ever see her?
Hyacinth
It's not impossible. If you like, I shall introduce you now.
(Vetch shakes his head sadly) She wants to meet all my friends in the
Place. She'd be very interested in you because of your opinions.
Vetch
Ah, I've no opinions now. I only had them to frighten Pinnie.
Hyacinth (wryly)
She was easily frightened.
Vetch
And easily reassured. But, take care this great lady doesn't lead
you too far.
Hyacinth
How do you mean?
Vetch
Isn't she a conspirator? A dabbler in plots and treasons?
Hyacinth
You should see this place. You should see what she wears—
Vetch
You mean she's inconsistent? My dear boy, she'd be a strange woman
if she wasn't. Pinnie left you some money. She had insurance, would
you believe it? Twenty pounds.
Hyacinth
Well, for me that's a small fortune. Too bad she didn’t' have the
use of it.
Vetch
She had hoped you'd go abroad and see the world. She had a
particular wish you'd go to Paris.
Hyacinth
Ah, Paris!
Vetch
She would have liked you to take a little run down to Italy.
Hyacinth
Doubtless that would be very jolly. But there's a limit to what
twenty pounds can buy.
Vetch
I propose to add my savings.
Hyacinth
That's very kind, but you're getting along and may need it.
Vetch
My dear boy, I shall look to you to be the support of my old age.
Hyacinth
You may do so with perfect confidence, so far as it lies within my
power. But there is the danger you mentioned earlier. The trifling
problem of my being imprisoned or hanged.
Vetch
It's precisely because I think the danger will be less if you go
abroad, that I urge you most passionately to take the chance.
Hyacinth
It is certainly a temptation. Something I should very much like to
do.
Vetch
I believe it was Pinnie's dearest wish. Do it for her.
Hyacinth
I will give it careful consideration. But I have obligations—
Vetch
I am sure, I am sure.
(Hyacinth and Vetch embrace, and Hyacinth exits. Vetch shakes his
head sadly and is about to leave when Madame Grandoni appears.)
Grandoni
Mr. Vetch! Please do not go away, the Princess Casamassima has
learned you are here and wishes to speak to you. She had received your
note.
(Exit Grandoni and enter Princess.)
Princess
I know who you are, I know who you are.
Vetch
I wonder if you also know what I would like to speak to you about?
Princess
No, but it doesn't matter, I am very glad. You must know how much
interest I take in your nephew.
Vetch
It's for his sake I ventured—
Princess
I hope you won't ask me to give him up?
Vetch
On the contrary, on the contrary—
Princess
Surely he doesn't think I shall cease to be his friend?
Vetch (very excited)
I don't know what he thinks, I don't know what he hopes. Properly
speaking, it's no business of mine. I'm not really a blood relation. I
thank you for your great kindness to him.
Princess (considering)
All the same, I don't think you like it.
Vetch
He has told me very little about you. He doesn't know I have taken
this step.
Princess
Step? That's what people say when they're doing something
disagreeable.
Vetch
I seldom call on ladies. Now that I see you, now that I hear you,
I begin to understand. Is there any chance that Hyacinth will return
while I am here?
Princess
I have given Madame Grandoni instructions to occupy him until you
are safely away.
Vetch
Please don't tell him we have met.
Princess
I won't, but he'll guess it. He's incredibly intuitive.
Vetch
How well you know him.
Princess
I'm extremely curious as to what you have to say to me. I remember
about you now. You were a great democrat in the old days, but of late,
you've ceased to care about the people.
Vetch
I see you think I'm a renegade. (excitedly) What I want is
this—that you'll—that you'll—
Princess
That I will——?
Vetch
Princess, I'd give my own life for that boy— You've taken
possession of his life.
Princess
Yes. But as I understand you, you don't complain of it! I know the
terrible story of his mother.
Vetch
It was my fault he ever heard of it. I thought it would do him
good. I don't know what was in my head. I wanted him to quarrel with
society. Now I want him reconciled to it.
Princess
Ah, but he is! He's a perfect little aristocrat.
Vetch
Those are not the opinions he expresses to me. He said only the
other day that he would regard himself as the most contemptible of
human beings if he did nothing.
Princess
I assure you the misery of the people is by no means always on his
mind. He thinks civilization will be sacrificed utterly if the
ignorant masses get the upper hand.
Vetch
He needn't be afraid. That will never happen.
Princess
We can at least try.
Vetch (passionately)
Try what you like, Madame, but for God's sake, get the boy out of
this! The world's very sad and hideous, and I am happy to say that I
shall soon have done with it. But before I go, I want to save the
child! If he doesn't believe in it, what's he in it for, Madame? What
devilish folly has he undertaken?
Princess (after a pause)
He's a strange mixture of contradictory impulses. How can I go
into his affairs with you? How can I tell you his secrets. I don't
know them, and if I did—well, fancy me!
Vetch
Why do you take such a line? Why do you believe such things?
Princess
My dear sir, how do you know what I believe? You think me
affected, but I'm only trying to be natural. And you? Are you not
yourself a little contradictory? You don't want our young friend to
pry into the misery of the people—because it excites his sense of
justice—
Vetch
I don't care a fig for his sense of justice—or the misery of the
people. I only want to help him, to get him free.
Princess
Don't misrepresent him. He's one of the most civilized men in the
world.
Vetch
I don't understand you. If you like him because he's one of the
lower orders, how can you like him because he's a civilized little
aristocrat?
Princess
Dear Mr. Vetch, I'm not bound to explain myself to you. Nothing is
more annoying than to have one's sincerity questioned. Let us say, he
has his charms.— Come, pull yourself together. We both take an
interest in him, and I can't see why we should quarrel about him.
Vetch
God knows, I don't want to quarrel. I only want to get Hyacinth
free.
Princess
Free from what?
Vetch
From some abominable secret brotherhood, some league of assassins
that he belongs to—the thought of which keeps me awake at night. He's
just the sort of impressionable youngster to be made a catspaw.
Princess
What grounds have you for believing this?
Vetch (a little more calmly)
Well, a great many; none of them very definite. His appearance,
his manner— Dear lady, one feels those things, one guesses. I've
appealed to the Poupins, and they assure me that he's as dear to them
as their own child. That doesn't comfort me much for the simple reason
that the old woman would be delighted to see her own son a martyr of
the revolution. It may all be rubbish—but it's dangerous rubbish.
Princess
Don't speak to me of the French; I've never cared for them.
Vetch
That's awkward if you're a social revolutionary. You're likely to
meet them.
Princess
Why do you call me a socialist? I hate cheap labels. What is it
you suspect—for you must suspect something?
Vetch
Well, that he may have drawn some accursed lot to do some idiotic
thing—something in which he doesn't believe.
Princess
If he doesn't believe in it, he can easily let it alone.
Vetch
Do you think he's a type to back out of his word?
Princess
One can never judge people in that way until they're tested.
Haven't you ever taken the trouble to ask him?
Vetch
What would be the use? He'd tell me nothing.
Princess
I still don't see exactly how I am to help you.
Vetch
Do you want him to commit some atrocity?
Princess
Certainly not. Trust me and trust him, too. He's a gentleman and
will behave as a gentleman.
Vetch
That's exactly what I'm afraid of.
Princess
Leave him to me—
Vetch
I've supposed for a long time that it was you or his chemist
friend who got him into this scrape. It was you I suspected most—but
if it isn't you, then—
Princess
I begin to lose patience with you! You had better go to him then!
Vetch
Of course, I'll go to him. I scarcely know him, but I'll speak my
mind.
Princess
Better not! Leave him quiet. Leave him to me.
Vetch
Why not, why not? Doesn't he know?
Princess
No, he doesn't know; he has nothing to do with it. You'll spoil
everything. Leave Paul Muniment to me. Leave him to me.
Vetch (going)
I beg you, I beg you.
Princess
Rest assured, I will not let our friend come to any harm if I can
help it.
Vetch
Thank you,—thank you very much. (bowing, he goes out)
(The Princess stands lost in thought for a few moments. Grandoni
comes in.)
Grandoni
Mr. Muniment.
(Exit Grandoni. Enter Paul.)
Princess
So, you've come! I didn't have to repeat my invitation.
Paul
It wouldn't have done you any good if you had.
Princess
My silence wasn't accidental.
Paul
I've only come now because my sister has hammered it at me that I
ought to. I've been under the lash! If she had left me alone, I
shouldn't have come.
Princess
You practice a racy sort of frankness. I'm not used to failing
when it comes to men.
Paul
Naturally, the awkward things I say amuse you.
Princess
Not at all! You simply are different—although I expected you to
be like this. I know you a good deal already.
Paul
From Robinson, I suppose.
Princess
More particularly from Lady Aurora.
Paul
Oh, she doesn't know much about me.
Princess
More than you think I fancy. She likes you.
Paul
Yes, she likes me.
Princess
And, I hope you like her.
Paul
Aye, she's a dear old girl.
Princess
I don't know that there's anyone I envy so much. She's got out of
herself better than anyone I've ever known. She's submerged herself in
the passion of helping others. That's why I envy her.
Paul (dryly)
It's an amusement like any other.
Princess
Don't belittle her. She has made a great many people less
wretched!
Paul
How many, eh?
Princess
Well, one who's very near and dear to you.
Paul
Rosy makes Lady Aurora considerably less wretched!
Princess
Very likely, of course, as she does me.
Paul
What are you wretched about?
Princess
Why nothing at all, and everything! Still, I've been able to do
some good.
Paul
For the poor, you mean?
Princess
Not yet. It's the convictions I've come to.
Paul
Convictions are a sort of innocent pleasure.
Princess
Having convictions is nothing. It's acting on them.
Paul
Doubtless.
Princess
It's far better, of course, when one's a man.
Paul
Women do pretty well what they like. My sister and you have
managed between you to bring me to this.
Princess
More your sister than I. But why are you so reluctant to come?
Paul
Because I don't know what to make of you.
Princess
Most people don't. But why not come see for yourself?
Paul
And, being a prudent man, I hesitate to venture—
Princess
You consider very carefully what you attempt?
Paul
That I do—I do.
Princess
To do anything in association with you would be very safe—it
would be sure to succeed.
Paul
That's what Robinson thinks. Poor fellow.
Princess
I care for him very much.
Paul
He's a sweet little lad, and putting Lady Aurora aside, he's quite
the light of our little home.
Princess
Wouldn't someone else do his work quite as well?
Paul
I'm told he's a master hand.
Princess
I don't mean his bookbinding.
Paul
Ah, that work.
Princess
Let me do it. I want to do something for the cause you represent.
Try me, try me. I'm not trifling. No, I'm not trifling.
Paul
I was afraid you'd be like this.
Princess
Like what?
Paul
Very persuasive. Very convincing. I've always had a fear of clever
women.
Princess
You're the sort of man who ought to know how to use them.
Paul
I ought to—you're right.
Princess
I should like to do it in his place—that's what I should like.
Paul
You've got a lovely home.
Princess
Lovely? My dear, it's hideous.
Paul
Well, I like it.
Princess
You should have seen me before.
Paul
I wish I had. I like solid wealth.
Princess
You're as bad as Hyacinth. I'm the only consistent one.
Paul
I'd give my nose for such a place as this. You're not reduced to
poverty.
Princess
I've a little left.
Paul
I'd lay a wager you've a great deal.
Princess
I could get money—I could get money.
Paul (going)
I don't trust women—I don't trust clever women.
Princess
Will you come back?
Paul
Yes, I'll come back.
(Exit Paul. After a moment, enter Grandoni.)
Grandoni
And, who may that be? Isn't that a new face?
Princess
He's a brother of the little person I took you to see— The
chattering cripple with the wonderful manners.
Grandoni
Ah, she had a brother! So that was why you went.
Princess
There could have been no question of our seeing him. He was at his
work.
Grandoni
And, is he to be the successor?
Princess
The successor?
Grandoni
To the little bookbinder?
Princess
What an absurd question!
(The Princess goes out angrily. Grandoni sinks into a chair and
begins to knit. The Prince enters.)
Prince
What a black little hole it is. My wife should live here.
Grandoni
My dear friend, for all she's your wife—
Prince
It's true—it's true! She has lovers! I've seen it with my own
eyes and I've come here to know!
Grandoni
Coming here won't help you much. If you're seen, you know for
yourself.
Prince
You're afraid! You're afraid!
Grandoni
Sit down and be quiet, very quiet. I've ceased to pay attention.
Prince
Do you know she's gone to a house in a horrible quarter?
Grandoni
I think it highly probably, dear Prince.
Prince
And who is he? What does she want there? That's what I want to
discover.
Grandoni
I haven't seen him—how can I tell you?
Prince
Is that kind to me—when I've counted on you?
Grandoni
I'm not kind any more, I'm angry.
Prince
Then, why don't you watch her, eh?
Grandoni
It's not her I'm angry with, it's myself.
Prince (puzzled)
For what?
Grandoni
For staying in this house.
Prince
What a house for a Princess! She might at lest live in a manner
befitting her.
Grandoni
The last time you thought it too expensive.
Prince
Is it because things are so bad you must go? He was in the house
for over an hour. I saw him come. I saw him go. Who is he? This new
one?
Grandoni
Was it for this you came to London? You had better go back to
Rome.
Prince
Of course, I'll go back. But only if you tell me who this one is!
How can you be so ignorant, dear friend, when he comes freely in and
out of this place?
Grandoni
I sit in my room almost always now. I only come down to eat.
Prince
Better if you sat here. You could at least answer my questions.
Grandoni
I haven't the least desire to answer them. You must remember that
I'm not here as your spy.— He's a chemist's assistant.
Prince
A chemist's assistant. And the other one is a bookbinder.
Grandoni
Oh, him.— You must wait till I'm free.
Prince
Free?
Grandoni
I must choose. I must hold my tongue if I stay. If I go away, I
can tell you what I've seen—and plenty there is I've seen—more than
I ever expected to.
Prince
Dearest friend, tell me this. Where does she go? For the love of
God, what is that house?
Grandoni
I know nothing of their houses.
Prince
Then, there are others? There are many?
Grandoni
There's a conspiracy.
Prince
You mean she's joined a secret society? Anarchists? But, perhaps,
they only pretend?
Grandoni
Pretend? That's not Christina's way! She has gone to those houses
to break up society. She's very much entangled. She has relations with
people who are watched by the police.
Prince
And, is she watched by the police?
Grandoni
It's very possible.
Prince
Will she bring us to that scandal?
Grandoni
There's a chance she may get tired of it. Only the scandal may
come before that.
Prince
She shall not break up society!
Grandoni
No, she'll bore herself to death before the coup is ripe. Give her
time—give her time.
Prince
Give her time to muddy my name—
Grandoni
You can say nothing that I haven't said to her.
Prince
And how does she defend herself?
Grandoni
Defend herself? Did Christina ever do that! The only thing she
says to me is: Don't be afraid. I promise you, by all that's sacred,
you personally shan't suffer.— She speaks as if she had the power.
That's all very well. No doubt I'm a selfish old pig, but after all
one has a heart for others, too—
Prince
And so have I. Give her time—it's certain she'll take it whether
I give it or no. But I can, at least, stop giving her money.
Grandoni
She says you don't give her much.
Prince
It's enough to make all these scoundrels flock around her.
Grandoni
They're not scoundrels. That's the tiresome part of it.
Prince
Does this chemist take her money?
Grandoni
Perhaps—
Prince
Gigolo of revolution! And the famous Captain Sholto?
Grandoni
I haven't seen him for some time.
Prince
He doesn't like chemists and bookbinders?
Grandoni
It was he who first brought the bookbinder here—to please your
wife.
Prince
And they've turned him out. Now, if only someone could turn them
out.
Grandoni
Very true.
Prince
And the bookbinder. Is he still proposed for our admiration, or
has he paid the penalties of his crimes?
Grandoni
His star is on the wane.
Prince
Poor fellow! Is the chemist his successor?
Grandoni
In some manner, I think so—
(Enter Hyacinth.)
Hyacinth
Excuse me, I wasn't aware you had company.
Grandoni
My visitor's going—but, I'm going, too. I'm all upset, therefore,
kindly excuse me.
Prince
One moment, one moment. Please introduce me to the gentleman.
Grandoni (indicating the Prince to Hyacinth)
Prince Casamassima. He knows who you are.— If you talk long, she
may come back.
(Exit Grandoni.)
Prince
Will you permit me to keep you one little minute? With Madame
Grandoni I spoke of you. She told me you've changed your opinions. You
desire no more the assassination of the rich?
Hyacinth
I've never desired any such thing!
Prince
Ah, no doubt I was mistaken. But today, you think we must have
patience? That's also my view.
Hyacinth
Oh yes, we must have patience.
Prince
If I'm not mistaken, you know very well the Princess.
Hyacinth
She's been very kind to me.
Prince
She's my wife—perhaps you know—
Hyacinth
Yes.
Prince
Of course, you think it strange, my conversation. I want you—I
want you to tell me something. To what house has she gone? Will you
tell me that? She has gone to a house where they conspire—where they
prepare horrible acts. Does she go only for the revolution—or does
she go to be alone with him?
Hyacinth
With him?
Prince
With this chemist friend of yours?
Hyacinth
With him? I know nothing of the matter. (hastily) And, I don't
care.
Prince
Then it's not true that you hate those abominations?
Hyacinth
Oh yes, I hate those abominations.
Prince
I hoped you would help me.
Hyacinth
When we're in trouble, we can't help each other much.
BLACKOUT
Princess (noticing Hyacinth)
I'm very glad of your return.
Hyacinth (a little taken aback)
Well, how did you come here?
Princes
Oh, I get about. Captain Sholto brought me a week ago. I took the
liberty of coming again, by myself today—because I wanted to see the
whole family. (to Paul, with a hard note) When I come to see
gentlemen, I like to find them.
Hyacinth
I was disappointed when I called at your house in South Street.
Princess
Oh, I've given up that house, and taken a quite different one.
(If Hyacinth expects to learn where the house is, he's to be
disappointed, for the Princess does not tell him.)
Hyacinth
Is Madame Grandoni still at her post? You ought to bring her to
see Rosy.
Rosy
I'm sure I'd be most happy to receive any friend of the Princess
Casamassima.
Princess
I'd be happy to bring her—but she left.
Hyacinth
She left?
Princess
Yes, two days ago.
Hyacinth
It's too bad. I should like to have said goodbye to her.
Princess
You may imagine how I feel it.
Hyacinth
You mean the eyes of the world—
Princess
She couldn't put up with me any more. I'm too much of a scandal.
Hyacinth
What will she do?
Princess
I suppose she'll go and live with my husband. Funny, isn't it,
that it should always be one of us—and that it matters so little
which?
Hyacinth
She kept threatening a long time.
Princess
Oh, yes.
Paul (trying to break the tension)
You ought to tell us about foreign parts and the grand things
you've seen. Except that our distinguished visitor must know all about
them. (to Princess) Surely, you've seen nothing more worthy of your
respect than Camberwell?
Princess
Is this the worst part?
Paul
The worst, Madame? What grand ideas you must have! We admire
Camberwell immensely.
Rosy
It's my brother's ideas that are grand. He wants everything
changed. As if dirty people won't always make everything dirty. If
everyone were clean, where would be the merit? You'd get no merit for
keeping yourself tidy. Still, if it's a question of soap, everyone can
begin with himself. My brother thinks the whole world ought to be as
handsome as Brompton.
Princess
That's where all the artists and literary people live, isn't it?
Paul
Oh, I like Camberwell better than that.
Princess
I don't care about the artists.
Paul
Not when they've painted you such beautiful pictures? We know all
about them—Mr. Robinson has told us all about your precious
possessions.
Rosy
Was it all make-believe?
Princess
I've nothing in the world but the clothes on my back!
Hyacinth
I meant the things in the house.
Princess
There are no things in my house now.
Rosy
I shouldn't like that. Everything here belongs to me.
Princess
That's nice, of course, but—
Rosy
Do you think it's not right to have a lot of things about?
Princess
One must settle that for oneself. I don't like to be surrounded by
things I don't care for. When thousands have no bread to put in their
mouths, I can dispense with tapestry and old china.
Rosy
But, don't you think we ought to make the world more beautiful?
Princess
The world can wait to become beautiful until it becomes good
enough. Is there anything so ugly as unjust privileges? When we want
to beautify, we must begin at the right end.
Rosy
Surely, there are none of us, but what have our privileges. What
do you say to mine: entertaining a Princess. If everyone was equal,
where would be the gratification I feel in getting a visit from a
grandee? No, no—no equality while I'm about.
(Enter Lady Aurora.)
Aurora (to Princess)
I'm so glad you waited. I was late.
Princess
Lady Aurora has graciously offered to take me to some of the other
families she visits.
Aurora
Can you go now? We'll be late.
Princess
Yes, of course.
(The Princess and Lady Aurora exit.)
Rosy
Lady Aurora and the Princess seem to have become good friends.
Paul
What in the mischief does she want of her?
Hyacinth
What do you mean?
Paul
What does the beauty of beauties want of our poor plain lady? She
has a totally different stamp. I don't know much about women, but I
can see that.
Rosy
They both have the stamp of their rank.
Hyacinth
Who can tell what women want at any time?
Paul
Trouble with Millicent? Well, my boy, if you don't know more than
that, you disappoint me. Perhaps, if we wait long enough she'll tell
us.
Hyacinth
About Lady Aurora?
Paul
I don't mind about Lady Aurora so much; but what in the name of
long journeys does she want with her?
Rosy
Don't you think you're worth a long journey? I'd go from one end
of England to the other to make your acquaintance. He's in love with
the Princess and he asks those senseless questions to cover it up.
Hyacinth
Are you sweet on her?
Paul
Sweet on her, sweet on her, my boy! I might just as well be sweet
on the Dome of Saint Paul's.
Rosy
The Dome on Saint Paul's doesn't come to see you, and ask you to
return the visit.
Paul
I don't return visits. I don't put myself out for the Princess.
Isn't that sufficient answer to your accusations?
Hyacinth
I'm not sure. Your hanging off is more suspicious. It may mean you
don't trust yourself, that you're afraid.
Paul
I should think my making up to her would suit your book.
Hyacinth
Do you suppose I'm afraid of you? Besides, why should I care now?
Rosy
What do you mean by that?
Paul (quickly)
He's just being mysterious. Pay no attention to him.
(Paul and Hyacinth come forward away from Rosy and talk low.)
Hyacinth
I didn't want to make a scene—but how will you like it when I'm
strung up on the gallows?
Paul
You mean Hoffendahl's job?
Hyacinth
I didn't mean to speak of it, especially in front of Rosy, but it
naturally came to my mind. I've been thinking about it a good deal.
Paul
What good does that do? You don't like it. Do you want to give it
up?
Hyacinth
Not in the least. But, did you suppose I liked it?
Paul
My dear fellow, how could I tell? You like a lot of things I
don't. You like excitement and emotions—whereas I go in for holy
calm—for sweet repose.
Hyacinth
If you prefer calm, why do you associate yourself with a terrorist
organization?
Paul (chuckling)
Isn't our movement as quiet as the grave?
Hyacinth
I see. You take only the quiet parts.
Paul
I'm as likely to be beside you on the gallows for all that. Look,
there's one thing to remember—Hoffendahl may choose never to call on
you.
Hyacinth
Somehow, I don't fancy either you or he get mixed up in things
that don't come off.
Paul
There are three or four definite chances in your favor.
Hyacinth
I don't want second rate comfort.
Paul
What the devil do you want?
Hyacinth
Oh, to know how you feel about it—exactly what good you think it
will do?
Paul
The execution, eh? Well, putting it at its worst, possibly none at
all. It's intended as a warning, an admonishment.
Hyacinth
An admonishment!
Paul
They must learn they can't get away with it without paying a
price.
Hyacinth
But, why strike at individuals?
Paul
Because we cannot effectively strike at the whole system—much as
we would prefer to. There's no Bastille to storm—and if there were,
we haven't the wherewithal to storm it. So we must be content with
small, symbolic acts.
Hyacinth
I should rather storm the Bastille.
Paul
Amen. But that was in the days before machine guns were invented.
Rosy
Will you two stop conspiring and pay some attention to me? I
really am getting annoyed.
BLACKOUT
Milly
Whatever are you prowling about here for? You're up to no good,
I'll be bound.
Hyacinth
Sorry if I frightened you. I was about to knock.
Milly
That's all right. Gave me a start.
Hyacinth
Where were you going so fast? What are you doing?
Milly
Well, I never did see such a manner—from one that knocks about
like you! I'm going to see a friend. Have you anything to say to that?
Hyacinth (archly)
On what errand of mercy, on what secret mission?
Milly
Secret yourself! Why aren't you with your Princess instead of
spying on me?
Hyacinth
Are you playing me false, Miss Henning?
Milly
False, false! You're a pretty one to talk of falsity when a woman
has only to leer at you from an opera box—
Hyacinth
Don’t' say anything about her!
Milly
And pray, why not about her, I should like to know? You don't
pretend she's a decent woman, I suppose.
Hyacinth
You're not really jealous of anyone. You pretend that only to
throw dust in my eyes.
Milly
If you've come to see me, only to make low jokes at my expense,
you had better have stayed away altogether. In the first place, it's
rude, in the second place, it's silly, and in the third place, I see
through you.
Hyacinth
My dear Milly, the motions you go through, the resentment you
profess, are all a kicking up of dust which I blow away with a breath.
(gesturing as puffing away a cloud of smoke) But go on, say anything
you like.
Milly
The first thing I require of any friend is that he should respect
me. You had a bad life, I know what to think about that.
Hyacinth
It's good to be with you. You understand everything.
Milly
I understand everything you like. You little rascal—has your
Princess given you the sack?
Hyacinth
It may well be.
Milly
I'm glad you admit that!
Hyacinth
I'm a bigger Philistine than you, Miss Henning.
Milly
I don't believe you know, with all your thinking, what you do
think.
Hyacinth
It's astonishing how you sometimes put your finger on things. I
intend to think no more. I mean to give it up. Let us live in the
present hour.
Milly
I don't care how I live, nor where I live, so long as I can do as
I like. You were never satisfactory to me as a friend—and I consider
myself remarkably good natured to have kept you so little up to the
mark. You never tell me anything!
Hyacinth
What is it you want me to tell you, dear child? I'll tell you
anything in life you like.
Milly
You'll tell me no end of rot. Certainly, I tried kindness on you.
Hyacinth (good naturedly)
Try it again. Don't give up.
Milly
Well then, has she chucked you?
(Hyacinth turns away.)
Milly
THE BITCH!
Hyacinth
Milly, you're a sweetheart!
Milly
Why didn't you say so right away? I wouldn't have been so rough
with you.
Hyacinth
This isn't rough.
Milly (holding him)
You're trembling.
Hyacinth
Very likely. I'm a nervous wreck, you know.
Milly
You need sympathy.
Hyacinth
A tablespoon twice a day.
Milly
I like you now.
Hyacinth
It's a pity I've always been so terribly under the influence of
women. The sex in general has been very nice to me.
Milly
Does she know—your trumpery Princess?
Hyacinth
About my vow? Yes—but she doesn't mind.
Milly
That's most uncommonly kind of her.
Hyacinth
You know nothing about her.
Milly
How do you know what I know, please? Hasn't she treated you most
shamelessly—and you a reg'lar dear?
Hyacinth
Not in the least. My opinions have changed and hers
haven't—that's all.
Milly
And your grand lady still goes in for costermongers?
Hyacinth
Something has to be done and she wants to do it. I have too many
scruples.
Milly
If she hasn't kicked you out, why do you say she has?
Hyacinth
I don't know; I can't make it out. Something has happened, but I
don't know what it is.
Milly
Well, I can make it out! You silly baby, has Paul been making up
to her Serene Highness? Is that his game? Do you mean to say she'd
look at the likes of him?
Hyacinth
Paul! He's as fine a man as any born. They've the same views.
They're doing the same work.
Milly
And probably sleeping in the same bed! It makes WORK easier.
Hyacinth (protesting)
That's enough, Milly, I won't have you—
Milly
So, he hasn't changed his opinions, then—not like you?
Hyacinth
No, he knows what he wants, he knows what he thinks.
Milly
Oh, I dare say. Don't be a saint, they're a precious pain.
Hyacinth
A man shouldn't turn on his friends.
Milly
Or betray him with his woman. You need someone to fight for you!
Hyacinth
My dear girl, you're a comfort.
(There is a knock at the door. Milly looks uncomfortable, but
straightening her shoulders, goes to the door.)
Hyacinth
You know, you still haven't told me where you were going?
(Milly opens the door and admits Captain Sholto who is armed with a
large bouquet of flowers.)
Sholto
My dear Miss Henning, when you were late—ah, my dear Robinson, I
haven't seen you in some time, delighted.
Hyacinth (perceiving the situation immediately, turns on his
heel and walks out)
I was just leaving.
Sholto
But, do stay, my dear fellow. Has there been some quarrel? Allow
me to be the peacemaker.
BLACKOUT
Vetch
Oh, I didn't hear you. You're very quiet.
Hyacinth
You've been asleep.
Vetch
No, I've not been asleep. I don't sleep much these days.
Hyacinth
Then, you're meditating.
Vetch
Yes, I've been thinking. I'm glad to see you. I've been looking at
your books. You do find work—you're a master. With such a hand you'll
make a fortune and become famous.
Hyacinth
How many bookbinders have ever become famous?
Vetch
Well—
Hyacinth
My dear old friend, you've something on your mind.
Vetch
You read my thoughts. I've forced myself to let you alone.
Hyacinth
You had better let me come live with you as I suggested after
Pinnie's death.
Vetch
Will you, my boy? Will you come tonight?
Hyacinth
Tonight?
Vetch
Tonight has worried me more than any other. I got to thinking of
Pinnie. If I believed in ghosts, I should believe I had seen her.
Then, I could bear it no longer, and I came here.
Hyacinth
Why don't you spend the night on my bed? I'll sleep on the floor.
Vetch
No, no.
Hyacinth
It won't be any different in your room.
Vetch
I'll get another room.
Hyacinth
At this time of night? Your reason totters on its throne.
Vetch
Very good. We'll get a room tomorrow.
Hyacinth
But, I have to give a month's notice here.
Vetch
Ah, you're backing out!
Hyacinth
Pinnie wouldn't have said that. She'd have believed me.
Vetch
If you'll make me a promise, I'll believe that.
Hyacinth
Any promise you like.
Vetch
Oh, that isn't what I want. Make me a promise that you'll never,
under any circumstances, "do" anything.
Hyacinth
What do you mean?
Vetch
Anything those people expect of you.
Hyacinth
Those people?
Vetch
Don't torment me by pretending not to understand: you know the
people I mean. I can't call them by their names, because I don't know
who they are. But you do—and they know you.
Hyacinth
I suppose I know the people you've in mind. But, I don't grasp the
need for these solemnities.
Vetch
Don't they want to make use of you?
Hyacinth
I see what you mean: you think they want me to blow up some train
for them. Well, if that's what troubles you, you may sleep sound. I
shall never do any of their work.
Vetch
Do you take your oath to that? Never anything?
Hyacinth
Never anything at all.
Vetch
Will you swear it on Pinnie's memory?
Hyacinth
Willingly.
Vetch
Then, you are saved!
Hyacinth
No, I'm damned.
BLACKOUT
Princess
You're braver than I gave you credit for.
Paul
I shall have to be brave if I associate a while longer with you.
Princess
I didn't expect you.
Paul
Well, here I am—that's the great thing.
Princess
It will be a still greater thing when you're there.
Paul
Where is it? I don't think you told me.
(The Princess gives him a letter which he reads, then crushes and
throws in the fire.)
Princess
What are you afraid of? I take it the house is known to the
police. If we go, I suppose we must admit that we go.
Paul
No writing—no writing.
Princess
You're terribly careful.
Paul
Careful of you—yes.
Princess
This give me a much less keen emotion than when I act by myself.
Paul (hesitating)
Is that what you go in for—keen emotion?
Princess
Surely, don't you?
Paul
God forbid! I hope to have as little of any sort as possible.
Princess
It would be hard if one couldn't have a little pleasure on the
way.
Paul
My pleasure is keeping very cool.
Princess
I like quietness—in the midst of tumult.
Paul
You've rare ideas.
Princess
I wonder if you're not too prudent. I wonder if you want to go at
all.
Paul
Why else should I have come?
Princess
You don't take me seriously. I wonder if you can find it in your
conscience to work with me?
Paul
It isn't in my conscience I find it.
Princess
Never mind, I think I have you in my power.
Paul
You've got everyone in your power.
Princess
That extraordinary little sister of yours—surely you take her
seriously?
Paul
I'm fond of her—if that's what you mean.
Princess
She's a prodigious person.
Paul
That she is—I don't see what interest you can have—
Princess
Interest in what?
Paul
In getting in so deep.
Princess (wryly)
Am I so deep?
Paul
Up to your pretty little neck. If I was your husband, I'd come and
take you away.
Princess
You might find that difficult to do. Please, don't speak of my
husband, you know nothing about him.
Paul
I know what Hyacinth has told me.
Princess
Oh, Hyacinth!
Paul
I don't have his manners.
Princess
I don't know that pretty manners are exactly what we're working
for here. He's very foolish. He's deplorably conventional.— Have you
had a visit from Mr. Vetch?
Paul
The old gentleman who fiddles? No—he has never done me that
honor.
Princess
You can thank me for that, I prevented him. He's in great distress
about Hyacinth—about the danger he's in. You know what I mean.
Paul
Yes, I know. Well?
Princess
He was going to you—to beg you to interfere— But, I prevented
him.
Paul
That was considerate of you beyond everything.
Princess
It was not meant as consideration for you. It was a piece of
calculation on my part. Do you know why I asked you to come and see
me? Do you know why I went to see your sister? It was all part of a
plan.
Paul
We thought it was all just ordinary upper class slumming.
Princess
Joke if you like. I wanted to save Hyacinth.
Paul
That's a fine idea.
Princess
I've no patience with his opinions. But, after all, it's not our
friends' opinions that we love them for. I wanted you to help me get
him out of his scrape.
Paul
His scrape isn't important.
Princess
They must be persuaded not to call him.
Paul
Persuade them, then, dear Madame.
Princess
How can I persuade them? I've no influence. Besides, my motives
are suspect.
Paul
Shall I tell them he lacks the nerve?
Princess
He doesn't—he doesn't. Tell them he has changed his opinions.
Paul
That would be unwise. I don't wish to denounce him as a traitor.
Princess
Tell them it's simply my wish.
Paul
You're very fond of him. But, you ought to remember that, in the
line you've chosen, our affections, our natural ties, our timidities,
our shrinkings—all those things are as nothing. They must never weigh
a feather beside our service.
Princess
Why don't you do his job for him?
Paul
Better to do my own.
Princess
And, what is that?
Paul
Don't know, I wait to be instructed.
Princess
Have you taken an oath too?
Paul
Ah, Madame, the oaths I take, I don't tell.
Princess
Can you see your comrade destroyed like that?
Paul
You had better leave my comrade to me.
Princess (with irritation)
Well then, shall we go?
Paul
If all this was only a pretext?
Princess (scornfully)
I believe you are afraid!
BLACKOUT
Hyacinth
I saw Lady Aurora leaving.
Princess
It's a pity that you didn't come a little sooner. You'd have
assisted at a scene.
Hyacinth
At a scene?
Princess
She made a scene of tears. Perfectly well meant. She thinks I go
too far.
Hyacinth
I imagine you tell her things you don't tell me.
Princess
Oh, you, my dear fellow.
Hyacinth
You've been going to some queer holes lately.
Princess
With your sentiments, you've no right to enquire.
Hyacinth
Don't you think so?
Princess
You mean your famous pledge to "act"? That will never come to
anything.
Hyacinth
Why not, if you please?
Princess
It's too absurd, it's too vague. You won't have to do it.
Hyacinth ( a little offended)
I think you mean I won't do it.
Princess (bluntly)
Well, then, you won't do it.
Hyacinth
You will—at the pace you're going.
Princess
What do you know about it? You're not worthy to know.
Hyacinth
You do go too far.
Princess
Of course, I do. How else does one know one's gone far enough?
Lady Aurora's an angel, but she isn't the least in it, is she?
Hyacinth
Hardly.
Princess (troubled)
How can one go too far these days? That's the word of cowards.
Hyacinth
You think Lady Aurora's a coward?
Princess
Yes—in not having the courage of her opinions. The way the
English can go half way to a thing, then stick in the middle!
Hyacinth
That's not your weakness, certainly! But the thing Lady Aurora's
most afraid of is you!
Princess
There's one thing she's not afraid of. She'd marry your friend,
Mr. Paul Muniment.
Hyacinth
Do you really think so?
Princess
She adores the ground he walks on.
Hyacinth
What would Belgrave Square and Inglefield say?
Princess
What they say already—that she's crazy. She'd do it in a minute.
It would be fine to see it. It would be magnificent.
Hyacinth
She cannot marry him unless he asks her—she has not gone that
far. And perhaps he won't.
Princess (wryly)
I don't think he will. Why haven't you been to see me lately?
Hyacinth
I knew you were deep in business.
Princess
And, you think it's all a mistake? Yes, I know that. If you were
scared of me three or four months ago, I don't know what you'd think
today. If you knew! I've risked everything.
Hyacinth
Fortunately, I don't know anything.
Princess
Why are you avoiding Paul and Rosy?
Hyacinth
It's no use keeping up pretenses. Our views are so different.
Princess
And, you are so grimly sincere! But, you could see Rosy—her views
and yours coincide remarkably.
Hyacinth
I don't like Rosy.
Princess
Neither do I. Aren't you going to be in a fix when the hour
strikes, and you're called upon to fulfill your vow?
Hyacinth
I'm in an awful fix. But, you just said it won't happen.
Princess
I pity you, my poor friend. I can imagine nothing more terrible
than to find yourself face to face with your obligation—and the
spirit that prompted you to undertake it dead within you.
Hyacinth
Terrible, indeed, Princess.
Princess
I pray to God it may never be your fate. You know, a short time
ago, I had a visit from Mr. Vetch.
Hyacinth
It was kind of you to see him.
Princess
Any friend of yours.— But he's delightful, I assure you. Do you
know he came to me to beg me to snatch you away?
Hyacinth
From the danger that hangs over me?
Princess
He was most touching.
Hyacinth (affectionately)
He's a good old man.
Princess
He has a rather flattering belief in my personal effect on you.
Hyacinth
And he thought you'd try to get me to back out? He does you an
injustice: you won't.
Princess
Because I know you won't be called.
Hyacinth
How do you know that?
Princess
Paul keeps me informed. We've information, my poor, dear boy.
You're so much out of it, that if I told you, I fear you wouldn't
understand.
Hyacinth
Yes, I'm out of it—but I still take as much of an interest in the
real business as I ever did.
Princess
Dear, infatuated little aristocrat—was that ever very much?
Hyacinth
It was—and still is enough. I abide by the decision of others. I
don't have to agree.
Princess
But you must. The old ferocious selfishness of the upper classes
must come down. They won't leave gracefully, so they must be ushered
out.
Hyacinth
I wish to God I could see it the way you see it.
Princess
What we're doing is at least worth trying. If those in power lack
the will or the brains to think out a peaceful solution—on their
heads be the blood!
Hyacinth
Princess, dearest Princess, if anything should happen to you!
Princess
To me! And pray, why not to me? What title have in to an
exemption? Why am I so sacrosanct and so precious?
Hyacinth
Because there's no one in the world, and never has been anyone in
the world, like you.
Princess
Oh, thank you!
BLACKOUT
Paul
I've received a letter from your husband.
Princess
How in the world could he know your address?
Paul
Madame Grandoni, I think. He must have met her in Paris.
Princess
What an incorrigible cad.
Paul
I don't see that for writing to me. Would you like to see his
letter?
Princess
Thank you, no. Nothing could induce me to touch anything he has
touched.
Paul
You touch his money, my dear lady.
Princess
Because it makes him suffer.
Paul
I should think it would please him.
Princess
Why?
Paul
Because it shows you are dependent on him.
Princess
Not when he knows I don't use it for myself. He hates my politics
almost as much as he hates me.
Paul
He doesn't hate you. His letter satisfies me of that.
Princess (facing him)
What are you leading up to? Are you suggesting I go back to my
husband?
Paul
I don't know that I'd go so far as to advise it. But I believe you
will before long.
Princess (really nettled)
And on what does that extraordinary prediction rest?
Paul
Because you'll soon have nothing to live on. He informs me that I
need count on no more supplies from your hands.
Princess
He addresses you in very plain terms.
Paul
Yes.
Princess
And can you repeat such insults to me without the smallest
apparent discomposure? You are indeed the most extraordinary man!
Paul
Why is it an insult? It's the simple truth—I take your money.
Princess
You take it for the cause—you don't take it for yourself.
Paul
Your husband isn't obliged to consider that.
Princess (bitingly)
I didn't know you were on his side!
Paul
You know whose side I'm on.
Princess
What does he know? What business has he to address you so?
Paul
Madame Grandoni has told him I have great influence with you.
Princess
She was welcome to tell him that!
Paul
He reasons that when I find you have nothing to give, I'll let you
go.
Princess
Noting more to give. Does he think I count for nothing?
Paul
Apparently he thinks I don't count you much.
Princess (bitterly)
Well, I've always known you care more for my money than for me.
But that's as it should be for a revolutionary. It makes no difference
to me.
Paul (enjoying irritating her)
Then, by your own calculation, the Prince is right.
Princess
My dear sir, my interest in you never depended on your interest in
me.— So, he stops my allowance.
Paul
From the first of next month.
Princess
I'll fight him tooth and nail in court.
Paul
How? Your association with me and the Cause are not the sort of
things that should come to light.
Princess
Why should it come to light? It's my money—separation money. What
I do with it—
Paul
He can produce the fact that you had a little bookbinder living in
your house.
Princess
What has that to do with it?
Paul
That would be for the court to appreciate. And, what about the
fact that Madame Grandoni has withdrawn her protection?
Princess
Ah, but not for Hyacinth!
Paul
That's only a detail. In any case, I shouldn't in the least care
to have you going to law.
Princess
Sometimes you seem afraid! That's terribly against your being a
first rate man.
Paul
I haven't the smallest pretension of being a first rate man.
Princess
Oh, you're deep—and you're provoking!
Paul
Don't you remember how you accused me of being a coward and a
traitor, of playing false, of wanting to back out?
Princess
Most distinctly! How can I help feeling that you've got
incalculable ulterior motives and are consummately using
me—consummately using us all?— Well, I don't care!
Paul
The best reason in the world for not going to law with your
husband is this: When you haven't a penny left, you'll be obliged to
go back and live with him.
Princess
How can that be? Haven't I my own property?
Paul
The Prince assures me that you've almost nothing left.
Princess
You've the most extraordinary tone. You seem to be saying that
from the moment I have no more money to give you, I'm of no more value
than the washed out tea leaves in that pot?
Paul
I've no intention of saying anything so offensive—but since you
bring it up, perhaps it's as well I should let you know that I believe
in giving your money or rather your husband's money to our business,
you gave the most valuable thing you had to contribute.
Princess
This is the day of plain truths! You don't count my devotion or my
intelligence—even rating my faculties modestly?
Paul
I count your intelligence but not your devotion. You are not
trusted— well, where it makes the difference.
Princess
Not trusted! Why, I could be hanged tomorrow.
Paul
They may let you hang—without fully trusting you. You are likely
to weary of us, and I think, you're weary even now.
Princess
Ah, you must be a first rate man—you're such a brute.
Paul
I didn't say you were weary of me. But you can never live poor.
You don't begin to know the meaning of it.
Princess
Oh, no. I'm not tired of you! In a moment you'll make me cry with
rage—and no man has done that for years. I was very poor when I was a
girl.
Paul (unconvinced)
You'll go back to your husband.
Princess
I don't see why they trust you more than they do me?
Paul
I'm not sure they do. I've heard something this evening that
suggests that.
Princess
And, may one know what it is?
Paul
A communication that should have been made through me was made
through someone else.
Princess
A communication?
Paul
To Hyacinth.
Princess (uneasily)
To Hyacinth—?
Paul
He has his orders. But they didn't entrust it to me.
Princess
He was here this morning. Do you suppose he already had it?
Paul
Shinkel carried the order to him Sunday night.
Princess
But, he was here just now, and he told me nothing of it.
Paul
That was quite right of him.
Princess
What do they want him to do?
Paul
I think I'd better not tell you until it's over.
Princess
And when will it be over?
Paul
He has several days. He has considerable discretion as to seizing
his chance. The thing's remarkably easy for him. I heard it all from
Shinkel.
Princess
Shinkel trusts you, then?
Paul
Yes, but he won't trust you. Hyacinth has an invitation to a party
at a country house. At a grand party, he'll fit right in—perfect
gentleman.
Princess (tartly)
He'll like that.
Paul
If he doesn't like it, he needn't do it.
Princess
And the target?
Paul
A certain royal personage. Do you want to warn him?
Princess
By no means. But I prefer to do the business myself.
Paul
To fall by your beautiful hand would be too good for him.
Princess
However if he fails, it will be useful, valuable?
Paul
It's worth trying, even if it fails. He's a very bad institution,
although as a private person, quite blameless.
Princess
And, you don't mean to go near Hyacinth?
Paul
I mean to leave him free.
(Pause.)
Princess
Paul Muniment, you are a truly first rate man! Why have you told
me this?
Paul
So that you can't throw it up to me later that I didn't.
Princess
What will Hyacinth do?
Paul
I don't know. He'll either kill himself if he can't go through
with it—or he'll kill The Grand Duke.
Princess
God! I must talk to him.
Paul
No. If Hyacinth fails or funks it, then it's your chance. There's
a second party.
Princess
God—poor Hyacinth. What will he do? What will he do? Oh, it's my
fault. It's through me that he's changed his ideas.
Paul
But, not because of you, really. You've always stood for the
Cause.
Princess
Yes, but I showed him the other side—
Paul
That cannot be helped.
Princess
I wish I hadn't said some of the things I said to him this
morning. I told him I didn't think he'd do it. He was talking to me,
trying to tell me without actually telling me. It was his swan song. I
should have known, but I was caught up in my own egotism, I was so
smug.
Paul
There's nothing to do but wait and see.
Princess
He's only a child. A poor deluded child.
Paul
If he weren't a man, he'd have run away. He won't run. He'll
either do it, or he'll destroy himself.
Princess
I don't think he can do it. I don't believe he can do it.
(bursting into tears)
Paul (after a moment)
I don't mean to aggravate you, but you will go back to your
husband.
(The Princess shakes her head at Paul, they stare at each other as
the Curtain falls.)
CURTAIN